Hawaii Five-O (1968) s11e16 Episode Script
The Bark and the Bite
You know, there's an old Hindustani saying that the, uh, master can learn from the dog, -just as dog learns from the master.
- Really? Harry Clive's real name is Howard Caine.
He's suspected of being one of the top society burglars on mainland.
Why is it so hard for you to accept a simple warning? Because you are implying that my judgment is no good.
I know when a man's in love with me.
Okay.
Put out an all points bulletin on the bloodhound.
[BARKING.]
Uh-oh.
[DOG BARKS.]
[IN SOFT VOICE.]
Shh, Daphne, lie down.
[DOG BARKS.]
Daphne, you wanna get us in trouble or something.
WOMAN [ON PA.]
: Announcing Flight Now arriving at [DOG BARKING.]
[SPEAKING IN HAWAIIAN.]
Excuse me, ma'am.
That wouldn't be a dog in there? Who would keep a dog in a $300 bag? - May I look? - How dare you? [BARKING.]
She's not real.
She's stuffed.
Uh, besides, what makes you think we were on this flight, anyway? As a matter of fact, I was just here meeting someone.
Hope you enjoyed your flight, Ms.
Conover.
Ma'am, we have a quarantine law here in Hawaii.
Arriving animals must be isolated here for four months.
Her youth will be gone in four months.
Come on, Daphne.
CLIVE: I wouldn't do that if I were you.
They're very strict about that quarantine.
They've never had a case of rabies on the islands.
Yeah.
Where's their sense of adventure? - Right.
I know how you feel, Miss - Conover.
Ms.
Conover, Harry Clive.
I know how you feel.
They just took my dog off the plane.
I wouldn't have let them do it, but I checked first.
They have over a 1000 animals in quarantine.
They treat them so well, that it's almost like a canine country club.
I'll bet they stage a luau for them every night.
But really, the kennels are clean, and they feed them very well.
And you can visit yours as often as you like.
Besides, you don't have to worry about, uh, taking care of them when you're busy.
Here on Honolulu, a young lady like yourself is obviously gonna be very busy.
[WOMAN SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY OVER PA.]
Well [CHUCKLES.]
Aloha, Daphne, beautiful.
[DOG BARKING.]
McGARRETT: Yes, sir.
Yes, sir, I understand.
Yes, Governor.
I understand that, Governor.
But playing host and tour guide to an heiress is a little out of my line.
I'm not asking you to be a tour guide, Steve.
I'm just asking you to keep an eye on her.
Her mother, Harriet Conover, was one of my dearest friends.
Well, frankly she spoiled the girl, but Dilys was the baby of the family Well, she doesn't look like a baby any more.
Wait a minute, haven't I read about some famous Conover jewels? Yes.
A matched pair of Burmese rubies worth a fortune.
Harriet bequeathed one to Dilys, one to Dilys' older sister Laura.
Yeah, and one of them was stolen recently.
Right, Laura's.
Just a few weeks ago, in San Francisco.
Now if Dilys has brought the other ruby to the islands, You'd better have a talk with her.
Governor, I've got to testify in that H.
P.
D.
lawsuit, I've got to give a deposition in the Miller Case, and I have to appear before League of Women Voters.
Just have a talk with her, Steve.
Tell her to be careful.
Consider it a favor to me.
You'll find she's a very attractive, though headstrong, young woman.
Yes, sir.
[PHONE RECEIVER THUDS.]
it's nonsense.
Nonsense.
Look, you are the law.
The law has my dog.
You give me back my dog, then we'll talk about the ruby.
I'm not here to make any trade offs.
Besides, the dog is not my department.
Are you going to tell me that a great big 180 pound officer can't do something about a little 4-pound yorkie? Ever hear of rabies? - Ever hear of fascism? - Yeah.
And fortunately, we don't have either one here.
Ms.
Conover, let's be serious for a moment.
If those rubies you and your sister inherited are worth a quarter of a million dollars each, and as a matched pair, they're easily worth a million.
Now a smart thief may come back for seconds.
If he does, you'll be the first person I scream at.
Save your voice.
Take a few precautions.
I have.
I'm not a fool, Mr.
McGarrett.
The ruby's in a safe place.
I only wear it when I'm dressed formally.
And frankly, I don't expect a lot of that over here.
- Slumming? - No.
Retreating.
I came over here to forget a very forgettable man.
All I expect to do is sunbathe, skin dive, and miss my dog.
You can always visit him.
Sure.
- Now if you'll excuse me.
- Of course.
Thank you.
EUDORA: She's made a beautiful adjustment.
Obviously, she has a very healthy self-image.
And her social skills are extraordinary.
I mean, she's already developed a meaningful relationship with Dudley.
Yes, I hope you're not letting it get too meaningful, Ms.
Finch.
Call me Eudora.
I like to think that they call me Eudora.
[DOGS BARKING.]
- You know each other.
- Yes.
We met at the airport.
He's so devoted.
He's been here every day to visit Dudley.
Poor baby, who knows, he's probably the victim of a broken home.
- Mr.
Clive? - Dudley.
- Good morning, Mr.
Clive.
CLIVE: Ms.
Eudora.
- Ms.
Conover.
Hi.
- Hello.
Dudley! Dudley! Oh, Dudley.
Hi.
Hi.
Snack time.
I don't like to tamper with their schedules, so if you'll excuse me.
- Is she for real? Ha, ha.
- Oh, she's sweet.
I suspect she thinks she's running a nursery, but she's sweet.
- Well, how's the vacation? - Oh, quiet.
Restful.
Not too restful, I hope.
That all depends on your standards, Mr.
Clive.
[CHUCKLES.]
And how are you doing without Daphne? DILYS: You remembered her name.
CLIVE: I remembered her mistress too.
Well, it seems that Dudley and Daphne have become fast friends.
Yeah, that it does.
You know, there's an old Hindustani saying that the, uh, master can learn from the dog, just as the dog learns from the master.
Really? And what does that sound like in Hindustani? I don't know.
But in English, it sounds like "How'd you like to have dinner with me tonight?" Okay.
[WHIMPERING.]
- Good morning, Danno.
- Good morning, Steve.
Since when did you start reading gossip columns.
Sometimes it pays.
You catch up with familiar people.
- Who, for instance? - The Governor's friend, Dilys Conover.
"Who's the hot-tempered stranger who's been secretly squiring heiress Dilys Conover all over the islands the last few days.
Whoever he is, he threw a mean punch at our photographer for trying to take their picture.
" That man does seem to like his privacy.
I wonder if he has something to hide.
- Shall I check him out? - Yeah, you'd better.
Especially since I promised the Governor I would.
You realize tomorrow is an anniversary? What? I'll be a week since we met.
- Oh, you are sentimental.
- You bet I am.
I think we should celebrate.
- How? - I don't know.
Let's get dressed up.
Make it a special evening.
Well, I really didn't bring over anything very dressy.
I'm sure you can think of something.
- Excuse me.
Here you go, sir.
- Thank you.
Nothing unusual, Steve.
Just like any ordinary couple.
Except for the hours they keep.
Schedule getting to you, Danno? Racketeers don't burn the candle the way these two do.
- Did Duke check out that car? - Yeah.
it's a rental.
Uh According to the agency, the man's name is Harry Clive.
He gave a permanent address in Bel Air California, and a temporary one here in Honolulu.
It's a house he's renting out in the Kohla area.
Wait a minute.
I've got an idea.
Why don't you pick up the check he handled, take it to the lab tonight, when they lift a few prints, have them put them on the wire to the bureau.
We can have a positive ID on Clive by morning.
Will do.
- Thank you very much.
- Thank you, sir.
Mei Lou.
You're just about to make a major contribution to law and order in Hawaii.
Hey, what about my tip? I guess you'll have to call me at the office.
[WHIRS.]
[DINGS.]
- Steve? McGARRETT: What've you got? Here's the story on those prints we sent to the bureau.
Harry Clive's real name is Howard Caine.
He's suspected of being one of the top society burglars on the mainland.
- What do you mean? - He never had a conviction.
They haven't been able to catch him with the goods.
You think he might be over here to try to match a pair of rubies? Could be, Danno.
Could be.
Which puts this whole Conover operation in a different light.
Let me see that.
Yeah.
[INTERCOM BUZZES.]
Yes, Mr.
McGarrett? Luana, get in touch with Captain Steve Mills, San Francisco Police Department.
See if he can come up with a mug shot of, uh, Howard Caine, also known as Harry Clive.
If so, I'd like him to show it to Dilys Conover's sister Laura.
She may not be in the phone book, but he can find her in the Social Register.
Right away.
Come on, Danno.
I've got an idea.
- How straight do we play it, Steve? - What do you mean? Do we tell Clive we know he's Howard Caine? No.
Let's give him enough rope and see if he'll hang himself.
He doesn't deny himself any luxuries, does he? McGARRETT: Well, if you're gonna play with the rich, you've gotta look rich.
[DOORBELL RINGS.]
Maybe we should've phoned ahead for an appointment.
A pretty messy housekeeper.
[DOORBELL RINGS.]
Let's try the back.
Boy, it looks like a twister went through this room.
Halt! You've gotta admit it's a switch.
Second-story man gets ransacked.
Maybe Clive did it himself.
Practicing his craft, huh.
[DANNY CHUCKLES.]
May I help you? - Mr.
Clive? - Yes.
McGarrett.
Hawaii Five-0.
My associate, Dan Williams.
You, uh, gentlemen seem a bit mature to be trainees.
- Beg your pardon? - This search.
If I were grading you on it, I might give you a Q minus if I felt charitable.
Mr.
Clive, we didn't do it.
And I must admit, we usually hear that from the other side of the desk.
Do you really expect me to believe that you didn't do it? Well, it would certainly move things along.
All right.
Consider them moved.
Now, uh, would you like to tell me what you're doing here? First, would you like to tell us what you're doing in Hawaii? [SCOFFS.]
A little business.
A little pleasure.
- What kind of business? CLIVE: I'm in imports.
- What kind of pleasure? - Whatever I can find.
How long have you known Dilys Conover? About a week.
Why? Well, from what we've heard, it's been a rather full week.
She's a very attractive lady.
But you know the laws better than I.
Is there a local ordinance against spending time with an attractive lady? Need I answer that? You're certain you have no idea who might have ransacked this room? Hmm, no, not the faintest.
Well, when you find out Oh, you'll be the first to know.
I don't think I'll hold my breath waiting for his call.
- Wanna put a tail on him? - Not now, Danno.
He'll be expecting it.
Uh, this is McGarrett.
Patch me through to the Five-0 office, please.
Are you gonna tell Ms.
Conover about Caine? No, not quite yet, Danno.
You haven't met the lady.
If you're gonna tangle with her, you better have all the ammunition you can muster.
LUANA [OVER RADIO.]
: Five-0.
Yeah, Luana.
Did San Francisco PD get a mug shot of Howard Caine? Yes, sin And they're showing it to Miss Conover's sister Good.
Get me Laura Conover's phone number in San Francisco.
As soon as I get back, I wanna call her.
McGARRETT [OVER PHONE.]
: Ms.
Conover are you telling me you haven 't looked at the picture yet? Why should I? Why should I care if Dilys is mixed up again with some riffraff? Let it be a lesson to her.
It could be a very expensive lesson, Ms.
Conover.
For both of you.
I'm not just concerned about your sister.
This may be an opportunity to recover your ruby.
Well, I don't suppose there's any harm in taking a second look.
He does look rather familiar.
No.
No, the man I'm thinking of was different.
- Different? how? - He looked older He was bald, and he had a grey moustache.
The moustache might've been a fake.
I really didn't tweak it, Mr.
McGarrett.
I didn't assume that you had.
Where did you meet the man you just mentioned? He came to my home, for a meeting of the Civic Purity League.
I formed it, you know.
Do you remember who brought him? He came on his own.
The meeting's open to anyone.
Anyone, that is, who has an interest in improving the moral climate here in San Francisco.
If it was Caine, he must've leaped at that invitation.
I don't suppose you were wearing the ruby on that occasion? Hardly.
It was in the safe, in the library.
When did you discover it was missing? A few days later.
When I came back from a weekend in the country.
Very well, Ms.
Conover.
Thank you.
By the way, is there anything you would like me to tell your sister? You can tell that supercilious, sanctimonious, insidious, insensitive, spoiled silly, slip of a simp, that if the devil had her hindmost I wouldn't lift a finger: She was the baby of the family A condition that still lingers in her soiled psyche, which is about the dankest place in the continent.
If I never see her again, I shall hold a celebration in my honor Have a good day, Ms.
Conover.
Boy, I've seen more family affection in a cage full of starving pythons.
No wonder Dilys is so cool about her sister losing the ruby.
You know, there may even be a better reason for her attitude, Danno.
You think Dilys was in on the heist? She knew Caine before? Who knows? She's such an obvious kook.
She's harder to read than a wet newspaper.
Come on, Danno.
I wanna check something.
Leaving? Oh! But he's just gotten over his separation anxieties about you.
Now he'll have separation anxieties about me.
And them.
Oh, poor Dudley.
Iddy-biddy-storm-tossed baby.
Well, sometimes these things can't be helped.
There was an illness in the family.
Nothing rabid? The two-legged family.
Oh! I see.
I was, uh, hoping to leave Honolulu tomorrow, Ms.
Eudora.
EUDORA: So quickly? That could be traumatic for Dudley.
I'll make it up to him, somehow.
[WHIMPERS.]
DANNY: how much are you gonna tell Ms.
Conover? McGARRETT: I think I'll tell her that her friend, Mr.
Clive, may be dangerous.
DANNY: That you know he's really Howard Caine? No.
If they are working together, that might be just enough to send them underground, Danno.
- Wait for me, will you? - Yeah.
Our manager, Ms.
Hughes, didn't tell me to expect a journalist, Mr.
Armitage.
- What kind of article are you writing? - Human interest.
You know, what the owners are like.
- Oh! - That sort of thing.
Well, our dogs come from some of the finest families.
Daphne, the yorkie, she belongs to an heiress.
I can't reveal names, you understand.
- Oh, and the poodle? - Mahomet? - Mm-hm.
- Mahomet, he belongs to a Sheik.
Actually the Sheik was very unhappy about the quarantine.
He tried to buy the islands to get around it.
Poor Mahomet.
I wonder what kind of values he'll grow up with.
What about the man who was leaving as I came in? - Oh! he belongs to Dudley.
- Oh.
Yes.
The gentleman is terribly devoted, - but I think there's a stability problem.
- What do you mean? Well, poor Dudley only arrived a week ago, and his owner's going to take him away tomorrow.
Poor baby.
it's so traumatic.
[DOGS BARKING.]
how dare you drag that dreary sister of mine into this.
How dare I? What does that mean? It means, I think you and Laura would make a lovely couple.
Mr.
and Mrs.
Clean.
You could help her with that purity league of hers.
You enjoy practicing your backhand on me? Why not? Are you so different than any other man? Let me get to the point, Ms.
Conover.
Your sister thinks that your friend, Mr.
Clive, may have been at her home in San Francisco a few days before her ruby was stolen.
My sister would say anything to spoil my vacation.
- You know, I think you would too.
- I'm not trying to spoil your vacation.
I just want it to be safe and pleasant.
Your concern overwhelms me.
Why is it so hard for you to accept a simple warning? Because you are implying that my judgment is no good.
I know when a man's in love with me.
I don't tell you how to catch crooks.
I do not expect you to tell me how to run my life.
Okay.
This is my office phone number, just in case you should ever need it.
It would be a pleasure to hear from you.
Thank you.
[RINGS.]
- Hello? - Well, hello there.
- Is there something wrong? - No.
Hello.
Just checking.
Are we still gonna dress for this evening? Of course.
Good.
I'm really looking forward to it.
Bye- bye .
[DOGS BARKING.]
- I think you better leave, Mr.
Armitage.
- Leave? I checked with the manager, Ms.
Hughes.
You are not a reporter.
I don't know what game you're playing.
Ms.
Finch, I have a confession to make.
Mr.
Clive may be Dudley's legal owner.
But, I'm his natural owner.
- Are you saying? - I was young.
Foolish.
I had no one to turn to.
Are you saying you let Mr.
Clive adopt Dudley? You understand.
And I've felt so alone, until now.
If I could just hold him.
Nuzzle him, just once.
I don't believe you, Mr.
Armitage.
- And, if you don't leave this instant-- - You'll do what I tell you to do.
I'm not afraid of you, Mr.
Armitage.
Furthermore, I intend to scream my head off-- ARMITAGE: Ah, too late.
One sound out of you.
Hmm.
You wouldn't.
I guess you would.
Better.
This is what we're gonna do.
[DOGS BARKING.]
EUDORA: Shh.
Shh.
Shh.
Shh.
It's all right, Moses.
Thank you.
Open the door.
- Get the dog in.
Let's go.
- Get in, Dudley.
Get in.
I never thought I'd say this, but I hope you bite him.
- If you hurt-- - You can have him back in an hour.
If you behave.
Count to ten before you move from there.
[CAR DOOR OPENS THEN CLOSES.]
[ENGINE REVS.]
One, two, four, six, eight, ten.
OFFICER: H.
P.
D.
This is Central.
EUDORA [OVER PHONE.]
: Officer this is Eudora Finch, of the Animal Quarantine Station.
I want to report a kidnapping.
Uh, name and description of the victim, please? EUDORA: His name is Dudley He is male.
He's three years old, sort of reddish brown.
Has big Hoppy ears.
Okay, that's, uh, Dudley, male, three years old, reddish brown - big floppy ears? EUDORA: Yes.
He weighs about 90 pounds and his eyes are very sad.
Just what're we talking about, ma'am.
EUDORA: One of my charges, of course.
A bloodhound.
Don 't you understand it's a dog-napping! I see.
EUDORA: And the culprit used a gun.
He even threatened to shoot Dudley if I didn't surrender to him.
Please.
Please.
Put your best men to work on this.
Immediately! Lady, let's start from the beginning.
[ENGINE REVS.]
[DUDLEY BARKING.]
ARMITAGE: Come on, boy.
Come.
Hey, Dudley! Come here, boy! Dudley! Come here! [RADIO CRACKLES.]
Williams.
OFFICER [OVER RADIO.]
: Uh, Williams, I don't know if it matters to you, but, uh, a dog was stolen from Animal Quarantine.
And it belonged to that guy you were checking on, uh, Harry Clive.
I have a full report here, if you wanna hear it.
But I hope you're sitting down.
CLIVE [SINGING.]
: When they begin the beguine It brings back a night Of tropical splendor It brings back a sound Of music so tender When they begin The beguine - You have anything against doors? - I told you tonight would be a special night.
Happy anniversary.
Guess what just showed up on the police blotter? Mr.
Clive's dog was stolen.
- His dog? - Yes- His bloodhound.
Somebody sprung him from the Quarantine kennel at gunpoint.
I think I've had this case, Danno.
Why would anyone go to all that trouble to steal a mutt? Well, heh, maybe somebody was lonely, ha, ha.
Uh, well, it must mean something, Steve.
Why? - Another call from the Governor? - Oh, boy.
CLIVE: Doesn't it worry you, to wear a ruby like this in public? Well, I didn't want to embarrass you.
But, it must be worth at least $20,000.
Even a bit more.
[KNOCKING ON DOOR.]
Come in.
You can put it right there.
Yes, sir.
So where are we having dinner tonight? - At Michelle's.
- Mm.
I got us a table by the water.
The moonlight will shine in your wine glass.
- Ah, you are romantic.
- Heh.
- Are you waiting for something? - My tip.
I'll settle for the ruby.
Um [DILYS SCOFFS.]
I knew this hotel had help trouble.
There.
And I hope it causes you as much aggravation as it's caused me.
Thank you.
Now you can do me one more favor.
Get me some towels.
Lots of them.
By the way, Ms.
Conover.
Any funny stuff, and your boyfriend here's gonna wind up without a head.
- You understand? - Yes, I understand.
Um This is a very critical moment of your life.
Is there any chance I could convince you that crime doesn't pay? [DOGS BARKING.]
EUDORA: And I called the police.
Oh, dear, I am in trouble.
No, no, on the contrary, you acted with intelligence and courage.
Can you describe him? Oh, well, he weighs about a 100 pounds, he has brindle coloring, and long ears.
No, no, no.
Not the dog, Ms.
Finch.
The man.
Armitage.
Oh.
Well, he had brown hair and freckles.
Lots of freckles.
McGARRETT: Hey, watch it.
EUDORA: Oh, ha, ha.
Hey, I think I know whose dog this is.
- Okay, girl.
Okay, honey.
EUDORA: Daphne! Armitage and the dog could be anywhere by now.
Danno, there has to be a reason that someone would risk a felony rap to steal a dog.
MAN [OVER RADIO.]
: Central calling Steve McGarrett.
Central calling Steve McGarrett.
Yeah.
McGarrett.
Go ahead.
OFFICER: Steve, H.
P.
D.
picked up the getaway truck.
Uh, from examination of the scene, it appears the hound made a clean getaway.
That'll cheer up Eudora.
- How did they figure that one out? - Uh, the tracks were clean.
A man's footprints, and paw prints leading away from the truck, and only a man's prints coming back.
Okay.
Put out an all points bulletin on the bloodhound.
[OVER RADIO.]
Yeah, and I don't want any comments.
Can you get me a good description of the mutt? He's a bloodhound, pal.
He's tawny, long-eared, you know? You know how bloodhounds look.
You've seen them all in those chain-gang pictures, haven't you? That's got to be Dudley.
[PHONE RINGS.]
Hold on a minute, Steve.
H.
P.
D.
DILYS [OVER PHONE.]
: This is Dilys Conover.
- I want to speak to Mr.
McGarrett.
- Yeah.
Just a minute, lady.
Uh, someone trying to reach you, Steve.
A, uh, Ms.
Conover.
Okay.
Patch her through.
McGarrett? McGARRETT [OVER PHONE.]
: Yes, Ms.
Conover? I suppose you know, there is only one possible reason that I would be calling you.
- Yes.
Something happened.
DILYS: Right.
- Someone stole your ruby.
DILYS: Right.
- Mr.
Clive.
- Wrong.
Uh Who did it? Well, how should I know.
He didn't sign my memory book.
McGARRETT: Could you give me a description of the man, Ms.
Conover? [SIGHS.]
He had brown hair, and freckles.
Lots of freckles.
Old Freckle face has had a busy day.
How about his age? DILYS: I don't know, uh, 30.
- Height? DILYS: Uh, five-ten and a half 5'11â.
- Weight? - A 165 pounds.
Uh, he said by the time I got through to you, ugh, you'd never catch him.
Okay, Ms.
Conover.
We'll get on it right away.
- Shall I check the airport? - Yeah, you better, Danno.
OFFICER [OVER RADIO.]
: Steve? This is McGarrett, again.
OFFICER: Yes.
Anything further? I've got another APB.
- Suspect's name is Armitage.
- Armitage? What kind of a dog is that, Steve? [CHUCKLES.]
Oh, it's not a dog this time.
Name: Armitage.
- Wait.
Hold it.
- Unh.
Unh.
Unh.
Now, what was that again? I said you sure are cool for somebody who's just lost a precious ruby.
Well, confession.
Freckles got himself a fake.
- But I thought you said-- - I know.
I couldn't tell you I was wearing a fake.
Not on our anniversary.
It's tacky.
Besides, McGarrett made me so nervous about the jewel.
- Well, thank heaven for McGarrett.
- Well, he's not so smart.
[DILYS GRUNTS.]
He thought that you are a thief.
- Me? Ha, ha.
- Heh, yeah.
- Dumb cop.
- Yeah, dumb cop.
There.
Well, unh, where is the, uh, real ruby? Close your eyes.
Don't peek.
Ta-da.
I would've never known the difference.
Yeah, I know.
And, McGarrett thought, well Dumb cop.
Close your eyes.
- What? - Close your eyes.
I've got something for you.
Okay.
- Don't peek.
- I won't.
- Just a second.
- Ha, ha.
[DILYS GRUNTS.]
Just so I can sleep tonight.
Why'd you steal that bloodhound? I don't know what you're talking about.
Let me know if anything turns up, chief.
I'd appreciate that.
Thank you.
Mr.
McGarrett.
Mr.
Armitage.
He was about to hop a flight for Hong Kong.
And he doesn't know what we're talking about.
He doesn't, huh? Hmm.
He doesn't know much about rubies, either.
Short course, Mr.
Armitage.
Nature doesn't make them this bright.
Or, this clean.
Even the best have what they call, inclusions.
But this is a very good imitation.
Then that daffy Dilys sent us all on a wild goose chase.
Sit down.
Two charges of armed robbery, transporting a person against her will, which is kidnapping.
It'd be a shame to spend the rest of your life in prison.
But a little friendly cooperation might help.
Okay.
I was a waiter for a catering service in San Francisco.
I was working a meeting one night at Laura Conover's house.
I happened to spot Harry Clive alone in the library studying the safe.
And a few days later, when Laura Conover's ruby was stolen, you decided Harry Clive was the man, huh? I started watching him.
When he booked the same flight to Hawaii as Dilys Conover, you bought a ticket too.
I suppose you figured you could get your hands on at least one of the rubies, and make a deal with Clive? That's about it.
Not quite.
What about that dog? [DUDLEY WHIMPERS.]
What's this? Oh.
Oh! Oh, okay.
Okay.
All right.
All right.
Oh, okay.
All right, fella.
- Okay, doggie.
Okay.
- Ha, ha.
That's enough.
I like you too.
I like you too.
Oh, dear, Mr.
Clive.
Oh, dear.
Oh, Ms.
Eudora, I told you yesterday that we might be leaving today.
Didn't I? That's just it.
You see, Dudley is Brace yourself.
He's gone.
Gone? You see, Mr.
Clive, he had a gun.
[CRYING.]
What're you talking about? Keep the faith, Mr.
Clive.
Our people are looking for him.
- So is Hawaii Five-0.
- Hawaii Five-0? That nice Mr.
McGarrett and his friend were down here - asking me all sorts of questions.
CLIVE: Oh.
Keep the faith.
Oh.
McGARRETT: Whoever put this lei around the dog's neck almost obstructed justice, Danno.
- The collar? - Yeah.
Hand me that ruby.
Now, if this is the fake one, look at this, couldn't that be the real one? The one Harry Clive stole from Laura Conover in San Francisco.
The problem law enforcement has had with Mr.
Clive is that they haven't been able to catch him with the loot.
Boy, it sure looks real to me.
This could be the most expensive dog collar in the world.
[PHONE RINGS.]
Five-O.
DILYS [OVER PHONE.]
: Give me McGarrett.
Hold on a minute.
Steve, it's Dilys the Dilly.
Sounds like she just woke up.
- Hello? - McGarrett, so help me, if you tell me "I told you so" - What's wrong? - Wrong? Harry Clive is a no good, dirty, lousy, creep.
That's what's wrong.
- And I want you to get him.
McGARRETT: Thank you.
Thank you, for the apology, Ms.
Conover.
Another lady.
[DUDLEY WHIMPERS.]
Where do you think you're going with that dog? Our Animal Quarantine Superintendent, Ms.
Hughes.
That dog is AWOL, McGarrett.
He should've been taken back to quarantine the moment he was found.
I'm sorry, Ms.
Hughes, but there's special circumstances in this case.
HUGHES: Rules are rules.
There are no special circumstances.
Not on my turf.
I need this dog to complete a criminal case.
Do I have to read The Revised Hawaii Statutes relating to animals? - Now, I'll take that leash.
- No, you won't.
Mr.
McGarrett, you have broken the law once already.
That dog goes back into quarantine.
If I, uh, oh-- I may make a suggestion, Ms.
Hughes.
HUGHES: how could you.
- I think you should allow them HUGHES: Let's just take the dog Now, listen.
Ms.
Finch, I don't care whether this man happens to be a policeman, or not.
He's not going to come in here and take over my authority.
Now, you can take that, you can show that to him, and you can stuff it, and that's that.
[IN LOVE VOICE.]
Now, stay.
For a second.
Stay.
Over here.
Come here.
Come here, Dudley.
Sit.
Sit.
[DUDLEY WHIMPERS.]
Stay.
Stay.
Stay.
Over there.
Eudora, will you please come and make him obey? Of course, Steve.
Now, Dudley, come on.
Come on.
Come on.
You get back where you were like a good little boy.
- She's something special.
- Yeah, she sure is.
Sit.
Good boy.
Now, this could prove dangerous, Eudora.
So be careful.
Steve, until Dudley is returned to quarantine, he's in my charge.
No matter what the danger to me.
[DUDLEY WHIMPERING.]
I don't know how you found me, but I am certainly glad you did.
Dudley, you have just earned us half a million dollars by bringing this back home.
McGARRETT: I don't think so, Mr.
Caine.
You're not gonna have a chance to fence that stone.
You're under arrest.
Book him, Danno.
Come on, Dudley.
Hey, Dudley, come on.
No, no, this way.
Dudley, come on.
I think we should have H.
P.
D.
cover that Kahlii affair, Danno.
[KNOCKING ON DOOR.]
- Can we come in? McGARRETT: Oh, of course.
Good morning, ladies.
Recovered from your nap the other night? Actually, that's the most restful time I've had on this vacation.
I just wanted to thank you for looking after me.
You did a wonderful job.
Don't thank me, thank the Governor for assigning me to this case.
Well, I guess this is Aloha.
My four-legged friends and I are flying home this afternoon.
Friends? Is that plural? My little Yorkie was just miserable without him, so with Eudora's help And the help of my boss, Ms.
Hughes, we arranged for Dilys to adopt Dudley.
At least, while his master's in jail.
I'm glad you're here, Ms.
Finch.
I have something for you.
On behalf of the State of Hawaii and Hawaii Five-0, may I present this certificate of merit for outstanding achievement and cooperation.
- For me? McGARRETT: For you.
Oh.
Thank you, Mr.
McGarrett.
I shall cherish it.
Oh.
I have something for you too, Mr.
McGarrett.
I'm sorry, we're not permitted to accept gifts.
You'll have to accept this one.
What is it? A summons? McGARRETT: Yeah.
It is.
It says that I broke Regulation 105 of the Animal Quarantine Code.
"Removing animal from quarantine station without permission," unquote.
Ms.
Finch, I did not remove the animal.
But you had Dudley in your possession.
And you did not return him.
Ignorance of the law is no excuse, Mr.
McGarrett.
Ms.
Finch, surely, in this case there are, extenuating circumstances? But, surely, Ms.
Finch, you could-- Uh-uh-uh.
Now you are tampering, Mr.
Williams.
Ms.
Finch, you're absolutely right.
Book me, Danno.
[LAUGHING.]
- Really? Harry Clive's real name is Howard Caine.
He's suspected of being one of the top society burglars on mainland.
Why is it so hard for you to accept a simple warning? Because you are implying that my judgment is no good.
I know when a man's in love with me.
Okay.
Put out an all points bulletin on the bloodhound.
[BARKING.]
Uh-oh.
[DOG BARKS.]
[IN SOFT VOICE.]
Shh, Daphne, lie down.
[DOG BARKS.]
Daphne, you wanna get us in trouble or something.
WOMAN [ON PA.]
: Announcing Flight Now arriving at [DOG BARKING.]
[SPEAKING IN HAWAIIAN.]
Excuse me, ma'am.
That wouldn't be a dog in there? Who would keep a dog in a $300 bag? - May I look? - How dare you? [BARKING.]
She's not real.
She's stuffed.
Uh, besides, what makes you think we were on this flight, anyway? As a matter of fact, I was just here meeting someone.
Hope you enjoyed your flight, Ms.
Conover.
Ma'am, we have a quarantine law here in Hawaii.
Arriving animals must be isolated here for four months.
Her youth will be gone in four months.
Come on, Daphne.
CLIVE: I wouldn't do that if I were you.
They're very strict about that quarantine.
They've never had a case of rabies on the islands.
Yeah.
Where's their sense of adventure? - Right.
I know how you feel, Miss - Conover.
Ms.
Conover, Harry Clive.
I know how you feel.
They just took my dog off the plane.
I wouldn't have let them do it, but I checked first.
They have over a 1000 animals in quarantine.
They treat them so well, that it's almost like a canine country club.
I'll bet they stage a luau for them every night.
But really, the kennels are clean, and they feed them very well.
And you can visit yours as often as you like.
Besides, you don't have to worry about, uh, taking care of them when you're busy.
Here on Honolulu, a young lady like yourself is obviously gonna be very busy.
[WOMAN SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY OVER PA.]
Well [CHUCKLES.]
Aloha, Daphne, beautiful.
[DOG BARKING.]
McGARRETT: Yes, sir.
Yes, sir, I understand.
Yes, Governor.
I understand that, Governor.
But playing host and tour guide to an heiress is a little out of my line.
I'm not asking you to be a tour guide, Steve.
I'm just asking you to keep an eye on her.
Her mother, Harriet Conover, was one of my dearest friends.
Well, frankly she spoiled the girl, but Dilys was the baby of the family Well, she doesn't look like a baby any more.
Wait a minute, haven't I read about some famous Conover jewels? Yes.
A matched pair of Burmese rubies worth a fortune.
Harriet bequeathed one to Dilys, one to Dilys' older sister Laura.
Yeah, and one of them was stolen recently.
Right, Laura's.
Just a few weeks ago, in San Francisco.
Now if Dilys has brought the other ruby to the islands, You'd better have a talk with her.
Governor, I've got to testify in that H.
P.
D.
lawsuit, I've got to give a deposition in the Miller Case, and I have to appear before League of Women Voters.
Just have a talk with her, Steve.
Tell her to be careful.
Consider it a favor to me.
You'll find she's a very attractive, though headstrong, young woman.
Yes, sir.
[PHONE RECEIVER THUDS.]
it's nonsense.
Nonsense.
Look, you are the law.
The law has my dog.
You give me back my dog, then we'll talk about the ruby.
I'm not here to make any trade offs.
Besides, the dog is not my department.
Are you going to tell me that a great big 180 pound officer can't do something about a little 4-pound yorkie? Ever hear of rabies? - Ever hear of fascism? - Yeah.
And fortunately, we don't have either one here.
Ms.
Conover, let's be serious for a moment.
If those rubies you and your sister inherited are worth a quarter of a million dollars each, and as a matched pair, they're easily worth a million.
Now a smart thief may come back for seconds.
If he does, you'll be the first person I scream at.
Save your voice.
Take a few precautions.
I have.
I'm not a fool, Mr.
McGarrett.
The ruby's in a safe place.
I only wear it when I'm dressed formally.
And frankly, I don't expect a lot of that over here.
- Slumming? - No.
Retreating.
I came over here to forget a very forgettable man.
All I expect to do is sunbathe, skin dive, and miss my dog.
You can always visit him.
Sure.
- Now if you'll excuse me.
- Of course.
Thank you.
EUDORA: She's made a beautiful adjustment.
Obviously, she has a very healthy self-image.
And her social skills are extraordinary.
I mean, she's already developed a meaningful relationship with Dudley.
Yes, I hope you're not letting it get too meaningful, Ms.
Finch.
Call me Eudora.
I like to think that they call me Eudora.
[DOGS BARKING.]
- You know each other.
- Yes.
We met at the airport.
He's so devoted.
He's been here every day to visit Dudley.
Poor baby, who knows, he's probably the victim of a broken home.
- Mr.
Clive? - Dudley.
- Good morning, Mr.
Clive.
CLIVE: Ms.
Eudora.
- Ms.
Conover.
Hi.
- Hello.
Dudley! Dudley! Oh, Dudley.
Hi.
Hi.
Snack time.
I don't like to tamper with their schedules, so if you'll excuse me.
- Is she for real? Ha, ha.
- Oh, she's sweet.
I suspect she thinks she's running a nursery, but she's sweet.
- Well, how's the vacation? - Oh, quiet.
Restful.
Not too restful, I hope.
That all depends on your standards, Mr.
Clive.
[CHUCKLES.]
And how are you doing without Daphne? DILYS: You remembered her name.
CLIVE: I remembered her mistress too.
Well, it seems that Dudley and Daphne have become fast friends.
Yeah, that it does.
You know, there's an old Hindustani saying that the, uh, master can learn from the dog, just as the dog learns from the master.
Really? And what does that sound like in Hindustani? I don't know.
But in English, it sounds like "How'd you like to have dinner with me tonight?" Okay.
[WHIMPERING.]
- Good morning, Danno.
- Good morning, Steve.
Since when did you start reading gossip columns.
Sometimes it pays.
You catch up with familiar people.
- Who, for instance? - The Governor's friend, Dilys Conover.
"Who's the hot-tempered stranger who's been secretly squiring heiress Dilys Conover all over the islands the last few days.
Whoever he is, he threw a mean punch at our photographer for trying to take their picture.
" That man does seem to like his privacy.
I wonder if he has something to hide.
- Shall I check him out? - Yeah, you'd better.
Especially since I promised the Governor I would.
You realize tomorrow is an anniversary? What? I'll be a week since we met.
- Oh, you are sentimental.
- You bet I am.
I think we should celebrate.
- How? - I don't know.
Let's get dressed up.
Make it a special evening.
Well, I really didn't bring over anything very dressy.
I'm sure you can think of something.
- Excuse me.
Here you go, sir.
- Thank you.
Nothing unusual, Steve.
Just like any ordinary couple.
Except for the hours they keep.
Schedule getting to you, Danno? Racketeers don't burn the candle the way these two do.
- Did Duke check out that car? - Yeah.
it's a rental.
Uh According to the agency, the man's name is Harry Clive.
He gave a permanent address in Bel Air California, and a temporary one here in Honolulu.
It's a house he's renting out in the Kohla area.
Wait a minute.
I've got an idea.
Why don't you pick up the check he handled, take it to the lab tonight, when they lift a few prints, have them put them on the wire to the bureau.
We can have a positive ID on Clive by morning.
Will do.
- Thank you very much.
- Thank you, sir.
Mei Lou.
You're just about to make a major contribution to law and order in Hawaii.
Hey, what about my tip? I guess you'll have to call me at the office.
[WHIRS.]
[DINGS.]
- Steve? McGARRETT: What've you got? Here's the story on those prints we sent to the bureau.
Harry Clive's real name is Howard Caine.
He's suspected of being one of the top society burglars on the mainland.
- What do you mean? - He never had a conviction.
They haven't been able to catch him with the goods.
You think he might be over here to try to match a pair of rubies? Could be, Danno.
Could be.
Which puts this whole Conover operation in a different light.
Let me see that.
Yeah.
[INTERCOM BUZZES.]
Yes, Mr.
McGarrett? Luana, get in touch with Captain Steve Mills, San Francisco Police Department.
See if he can come up with a mug shot of, uh, Howard Caine, also known as Harry Clive.
If so, I'd like him to show it to Dilys Conover's sister Laura.
She may not be in the phone book, but he can find her in the Social Register.
Right away.
Come on, Danno.
I've got an idea.
- How straight do we play it, Steve? - What do you mean? Do we tell Clive we know he's Howard Caine? No.
Let's give him enough rope and see if he'll hang himself.
He doesn't deny himself any luxuries, does he? McGARRETT: Well, if you're gonna play with the rich, you've gotta look rich.
[DOORBELL RINGS.]
Maybe we should've phoned ahead for an appointment.
A pretty messy housekeeper.
[DOORBELL RINGS.]
Let's try the back.
Boy, it looks like a twister went through this room.
Halt! You've gotta admit it's a switch.
Second-story man gets ransacked.
Maybe Clive did it himself.
Practicing his craft, huh.
[DANNY CHUCKLES.]
May I help you? - Mr.
Clive? - Yes.
McGarrett.
Hawaii Five-0.
My associate, Dan Williams.
You, uh, gentlemen seem a bit mature to be trainees.
- Beg your pardon? - This search.
If I were grading you on it, I might give you a Q minus if I felt charitable.
Mr.
Clive, we didn't do it.
And I must admit, we usually hear that from the other side of the desk.
Do you really expect me to believe that you didn't do it? Well, it would certainly move things along.
All right.
Consider them moved.
Now, uh, would you like to tell me what you're doing here? First, would you like to tell us what you're doing in Hawaii? [SCOFFS.]
A little business.
A little pleasure.
- What kind of business? CLIVE: I'm in imports.
- What kind of pleasure? - Whatever I can find.
How long have you known Dilys Conover? About a week.
Why? Well, from what we've heard, it's been a rather full week.
She's a very attractive lady.
But you know the laws better than I.
Is there a local ordinance against spending time with an attractive lady? Need I answer that? You're certain you have no idea who might have ransacked this room? Hmm, no, not the faintest.
Well, when you find out Oh, you'll be the first to know.
I don't think I'll hold my breath waiting for his call.
- Wanna put a tail on him? - Not now, Danno.
He'll be expecting it.
Uh, this is McGarrett.
Patch me through to the Five-0 office, please.
Are you gonna tell Ms.
Conover about Caine? No, not quite yet, Danno.
You haven't met the lady.
If you're gonna tangle with her, you better have all the ammunition you can muster.
LUANA [OVER RADIO.]
: Five-0.
Yeah, Luana.
Did San Francisco PD get a mug shot of Howard Caine? Yes, sin And they're showing it to Miss Conover's sister Good.
Get me Laura Conover's phone number in San Francisco.
As soon as I get back, I wanna call her.
McGARRETT [OVER PHONE.]
: Ms.
Conover are you telling me you haven 't looked at the picture yet? Why should I? Why should I care if Dilys is mixed up again with some riffraff? Let it be a lesson to her.
It could be a very expensive lesson, Ms.
Conover.
For both of you.
I'm not just concerned about your sister.
This may be an opportunity to recover your ruby.
Well, I don't suppose there's any harm in taking a second look.
He does look rather familiar.
No.
No, the man I'm thinking of was different.
- Different? how? - He looked older He was bald, and he had a grey moustache.
The moustache might've been a fake.
I really didn't tweak it, Mr.
McGarrett.
I didn't assume that you had.
Where did you meet the man you just mentioned? He came to my home, for a meeting of the Civic Purity League.
I formed it, you know.
Do you remember who brought him? He came on his own.
The meeting's open to anyone.
Anyone, that is, who has an interest in improving the moral climate here in San Francisco.
If it was Caine, he must've leaped at that invitation.
I don't suppose you were wearing the ruby on that occasion? Hardly.
It was in the safe, in the library.
When did you discover it was missing? A few days later.
When I came back from a weekend in the country.
Very well, Ms.
Conover.
Thank you.
By the way, is there anything you would like me to tell your sister? You can tell that supercilious, sanctimonious, insidious, insensitive, spoiled silly, slip of a simp, that if the devil had her hindmost I wouldn't lift a finger: She was the baby of the family A condition that still lingers in her soiled psyche, which is about the dankest place in the continent.
If I never see her again, I shall hold a celebration in my honor Have a good day, Ms.
Conover.
Boy, I've seen more family affection in a cage full of starving pythons.
No wonder Dilys is so cool about her sister losing the ruby.
You know, there may even be a better reason for her attitude, Danno.
You think Dilys was in on the heist? She knew Caine before? Who knows? She's such an obvious kook.
She's harder to read than a wet newspaper.
Come on, Danno.
I wanna check something.
Leaving? Oh! But he's just gotten over his separation anxieties about you.
Now he'll have separation anxieties about me.
And them.
Oh, poor Dudley.
Iddy-biddy-storm-tossed baby.
Well, sometimes these things can't be helped.
There was an illness in the family.
Nothing rabid? The two-legged family.
Oh! I see.
I was, uh, hoping to leave Honolulu tomorrow, Ms.
Eudora.
EUDORA: So quickly? That could be traumatic for Dudley.
I'll make it up to him, somehow.
[WHIMPERS.]
DANNY: how much are you gonna tell Ms.
Conover? McGARRETT: I think I'll tell her that her friend, Mr.
Clive, may be dangerous.
DANNY: That you know he's really Howard Caine? No.
If they are working together, that might be just enough to send them underground, Danno.
- Wait for me, will you? - Yeah.
Our manager, Ms.
Hughes, didn't tell me to expect a journalist, Mr.
Armitage.
- What kind of article are you writing? - Human interest.
You know, what the owners are like.
- Oh! - That sort of thing.
Well, our dogs come from some of the finest families.
Daphne, the yorkie, she belongs to an heiress.
I can't reveal names, you understand.
- Oh, and the poodle? - Mahomet? - Mm-hm.
- Mahomet, he belongs to a Sheik.
Actually the Sheik was very unhappy about the quarantine.
He tried to buy the islands to get around it.
Poor Mahomet.
I wonder what kind of values he'll grow up with.
What about the man who was leaving as I came in? - Oh! he belongs to Dudley.
- Oh.
Yes.
The gentleman is terribly devoted, - but I think there's a stability problem.
- What do you mean? Well, poor Dudley only arrived a week ago, and his owner's going to take him away tomorrow.
Poor baby.
it's so traumatic.
[DOGS BARKING.]
how dare you drag that dreary sister of mine into this.
How dare I? What does that mean? It means, I think you and Laura would make a lovely couple.
Mr.
and Mrs.
Clean.
You could help her with that purity league of hers.
You enjoy practicing your backhand on me? Why not? Are you so different than any other man? Let me get to the point, Ms.
Conover.
Your sister thinks that your friend, Mr.
Clive, may have been at her home in San Francisco a few days before her ruby was stolen.
My sister would say anything to spoil my vacation.
- You know, I think you would too.
- I'm not trying to spoil your vacation.
I just want it to be safe and pleasant.
Your concern overwhelms me.
Why is it so hard for you to accept a simple warning? Because you are implying that my judgment is no good.
I know when a man's in love with me.
I don't tell you how to catch crooks.
I do not expect you to tell me how to run my life.
Okay.
This is my office phone number, just in case you should ever need it.
It would be a pleasure to hear from you.
Thank you.
[RINGS.]
- Hello? - Well, hello there.
- Is there something wrong? - No.
Hello.
Just checking.
Are we still gonna dress for this evening? Of course.
Good.
I'm really looking forward to it.
Bye- bye .
[DOGS BARKING.]
- I think you better leave, Mr.
Armitage.
- Leave? I checked with the manager, Ms.
Hughes.
You are not a reporter.
I don't know what game you're playing.
Ms.
Finch, I have a confession to make.
Mr.
Clive may be Dudley's legal owner.
But, I'm his natural owner.
- Are you saying? - I was young.
Foolish.
I had no one to turn to.
Are you saying you let Mr.
Clive adopt Dudley? You understand.
And I've felt so alone, until now.
If I could just hold him.
Nuzzle him, just once.
I don't believe you, Mr.
Armitage.
- And, if you don't leave this instant-- - You'll do what I tell you to do.
I'm not afraid of you, Mr.
Armitage.
Furthermore, I intend to scream my head off-- ARMITAGE: Ah, too late.
One sound out of you.
Hmm.
You wouldn't.
I guess you would.
Better.
This is what we're gonna do.
[DOGS BARKING.]
EUDORA: Shh.
Shh.
Shh.
Shh.
It's all right, Moses.
Thank you.
Open the door.
- Get the dog in.
Let's go.
- Get in, Dudley.
Get in.
I never thought I'd say this, but I hope you bite him.
- If you hurt-- - You can have him back in an hour.
If you behave.
Count to ten before you move from there.
[CAR DOOR OPENS THEN CLOSES.]
[ENGINE REVS.]
One, two, four, six, eight, ten.
OFFICER: H.
P.
D.
This is Central.
EUDORA [OVER PHONE.]
: Officer this is Eudora Finch, of the Animal Quarantine Station.
I want to report a kidnapping.
Uh, name and description of the victim, please? EUDORA: His name is Dudley He is male.
He's three years old, sort of reddish brown.
Has big Hoppy ears.
Okay, that's, uh, Dudley, male, three years old, reddish brown - big floppy ears? EUDORA: Yes.
He weighs about 90 pounds and his eyes are very sad.
Just what're we talking about, ma'am.
EUDORA: One of my charges, of course.
A bloodhound.
Don 't you understand it's a dog-napping! I see.
EUDORA: And the culprit used a gun.
He even threatened to shoot Dudley if I didn't surrender to him.
Please.
Please.
Put your best men to work on this.
Immediately! Lady, let's start from the beginning.
[ENGINE REVS.]
[DUDLEY BARKING.]
ARMITAGE: Come on, boy.
Come.
Hey, Dudley! Come here, boy! Dudley! Come here! [RADIO CRACKLES.]
Williams.
OFFICER [OVER RADIO.]
: Uh, Williams, I don't know if it matters to you, but, uh, a dog was stolen from Animal Quarantine.
And it belonged to that guy you were checking on, uh, Harry Clive.
I have a full report here, if you wanna hear it.
But I hope you're sitting down.
CLIVE [SINGING.]
: When they begin the beguine It brings back a night Of tropical splendor It brings back a sound Of music so tender When they begin The beguine - You have anything against doors? - I told you tonight would be a special night.
Happy anniversary.
Guess what just showed up on the police blotter? Mr.
Clive's dog was stolen.
- His dog? - Yes- His bloodhound.
Somebody sprung him from the Quarantine kennel at gunpoint.
I think I've had this case, Danno.
Why would anyone go to all that trouble to steal a mutt? Well, heh, maybe somebody was lonely, ha, ha.
Uh, well, it must mean something, Steve.
Why? - Another call from the Governor? - Oh, boy.
CLIVE: Doesn't it worry you, to wear a ruby like this in public? Well, I didn't want to embarrass you.
But, it must be worth at least $20,000.
Even a bit more.
[KNOCKING ON DOOR.]
Come in.
You can put it right there.
Yes, sir.
So where are we having dinner tonight? - At Michelle's.
- Mm.
I got us a table by the water.
The moonlight will shine in your wine glass.
- Ah, you are romantic.
- Heh.
- Are you waiting for something? - My tip.
I'll settle for the ruby.
Um [DILYS SCOFFS.]
I knew this hotel had help trouble.
There.
And I hope it causes you as much aggravation as it's caused me.
Thank you.
Now you can do me one more favor.
Get me some towels.
Lots of them.
By the way, Ms.
Conover.
Any funny stuff, and your boyfriend here's gonna wind up without a head.
- You understand? - Yes, I understand.
Um This is a very critical moment of your life.
Is there any chance I could convince you that crime doesn't pay? [DOGS BARKING.]
EUDORA: And I called the police.
Oh, dear, I am in trouble.
No, no, on the contrary, you acted with intelligence and courage.
Can you describe him? Oh, well, he weighs about a 100 pounds, he has brindle coloring, and long ears.
No, no, no.
Not the dog, Ms.
Finch.
The man.
Armitage.
Oh.
Well, he had brown hair and freckles.
Lots of freckles.
McGARRETT: Hey, watch it.
EUDORA: Oh, ha, ha.
Hey, I think I know whose dog this is.
- Okay, girl.
Okay, honey.
EUDORA: Daphne! Armitage and the dog could be anywhere by now.
Danno, there has to be a reason that someone would risk a felony rap to steal a dog.
MAN [OVER RADIO.]
: Central calling Steve McGarrett.
Central calling Steve McGarrett.
Yeah.
McGarrett.
Go ahead.
OFFICER: Steve, H.
P.
D.
picked up the getaway truck.
Uh, from examination of the scene, it appears the hound made a clean getaway.
That'll cheer up Eudora.
- How did they figure that one out? - Uh, the tracks were clean.
A man's footprints, and paw prints leading away from the truck, and only a man's prints coming back.
Okay.
Put out an all points bulletin on the bloodhound.
[OVER RADIO.]
Yeah, and I don't want any comments.
Can you get me a good description of the mutt? He's a bloodhound, pal.
He's tawny, long-eared, you know? You know how bloodhounds look.
You've seen them all in those chain-gang pictures, haven't you? That's got to be Dudley.
[PHONE RINGS.]
Hold on a minute, Steve.
H.
P.
D.
DILYS [OVER PHONE.]
: This is Dilys Conover.
- I want to speak to Mr.
McGarrett.
- Yeah.
Just a minute, lady.
Uh, someone trying to reach you, Steve.
A, uh, Ms.
Conover.
Okay.
Patch her through.
McGarrett? McGARRETT [OVER PHONE.]
: Yes, Ms.
Conover? I suppose you know, there is only one possible reason that I would be calling you.
- Yes.
Something happened.
DILYS: Right.
- Someone stole your ruby.
DILYS: Right.
- Mr.
Clive.
- Wrong.
Uh Who did it? Well, how should I know.
He didn't sign my memory book.
McGARRETT: Could you give me a description of the man, Ms.
Conover? [SIGHS.]
He had brown hair, and freckles.
Lots of freckles.
Old Freckle face has had a busy day.
How about his age? DILYS: I don't know, uh, 30.
- Height? DILYS: Uh, five-ten and a half 5'11â.
- Weight? - A 165 pounds.
Uh, he said by the time I got through to you, ugh, you'd never catch him.
Okay, Ms.
Conover.
We'll get on it right away.
- Shall I check the airport? - Yeah, you better, Danno.
OFFICER [OVER RADIO.]
: Steve? This is McGarrett, again.
OFFICER: Yes.
Anything further? I've got another APB.
- Suspect's name is Armitage.
- Armitage? What kind of a dog is that, Steve? [CHUCKLES.]
Oh, it's not a dog this time.
Name: Armitage.
- Wait.
Hold it.
- Unh.
Unh.
Unh.
Now, what was that again? I said you sure are cool for somebody who's just lost a precious ruby.
Well, confession.
Freckles got himself a fake.
- But I thought you said-- - I know.
I couldn't tell you I was wearing a fake.
Not on our anniversary.
It's tacky.
Besides, McGarrett made me so nervous about the jewel.
- Well, thank heaven for McGarrett.
- Well, he's not so smart.
[DILYS GRUNTS.]
He thought that you are a thief.
- Me? Ha, ha.
- Heh, yeah.
- Dumb cop.
- Yeah, dumb cop.
There.
Well, unh, where is the, uh, real ruby? Close your eyes.
Don't peek.
Ta-da.
I would've never known the difference.
Yeah, I know.
And, McGarrett thought, well Dumb cop.
Close your eyes.
- What? - Close your eyes.
I've got something for you.
Okay.
- Don't peek.
- I won't.
- Just a second.
- Ha, ha.
[DILYS GRUNTS.]
Just so I can sleep tonight.
Why'd you steal that bloodhound? I don't know what you're talking about.
Let me know if anything turns up, chief.
I'd appreciate that.
Thank you.
Mr.
McGarrett.
Mr.
Armitage.
He was about to hop a flight for Hong Kong.
And he doesn't know what we're talking about.
He doesn't, huh? Hmm.
He doesn't know much about rubies, either.
Short course, Mr.
Armitage.
Nature doesn't make them this bright.
Or, this clean.
Even the best have what they call, inclusions.
But this is a very good imitation.
Then that daffy Dilys sent us all on a wild goose chase.
Sit down.
Two charges of armed robbery, transporting a person against her will, which is kidnapping.
It'd be a shame to spend the rest of your life in prison.
But a little friendly cooperation might help.
Okay.
I was a waiter for a catering service in San Francisco.
I was working a meeting one night at Laura Conover's house.
I happened to spot Harry Clive alone in the library studying the safe.
And a few days later, when Laura Conover's ruby was stolen, you decided Harry Clive was the man, huh? I started watching him.
When he booked the same flight to Hawaii as Dilys Conover, you bought a ticket too.
I suppose you figured you could get your hands on at least one of the rubies, and make a deal with Clive? That's about it.
Not quite.
What about that dog? [DUDLEY WHIMPERS.]
What's this? Oh.
Oh! Oh, okay.
Okay.
All right.
All right.
Oh, okay.
All right, fella.
- Okay, doggie.
Okay.
- Ha, ha.
That's enough.
I like you too.
I like you too.
Oh, dear, Mr.
Clive.
Oh, dear.
Oh, Ms.
Eudora, I told you yesterday that we might be leaving today.
Didn't I? That's just it.
You see, Dudley is Brace yourself.
He's gone.
Gone? You see, Mr.
Clive, he had a gun.
[CRYING.]
What're you talking about? Keep the faith, Mr.
Clive.
Our people are looking for him.
- So is Hawaii Five-0.
- Hawaii Five-0? That nice Mr.
McGarrett and his friend were down here - asking me all sorts of questions.
CLIVE: Oh.
Keep the faith.
Oh.
McGARRETT: Whoever put this lei around the dog's neck almost obstructed justice, Danno.
- The collar? - Yeah.
Hand me that ruby.
Now, if this is the fake one, look at this, couldn't that be the real one? The one Harry Clive stole from Laura Conover in San Francisco.
The problem law enforcement has had with Mr.
Clive is that they haven't been able to catch him with the loot.
Boy, it sure looks real to me.
This could be the most expensive dog collar in the world.
[PHONE RINGS.]
Five-O.
DILYS [OVER PHONE.]
: Give me McGarrett.
Hold on a minute.
Steve, it's Dilys the Dilly.
Sounds like she just woke up.
- Hello? - McGarrett, so help me, if you tell me "I told you so" - What's wrong? - Wrong? Harry Clive is a no good, dirty, lousy, creep.
That's what's wrong.
- And I want you to get him.
McGARRETT: Thank you.
Thank you, for the apology, Ms.
Conover.
Another lady.
[DUDLEY WHIMPERS.]
Where do you think you're going with that dog? Our Animal Quarantine Superintendent, Ms.
Hughes.
That dog is AWOL, McGarrett.
He should've been taken back to quarantine the moment he was found.
I'm sorry, Ms.
Hughes, but there's special circumstances in this case.
HUGHES: Rules are rules.
There are no special circumstances.
Not on my turf.
I need this dog to complete a criminal case.
Do I have to read The Revised Hawaii Statutes relating to animals? - Now, I'll take that leash.
- No, you won't.
Mr.
McGarrett, you have broken the law once already.
That dog goes back into quarantine.
If I, uh, oh-- I may make a suggestion, Ms.
Hughes.
HUGHES: how could you.
- I think you should allow them HUGHES: Let's just take the dog Now, listen.
Ms.
Finch, I don't care whether this man happens to be a policeman, or not.
He's not going to come in here and take over my authority.
Now, you can take that, you can show that to him, and you can stuff it, and that's that.
[IN LOVE VOICE.]
Now, stay.
For a second.
Stay.
Over here.
Come here.
Come here, Dudley.
Sit.
Sit.
[DUDLEY WHIMPERS.]
Stay.
Stay.
Stay.
Over there.
Eudora, will you please come and make him obey? Of course, Steve.
Now, Dudley, come on.
Come on.
Come on.
You get back where you were like a good little boy.
- She's something special.
- Yeah, she sure is.
Sit.
Good boy.
Now, this could prove dangerous, Eudora.
So be careful.
Steve, until Dudley is returned to quarantine, he's in my charge.
No matter what the danger to me.
[DUDLEY WHIMPERING.]
I don't know how you found me, but I am certainly glad you did.
Dudley, you have just earned us half a million dollars by bringing this back home.
McGARRETT: I don't think so, Mr.
Caine.
You're not gonna have a chance to fence that stone.
You're under arrest.
Book him, Danno.
Come on, Dudley.
Hey, Dudley, come on.
No, no, this way.
Dudley, come on.
I think we should have H.
P.
D.
cover that Kahlii affair, Danno.
[KNOCKING ON DOOR.]
- Can we come in? McGARRETT: Oh, of course.
Good morning, ladies.
Recovered from your nap the other night? Actually, that's the most restful time I've had on this vacation.
I just wanted to thank you for looking after me.
You did a wonderful job.
Don't thank me, thank the Governor for assigning me to this case.
Well, I guess this is Aloha.
My four-legged friends and I are flying home this afternoon.
Friends? Is that plural? My little Yorkie was just miserable without him, so with Eudora's help And the help of my boss, Ms.
Hughes, we arranged for Dilys to adopt Dudley.
At least, while his master's in jail.
I'm glad you're here, Ms.
Finch.
I have something for you.
On behalf of the State of Hawaii and Hawaii Five-0, may I present this certificate of merit for outstanding achievement and cooperation.
- For me? McGARRETT: For you.
Oh.
Thank you, Mr.
McGarrett.
I shall cherish it.
Oh.
I have something for you too, Mr.
McGarrett.
I'm sorry, we're not permitted to accept gifts.
You'll have to accept this one.
What is it? A summons? McGARRETT: Yeah.
It is.
It says that I broke Regulation 105 of the Animal Quarantine Code.
"Removing animal from quarantine station without permission," unquote.
Ms.
Finch, I did not remove the animal.
But you had Dudley in your possession.
And you did not return him.
Ignorance of the law is no excuse, Mr.
McGarrett.
Ms.
Finch, surely, in this case there are, extenuating circumstances? But, surely, Ms.
Finch, you could-- Uh-uh-uh.
Now you are tampering, Mr.
Williams.
Ms.
Finch, you're absolutely right.
Book me, Danno.
[LAUGHING.]