In Plain Sight Episode Scripts

N/A - Witsec Stepmother

- Hey.
Come over to my dad's place.
Let's cram for the history final.
- Isn't that, like, next Monday? - Yeah, but it's half the grade.
Oh, I just remembered.
I have to get my mom a birthday present.
She's picking me up this weekend.
- This place is super expensive.
Anyway, I though you were mad at her because she moved out.
- Oh, they just go through that stuff sometimes.
Anyway, it's her birthday.
I'm not gonna not get her a present.
So I better go.
See you later? - Later.
- I don't know.
They're kind of plain.
- Okay.
- Let me see the teardrops.
- Okay.
- Not those.
- Get on the ground now! Don't do anything stupid.
- Hey.
I'm here.
Your mother's pulling up now.
Our inspector said her flight was late.
- She's always late.
My wife's priorities are a bit skewed.
- Right, dad, 'cause she flew the plane.
- Oh, my God, sweetheart.
I'm so sorry.
I came as soon as I could.
Thank God you're all right.
What happened? - I don't know.
It was so fast.
These guys came in, And apparently - It's all right.
It's all right.
It's all right.
Did they catch the men who did this? - They're in custody, But they're part of a syndicate That have been robbing jewelry stores across the northeast.
- I'm sorry.
Who are you? - We're with the U.
Marshals service, ma'am.
I'm inspector Mann.
This is my partner inspector Shannon.
- Hi.
- Cindy, Sabrina has agreed to testify.
- I wasn't consulted about this.
- I signed off on it.
- You signed off on what? - If you had returned my calls - No, don't start with me on this.
- Okay, guys, guys, please.
Just try to stay calm, okay? Vince is already up to speed on this.
So why don't we all sit down, take a breath, And we can explain to you how this will work.
Look, we want to be candid with you.
Since Sabrina's agreed to testify, you're all in danger.
You'll all have to be moved.
You'll each be provided with a new identity.
You'll get assistance with new employment.
Sabrina will go to a new school.
- We appreciate that this is a lot to take in.
- And we understand you two were recently separated.
Is that right? Cindy? - Oh, I-I have a place in Manhattan.
We don't live together.
- Right now.
- That's okay.
You'll each get a monthly stipend, And we can arrange for you to live separately.
- What about my work? The foundation I created? - Any contact with your current life will have to cease.
- Immediately and for good.
- You're talking about our entire lives.
- We're talking about there being men out there Whose only job it is is to find your daughter And shut her up.
- So then our only option Is to completely uproot ourselves? - WITSEC is optional.
You can choose not to come.
- There must be some other alternatives.
- We can arrange for visitations, Though they're difficult and dangerous.
- How often would I get to see her? - I don't know.
We could push for once a month, but that's a best-case.
We choose a different city every month, And you'd each fly in for the visitation.
But we strongly urge you to come into the program with them.
We can't guarantee your safety otherwise.
- And unfortunately you need to decide quickly.
- How quickly? - Now would be good.
- We have no other choice, Cindy.
We can make this work.
- Oh, I've heard that before.
- Mom.
It's okay.
You don't have to come with us.
- But, sweetheart, once a month? We can't just see each other once a month.
- In two years, I'll be in college, So it's not like you'll see me more than once a month then.
- And, Cindy, Sabrina is gonna go to brown.
- I've got it.
You don't have to remind me That the entire burden for Sabrina's financial future-- - I didn't say that.
- Yes, you did.
- Guys! Please.
- I don't know what to do.
- So this weekend's Eli Becker's family reunion.
- Wait, that's actually something? I thought that was just an old WITSEC legend.
- Seriously, what hack at the d.
Approved an annual family reunion? - When you agree to testify Against the Colombian drug cartel, You buy a little leverage.
- Different city every year For the last ten years.
So this year's our turn.
But brace yourself, kids, 'cause, From what I hearing, they're all at each other's throats.
- Really? Nothing I enjoy more than a family That makes mine look like the Brady bunch.
Tell me there's an open bar.
- One additional problem.
- Love it.
Go on.
- Eli's brother Joshua needs an inspector.
- Salt Lake's a little shorthanded.
Couldn't really spare anyone, So you'll be his security blanket this weekend.
- Was it something I said? Like, "give me a terrible assignment"? - No.
No, no, wait.
I'm taking Sabrina to Chicago to see her mother today.
How am I supposed to revel in Marshall's misery From 1,000 miles away? - Sorry to blow your weekend.
- Visitations, reunions, I swear to God this place has gone soft.
I mean, what's next? A WITSEC sock hop? - Oh, my God.
Are you okay? - Mm.
I've been better.
Doctors say I've got a couple broken ribs.
- Scott, what the hell happened? - I was walking to my car, And these three guys came at me from behind, And they grabbed my wallet.
Took one look inside, And they figured they'd take their disappointment out on me.
- Three guys? - Well, it might have been two.
I had my back turned.
They kind of took me by surprise.
- Did you talk to the police? - Well, they're looking into it, but I don't know.
- In 1977, I would've paid anything to be a Kilbourne.
Their dad was always washing his wood-paneled wagon, A hose at the ready, the manicured lawn.
And their beautiful mom, off to practice her serve, Wore a green-tinted visor, a fresca on the dash.
- Oh, my God, Mary, I'm so glad you answered.
I'm at the hospital.
- Brandi.
Brandi, calm down.
Start at the beginning.
- Scott was mugged.
- What? Are you serious? - Yeah, they beat him pretty bad.
- Wow, say this for the guy, he sure knows How to keep his head down, stay out of trouble.
- Mary, He's really hurt.
Just do something.
- Like what? - Like, I don't know.
Catch the guys who did it.
- Look, Brandi, that's not even-- Okay, look, I can make a call, okay? - Thanks.
- Bye.
- Bye.
- People say, "you can't choose your family.
" What you can do is look beyond the DNA And redefine the word.
No one knows that better than I do.
Not even the Killbournes.
They split up in '82.
You ready? - Who's the foxy gen x-Er, breen? Sister or your stepmom? - Too soon to tell.
Her dad and I just started facebook poking.
Come on.
We got to go.
- I'll text you.
- What's the story with you and Jesse James? Sorry, who's the upstanding young gentleman With the tattoos? - Uh, Brian.
- How long have you and Brian been going out? - I don't know.
- Really? Well, it wasn't yesterday.
The guy had his tongue so far down your throat, Pretty sure you were splitting lunch.
- Gross.
- Sabrina, you know he can't know anything About anything, right? You got that? - I'm not brain-dead, Mary.
I mean, God, tell me another time.
- You know you love the sound of my voice.
Hand me your cell.
I'll make it your ringtone.
- Oh, yeah.
- Hi, sweetie.
- Hey.
- Hey.
Um, I have a problem.
Cindy is three weeks late with her child support, so - I don't understand.
You get a stipend.
How on earth are you short on cash? - Well, this isn't about me being short on cash.
We have a separation agreement, period.
She owes me a check.
- Right, but I explained the protocol.
You write a letter, I take the letter, It goes through the system.
- I sent three letters.
You're gonna see her today.
Just tell her to give me the check.
- It's not how it works, Vince, and, p.
, I'm not your go-between.
- Screw how it works.
I need you to get the check and put it in your pocket And give it to me when you bring back Sabrina.
How hard is this? - Do you talk to your wife like that? Big piece of the puzzle.
- Hi, honey.
Listen, have a great time, okay? And, you know, don't stay up all night watching movies.
You know how your mother likes to keep you up late.
- Dad, just--bye.
- Okay.
- Okay, now I get to tell you where we're going.
Exciting, right? Cubs, second city, deep-dish pizza.
- I hate baseball, I don't know what that second thing is, And I'm lactose intolerant.
- But we have your sunny disposition.
So there's that.
Since 1970, the federal Witness Protection program Has relocated thousands of witnesses-- Some criminal, some not-- To neighborhoods all across the country.
Every one of those individuals shares a unique attribute, Distinguishing them from the rest Of the general population.
And that is, somebody wants them dead.
- Leftover from getting my teeth done.
it's really strong, so take half.
- Thank God.
I feel like I've been trampled by a bull.
- Mm.
I know mixing pills with alcohol Isn't a great idea, but - No, I'm all right, really.
- Yeah? - Brandi, I wasn't mugged.
I'm in trouble.
- Oh, my God.
I should have given you the money when you asked for it.
I didn't know this would happen.
- No, hey, hey, hey, hey.
This is not your fault.
That was your money, and you already spent it.
I mean, I should never have come to you about this.
You know, I was--I was begging to get my ass kicked.
I'm the screwup here, okay? - Yeah.
Welcome to the club.
- Inspector Robinson? - You can call me Donald.
- Hi.
- This is Eli Becker.
- Nice to meet you.
Marshall Mann.
You want to check in with my chief? He's right in there.
Your sister Betty and her family are already At the hotel, along with your aunt and Uncle.
Joshua gets in later today, And I'll be his inspector.
- Josh is coming? - Yeah.
- God, I can't believe it.
We got in a huge fight At last year's family reunion.
- Well, maybe this is a chance for time to heal old wounds.
- You don't know my brother.
When we were kids, I drowned his g.
Joe in the toilet.
What does he do? He goes into my room with a pair of scissors, Cuts up a complete set of topps baseball cards, Mint-condition.
He still brings it up.
- Buddha said holding onto anger Is like grasping onto a hot coal To throw at someone else.
You're the one who gets burned.
- Huh.
I like that.
I'm gonna use it.
Ooh, nice fountain pen.
Can I see? - Sure.
- Ah.
Uh I think you are kind of a fall person.
It's a pen cozy.
- So it's your opinion that my pen needs a sweater? - Well, offices usually hike up the air.
Eli's cozy keeps the ink at just the right temperature So you never have to shake your pen.
It's my new venture.
What do you think? - It's unusual.
- Looking for investors.
Want to go wide, big.
"as seen on TV" big.
And if this isn't your thing, I got hundreds of ideas.
I'm a bit of an inventor.
- This is inspector Shannon again.
We're going on two hours At the meeting location with no contact.
Call me back asap.
- God, why are you freaking? Mom's just late.
It's, like, part of her genetic code or something.
- Sabrina, these visitations take weeks to coordinate.
Okay, allocating funds, hashing out the details, We leave nothing to chance.
The Marshall escorting your mother Should have called me with an update by now.
That's why I'm freaking.
- Whatevs.
- This stuff sounds scarier than it is.
- I said whatever.
- Huh.
You gonna eat your salad or what? - Ugh.
Hotel salad? It's probably got e.
Coli or something.
I'd prefer not to die before losing my virginity.
- I'd be more concerned about your thumbs falling off From all the speed-texting.
You'll wind up the one weird girl with eight fingers.
You'll never even make it to second base.
- Do you even know what second base is these days? - What do you mean, it changed? It can't change.
- Oh, yeah, it did.
Now it's-- - No, no, no, no, pretty sure I don't want to know.
Copy that.
Get up.
- What-- what's happening? - New York City office lost touch with their inspector.
- So, what? - There could be a breach.
- What does that even mean? - It means that, until we reestablish contact With your mother and the Marshall, You're officially on lockdown.
That means no calls, no texts, no tweets.
Come on.
Let's go.
- Hi, Joshua.
I'll be your WITSEC inspector.
Oh, sorry, you're on the phone.
Don't hang up on my account.
- Lost reception.
- Really? - Yeah, Albuquerque's got a top-notch champagne maker here.
- Gruet is a fantastic champagne.
If you want to go out there, though, I'll have to escort you.
- Oh, no need.
I'm having a few bottles sent over to the hotel.
Only way I'm gonna make it through this weekend Is if I down every last drop of it.
Ooh, I see you've scored one of my brother's pen cozies.
It's gonna be a hot item.
- Look, I won't pretend I understand this feud Between you and Eli.
- Let me tell you about me and Eli.
If mom and pop could have mounted His dirty diapers on the wall, They would have.
He gets mixed up In this international drug ring, And they still tell themselves He's working for the u.
- Parents' love is unconditional.
- Yeah, well, not a brother's.
I don't even know what I'm doing here.
I mean, I only came to these things Because of my parents.
They're dead now.
Well, after this, I'm done with Eli.
No matter how chilly my pen gets.
Want to see what's on? Hey, Sabrina, your mom's okay.
She's safe, really.
She'll be here any minute.
- I wish I could go back to that day and that jewelry store And just never walk in.
- Hey.
Look, there she is.
Can I help you? - Roberta Holt.
- Hi, sweetheart, I am so, so sorry.
- Oh, it's okay.
- Oh, you would not believe The day I've just had.
So sorry.
- Stop apologizing.
You're here.
- I missed my connection At Charles De Gaulle and then JFK.
And there was so much weather.
- No, we heard all about it.
Just--she was pretty worried, that's all.
- I said that I was sorry.
I have a very hectic schedule.
- So what should we do tomorrow? There's signs all over for this van Gogh exhibit.
That'd be kind of fun.
- Sabrina, sweetheart, I'm not gonna be able to stay all weekend.
- What? Why? - I have to be in Montreal tomorrow afternoon For this last-minute thing.
I tried everything to reschedule.
It just wasn't possible.
You have no idea - How sorry you are.
I get it.
- Maybe the hotel restaurant is still open, And we can catch up over dessert.
- You know, it's been a long day.
I'm actually kind of tired.
- Oh.
I understand.
- Mom, it's all right.
I'll just see you next month.
I'm gonna shower and go to bed.
- All right, sweetheart.
I'll see you in the morning Before I leave.
- Sure.
- Good.
Why don't we schedule another visit for next weekend? - Do you have any idea the kind of hoops we jump through To arrange these meetings? The logistics? The money? - What if I pay for it? - I'll talk to my boss.
- Thank you.
- Oh, and while we're alone, You're late with the child support.
Vince wants a check.
- Do me a favor, tell my husband that-- - No, no, no, this isn't study hall.
Okay, I'm not passing notes for you two.
Write a letter to him and mail it to the marshals.
- Okay, I'll write him a check.
- Cindy, you know you can't make the check out to Vince.
Make it out to the marshal service.
Just from now on, send the check on time.
- Fine.
What's going on with Sabrina's new look? That eye makeup--she looks like Adam Lambert's sister.
- Here's a thought.
Ask her yourself.
- Look, I don't know what you think of me, But I love Sabrina.
And I am doing my best.
- That's exactly what I think of you.
That this is you doing your best.
All right, look, I'm the last person who should be giving advice.
I'm not a mother, And the one I have isn't the kind You look to for life skills.
So how about this? If I see something going on with Sabrina You should be aware of, I'll let you know, okay? - Fine.
- Did you watch Jeopardy! Last week? It was college week.
- Mom, that is, like, so lame.
- Oh, come on, we love that show.
You always know all the answers.
- Yeah, well, I've been busy.
I have a hectic schedule.
- I promise this won't happen again.
- I'm sorry.
We have to go.
- We'll have a great time next month.
- Yeah.
- I love you so much.
- Hey.
God, my ears are bleeding.
How can you stand that? - Relax.
You're not my mother, Mary.
- I'm not? It must be the time change.
I get so addled.
Who am I again? Sabrina.
Are you okay? - Yeah.
Why wouldn't I be? - Your weekend with your mom Didn't really go as planned.
I mean, you didn't even get-- - I don't want to talk about it, okay? - So you called gruet, And they confirmed Josh ordering A delivery to the hotel? - Yeah, but my radar's still humming with these two.
- As in? - As in I won't be comfortable Till I make sure Joshua's merely disgruntled As opposed to a legitimate threat to a witness.
- What do you need? - Phone records'd be nice, Bank statements, anything that might help confirm Suspicious behavior.
- I got eight people in town for this reunion.
Joshua's story checks out, We can't go digging around just because he hates his brother.
Do me a favor.
Just keep an eye on him.
- Oh, my God, daddy! - Welcome home, honey.
- Are you kidding me? Oh, my God! - Oh, hey.
- This is for me? - This is for you.
It's brand-new, it's loaded, It's got anti-lock brakes, air bags, A satellite radio, everything.
- Oh, my God, I love it.
I love it.
Can I take it out? - Heck, yes.
- Yes.
- It's your car.
Take it out.
- Hey, it's me.
Guess what? My dad got me a new car.
I know, I know.
I can't believe it.
Yeah, it's a red Toyota corolla.
I know.
Okay, see you in 15.
- All right, honey, drive it safely.
It's your first time in there, and put on your seatbelt.
That's it.
- You're the best.
- Okay, I love you, honey.
- I love you.
- So, Vince, I got your check.
I'll bring you the funds tomorrow.
Should help you pay for that.
Did she say anything? - Yeah, she's writing you a letter.
Brace yourself for a lot of exclamation points.
- I'm used to that.
- Listen, Vince, it's probably none of my business, But do you really think bribery Is the best way to connect with Sabrina? - It's not bribery.
It's just since we've come to Albuquerque, Sabrina's been miserable.
- Right, well, she's 16.
I mean, she's fighting off hormones and insecurities With a whip and a chair.
Every time she looks in the mirror, Something's changed.
And on top of that, she's going through a divorce.
- And she was held hostage at gunpoint.
- I was getting to that.
- Okay.
She's going to brown in a couple of years.
I just--I just want to enjoy the time we have left.
That's all.
- Yeah, well, You're probably gonna have more than a couple of years.
Chances are, she's not going to brown.
I mean, not if some of her old classmates might be there.
- Which they definitely will.
- Then she definitely needs to stay in-state.
- It's gonna break her heart.
- Buying her a car won't put it back together.
- Look, I want her happy, all right? If she wants one of Saturn's rings, I will get it for her.
And like you said, it is none of your business.
- Hey.
- What's this? - Chicken soup.
For Scott.
- The guy was beaten to a pulp.
Want to punish him further? - Heated up.
Not to worry.
- Oh, in that case.
So He's here then? - Crashed in mom's old room.
- Brandi, saying what I'm about to say while you're armed With scalding liquid probably isn't my best move, But I'm tired.
- What? - Well, I spoke to a friend of mine at the police department.
They don't think Scott was mugged.
- No? - No.
My guess is he's gambling again, and the guys he owes Paid him a visit.
- Mary, you didn't tell your friend that, did you? - No, I didn't, but - Okay, good, 'cause, like you said, You don't really know for sure.
It's just a guess.
- Yeah, right.
Right, well, I gave him a shot.
My world, one strike, you're out.
- He's our brother.
- He's also apparently a danger magnet, Brandi.
What happens when one of these guys Comes after you to get to him? - So, what, Mary, He's only half-related, So you only half-care if he lives or dies? - Who says I even care half? - Wow.
- Hello.
What? Shoplifting? Did you call the police? Okay, I'm on my way.
We're not done with this.
you're in WITSEC for a reason.
How do you not get why shoplifting is a bad idea? - I wasn't shoplifting.
I told you, I was just going outside for a minute.
I couldn't get cell reception.
I wasn't gonna steal anything.
- No, it makes total sense.
Sometimes when I'm searching for a signal, I tuck three shirts into my waistband too.
- Look, the lady let me off, okay? So just ease up on the drama, Cleopatra.
- Hey! This is not a game, Sabrina.
People want you dead.
Okay, if you get arrested, You lose any and all protection from us.
Is that what you want? - Sabrina.
- Great.
- Mary, thanks for dealing with that.
- Let me explain something to you.
I'm Sabrina's WITSEC inspector.
I'm not her mommy, I'm not her nanny, I'm not her fairy godmother.
My job is to protect her From people who want to cut her ungainly, sarcastic Teen years short.
That's it.
You're her dad.
You buy the groceries.
You lay down the law.
And, oh, yeah, you teach her to behave like, You know, a human.
- Look, I'm sorry.
I don't know why she called you instead of me.
- Because she needs discipline, Even if she doesn't know she needs it.
She wants to get a rise out of somebody, anybody.
It shows they give a damn.
- Well, I give a damn.
Of course, I give a damn.
I'm her father.
- Then act like it.
Ground her.
Take away the car.
Do something.
Put her in line, Vince.
Grow a pair.
- Betty, I love your new haircut.
- I wanted to look my best for the reunion.
- We made the semifinals in divisional basketball-- - What are you doing here? - Well, Sabrina's mom screwed the pooch, Showed up four hours late and cut the weekend short.
So sad for them.
So sweet for me.
Free food, fights, Food fights.
- You're actually hoping For violence? - I'm not hoping.
- I don't know what to do about him.
He said three words to me so far.
- What were they? - Pass the bread.
- See, that's a good sign.
You're breaking bread together.
Even among the Neanderthals, if you-- No, you know, Marshall, you're right.
It's like they say in my entrepreneur class, "never take no for an answer.
" - Exactly.
Send over a glass of wine.
And better yet, bring it yourself.
Toast your wonderful family.
- Thanks.
Don't forget about the opportunity I mentioned, Eli's cozies, right? You can get in on the ground floor.
- Huh.
Eli's cozies.
- Thinking about it.
Let's go back to the party.
- We're at the party.
- I just--I think I feel more comfortable With everybody else around, okay? - Will you take it easy? - Brian.
I said no.
Come here.
I'm going home.
- In my car? - I mean it.
- Slow your roll.
I'll take you home.
- How many times do I have to say I'm sorry? What, do you want me to slit my wrists and bleed out? - Let me get a knife.
- Let's all keep calm.
No knives.
No cutlery of any sort.
- You ruined me, Eli.
You did.
Like a jerk, I invested my life savings In your ridiculous schemes.
The coffee table book With the celebrities sitting on the bed? - Yeah, it was a good idea.
- As if celebrities are gonna let you, Eli, Into their bedroom.
- Fellas.
- No, no, no.
It's not funny.
This guy is nuts.
I lost a three-bedroom house, My wife left me, and then, as if that's not enough, He gets mixed up with drug dealers, and I have to live In an efficiency in a town Where you can't even get a drink on a Sunday.
- Okay! Okay! Mom and pop were right-- - Go ahead.
Tell me I'm a loser.
- You said that.
I didn't.
Excuse me if the shoe fits.
- First punch thrown, last punch thrown, Time to call it a night.
- Thought you were rooting for a fight.
- I was in theory.
- Get off.
Aunt Phyllis, good night.
Uncle Henry.
Good night, Betty.
- Guess I'll be escorting my witness Back to his room.
- I guess I'll be escorting these meatballs To a secure location.
- You ready? Just want to get back to my room.
- Can I borrow your phone for a second? I don't have any bars.
- Yeah, sure.
- Just have to call my date And tell her I'll be late.
- It's Stan.
- Stephanie, hey, It's me, Marshall.
I'm running a little behind.
- Marshall? - Yeah, don't call me back on this phone.
I borrowed it from my friend Josh, 'cause I have no service.
It shouldn't be much longer.
- Got it.
I'll run the last calls From the phone you're on now.
- Perfect.
See you later, hon.
- No problem Sweetheart.
- Yeah.
- What are you doing? What are we doing? - I just--I'm not ready to go home yet.
- Brian, stop.
Brian! No! - Come on.
You know you like me.
- Yeah, just like I know I'm ready to go home, okay? - Come on.
Just a little bit.
- Don't! Stop! Ah.
- Mary! Mary, help me! - Hey, Sabrina, I'm here.
I'm at the field.
Are you okay? - Oh, my God, thank you so much for coming.
You were so right about Brian.
- How much have you had to drink? - What? - How much have you had to drink? - I don't know.
We were doing jell-o shots.
Maybe three.
No big.
- Big, yes, big.
You're 16.
Okay, look, you could have gotten hurt.
- What? - Turn around.
Turn around.
Put your hands behind your back.
- What are you even talking about? - It's illegal to drink before you're 21.
Turn around, or I do it for you.
- What? - Fine.
- Ow.
- Come on.
- Ah, the peculiar dynamic of brothers.
The lord loves Abel more, So Cain has to kill him.
Only in our version, Eli's doing what he can To right a terrible wrong, And Joshua just can't let it go.
- And now that his parents are dead, He feels free to get revenge.
- definitely possible.
- Mary, what the-- - Drunk and 16.
Read the rulebook.
Ball's over, Cinderella.
- Our guys in el Paso traced a message From Joshua's cell phone To a number in Colombia.
They haven't unscrambled the message yet, But a number in Colombia isn't a good sign.
- If there's even a whiff of him exposing Eli's whereabouts - Donald, get Eli in his room.
No one comes in.
I'm on my way.
Have the detail secure everyone else.
- You should be arresting Brian.
He was trying to get in my pants, And he's driving drunk.
Trust me, if he were in front of me right now, Getting arrested would be the least of his worries, But he's not in front of me.
You are.
- You said when I'm in trouble, I'm supposed to call you.
But you're just like them.
You don't listen ever.
- You're a smart girl, Sabrina, you really are.
You get good grades, use your words well, You're throwing Cleopatra's name around Like she's in your gym class, for God's sakes, but right now, This stuff, all you're really doing Is setting fires and expecting the rest of us To read smoke signals.
- Mary.
- If you miss your mother, Sabrina, just say so.
- Vince is on his way in.
I called him and told him you just frog-marched His daughter in here.
- I am this close to turning her over to the cops.
And I would if I thought it would knock some sense into her.
- You don't think you've left the plantation on this one Just a little bit? - Stan.
- Teenagers drink.
It's rebellion 101.
- You know how people are always going on about a cry for help, And I always roll my eyes? - You're not her mother, Mary.
- No.
So she said.
But right now, I'm what she's got.
- I don't understand.
What's happening? - I hate to be the one to tell you, But we believe your brother leaked Your location to the wrong people.
We have to get you and your family out of here.
- I've tried everything, everything I know To make it up to him.
- Whoa.
- Can I get a minute, please? I'd like to speak to my brother.
- That's against protocol.
- I know.
I get all that.
I'm never gonna see him again.
- Two minutes.
- Joshua.
I'm sorry I ruined your life.
It wasn't my intention, But it was my fault.
- Too little, too late.
- If the roles were reversed, I would still have taken a bullet for you.
- My two cents, I honestly think he would have.
Something you might want to think about in prison.
- Your dad's on his way, Sabrina.
- Sabrina.
- It's my fault.
This whole thing, if it hadn't happened, My mom and dad would have gotten back together.
- No, they wouldn't.
I don't know a lot about relationships Or how they work or what they look like when they do, But I am an expert on what they look like when they don't.
Okay, and your parents, as much as you love them, As a unit, they don't work.
Okay, I can tell you that.
My parents split up too.
- They did? - Yes.
And I spent a lot of time Wishing my dad would come home.
I used to think about the night he left.
You know, I should have told him how much I loved him, How much I wanted him to stay.
I used to think-- I was sure of it-- That if I had, he would have.
But my dad left because he didn't want to be with my mom.
I'm glad he didn't stick around for me.
I'm here to help you, Sabrina.
Okay? Tell me what you need.
- Can I call my mom? - I'll get a secure line.
- My flight leaves in an hour.
We couldn't do this over the phone? I had to fly all the way to Detroit? - Right, 'cause what I wanted Was to get back on the plane too.
Look, this is neutral ground.
It was the only way I could look you both in the eye, got it? Here's the thing.
I'm not a parent.
Okay, I don't have any experience with kids.
I didn't even like kids when I was a kid.
And I'm for sure not a marriage counselor.
I mean, you two start tearing each other's hair out, I'm liable to sell tickets and popcorn.
But my witness is in trouble.
Her father gives her whatever she wants Just to keep her happy, and her mother's too caught up On her blackberry to even notice she's got a tongue ring.
- She has a tongue ring? - No.
But you shouldn't have to ask the question.
People, make some concessions.
Cindy, make Sabrina know she's a priority.
That's what parenting's about.
- I hear you.
Okay, I do.
And maybe I can stop scheduling meetings on visitation weekends.
- Gee, that's a genius idea.
- Hey.
- I'm--I'm sorry.
I really am sorry.
- I know that this is hard for you, I do.
But maybe one of these days, you'll be able to admit That not everything is my fault.
- I know.
It'sIt's the idea of letting her go, It's--it's terrifying.
- You love her.
- We both do.
- Good.
One more thing, I'm not a telephone.
From now on, the two of you need to suck it up And communicate without me.
I know the system we have is difficult, But we do the best we can.
Now it's your turn.
- Hey.
You look better.
- Really? - No, actually.
Your bruises are making me nauseous.
- Well, I've been putting on That Arnica stuff that you gave me.
I thought that it was helping.
- It is.
A green face is much better than a purple face.
So you asked me to come by, But I kind of thought Mary didn't want me around.
- She doesn't know you're here.
I want to give you something.
I lied before when I said I couldn't get the money.
And if I had known this would happen, I would have just given it to you when you'd asked for it.
- And you know what the money's for, And you still want to do this? - At some point, Scott, you're gonna get better.
You're gonna be the kind of brother that I can trust.
But that's never gonna happen If you're found dead in an alley, so Take it.
- So? - Kaput.
Our eyes have seen the glory of the final family reunion.
- D.
Tends to frown on hit men coming into play, But they're sticklers.
- How's Sabrina? - Pain-in-the-ass teen with pain-in-the-ass parents.
Better, I guess.
The threshold for better's pretty low with these people.
- So you're saying you're gonna hang out a shingle As a family counselor? - Yeah, right.
I'd rather watch Stan belly dance.
- Where are you going? - Pick something up.
What's that? - What? - What is that? On your pen? - It's a cozy.
- Oh.
- It's really comfortable.
- Marshall, for your own good, Give me the cozy.
Come on, pal.
It's for the best.
Winston Churchill famously said That democracy is the worst form of government Except for all the others.
The same goes for family.
Or as we'd say on our side of the pond, "nobody picks on my brother but me.
" - Mary.
What are you doing here? - Well, I heard your dad took your car away.
I figured you might need a lift.
- Yeah, he said until I start behaving Like a responsible young woman, I'm not allowed to drive.
- Well, if you keep on the track you've been on lately, I'm sure you'll get your wheels back soon.
- Wheels? - No.
- What are you, like a bajillion years old? - All right.
Pride and prejudice.
- Mom sent it.
She said it was her favorite book When she was my age.
I'm already halfway done.
- Huh.
How's your boyfriend? - Ugh.
No longer my boyfriend.
He's such a loser.
You want to bounce? - Yeah, let's bounce in a minute.
I just want to--I just want to take care of one thing.
You want to wait for me at the car? - Oh, yeah, sure.
- Cool.
Hey, Brian, got a sec? - What up, gen x? - What up is you think you're a badass.
But I want to break it down for you.
If you touch, talk, or so much as accidentally glance At Sabrina, I will find you.
I will hunt you down like a lioness looking for dinner.
I will haunt you in your dreams till you wake up In your little racecar bed with your transformers sheets Soaked through.
Have a nice day.
Spilt apart, reunited, Or adjusting to new conditions on the ground, Family is a double-edged sword.
They are the best of times, the worst of times, Your keys to the kingdom And the skeletons in your closet.
If only we didn't have to eat dinner with 'em.