Lois and Clark: The New Adventures of Superman s03e03 Episode Script
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Stop.
Stop.
Hit the button.
Lois? That must have been painful.
Super-- Super-- Hey, hey, could you turn this thing off? -You all right? -Yeah.
I don't have to do the treadmill at the gym today.
I'll take them to the police.
I'll be back to see you home.
-oh, you don't have to do that.
-Lois-- Superman-- It's gonna be dark soon.
I would feel much better if you let me take you home.
Clark, I've driven home alone as long as you've known me and two million times before that.
I'll be fine.
-But-- -I admit, ever since I figured out I've taken more chances because I knew you'd be there.
But I am not a 6-year-old.
I can cross the street fine.
Wear your seat belt.
-Girlfriend problems? -Don't get me started.
Don't tell me.
You live here? This is so cool.
Lois Lane, right? Daily Planet? That must be a great place to work.
I don't have a subscription, but I love that logo.
I' m your new neighbor, Star.
Hi.
Jeez, it's not often I meet people who recognize me.
oh, I didn't.
No.
I've never seen you before in my life.
Not even in pictures.
If you were a snake, you could've bit me.
-So, what are you, psychic? -Yeah.
You too? -No.
How did you know my name? -I got it off of your valise.
I do psychic counseling and channeling.
Don't worry, I'm really quiet.
occasionally, I do hypnosis and taroting, crystal healings.
Never any of the dark stuff.
T oo scary.
I'm a Pisces.
Well, at least I am in this lifetime.
Was a Taurus once, was that bad.
Did you just come off a story? You look really whipped.
-Yeah, just out on a story.
-Wait a minute.
Wait a minute.
You really don't need to close your eyes, but most people expect it.
I'm getting-- I'm seeing something more than a story happened to you tonight.
No.
No, just a boring old story.
Nothing to get your brain scanned over.
I like to keep my brain private.
oh, I'm not prying.
I mean, your brain is practically shouting.
-lt is? -Let me see.
You were buying groceries and met Mel Gibson.
No, that's not it.
-You went for a drive and stopped-- -Yes? --at a tiny little diner, and ordered breakfast even though it was at night.
Mel Gibson sat down next to you.
No.
okay, you can tell where my mind's at.
Gee, you are tough.
I know.
I know.
I know, you were abducted by aliens.
Yes.
That's amazing.
How did you know that? I always know.
And then there was this blinding white light and I had sort of a floaty feeling.
And I have this vague, hazy memory of creatures.
And then, it was 6 a.
m.
and I was back in my car -and almost 1 1 hours had gone by.
-That must have been terrifying.
That doesn't even begin to describe it.
You don't have to talk about this if you don't want to.
oh, no.
Actually, it feels really good to talk to somebody.
It would just be too weird not to.
-More tea.
-Thanks.
I have to admit that when I met you downstairs I thought you were a little flaky, you know? But you really are-- I'm just touched by how understanding and down-to-earth you are.
Who knows? Maybe we were friends in an earlier life.
-Maybe.
-Do you remember anything else? No.
No, not really.
Just that they had these really large heads and slimy skin and their hands looked like ours.
I thought you were gonna describe these guys I know from the Pleiades -but, no, these guys sound different.
-The Pleiades? or Cassiopeians.
I mean, those guys.
Faster-than-light travel, cities that float and no indoor plumbing.
You gotta love it.
So you've been to where they live? Not physically.
Astrally, dozens of times.
Gee, look at the time.
I hate to do this, but I really have to get dressed for work.
No problem.
I still got some moving to do.
-Gemini, right? -Libra.
I knew it.
So I see you made it home safely last night.
Yeah.
-You want some Danish? -Yeah.
-Lois, are you mad at me? -No.
Because-- Look, I'm sorry.
It's just-- I worry about you.
Even more than I used to.
-Clark, last night-- -Lois.
Clark told me how you two cracked that luggage-theft story out at the airport.
Ride them, cowgirl.
Can't wait to see that copy on my desk.
Say, half an hour? -Perry? -He's been on a tear all morning.
He just started boxing lessons.
He's all pumped up.
I think he caught Alice checking out a waiter the other night.
-Star? -I had a flash after you left for work.
I knew you left because I can see who comes and goes from the window.
Maybe you'd like to read these books.
They're all about alien abduction.
Maybe you can get a clue about the guys who took you last night.
And if you only have time to read one, read this one.
It's by Dr.
Martin Solsvig.
He's the world's leading authority on alien abductions.
He lives right here in Metropolis.
Sorry to interrupt.
Cinnamon apple? -Yeah.
-I knew it.
I knew it.
If you want some entertainment, turn on the TV.
-Lois, did something happen last night? -No.
Nothing.
Sort of.
No, just my car stalled, and a big white light engulfed me.
I saw some aliens and I woke up in my front seat 1 1 hours later and it felt like two minutes.
-Did I mention floating? -You saw aliens? Krypton is not the only other planet in the universe with intelligent life.
I didn't say that.
I'm just saying that-- Scotty, stand by to beam me up.
Go ahead, laugh.
Make fun of me.
I'm not an idiot.
You don't think I've asked myself a thousand times if this really happened? Well, it really did.
Look, Lois, I apologize.
obviously, something has upset you.
Now, I don't know what it is, but I do know you and you wouldn't lie at least to me, most of the time.
So why don't we just forget about the airport story for now? Yeah.
You can turn it in later.
Now, whatever happened I want you and Clark to get to the bottom of it, now.
Spend whatever you need.
Are you feeling okay? Well, I just gotta keep those boys over there in Accounting on their toes.
Hey, that's a nice hairdo, Tinker Bell.
All right, you two, git.
Look out.
The death ray.
Don't worry, Princess Cleavage.
I will protect you.
So, Martin, what can I do for you today? My dress is on fire.
I guess I'll have to just take this off.
I don't know.
You sent for me.
-No.
You called me.
-Right.
Why did I call you? Could it be because of the Super Microwave Transmitter? The project you've been working on for six months? You know, if we microwave, they will come? Right.
Right.
our attempt to contact alien civilization.
I'm sorry, I'm trying to remember where I left my glasses.
Much better.
Now, let's see.
oh, yes, I received your new program.
We loaded it into the computer.
But, and I mention this in my memo we still have two problems we must solve before we can reach your goals.
-Stand by, anti-boredom ray.
-First they are not near what I had at NASA.
Those were from Zenith Chip, far above anything commercially available.
our chips just don't match them.
And two, we need a stronger pulse amplifier.
Unfortunately, one doesn't exist.
Do not worry about it.
I am Bob, Master of the Universe.
I own a $70 billion software company.
I can do anything I want.
-You will have your chips and amplifiers.
-Thank you, Bob.
-Has he figured it out yet? -Not a clue.
He still thinks this is a hobby of mine albeit a really expensive one.
For the past few years Nanoware's profits have been limited by trade barriers overseas.
But since negotiations have failed, that leaves us no choice but to make our money another way.
In two minutes, the empire begins to strike back.
-What? -Nothing.
Don't give me that look.
I know what you're thinking.
You're thinking I should've waited for you.
No, I'm not.
Clark, you cannot control everything.
We're both rational, thinking adults.
Sometimes I'm gonna do something that you disagree with.
That is what worries me.
Security system disarmed.
-So, what are we looking for? -I don't know.
Some sort of landing site or scorch marks.
A picture of them at Disney World.
Anything that looks like a UFo might've been here.
oh, hey.
Can you go left? I think that's where it happened.
-over there.
-Y es, ma'am.
All right, everybody, put your hands up.
You, get out of here.
Go.
-You, come here.
Go over there.
-No problem.
Stay calm and nobody gets hurt.
Got it? Come on.
Come on.
Let's go.
Get it in there.
All units in the vicinity of Fortnum and Mason we have a 2 15 silent alarm at Zenith Chip Corporation.
.
Robbery in progress.
-We have to go down.
T ake us down.
Lois.
C.
K.
It's all right, Lois.
I've got you.
-Lois, are you all right? -l' m fine.
Stay here.
I'll be right back.
I have to go stop a robbery.
Lois? Lois, look at me.
Clark? What happened? What am I doing here? You jumped out of the helicopter and I saved you.
Don't you remember? No.
Really? Yes, really.
And when we' re in public, you have to call me Superman.
Superman.
Thank God.
Lois, I thought you were a goner.
Where's Clark? You caught Clark, didn't you? Yeah, he's fine.
Lucky I heard him shouting.
He went to the control tower to let everybody know everything's okay.
Man, Lois, you looked like Greg Louganis.
Right out the door.
I must have slipped.
Jimmy, you go get Lois' car.
You've had enough flying for one day.
Sure thing.
I think we ought to have a little conversation with Dr.
Solsvig.
Everything went perfectly.
Superman was completely distracted.
He never made it to the robbery.
Give this to Solsvig.
He'll be overjoyed.
At 3:00, if everything continues as planned he'll have his pulse amplifier too.
And I will become Bob, Ruler of Everything and I will crush everyone who has thwarted me in the past.
Hypnosis.
I'm not really comfortable with that idea.
Please.
It's the best way to determine if what you experienced actually happened.
I'd be very happy to arrange a session, if you like.
I don't know.
What if I said something that I didn't want to get out? Well, then it would be out.
Now excuse me if I seem so excited but I've spent my entire life trying to contact alien civilizations.
So soon I will complete my Super Microwave Transmitter.
But until then, talking to people who've had your experience -is about as close as I'll ever get.
-There's always Superman.
Yes.
A one of a kind, so unlike any other alien ever reported.
Love to talk to him.
I had an unusual experience since.
You know.
Really? Like what? Well, this morning, I went into a trance for a brief period.
Perfectly natural.
Many people report enhanced paranormal abilities others, bizarre behavior.
Have you ever heard of a person putting themselves in jeopardy after an abduction? No.
That would be unusual.
Well, thank you for your time.
My time is space-time.
Physicist's joke.
Lois Lane and Clark Kent, am I right? The two most famous reporters in America.
Mr.
Fences, I know we haven't met.
I have the strangest feeling we have.
Well, I've been on the news a lot recently.
Yeah.
I read your article on trade barriers.
You seemed rather adamant.
Well, unfair trade barriers are the bane of U.
S.
business overseas.
And if negotiations fail, I believe that we should go to war.
Metaphorically speaking.
The thing I don't understand is, what would you jumping out of a helicopter -have to do with aliens? -I haven't the faintest.
In Close Encounters, Richard Dreyfuss was drawn to the mountain.
What could have been drawing you? The ground? It just doesn't make any sense.
Lucky I was there, though.
That is my nightmare.
You're gonna get in trouble and I'm not gonna be there.
-That's why when you-- -Hey, get out of the street.
Lois? Lois, it's me, Clark.
-lt happened again, didn't it? -Come on, I'll drive you home.
Unbelievable.
See you next week, Mr.
Schaffenberger.
That's Mr.
Schaffenberger.
He got hit by lightning and thinks he's Ben Franklin.
I'm helping him reach Thomas Jefferson.
They're working on a revision of the Declaration of lndependence.
I'd love to chat, but I gotta get ready for my next appointment.
Maybe you're not the only alien on the planet.
-She seems goodhearted.
-Actually, she is.
That's what's so odd.
Where're you going? I thought with everything that's going on right now, you wouldn't wanna be alone.
I appreciate your concern, but I'll be fine.
-How do you know? -I know.
So go.
You can't babysit me 24 hours a day.
other people need you too.
okay.
Get this: "Some abductees report an increase in their ability in psychic communication, either in reading thoughts or having their own thoughts read.
" Star.
What if she found out about Clark? "A few individuals stated that the only way they could prevent their thoughts from being perceived by others was to wear a skull cap of aluminum foil.
" Can you believe this? What am I doing? I' m talking to fish.
Hey.
Hey, don't turn away from me like that.
Lois? It's me, Star.
I brought you some ice cream.
It's choco chocolate monster chips with jelly bean bits.
I'll be right there.
You know, I just had the funniest feeling.
A little voice said, "Lois wants ice cream.
" Fish ice cream.
I didn't have any of that, so I brought this instead.
What's that on your head? It's just that Clark's such a worrywart.
He thinks I'm always putting myself in danger.
-Well, are you? -No.
Not all the time.
You can't be a great reporter without taking some risks.
And that's the only thing that keeps the two of you apart? Yeah.
Y eah, that and, you know, one or two other things.
Some of which might be my problems.
The biggest of which is that it scares me, the idea of committing to a relationship for life.
Don't you think he's scared too? -Yeah.
-But you two love each other? I mean it's not like you think you're gonna wake up one morning and find out that he shaved his head and tattooed the entire third act of Henry IV on it and then just gone off to live in some commune in Brazil where they worship a giant butterfly named Fred and then two years later, he sends you a note and says he can't come back because he's allergic to psychics, is it? oops, sorry.
-But you two love each other, right? -Yeah.
My parents loved each other, and they got divorced.
Well, you' re not your parents any more than they' re you.
Lois, what you want is a guaranteed, risk-free, happy-ever-after relationship.
There just is no such thing.
-It's scary.
-Lois if you're willing to risk your life for work why not risk your life for love? -I hate alarm clocks.
-It's the phone, Jonathan.
-Hello? -Hi, Mom.
Clark? Is everything all right? Y eah, fine.
I had to stop a mudslide in Chile, you know.
How is Lois? Well, that's actually the reason l' m calling.
Is this a father-son talk? You want me to butt out of this? No, Mom, it's not that kind of conversation at all.
It's-- Sometimes I feel like maybe Lois and l shouldn't be together.
Clark, did you two have a fight? No.
It's just-- It's Lois.
I'm worried that-- -I'm worried I'm a jinx.
-A jinx? Well, yeah, let's face it.
Ever since she's known me, she's been kidnapped pushed off buildings, poisoned, almost buried alive and who knows what else and it's all basically because of me.
-Have you talked to Lois about this? -Sort of.
It's just-- It's kind of uncomfortable.
We never seem to get very far.
Honey, loving a person means having the courage to talk about something even when it is uncomfortable.
You've gotta talk to her some more about this.
Communication is key.
I guess.
No matter how much you love somebody you can 't protect them from the evil in the world.
Even if you are Superman.
And don't forget, honey.
Lois knows what it means to be involved with you.
It's her choice too.
She's not a 6-year-old.
Clark? Clark, wake up.
It's me.
And she's here.
I'll talk to you guys later.
I love you.
Bye.
Clark? Clark, I remember.
I was kidnapped by aliens.
I had a flashback.
They had these big, bulging heads and they'd snatched these other people.
They had these thingamajigs over their mouths and-- -It's okay.
You're here.
It's okay.
-They had this big mechanical arm and it came over me, and it had a big needle and it was sticking in my neck and I was screaming and screaming.
I was screaming, and you weren't there.
It's okay.
It's okay.
I should have never let you go home alone, anyway.
-It's not your fault.
-But I feel responsible.
-Well, you shouldn't.
-Sure I should, Lois.
I love you.
And that's what makes it so difficult.
Every single time I'm off catching some bad guy, I can't help but think "ls Lois okay, or is she slowly being boiled in oil? " Really? And what I cannot stand is the idea that the closer we get, the more at risk you are.
-That's not true.
-okay, okay.
Let's just say, for argument's sake that you were kidnapped by aliens.
It's probably a lucky thing.
Because what if it had been any ordinary earthbound criminal and when you were drugged, you let slip that Clark Kent is Superman? Everybody knows that you and I are an item.
And to get to Superman, they would do anything to you.
-But that's a worst-case scenario.
-Who could predict you'd be kidnapped -by aliens? -What should I do? -Pretend I don't know you? -No.
What I'm saying is it's hard.
It's just hard.
It's harder than I ever thought it would be.
We can make it work.
I know we can.
In fact, I came over here to tell you-- -I think I'm ready to say-- -Wait, wait.
Lois, wait.
What is this? -What? What? -lt looks like a puncture mark.
Mr.
Fences, I just discovered something in that new program you gave me that I would like to talk to you about.
-There you go.
-Thanks.
-Hot.
-lt is hot.
Well, there's a lot of reports on medical examinations by aliens on abductees and people having flashbacks, but nothing on trances.
And you had two in one day.
The first one was-- At 1 1 :00 exactly.
I remember looking at my watch.
And you jumped, I saved you.
I took off to stop the robbery came back and saved you again.
Forgot about the robbery, stayed with you.
And then at exactly 3:00, I do my trance thing again.
-Jimmy.
-Hey, guys.
Louise in Research can only move so fast.
-Forget the books.
Call the cops.
-See if there was a robbery yesterday-- -At exactly 3:00, particularly at a-- -At a high-tech firm.
Ask for everything-- --they've got.
Did you guys practice that? Go.
okay, so let's assume there was another robbery yesterday.
Maybe the timing of your trances wasn't completely accidental.
Maybe they were meant to keep Superman from stopping the robberies.
Then what would aliens, assuming that's who it was, want with our technology? -They're way ahead of us already.
-Y eah, that doesn't make sense.
Man, are you guys psychic or what? -Don't use that word.
-This just came over the fax.
At exactly 3:00 yesterday, some guys broke into QuantumPulse lndustries.
They're a contractor for the Defense Department.
They stole the prototype of the advanced pulse amplifier.
They figure it was an inside job, like the one at Zenith Chip.
In both cases, they've already got some suspects arrested.
Here.
They even sent over their mug shots.
Clark, I know these people.
They were both in my dream.
Now, I'm gonna ask you a few simple questions, just to put you at ease.
First, what's your name? -Lois Lane.
-And where do you live? -1 058 Carter Avenue.
-And if you could be an animal what type would you be, excluding invertebrates and certain classes of photoplankton? What? okay.
Now, remember.
You're in a warm, secure place.
If at any time you feel uncomfortable you'll emerge from this session by your choice.
I want you to think back to the dream you had last night.
What did you see? I'm in a white room.
There's a man and a woman on either side of me.
These creatures are leaning over me, talking to me.
-What are they saying? -I don't know.
It seems to be questions.
They keep talking to somebody standing behind me.
He seems to be giving them orders.
-What does he look like? -I can't see him.
I can't turn around.
-You never see him? -No.
Yes.
A reflection.
There's a tiny reflection.
Where? -on the mechanical arm.
-Can you focus on it? Yes.
It's-- It's-- It's Bob Fences.
-He was right there talking to them.
-To the aliens? No.
No, there weren't any aliens.
Don't you get it? The whole thing was staged.
They must've drugged me -and then given me those-- -Posthypnotic suggestions? -They know I'm friends with Superman.
-So they kidnap you-- -And brainwash me-- -T o put yourself in jeopardy -every time they wanna rob somebody.
-Superman misses the robberies because he's saving me.
But what would Fences want with computer chips and a pulse amplifier? That's where Solsvig comes in.
Wait.
-It's for you.
-Thanks.
Hello? -Lois? Good.
Listen, I thought you'd wanna know about this just as soon as it came in.
I just got a call from the police.
Yeah, thanks.
Martin Solsvig's been killed.
oh, no, my jet pack has failed.
-Bob? The transmitter's almost ready.
-Well, it's about time.
oh, and those two reporters are back.
Lane and Kent.
They wanna speak with you.
They're getting quite nosy, aren't they? I say we kill them.
With what, your breath? No, your face.
okay.
okay.
I say we hear what they have to say and then we decide.
I hope they're not whiners, like Solsvig.
okay.
okay, just send them in.
Not a word.
Mr.
Fences will see you now.
Miss Lane.
Mr.
Kent.
Mr.
Fences, I'll get straight to the point.
You kidnapped me, you drugged me, and you brainwashed me.
-Nice to see you too.
Anything else? -You killed Martin Solsvig.
Nope to both of those.
Next? Mr.
Fences, Lois saw you in the white room.
White room? No.
Was it padded? -I know what I saw.
-And where did you see this? In my dream.
Thank you for stopping by.
Don't let the door hit you on your way out.
I have a witness who can connect you to my kidnapping.
Ms.
Lane, I didn't do anything.
And as far as your witness, they were just dreaming like yourself.
Now, if you'll excuse me, I have some work to do.
Please.
What's he doing now? Nothing.
There was something on his computer but he turned if off before I could read it.
You hear anything? They're out of three-hole paper.
otherwise, it's just too many people.
So much for spooking him into giving himself away.
Maybe you were too subtle at the beginning.
I tried something different, so sue me.
Here's another article on Fences' personal fascination with aliens.
And another one on the unfairness of trade barriers.
And here's one on how he personally funded Solsvig's transmitter.
And yet another one on him railing against trade barriers.
Solsvig said his transmitter was nearly complete.
Why would he need more chips and a pulse amplifier? Maybe he wanted to make a really long-distance call.
So funny.
Aerospace, Submersible and Land Technologies Monthly.
There's a grabber.
Listen to this: " Due to Department of Defense budget adjustments research on new weapon systems were terminated in fiscal 1 994, including NASA's Super Microwave Transmitter.
" Weapons systems? Everything else says that it's for communications with aliens.
"Theoretical modifications project a deadly beam of microwave radiation--" "--that can boil living things but leave buildings and other nonorganic structures intact.
" So it could look like a harmless transmitter but be deadly.
Solsvig must've found out Fences' plans for his transmitter.
That's why he was killed.
"The microwave can be bounced off any satellite, hit any city on Earth fired so quickly that its point of origin would be undetectable.
" -Fences could blackmail for billions.
-But we've gotta stop him.
-Even I can't outfly a microwave.
-But we don't have any proof.
Are you sure you didn't see anything on that computer screen? Nothing.
Just a shrinking dot.
Maybe you just need some help remembering.
Now, I'm gonna ask you a few simple questions, just to put you at ease.
-First, what's your name? -Kal-el.
Can you believe this guy? He can even joke under hypnosis.
Just cut to the chase, okay? Now, remember, Clark.
You're in a warm, safe, fuzzy place kind of like you're living inside of a giant teddy bear that's missing one eye, because your stupid sister used him for home plate-- And at any time you wanna emerge, it's your choice, all right? -All right.
-okay.
Now, I want you to think back to your visit to Bob Fences this morning.
As you were leaving, you glanced at the computer.
Correct? -Correct.
-Did you see anything on it? He was turning it off as I looked.
Maybe just a glimpse, or a glimmer? -A document.
-Good.
Very good, Clark.
Now, relax.
Let your mind remember what you saw.
Let it hold on the image of the document.
Hold until you can see it and read it.
It's a letter.
-To the Prime Minister of Pacifonesia.
-What does it say? It demands $1 billion to be delivered to an offshore bank in the Cayman lslands or they will destroy one of their cities.
If he tries to contact lnterpol or anyone else, five cities will be destroyed.
-When will all this happen? -T oday, 5 p.
m.
, Eastern Standard Time.
Is there anything else you can remember? Anything else important? Yes.
His secretary had the most beautiful body in the world-- -What? -Next to Lois.
Target coordinates locked.
Microwave systems activated.
Those pikers still haven't paid up, so now it's time to french-fry.
-What about Superman? -Will you stop with the Superman stuff? By now, Lois should be hurling herself in front of a subway.
Commencing countdown.
Fourteen 13, 12, 1 1, 10 nine, eight, seven -six, five, four -Then again, maybe not.
two, one.
You idiot, it's still gonna get the signal to fire, but now it's gonna explode.
Well, that was invigorating.
Is she? This is your fault.
And then, because she'd had two trances already we checked for other hypnotic suggestions, I removed them.
And let me tell you, it was tougher than teaching two parrots to tango.
That's amazing.
Star, I want you to tell Lois that I don't want to see her for at least a week.
She's had a concussion.
If it wasn't for that thick skull of hers, she'd have a fracture.
So I don't care if Elvis Presley himself walks through the door.
I don't want her out of that bed.
-Don't worry, I'll tell her.
-All right.
Hi.
I was wondering if I might have a moment alone with Lois.
Yeah, yeah, sure.
We were just leaving.
I'm late for the well, for the gym.
Come on, Jimmy.
If Lois needs anything, anytime, just call me.
-Oh, thanks, Jimmy.
-Oh, Star.
Have you, by any chance, talked to the King lately? Lois, I feel horrible about this.
Clark, it's not your fault.
You saved my life.
No.
I got careless.
Maybe overconfident.
No matter how bad a situation is I always think I'm strong enough or fast enough to fix it.
And you are.
You saved a city full of people from being microwaved like popcorn.
But you still got hurt.
I'm used to saving people, Lois.
Not getting them injured.
You can't protect everybody all the time.
That's impossible.
I know.
That's what my Dad said.
And we can handle this.
I realize now that you and I together can handle this.
-I wanna tell you something.
-Lois, I need to tell you something too.
I know it's not the best time, or the most romantic-- Lois I love you.
I love you way too much to ever let something like this happen to you again.
I know I can't control everything but I can control people not using you to get to me.
And so that's why I came to tell you.
T o tell me what? T o tell you-- T o say we just can't be together anymore, Lois.
I'm sorry.
I have to go.
Clark?
Stop.
Hit the button.
Lois? That must have been painful.
Super-- Super-- Hey, hey, could you turn this thing off? -You all right? -Yeah.
I don't have to do the treadmill at the gym today.
I'll take them to the police.
I'll be back to see you home.
-oh, you don't have to do that.
-Lois-- Superman-- It's gonna be dark soon.
I would feel much better if you let me take you home.
Clark, I've driven home alone as long as you've known me and two million times before that.
I'll be fine.
-But-- -I admit, ever since I figured out I've taken more chances because I knew you'd be there.
But I am not a 6-year-old.
I can cross the street fine.
Wear your seat belt.
-Girlfriend problems? -Don't get me started.
Don't tell me.
You live here? This is so cool.
Lois Lane, right? Daily Planet? That must be a great place to work.
I don't have a subscription, but I love that logo.
I' m your new neighbor, Star.
Hi.
Jeez, it's not often I meet people who recognize me.
oh, I didn't.
No.
I've never seen you before in my life.
Not even in pictures.
If you were a snake, you could've bit me.
-So, what are you, psychic? -Yeah.
You too? -No.
How did you know my name? -I got it off of your valise.
I do psychic counseling and channeling.
Don't worry, I'm really quiet.
occasionally, I do hypnosis and taroting, crystal healings.
Never any of the dark stuff.
T oo scary.
I'm a Pisces.
Well, at least I am in this lifetime.
Was a Taurus once, was that bad.
Did you just come off a story? You look really whipped.
-Yeah, just out on a story.
-Wait a minute.
Wait a minute.
You really don't need to close your eyes, but most people expect it.
I'm getting-- I'm seeing something more than a story happened to you tonight.
No.
No, just a boring old story.
Nothing to get your brain scanned over.
I like to keep my brain private.
oh, I'm not prying.
I mean, your brain is practically shouting.
-lt is? -Let me see.
You were buying groceries and met Mel Gibson.
No, that's not it.
-You went for a drive and stopped-- -Yes? --at a tiny little diner, and ordered breakfast even though it was at night.
Mel Gibson sat down next to you.
No.
okay, you can tell where my mind's at.
Gee, you are tough.
I know.
I know.
I know, you were abducted by aliens.
Yes.
That's amazing.
How did you know that? I always know.
And then there was this blinding white light and I had sort of a floaty feeling.
And I have this vague, hazy memory of creatures.
And then, it was 6 a.
m.
and I was back in my car -and almost 1 1 hours had gone by.
-That must have been terrifying.
That doesn't even begin to describe it.
You don't have to talk about this if you don't want to.
oh, no.
Actually, it feels really good to talk to somebody.
It would just be too weird not to.
-More tea.
-Thanks.
I have to admit that when I met you downstairs I thought you were a little flaky, you know? But you really are-- I'm just touched by how understanding and down-to-earth you are.
Who knows? Maybe we were friends in an earlier life.
-Maybe.
-Do you remember anything else? No.
No, not really.
Just that they had these really large heads and slimy skin and their hands looked like ours.
I thought you were gonna describe these guys I know from the Pleiades -but, no, these guys sound different.
-The Pleiades? or Cassiopeians.
I mean, those guys.
Faster-than-light travel, cities that float and no indoor plumbing.
You gotta love it.
So you've been to where they live? Not physically.
Astrally, dozens of times.
Gee, look at the time.
I hate to do this, but I really have to get dressed for work.
No problem.
I still got some moving to do.
-Gemini, right? -Libra.
I knew it.
So I see you made it home safely last night.
Yeah.
-You want some Danish? -Yeah.
-Lois, are you mad at me? -No.
Because-- Look, I'm sorry.
It's just-- I worry about you.
Even more than I used to.
-Clark, last night-- -Lois.
Clark told me how you two cracked that luggage-theft story out at the airport.
Ride them, cowgirl.
Can't wait to see that copy on my desk.
Say, half an hour? -Perry? -He's been on a tear all morning.
He just started boxing lessons.
He's all pumped up.
I think he caught Alice checking out a waiter the other night.
-Star? -I had a flash after you left for work.
I knew you left because I can see who comes and goes from the window.
Maybe you'd like to read these books.
They're all about alien abduction.
Maybe you can get a clue about the guys who took you last night.
And if you only have time to read one, read this one.
It's by Dr.
Martin Solsvig.
He's the world's leading authority on alien abductions.
He lives right here in Metropolis.
Sorry to interrupt.
Cinnamon apple? -Yeah.
-I knew it.
I knew it.
If you want some entertainment, turn on the TV.
-Lois, did something happen last night? -No.
Nothing.
Sort of.
No, just my car stalled, and a big white light engulfed me.
I saw some aliens and I woke up in my front seat 1 1 hours later and it felt like two minutes.
-Did I mention floating? -You saw aliens? Krypton is not the only other planet in the universe with intelligent life.
I didn't say that.
I'm just saying that-- Scotty, stand by to beam me up.
Go ahead, laugh.
Make fun of me.
I'm not an idiot.
You don't think I've asked myself a thousand times if this really happened? Well, it really did.
Look, Lois, I apologize.
obviously, something has upset you.
Now, I don't know what it is, but I do know you and you wouldn't lie at least to me, most of the time.
So why don't we just forget about the airport story for now? Yeah.
You can turn it in later.
Now, whatever happened I want you and Clark to get to the bottom of it, now.
Spend whatever you need.
Are you feeling okay? Well, I just gotta keep those boys over there in Accounting on their toes.
Hey, that's a nice hairdo, Tinker Bell.
All right, you two, git.
Look out.
The death ray.
Don't worry, Princess Cleavage.
I will protect you.
So, Martin, what can I do for you today? My dress is on fire.
I guess I'll have to just take this off.
I don't know.
You sent for me.
-No.
You called me.
-Right.
Why did I call you? Could it be because of the Super Microwave Transmitter? The project you've been working on for six months? You know, if we microwave, they will come? Right.
Right.
our attempt to contact alien civilization.
I'm sorry, I'm trying to remember where I left my glasses.
Much better.
Now, let's see.
oh, yes, I received your new program.
We loaded it into the computer.
But, and I mention this in my memo we still have two problems we must solve before we can reach your goals.
-Stand by, anti-boredom ray.
-First they are not near what I had at NASA.
Those were from Zenith Chip, far above anything commercially available.
our chips just don't match them.
And two, we need a stronger pulse amplifier.
Unfortunately, one doesn't exist.
Do not worry about it.
I am Bob, Master of the Universe.
I own a $70 billion software company.
I can do anything I want.
-You will have your chips and amplifiers.
-Thank you, Bob.
-Has he figured it out yet? -Not a clue.
He still thinks this is a hobby of mine albeit a really expensive one.
For the past few years Nanoware's profits have been limited by trade barriers overseas.
But since negotiations have failed, that leaves us no choice but to make our money another way.
In two minutes, the empire begins to strike back.
-What? -Nothing.
Don't give me that look.
I know what you're thinking.
You're thinking I should've waited for you.
No, I'm not.
Clark, you cannot control everything.
We're both rational, thinking adults.
Sometimes I'm gonna do something that you disagree with.
That is what worries me.
Security system disarmed.
-So, what are we looking for? -I don't know.
Some sort of landing site or scorch marks.
A picture of them at Disney World.
Anything that looks like a UFo might've been here.
oh, hey.
Can you go left? I think that's where it happened.
-over there.
-Y es, ma'am.
All right, everybody, put your hands up.
You, get out of here.
Go.
-You, come here.
Go over there.
-No problem.
Stay calm and nobody gets hurt.
Got it? Come on.
Come on.
Let's go.
Get it in there.
All units in the vicinity of Fortnum and Mason we have a 2 15 silent alarm at Zenith Chip Corporation.
.
Robbery in progress.
-We have to go down.
T ake us down.
Lois.
C.
K.
It's all right, Lois.
I've got you.
-Lois, are you all right? -l' m fine.
Stay here.
I'll be right back.
I have to go stop a robbery.
Lois? Lois, look at me.
Clark? What happened? What am I doing here? You jumped out of the helicopter and I saved you.
Don't you remember? No.
Really? Yes, really.
And when we' re in public, you have to call me Superman.
Superman.
Thank God.
Lois, I thought you were a goner.
Where's Clark? You caught Clark, didn't you? Yeah, he's fine.
Lucky I heard him shouting.
He went to the control tower to let everybody know everything's okay.
Man, Lois, you looked like Greg Louganis.
Right out the door.
I must have slipped.
Jimmy, you go get Lois' car.
You've had enough flying for one day.
Sure thing.
I think we ought to have a little conversation with Dr.
Solsvig.
Everything went perfectly.
Superman was completely distracted.
He never made it to the robbery.
Give this to Solsvig.
He'll be overjoyed.
At 3:00, if everything continues as planned he'll have his pulse amplifier too.
And I will become Bob, Ruler of Everything and I will crush everyone who has thwarted me in the past.
Hypnosis.
I'm not really comfortable with that idea.
Please.
It's the best way to determine if what you experienced actually happened.
I'd be very happy to arrange a session, if you like.
I don't know.
What if I said something that I didn't want to get out? Well, then it would be out.
Now excuse me if I seem so excited but I've spent my entire life trying to contact alien civilizations.
So soon I will complete my Super Microwave Transmitter.
But until then, talking to people who've had your experience -is about as close as I'll ever get.
-There's always Superman.
Yes.
A one of a kind, so unlike any other alien ever reported.
Love to talk to him.
I had an unusual experience since.
You know.
Really? Like what? Well, this morning, I went into a trance for a brief period.
Perfectly natural.
Many people report enhanced paranormal abilities others, bizarre behavior.
Have you ever heard of a person putting themselves in jeopardy after an abduction? No.
That would be unusual.
Well, thank you for your time.
My time is space-time.
Physicist's joke.
Lois Lane and Clark Kent, am I right? The two most famous reporters in America.
Mr.
Fences, I know we haven't met.
I have the strangest feeling we have.
Well, I've been on the news a lot recently.
Yeah.
I read your article on trade barriers.
You seemed rather adamant.
Well, unfair trade barriers are the bane of U.
S.
business overseas.
And if negotiations fail, I believe that we should go to war.
Metaphorically speaking.
The thing I don't understand is, what would you jumping out of a helicopter -have to do with aliens? -I haven't the faintest.
In Close Encounters, Richard Dreyfuss was drawn to the mountain.
What could have been drawing you? The ground? It just doesn't make any sense.
Lucky I was there, though.
That is my nightmare.
You're gonna get in trouble and I'm not gonna be there.
-That's why when you-- -Hey, get out of the street.
Lois? Lois, it's me, Clark.
-lt happened again, didn't it? -Come on, I'll drive you home.
Unbelievable.
See you next week, Mr.
Schaffenberger.
That's Mr.
Schaffenberger.
He got hit by lightning and thinks he's Ben Franklin.
I'm helping him reach Thomas Jefferson.
They're working on a revision of the Declaration of lndependence.
I'd love to chat, but I gotta get ready for my next appointment.
Maybe you're not the only alien on the planet.
-She seems goodhearted.
-Actually, she is.
That's what's so odd.
Where're you going? I thought with everything that's going on right now, you wouldn't wanna be alone.
I appreciate your concern, but I'll be fine.
-How do you know? -I know.
So go.
You can't babysit me 24 hours a day.
other people need you too.
okay.
Get this: "Some abductees report an increase in their ability in psychic communication, either in reading thoughts or having their own thoughts read.
" Star.
What if she found out about Clark? "A few individuals stated that the only way they could prevent their thoughts from being perceived by others was to wear a skull cap of aluminum foil.
" Can you believe this? What am I doing? I' m talking to fish.
Hey.
Hey, don't turn away from me like that.
Lois? It's me, Star.
I brought you some ice cream.
It's choco chocolate monster chips with jelly bean bits.
I'll be right there.
You know, I just had the funniest feeling.
A little voice said, "Lois wants ice cream.
" Fish ice cream.
I didn't have any of that, so I brought this instead.
What's that on your head? It's just that Clark's such a worrywart.
He thinks I'm always putting myself in danger.
-Well, are you? -No.
Not all the time.
You can't be a great reporter without taking some risks.
And that's the only thing that keeps the two of you apart? Yeah.
Y eah, that and, you know, one or two other things.
Some of which might be my problems.
The biggest of which is that it scares me, the idea of committing to a relationship for life.
Don't you think he's scared too? -Yeah.
-But you two love each other? I mean it's not like you think you're gonna wake up one morning and find out that he shaved his head and tattooed the entire third act of Henry IV on it and then just gone off to live in some commune in Brazil where they worship a giant butterfly named Fred and then two years later, he sends you a note and says he can't come back because he's allergic to psychics, is it? oops, sorry.
-But you two love each other, right? -Yeah.
My parents loved each other, and they got divorced.
Well, you' re not your parents any more than they' re you.
Lois, what you want is a guaranteed, risk-free, happy-ever-after relationship.
There just is no such thing.
-It's scary.
-Lois if you're willing to risk your life for work why not risk your life for love? -I hate alarm clocks.
-It's the phone, Jonathan.
-Hello? -Hi, Mom.
Clark? Is everything all right? Y eah, fine.
I had to stop a mudslide in Chile, you know.
How is Lois? Well, that's actually the reason l' m calling.
Is this a father-son talk? You want me to butt out of this? No, Mom, it's not that kind of conversation at all.
It's-- Sometimes I feel like maybe Lois and l shouldn't be together.
Clark, did you two have a fight? No.
It's just-- It's Lois.
I'm worried that-- -I'm worried I'm a jinx.
-A jinx? Well, yeah, let's face it.
Ever since she's known me, she's been kidnapped pushed off buildings, poisoned, almost buried alive and who knows what else and it's all basically because of me.
-Have you talked to Lois about this? -Sort of.
It's just-- It's kind of uncomfortable.
We never seem to get very far.
Honey, loving a person means having the courage to talk about something even when it is uncomfortable.
You've gotta talk to her some more about this.
Communication is key.
I guess.
No matter how much you love somebody you can 't protect them from the evil in the world.
Even if you are Superman.
And don't forget, honey.
Lois knows what it means to be involved with you.
It's her choice too.
She's not a 6-year-old.
Clark? Clark, wake up.
It's me.
And she's here.
I'll talk to you guys later.
I love you.
Bye.
Clark? Clark, I remember.
I was kidnapped by aliens.
I had a flashback.
They had these big, bulging heads and they'd snatched these other people.
They had these thingamajigs over their mouths and-- -It's okay.
You're here.
It's okay.
-They had this big mechanical arm and it came over me, and it had a big needle and it was sticking in my neck and I was screaming and screaming.
I was screaming, and you weren't there.
It's okay.
It's okay.
I should have never let you go home alone, anyway.
-It's not your fault.
-But I feel responsible.
-Well, you shouldn't.
-Sure I should, Lois.
I love you.
And that's what makes it so difficult.
Every single time I'm off catching some bad guy, I can't help but think "ls Lois okay, or is she slowly being boiled in oil? " Really? And what I cannot stand is the idea that the closer we get, the more at risk you are.
-That's not true.
-okay, okay.
Let's just say, for argument's sake that you were kidnapped by aliens.
It's probably a lucky thing.
Because what if it had been any ordinary earthbound criminal and when you were drugged, you let slip that Clark Kent is Superman? Everybody knows that you and I are an item.
And to get to Superman, they would do anything to you.
-But that's a worst-case scenario.
-Who could predict you'd be kidnapped -by aliens? -What should I do? -Pretend I don't know you? -No.
What I'm saying is it's hard.
It's just hard.
It's harder than I ever thought it would be.
We can make it work.
I know we can.
In fact, I came over here to tell you-- -I think I'm ready to say-- -Wait, wait.
Lois, wait.
What is this? -What? What? -lt looks like a puncture mark.
Mr.
Fences, I just discovered something in that new program you gave me that I would like to talk to you about.
-There you go.
-Thanks.
-Hot.
-lt is hot.
Well, there's a lot of reports on medical examinations by aliens on abductees and people having flashbacks, but nothing on trances.
And you had two in one day.
The first one was-- At 1 1 :00 exactly.
I remember looking at my watch.
And you jumped, I saved you.
I took off to stop the robbery came back and saved you again.
Forgot about the robbery, stayed with you.
And then at exactly 3:00, I do my trance thing again.
-Jimmy.
-Hey, guys.
Louise in Research can only move so fast.
-Forget the books.
Call the cops.
-See if there was a robbery yesterday-- -At exactly 3:00, particularly at a-- -At a high-tech firm.
Ask for everything-- --they've got.
Did you guys practice that? Go.
okay, so let's assume there was another robbery yesterday.
Maybe the timing of your trances wasn't completely accidental.
Maybe they were meant to keep Superman from stopping the robberies.
Then what would aliens, assuming that's who it was, want with our technology? -They're way ahead of us already.
-Y eah, that doesn't make sense.
Man, are you guys psychic or what? -Don't use that word.
-This just came over the fax.
At exactly 3:00 yesterday, some guys broke into QuantumPulse lndustries.
They're a contractor for the Defense Department.
They stole the prototype of the advanced pulse amplifier.
They figure it was an inside job, like the one at Zenith Chip.
In both cases, they've already got some suspects arrested.
Here.
They even sent over their mug shots.
Clark, I know these people.
They were both in my dream.
Now, I'm gonna ask you a few simple questions, just to put you at ease.
First, what's your name? -Lois Lane.
-And where do you live? -1 058 Carter Avenue.
-And if you could be an animal what type would you be, excluding invertebrates and certain classes of photoplankton? What? okay.
Now, remember.
You're in a warm, secure place.
If at any time you feel uncomfortable you'll emerge from this session by your choice.
I want you to think back to the dream you had last night.
What did you see? I'm in a white room.
There's a man and a woman on either side of me.
These creatures are leaning over me, talking to me.
-What are they saying? -I don't know.
It seems to be questions.
They keep talking to somebody standing behind me.
He seems to be giving them orders.
-What does he look like? -I can't see him.
I can't turn around.
-You never see him? -No.
Yes.
A reflection.
There's a tiny reflection.
Where? -on the mechanical arm.
-Can you focus on it? Yes.
It's-- It's-- It's Bob Fences.
-He was right there talking to them.
-To the aliens? No.
No, there weren't any aliens.
Don't you get it? The whole thing was staged.
They must've drugged me -and then given me those-- -Posthypnotic suggestions? -They know I'm friends with Superman.
-So they kidnap you-- -And brainwash me-- -T o put yourself in jeopardy -every time they wanna rob somebody.
-Superman misses the robberies because he's saving me.
But what would Fences want with computer chips and a pulse amplifier? That's where Solsvig comes in.
Wait.
-It's for you.
-Thanks.
Hello? -Lois? Good.
Listen, I thought you'd wanna know about this just as soon as it came in.
I just got a call from the police.
Yeah, thanks.
Martin Solsvig's been killed.
oh, no, my jet pack has failed.
-Bob? The transmitter's almost ready.
-Well, it's about time.
oh, and those two reporters are back.
Lane and Kent.
They wanna speak with you.
They're getting quite nosy, aren't they? I say we kill them.
With what, your breath? No, your face.
okay.
okay.
I say we hear what they have to say and then we decide.
I hope they're not whiners, like Solsvig.
okay.
okay, just send them in.
Not a word.
Mr.
Fences will see you now.
Miss Lane.
Mr.
Kent.
Mr.
Fences, I'll get straight to the point.
You kidnapped me, you drugged me, and you brainwashed me.
-Nice to see you too.
Anything else? -You killed Martin Solsvig.
Nope to both of those.
Next? Mr.
Fences, Lois saw you in the white room.
White room? No.
Was it padded? -I know what I saw.
-And where did you see this? In my dream.
Thank you for stopping by.
Don't let the door hit you on your way out.
I have a witness who can connect you to my kidnapping.
Ms.
Lane, I didn't do anything.
And as far as your witness, they were just dreaming like yourself.
Now, if you'll excuse me, I have some work to do.
Please.
What's he doing now? Nothing.
There was something on his computer but he turned if off before I could read it.
You hear anything? They're out of three-hole paper.
otherwise, it's just too many people.
So much for spooking him into giving himself away.
Maybe you were too subtle at the beginning.
I tried something different, so sue me.
Here's another article on Fences' personal fascination with aliens.
And another one on the unfairness of trade barriers.
And here's one on how he personally funded Solsvig's transmitter.
And yet another one on him railing against trade barriers.
Solsvig said his transmitter was nearly complete.
Why would he need more chips and a pulse amplifier? Maybe he wanted to make a really long-distance call.
So funny.
Aerospace, Submersible and Land Technologies Monthly.
There's a grabber.
Listen to this: " Due to Department of Defense budget adjustments research on new weapon systems were terminated in fiscal 1 994, including NASA's Super Microwave Transmitter.
" Weapons systems? Everything else says that it's for communications with aliens.
"Theoretical modifications project a deadly beam of microwave radiation--" "--that can boil living things but leave buildings and other nonorganic structures intact.
" So it could look like a harmless transmitter but be deadly.
Solsvig must've found out Fences' plans for his transmitter.
That's why he was killed.
"The microwave can be bounced off any satellite, hit any city on Earth fired so quickly that its point of origin would be undetectable.
" -Fences could blackmail for billions.
-But we've gotta stop him.
-Even I can't outfly a microwave.
-But we don't have any proof.
Are you sure you didn't see anything on that computer screen? Nothing.
Just a shrinking dot.
Maybe you just need some help remembering.
Now, I'm gonna ask you a few simple questions, just to put you at ease.
-First, what's your name? -Kal-el.
Can you believe this guy? He can even joke under hypnosis.
Just cut to the chase, okay? Now, remember, Clark.
You're in a warm, safe, fuzzy place kind of like you're living inside of a giant teddy bear that's missing one eye, because your stupid sister used him for home plate-- And at any time you wanna emerge, it's your choice, all right? -All right.
-okay.
Now, I want you to think back to your visit to Bob Fences this morning.
As you were leaving, you glanced at the computer.
Correct? -Correct.
-Did you see anything on it? He was turning it off as I looked.
Maybe just a glimpse, or a glimmer? -A document.
-Good.
Very good, Clark.
Now, relax.
Let your mind remember what you saw.
Let it hold on the image of the document.
Hold until you can see it and read it.
It's a letter.
-To the Prime Minister of Pacifonesia.
-What does it say? It demands $1 billion to be delivered to an offshore bank in the Cayman lslands or they will destroy one of their cities.
If he tries to contact lnterpol or anyone else, five cities will be destroyed.
-When will all this happen? -T oday, 5 p.
m.
, Eastern Standard Time.
Is there anything else you can remember? Anything else important? Yes.
His secretary had the most beautiful body in the world-- -What? -Next to Lois.
Target coordinates locked.
Microwave systems activated.
Those pikers still haven't paid up, so now it's time to french-fry.
-What about Superman? -Will you stop with the Superman stuff? By now, Lois should be hurling herself in front of a subway.
Commencing countdown.
Fourteen 13, 12, 1 1, 10 nine, eight, seven -six, five, four -Then again, maybe not.
two, one.
You idiot, it's still gonna get the signal to fire, but now it's gonna explode.
Well, that was invigorating.
Is she? This is your fault.
And then, because she'd had two trances already we checked for other hypnotic suggestions, I removed them.
And let me tell you, it was tougher than teaching two parrots to tango.
That's amazing.
Star, I want you to tell Lois that I don't want to see her for at least a week.
She's had a concussion.
If it wasn't for that thick skull of hers, she'd have a fracture.
So I don't care if Elvis Presley himself walks through the door.
I don't want her out of that bed.
-Don't worry, I'll tell her.
-All right.
Hi.
I was wondering if I might have a moment alone with Lois.
Yeah, yeah, sure.
We were just leaving.
I'm late for the well, for the gym.
Come on, Jimmy.
If Lois needs anything, anytime, just call me.
-Oh, thanks, Jimmy.
-Oh, Star.
Have you, by any chance, talked to the King lately? Lois, I feel horrible about this.
Clark, it's not your fault.
You saved my life.
No.
I got careless.
Maybe overconfident.
No matter how bad a situation is I always think I'm strong enough or fast enough to fix it.
And you are.
You saved a city full of people from being microwaved like popcorn.
But you still got hurt.
I'm used to saving people, Lois.
Not getting them injured.
You can't protect everybody all the time.
That's impossible.
I know.
That's what my Dad said.
And we can handle this.
I realize now that you and I together can handle this.
-I wanna tell you something.
-Lois, I need to tell you something too.
I know it's not the best time, or the most romantic-- Lois I love you.
I love you way too much to ever let something like this happen to you again.
I know I can't control everything but I can control people not using you to get to me.
And so that's why I came to tell you.
T o tell me what? T o tell you-- T o say we just can't be together anymore, Lois.
I'm sorry.
I have to go.
Clark?