My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic s03e12 Episode Script

Games Ponies Play

You absolutely sure you can do this? Of course! Wouldn't have agreed to it if I couldn't.
Piece of cake! Speaking of cake, I got a little something I need to attend to.
Yeah, like keeping an eye on a house full of critters.
Uh, yeah, that was totally what I was talking about.
Relax! Go to your welcoming thing in the Crystal Empire.
Spike's got it all under control.
Hurry up, Twilight! We can't miss our train! Tickets.
Oh, this is gonna be a real treat.
Princess Cadance said she'd never seen the Crystal Ponies so excited.
Of course they're excited.
They're up for the Equestria Games! It's only the biggest sporting event in all of Equestria.
Didn't Cloudsdale host the Equestria Games one year? No.
Cloudsdale should have hosted the games one year.
I'll never forget when we got the bad news.
The Equestria Games go to the city of Fillydelphia.
NOOOOOOO! These Crystal Ponies lost a thousand years to an evil King's curse.
They've had enough bad news.
No way we're letting them experience the pain of losing out on these games.
Exactly.
Princess Cadance is counting on us to do our part to convince the Games Inspector to choose the Crystal Empire.
And we are not gonna let her down.
Are we? NOOOOOOO! What? I was just answering Twilight's question.
Season 3 | Episode 12 Games Ponies Play Four, three, two, one, the Crystal Empire, that's the one! Okay, everypony, great job! Sounds like we're ready.
One more time, from the top.
Oh, please.
I think that was perfect.
Well, we've run this like twelve times already.
I think we got it.
Cadance said the Games Inspector really puts folks through the wringer on her visits.
There's no margin for error here.
And this time we need to practice the steps.
On a train car? You heard the pony! On your hooves! Two, four, six, eight-- Crystal Empire, ladies! Watch your step leaving the train! Probably should've watched our step while we were still on it, too.
The Crystal Empire looks crystallier than ever! They must have every pony in the Empire out sprucing it up! This must be why we are asked to handle the welcome committee routine.
And it's probably also because we'll be awesome at it! Princess Cadance was right.
These ponies do look pretty darn excited.
Yup, I remember that feeling.
But not as much as I remember the crushing wave of disappointment that came when things didn't work out.
That right there! That is the face I do not want to see.
We're here.
There are my girls! Sunshine, sunshine, ladybugs awake! Clap your hooves and do a little shake! Oh, my.
This is spectacular.
Please, everypony, stand back! I need air! Go ahead and try whatever you like.
It's all complimentary for the welcome committee.
That over there is a crystal mud bath, which relaxes your body and rejuvenates your coat.
Now, I realize it can be kind of strange to climb into mud, but if you'll just give it a chance, I'm sure-- Pinkie, no! Ah, so relaxing! Pinkie Pie, honestly.
Go ahead, have a good time while I get my ceremonial headdress done.
Ceremonial headdress? When meeting with important guests, it was tradition for rulers of the Crystal Empire to weave crystals into their manes in a very specific way.
The Games Inspector is known for doing her homework.
She'll certainly be expecting my look to reflect the importance of her visit.
Princess.
If I may have a word, I have two pieces of news for you.
First, your mane stylist has the flu and won't be able to make it for fear of you catching it, too.
Well I hope she's better soon.
Do any of the other stylists here know how to do the traditional royal ceremonial headdress? Just a small detail.
You're trying to land the Equestria Games here! There is no such thing as a small detail! Rainbow Dash! I suppose I could give it a shot.
Oh Rarity, you would do that for me? Way to step it up, Rare! Fortunately, I have all the precise instructions right here.
Oh my.
You sure you're up to this? Working on the hair of royalty on such an auspicious occasion is the opportunity of a lifetime! I will give it everything I've got! See? No worries! Besides, the Games Inspector isn't expected for several hours.
I'll have plenty of time to figure out exactly how to do this Oh, Rarity, that's wonderful! You said you had a second bit of news? Yes, quite.
The Games Inspector, Ms.
Harshwhinny, will be arriving on the next train.
What!? You couldn't have told us that news first!? That's fifteen minutes from now! How long before Cadance is ready? I'm sure to find some shortcuts.
Can you have her back at the castle when we're done? Done! Okay, we'll be fine.
Everypony, just look out for the pony with the flower print luggage.
Easy peasy, pudding in the freezy! We'll bring the Games Inspector back to the castle, put on our big welcome committee how-do-you-do and then Put the pudding out to thaw before you eat it or you'll crack a tooth? I'll just ignore that.
We need to remember that the Games Inspector arriving early is probably part of a plan to psyche us out.
What do you mean? You said it yourself, she's got a rep for catching hosts off-guard.
Just to see if we can handle the kind of massive pressure that comes with hosting the Equestria Games! Oh, no We're gonna blow it Not if we always stay one step ahead and don't fall for any of her mind games.
Anything she throws at us, we just needs to remember she's testing us and roll with it.
Excuse me, ma'am? Yes, what is it? - Oh, no! - Be cool.
Well, I know you're not expecting us, but we're here to personally welcome you to the Crystal Empire.
The whole lot of you came to do that? Uh, well, um, yes! Well, darn tootin', ain't that the cat's meow! Y'all didn't need to do that.
Why, I hardly expected anything like this.
The Princess wouldn't have had it any other way.
The Princess? Princess Cadance? None other! Well, tie me up and throw me down, this just keeps gettin' better and better! - Can we help you with your bags? - Don't mind if you do! Ooh, I love flower print! Sorry.
Our first stop is the castle, where we got a razzamatazzy welcome planned for you! The castle? Are you kidding? Hot-diggety-dawg! See that? We just gotta roll with it until the Princess gets there and we'll be just fine.
So, uh how's it going so far? Oh, I'm so sorry It's just so complicated.
- I can fix it! - Fix what? Well, I was looking for shortcuts and I thought step twelve was optional! But it's not! My golly, the crystal castle! I've seen pictures but I never expected to see it with my very own eyes! From the inside Oh my gosh, she's so nice! You're letting her lull you into a false sense of confidence.
Watch that.
It's all part of the game.
Oh my, I'm so excited.
Please, have a seat, won't you? Mind if I take a quick run outside first? It was an awfully long train ride and my legs could use a stretch.
Oh, well We were just about to start.
Oh! Never you mind.
You go on ahead.
I'm listening.
She was probably testing us to see if we could remain in control of a complex situation.
Looks like we passed.
We'd like to thank you for this opportunity to introduce you to this wonderful kingdom! Oh, well, the pleasure is all mine.
And since we're not even from here ourselves, who better than us to let you know just how welcoming this place can be! Two, four, six, eight! Name a place that's really great! One, two, three, four! Keeps you coming back for more! Two, seven, nine, three! The place that we all wanna be! Four, three, two, one! The Crystal Empire, that's the one! I tell ya! I have travelled far and wide, but I have never ever been welcomed anyplace in the fashion y'all have done here today.
That's fantastic! Princess Cadance will be so glad to hear that! Honestly, I'm surprised she knows anything about me at all! Of course she does! She's been looking forward to your visit for weeks! Oh, goody! Is she here? Where the heck is she, anyway? Wasn't she supposed to be here by now? Oh, that's alright.
Maybe-- I'll just take my little run outside now.
Or, if you like, we could give you a tour of the castle! That way you could be learning and stretching all at the same time! A tour of the crystal castle I'd love that a whole heap.
Dash! We've hardly ever even been here before! It's just another test! We gotta roll with it, remember? Lemme give the tour! I'lldoit, I'lldoit, letmeletmeletme! Fine.
You all start giving her the tour and I'll go see what's keeping Cadance.
- Hello there! - Hello yourself.
First hello of the day-- Wha-What are you doing here? We finished the welcome committee song and we just wanted to introduce Ms.
Harshwhinny to-- No, no! Princess Cadance isn't ready.
Something's gone terribly wrong! - I need to speak to the Princess.
- You can't! You musn't! She's in the middle of a delicate conditioning rinse that must go perfectly if there's to be any hope for her hair! Come on, how bad can it be? Imagine her mane turned into a porcupine.
Please, I will bring her back from the brink of tragedy, but you have got to buy me some time! There's no other way! So, you see this here? This, um, this is, um a big, round room.
It's known for its roundness.
And bigness.
And did I mention that it's round? I think they call it a rotunda? A small, confining, rotunda Whatever.
Round is round, am I right? Easy, Pinkie, let's play this safe! We got her in a good mood, so let's not do anything to ruin that.
You know I love this sort of architecture, I detect a neo-gothic inspiration in the design, yes? Hey! Look at me! And not a moment too soon.
Where's Cadance? Please tell me she's right behind you.
There's a bit of a problem with her headdress.
How's it going here? I, uh, hate to be a bother, but the legs are cramping up on me with all this standing around She's getting bored.
And we have to buy Rarity some more time.
I'll see if Shining Armor can come help.
Can't one of you other ponies take over in the meantime? I got this.
Wanna stretch your legs, huh? Well, whatever you need, I'm sure we can provide.
Let's just make our way to the castle's gymnasium.
Our tour will now be headed this way.
And we're walking, and we're walking Twily! Hello there! Shining Armor, you've gotta help me.
Everything okay? I left the other ponies behind giving the Games Inspector the worst castle tour ever.
Come on, gang! Are we gonna gallop, or are we gonna trot!? Castle tour, huh? I'm pretty sure I can give you a hoof with that.
Let's move, move, move! Everything's gonna be okay.
I know, I'm not worried.
I'm not worried it worked! I'm outside! Feels so good to stretch the old legs! Uh, what the-- Turns out the crystal castle doesn't have a gymnasium.
Watch it! Make her stop! Wait, that's the Games Inspector! Let her do her thing.
Oh, these hooves! I'm outside! - Why would she do that? - I have no idea.
But, that's why she's in charge of choosing who gets the Games, and we're not.
Oh, get me outside for a run! Look out! Yeah, okay, we need to stop her.
Where's she going in such a hurry? Closer closer I think we've got her! Oh, that felt good! Nothing like a great run to shake the cobwebs off these old bones.
Hey there, speedy.
Ah, these wide open spaces y'all got here remind me of home.
This is great! Oh! So you're enjoying your visit? Well, I'm so glad! Oh good golly, yes, I just love to travel and see new places.
Such a beautiful spot you got here, too! Why thank you so much! I'm Shining Armor.
The Prince! - What's going on? - From the looks of it, just locking up the games for the Crystal Empire is all.
Ain't no thing.
My oh my I never met a Prince before I'm surprised.
I'd think in your line of work, you'd meet princes all the time.
Hardly.
Just an ordinary wild mustang from Mustangia here to enjoy a little vay-cay.
Never thought I'd also be meeting royalty to boot.
You are Ms.
Harshwhinny, the Equestria Games Inspector, aren't you?! Inspector what-now? We got the wrong pony?! NOOOOOOOOOOO! I mean, YEEEEEEESSSSSSSS! Oh, please still be here oh please oh please oh please There's got to be another pony with flower print luggage around here somewhere Except that there isn't! We've gotta find her before Cadance finds out what a mess we've made of things.
Okay, here's what we do.
We split the Empire up into five sectors.
Each of us search a sector.
Well Except for the spa.
What's the point of checking there? That's where Cadance is.
If Ms.
Harshwhinny is there, well, then, game over, right? Every city and empire wants to host the Equestria Games! So, I have to go through all the big phony-baloney song and dance, though of course, I'm never getting the real inside scoop.
Oh, golly I've been having a swell time since I got here! I'm actually thinking of extendin' my stay.
And what exactly has made your visit so special? Gosh, where to start? There she is! We're in luck! I don't think either of them knows yet that the other one's here! Wonderful news, look! Princess Cadance, better than new! Princess Cadance? So, this is where you've been! I will have you know this is by far the worst welcome I've had in all my years! I-I can't believe it What was wrong with your welcome? There wasn't one! What is going on? Princess, we gave our welcome to the wrong pony.
Left the right one waiting at the station, and completely ruined everything.
Cinnamon bun? When I was a little filly, I wanted so badly for Cloudsdale to win the Equestria Games.
But, it didn't happen.
So I thought I could make up for that disappointment by helping the Crystal Empire win the chance to host the Games.
But it looks like I ruined your chances instead.
Not so fast, speedy.
I just finished hearing about how this pony was just treated to the warmest, finest, most fabulous reception she ever had.
Darn tootin'! Courtesy of these fine ponies right here.
Which, in my expert opinion, amounts to the first ever unvarnished, unrehearsed, and unbiased appraisal of a potential host of the Equestria Games.
Which can only mean one thing The next host of the Equestria Games is the Crystal Empire! We did it! Congratulations, crystal ponies! You know, it feels good to help others get something you always wanted but never had.
Almost as good as getting it yourself.
Almost.
We'll still be able to come back here and watch the games when they're played.
You're right.
That'll rock! Oh, my goodness.
All aboard! Bummer Spike had to miss out on all this.
He woulda' had fun here.
I'm sure he's having a great time watching all the critters back at home.
Think he's still got a handle on things? If he's staying calm and collected, I bet he's doing a terrific job as a leader.
You all hear that?
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