Salish & Jordan Matter (2026) s01e01 Episode Script

[Jordan] Today, my daughter, Salish,
goes to her first day of high school.
[all chanting] New kid!
What she doesn't know
is I've set up ten extreme challenges…
[aggressively] Get in the locker.
…and I'll be watching on hidden cameras.
What is with this school?
This school is not normal.
I dropped Salish off at this high school
for a day of extreme summer school,
and she is so excited.
Oh my God, this is not it.
Why am I here? Dad, seriously.
Salish is starting high school
in two weeks,
so today, she's gonna go
to this super hard summer school
to make sure she's ready.
If she can survive this school,
high school will be easy.
First, I have to go
to the principal's office.
And I'm pretty sure it's right here.
[whispering] So, yeah, let's go.
I have 100 secret cameras hidden
throughout this school,
and she has no idea.
- You must be Salish.
- Hi.
- Nice to meet you.
- I'm Mr. Brown.
I'm the principal.
Welcome. Please, sit down.
What Salish doesn't know is everyone
in this school is a professional actor,
and they're working from this script.
The students have been here all summer.
They're gonna be thrilled to see you.
I was looking over your schedule,
and I printed out a copy for you.
If anybody gives you a hard time,
you can always come here.
- I'll help you out.
- Oh, okay.
- Learn lots.
- Oh, I'll try.
Thank you.
- Think she bought it?
- Why'd he say "hard time"? Kinda weird.
I'm gonna keep vlogging
for the rest of the day,
so if anything weird happens,
you guys will see it too.
Salish is in an entirely different wing
of this school,
but later, you're gonna see her here
being monitored by those cameras.
I rented this entire school
and hired actors
to make it
the most challenging school day.
We've been rehearsing all morning.
- One, two, three, go crazy!
- [all clamoring]
Salish is gonna have to survive crushes,
bullying, emotional outbursts…
[bawling]
…and much more.
If she can handle today,
she will be ready for high school.
I gotta go to my office. I have
my own office here to watch everything.
- Alex, how'd it go?
- She doesn't suspect a thing.
Perfect. I'm gonna be in here all day.
I can monitor from this laptop.
Alan Chikin Chow is a YouTuber,
and he's gonna play a bully.
I don't think she knows who he is.
I wanna make sure Salish
can handle anything,
so I've come up with a series
of extreme challenges,
starting with rowdy boys.
Salish hates chaos,
so let's see how she handles
the first moment in her new class.
[quietly] Now I'm looking
for my class, um…
I don't really know which one it is,
but it's okay. I'll find it.
- So…
- [clamoring]
Oh! No, not that one.
[indistinct chatter and clamoring]
Oh my gosh, it's so loud in there.
This is mean. Alan is gonna put a cupcake
on the seat. Salish is gonna sit on it.
I don't wanna watch.
Okay. Well, I guess I gotta go in.
- [chanting] New kid!
- [clamoring]
[chanting] New kid!
[chanting] New kid!
I don't wanna see her.
Oh! She's gonna be upset.
[all clamoring]
New kid!
Oh my gosh. Thank you so much.
I was so hungry.
I haven't eaten breakfast today,
so thanks.
That wasn't…
[laughing]
I did not see that coming.
Kill 'em with kindness.
If somebody tries to bully you,
smile and turn it back on them.
We have one camera
right behind the screen.
It's a perfect shot.
She has no idea it's there.
I told Salish she could leave whenever,
so she doesn't feel forced to stay.
[indistinct chatter]
Right here is perfect
because I don't think the teacher
can see me vlogging,
but this school is crazy.
All the kids are yelling.
In high school,
classes can be super boring,
but you pay attention
'cause grades matter.
Let's see if she can stay awake,
much less focus.
[indistinct chatter]
Oh my God, not this joker.
Welcome back to summer school.
I had to practice with this guy
to make him more boring.
I'll move this out the way.
[screeching]
How's Salish gonna handle everybody being
rude to the teacher? Will she be rude?
[monotonously] Today, we're gonna be
talking about [sighs] pre-algebra.
Who threw that? [sighs] I'm watching you.
[snickering]
Last time, Salish caught me faking
at the world's strictest school,
but this time, she'll have no idea.
We spent yesterday hiding cameras.
Salish has never been to this school,
and we rehearsed all morning,
so we are super prepared.
[teacher monotonously]
2X plus 5 equals 10.
Who wants detention?
- This teacher is so boring.
- Minus 8. Cross out the 5.
The Y goes on both sides.
- [teacher] You all getting it? Yeah?
- [boy] No one cares. You suck.
[whispering] They're so rude.
- [boy] Got it.
- It's supposed to be fun.
[snoring]
- [teacher] Five, both sides.
- I'll give her the wrong answer.
Who can tell me the answer
to this equation? Anyone?
Salish, how about you?
She's done.
She's not gonna know the answer.
Oh, I wasn't… I'm…
- You were paying attention, right?
- No, yeah.
[teacher] If you were paying attention,
you should know this.
It's eight.
- [teacher] Come up here. You got this.
- Yeah.
- He gave her the wrong answer.
- There you go.
Um…
Oh, X equals 5.
[dinging]
- Wow.
- She got the answer right?
- Good job.
- Good try.
- Dang it!
- She just completely ignored him.
Everyone should be like Salish.
Good job, Salish. Good job.
[sighing] Next,
Salish is asked out on a date.
I didn't wanna put this in,
but I was overruled by the team
who said it's gonna happen,
might as well see how she handles it.
You're gonna pass a note.
You're not really hitting on her, right?
- Yeah.
- We're all good.
- How old are you?
- 14.
Don't say anything. Hand her a note.
You know she's gonna say yes.
Text me so I can see.
Hopefully, that'll be no.
[monotonously] Back in my day
in high school,
I loved algebra.
[teacher] I got to learn so much
from the teachers.
[teacher] They even became my best friends
of my high school days.
[teacher] And I even ate lunch
with the teachers.
What did she say? Oh, okay.
She said, "No, thanks," which is
the nicest way to turn someone down.
Next, emotion.
Salish hates emotion.
You know that about her.
Let's see how she handles this.
- Hey, what did that note say?
- Nothing.
- He asked you out, didn't he?
- No.
[teacher] It was amazing, so remember…
[whispering] What did I do?
[chuckling] That's awkward.
[teacher] …quiz later.
- [boy 3] Pop quiz?
- [teacher] That's…
Good acting. I believe she's crying.
- [whispering] You made her cry.
- What did I do? I didn't do anything.
You've been here five minutes,
and you're making girls cry?
Um, can I use the bathroom?
- Huh?
- Can I use the bathroom?
We didn't rehearse for her to leave.
- You wanna use the bathroom?
- [Salish] The bathroom.
- Yes.
- Don't let her leave.
- I… Sure, yeah.
- Okay.
- Yeah.
- Thanks.
We don't have anybody.
It's gonna look empty.
- Just go right out there.
- Yeah.
- I don't know where she's going.
- What is happening?
[all clamoring]
[indistinct chatter]
Where's she going?
We have a security camera in the hallways.
This school is so weird.
She's not going to the bathroom at all.
She's vlogging. I can't hear her.
First of all, this guy asks me out,
then the girl starts crying,
probably 'cause she likes him.
Guys! I have a plan.
Thinking about it, I wonder if my dad
just set up a different fake school
because, bro, this is so weird.
Like, what kind of school is this?
If she likes high school so much,
let's stick her in high school forever.
- [all] Ooh!
- Oh yeah.
[indistinct chatter]
Is this in the script?
He's putting glue on her chair.
[indistinct chatter]
Come on. I hear her.
If she gets glue in her hair,
oh, or on her hoodie…
She buys her own clothes.
Those are not cheap.
Do I look young,
or are some of these kids really old?
This is kind of weird.
If I go out, she'll probably see me,
but I think glue might be
a little extreme.
Actors, act.
[teacher] All right.
I just really hope this class ends soon
because it is so boring, bro.
Can I make it into the class and back?
This is gonna be so weird,
but I have to go back to class.
She's coming back. Okay.
[clears throat]
- Salish
- Hey.
Welcome. Welcome back.
All right.
- Can I get your hoodie? I'm really cold.
- You have a hoodie on.
It's not warm enough.
- [teacher] 5X…
- All right.
…plus 4 minus 4.
- Thanks.
- [teacher] Both sides.
What? Oh, that is good.
[whispering] That's on me. My fault.
- Looks comfortable.
- Very.
I can't even tell you how great it is
to turn it around on a bully.
Day one, she got a bully.
He tries to do something,
she's like, "Eh."
5X…
I don't like bullying,
I don't want her to experience it,
but the fact is,
it is a reality of high school.
If she's gonna experience it,
I'd rather have her do it here first
in a safe environment.
She can leave whenever.
So far, I guess she doesn't think
it's too intense.
Time to move on to another challenge.
[bell ringing]
Oh. All right, class is dismissed.
Everyone go to your next period.
The teacher is gonna tell Salish
to go to the next class with the bullies.
Watch what happens.
Good job, everyone.
Salish, do you need help
going to your next class?
No, I'm good.
- Actually, can you two take her?
- [girl] Yeah.
- I'm fine.
- [teacher] Awesome. Thank you guys.
- [Alan] Salish, we got you.
- Have a great rest of your day, Salish.
- Okay.
- Come on, Say-Say.
You know, Say-Say, before we go to class,
I need to show you your locker.
- Okay.
- They're beautiful.
Gabe can't get his hoodie off the chair.
[ripping]
I saw this note that guy sent you.
- Yeah.
- What was that?
Oh, he just asked me to go on a date.
- What? So what'd you think? Spill the tea.
- Ooh!
Um, I said no.
Why? He's so cute.
I don't know. Let's go.
We gotta get to class.
- Oh, Salish.
- You have to tell me.
You can't keep things from friends.
[girl] That's not cool.
[knocking]
Oh my God. You scared me, Gabe.
I thought that was Salish. Come in.
Hey, Mr. Matter.
Okay, I know. I'm sorry. Oh gosh.
I'll get you a new hoodie.
Those are expensive.
Salish isn't following anything rehearsed.
She thinks this is real,
so you gotta improvise.
In high school,
there are a lot of bad influences.
Oh, yeah, I know.
But not us. We're great.
- Okay. Yeah.
- Look, your locker.
Oh, perfect.
- Wow. It's so beautiful.
- Looks nice and cozy.
- Yeah!
- You know?
- Can we get closer?
- You should get in.
That's okay.
You can bend 'cause you do gymnastics.
You should get in.
This is not the plan.
If you're getting bullied, pushed around,
getting told what to do,
or if you feel unsafe in any way,
tell your parents.
[aggressively] Salish, get in the locker.
It's so nice.
- It's good luck. You have to.
- Get in the locker!
That's okay. We gotta go to class.
Let's go, come on. Gotta find my class!
When we rehearsed,
I told them to be chill.
They're going over the top.
Salish is gonna figure this out.
She's caught me before.
- Salish!
- Say-Say, your class is there.
- Right there!
- Are you sure?
- Yeah. Go on in.
- Are you positive?
- Yeah.
- Super. 100%.
Are you sure?
- I saw your schedule.
- Okay.
- Second period!
- Salish has never been at this school.
She doesn't know
this is a teacher's lounge.
This doesn't look like my classroom.
Wait. It's the teacher's lounge.
- Oh, yeah, we should go.
- No. We lied.
We have filled this room
with everything Salish loves.
There's Sephora, snacks, Dr. Pepper,
which is her favorite soda.
What do you do when the cool kids
invite you to break a rule,
and it's not terrible,
but you shouldn't do it?
She's gonna take something.
[excitedly] Oh my gosh.
This is from Sephora. Don't you love this?
- Try this.
- Wait, dude. Real Radiant. Oh my Gosh.
- Wow.
- Thank you.
Chelsea put icing on Salish's nose
so she would look guilty.
Oh, that's smart.
- Whoa. That's so good.
- Oh my gosh, Pringles. I love Pringles!
- We should not do this.
- Feastables!
[excitedly] There's Feastables
and Ferrero Rocher! Yeah!
It wouldn't be the worst thing,
but she shouldn't take anything.
- We shouldn't do this. No!
- Catch!
She's not taking the bait.
No, I think we should close the door.
Wait. You gotta clean up.
- That's what I've been saying!
- Put it back.
- Bro.
- Salish. You gotta get that.
Oh my gosh. I need your help!
Clean up real quick.
It'll take two seconds.
- Okay.
- All right.
[clinking]
She is not falling
for the bad influence thing.
If something in your gut
or heart feels wrong,
it's probably wrong.
- What are you doing in here?
- I was trying to find my class. I'm sorry.
It says faculty only.
It's not for children or minors.
I didn't see.
She got busted for doing something
that isn't her fault.
Tell on Alan and Chelsea. They deserve it.
- Does this look like a classroom?
- No, I was putting things away.
- Did you…
- No, I found it like this.
- You found it like this?
- Yes.
This is tough because if you tell on them,
you become a snitch.
If you don't, you get busted.
I'm gonna have to have
a conversation with my staff.
She's gonna tell on them.
- Were you with anybody?
- No.
I'm gonna let you off this time,
but, Missy,
next time, I'm calling the cops
'cause this is serious.
- Okay?
- The cops next time!
- The cops!
- Okay.
Okay. That was intense.
Salish made a choice not to tell
the teacher about Alan and Chelsea.
I'm sure if this was a real day at school,
she would've told my wife and I
about this experience.
Bro, they got me in trouble.
They led me into there,
even though that wasn't my class.
That's so weird.
Also, cops is like a little bit overkill.
Like, cops for going
into the wrong classroom? Like, jeez.
[Alan] Hey!
You scared me. I thought it was Salish.
- What is up?
- She is so smart.
We're trying to get her to experience
real high school bullying,
but I think
she's getting through a lot of it.
She's handling it. I'm happy.
But what about the glue though?
The glue!
The glue was pretty bad.
This is high school,
so we gotta up the bullying ante.
- What are you gonna do?
- It's better you don't know.
- What?
- Trust us.
I don't want her to know this is fake.
- If she finds out--
- Secret's safe.
I'm gonna be in so much trouble.
Don't hurt her. She's my little girl.
If you're in high school,
this is gonna happen.
The "cool crowd" are gonna exclude you.
- [giggling] Wait, who? No way! You're not…
- [screaming]
- Oh no! [snorting]
- What are you guys doing?
- Wouldn't you like to know?
- Who are you?
- Aren't you a freshman?
- Okay.
Who was that? Weird.
Nice to meet you guys.
If you wanna talk later, let me know.
That's what I thought.
Salish couldn't care less.
She's got her own friends.
She doesn't need them.
I was trying to go to those girls
and talk to them,
try and make friends,
and they were so weird.
They were rude. They thought
they ate that up, but they did not.
That was weird. They were so mean.
What is with this school?
This school is not normal.
In school,
often there are people struggling quietly
and need support but don't ask for it.
Salish is about to find herself
in a situation
where somebody is struggling.
She will have the opportunity to help,
but will she do it?
I don't know what I'm gonna do
to get them back.
They pranked me. I got in trouble.
Oh my God, bro.
What? Is that the same girl?
No way, guys.
Bro, the same girl is still crying.
Oh my God, did I make her feel that bad?
I didn't do anything, guys.
Look. Bro, she's crying.
I feel so bad.
I don't know if I should dip and leave,
or should I just, like, help her?
I have to walk past her, though,
to get to my next class, okay?
Please don't let this be awkward.
Don't be awkward.
I wouldn't blame her if she walks away.
Hey, are you okay?
- Yeah.
- Are you sure? You don't look okay.
- Yeah, I'm fine.
- Are you sure?
Salish hates emotion,
but she's a compassionate person.
- [sobbing] You know what? I'm not okay.
- Oh.
So you know Gabe?
He asked me out the other day.
And we were gonna go out to the movies.
Today, he slipped you a note,
and I saw what it said, and…
Oh, I'm sorry.
She stayed. Now they're talking.
Don't worry about him. It does not matter.
I don't like him at all. Like, no.
He seems like not a good guy.
If he's doing that to you,
he probably isn't.
But you're, like, really pretty,
and you're so nice, and I just…
You're so pretty too,
and you're really sweet.
Thank you.
This is insane.
Nowhere in this script is this.
I didn't think Salish would do more
than say, "Are you okay?"
They're having a conversation.
This actor is improvising.
I mean, look at what I'm wearing,
and Gabe probably thought--
No. I don't think you should talk
about Gabe anymore.
It's not about him. It's about you.
When I'm having a bad day,
I do a makeover.
- Do you want a makeover?
- Sure.
Okay, perfect.
All right, I've got just the thing.
Wait, I'm forgetting something.
One second. Hold up.
She really is giving me a makeover.
I don't know what to do.
She's giving me a makeover?
She's decided
to give this girl a makeover now.
There's nothing in this script.
We did not see this coming.
We're gonna do your makeup,
then your outfit, everything.
It's gonna be a transformation.
First, we're gonna do some blush,
and this always makes me feel really well.
[giggling] You're putting it in my eye.
They're just chilling?
You're supposed to be in class.
I might've put a little too much.
I'm having so much fun.
You're gonna feel amazing.
We're gonna put this on
to cover up some of the pinkness
'cause I added too much.
Okay, now close your eyes.
Salish is passing this test.
Final step is some lip gloss.
[chuckling]
Okay, now, like, blend it in
with your lips, you know?
It's in my teeth.
Perfect. We're done with makeup.
How do you like it?
Wait, I look really pretty.
Yeah, you look so good.
Now we're gonna do some clothes.
Where did all those clothes come from?
I brought clothes
in case I didn't like my outfit.
Let's see if these work.
What do you think about that?
It'd go with your eyes. It's really cute.
It's really cute.
Perfect.
Let's go to the bathroom and change.
- Race you there.
- Wait. Hey, that's not fair.
I'm gonna win!
You guys didn't see what happened,
but the crying girl,
I went to her, and we figured it out.
She's getting changed.
I gave her a whole makeover.
She might be
the only normal kid at this school.
Everyone is weird, but she seems chill.
Oh… Okay, the outfit's eating, perfect.
Okay, can I have your backpack?
- Yeah, sure.
- Okay, perfect.
Put it down. Okay, so her fit check.
Shirt from Pacsun, pants from Hollister,
Converse. Perfect.
Now all you need is just a hair tie,
I think, just to get the fit fitting.
SALISH
SUMMER SCHOOL
[dramatic music]
Oh. Actually, never mind.
Let's get to class, I think.
We should get going
'cause our teacher might yell at us.
Let's go to class.
Why is she getting weird
and rushing through everything?
- [Salish] Come on, Casey.
- Okay.
[whispering] That's weird.
It looked like she saw
something in the backpack.
[dramatic music continues]
Oh, this is so weird.
Oh my gosh, that's actually so weird.
She had a paper
that had the letter S-A-L-I?
What other words could that be
except for Salish?
Salish is acting weird.
Where is she? Can someone check on her?
So it could have been the word salad,
sandwich, stylish.
No, none of those words even have S-A-L-I.
What is Salish doing? I can't hear.
It's for sure Salish.
What else would it be?
There's for real no other words.
[all clamoring]
I have a story,
but you guys have to be quiet
because Salish might come in.
I was crying at the lockers.
That was in the script.
Then she came up to me
and gave me this whole makeover,
which was super sweet.
But at the end, she got awkward,
and I don't know what that's about.
So we have to keep this on the DL.
Whoa! So you were crying about me?
Yeah, because it was in the script.
Yeah!
[cheering]
You gotta get ready,
or you're gonna give it away.
You know what? Hold on.
We have to find out where Salish is.
To see if my dad set this up,
I think I have a good idea.
Just come with me.
She's running. Stop her.
She could go anywhere.
- Salish, wait. Salish, come back here.
- What?
[groaning]
No running in the halls,
and you're late for class.
Sorry, I have to use the bathroom.
No, you have to get into class.
I got to go use the bathroom.
You should've done that between classes.
Let's go to class.
I don't know for sure,
so I have to play along with it.
Next challenge. If something is unfair,
it drives Salish crazy,
but there's unfair stuff in high school,
so let's see how she handles this one.
Sorry I'm late.
Wonderful. You made it.
- You're breaking the dress code.
- How?
The manual says
you're not allowed to have baggy jeans
with a gray zip-up hoodie.
But every… Actually, yeah, you're right.
I'm sorry. I can go change.
- Why is she being so chill?
- I'll go.
Are you kidding? I can't believe
that worked. That was easy.
Where's she going?
She's going outside towards the exit.
I just have to figure out
if my dad's here.
I have the perfect plan, so let's do this.
Okay, so I'm gonna go out
to the parking lot
and see if his car is there.
I have a couple minutes.
We have to go quick.
Oh my God, where is she?
Where? I don't see her.
I hate it when she does this.
She goes rogue.
There's a parking lot.
There's a red Tesla. No way.
I think that's my dad's license plate.
Chill.
Oh my gosh, bro,
that's my dad's license plate.
When we do hidden camera stuff, we never
put the cameras she actually goes.
How does she know this?
No way. Oh my gosh, I knew I was right!
Look, that's my dad's car.
Oh my gosh. Guys, do you see that?
No way. Let's see if he's in the car.
I'm gonna jump scare him.
[knocking]
[sucking teeth] He's not in there, look.
Okay. Well, he's not in there.
That means he's somewhere at the school,
so I'm gonna find him.
I'm gonna ring the bell.
She'll think class is over.
She'll come back to the next test, lunch.
There was too much weird stuff.
Of course he set this up.
[bell ringing]
Okay, well, that's the bell,
so I guess "lunch" is happening.
There she is. She's going back in.
Looks chill. All's good.
- Is that all you're eating?
- Yeah, are you the server?
- Yeah.
- Nice.
- Enjoy your meal.
- Thank you.
My dad's too cheap
to even hire a different server.
[indistinct chatter]
Hey guys, mind if I sit with you?
[hesitating]
- I think that's… Okay.
- Thanks.
- What is she eating?
- All I eat every day is sweets.
Did she look at the camera?
Any chance she knows what we're doing?
If Salish finds out about this,
I am toast.
Every day of the year.
At lunch, at school, she just eats sweets?
You guys all look
kind of old for high school,
but when's your birthday?
Um… It's 20…
She's asking him how old they are.
How old are these kids?
They look 20!
We're supposed to cast high school kids.
You look a little old for high school.
How old are you?
- Same age as you.
- How old are you?
I'm in summer school. I'm 19.
- Yeah, you also high school?
- Yeah.
She's probably like 20.
Wait, you guys have all been
held back four grades?
[hesitating]
It's a hard school, okay?
Chelsea, I've seen you before, right?
We've met.
- What?
- Yeah.
Like ten minutes ago in class.
No, I think we've met, yeah.
- Yeah, like an hour ago, girl.
- Huh.
Salish is acting super weird,
and Alan said trust him
that he had this scene under control,
and threw out what I wrote.
- Anyway, I heard you have a crush on Gabe.
- [laughing mockingly]
The "tease her for having a crush" thing.
- Crush!
- Crush!
- Yeah! Actually, I do.
- What?
- Gabe, can I have that note?
- Sure.
What?
- Um…
- [giggling]
- Oh, she's gonna reject him again.
- [laughing]
- Yeah.
- What's she about to do?
What is she writing?
It says "yes," if you couldn't see.
- What?
- What?
Gabe, where do you wanna go on the date?
- What?
- Oh!
Don't look at me. I don't know what to do.
[laughing forcefully]
- Yeah. Yeah, where?
- Where, Gabe?
Now she wants to date Gabe.
When did that happen?
- Yeah, where?
- Where?
- I'm good.
- Are you sure?
- Are you, like, positive?
- Wait, I'm thirsty.
Oh, oops.
[all] Oh!
- I'm so sorry.
- What?
That's mean, actually.
I mean, okay, my phone's…
Look, it's still fine.
You're good, Alan.
Accidents happen, right?
- Uh… Yeah.
- That wasn't an accident.
That was the meanest thing anybody's
done to her, and she's chilling.
- Your stuff, it's all gross now.
- No, it's not. It's fine.
- What about your muffin?
- I wasn't hungry.
She's acting weird.
Do you think she knows?
Are the cameras hidden?
Well, I'm super excited
about the party at my house tonight.
[all] Oh!
It's filled with all the cool kids,
I mean…
Let me guess, I'm not invited?
Uh… Who are you again? [laughing]
- [all laughing mockingly]
- [Alan] Let's go.
He's doing the "exclude her
from the party" thing,
which is common in high school.
Sorry.
I feel bad, her sitting alone.
They're obviously doing this
to exclude me and to see how I handle it,
but actually, if this actually happened,
I wouldn't care.
No idea what she's saying.
I hear a whisper.
But since I know my dad set all this up,
watch this.
[tense music]
What is she doing?
You know, just for cool kids.
Hey, there's something in your hair.
- There's not.
- There is. It's right there.
- What are you talking about?
- It's right there.
What?
See? Everywhere.
Why would she do that?
[shuddering] It's cold in places
that shouldn't be cold.
Salish, what are you doing?
Oh, my bad.
Should I go to the principal's office?
The principal, right? Yeah.
- I'm gonna go to the principal's office.
- Go to the office.
[Salish] Bye, see you later.
She's coming to the office?
He's not there. Do you know where he is?
Oh, and Alan, I love your videos.
[indistinct arguing]
I'm sorry, Alan, but that was too funny.
And come on, I think my dad's gonna be
in the principal's office,
so I cannot wait to find him. Let's go!
Do you know where he is?
[muted shouting] Alex! Where…
Is he in here?
Alex! He's going for a jog?
- Alex, what are you doing?
- I was just…
You can't jog. Put it on.
She's coming. Hurry!
She's losing her mind. I don't know.
She dumped a tray on a student.
She'll be in any second.
Be professional. Okay, perfect.
Wait! [panting]
SCRIP
I'm good.
Oh no. Oh my gosh.
I don't know what I… What am I doing?
Hey, Mr. Principal.
- I spilled juice over a student's head.
- She's right there.
I'm sorry.
I should be in a lot of trouble.
Let me call my dad
so that he can, like, help, you know,
help figure this out.
We've got cleaning people.
I spilled it over his head.
I should be in trouble.
- Where's my phone?
- [ringing]
I think I hear something.
Maybe the ringtone inside here?
- [screaming]
- Dad!
- Salish! Okay, calm down.
- Dad…
I did this to make sure
you can handle high school.
- Why are you in here?
- It's all for your own good!
- Dad!
- It's for your own good!
I knew it.