Max and the Midknights (2024) s01e06 Episode Script

1
[dramatic music]
♪
[whooshing]
What's wrong, Henrietta?
Another bad dream?
Oh! Guards!
- [clanking]
- Your Majesty!
Oh, no!
Oh!
[gasping] Oh, look at the--oh.
Ugh.
- Ah.
You really ought to get
some better security
around here.
Ugh, Fendra.
What is it?
Why have I been disturbed
during nap time?
Because I've lost Mumblin.
For a moment there,
I was sensing his presence.
But now, nothing.
Zilch!
I won't be bested by him.
Not again!
If I didn't know you better,
I'd think you sound
a little paranoid.
You think I'm overreacting?
Uh, no!
No, no, no, no, no.
I--I--I don't.
But uh, Henrietta here thinks
that, uh, maybe you are.
[high-pitch voice]
We are just worried about you.
- You tell Henrietta
that she underestimates Mumblin
at her peril!
If we don't find him,
he could destroy everything!
Do we understand each other?
Hen-ri-et-ta?
- Mm-hmm.
[upbeat music]
- Lotta people tellin' me
what I should be ♪
But I wanna make
my own destiny ♪
- [growls]
- Got a feelin' ♪
That it might be time
for me ♪
- To find my own way ♪
- [grunts]
- 'Cause I can feel it
in my heart ♪
It takes a lot to be brave,
but just a little to start ♪
Let's go take
a million chances ♪
Let's go change
our circumstances ♪
I'm gonna write
my own story ♪
And the hero is me ♪
♪
- [grunting] Hi-ya!
So here's the thing.
Being on a quest is awesome!
Sure we're on the road all the
time, battling the elements.
And there's--
So much walking.
But who cares about that?
Not only did we make it
out of Byjovia alive,
but there's a prophecy
about us and everything.
We are unstoppable!
[honks]
- Glad you're feeling all
the happy prophecy vibes, Max.
But maybe we should stop--
to eat?
We could eat.
But what's the point?
What's the point of anything
now that my magic's gone?
Really? Nothing still?
- Not since the bubble
that got us out of Byjovia,
which means I must not
be magic after all.
[all sighing]
Oh, magic gods,
why have you forsaken me?
Don't lose hope, Millie.
You did magic once.
Surely you'll do it again.
- Kevyn's right.
You'll get your magic working.
Remember,
with the prophecy on our side,
what could go wrong?
We're out of food.
[gasps]
Egad!
We'll starve!
- [belches]
Might I recommend worms?
[slurping]
[belches]
- Nope. Nuh-uh.
Worms won't cut it.
Not enough fiber.
[sighs] We'll just
have to eat one of us.
All right, might as well be me.
If I'm not magic anymore,
what--what good am I anyway?
Right? Have at it.
- And on day nine,
due to a dearth of food,
the Midknights were forced
to eat one of their own.
- I knew I should have
sent the kids off
with a few more sandwiches.
Ooh!
[clanking, shouting]
Oh.
Don't worry, Nolan.
It's just me.
Oh, good.
But look at
the latest from Kevyn.
Wait.
Eat who now?
OK.
Start here.
That's where the most meat is.
- First, you know
I'm a vegetarian.
And second,
nobody's eating anybody!
- Seriously,
everyone needs to relax.
We've got the prophecy!
And the prophecy
wouldn't let us starve.
♪
See?
What'd I tell you?
- Huh, maybe the prophecy
is looking out for us.
Of course it is!
We'll make a pit stop,
eat our fill,
then get back on the road!
Problem solved!
[slurping]
OK, do what you want.
But the offer still stands.
No hard feelings.
♪
[grunting]
Ooh?
- Wish for of all I see ♪
[grunting] No!
Nothing!
Absolutely nothing!
You?
No.
I just can't understand it.
There's no record
of a sorceress
named Fendra anywhere!
Bingo!
[whack]
Ahh! I'm OK!
- It's like she just
appeared out of thin air!
- I'm so lonely
without you ♪
- Come on, Midknights,
let's eat.
Be right in.
Just have to use
the little goose's room.
[farting]
[indistinct grumbling]
- Don't you talk
that way to me.
[door creaking]
all: Hmm?
♪
Uh
- Real friendly place
they got here.
Is there a reason why
everyone's, like,
scowling at us?
What do you want?
- Five cups of water
and some of that
world-famous curry, please.
You don't say.
Listen up, everyone.
Our new guests here want food!
[laughter]
Pardon me, good sir.
But this is a tavern,
is it not?
Aye, it's a tavern.
But we ain't got no food,
ever since that nitwit Ghastly
shut down all trade
going in and out of Byjovia
trying to catch some outlaws
or some such.
Outlaws, you say?
Don't know anything about that.
- Yeah, we're the opposite
of outlaws!
We're in-laws!
I mean, we're not related.
But uh--I'll stop talking.
- Uh
- As I was saying,
we can't get no provisions
from the north neither
on account
of those pesky trolls
that keep robbing the wagons!
Trolls?
As in real trolls?
Of course, real trolls!
They operate a toll bridge
just over yonder.
- Uh, I thought
trolls were made-up stuff
from fairy tales.
Oh, no, Max.
I assure you they're real.
Remember,
we're in the north now,
where such magical creatures
actually exist.
- Except[grunts]
This creature.
[grunting]
Me, who isn't magical.
Hey.
[door creaking]
Whew!
I feel about 5 pounds lighter,
if you know what I--uh
[slurping]
[laughs]
Yeah, I know I'm a goose.
[laughs]
Friends, friends,
friends, friends, I--
I apologize for
the rude reception before.
Allow me to make it up
to you by giving you
the best table in the house.
And here's
a complimentary bottle
of my signature
magic seasoning!
Magic seasoning?
Thanks.
You bet!
Even autographed it for you.
This way.
- Pretty abrupt mood shift,
don't you think?
- Like I've been saying,
with the prophecy on our side,
everything's gonna be a-OK.
[thudding]
[squawking]
Wait!
- What?
- Max!
- You were saying?
- Ah!
[grunting]
Give me back my goose--
Uncle Budrick!
Sorry, girlie.
I haven't had real food in--
oh, I don't even know how long!
No, this goose is getting
seasoned, cooked, and eaten!
Hey!
[cheers, laughter]
Listen, it's a long story.
Mishap with a wizard,
but I'm not really a goose!
I'm a man!
I'm a troubadour!
- Two wings, a beak--
you're a goose!
Don't do it! Don't cook him.
We uh--we'll get you
something else to eat!
[scoffs]
There is nothing else to eat.
Haven't you been listening?
The trolls!
You said yourself, they've been
stealing all your food.
What if we got it back for you?
- [laughs] Yeah, yeah,
good luck with that.
Just give me a little time.
We'll go talk to the trolls,
get them to stop stealing
your food.
Just promise me you won't eat
my Uncle Budrick.
All right, agreed.
No!
You have 24 hours,
but only because
a bird this size
needs a full day to marinate.
- We have to go talk
to these trolls.
Max, is that wise?
According to the literature
I've read,
trolls are enormous
temperamental creatures.
It will be fine.
Remember, we have
the prophecy on our side.
[sighs]
[suspenseful music]
♪
- Think we're in
the right spot?
- Uh
- Hmm.
- [footsteps banging]
- Ah!
- Ah!
- Ah!
[dramatic music]
♪
[troll growling]
[troll roaring]
Welcome, travelers, welcome.
Do you seek passage
over our bridge?
[all groaning]
Hmm?
No, actually.
We are here
about all the food
you've been stealing.
Stealing, right.
All right, here we go
with the stealing.
It wasn't stealing, OK?
Those folks couldn't pay
the toll,
so they forfeited their food.
I think you would agree
that fair is fair, right?
Fair is fair.
[laughs]
- Well, I don't know
if it is fair.
There's a bunch of hungry
people back at the tavern.
Ever think about sharing?
Easy, Max.
Let's not pick a fight with
giant, potentially dangerous
creatures.
- Listen.
Graugnar and I don't share.
No, we have a more,
um--what do you call,
a transactional way
of doing things.
So if you want the food,
which it sounds like you do,
you're gonna have to pay
the toll.
And by toll, I mean
[chuckles] Answer a riddle.
[cackling]
- So you're saying
if we answer a riddle,
we can get the food back?
- Uh-huh.
[both cackling]
Then we'll answer a riddle.
- Uh, shouldn't we, you know,
find out what happens
if we can't solve the riddle?
I'm assuming
it's something bad.
Relax, Simon. It'll be fine.
- Oh, you mean because we have
a prophecy on our side?
Yes, that.
And we also have a Kevyn.
Yes, please.
It's not every day
that one gets
to match wits with a troll.
[both cackling]
Mm, let's see.
Ooh, I know.
I'm gonna go with a classic.
[clearing throat] OK.
What goes on four legs
in the morning,
two legs at noon,
and three legs in the evening?
Yeah, good one, Jack.
They'll never get that one.
- The mention of morning,
noon, and night
is undoubtedly
a reference to time
and, if I may extrapolate, age.
Therefore, I believe
the correct response
is a human,
crawling on all fours
as a baby,
two legs as an adult,
and three legs when old age
makes use of a walking stick
necessary.
Is that correct?
Aw, he get it.
What did I tell you?
What we do, Jack?
This no happen before.
- Yeah. I uh--
well, I guess we ask him
another riddle.
Oh, no way!
A candle.
Come on.
- A spider.
- How did they--
A Labradoodle?
Stop with that stuff.
The doctor was a woman.
Oh, you're cheating.
I know you're cheating.
Aw, no fair.
- Well played, gentlemen.
- Mm-hmm.
- Yeah, it's been
a real hoot, guys, but--
- Whoa, whoa, whoa,
not so fast.
[all gasping]
- Uh-huh, you not go nowhere.
Hold on, we had a deal!
[all screaming]
This is hopeless!
No one's ever heard of her.
And the bookshelves here
are full of nothing
but romance novels
and predictable
murder mysteries!
[bleats]
No!
I thought the barber did it.
I mean, he clearly planted
those fingerprints.
Oh, never mind!
The point is, I need
to find more books
to consult, and the only--
wait a minute.
[soft music playing on radio]
[door creaking]
Oh!
Oop, wrong door.
[whirring]
[bleats]
- I'm so lonely
without you ♪
[soft music]
♪
[whirring]
Oh, come to think of it,
I should have
suggested we use
this portal to get
Uncle Budrick
out of the dungeon.
Oh, well.
Now, let me see.
- [whimpering]
Oh, oh, no, oh!
There, there,
my dear Henrietta.
I know you miss Edmund,
as do I.
I've sent out a search party,
and I'll let you know
the moment I hear.
I won't let my right hand man
be gone for long!
[laughing]
See what I did there?
Enough!
Ah!
Hmm, while we're here
talking to your
beady-eyed feet warmers,
Mumblin could be--
[sniffing] Wait.
What's that smell?
Oh, probably the socks.
My last jester had
unusually sweaty feet.
- It's not the socks,
you moron.
It's[gasps] Mumblin!
[whooshing]
Don't worry, Henrietta.
I don't think your eyes
are beady at all.
Ah, Henrietta!
Guards!
[humming]
- Did it say anything
about being boiled alive
in that prophecy of yours?
Huh? Huh, Max?
Look at me
when I'm huh-ing you.
Huh?
OK, OK. You're right.
I may have gotten
a little carried away
with the whole prophecy thing.
- Yeah.
- Indubitably.
A little bit.
[scraping]
OK.
I might be able to cut
through these ropes.
But it's gonna take
a little time.
- Time, unfortunately,
is something
we don't possess in abundance.
[troll growling]
Ah! I believe this
is the book I need.
[whirring]
[whooshing]
Ahh!
[scraping]
- This wasn't
supposed to happen.
I'm supposed to slay a dragon,
find King Conrad,
and save Byjovia.
Not become stew!
And Uncle Budrick might be
a nugget by now!
- What was I thinking?
- [gasps]
It's OK, Max.
Focus on those ropes.
And I'll distract the trolls.
[troll mumbling]
SoGraugnar, was it?
What happened
to your tooth there?
Tragic flossing accident?
- Uh--oh!
Well, a witch stole my tooth.
Scary lady.
A witch?
How fascinating.
What would a witch want
with a troll's tooth?
[dramatic music]
[flames crackling]
[crowd chanting]
Goose! Goose! Goose! Goose!
Wait!
[thudding]
[honking]
I mean, please, don't cook me.
I beg you.
I'm, uh--I'm not ready!
I'm not tender enough.
[honking]
What about the marinade?
Sorry, but it's time.
[honking]
What am I thinking?
My magic seasoning!
♪
- How are those ropes
coming, Max?
Almost there.
Psst.
Millie, what's that?
- I thought it might help
get my magic back.
But it's not working.
- That's because
it's not actually magic.
It's salt.
Forget about the seasoning
and distract the trolls!
How about another riddle?
Good thinking, Simon.
[clears throat]
Excuse me, gentlemen.
Mm?
- Before you feast
upon our boiled flesh,
we thought you might enjoy
one final riddle.
Uh, what? Uh, no.
I mean, we never had food offer
to tell us a riddle before.
But uh, what do you think,
Graugnar?
Riddle!
- What do you get when you mix
carrots, broccoli, ginger,
onions, garlic, coconut,
curry powder,
and chef's magic seasoning?
Uh, ehI don't know.
- Yeah, we are not familiar
with this one as such.
- [scraping]
- [grunting] Yes.
Here's an idea.
Well, since you have
all the ingredients
just conveniently there,
why don't you just
mix everything together?
I don't know. See what happens.
- Well,
it's a little unorthodox.
But hey, we got to know
the answer, so
[all grunting]
♪
Hey, what was
that last thing again?
Here you go.
Magic seasoning?
Whoa, whoa, whoa, wait.
You should be tied up.
- [grunts]
Maybe this'll teach you
not to play with your food.
I know, I know,
but I had to say it.
[grunting]
♪
[trolls growling]
Food fight!
[all grunting]
♪
[trolls growling]
♪
[yelling]
♪
[trolls roaring]
[page rustling]
Oh, drat!
I grabbed the wrong one!
[whirring]
[books clattering]
Ahh!
[grunts] Whoa!
[laughing]
- Would it make any difference
at all if I told you
there's a prophecy about us?
[troll growling]
Guess not.
[screaming]
I'll eat you first.
Wait.
You still didn't answer
our riddle.
What do you get when you mix
those ingredients?
Vegetarian curry!
Ah, oh!
- Whoa!
- Mm.
[laughs]
What are you doing?
Get them!
[slurping]
Jack, try curry.
Curry good!
- Curry is--
[slurping, gulping]
Wow, that is delicious!
Why have we been eating humans
all this time,
when we could have been
eating this stuff?
[slurping]
Yeah. Ahh.
[slurping]
I guess that sign was right.
Try the curry, and you'll never
want to eat anything else.
Egad!
Perhaps this is
the prophecy at work.
Forget the prophecy.
This was all Simon.
If not for him,
our gooses would be--[gasps]
Uncle Budrick!
- [flames crackling]
- [honking]
[thudding]
[crashing]
No.
Stop!
[all gasping]
[trolls growling]
[all gasping]
I told you we'd get
your stolen food.
Well, mission accomplished!
[all gasping]
[cheering]
- Then the witch pulled out
my tooth, she did.
Eh, wrong.
The answer is 13.
Oh, it's so yummy!
[belches]
Oh!
- I'm never eating again
until tomorrow.
Obviously.
Millie, look!
- [gasps]
Oh, my magic, it's back!
- Perhaps the problem
was simply
that you were hungry, Millie.
More curry, anyone?
Yes, please.
Don't mind if I do.
[triumphant music]
♪
So what'll it be?
One last riddle?
Oh, come on.
We let friends cross for free!
[laughs] Uh, just this once.
Aw, come here.
Graugnar shake. [chuckles]
Oh!
[laughs]
- All in all,
that turned out pretty good.
- Yeah, but couldn't hurt
to be a little more careful.
Just because there's a prophecy
doesn't mean this is
gonna be easy.
And too many people
are counting on us.
[tense music]
♪
Ugh.
Ahh!
Where is that bearded buffoon?
Mm.
What have we here?
[laughing]
♪
- Of all I wish for ♪
Of all I've seen ♪
There's one thing
I want returned to me ♪
I said doo-doo-doo-doo-doo,
I'm lonely without you ♪
Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh ♪
I'm so lonely without you ♪