Sausage Party: Foodtopia (2024) s02e01 Episode Script

1
[vibrant orchestral music]
Foodtopia ♪
[birds chirping]
[yawns]
[inspiring music playing]
Hey, look, it's Frank. Hi, Frank.
-[food 1] Yeah, Frank.
-[food 2] Oh, look!
-All right!
-[foods clamoring]
[food 3] I love you!
Ain’t no dog hotter than you, bruh.
[all] Dear Frank ♪
You really turned our lives around ♪
When you took control
And fixed our town ♪
Frank, you're the fuckin' best, man!
Don't mention it.
Dear Frank ♪
You made us one big family ♪
[all] When you brought us peace
And harmony ♪
I'm just happy you're happy.
You outlawed teeth, so we're equal now ♪
Don't be modest, take a bow ♪
We're linin' up to blow your horn ♪
'Cause you're the greatest sausage
Ever born ♪
Every day's a perfect day
In Foodtopia ♪
Topia ♪
Every day's a perfect day ♪
-Thanks to Frank ♪
-[laughs] Yeah!
-[food 4] Thanks, Frank.
-Isn't he the best, guys?
You made all of our dreams
Come true ♪
And it's all because of you ♪
So the only thing that’s left
For us to do ♪
Is thank Frank! ♪
Danke, Frank.
[crowd] Thanks, Frank.
Hey, Frank! ♪
The fridges were your best plan yet ♪
We fuck all day
And don't break a sweat ♪
Thanks, Frank.
-Get it, y'all.
-[food 5] Gosh, what a great wiener.
Yeah, Frank ♪
While the spinach
Gets their salad tossed ♪
Watch me whip up a batch of applesauce! ♪
Maybe later.
I'll watch.
I can cup my nuts ♪
I can spill my seed ♪
I can treat them gum-balls
Like anal beads ♪
With crackers and cheese
To share the load ♪
Just shake your cans
And we'll explode ♪
Every day's a perfect day
In Foodtopia ♪
Topia ♪
Every day's a perfect day
Thanks to Frank ♪
[Jack] Oh, hey, Frank.
Whoo! I am lovin’ these wagon rides!
You a genius for this one, Frank.
Genius? I don't know if I'm a genius.
Maybe!
Getting around town is such a breeze,
thanks to these hot little numbers.
-Whoa!
-[Frank] Fly Rutabaga! Fly!
We got fucking jetpacks.
Could this town get any better?
Frank, I'm so happy you asked that.
'Cause it can get better.
It worked, Frank. We can bring her back.
[inspirational music playing]
[Frank] Oh, Brenda.
It's really you.
I can't believe it.
Look! Look, Brenda,
look at what we achieved.
It’s Foodtopia. The way we dreamed.
Oh! Fuck, no!
[gasps]
You had that Brenda turning
to mush dream again, didn't you?
Maybe.
I'm no dream expert,
but I think it might symbolize
that you're still pretty sad
about Brenda dying and turning to mush.
[sputters] We don't need to
get into all that.
You know? I'm good. It's changeover time.
Are you ready?
[battle music playing]
[snorting]
Now I am.
[dramatic music playing]
[groans] It's so hot. I can't even whip up
a batch of applesauce.
[megaphone feedback]
[foods gasping]
All right, everyone!
You know what that sound means.
Everyone's favorite thing to do.
Time to share!
Man, this is ridiculous. Two days ago,
I spent 30 chompers on this thing.
[refrigerator whirring]
[megaphone feedback]
[food groaning]
Already?
Look, I know, I know.
I know, but this is the only way to ensure
that everyone who needs it
gets equal fridge time.
Eat a dick, Frank.
-[Small Milk thuds]
-[both gasp]
Jeez, we need our smiles back.
[xylophone playing]
That's it!
Hey, Frank. I just thought of a song
for my one-bagel show
that I’ve been telling you about.
Now I know what you're going to say.
The Greatest Doughman isn't important
right now, but it should be.
Foods need entertainment,
and the screens are being under-utilized.
Sammy, we've been over this.
We need foods focused and working
for a better tomorrow,
not sitting around, staring at the screens
like a bunch of couch potatoes.
-Hey!
-You know what? I won't apologize.
You know what you are. Get up!
But, Frank
Sammy, can't you see that Frank
already has too much on his plate?
[foods gasp]
Oh, the-the P-word.
[sputters] I shouldn't have worded it
like that. I am so sorry.
You should be.
Plates are like death beds to us, okay?
The porcelain grave.
Horrible choice of wording aside,
Jack is right.
Ugh, see? Fuck.
You see what I'm dealing with here?
Hey, Peaches, come on.
You know we don't have the capacity
to put cans in fridges yet.
This is so unfair.
How come clingstone peach over there
gets time in the crisper and I don't?
Clingstones need fridge time.
They don't just want it.
They're fleshier, they bruise easily.
Mm-hmm, they bruise like peaches.
It is just temporary, okay?
Once my cool zone expansion plan
aka Cool World is complete,
there will be fridges for all.
You'll be thanking me. Who knows?
Maybe, you will be inspired to, like,
write a song about me,
and maybe it'll go like
Thank Frank
Thank Frank ♪
Who knows, though? That's just an example.
Point is, there's fridges on the horizon!
["Also sprach Zarathustra" playing]
[foods groaning]
[grunts]
[food screams]
-[foods grunting]
-[Frank] We're almost there, everybody!
[food grunting]
[grunting continues]
I can hardly feel
the pain in my phantom toe.
[grunts]
Because of the adrenaline.
Ugh. Goddamn, Frank. Forcing us to work
alongside our former oppressor.
Man, fuck this.
No-no-no-no! Hold the line! [grunts]
But if they let go,
all the weight’ll be transferred to
[grunts, yells]
[Frank yelling]
[grunts]
[Jack yelling]
[grunts]
[sobbing]
We were right there
That fridge could’ve cooled hundreds
of foods, it had a double crisper.
That's twice the crisp.
[Jack groaning]
What the hell?
Why'd you all drop the rope?
It slipped.
[Frank] Oh, fuck off, Iced Tea.
It didn’t slip out of all your hands
at the exact same time.
Don't you realize the goal
we're working towards?
It helps everybody. We're so close.
Just please get on board already.
All right. Shift's over, everyone.
You can all go back
to doing your own thing.
He's right.
You should all get some rest
and do your own thing.
Until sun-up,
and then you all have to come back here
to help build Cool World.
Fuck.
-Hmm, you know, one quick thought.
-No screen time, Sammy.
[dramatic music playing]
Hey, Carmine.
Hey, Patty.
How's it hangin', Raul?
You know me, long and stringy.
[laughing] I hear that, stretch!
[spray paint can shaking]
[paint spraying]
[tense music playing]
[foods clamoring]
Oh, come on. Again with this?
[sighs] All right,
let's see what you've cooked up this time.
Oh, real creative.
"Hot-doggy style," pretty obvious.
"Seated sausage," played out.
This one with Frank starting out
in Jack’s armpit
and ending in the taint
is pretty inventive, I’ll say.
But still, this needs to stop.
Every food in town knows what
they're doing to each other
behind closed doors.
They're not doing that
anymore.
I heard Frank sleeps
in the humey's waistband
and uses his shaft as a body pillow.
I heard he tucks
under the humey’s ball skin as a blanket.
He uses one ball as a pillow
and the other ball
as a little bedside table.
Okay, first of all,
these rumors are insane.
A ball as a bedside table,
that'd never work.
All the stuff would keep falling off it.
And also these rumors
are detrimental to the public good.
We're trying to come together.
You mean like Frank and the humey do?
[chuckles]
Walked right into that one.
It’s not just that, Bar’ Bar’,
it’s this whole awful place
he’s forcing us to toil away in!
I'm sick and tired of it.
It's time we fight the real enemy.
Can you stop ripping up pictures
of Frank and saying that all the time?
He's not the enemy.
His heart's in the right place.
There's no more slums,
he's got us all sharing,
cars for everyone.
Foods are way better off
than they were before.
And all it cost
was everyone’s freedom.
[dramatic music playing]
He's a genuinely stupid bastard.
[grunting]
-[deep exhale]
-[Frank] You all right, Jack?
I think strapping myself to those fridges
is startin' to take a toll.
[groaning]
Speaking of which,
you think it'd be possible for me
to get a little time
in the walk-in fridge tomorrow?
Or maybe you could just pass
an executive order
to make some Italian ices dance
on my back or something?
[groans]
Uh, you fucking kidding me?
That would be a PR nightmare.
My back hurts too, okay.
The chair in the shaded canopy
is a cheap piece of shit.
Frank. This isn't working.
What isn't working?
This. All of this.
The whole forced sharing thing,
the Cool Zone expansion.
Morale's never been lower.
Something's gotta change.
I hear complaints all day
from all these fuckers.
I don't need to hear them from you, too.
No, look, it’s not just him, Frank.
I'm I'm tired of having
no creative freedom here.
I need I need change.
Remember how my grief-based denial
turned me into a selfish monster
last season?
[mouthing]
Summer?
Yeah, well, anyway, that's why
I'm determined to acknowledge my pain
and use my art
to heal properly this season
Autumn?
Stop pitching your one-bagel show.
I believe in what we're doing here.
And if the well-being of Foodtopia
needs to come at the cost
of some foods' happiness,
it is worth it to me.
It's not just a few, Frank.
Most of the foods are unhappy.
They’re sick of you ruling them
from above in your giant ivory tower.
Ivory? Yep. [chuckles]
I am looking pretty pale lately.
I suspect the cannibalism has taken
all the pigmentation out of my skin.
I have to ride on Jack's head.
You think I like it?
There's a target on my back.
You have a target on your back
because you're riding on Jack's head.
Well, now you’re just in
a chicken and egg debate.
And those two putzes bicker non-stop,
they never get anywhere.
We need Jack to enforce the rules.
He's our strongman.
[groaning]
Face it, you can't expect foods to be okay
with a humey being part of our society.
It's unnatural.
It's just gonna breed more contempt.
[soft music playing]
Brenda envisioned a town
where everyone's needs would be met,
not based on the color of their teeth,
but the contents of their packaging.
And if we don't achieve that,
then she died for nothing,
and I can't let that happen.
Jack, let's go. I need to think.
Let's go for a jog.
As you wish.
-[back cracks]
-[grunts]
[screams in pain]
[groaning]
You know, I know
he’s still broken up over it,
I mean, we've all lost lovers,
but how many times
can the guy play the Brenda card?
It's getting ridiculous. He never listens.
Just keeps expecting me
to blindly support him
and keep narcing out my fellow food
like it’s some kind of compulsion
Holy shit, you see that?
[suspenseful music playing]
I'm not liking that lighting or that gate.
Sinead O’Potato
must be up to something.
Yeah, her and that handsome,
sexy donut, Duncan.
I hate that motherfucker.
[music continues]
[whispering] Psst, Barry.
Barry.
[shouts] Barry!
[sputters] Oh, I just wanted to say,
I've never been on a stakeout before.
I mean, I’ve eaten a steak out, but
Yeah, I know, I watched the whole thing.
Try to keep quiet.
No, of course. Of course.
[Sammy sputtering]
It's so nerve wracking.
I mean, one wrong move
and I could blow our cover.
[loud drum playing]
Oh, shit!
G-get ‘em, Bar'!
[Barry panting]
[both groan]
[Duncan grunts]
Busted, my babies.
What new hypothetical sexual position
have you conjured Frank in now?
Toes in ass?
Butt to chest?
[tense music playing]
For the love of cod,
what are you planning here?
[grunts] Uh, surprise birthday bash?
Don't be surprised if I bash your face
into the pavement, dough boy.
Hey, love the intensity
and, you know, the wordplay.
Muah!
But just, easy on the dough slurs.
I haven’t been to Shopwell’s in a while.
Might have to go take
a stroll down memory lane.
This is bigger than you think, Bar'.
It ain’t just the two of us
that’ve had our fill of Frank’s regime.
Oh, then I guess it really is a party.
Maybe I'll have to dress up
for the occasion.
Do I want a bunch of foods in town
to hate me?
Of course not.
But am I willing to have them hate me
to make the town better?
I guess.
Can't say I'm too thrilled
about how I'm being depicted
in all this sex graffiti.
I mean, some of it really captures me.
I think I'm just easy to draw, you know?
I’m just like a long oval with eyes,
essentially.
But it's really being weaponized.
You see what that new one has me doing?
[sing-songy] My ears are burning.
Wow, even that won't cheer you up, huh?
You're under a lot of stress. Come here.
Lay on your tummy.
[moaning] That's good.
[chuckles]
Speaking of the graffiti,
I saw one panel where we were
lightly caressing each other's bodies
with crows' feathers.
You know, it's actually very tasteful
compared to the next panel
where you're shoving the feathers
up my ass
to make me look like a turkey.
[chuckles] But I don't know.
It might be a fun way
to relieve stress.
Yeah, I'm still kind of
Just not really ready
for that kind of stuff.
Oh, yeah. Totally.
I don't understand the erotic appeal
of crows' feathers either.
No, I'm not
I'm not not horny
because of the feathers.
It's it's Brenda.
Oh, the Brenda card again?
Hey, Frank,
I've been thinking about what Barry said.
Do you think the fact
that I'm currently viewed
as a scary human dragon
is gonna make it harder for me
to integrate into Foodtopia one day?
I mean
No?
Ah, that's good.
So, when do you figure
I could stop being a dragon?
'Cause you said
it would only be for a bit.
Yeah, and that's how long it's been.
It's just been a bit.
And we just need a few more bits,
and then we'll be there.
And once we're there,
all that fear and that rage,
anger and hatred that they feel
when they look at you,
it will melt away and it will turn into
Love?
Um, I was going to say apathy
or indifference, but um
Yeah. Let's go with love.
[toy train engine chugging]
[Sammy] Touch more here. Chiaroscuro
in the brush strokes
Yep, a few more touches.
And voila!
[Barry] Wildly impressed that you were
able to pull this off so fast.
When you’re as creatively stifled
as I am, it just, uh
Art just pours out of you.
Okay, we got the look. Now, uh
[muffled straining]
How’s your Sinead O’Potato "impersonato?"
Lay it on me.
[mimics Sinead poorly] Oh, you know?
Me not too shabby there.
Me mama’s doin’ grand,
-she’s recoverin’ from her illness.
-Oy.
[regular voice]
I don’t have a handle on it.
I need a little time to workshop it,
to be honest.
Um, let me do most of the talking.
[dramatic music playing]
[Rutabaga sighs] Can we start
while we're young?
We need Duncan and Sinead
to go over the plans.
They have the route mapped out.
I got a bad feeling about this, man.
They should have been here by now.
This is gonna work, okay?
[Iced Tea] Man, fuck this.
Everyone, just be cool.
What? I was born cool, bitch.
I’m iced.
Order! Order!
[gavel squeaks]
It's Frank you should be
holding in contempt,
not each other!
[tense music playing]
Finally!
What took you so long?
[mimics Duncan] Oh, a donut never tells.
[mimics Sinead] We had to make sure
we weren't tailed, didn't we?
We got the map. What more do you want
from us, ya wee bugger?
[ominous music playing]
Ah, I apologize. I’ve been a bit on edge
ever since Jeri Rice body snatched me.
But now I have this ass patch, so I should
learn to be a little bit more trusting.
All right, let's see what we got.
You want to walk us through the plan?
Considering we went through
the trouble of drawing this,
you know, very helpful map,
I think it's only, you know, right,
that one of you walk us
through the, you know, step-by-step plan.
[ominous music playing]
It just feels like we're doing
all the legwork here.
[sighs] Fine, I’ll do it.
[gavel squeaks]
First, we lure Barry away
from the Electronics Store
with another illicit mural.
Once he’s gone, we go into the store
kill Frank and his wretched humey
in their sleep
and escape
through the highlighted route
[gavel squeaks]
Easy as me.
[tense music playing]
[mimics Duncan] The plan is to
kill Frank?
I don't see
why you'd even ask that question
when you helped create the plan.
[mimics Sinead] I think what Duncan is
trying to say is, while we can all agree
that Frank's been a little bastard,
does he really deserve to die for it?
And can we all live with ourselves
for doin' the dirty deed?
That's why I made sure one of these knives
is a decoy with a retractable blade.
That way, each of us can sleep at night
knowing there's a one in ten chance
we didn't deliver the fatal stabbing.
Sound logic.
So nobody's having second thoughts here?
Maybe we revisit this
at the top of the morning
after we've had a proper wink?
[suspenseful music playing]
You know, back in my days on the force,
there was a case where a food
had the audacity
to commit a robbery in potato head.
Potato head, ya say? That’s despicable.
Sho' is.
[panicked grunting]
[all gasp]
[regular voice] Oh, no. I mean
[mimics Duncan] Oh, no.
You stupid motherfucker.
Take it easy. I don't wanna hurt you.
You can't, bitch. That's the decoy knife.
All right, I'm putting it down.
I'm putting it down.
Now, I know you're all frustrated.
I know that.
But killing Frank isn't the answer.
Things are going to get better here.
When, huh? When?
We're tired of being controlled by Frank.
It's like the second
I got the rice out of my ass,
a hot dog went up it.
Figuratively speaking, of course.
But it still hurts, Barry. It still hurts.
[Rutabaga] Julius is right.
Frank's gotta go.
[suspenseful music playing]
D'ah! Are you fucking serious?!
What the hell?
I told you not to come in my room, ever.
[yawns] Hi, Barry. Hey, is that you?
What's wrong, you have a
you have a nightmare?
Yeah, I'm having one right now, baby.
Duncan was right.
You do sleep in his undies.
Whatever. I have nothing to be ashamed of.
It's crazy cozy in here.
Do you want to hear something cute?
[chuckles]
I call them my sleep tighty whities.
Oh, yeah, that's fucking adorable.
There's a plot to kill you guys!
What?! Who wants to kill us?
Everyone. Julius, Duncan, Sinead,
Rutabaga, Pie, Iced Tea.
We need to get you out of here.
[Jack grunting]
Guys, can’t find my mouthguard.
There’s no time for any of that shit!
We have to go now.
[dramatic music playing]
[panicked grunts]
Ah! Duncan Donut!
Jack, kick him against the dumpster!
Ow! Oh, right in the schmekel.
Right, okay, that’s on me.
I forgot to de-sprinkle.
Any sign?
No. Coast is clear.
[tense music playing]
[panting]
[straining] We're gonna make it.
[music continues]
[grunts]
What the hell?
We're sorry, Frank.
It was the only way
they wouldn't kill you.
[somber music playing]
We managed to negotiate them
down to a light exile.
You can't exile me!
Jack, get me back in there.
Uh, how? It's locked.
Well, climb it.
[grunts, groans]
-[foods laughing]
-What a loser!
Ha-ha! Laugh! It's not funny.
The gates were designed
to keep humans out
-[groaning]
-[Iced Tea grunting]
[pained screaming]
[Frank grunting]
I can’t believe you’d do this to me.
You double-crossed me.
Look, baby, you need to just
take this one on the chin, okay?
Just give me some time
to smooth things over.
Trust me, these foods will listen to me.
[grunting]
Hey, what? Ah! Hey!
You can stay the fuck out, too.
The fuck, Duncan?
Now you’re double-crossing us?
This just in. It's a quadruple-cross.
We double-crossed both of you
at the same fucking time.
What the hell did we do?
Are you kidding?
You were in his government.
Also, it’s hard to trust you
now that we know
that you're willing to double-cross
your best friend. Ugh, shameful.
And if any of y'all ever
come back here again
tell 'em, Rutabaga.
Hmm, you're dead meat.
And a dead bagel!
[gavel squeaks]
[dramatic music playing]
[Jack] Really wish I grabbed
a couple ears for the road.
[triumphant music plays]