Adventure Time with Finn & Jake s09e18 Episode Script

Bonnibel Bubblegum

1 [GASPS.]
Whew.
A goblet of sparkling apple juice for milady.
Thanks, Finn.
Hey where'd you get this goblet? Oh, uh, I think we won it in a fight with an octopus we were fighting in, like, a sea cave full of treasure? No.
It was from when BMO was playing dress-up.
It reminds me of a cup my uncle used to have.
You mean your Uncle Gumbald, right? Do tell.
You never talk about your family.
I don't know.
Families are tricky.
You guys know what I mean, right? We have to go back a ways Like 800 years ago [WHIRS, BEEPS.]
[GLASS SHATTERS.]
[SIGHS.]
GOBLIN: Help! Help me! Oh, goodness me.
Someone please help me.
I'm a defenseless little goblin surrounded by all this loot.
Boo-hoo.
[ANIMAL GRUNTS.]
Oh, you poor thing, here.
Have a drink to ease your nerves while I untie you.
Pfft! Aah! The time for faking is over now.
Give me all your stuff.
[CHUCKLES.]
What? You brought a peashooter to a techno-harpoon fight?! [SNAP.]
Aah! [GROANS.]
Aah-aah-aaah! [SLURPING.]
Mm? Another close call today, Neddy.
[SQUEALS.]
[WHIMPERS.]
Neddy, you sweet chicken.
[BEATBOXING.]
It was a lot different back in the Mother Gum.
We all had each other's backs.
I'm going to make more of us, Neddy.
I know you don't care, and that's fine.
But I need to be around people like me.
O-kay! This is it, Neddy.
We're getting relatives! [ELECTRICITY CRACKLES.]
[WHIMPERS.]
[GRUNTS.]
[SIZZLING.]
[LAUGHS.]
It worked! Your name is Aunt Lolly! A pleasure to meet you, dear.
And you're Cousin Chicle.
You're a full 2.
3 meters tall.
Naturally I am a gentleman of high standing.
Oh, Cousin Chicle.
And finally Uncle Gumbald! This is your favorite mug.
Ah, yes.
I'm your great uncle.
The mug proclaims it so.
Aren't they great, Neddy? You'll be my protectors, my advisers, my family.
[WHIMPERS.]
Hmm.
I'm heading out, Neddy.
What? What? What?! Morning, small niece.
Uncle Gumbald, the taffy trees are gone! I know.
I chopped 'em down last night.
Yesterday, I realized these trees were not being utilized to their full potential, so I elected to build this cabin.
This is but the first step in building my glorious new candy city.
I've already drawn up the plans for it.
All of this will be apartments.
And did you notice the family crest I designed? It's a "G" for, uh"Gum.
" Why does it look like your head? [LAUGHS.]
You're such a curious little girl.
We're a lifestyle brand now.
[GRUNTS.]
Success! Now instead of worrying about his dumb city, Uncle can come here to picnic, swim, and, uh fish! [ELECTRICITY CRACKLES.]
Welcome to life, Candyfish.
[GASPS.]
I can't breathe air! UNCLE GUMBALD: Bonnie! What have you done to my building site? I made us a butterscotch lake and a fish to live in it.
But that's where the gift shop was gonna go.
Now it's just gonna be volleyballs, water skis, and shrimp cocktails.
Sounds nice.
Did you say you "made" this creature? Come on.
You'll appreciate him more once you watch him swim around.
Bonnibel you've micromanaged me for the last time.
Huh? Hmm.
I think it's time for Bonnie to be re-branded.
Niece, now that I've had to stare at it for weeks, I've got to admit that your lake was a very good idea.
Ja! Sehr gut! Very wunderbar.
Oh, I'm so happy.
We got you a gift to say thanks.
It's right outside, Prinzessin.
[GASPS.]
You got me a car? Yes, a car.
But also a boyfriend! Hi, babe.
Beep beep! Wait, what? All right, you nut.
Have fun on your date.
Date?! [ENGINE STARTS.]
Let's go, babe.
Beep beep! [TIRES SCREECH.]
What a naive little child.
Date's over, babe.
Pick you up tomorrow to get matching tattoos.
I'm back from that terrible date.
Hello? UNCLE GUMBALD: Thank you for coming to the mandatory optimization meeting.
Tonight, we address the "Bonnie problem.
" Bonnie problem? Our future city is on course to be a rousing success, barring only one obstacle Our complete lack of competent leadership.
BB's the leader? I thought she was a mime.
'Cause I never hear a word she says.
Oh, Cousin Chicle! Oh, Cousin Chicle! Dang, Chicle, that's cold.
I have formulated a happy juice that will render her as docile and simple-minded as her cutie BF, young Mr.
Creampuff.
[GASPS.]
All we have to do is sprinkle some of this on her breakfast, and we'll be in charge.
Let us celebrate with coup d'etat cupcakes.
Poisoned cakes.
[POOF!.]
Where am I? Oh, right, the poison.
[POOF!.]
I don't know what's happening! Whee! Whee! Whee! Whee! Ah! My first candy employees.
What have you done? This isn't what I made you to be.
No, you wanted us to be lowly pet fish, swimming in your narcissistic pond.
But I am your equal! You're not like me.
You're bad.
I am the future.
Come on, Bonnie.
Don't run away from happiness.
I'm going to fix you.
And then, I'm going to fix that sniveling gumwad, Neddy.
Don't touch my brother! A pea-shooter? The juice! Nooooo! [LAUGHS.]
Hey! Where's the party? [GOOFY LAUGHTER.]
[SIGHS.]
What a mess.
But they do seem happier now So unburdened and pliable.
You, the crunchy ball, dance for me.
Sure.
Come on, lady.
Do the crunchy dance.
Oh, Crunchy.
Sure, I'll dance with my candy people.
Yay for the lady! Call me Princess.
ALL: Hurrah! Whoa, for real? Like I said, families are tricky.
[GASPS.]
BMO! Where did you get this cup? From that guy! The guy on the cup! The guy who's face is on the cup that guy!
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