'Allo 'Allo! (1982) s05e10 Episode Script

( theme music playing )
THESE PILLS I AM TAKING
ARE TO CALM MY NERVES.
I NEED THEM BECAUSE
I HAVE JUST PHOTOGRAPHED
THE MAP OF THE GERMAN PLAN
TO INVADE ENGLAND.
THE RESISTANCE ARE,
AT THIS MOMENT,
DEVELOPING THE NEGATIVE.
THE PHOTOGRAPH WAS SUPPOSED
TO BE FLOWN TO ENGLAND
ATTACHED TO THE LEG
OF A LONG DISTANCE DUCK.
UNFORTUNATELY,
THE DUCK ESCAPED,
AND IS NOW BEING HUNTED
BY MONSIEUR ALPHONSE,
THE UNDERTAKER,
AND MONSIEUR LECLERC,
THE OLD FORGER.
AH!
WHAT ARE
YOU DOING, EDITH?
I HAVE JUST BEEN DOWN
THE CELLAR,
RETURNING THE UNIFORM
OF THE FRENCH GENERAL,
WHICH WAS USED
BY THE AGENT CRABTREE.
HOW IS THE FRENCH GENERAL?
HE IS STILL PARALYZED
FROM THE RESISTANCE PILL
GIVEN TO HIM BY MIMI.
LET US HOPE
HE STAYS THAT WAY.
HE IS A COLLABORATOR,
AND DANGEROUS.
SHOULD HE REGAIN
CONSCIOUSNESS,
MIMI HAS ATTACHED A CHAIN
FROM HIS ANKLE TO A BALL.
WELL, THAT SHOULD HINDER
HIS MOVEMENTS.
( knocking )
SEE WHO IS
AT THE DOOR, QUICK.
OH, IT IS MONSIEUR ALPHONSE,
WITH A DUCK ON HIS HEAD!
COME IN, COME IN.
DID YOU CATCH
THE LONG DISTANCE DUCK?
IT IS IN THE BASKET.
IT HAS PASSED OUT.
YOU CRUEL THINGS,
WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO IT?
THE ITALIAN CAPTAIN,
HE SHOT IT.
OH MY GOD!
HOW ARE WE GOING
TO GET THE FILM TO ENGLAND?
IT IS VERY MYSTERIOUS.
THERE IS NO MARK
ON THE BODY.
NOT A FEATHER IS RUFFLED.
PERHAPS HE FAINTED
WITH FRIGHT
AT THE SOUND OF THE GUN?
DO NOT BE RIDICULOUS.
DUCKS ARE USED
TO BEING SHOT AT.
IT HAPPENS TO THEM
ALL THE TIME.
FORTUNATELY, I HAVE
MY STETHOSCOPE.
WE UNDERTAKERS
CANNOT BE TOO CAREFUL.
IF WE BURY PEOPLE
BEFORE THEY ARE DEAD,
THEY GET VERY CROSS,
AND THEY SUE US
FOR DAMAGES!
NOW, SILENCE PLEASE,
WHILE I GIVE IT A TEST.
( coughs )
OH MY GOD!
MY PILLS!
I MUST TAKE A PILL!
GIVE IT TO ME.
LET ME TRY.
- CAN YOU HEAR ANYTHING?
- SHH!
IS HE BREATHING?
BREATHING?
HE IS SNORING!
THE POOR LITTLE THING
MUST BE EXHAUSTED
FROM ALL THAT
FLYING ABOUT.
I WILL TAKE
HIS TEMPERATURE.
( duck quacks )
WELL, THAT HAS STOPPED
HIM SNORING.
IT MAY HAVE INTERRUPTED
A NICE DREAM.
YES, IT PROBABLY STARTED ONE.
FOR HEAVEN'S SAKE,
SIT DOWN, FAIRFAX.
YOU'RE LIKE
A CAGED LION.
I AM A CAGED LION.
I CAN'T STAND BEING
COOPED UP
IN A POLICE STATION
MUCH LONGER.
CRABTREE WILL
LET US OUT.
I HAVE AN IDEA
RUNNING ROUND MY HEAD.
WELL, TRIP IT UP
AND LET'S HEAR IT.
THERE'S ALWAYS A LITTLE TANK
PARKED OUTSIDE THE CAFE.
WHY DON'T WE
DRESS UP AS KRAUTS
AND STEAL IT?
CAN YOU DRIVE A TANK?
I DROVE
AN AUSTIN SEVEN ONCE.
MUST BE THE SAME PRINCIPLE.
WE COULD FIGHT OUR WAY
DOWN TO THE DOCKS,
BASH INTO THEM,
HIJACK A SUBMARINE,
AND THEN POODLE ACROSS
TO ENGLAND.
MY GOD, YOU'RE BRAVE.
YES, I AM, AREN'T I?
GOOD LUCK.
NOW, GRUBER,
I HAVE HERE A PLAN
OF THE SAWMILL,
DRAWN BY LECLERC,
THE PIANIST
AT THE CAFE.
THE ORIGINAL PAINTINGS
OF THE FALLEN MADONNA
WITH THE BIG BOOBIES
BY VAN CLOMP,
AND THE CRACKED VASE
WITH THE BIG DAISES
BY VAN GOGH,
ARE SOMEWHERE INSIDE.
HOW MANY MEMBERS
OF THE COMMUNIST RESISTANCE
ARE DEFENDING THE MILL?
WE DO NOT KNOW,
AND WE DO NOT CARE.
CAPTAIN BERTORELLI
AND HIS PLATOON
WILL LEAD
THE ASSAULT.
DO WE TELL HIM
ABOUT THE PAINTINGS?
NO. WHEN HE HAS DONE
THE DIRTY WORK,
YOU WILL BURST
THROUGH THE WALL
IN YOUR LITTLE TANK,
JUMP OUT
AND NICK THE PAINTINGS.
BUT I DO NOT KNOW
WHERE TO LOOK.
TAKE RENE WITH YOU.
HE HID THEM THERE
IN THE FIRST PLACE.
SUPPOSE HE WILL NOT
DISCLOSE THE WHEREABOUTS
OF THE PAINTINGS?
HIT HIM AND KICK HIM
UNTIL HE DOES.
DID YOU LEARN NOTHING
AT OFFICER'S
TRAINING SCHOOL?
( yelling )
CAPTAIN ALBERTO BERTORELLI!
COLONEL, MY FRIEND,
HOW ARE YOU GETTING ON, EH?
YOU'RE LATE.
I TRAIN MY TROOPS.
THEY ARE FANATICS.
THEY ARE BRAVE
FIGHTING MEN.
THEY TAKE THE BAYONET
AND THEY KILL
THE HAYSTACK.
WE HAVE A JOB
FOR THEM.
THIS IS THE MILL
WHERE THE COMMUNIST
RESISTANCE ARE HIDING.
YOU WILL CAPTURE THEM.
HOW MANY MEN
DO YOU HAVE?
I HAVE 20
OF THE FINEST
FIGHTING MEN
IN THE WORLD.
HOW MANY ARE
THE COMMUNISTS?
COLONEL, MY MEN
WILL DO THIS,
EVEN THOUGH THE ODDS
ARE AGAINST US.
COLONEL,
GENERAL VON KLINKERHOFFEN
IS HERE!
GENERAL
VON KLINKERHOFFEN!
AH, THE BIGGER THE NOISE.
( yelling )
GENERAL VON KLINKERHOFFEN!
- HEIL HITLER!
- Colonel: HEIL HITLER!
GENERAL, MY FRIEND,
HOW'S IT GETTING ON, EH?
DO NOT SPEAK UNTIL
YOU ARE SPOKEN TO.
THE TOWN UNDER YOUR COMMAND
IS A DISGRACE.
YOU HAVE THE WORST SECURITY
IN ALL OCCUPIED FRANCE.
YESTERDAY,
UNDER YOUR VERY NOSE
AN ATTEMPT WAS MADE
TO POISON THE TOP BRASS
IN THE GERMAN FORCES,
AS WE WERE MEETING TO PLAN
THE INVASION OF ENGLAND.
BUT GENERAL,
THE SUBSTANCE WAS HARMLESS.
NEXT TIME IT MAY NOT
BE HARMLESS.
NOW, WHO KNEW
OF THIS MEETING?
ONLY THE OTHER GENERALS.
ARE YOU SO STUPID
AS TO SUGGEST
WE WOULD POISON OURSELVES?
WHO ELSE?
RENE AT THE CAFE.
ARREST HIM, AND SHOOT HIM.
YES, GENERAL.
General:
NOW THEN,
HAVE YOU RECOVERED
THE PAINTINGS?
PAINTINGS?
WHAT PAINTINGS?
DID I SPEAK TO YOU?
- NO.
- THEN SHUT UP.
NO, WE HAVEN'T RECOVERED THEM,
BUT WE ARE WORKING ON IT.
IF THEY ARE NOT RETURNED
BY THE END OF THE WEEK,
YOU, TOO, WILL BE SHOT.
IS THAT CLEAR?
OF COURSE, GENERAL.
THAT IS ALL.
SEE TO IT!
IF IN THE ITALIAN ARMY
WE HAVE A GENERAL LIKE THAT,
WE TELL THE MAFIA.
WE MAKE THE CONTRACT.
HE BITE THE DUST.
I HEARD THAT!
OH, MY!
WHAT A MISTAKE TO MAKE!
NOW LISTEN, MICHELLE,
BEFORE YOU SAY THIS ONLY ONCE,
I HAVE TO TELL YOU
THE LONG DISTANCE DUCK
IS SUFFERING FROM
FEATHER FATIGUE--
IT IS IN NO CONDITION
TO FLY TO ENGLAND.
HIS JOURNEY WILL NOT
BE NECESSARY.
THE PICTURES ARE USELESS.
WE PHOTOGRAPHED THE MAP.
YES, WITH NOTHING ON IT.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN?
NO MARKS, NO ARROWS,
NO FLAGS-- NOTHING!
WHY DID YOU NOT WAI
UNTIL THEY HAD
FORMED A PLAN?
YOU ARE INCOMPETENT!
RIGHT!
THAT IS IT!
I RESIGN!
I AM NO LONGER
IN THE RESISTANCE.
I AM NO LONGER
THE BRAVEST MAN
IN ALL FRANCE.
YOU CAN TAKE
YOUR RADIO,
AND YOUR DUCK,
AND YOU CAN--
YOU CAN FIND
SOMEBODY ELSE!
YOU CANNOT
MEAN THIS.
WHAT DO YOU WANT,
A LETTER?
NO, NO, PLEASE,
RENE, STAY WITH US.
OH, RENE, HOW CAN WE
GO ON WITHOUT YOU?
IF YOU ASK ME,
A JOLLY SIGHT BETTER.
HE WAS ALWAYS A LIABILITY.
I WILL TAKE OVER FROM HIM.
YOU TAKE OVER? HA!
PLEASE, RENE,
THINK AGAIN.
- NO.
- WE ALL NEED YOU.
NO, I AM FINISHED.
LET ME SPEAK
WITH HIM ALONE.
ALONE?
ALONE.
ALONE?
ALONE.
ALONE?
ALONE.
VERY WELL.
WELL?
I ONLY HAVE ONE THING
TO SAY TO YOU.
I, TOO, CANNOT
GO ON WITHOUT YOU.
I LOVE YOU.
I ALWAYS HAVE,
AND UNTIL
THE END OF TIME,
I ALWAYS WILL.
OH MY GOD!
I WONDER WHAT
SHE IS SAYING TO HIM?
I THINK I CAN
HEAR BANGING.
I HOPE SHE IS NOT
DOING HIM A MISCHIEF.
HE NEEDS A GOOD
TALKING TO.
I THINK SHE IS
GIVING HIM ONE.
WELL
THAT IS SETTLED.
I HAVE JUST
SEEN EVERYTHING
FROM A NEW ANGLE.
I AM NOW BACK
IN MY OLD POSITION.
WE MUST GET
ON THE RADIO TO LONDON,
AND TELL THEM ABOUT
THE PHOTOGRAPHS.
MAMMA, I AM SORRY
TO DISTURB YOU,
BUT WE HAVE TO GET
ON THE WIRELESS
TO LONDON.
'ALLO, LONDON,
'ALLO, LONDON.
THIS IS NIGHTHAWK CALLING,
ARE YOU RECEIVING ME, OVER?
'Allo, Nighthawk.
There is
much interference.
( radio static )
We are trying
to rectify it.
- Hold on.
- HOLD ON, HE SAYS.
DO THEY NOT KNOW
THERE IS A WAR ON?
EDITH, EDITH.
WHAT IS IT, MAMMA?
WHY IS THERE,
IN MY BED,
ON MY HOT WATER BOTTLE,
A DUCK?
YOU WERE ASLEEP.
HE WAS SUFFERING
FROM SHOCK.
WE WERE TRYING
TO KEEP HIM WARM.
IT IS NOT A HE.
HOW DO YOU KNOW?
RENE!
IT IS A LONG DISTANCE
LADY DUCK!
PUT IT BACK
UNDER YOUR MOTHER.
DO YOU EXPECT
A POOR OLD WOMAN
TO HATCH A DUCK?
YOU WILL DO
AS YOU ARE TOLD!
YOU CRUEL MAN!
NOW YOU HAVE
MADE HER BROODY.
RENE, LIEUTENANT GRUBER
IS DOWNSTAIRS
WITH TWO STORMTROOPERS.
- THEY ARE GOING
TO ARREST YOU.
- NO!
THEY ARE COMING UPSTAIRS,
I COULD NOT STOP THEM.
OH MY GOD!
- RENE, IN THE CUPBOARD.
- YES.
HIDE THE RADIO.
BUT I HAVE NOT
SWITCHED IT OFF!
TOO LATE.
MIMI, THE SPEAKER!
OH!
MAMMA, PRETEND
TO BE DYING.
WHAT FROM?
ANYTHING.
( moaning )
( knocking )
EXCUSE ME, MADAME.
YOU HAVE COME AT A BAD TIME,
LIEUTENANT GRUBER.
MY MOTHER IS BREATHING
HER LAST BREATH,
EVEN AS I SPEAK.
( inhales loudly )
OH, EDITH.
GOODBYE, MY CHILD.
GOODBYE, YVETTE.
GOODBYE, MIMI.
GOODBYE, MICHELLE
OF THE RESISTANCE.
SHE IS DELIRIOUS.
( inhales loudly )
THERE, SHE IS GONE--
( radio static;
flatulent sound )
ALMOST.
EVEN NOW,
HER RESTLESS SPIRIT
IS LEAVING
HER MORTAL BODY.
( quacking )
IT SEEMS TO BE
HAVING DIFFICULTY
GETTING THROUGH
THE SHEET.
IT IS A DUCK!
WE ARE SIMPLE PEASANTS.
IT IS OUR CUSTOM TO PUT
IN THE BED OF AN AILING WOMAN,
A DUCK.
THERE IS AN OLD
COUNTRY VERSE:
"IT IS VERY GOOD LUCK,
WHEN SOMEONE IS DEAD,
TO HAVE A WHITE DUCK,
AT THE END OF THE BED."
IT IS NOT WHITE.
THERE IS A WAR ON.
WE ARE LOOKING FOR RENE.
CLEARLY HE IS NOT HERE.
WE WILL SEARCH ELSEWHERE.
WHAT ABOUT
THE CUPBOARD?
I WILL LOOK THERE.
YOU LOOK
DOWN THE CORRIDOR.
SHOO! SHOO!
AS I THOUGHT, IT IS EMPTY.
RENE,
IT IS BELIEVED YOU
WERE BEHIND THE PLOT
TO MURDER THE GENERALS.
YOU ARE TO BE SHOT.
I DID NOT DO IT,
I PROMISE.
YOU MUST DISAPPEAR
UNTIL WE REVEAL
THE TRUE CULPRIT.
MEANWHILE,
STAY IN THE CLOSET.
I REGRET
THIS INTRUSION, MADAME,
AT THE TIME OF YOUR GRIEF.
( radio static;
flatulent sound )
HEIL HITLER.
- HEIL HITLER.
- ( spits )
( yelling )
HERR FLICK, OF THE GESTAPO!
Colonel:
AH, HERR FLICK--
CAPTAIN ALBERTO BERTORELLI,
HERR FLICK.
HERR FLICK,
THE SECRET POLICE--
I HEAR ALL ABOUT YOU.
HOW ARE YOU
GETTING ON, EH?
WHAT FOR YOU TELL ME
HE A NASTY MAN?
HE HAS A KIND FACE,
LIKE A LITTLE ANGEL.
TAKE THE SEAT.
MAKE YOURSELF AT HOME.
WHAT CAN WE DO FOR YOU?
WHAT I HAVE TO SAY IS FOR
THE EARS OF THE COLONEL,
AND NOT FOR A WOP
IN A FEATHER HAT.
I TAKE THE HINT.
I GO.
THE BEAUTIFUL LADY,
I KISS YOUR HAND.
( barks )
WHAT HITLER
WAS THINKING ABOUT
WHEN HE BROUGHT THAT LOT
INTO OUR WAR,
I CANNOT IMAGINE.
HAD I BEEN
IN CHARGE OF SECURITY,
THERE WOULD NOT
HAVE BEEN AN ATTEMPT
ON THE LIFE
OF THE GENERALS.
YOU ARE A BUNGLER.
WE ALREADY HAVE A SUSPECT--
RENE AT THE CAFE.
WE'RE GOING TO SHOOT HIM.
HOW CAN I INTERROGATE HIM,
IF YOU SHOOT HIM?
WHAT IS MORE,
I DO NOT BELIEVE HIM
TO BE THE GUILTY ONE.
HE IS TOO OBVIOUS
TO BE USED BY THE RESISTANCE.
THERE IS CLEARLY
SOMEONE ELSE.
THERE WAS, AT OUR MEETING,
A FRENCH GENERAL.
HE'S FROM VICHY,
AND THEY'RE SUPPOSED TO BE
ON OUR SIDE.
ONCE AGAIN HELGA HAS
PUT HER FINGER ON IT.
WE MUST FIND
THIS FRENCH GENERAL,
ARREST HIM,
AND INTERROGATE HIM.
DO YOU HAVE A DESCRIPTION?
HE HAS A BIG NOSE.
ALL FRENCH GENERALS
HAVE BIG NOSES.
HE IS TALL,
AND HE IS DRESSED
AS A FRENCH GENERAL.
WITH THIS DESCRIPTION,
WE SHOULD BE ABLE
TO FIND HIM.
WHEN WE DO,
I WILL ARREST HIM.
YVETTE, COGNACS FOR
THE COLONEL'S TABLE.
EDITH, I AM SICK
WITH WORRY.
WHERE IS RENE?
SHH! HE IS DOWN
THE CELLAR
WITH MONSIEUR LECLERC.
BUT THE FRENCH GENERAL
IS ALSO DOWN THERE.
HE IS STILL UNCONSCIOUS
FROM THE PILL OF MIMI.
WHEN I PARALYZE A MAN,
HE STAYS PARALYZED.
HOW ARE WE GOING TO
GET RENE AWAY FROM THE CAFE
WITH THE COLONEL
AND GRUBER THERE?
GRUBER WILL NOT
GIVE HIM AWAY.
I WILL TRY TO GET
THE COLONEL UPSTAIRS.
YOUR DRINKS, COLONEL.
AND WHEN YOU ARE READY
TO GO UPSTAIRS,
I HAVE A SPECIAL
END-OF-SEASON OFFER--
WET RHUBARB.
I'M SORRY, YVETTE.
ATTRACTIVE
AS IT SOUNDS,
I HAVE TO STAY HERE
UNTIL I'VE SEEN RENE.
AS SOON AS
WE'VE ARRESTED RENE,
WE WILL SAY HE'S ESCAPED.
GRUBER, YOU MUST HIDE HIM
IN YOUR ROOM AT THE CHATEAU.
OF COURSE.
I WILL NOT LET HIM
OUT OF MY SIGHT.
HE MUST RECOVER FOR US
THE PAINTINGS,
AND THEN IF THE GENERAL
INSISTS ON SHOOTING HIM,
IT DOESN'T MATTER.
DEAR MADAME EDITH,
I HAVE HERE FOR RENE,
THE CLOTHES
OF AN UNDERTAKER.
TELL HIM TO GET
TO MY MORTUARY
AND I'LL HIDE HIM
IN A COFFIN
UNTIL THE HEAT IS OFF.
YOU ARE A GOOD FRIEND,
MONSIEUR ALPHONSE.
I DO IT BECAUSE
I LOVE YOU.
JUST SAY THE WORD,
MADAME,
AND I'LL
SCREW DOWN THE LID.
GOOD MOANING.
I WILL TAKE IT
TO HIM AT ONCE.
I HEAR THE GERMANS
ARE LICKING FOR RONNIE.
HE IS HIDING
IN THE CELLAR.
I HAVE BROUGHT FOR HIM
A DISGEESE.
IT IS A POLOCEMAN'S
OUTFART.
WORING IT, HE CAN WICK
OUT OF THE COFFEE
AND DOWN THE STROOT.
THANK YOU,
OFFICER CRABTREE.
WISH HIM GOOD LICK FROM MOO.
MIMI, LOOK AFTER THE BAR.
I AM TAKING TO RENE
THE UNIFORM OF THE POLICEMAN.
HAVE YOU NOT FINISHED YET,
MONSIEUR LECLERC?
MADAME, IT IS
VERY SKILLFUL WORK.
WHERE IS RENE?
I HAVE FOR HIM
THE UNIFORM OF
A POLICEMAN.
HE IS ALREADY
WEARING HIS DISGUISE.
HOW DO I LOOK?
THE FRENCH GENERAL.
YOU LOOK MAGNIFICENT,
AND WHAT A NOSE!
MY VERY BEST WORK, MADAME.
WITH THIS,
HE CAN NOW ESCAPE.
YES, THERE IS ONE PROBLEM.
MY LEGS HAVE TURNED TO JELLY.
TAKE COURAGE,
MY HUSBAND.
YVETTE WILL SEE YOU
THROUGH THE BAR,
INTO THE BACK ROOM.
GO THROUGH THE WINDOW,
AND HEAD FOR SPAIN.
WHEN I GET THERE,
I WILL WRITE.
GOOD LUCK.
THAT WAS A WONDERFUL NOSE,
MONSIEUR LECLERC.
DID YOU USE CLAY?
NO, MADAME,
CLAY IS TOO CRUMBLY.
I USED ONE OF THESE.
- THERE.
- WHAT IS IT?
IT IS PLASTIC EXPLOSIVE.
LET US HOPE
HE DOES NOT SMOKE.
DO NOT WORRY, MADAME.
IT WILL NOT GO OFF
UNLESS YOU LIGHT
THE WICK.
HAVE YOU PUT A WICK
UP HIS NOSE?
I HAVE BURIED IT
IN HIS NOSTRIL.
COME THIS WAY, GENERAL.
I HAVE A PLACE FOR YOU
IN THE PRIVATE ROOM.
COLONEL, THAT IS
THE FRENCH GENERAL,
THE ONE
HERR FLICK SUSPECTS.
IF HERR FLICK IS RIGHT,
IT WOULD TAKE
THE SUSPICION OFF RENE.
HELGA, GO QUICKLY
AND TELL HERR FLICK,
AND WE WILL SEE
HE DOESN'T LEAVE THE CAFE.
YOU CANNOT
GO THAT WAY,
IT IS SWARMING
WITH GERMAN TROOPS.
WHAT DOES THAT MATTER?
A FRENCH GENERAL
CANNOT BE SEEN
CLIMBING OUT
OF A WINDOW.
YOU MUST LEAVE
BY THE FRONT DOOR.
OH MY GOD,
YOU ARE RIGHT, OF COURSE.
WISH ME LUCK.
OH, RENE,
KISS ME GOODBYE
FOR ONE LAST TIME.
OH, YVETTE.
OH.
OH, RENE.
OH, RENE!
NOW GO!
DO NOT LOOK BACK.
I CANNOT BEAR
TO SEE YOU.
HERE HE COMES.
WE MUST NOT
LET HIM LEAVE.
GENERAL!
GENERAL AZNAVOUR.
WHAT A PLEASURE
TO SEE YOU.
YOU MUST COME AND JOIN US
AT THE TABLE.
TAKE WINE.
IT IS SUCH A PLEASURE
TO HAVE YOU ON OUR SIDE.
( low voice )
NO, I AM SORRY,
I CANNOT, COLONEL.
I HAVE
AN URGENT APPOINTMENT
TO DO SOME
COLLABORATING.
NONSENSE!
GRUBER, A CHAIR
FOR THE GENERAL.
CHAMPAGNE
FOR THE GENERAL!
GENERAL AZNAVOUR,
A WORD
IN YOUR EAR.
YOUR NOSE
IS SQUASHED.
OH MY GOD!
Gruber:
IT IS RENE!
WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
I AM TRYING TO ESCAPE.
PLEASE, DO NOT GIVE ME AWAY.
OF COURSE I WILL NOT,
BUT YOU MUST
GET OUT OF HERE QUICKLY.
THE PLAN
YOU OUTLINED--
THAT PLAN YOU OUTLINED
AT THE CONFERENCE
WAS VERY INTERESTING.
COLONEL,
IT IS RENE
UNDER AN ASSUMED NOSE.
MY GOD, WHAT A HOOTER!
EXCUSE ME, IT IS TICKLING.
ACHOO!
RENE
LISTEN CLOSELY.
WE MUST HIDE YOU.
- ( fizzling )
- YOU MUST REMAIN
IN HIS QUARTERS
UNTIL THE REAL FRENCH GENERAL
HAS BEEN FOUND.
FLICK WILL GET
A CONFESSION OUT OF HIM,
WHETHER HE IS
GUILTY OR NOT.
MEANWHILE,
YOU MUST HELP US
TO RECOVER THE PAINTINGS.
RENE,
YOUR NOSE IS SMOLDERING.
QUICK, IT IS
PLASTIC EXPLOSIVE!
OH MY GOD!
AAAHH!
( explosion )
( theme music playing )