Ally Mcbeal s03e21 Episode Script

Ally McBeal: The Musical, Almost

Ally McBeal Season 3 Episode 21 The Musical µ¿¿µ»ó Á¤º¸ : 306MB/DVDRip Mom? Dad? Um uh, I would, I would, I would, I would I would like you to meet, um, Brian.
And, and Brian, th-this is my parents.
Brr-grrrrr! Grrrrr! Well, we, we should probably get going.
Our reservations are for eignt and and we don't want to be late! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! We won't.
It's not like they're going to run out of food.
I-it's a restaurant, they have, they have plenty! Ha ha It's just, never mind.
Um, wh-wh-whe-where is my coat? Got it.
Just here.
Ah, ah-ah-ah! It's here! How about that? Well, we should go because I, I am, I am dying -- starving.
So, we're off to dinner, all four of us.
One two three four! We can walk because it's very close.
Ally, that's the bedroom! He's, he's right.
Heh heh.
He's right.
Right You seem to go through something like this every time you have a birthday.
How could I not go through it? birthdays, people take inventories of their lives, do they not? The wife, the kids, the home.
What do I have to show for my thirty-six years? I have no family.
You have friends.
Aren't they throwing you a big party? Hmm.
Elaine Vassal organizes it, only so she can do a number.
She'd tap dance on my head, if there was applause in it.
John Except for Richard Fish, all my friends work for me.
I walk around muttering, "Balls, balls, balls" all day long.
I've become a little curmudgeon toad.
The worst part is, it suits me.
I am a little curmudgeon toad! That's probably what I was put on earth to be.
Ha, balls! The problem is, I didn't want to leave Cage and Fish.
I was happy there.
You didn't want to leave? No.
Well, i-if you didn't want to leave, don't you think stealing files and starting your own practice was probably a misguided thing to do? Well, I thought I wanted out.
But it was more about punishing the dweeb.
The dweeb? John Cage.
Nelle, look at me.
If you really want to go back, I'm sure I can work it out with Richard Fish.
Did you sleep with him again? Oh, god, Nelle.
Humph! I just let him go down on my button.
Tell me what you want to do.
I, I don't know.
And I don't know what I've done to deserve this this isolation! Nelle, honey, you screwed your friends.
Even so, my life hasn't been so charmed, you know.
I've had it pretty rough When I was a kid, my dad ¢Ü She's gonna tell you about her dear old mother ¢Ü Burned up in a factory in Springfield, Mass.
¢Ü He's gonna tell you about his baby brother Hustling down the streets, selling his ass ¢Ü He's got the blues, this boy He's got the blues, you can hear it in his music ¢Ü She's got the blues, this girl She's got the blues, you can hear it, you can hear it ¢Ü When I was nine years old My daddy ran away ¢Ü With a woman he met on a train ¢Ü She's got the blues, this girl She's got the blues, you can hear it in her music ¢Ü He's got the blues, this boy He's got the blues, you can hear it, you can hear it ¢Ü A year ago, I met a girl I thought we hit a massive groove ¢Ü But she dumped me And all we hit was the blues Y-you knew that Brian was a lawyer, um too? Di-did I mention that? Not in the last five minutes.
Oh my dad, oh, he's so funny, he-heh! Isn't he funny? He's a stitch.
Ha-ha-ha! Well, well, that's funny too.
I, I guess I just have two funny parents! Heh-heh Who knew? Relax, honey.
Well, I just think that everybody is so damn ---- Funny.
What kind of law do you practice? Hah-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha He he he, ha ha ha ha ha I think it could be the drugs, interacting with the wine.
It's my fault.
I, I slipped her a little something just to loosen her up for later.
Khah ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha Ahoo, ahoo, ahoo, ahoo, achooo!! Mostly litigation, although I'm, uh I'm trying to get out of it.
There's just too much acrimony on a daily basis.
I'm probably going to go into corporate.
Corporate's boring.
Nothing but paperwork -- dotting i's and crossing t's.
Well, it sounds exciting to hear you describe it.
I thought the English liked acrimony.
You see them all screaming at each other in Parliament.
I watch it on cable.
It's ridiculous.
Well, it's, it's not really like that.
We just do that to entertain the Americans when they can't watch wrestling.
Ha ha.
Would you like to hear the specials? Actually, I'm still waiting for my drink.
Were you just kidding when you took our drink orders? I'll check on them, sir.
¢Ü At first I was afraid, I was petrified Ally, what are you doing? Oh, I I just thought there was a disco queen under the table.
He-he-heh Even I'm funny! Ha ha.
I guess it comes from having two funny parents! ¢Ü Relax, enjoy yourself, It's only a glorious game Scotch and water.
And you had the gimlet? ¢Ü There's fruit trees growing in an open field ¢Ü And wild roses blooming down a country lane ¢Ü Look around, old chum; Slow it down, old chum ¢Ü For you never will succeed, you never will succeed Ally? Ally? What's wrong? I mean, aside from your father the stitch.
Oh, um you know, I, I think I'm just a little, uh, nervous.
Oh, for god's sake, stop acting like a teenager.
¢Ü It must be very trying to be bad all the time ¢Ü Vicious and cruel and mean! ¢Ü Perhaps when you were little, they held you in their arms ¢Ü And told you that they loved you very much Hey ¢Ü Relax, enjoy yourself It's all just a wonderful game ¢Ü There are rivers and forests and mountains high ¢Ü There's the deep green ocean and the pale blue sky ¢Ü Let it go, and then you will know, old friend ¢Ü That you never will succeed You never will succeed Well, it seems she's not hungry.
(ÁÖ)¡¡stitch: a very funny person (Always with a) It was my fault? Uh corporate's boring.
Uh, gee, I thought the English liked acrimony.
I was just making conversation.
You were just guaranteeing that we have a lousy evening.
You, you wanted the whole thing to tank.
Well, congratulations, you pulled it off! But, see, the problem is, Dad, is that I'm thirty now, not sixteen.
So, I don't need my father's approval in order to like a guy.
So, whatever it was that you were trying to accomplish, it didn't work! You don't get to talk to me like that.
Why weren't you at the funeral? What? Billy's.
I was in London.
You knew that.
I called.
Oh, right.
You called.
Well, you know, it was really nice having dinner with you, Dad, but I am going to go have lunch with the man in my life.
(ÁÖ) tank: for something to fail to lose a game deliberately (õóîð£ºNTC's Dictionary of American Slang£© How can you meet with her? Well, I won't if you're against it ---- Well, I am against it! I can't believe that you're not! I mean, no matter how many clients are involved! John, if Nelle's leaving, if it was about you, I know you still have some pent-up anger with regard to her ---- Oh, balls! Maybe you two should talk.
Look, look.
I wouldn't think of hiring her back if you didn't want it.
Ev-even if you did want it, I doubt that I But I still think that you two should get ---- I HATE HER! You know, as long as I've known you, I don't think I've ever heard you use that word, "hate.
" I never thought you even had the capacity for, for hate.
Well then, you were wrong, weren't you? And prior to her leaving, you were walking around, you were saying some pretty awful things to her, about her.
She dumped me while I was wedged in an elevator.
In public, in front of the whole office! Well, what difference does it make? It makes a big difference! You know, I've never told anybody this.
When I was five or six, I was fat, rotund.
And the other kids would just tease me so We had this neighborhood carnival to raise money for the Jimmy Fund.
And they some of them convinced me to be in a booth, where they would guess my weight, try to win a a Teddy Bear.
They'd sing the song, and I can still hear it, Richard.
¢Ü Johnny the fat boy, Johnny the fat boy ¢Ü Isn't he round, isn't he round? What does he weigh, folks? ¢Ü Can you guess what he weighs? You know, it's only a quarter! Well, I made up my mind right then in that booth, I would not be fat and there would be limits as to how much ridicule I would endure.
And she crossed the line, Richard.
She did, she crossed the line.
And what about you? Your problem, John: You care too much about what other people think -- how things look to everybody.
Well, what hurt me I cared about what you were thinking, and you so fundamentally dissaprove of who I am of what I am.
That's a lot more painful than being stuck in an elevator, I promise you.
I want you to leave, Nelle.
Can you get that? I don't want you in my office! No.
You don't want me in your life.
I get that.
I got it even before you did.
I am not going to make love to you! You're rejecting me? Under these circumstances, I most certainly am.
I'm not about to go bed with you simply because you're angry at your father! Brian, that is not it! I am in the mood! D-d-do I not look like I am in the mood, damn it? You're in a mood.
I, I, I thought that you wanted this.
Ally, you have a fight with your dad.
You call me, you tell me to rush right over.
I, I mean We will make love, hopefully very soon.
But not because of some ---- Brian, you are a man.
You are supposed to take it any way you can get it.
Well, I don't want it this way.
I'll dance with you.
I bet he'd hate that.
Are you making fun of me now? I'm not making fun of you.
I'm just saying, "Suck it up"! Oh, suck up what? I never understood this expression.
Maybe if you heard the bells ---- Balls bells! I can't even hear Barry White anymore.
Didn't I tell you that? You know, John, I have my own little theme song.
I, I never talk about it, but I've got one.
Well, I will pay you not to sing it.
Well, you'll hear it at the party.
Actually, I've asked Elaine to sing it.
Oh god! ¢Ü It couldn't be more appropriate for what you're going through.
¢Ü When you're on the bottom, like you are today Could you at least hit a note? ¢Ü Those around you're losing faith in what you're trying to do Richard, you're tone-deaf! ¢Ü There's only one thing a man can say ¢Ü You can't give a good man down! ¢Ü Mmm, there have been mistakes, I've made a few This is hardly cheering me up! ¢Ü Oh, what a price I've had to pay! He-he-he-heh! You're a gook! ¢Ü Yet still they try to push me around ¢Ü But they can't keep a good man down There may be times when I'm feeling low ¢Ü I lose sight of the dream But that's all right 'Cause soon I know ¢Ü I'll be back on top again, running things! ¢Ü Treat a man like dirt Give him no respect for who he is ¢Ü Expect something dirty in return ¢Ü Oh, they're flying high up there, they've got a lot to learn ¢Ü Because you can't keep a good man down ¢Ü Woh, they try to shame me baby, try to frame me ¢Ü But they can't keep a good man No, they can't keep a good man down Hmm Now I'm ready to make love to you.
Hmm And now, I don't want to! A woman who will kiss on the very first date is usually a hussy.
And a woman who kisses on the second time out -- anything but fussy.
You know that song? The Music Man, yeah.
It's one of my favorites.
Really? Yeah.
Well, it, it is my Figures! What? My dad and I would always sing Lida Rose together, from The Music Man.
I love Love Rose.
¢ÜDream of now, dream of What? No no no.
Th-th-that, that's the girl's part.
Oh, and what? Men can't dream? Well, men sing the bottom.
Lida Rose, I'm home again, Rose.
Lida Rose.
See, see? That way, the man is singing to the woman, and that is the old-fashioned way.
You're on.
Here we go.
Come! Okay, uh Mm-hm-hm, Lida Rose, I'm home ---- W-w-w-w-w-wait, wait.
I was, I wasn't ready.
¢Ü [Ally.]
Dream of now Dream of then ¢Ü [Brian.]
Lida Rose, I'm home again, Rose To get the sun back in the sky ¢Ü [Ally.]
Dream of a love song That might have been ¢Ü [Brian.]
Lida Rose, I'm home again, Rose About a thousand kisses shy ¢Ü [Ally.]
Do I love you? Oh, yes, I love you ¢Ü [Brian.]
Ding, dong, ding I can hear the chapel bell chime ¢Ü [Ally.]
And I'll bravely tell you But only when we dream again ¢Ü [Brian.]
Ding, dong, ding At the least suggestion I'll pop the question ¢Ü [Ally.]
Sweet ¢Ü [Brian.]
Lida Rose, I'm home again, Rose ¢Ü [Young Ally.]
and low, sweet and low ¢Ü [Dad.]
Without a sweetheart to my name ¢Ü [Young Ally.]
How sweet the memory ¢Ü [Dad.]
Without a sweetheart to my name Lida Rose, how everyone knows ¢Ü [Young Ally.]
How long ago ¢Ü [Dad.]
That I am hoping you're the same ¢Ü [Young Ally.]
Forever, oh yes ¢Ü [Dad.]
So, here's love my song ¢Ü [Ally.]
forever ¢Ü [Brian.]
Not fancy or fine ¢Ü [Ally.]
Will I ever tell you? ¢Ü [Brian.]
Lida Rose, or won't you be? ¢Ü [Ally.]
I know ¢Ü [Brian.]
Lida Rose, oh Lida Rose, oh Lida Rose! Nelle, whatever you believe my opinion of you is, I can't see it wounding you to such depths that My dissaproval of you, it only went to your ---- Being a rich, bitch, ice-queen, elitist, cold snob.
In case you're in search [of.]
the words.
But you embraced that, Nelle.
I called you elitist, and you wore it like a badge.
But in your eyes, it was an indictment.
Well, it wasn't in yours.
So, what do you care? Because I loved you.
How ---- Okay.
So, you were wounded by somebody you loved.
Well, so was I.
The difference is, you did it maliciously.
So did you! Walking around the office saying the things you were saying.
That came from the hurt after we broke up.
You dumping me while I was in that elevator -- that didn't come from pain.
Yes, it did! John, you couldn't love me because you couldn't like me.
You know I loved you.
Not like you loved her.
We both know how you love her and how you never loved me.
So don't dare come in here, trying to compare pain.
¢Ü I just want you to hurt, like I do Honest I do, honest I do, honest I do I don't know what you've done to your father What I've done to him? Mom, you saw him last night.
He was an ass -- what's new? He was also nervous.
Nervous? Well ? Last night was the first time you've ever invited us to come meet somebody man in your life.
man in your life.
And isn't that a good thing? Of course, it is.
Well then, why did he try to ruin it? Oh, you know, as much as your father wants you, wants you to be happy, he And he does, he does want you to be happy.
The idea of losing you, the idea of somebody else being your center You know, I think seeing you with Brian I think that was probably very hard for him and ---- Well, that not only makes him selfish, it also makes him a dope! I, I've grown up, Mother.
What, what does he think? That I'm going to be daddy's little girl forever and ever? Oh, he doesn't think that.
Well then, what are you trying to say, Mom? I'm trying to say it was hard for him.
You know, I didn't come here to listen to that tone! What's in this for you? I beg your pardon? Well, you tell me that his love for me preempted his feelings for you, and and now, you're sitting there wanting me to work it out with him.
I'd like to know what's in it for you.
Oh, you ! Y, I, I I won't have you talk to me like that.
Hey, you know, you've come into my office.
You don't get to sit there and tell me what tone I can use, or what I can or cannot say! Now, I would like to know why the hell want me to get along with Dad! Because he's my only connection and ---- Connection to what? To you to you.
What what are you talking about? You know, whatever, um progress we've made, he is the one you call to check in with and ---- That isn't true.
I'm your daughter.
You, you don't need him for me to be your daughter.
I'm your daughter.
A-as much as I'm, I'm I'm your daughter! Yeah yeah Well, um okay, then I think I'm just I'm going to go home.
Would you tell, um would you tell Brian how much I enjoyed meeting him? Sure.
Uh, Mom? Bye.
Bye, honey.
Is Georgia actually going to sing? Only the refrain.
Plus, her mike is turned down, she doesn't know it.
¢Ü I was dealt a losing hand ¢Ü The way that I look and the way that I act It's not hard to understand Anybody seen Ally? Uh, she'll be down.
We've got some big surprises planned tonight, John.
Hello! This isn't one of them.
Were you invited? Well, Nelle wanted to come and ---- Ruin the party? Richard, John, I'm sorry.
I realize I was acting out of personal pain.
And I also realize I wasn't fair in the way I I owe apologies to both of you.
I understand.
You do?? Richard, pipe down! I'm sorry for the way I hurt you.
May I? Look.
The thing is, I've always been Sub-Zero Nelle.
met you, I let my guard down and and hurt.
Thanks, Nelle.
You're really picking up the party! Richard.
I happened to love working at Cage and Fish, more than I could ever.
I'm not going to cry, Ling.
What I want to say is The practice of law is only as good as people you work with.
I want to work with you.
¢Ü Take me back Baby, please take me back Just give me a chance, and we'll start all over again! Uh, it's, it's your call, John.
¢Ü Every night I eat alone Baby, please, please, please Won't you let me come back home! I'm okay with it, if you are, Richard.
I don't, I don't know Richard, say yes for me.
It's time you do something for me.
What do you want? Sex? No, not sex.
It's John's birthday.
I want a little performance.
A perfomance? I like performing! Yeah.
I know you do.
Wow! You and Mom, so many visits! I, uh wrote you a song.
I didn't need you to write me a song, Dad.
I needed you to be kind to Brian.
I wasn't mean to him.
Well, you certainly weren't excited to meet him, or you didn't act excited for me.
Were you? Of course, I was.
Why aren't you happy for me, Dad? I, I, I don't, I don't get it.
I am, sweetheart.
Mom says ---- Oh, your, your mother ---- No.
Mom, Mom told me once what a wonderful father you were, and where you were most heroic was how you raised me to believe that my dreams could come true, when yours never did.
You do want my dreams to come true? You, you do want that, right? Yes.
Well, um John Cage is having a birthday party downstairs, and it's really important for me to be there.
Uh you go ahead.
I think I love him, Daddy.
That I'm unable to share that with you.
You don't know him, Brian.
He cheated on my mother, he This is just the latest in a string of disapointments, trust me.
Well, it is my life, and his opinion of it is not going to affect me! Yeah, I can see that.
Well, I'm glad to see that you're enjoying all this.
Ally, my father betrayed me like you wouldn't believe.
Really? What did he do? He turned out not to be perfect.
Uh, it's it's just I thought that, that he and I, that, that we had I don't know.
Something special? And we don't.
We're just another father and daughter who don't communicate anymore.
Maybe, maybe that's how it should be.
Okay, listen up.
Uh uh, first, a toast to, to John.
John! Happy birthday! Happy birthday! Yeah.
Second, let us re-welcome Nelle.
Uh, I'd like a signed commitment that all future backstabbing, lying, stealing, whatever, you'll, you'll do it for us.
That's funny! Well, hear, hear.
Uh well uh, god.
Um I just, I just want to say that I'm just really, totally Drunk.
Mmm Gone! Uh, John, we've got a little performance for you.
Now, what's going on? ¢Ü Some girls, they like candy; and others, they like to grind ¢Ü I'll settle for the back of your hand somewhere on my behind ¢Ü Treat me like I'm a bad girl, even when I'm being good to you! ¢Ü I don't want you to thank me ¢Ü You can just spank me! Unacceptable.
She sings? How fun! Do you find her attractive? Her? No! No! ¢Ü Don't smother me with kisses, I can get that from my sister ¢Ü Treat me like I'm a bad girl, even when I'm being good to you ¢Ü I don't want you to thank me, you just spank me! Very unacceptable.
¢Ü Come on, babe! Spank me! I'm sorry I can't stay for the rest of the party.
Oh, that's okay.
I'll see you when you get back.
Why didn't you call him? Who? I am not going to call him.
Well, he he can ruin a phone call just as easy as he can destroy a dinner.
I, I don't need to get along with my father.
Yeah, but you want to.
No, I don't.
And how all of a sudden do you presume to know me so damn well? Because you're acting like a monster.
And women don't do that until you really get to know them.
Are you trying to pick a fight, Brian? I'm English.
We love acrimony, remember? Don't you get cable? Has anyone ever told you how incredibly beautiful you are when you get cross? You're handling me? Is it working? ¢Ü Let's just say you find someone You like him, and he likes you What are you thinking? Nothing.
¢Ü Let's just say you get along, life goes on that way Wow What? I have a boyfriend! You do.
It's just that it's been a long time since I've felt this.
¢Ü Let's just say you fall in love, and he falls in love with you ¢Ü Let's just say it stays that way Forever ¢Ü There's a party at my house tonight! Everybody's wound up nice and tight ¢Ü They'll be rockin', rollin' till the morning light There's a party at my house tonight I'm getting threatened by Hope.
I need your attention! What? You? Threatened? What? I know I'm better than everybody else, Richard.
But sometimes, it's nice to hear it.
I want to be a couple again.
What, you and me? Other men I meet seem to have such depth.
I miss that shallow thing we had! Really? You, you're not just saying that so I'll do your knee? I miss you.
I miss you, too.
¢Ü We're gonna have some fun We're gonna rock the night away ¢Ü Still be rockin' when the morning come Stand back, baby ¢Ü Don't get excited Didn't I tell you, Mama You were in the ladies' room a long time? Well, I was, uh just freshening up.
Nelle, whatever our relationship is, I feel we should be honest with one another.
Can I be totally honest with you? Yes, John, yeah.
I, uh I really want you to be.
I expect that.
You have a little vomit on your nose.
Thank you.
¢Ü Stand back, baby Don't get excited Didn't I tell you, Mama Everyone's invited? ¢Ü There's a party at my house There's a party at my house tonight Daddy.
Glad you didn't change the locks, anyway.
What is this -- you and Mom, you, you just keep appearing? I just, uh I am happy for you, sweetheart.
I, uh There was no excuse for me not being at Billy's funeral.
truth is, I would have flown to London just to avoid it.
The thought of seeing you hurt Maybe, uh if I felt I had some power to make that hurt go away.
Could I hear the song? What? You said that you wrote a song for me.
Oh, that um Maybe one day I'll I, I'd like to hear it now.
Well, um I, uh don't think I remember all of it, but, uh It's kind of embarrassing now, you know, after ---- Daddy, just play it.
¢Ü She's a real emotional girl ¢Ü Wears her heart on her sleeve ¢Ü Every little thing you tell her ¢Ü She'll believe ¢Ü She really will ¢Ü She even cries in her sleep ¢Ü I've heard her many times before ¢Ü I'll never have a girl who loves me half as much as this girl loves me ¢Ü She's real emotional ¢Ü Eighteen years she lived at home, she was Daddy's little girl ¢Ü Daddy helped her move out on her own ¢Ü She met a boy, who broke her heart ¢Ü She's very, very careful, yes she is ¢Ü She's a real emotional girl ¢Ü Lives down deep inside herself ¢Ü She turns on easy, it's like a hurricane ¢Ü You would not believe, you gotta hold on tight to her ¢Ü She's a real emotional girl ¼­ÀºÀÌ ¾ö¸ , Àç¹ÌÀÖ°Ô º¸¼Ì³ª¿ä? Áö±Ý±îÁö ÀÚ¸· Á¦ÀÛ¿¡ ³×ÀÌÆ® µå ó¸ 24 µ¿È£È¸ ÀÌ¿Ü¿¡ ¹«´Ü ¼öÁ¤, ¹èÆ÷ ±ÝÁöÀÔ´Ï´Ù ¸¸µç ³¯Â¥ : 2003/11/23
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