Ally Mcbeal s05e11 Episode Script

A Kick in the Head

Oh, damn it! Damn it! Damn it! Damn it! Hello.
It's a little late.
- But I'll take six boxes.
- I'm not selling cookies.
- Are you Allyson McBeal? - I am.
- Do you like surprises? - I hate them.
- Am I about to get one? - Sort of.
Want it straight up, or would you like to sit? Hit me.
I'm your daughter.
Did you hear me? I'm just waiting for the little fantasy beat to be over.
- You're still standing there.
- Because I'm still here.
And I'm still your daughter.
- Obviously, that's impossible.
- Obviously, it's not.
Ten and a half years ago, you harvested eggs and stored them.
By a mistake at the facility, they gave one of your eggs to my father, who died six months ago.
I was placed with a wicked aunt.
I've spent two months tracking you down.
Hi, Mom.
I've been down this road A Kick In the Head Walking the line That's painted by pride And I have made mistakes in my life That Ijust can't hide Oh, I believe I am ready For what love has to bring I got myself together Now I'm ready to sing I've been searching my soul tonight I know there's so much more to life Now I know I can shine the light To fiind my way back home Baby - Obviously, we're mortified.
- Just tell me, is it true? - Is she my genetic daughter? - Apparently, she is.
- We're mortified.
- How can this happen? There is an explanation.
I'm not sure it would appease you.
What am I gonna do? As you know, you gave your egg anonymously- As part of a study.
I was to be notified if it were ever actually used.
I was never notified.
Which was our mistake.
We're mortified.
- Our records show you were contacted.
- I wasn't.
I wasn't.
I'm a mother.
There's a 10-year-old girl out there with my eyes.
You're mortified? I'm a mother.
Sometimes these things can be a blessing.
A blessing? Did you say "a blessing"? You plop a 10-year-old girl down in somebody's lap and you-? Hi, Maddie.
How long have you been standing there? Long enough.
Obviously, this is a very big day in my life.
My very first murder trial.
Are we all set, buddy? You look nervous.
No reason for you to be nervous.
I'm first chair.
- You're doing a murder trial? - Yes.
That a problem? The defendant's okay with it? - I'm ready, Nelle.
Just ask John.
Are you okay, buddy? Next up.
Anybody seen Jenny and Ally? Ally has plumbing problems.
With her house.
Jenny has plumbing problems.
Not her house.
Richard, I'm sorry.
Can I see you in private? What's wrong? I am trying to be supportive of the new serious you but I am very concerned about you doing this trial.
Why? If we lose, our client will go to prison for the rest of his life.
- The client's thrilled with me.
- You guaranteed an acquittal.
That tends to please them.
We cannot guarantee an acquittal.
In fact, this case is enormously difficult.
He claims he kicked his wife because he thought her head was a ball? The reality is, he will likely go to prison forever.
I can do it.
John, there's an old homily- Cliché, yes, but I believe in it: Winning isn't everything.
People on trial for first-degree murder tend to disfavor that homily.
I'm gonna win this, John.
You watch.
- Her daughter? - That's what she said.
- In there? - Yes.
- Ten years old? - Is Billy the father? She didn't say.
I'm an extremely emotional person.
Don't take anything I say personally.
What do I look like, a dope? You're upset.
Sorry to burden you.
- Don't try to guilt me, because- - I'm not.
I'm just saying I understand your feelings.
Maddie, right now, I don't even understand my feelings.
Really nice.
I left you a note.
You run off, you don't tell me where you're going.
Really nice.
I'm Bonnie Boone.
Maddie's aunt.
I am sorry about this.
This is a cry for attention.
Really nice.
- Don't psychoanalyze me- - I'm talking.
So am I.
I really apologize.
She asked me to help track you down because she wanted to see you one day.
She never said she'd run off, leaving me to worry myself sick with grief.
Could you be any more dramatic? - We have a 1:00 flight.
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
A 10-year-old genetic daughter doesn't just show up at my door and then catch a 1:00 flight.
Well, I'll be gone.
Isn't that what you want? Maddie, I'm I'm sure you're a nice girl, but you chose to insert yourself in my life so, like it or not, in some capacity, you are in it.
And so are you.
And nobody is gonna be getting on any 1:00 flight.
I was at the beach, and I noticed the waves were exceptionally big.
I first saw a rather attractive woman sunbathing and my eye caught hers.
Not in a sexual way, of course.
I'm a conservative woman.
Objection, Your Honor.
- What about after you saw the woman? - Well, then I saw that man.
And he was walking towards her in an idle way.
Then I saw his eyes fix upon her.
All of a sudden, he started to run straight at her.
And as he got within a yard he planted his left foot in the sand, and with his right he kicked her.
Right in the head.
- He just ran up and kicked her? - Right in the head.
Almost as if her head were, say, a soccer ball? - Exactly.
- Thank you, Ms.
Thank you.
Finley, what happened after Mr.
Willis realized he'd hurt his wife? - He became very upset.
- Upset.
Despondent, even? I think.
You think? You're an observant woman.
Did he become despondent or not? He did.
Thank you.
Why did you leap up in the middle of my cross? I didn't leap, I stood.
And your cross appeared to be over.
For us to have a chance, the jury has to respect me.
- They have to think of me as a sage.
- That's not likely to happen.
Oh, I'm sorry.
We have to deal with intent.
Our defense is that he didn't know he was kicking his wife.
When he realized it was his wife, his remorse is important.
And as long as I'm in progress with a sentence here let me conclude it by stressing over again Kendall, I think we should plead this out.
Richard is sure we can win.
How could the jury not think he was crazy? He thought his wife was a soccer ball.
I used to be a lawyer.
Two years, and I quit.
And now you sing? Yeah, TV jingles.
I was a blues singer for about six years and could not make my rent.
On New Year's Eve, I did these jingles as a lark.
Gilligan, Beverly Hillbillies, you name it.
The crowd went nuts.
- I'm suddenly getting bookings.
- And your brother? Dead.
Yes, I know.
I just He was a great man.
He A great man.
So are you her only family? Yeah.
Unless we include genetics.
That would make you family.
Let me know what you wanna do.
You wanna get to know us? You want us to go away? You have no obligation.
Maddie understands that.
Could you just stay the night and let me visit with her some? Sure.
You know, she said that, well, you know, she wanted to live with me.
- Excuse me? - Well, that's what she said.
Well, she's just You know, she's very manipulative.
She's just Kids.
- You will so not believe it.
- What? There's a bar downstairs.
- Stage, music.
I got you booked.
- What? - Tonight.
Elaine helped.
- I'm sorry.
I should've checked first.
But I thought I should nail the booking.
I can fill in if you cancel.
It seats over a hundred.
They have these Ikettes who could do your backup.
- Down, girl.
- This could be great! If you started getting bookings in Boston, I could see Ally all the time.
Did you tell Ally you wanted to live with her? Um I was testing her.
To see To see what? I wanted to spend the night to get to know her so I kind of made my life seem a little more desperate.
- Sorry.
- Shall I cancel the booking? - There's no problem for me to fill in.
- No, she'll do it.
But- Why not? Richard, I must be candid when I tell you, I suffer from stress.
- Maybe it's in light of world events.
- We need to focus on the case.
I am.
And if you introduce that particular exhibit it will push my stress to the breaking point.
If we argue that the shadows or the reflection off the water- You can't paint her face to make her look like a soccer ball.
It's tampering.
The judge just called us back into session.
Sometimes when I look at her, I still can't believe she's gone.
I didn't see you.
- We can't introduce that, Mr.
- Why? It's just a picture of her.
You don't notice anything particularly different about this picture? Janet was sunbathing.
I decided to take a walk on the beach.
As I came back, I saw what I thought was a soccer ball.
I used to play soccer, and, well, I just kicked it.
I think I speak for the jury when I ask, why would you kick somebody else's ball? I guess I didn't think about that.
There was nobody around- What were your thoughts, sir, when you first realized the soccer ball was in fact your wife? I was devastated.
I loved my wife deeply.
We had never been happier.
I wish I could explain what possessed me at that moment.
I can't.
- You're a college professor? - I am.
The day before you kicked your wife, did you teach? - Yes.
- Any insane incidents? - Nope.
- On that day, who drove to the beach? I did.
- Did you obey all the traffic laws? - Yes.
So right up until that moment that you kicked your wife you were behaving in a normal manner? Yes.
- You don't know what possessed you? - Right.
Your wife had an affair five months prior to her death, didn't she? - We had put that behind us.
- Yeah.
You put it behind you.
- Did you ever hit your wife? - No.
Do you recognize that woman? That's my neighbor Helen Patterson.
- What's your relationship with her? - We're friendly.
I'm about to call her as an impeachment witness, sir.
She heard an argument between you and your late wife the week before her death.
She heard your wife plead with you to stop hitting her.
I will not ask you again, sir.
Did you ever hit your wife before? Once I kind of slapped her.
But I never hurt her.
And it was a mistake.
A mistake.
I'm sorry.
I should've told you.
But I thought if it got out I had swatted her I know it sounds crazy, but I swear, I loved my wife.
- And I would never, ever do anything- - Damn it! - I'm sorry.
- Never mind sorry.
You lean on me, sit on me now you hang your coat on me.
It's like I'm not even there.
You're not there sometimes.
I don't see you.
What do you mean? When I slapped my wife, I thought she was a mosquito.
When I leaned on you, and just now, I thought you were a coat rack.
- I beg your pardon? - I wish I could explain it.
Sometimes you look like a coat rack to me.
Just like Janet looked like a soccer ball.
- How long has this been going on? - About a year.
Sometimes I look at people and I see inanimate objects.
Or Why didn't you tell somebody? It's hard enough to sell the idea that I saw my wife as a soccer ball.
That I also saw her as a bug, or people as coat racks Now, you've been treated thus far by psychiatrists? Yes.
I think it's time you saw a neurologist.
Love America's sign And on a star-spangled night My love You can rest your head On my shoulder I will defend your right to cry This is one great crowd! You guys ready for some music? Here's the story Of a lovely lady Who was bringing up Three very lovely girls All of them had hair ofgold Like their mother The youngest one in curls Isn't it great to be in a bar in Boston? Speaking of bars in Boston Making your way in the world today Takes everything you've got Taking a break from all your worries Sure would help a lot Wouldn't you like to get away? Everybody.
Sometimes you wanna go Where everybody knows your name - Are you for real? - She's good.
How about this one? Welcome back Your dreams were your ticket out Welcome back to that same old place That you laughed about Help me out, sir.
The names have all changed Since you hung around But those dreams have remained And they'll turn around I see we're in the right group.
Everybody happy? Everybody on this one.
- Sunday Monday happy days - Tuesday Wednesday happy days - Thursday Friday happy days - The weekend comes My cycle hums Ready to race to you These days are all I admit it, the woman knows how to work a room.
It's so difficult to get Elaine to sing.
Yours and mine - Why is the spotlight on me? - I'm sure there's a good reason.
How will you make it on your own? Oh, God.
This world is awfully big And girl, this time you're all alone Well it's time you started living It's time you let someone else Do some giving Love is all around No need to waste it You can have a time Why don't you take it? You mightjust make it after all You're gonna make it after all I'm sorry.
I should've interviewed the neighbor.
I wasn't prepared.
He has a degenerative tumor in the visual part of his brain.
It can be removed.
It's likely benign.
And he should be okay.
But, to him, his wife really did look like a soccer ball.
And I was a coat rack.
Two pair.
You're hustling me.
What's going on? - She's kicking my butt.
- Where's Bonnie? They held her over for a late show.
She would be a big hit in Boston.
What about our slumber party? Well, she'll be back.
Just later.
Well, this gives you and I time to spend together.
- Get to know each other.
- Great.
So tell me about yourself.
Just don't tell me you're a nightclub singer.
Good morning.
- Is Maddie up? - Not yet.
Coffee? - It's right there.
- The second show was even better.
I had them freak-dancing to Green Acres.
And I thought Cleveland was nuts.
they're singing Flipper.
You should've been there.
I want Maddie to live with me.
Sorry? I want her.
- Right.
- No, I'm serious.
Bonnie, a child needs her mother home at night not in Cleveland.
First of all, that's not fair.
And second, I am home most nights- Since New Year's you've been working nonstop.
Eventually, I'll settle into a decent schedule.
Right now- You're still trying to make it.
I understand.
But I think I can provide a better home for her.
And I want her.
It's an extremely rare phenomenon, but it has happened.
Where people don't recognize faces? Not just that, but the faces look like specific inanimate objects.
Oliver Sacks wrote of a patient who mistook his wife for a hat.
Willis evidently mistook his for a soccer ball.
Is it dementia, doctor? No.
Which explains why his behavior was otherwise normal.
The scans show his temporal lobes to be intact.
But the lesions in the left hemisphere affect his ability to visualize particularly his ability to visualize faces.
- But why a soccer ball? - We can't really explain it.
The parietal lobes of the brain make judgments about what the eyes see.
The tumor so compromises that judgment he thinks he sees different things.
In his wife's case, a soccer ball.
This happens to everybody with this kind of tumor? No.
It's rare.
There have only been a few documented cases.
- How many documented cases? - I believe about four or five.
What's the likelihood he saw a soccer ball when he looked at his wife? It's hard to quantify that.
One in 10? One in a hundred? One in a thousand? One in a million? I suppose it would be around one in a million.
Thank you.
- It's not about what you want.
- Or you.
Her father just died.
She needs stability.
Which you don't give her staying out past midnight singing Flipper.
- You don't know me- - Why do you think she came here? To meet her genetic parent.
You never heard of adopted kids-? - You told me it was a cry for help.
- I said attention.
- There's a difference.
- Come on.
- You're a struggling nightclub singer.
- You're a lawyer.
- I know the hours you put in.
- I can be home by 6:00.
- You're just gonna change your life-? - I am desperate to change.
Maddie doesn't even know you.
Nor do I know her.
But a daughter needs to be with her mother.
A genetic relationship does not make a parent.
If you think- - I didn't say that.
- Yes, you did.
Let's not say things we're gonna regret.
This should be about what's best for her.
The fact that I am not emotionally connected might make me more objective.
And less informed.
Trust me.
Ally, you have absolutely no idea.
Being her genetic mother doesn't make me a parent.
But it's not meaningless.
That's why adopted kids seek out their birth parents.
It means something.
And it means something to Maddie.
She showed up here.
And she did ask me to take her.
- What do you mean I can't close? - I'm just suggesting- I have a rapport with the jury.
We have a chance here.
This is a murder trial.
Thank you for that insight.
You've always maintained the lawyer who tries the case should close.
So how's this different? Richard, you're La da da - Easy for you to say.
- It's not easy for me to say because I love you.
You're gay? John I support your right to choose.
I'm not gay.
I'm trying to say I love you.
You're my best friend.
- So this is difficult for me to say.
- What? You have no business being in a courtroom, Richard.
You're a fine office manager.
Your employees are devoted to you.
But as a litigator you are a joke.
It'd be irresponsible of you to give the closing when a man's life is on the line.
And here, one is.
You know, you're a funny little man.
Let's not turn this personal.
You turned it personal.
You called me a joke.
You derive your esteem from being this magical little trial attorney.
- The idea I could be good threatens you.
- That's not it! It's my client, my case, my trial, and I will give the closing.
You were planning to introduce this.
You're a lousy trial lawyer, Richard.
I need to prepare my closing.
So why don't you scurry off into your hole.
It's not so much I want to leave Bonnie as - As what? - I kind of want to get her back.
What do you mean? She was my best friend before Daddy died.
We'd go shopping we'd have sleepovers.
It was always fun for us to be together.
Now it's different.
It has to be different, honey.
A parent has to be a parent.
There's gonna be rules and discipline.
I know you know that.
It's hard for her, Victor.
It's too much work.
I hear her cry at night.
Well, that's when grownups do most of their crying.
At night.
I want her to have the life she wants, the life she planned.
I'll be happier that way, and so will she.
Look at me, honey.
Do you really think you wanna live with Ally? I don't know.
But I have a good feeling about her.
And I also feel You also feel what? She really wants me.
- I think we should talk to her.
- You can't think this is her decision.
I think we should know what she's feeling.
Well, we just heard her feelings, didn't we? - Is there any harm in talking to her? - You don't have anything to lose.
I do.
I love her.
And I think I've done a pretty good job of being- I'm not judging you.
But I think Maddie came to see me for a reason and I am ready for this.
Are you? You have a lifestyle that makes it impossible- It's not impossible.
For all I know, you could be an ax murderer.
Well, see, you know I'm not an ax murderer because Maddie told me you had a PI check me out.
Why did you do that? Why do that if you weren't prepared for the possibility of me parenting her? Because I knew she'd want to visit you.
I think you could make for a great mother.
But at this point in your life, your career Be honest.
One in a million.
Those are the odds he actually saw a soccer ball instead of his wife.
Those are the odds their own expert gave.
One in a million.
Come on, his wife had an affair.
He killed her.
His excuse is the one-in-a-million chance that he confused her for an inanimate object.
He killed her.
And his defense is as desperate as he is guilty.
When Janet Willis first met my client, she wasn't interested.
She dated him just for kicks.
That's what she said.
As she became interested, she asked herself the usual questions: "Does he make a good living? Does he want children? Will he be a good father?" She neglected to ask herself "Will he confuse my head for a soccer ball?" 'Cause that could never happen.
But it did.
Kendall Willis developed a brain tumor in his parietal lobe which caused him to see things that weren't there.
Unbelievable? Almost.
Impossible? No.
It's happened on rare occasions.
As Dr.
Ober testified to, Oliver Sacks once treated a man who thought his wife was a hat.
The prosecution says this is far-fetched.
And you know what? It is.
Sometimes the truth is stranger than fiction.
Can we positively know what Kendall Willis was seeing? Of course not.
None of us ever have, or will, walk a mile in his cleats.
Here's something we do know here's what is impossible, ladies and gentlemen: You can't fake a brain tumor.
- I feel weird having to make a choice.
- We're not asking you to do that.
- You're asking me what I think.
- No, we want to know what you feel.
How I feel.
I feel like there's a hole.
A hole? Yeah.
I never had a mom.
When Daddy was alive I always felt a hole, I guess.
Not knowing who you were Something was missing.
And when he died, the hole got bigger.
And now Can I talk to Ally alone? Sure.
Are you ready for this? Really? Not only am I ready, but you just answered my question as to why I'm so ready for this.
You know, I've always had a hole too, Maddie.
I always thought it was gonna be filled up with a man.
And yet, I could never picture him.
Well, maybe the man turned out to be you.
Maybe it's been you.
And I know that this sounds crazy but it's as if I have always known you were out there.
Well, it's as if a part of me just knew.
And now, it just It just makes so much sense that you're here.
I've spent so much money on therapists trying to figure out who is that guy.
And now it turned out that the guy is a 10-year-old girl.
And she's home.
Would I call you "Mom"? I don't think I've quite earned that, so why don't we start off with- Step thing.
- Ally? - Ally.
Can't he just read it out loud? The foreman announces the verdict.
It's a new thing they're trying.
Foreman, has the jury reached its verdict? We have, Your Honor.
This is where he'll tell us.
What say you? In the matter of the Commonwealth v.
Kendall Willis on the charge of murder in the first degree, we find the defendant not guilty.
People of the jury, this concludes your service.
- Winning streak extended to one.
- Thank you.
- Good luck with the surgery.
- Thank you.
- John, thank you as well.
- My pleasure.
Just a second.
I'm no expert on how to live life but if one were in the habit of mistaking people for inanimate objects, should he see a ball lying on the beach probably best not to run up and kick it.
Especially if one were to be having marital difficulties with that ball.
Yeah, just a thought.
How lucky can one guy be? I kissed her and she kissed me Like the fellow once said Ain't that a kick in the head - Richard? - John? I still feel estranged.
- Gee.
- I apologize for doubting you.
And I want you to know, I feel you tried an exceptional case.
I do, Richard.
You really were great.
- I was? - Indeed.
Well, you tumbled the brain thing.
But you tried the case.
You secured his acquittal.
And I must say, this sudden dash for the end zone of maturity I salute you.
I was looking for some forward progress, that's all.
Tell me quick Ain't that a kick in the head
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