Angelyne (2022) s01e03 Episode Script

Glow in the Dark Queen of the Universe

1 Angelyne! It was a real loss to the city when Frederick's of Hollywood closed.
There is where I get my underwear now all handmade and original, of course.
Yeah, of course.
I had billboards all around here.
I got famous just like that.
I was there for everything.
I was on all the phone calls.
I was on all the billboard shoots.
It's a nonstop roller coaster.
You see, she's up there with Marilyn, Greta Garbo.
Classic Hollywood that's how I saw her from day one.
I came to town for work, and I figured I'd do some sightseeing.
"Simon & Simon," "Knight Rider," and "The A-Team.
" There are moments in life that defy all logic, when the cosmos decides to bring you in on the secret.
Yeah, I mean, that was a bit much And you just have to be ready to listen.
Excuse me, Angelyne? My name is Rick Krause.
I'm a fellow artist and a huge fan.
I am in town doing celebrity portraits, and to my mind, God's honest truth, hand to my heart, no truer Hollywood celebrity exists today than you.
She liked my paintings so much, she asked if I'd help out around the office.
Just basic stuff, you know calls, bills.
She knows it's a drought, but she needs the water.
How many how many gallons of water is the actual quota that you're ra Well, isn't there, like, a celebrity dispensation or something? The woman needs to ablute.
Would you please, ma'am, deal with me like a human being and put down your script and Oh, good.
You're still here, Rick.
I'd like to offer you a full-time job as my office manager.
- Oh, no way.
- Mm-hmm.
Uh, what are what are the hours? 9:00 until 1:00.
- Is that 9:00 until 1:00 p.
- Or or 1:00 in the morning? 9:00 until one of us dies.
Oh, cool.
You have to realize that when Angelyne showed up, L.
needed her.
I mean, thanks to Reagan and his cronies, homelessness was on the rise.
Everyone's getting lung cancer because of pollution, and then Angelyne provided color and humor and - And essence, my essence.
- Yeah, and essence.
She she brightened up a otherwise grim landscape.
And I do believe that her hot-pink image was it was an escape for the collective consciousness of the city.
Good, good.
Now do it from the top with the essence part, but make it natural.
You have to realize that when Angelyne showed up, L.
needed her.
Angelyne! Angelyne.
I don't like to talk about what's next.
I like to talk about now.
- Barbie.
- Hey, sweetie.
Are you Barbie? - Angelyne! Hey! - You want to go out with me? Mm-mm.
I don't know, but obviously she's doing something right because she's up there and we're down here.
This is great.
Oh, wow.
I've never seen anything like this.
Looking good.
Here she comes! Whoo! The lady of the hour.
Here we go.
I knew she'd like it.
So? - Truly magnificent.
- Mm-hmm.
I sure hope this 22 grand pays off.
It's always money, money, money.
You got to be in the now, now, now, honey.
I bet people will talk about this 100 years from now.
Like this? That's beautiful.
- Oh, Jesus.
- Oh.
It's working.
Holy shit.
Here, I thought she peaked back with the billboards.
Boy, was I wrong.
Just talked to a guy who flew all the way out from Sweden for a lunch date with her.
Her allure is wild.
Lucky of you, she's here today.
Should I go get her now? All right, come on.
Let's go.
- Coming here? - I think he's coming here.
Oh, God, okay.
Um, shoes.
Shoes, shoes.
Left, right.
This is the kind of crowd Angelyne brings.
- Done.
- Bobby, Sue.
Oh, you know, I'm gonna be on the TV.
- Help me.
- Yeah, let me get Get the pillow.
Quick, quick.
Where do you want me? Um, on the couch like you're watching.
Okay, teeth.
Pull your skirt down.
- Good? - Have a good show.
My God, it's Angelyne.
I have been trying to get you on the show for years, and now you have this ten-story wall in Hollywood.
It's so big.
Well, I just really like things big, Russell.
Whoa, we're on TV here.
Angelyne, we're just dying to know about you.
Do you promise to open up to us? Only if you open up to me first.
Honey, come look, Angelyne's on.
Do you ever get tired of the attention? No, I have an insatiable appetite for three things I bought her those sunglasses.
First, attention.
Second, teasing.
Third, money.
Isn't money adorable? - It's so green a pretty.
- It is.
So how many billboards do you actually have right now? Isn't this that lady you know? - 193 billboards.
- Aah! But what everybody's dying to know is, what exactly do you do? I make boys horny.
The rest of us work for a living.
Is there anything more to you? There's so much suffering in the world, and I am a divine sex goddess presence for people to discover and relate to.
And then they pay me.
At 2,300 an hour for an appearance.
It's up to 2,400 now, thanks to you.
Now we know that you're busy doing whatever it is you do exactly, but is Angelyne at her peak? I'll be peaking soon.
I bet you will.
It's all about the tease with men.
Men like to make women feel powerless, and teasing is how we get the power back.
So that's exactly what I did with Hugh Hefner.
Angelyne, please take a seat.
Make yourself at home.
You know, you have a real Marilyn quality about you.
You know, she was on the cover of our first issue we did in '53, you know? Oh, I know.
Marilyn is my art mother of sorts.
Well, I bet she is.
I also know that she never gave you consent to use her photos.
You bought them from another man who paid her pennies to take them several years earlier because she needed to make her car payment.
And then you used them to launch your empire.
And voilà! Ah.
You are a multimillionaire, and she's dead.
But I'm rambling.
You know all this.
What's your pitch, Hugh? Why do you have such a hard-on to meet me? You have your billboards, but I know there's more.
Tell me more.
Who is the real Angelyne? That's the story I want.
Don't you love the not knowing? The desperate energy As it builds up inside of you as you wonder, as it drives you mad? That way I can be whoever whatever however you want me to be.
You know, one of our photographers suggested you for our "celebrity of the year" issue? She said that you have more sex appeal with your clothes on than all the other girls she shot with their clothes off.
That is so sweet.
You should tell your photographer to join my fan club.
But I'm not interested in those photos of you.
I thought it was made clear I would never pose with my clothes off? It was made abundantly clear, Angelyne.
You know, millions of girls dream of an opportunity like this.
That's cute, but I'm not millions of girls.
- See, I don't need this.
- Oh.
I have 200 billboards all over Los Angeles but I'd love to find a way to help you out.
Maybe I can license you a few of the photos that Freddy took.
Perhaps you commission Rick to write the article.
Otherwise I'm struggling to see what's in it for me.
I'm offering advice on how to maximize your potential.
It sounds like you're trying to get me to take my clothes off and give you my story so you can sell more copies of your magazine.
If you want the story of my life It's on a wall at the corner of Hollywood and Vine.
It's hard to miss.
It was a pleasure to meet you, Hugh.
Let's go, boys.
I didn't know who the hell I was when I first met her.
All I saw was this badass rebel queen who didn't give a fuck about what she was supposed to do with her life, her body, her sexuality.
She just put it all out there for the world to see.
You're a rebel, Angelyne.
- Telling Hugh Hefner no? - Mm-hmm.
I would've paid good money to see the look on his face.
To be honest, his face never actually changed its expression beyond a general smugness.
I'm proud of you, Angelyne.
- Harold? - Yeah.
- You know anything about - foot fetishes? I can't say I do.
Why do you ask? We have this German fan.
He's asking for something more personal.
So what, does he want your shoes? No, I already sent him some heels, but now he wants a video.
Well, as long as you're not doing anything that makes you feel uncomfortable, then I can't see the harm.
Just be careful.
The the more you put out there, the more people are gonna want to get something from you, you know? I am too delicate for this heat.
Speak quickly, I've got lunch with Allee in 10 minutes, and I'm already 30 minutes late.
Uh, we just got a call.
This is big.
I mean, this is actually, like, bigger than big.
- Julien Temple called.
- Give me context, Rick.
You can't just assume I know who you're talking about.
I meet a lot of people.
Directed, uh, "The Great Rock 'n' Roll Swindle," "Absolute Beginners," and now he wants you to star in his next movie, "Earth Girls are Easy.
" Oh, my God.
He said, and I quote, "Angelyne is like Greek mythology.
" - Oh, this is huge.
- Totally.
I won't audition.
I'm done with that.
And I will only play myself.
Yes, must be billed as Angelyne.
What else? Oh, in a happy bit of symbiosis, "Los Angeles" magazine wants to send a journalist to do a feature profile on you.
Maybe we are saying "yes" to too many things.
Life is a big negotiation buying a car, freeing a hostage, running for president, agreeing to a feature in a magazine.
Rather than just saying "yes," you keep the other side talking, and eventually they will reveal to you what it is they actually want, and once you know that, you have the power to get what you want or what we want, which should be what I want.
Which is what we all want.
Uh, next, although I do vehemently disagree on this, I did as you requested and turned down Oprah.
Thank God.
Planes are Too claustrophobic.
But we do actually have an interesting offer, and these people have zero interest in your past "Hot Seat" with Wally George.
Ew, fuck that guy.
- Language.
- Who is Wally George? He's a very popular, very colorful, very conservative talk show host down in Orange County.
Yeah, that's one way to put it.
Yeah, he's controversial, but that is nothing that Angelyne can't handle.
And besides, we are looking for platforms for her music video.
Well, I'm sure Oprah would've played the music video.
Oprah digs into people's pasts and makes them cry on her couch.
- I don't need that.
- You're missing the point Maybe you're missing the point? Don't you think so, Rick? Freddy? You see? That is what your negative energy does, okay? I need to get the video out there.
- Let's book it.
- Booked.
Okay, here.
This is to Fritz in Germany.
- Is it hot in here? - Is that fan still broken? It feels hot.
Can we can we open a window? Would you open a goddamn window, please? - Coming.
- This is to Dennis in Sweden.
No, don't open the window.
It's 100 degrees out.
Please, close the goddamn window, Andre.
C-can you give me a moment? Ooh.
I'm back.
Where were we? Are you ready? Here he is that hard-hitting, award-winning conservative voice of television, Wally George.
Wally! Wally! Wally! - Oh, Wally George? - Oh, I'll never forget that.
It was like a goddamn lion's den.
Fucking Orange County, man.
I took it as a big middle finger to the queer community that embraced her.
Spend five minutes watching videos of Wally George on YouTube, you'll know exactly what I'm talking about.
But that's Angelyne.
Anything to sell another T-shirt.
Welcome back, everybody, and our guest is Angelyne, who is famous for absolutely nothing! Nothing! I think you're gonna fall out of that dress any second.
Now, listen, Angelyne, I'm gonna ask you something serious.
I-I mean, don't you feel a little self-conscious dressed in that kind of a revealing outfit? - No.
- No.
I think you should be a little more modest.
Don't you think so? all: No! I would like to see Angelyne with a little more modesty.
I think Angelyne would look a lot better in a in a turtleneck sweater, don't you? No! Do you have the feeling Do you have the feeling she might be a bimbo? Yeah! We have some guys in the audience who are dying to ask you a question.
Will you consent to answer some questions? Well, if they're dying, of course.
Okay, number one, your name and your question.
- Go ahead.
- Uh, my name's Phil.
Yes, they're real.
Are you gonna do this until they won't let you do it any more, until you have too many wrinkles or Wrinkles are darling.
I don't know.
I wonder if you ever considered settling down and, uh, raising a family or being married or if you're gonna do this for the rest of your life? Will you ever settle down and have kiddies? No.
Would you approve of your kids doing this? - Pardon me? - Would you approve of your kids doing the same thing that you're doing now? You don't really know what I do.
You don't really know who I am.
I could be extraterrestrial, for all you know.
I understand Hold it.
I understand that you have made a rock video.
Here it is, Angelyne's video.
I'm so sorry.
I should've Freddy and I have been filming some really incredible material.
You should find someone to release it and make a documentary of me.
And I have an idea for a magazine called "Hot Pink," where my fans can contribute.
They already send me so much wonderful love and I-I want to be able to share that with the world.
Hollywood is a 24-hour-a-day movie, and a lot of times, you don't even realize that what's going on is a movie or a TV show.
It's Our field of vision is so small.
Like, I remember one time, I saw a man jump off a building on my block, and I ran as fast as I could to help.
And what do I see? There's a giant airbag and hundreds of crew, cameras, the whole ordeal.
I mean, that's Hollywood.
It's a fun place.
It's also a dangerous place.
I think that might be one of them now.
- Are you sure? - Not really.
- Good enough for me.
- How was that? That was Oscar worthy, but we got to go, - like, 30 minutes ago.
- Don't tell me what to do.
The writer from the "Los Angeles" magazine - is probably there right now.
- I'll be ready when I'm ready.
They have makeup people there.
Those people don't know what they're doing.
I am here for a reason.
The universe supports me.
I'm not confined by the limitations of this dimension.
No one affects me.
I do the affecting.
What? Why can't I just write my own lines? I don't talk like that.
'Cause you're not in the union.
It's a Writers Guild thing.
We have to go right now.
Yes, can I help you? Yes, um, I'm looking for Rachel.
There's no Rachel here.
I think, uh, you've got the wrong address.
I don't know anybody by that name.
Who else are you talking to? Wow.
I can't stop staring.
I just I just can't believe we're sitting across from each other.
My parents aren't gonna believe it either.
I saw your painting on the news when I was in Morocco long story and I, uh I recognized you immediately.
Even with your whole new look, I just knew right away that it was you.
Why are you here? Uh, well, you know I, uh I brought some stuff that I thought you might want that you left behind.
Also, just came to say hi and congratulations.
Are you talking to the press? No.
No, no, no, no.
That that's not what this is about.
Because if you are I need to know.
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
No, I'm - You can't be a part of this.
- I can't be a part of what? I think I'm a little lost here.
I truly just came here out of love.
Just a simple hello, and I have your old passports, some old high-school photos that I took, your our wedding photos.
I don't want any of that.
That's not That's not Angelyne.
No, but it it is you, Rachel.
I-it's time for you to leave.
Will you at least acknowledge what we had together so I know I'm not crazy? There is nothing to acknowledge because that is not a part of me.
But it is a part of me.
This isn't about you.
This is my story.
This is my story, too.
You are a big part of my story.
You can't just erase people like that.
I can do whatever I want.
You don't exist.
Excuse What a weirdo.
You share these incredibly intimate moments with someone you loved, and they're able to look you in the eye years later and say that none of it mattered? You don't matter? It doesn't exist? It hurts.
The truth is I have always been Angelyne.
And that's the only story you need to know.
I think Angelyne is here.
Ma'am, you okay? What are you doing? Angelyne.
We're right this way.
So the guy from "L.
" magazine wants to do your interview between your two scenes.
- Is that okay with you? - Mm-hmm.
Is Rick still coming? Mm-hmm.
This is your trailer.
Everything's set up just the way you like it.
What is this? What is this? So, since the character in the script is named Gas Girl, someone from production credited you as such, but we're going to fix it.
It was made clear that the only part I will play is Angelyne, not Gas Girl, not Eyes on gas girl? Is she on set? - I'm Angelyne.
- Right.
A-and what I'm saying is, it wasn't written for you.
It's a character at a gas station.
I don't care what you think.
Fix it.
Or I will find somebody who will.
It's a two-second cameo, for fuck's sake.
No one cares, not about the credit and certainly not about you.
I don't.
I'm out.
Nobody quits me.
I did care about her.
I do.
She would say, "Life is pain, and everyone is suffering.
And the sooner you can get out of it, the better.
" Her positivity was her way of coping with that darkness.
I'm not a woman.
I'm an icon.
I'm not a woman.
I'm an icon.
I'm not a woman.
I'm an icon.
I'm not a woman.
I'm an icon.
I'm Angelyne.
What's the one thing that you know, hmm? It's how you feel.
If you're frightened, you want to leave.
If you love it, you want to stay.
My quest is to feel good all the time, but it can be challenging in this reality.
I have no respect for what this reality does to people.
So I evolved.
I left my body and became pure energy.
It was so warm and loving.
It was pure good, all light.
Like a, um, out-of-body experience? Mm, I've been trying to go back ever since.
Earth is like a bus bench for cosmic bums, but the bus never comes.
We're all trapped in this awful terrarium, but there are seams where the positivity can get through and help you connect to what it is you truly want.
- What kind of a kid were you? - Sad, lonely.
Why? Well, Back in Ohio, I lost my parents at a young age.
It made me look for attention with my tricks.
I said, "Well I'm going to get the love of the world.
" And how old were you when they passed away? Five and under.
Five or under? This is me, my band.
"Kiss Me L.
," right? Yeah, I know this one.
I want to go back to your parents.
So back in Ohio You know what's so special about this song? - What? - It only has two lyrics.
- Do you know what they are? - Mm-mm.
- I thought you were a fan.
- No, I am a fan.
I just didn't know that "You know I'm getting off on you" and "kiss me, L.
" "Kiss me, L.
," yeah.
And all my music has been inspired by aliens.
Let's go back to something you said a moment ago in regards to your parents See? Two lyrics.
Let them wash over you like a mantra.
Angelyne, you've got to give me something here.
I'm trying to give you inner peace.
She called me spiritually constipated and dragged me to a tchotchke shop.
It would take us weeks to unblock all of that.
Then I'm going to need something extra for protection.
Protection from something in particular, doll? - Negativity, "intrusivity" - Hmm.
- Prying eyes.
- Mm.
This one will combat fixation and sorcery.
This one keeps people from fucking with your head.
Thank you, mommy, and him? What do you think, uh - rose quartz? - Mm.
It's by the intention pouches.
So how long have y'all known each other for? 1,000 lifetimes, since she was a queen in ancient Egypt.
A long time before Idaho.
Well, which is it, Angelyne, Ohio or Idaho? If you won't let other people talk to me, then you have to talk to me.
Tell me where you grew up.
When did you move to L.
? You are completely missing the point of who I am.
It is the essence, the inspiration, and that is what I am giving you.
I need more than essence and inspiration, okay? I need a story that I can print in "The Hollywood Reporter.
" Okay, you know what? I don't think this is gonna work out.
I'm sorry.
Good luck with your Indiegogo campaign.
It was nice to meet you.
What if I Show you something I've never show anybody before? A seam in the cosmic structure of the universe.
You know, you could've told me.
My clothes? Sweetie, this is my show.
Nobody's looking at you.
- Angelyne.
- Hi.
Angelyne, you're an icon.
Darling, everyone's waiting.
One two three four five six seven eight nine materialize.
Cosma Shiva! Galaxina! In any case, we are in space.
In any case, we are in space.
In any case, we are in space.
In any case, we are in space.
Cosma Shiva! Galaxina! Cosma Shiva! Galaxina! Cosma Shiva! Galaxina! Ooh.
Cosma Shiva! Galaxina! In that moment in that light, I saw her the way that she wanted me to see her.
He wanted to understand who I am, but he didn't ask any good questions.
This is who I am.
I engage with people.
I take them to a higher plane.
- Having fun? - It's a party.
So when does this publish? I'm not sure this will publish.
You have to.
I need my billboard.
I honestly don't know how to describe what happened today.
I really don't.
I know that you love me and you do not want to hurt me.
I guess I'll try to think of something.
What you see here is everything you need to know about me.
All you need is now.
Did I get the truth about her? No, but I wanted to help her.
So I wrote a vibe piece, and I was right.
The article was good for her, and she got her billboard.
But about two years later, the truth magically did fall in my lap.
He said he worked at a government agency.
He said he was a hobby genealogist, but I can't tell you who it is.
I don't reveal my sources.
Hi, I'm Jeff Glaser.
I think you, uh, emailed me.
Holy shit.
Actually, "The Hollywood Reporter" wasn't even the first to figure out the whole truth about Angelyne's past.
This college kid cracked the whole case wide open well before Jeff.
My name is Max Allen, and I started making a documentary about Angelyne in 2012.
And as far as I know, I was the first person to discover the whole truth about Angelyne, so Yeah, I guess you could say I learned a lot.
One thing I learned was that Angelyne doesn't think in the traditional beginning, middle, and end.
You ask her, she was always going up.
There was never a peak, certainly never a down period, but that's simply not true.

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