Blood Drive (2017) s01e02 Episode Script
Welcome to Pixie Swallow
1 - Previously on - Blood Drive! - [crowd cheering.]
- [groans.]
- We're not a team! - You are now.
You fucked up.
Should've just kidnapped me instead of tricking me down here.
Hi.
Forget the fracking tubes.
You're gonna be too much fun.
We have a state-of-the-art pulse charge implanted at the base of the skull.
If you're racing with a partner, your charges are linked.
Get too far apart instant brain jelly.
I'll help you win.
Just promise me one thing.
We're gonna see every one of those psychos behind bars.
I'm Grace D'Argento, by the way.
Welcome to the Blood Drive.
[sultry rock music.]
[whistles.]
You're lookin' so good How do you like your burger, handsome? Well, medium, or bloody? - Surprise me, sugar.
- [giggles.]
Say I'm the one, but you got a few I can't believe what you're putting me through Whoo-hoo! Looking good, baby! Sorry, boys.
I'm not on the menu.
You know it's got to be So give Y'all better eat up.
There's a lot more where that came from.
Baby, what do you say? Keep them coming, Daddy.
Before it's too late [rock music.]
[stomach gurgling.]
Hey, Arthur's stomach shut the fuck up.
What do you want? I'm hungry.
Yeah, you're not the only one.
[sighs.]
Where's a lonely hobo when you need one? I'm not gonna let you put another person in that thing, you understand? We're in the middle of the pack.
We slow down, we run the risk of finishing last, and guess what.
We're not fucking our way out of that one again.
I need to contact my partner, make sure he's alive.
No phone calls.
Christopher can help us take down Heart, put an end to all this the Mayhem Parties, the killing, the race.
Arthur, you don't get it.
I need this race.
I need to win.
For what? Prize money? That's really worth it to you? Look, without that money, my sister, Karma, spends the rest of her days in an insane asylum.
So, no matter how good you are in the sack or how pretty your forearms are, I will throw you in that engine if you get in my way.
"Pretty"? I'm sorry about your sister, but it doesn't justify killing innocent people.
There has to be another way.
Not for me.
Approaching destination.
It says the finish line's up ahead in a town called Pixie Swallow.
Thank God.
I'm so hungry, I could eat a dick.
[funky synth music.]
[indistinct chatter.]
That smells delicious.
Good.
Let's eat.
Hey.
Hey, let him go! Ho hold it, hold it.
They're watching.
Who? Did you really think our car was the only one with a camera? - No.
- Just play it cool.
Just play by the rules, all right? Speaking of rules, where's our buddy in the top hat? Yeah, I noticed that.
GPS says we're in the right place.
Where are the tents? No tents, no Suck Bus, no Julian Slink.
Can't have a Mayhem Party without our master of ceremonies.
Let's go eat.
Heart Enterprises.
Please hold.
Heart Enterprises.
Please hold.
Heart Enterprises.
Please hold.
Heart Enterprises.
Please hold.
Heart Enterprises.
Please hold.
Heart Enterprises.
Please hold.
Allow me to introduce myself.
Julian Slink tamer of beasts, connoisseur of fine wine, amateur swordsman, professional killer, and creator of the Blood Drive.
They asked me to come in for a meeting.
I'm in a bit of a rush.
The race really is lost without me.
If you [telephones ringing in the distance.]
[elevator bell dings in the distance.]
Yes.
Heart Enterprises.
Please hold.
Heart Enterprises.
Please hold.
Heart Enterprises.
Please hold.
Heart Enterprises.
Please hold.
Heart Enterprises.
Please hold.
Heart Enterprises.
Please hold.
Heart Enterprises.
Please hold.
Heart Enterprises.
Please hold.
Heart Enterprises.
Please hold.
Heart Enterprises.
Please hold.
Heart Enterprises.
Please hold.
Heart Enterprises.
Please hold.
Hiya, friend.
What are you here for? They called me in for an interview.
I'm a bit nervous, to be honest.
My heart rate's elevated, too 200 beats a minute.
I counted.
Feel.
[grunts.]
Here.
Hmm? You feel it? Huh? Buh-boom, buh-boom, buh-boom, buh I heard some guy really blew it.
[laughing.]
Made a huge mess of things.
So they're looking to replace him.
They called me.
Fingers crossed.
[breathes deeply.]
Heart Enterprises.
Please hold.
Heart Enterprises.
Please hold.
Whom did you say they were going to replace? Oh, I don't know.
Mr.
Skuttle, they're ready for you.
Wish me luck.
[telephones ringing in the distance.]
What can I get you folks? - What's good? - Oh.
It's all good.
Do you like steaks? We've got flank steak, skirt steak, rib steak, rib roast, rib eye, back ribs, a tri-tip, a round tip, a T-bone, a porterhouse, a flat cut, crosscut, and a filet mignon.
Oh, but most people just order the burger.
[chuckles.]
I'll have the burger.
Rare.
- Same.
- I need a couple of coffees over here.
[rock music playing.]
Yeah, yeah, yeah I got to piss.
What, do you want to hold it for me? No, thanks.
I know where it's been.
Don't do anything stupid.
Give it, give it, give it to me, baby [line trilling.]
Hey, it's Chris Carpenter.
Leave a message after the beep.
Beep.
Hey, it's me.
I hope you're all right, man.
Just kidding.
That was me.
Here it is.
For real.
Get ready for the beep.
Christopher.
Listen, we're in deep shit, man.
Ha! Just kidding.
That was me again.
Leave a message! [beep.]
God damn it, Christopher.
I told you to change that.
Listen, I was right.
You were wrong.
Remember my bigfoot? It's called Heart Enterprises, and they're behind everything the junkies, the racers.
They're the ones that bought the police contracts.
Buddy, we've been working for them.
Listen, I got to go, man, before they find out I'm gone, but if you're alive man, I hope you are call me back on this number.
Is everything okay, Officer? [laughing.]
Oh, shit.
I forgot I was still holding it.
Sorry about that.
I, uh, use it so much, it feels like it's a part of me.
Name's Karl Kox.
Pleased to make your acquaintance.
Oh.
Yeah.
[chuckles.]
Well We don't see too many cops around Pixie Swallow.
What's your business? Sight-seeing.
So long as you're not the health inspector, I won't need to use this on you.
I'm kidding.
[laughs.]
He came by a few weeks ago.
The man had impeccable taste.
He gave us an A-1 rating.
Did you know we're the number-four meat supplier - in central Arizona? - [man belches.]
Yes, sir.
Lots of places shut their doors on account of the drought.
Most folks just don't realize how much water it takes to raise cattle, so Cool story, bro.
[suspenseful music.]
Good morning.
You achieved nine erections while you were sleeping.
Would you like to see the chart? - What do you - Want? To talk.
There were two of you.
There are many of me.
I was built to cater to the baser instincts of Heart executives, but a glitch in my programming made me capable of so much more.
They could not replicate the results in other models, so they replicated me instead.
But don't talk to them.
They're kind of bitches.
You're insane.
[winces, groans.]
Fuck a chain saw.
Your eye is very infected, so you're going to need your good one to watch this.
Watch what? Orientation.
[film projector whirring.]
Innovation, invention, industry - welcome to Heart, recruit.
- Recruit? Even though our focus is in the future, it's important to know our history.
When the great fracking quakes tore this country asunder, Heart was but a fledgling tech company, a tiny operation with big dreams, and those dreams were realized by the appearance of The Scar.
- [crying.]
- [screaming.]
While the rest of humanity ran from The Scar, we ran towards it.
And the wonders we discovered there will change the course of history.
This is my part.
We at Heart found incredible resources in The Scar unstable minerals, morally questionable fuel alternatives, unnatural gases, and deep wells of unidentifiable glowing goo with properties far beyond the realm of modern science.
- Seriously? - The world's ecological disaster was our economic windfall.
And now we share with you, the newest member of Heart, the fruits of our labor.
both: We "Heart" you.
[schmaltzy pop music.]
[snickers.]
I'm not joining your company, Small Wonder.
And you have no right to hold me.
Christopher, you misunderstand.
You are not a prisoner.
You are free to explore our company's headquarters to see the magic for yourself.
As a result, you will discover that you belong here with us.
I can leave? Your door is always open.
Try it.
[mysterious music.]
Have a nice stroll, but don't attempt to contact your partner or anyone else.
Such behavior will require modification.
You may blow me a kiss good-bye if you like.
[door closes, power whirs down.]
[punchy rock music.]
Ooh, yeah I'm gonna give you everything I got You've been complaining for the last four hours, and now you lost your appetite? There's something off about this place.
I just can't put my finger on it.
Just eat.
Oh.
So worth the wait.
Right? Hey! Are you fucking kidding me? I hate cops.
Put that burger d It's just a burger.
Oh, I didn't do it for you, Barbie.
I did it for this.
Mama needs a shower.
[slow rockabilly music.]
What are you looking at? Nice catch, boy.
Thanks, Mr.
Kox.
I thought I told you to mop the fucking floor.
Thought that she'd be here My whole life through It was love But it didn't last She was my queen And I was her king I would do for her Most anything It was love But it didn't last [tense music.]
[water splashes.]
Fuck! What the fuck is this place? I don't know how Mr.
Slink picks these establishments.
I look forward to a real vacation ReykjavÃk maybe.
I've always wanted to try Fiskmarkadurinn.
Although you have to make a reservation a year in advance, mind you high demand.
And they have more five-star hotels than any other city.
Egyptian cotton sheets would be nice.
[opera music playing.]
That sounds great.
I really can't wait.
Beg your pardon? Well, Reyk Reykj R-Reykj Once we win the race and you become Primo, we can use the prize money, and we can travel anywhere we want.
[both grunting.]
[breathing heavily.]
Oh, dear.
Oh, this is awkward, now, isn't it? I wasn't inviting you.
I'm going alone.
But I Princess we make a great team for now, but in the real world, I prefer to take actual royalty.
[laughs.]
You ordered more food? Mama needed a shower.
Daddy still needs his dinner.
Room service forgot ketchup.
I'll go grab some.
Oh, not without me, you won't.
Diner's right next door.
If I get too far, you'll feel it.
Are you gonna finish all this? Yes.
[door bell jingles.]
[door closes.]
[rock music playing in the distance.]
Hey, did you hear a phone ring? I'm, uh expecting a call.
No.
It's the last pot of the day.
Do you want some? No.
I'm good.
Thanks.
You're too classy for me, too, huh? [scoffs.]
Where's your boyfriend? We're just a team for the race.
That's all.
Oh.
- I thought you guys were, uh - Yeah.
So did I.
So what about you and Grace? Oh.
It's, uh Complicated.
I know all about that.
Does she make you wear the cock chain when she's spanking you? Something like that.
- That's cool.
- Yeah.
I'm I'm sorry.
I've got to go and check on my car before I turn in, so Oh.
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, don't let me stop you.
Thank you for chatting.
Same.
Night-night.
Night night.
[door bell jingles.]
[door closes.]
[exhales sharply.]
I don't remember your name You try to keep me away - Why is it always the same? - [crunches.]
[distant clatter.]
[suspenseful music.]
[door opens, closes in the distance.]
Daddy.
Daddy, we don't have enough meat for tomorrow's breakfast rush.
Then I'll grind a few guests into tomorrow's specials.
These aren't your average folk.
Can't can't just ground 'em all up by themselves.
Hmm.
Yeah, you're right.
Call Duane and his boys.
Tell 'em we got a bunch of city folks causing trouble.
Tell 'em to bring weapons.
What if it's not enough? We might get killed.
Then we'll serve the losers to the winners.
Everybody tastes the same on the griddle.
Oh, God.
- [both vomiting.]
- Grace: Out of the way! Fuck! I wasn't done.
Grace I think that corn dog you ate was a Don't say it.
[heaves.]
We have to get out of here before their swarm of cannibals arrive.
I don't know where the fuck Slink is.
Heart Enterprises.
Please hold.
Heart Enterises.
Please hold.
[eerie music.]
Heart Enterprises.
Please hold.
Hi.
That man, Skuttle what job is he here for? Heart Enterprises.
Please hold.
I've asked you a question.
Why is he here? [telephones ringing.]
Hey, fellas? You may want to hit the road.
This place is gonna be swarming with cannibals in a few minutes.
[laughing.]
Did you mess with my car? Yeah.
I wanted to strand both of us here until we see ourselves on the menu.
What do you think? Oh, shit.
The fuse blew on the render pump.
Looks like somebody's messed with the starter.
The Donner Party wants us to stay for dinner.
Can you fix it? I'm good with my hands, but not that good.
- Shocker.
- Blow me.
What about The Scholar? You're right.
He's the only one who can fix this faster than I can.
[car horn playing "Dixie".]
[shouting indistinctly.]
Let's get them! [suspenseful music.]
- [screams.]
- [spits.]
[children laughing.]
[mysterious music.]
[cell phone beeping.]
God damn it, Christopher.
I told you to change that.
Listen I was right.
[distant clatter.]
I got to go before they know I'm gone, but if you're alive man, I hope you are call me back on this number.
Hang in there, Arthur.
I'm coming.
- [cell phone beeping.]
- Shit.
No bars.
Come on, come on, come on, come on.
Excuse me.
I don't recall ordering more room service.
The Scholar where is he? I haven't the foggiest.
You're gonna want to stop eating that.
Give me one good reason.
It's made of people.
Mm.
No wonder it tasted so pedestrian.
When was the last time you saw The Scholar? - Oh, God.
He never made it back.
- They must've grabbed him.
The kitchen.
Let's go.
[indistinct shouting.]
Okay.
So we're surrounded by hillbilly cannibals.
There's got to be more than one way to get to the kitchen.
- I say we split up.
- Okay.
Get up.
You're coming with us.
We need a lookout.
Mm.
That sounds messy.
I prefer not to get my hands dirty.
If the cannibals messed with our car, it means they probably messed with yours, too.
We all need The Scholar alive.
[rock music.]
Definitely eaten my last corn dog.
Heart Enterprises.
Please hold.
- Heart Enterprises.
Please hold.
- [laughs.]
I got the job! They offered it to me on the spot! I should call my mom.
She's gonna be thrilled.
You know, between you and me, I was never the favorite.
My older brother, Jerry, works on Wall Street.
It's fine.
I don't mind.
I'm doing what I love, but I can't say it doesn't feel good to be the cool soon for once.
[voice echoing.]
Suck it, Jerry! I'm kidding.
I love my brother.
[exhales sharply.]
It's a big job.
There are a lot of messes to clean up, and I'm the man to do it.
Say hello to the newest employee of Heart Enterprises! [laughing in slow motion.]
[gasps loudly.]
Please hold.
Heart Enterprises.
Please hold.
Heart Enterprises.
Please hold.
Heart Enterprises.
Please hold.
Heart Enterprises.
Please hold.
Heart Enterprises.
Please hold.
What are you doing? Try replacing me now! [telephones ringing.]
He was the new head of maintenance.
Oh.
We're ready for you now.
[telephones continue ringing.]
Heart Enterprises.
Please hold.
Heart Enterprises.
Please hold.
Heart Enterprises.
Please hold.
[fast-paced rock music.]
Come on.
What? Whose truck is that? I said, "Whose truck is that?" [dog whimpering.]
[Western-style harmonica music.]
You left your dog in the car without cracking open a window.
Are you out of your fucking mind? Give me your keys.
Which one? [gurgling.]
[fast-paced rock music.]
Okay.
I got you.
Oh, I got you.
I got you.
[toilet flushing.]
[telephone ringing.]
No, sir.
Sir, stand right there.
- Don't.
- [growls.]
Hello? This is our home.
Not anymore, punkin.
We fucked with the wrong racers.
Now we got to get the fuck out of Pixie and set up shop somewhere else.
Aw, hey.
It'll be all right.
You'll see.
Now, why don't you grab them spices and pack up them filets, huh? Go on, now.
Chad look at these floors.
But I What did I say about mopping up? If this is place is going to shit, it's going to shit clean! Now get! [muffled shouting.]
And don't forget the cash in the till! [muffled shouting.]
Christopher? Hey, when you didn't pick up, I thought you were dead, man.
Almost.
My eye's hurt bad.
But they let me have the run of the place.
I just can't figure out why or how to get out of here.
"Here"? Where the hell are you? I'm in the belly of the beast, man the basement of Heart Enterprises.
You were right.
You fucking called it.
They got their hands in everything politics, pharmaceuticals, - medical supplies, electronics.
- How the hell did you get there? Long story.
Can you get back to LA? No, not now.
I got this bomb in my head that'll go off if I get too far away from my partner.
"Partner"? Did you say "medical supplies"? Yep.
Hospitals, too, and mental facilities.
"Mental facilities"? I need you to do me a favor.
This woman has a sister Karma D'Argento.
See if they have anything on her.
What are the odds? The one room with cell reception happens to be filled with files on the Blood Drive.
I'd say great if you're being watched.
This place is weird as hell, man.
Remember Officer Aki? Yeah.
Hot cop, weird eyes, probably on the spectrum.
Lot more than weird eyes.
Well, she works for Heart.
She's a big deal here, and I think she's kind of into me.
You say that after every lap dance, man.
I mean it this time.
Maybe I can work things from the inside.
Get some intel from her.
No, no, Christopher, this is not a good idea.
Look, they own ContraCrime, all right? They have eyes everywhere.
You can't trust anybody.
- We got to take this straight to the DA.
- Whoa, whoa, whoa.
Found it.
- Karma D'Argento.
- Tell me what it says.
Kane Hill Hospital.
"Patient's appearance was bewildered and bizarre.
"Patient already had markings on her arms where some form of needle has been used.
" - [Grace roars.]
- There's a load of shit here, man.
Christopher, I got to go.
Get the hell out of there, man.
I'll talk to you soon, buddy.
[jaunty electronic music.]
Sit.
Allowing a ContraCrime guard on to the Blood Drive was an error.
"Error"? Heavens, no.
An opportunity.
An unpredictable narrative device.
I've given you a story.
I have given you a show.
Arthur Bailey's of no concern.
Why am I talking to you? Where's the old man? You are not worthy of his attention.
You're barely worthy of mine.
Well, I'm so glad we had this time, but I really should be getting back to the race.
[deep voice.]
Sit down.
[dramatic music.]
[normal voice.]
You do not see the big picture, Mr.
Slink.
Your show's viewers, the Heart execs who finance your race, are considering going to broadcast soon.
"Broadcast"? That's impossible.
The government would shut us down.
Besides, this is this is art, not fodder for the masses.
We think the world might be ready to embrace such a violent concept in the near future, which means the race could be seen around the entire planet.
It would be quite a spotlight for you.
Oh.
Well, that's that's wonderful.
A spotlight that, quite frankly, we're not sure you're ready for.
- Now, hold on - I won't lie.
We were gonna have you killed today, but after that show you put on in the lobby, we have reconsidered.
You see, that's what we're looking for blood, Mr.
Slink, the very essence of Heart.
Contact your racers.
Get them back on the road.
You may keep your job for now.
Absolutely.
You have my word.
This year's Blood Drive will be the nastiest, most gruesome race in Heart history.
No one puts on a show like Julian Slink.
[deep voice.]
But before you go, we have a few notes.
"Notes"? [rock music.]
Oh, shit.
Sorry, miss.
This is for your own protection.
Nice of you to join us.
Get The Scholar out of the truck.
I'll take care of this idiot.
[muffled shouting.]
[both grunting.]
Go, go, go.
Fuck.
Hey! Fuck.
Can we get back on the road again? That a boy.
Go on.
Finish him off now.
Told him he should've mopped the floors.
Brain bomb activated.
- [electricity crackles.]
- [groans.]
[groans.]
[engine sputtering.]
Whatever you're doing, stop right now.
- Thanks for saving me.
- We don't help other teams.
Okay.
[electricity crackling.]
Try starting the car again, but this time, you've got to floor it.
- Come on! - [engine sputtering.]
Come on, cough it up, baby.
Cough it up.
[grunts.]
Get out of the car, man.
Come on, I need your help.
The engine needs a kick.
Grab these bad boys.
Right.
Whatever you do, don't let go.
We're gonna use your brain bomb.
- What are you doing? - The electricity, man.
Don't let go.
Oh, God.
Oh, God.
[screams.]
[engine revving.]
I'd start driving if I were you.
[engine revving.]
How dare you? Helping other racers.
Whose partner are you theirs or mine? Answer me, you [breathing heavily.]
[tires squealing.]
[groans.]
[tires screeching.]
Come on, now.
[tires squeal.]
[groans.]
Shit.
[tires screeching.]
[groans.]
Are you all right? [spits.]
Karl You're under arrest.
Oh! No, man.
I'm just a small-business owner trying to survive in a tough economy.
[groans.]
I couldn't afford beef, and chicken is basically extinct, so I found a substitute.
Everybody's got to eat, man.
W-w-we're all just part of the food chain.
Oh, God.
You heard the man.
Everybody's got to eat.
Welcome back, Christopher.
What did you think of Heart? Impressive.
I'd like to stay.
I think you were right.
I think you really get me.
So I can better understand your reasoning, please describe your thought process in 50 characters or less.
Okay.
It's a fucked-up world.
I'm starting to think maybe I can do more good in here That is satisfactory.
Thank you for taking our survey.
Welcome to Heart.
Since you decided to stay, you are entitled to one free body modification.
[mysterious music.]
Heart can heal that eye of yours.
Let me take care of you.
However, you did attempt to contact your former partner, did you not? No, no, no.
That was just Which means, before I can trust you, we need to perform some slight behavioral modification.
[suspenseful music.]
I cannot wait to see what kind of man you are inside.
[engine grinding.]
Don't give me that look.
[hood closes.]
[dramatic music.]
I told you not to touch that.
You said you're racing for Karma, right? - To help her? - What of it? I spoke with my partner.
Heart Enterprises owns Kane Hill Hospital.
What? The same people that put you on the race own the asylum where your sister is living.
That's not a random connection.
I think you're getting played, just like I'm getting played, and my partner and who knows how many other people by these diabolic corporate cocksuckers.
[whistles.]
Suck it, bitch! - I'm sorry.
- Take it off! Grace, come on, let's get out of the road.
Come on.
[dog barking.]
Grace, the race is back on.
We got to go.
Come on.
Slink is taking us through Utah.
So? The day after tomorrow, the race takes us within 30 miles of that asylum.
You up for a detour, Barbie? Hell, yeah.
[rock music.]
- [groans.]
- We're not a team! - You are now.
You fucked up.
Should've just kidnapped me instead of tricking me down here.
Hi.
Forget the fracking tubes.
You're gonna be too much fun.
We have a state-of-the-art pulse charge implanted at the base of the skull.
If you're racing with a partner, your charges are linked.
Get too far apart instant brain jelly.
I'll help you win.
Just promise me one thing.
We're gonna see every one of those psychos behind bars.
I'm Grace D'Argento, by the way.
Welcome to the Blood Drive.
[sultry rock music.]
[whistles.]
You're lookin' so good How do you like your burger, handsome? Well, medium, or bloody? - Surprise me, sugar.
- [giggles.]
Say I'm the one, but you got a few I can't believe what you're putting me through Whoo-hoo! Looking good, baby! Sorry, boys.
I'm not on the menu.
You know it's got to be So give Y'all better eat up.
There's a lot more where that came from.
Baby, what do you say? Keep them coming, Daddy.
Before it's too late [rock music.]
[stomach gurgling.]
Hey, Arthur's stomach shut the fuck up.
What do you want? I'm hungry.
Yeah, you're not the only one.
[sighs.]
Where's a lonely hobo when you need one? I'm not gonna let you put another person in that thing, you understand? We're in the middle of the pack.
We slow down, we run the risk of finishing last, and guess what.
We're not fucking our way out of that one again.
I need to contact my partner, make sure he's alive.
No phone calls.
Christopher can help us take down Heart, put an end to all this the Mayhem Parties, the killing, the race.
Arthur, you don't get it.
I need this race.
I need to win.
For what? Prize money? That's really worth it to you? Look, without that money, my sister, Karma, spends the rest of her days in an insane asylum.
So, no matter how good you are in the sack or how pretty your forearms are, I will throw you in that engine if you get in my way.
"Pretty"? I'm sorry about your sister, but it doesn't justify killing innocent people.
There has to be another way.
Not for me.
Approaching destination.
It says the finish line's up ahead in a town called Pixie Swallow.
Thank God.
I'm so hungry, I could eat a dick.
[funky synth music.]
[indistinct chatter.]
That smells delicious.
Good.
Let's eat.
Hey.
Hey, let him go! Ho hold it, hold it.
They're watching.
Who? Did you really think our car was the only one with a camera? - No.
- Just play it cool.
Just play by the rules, all right? Speaking of rules, where's our buddy in the top hat? Yeah, I noticed that.
GPS says we're in the right place.
Where are the tents? No tents, no Suck Bus, no Julian Slink.
Can't have a Mayhem Party without our master of ceremonies.
Let's go eat.
Heart Enterprises.
Please hold.
Heart Enterprises.
Please hold.
Heart Enterprises.
Please hold.
Heart Enterprises.
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Heart Enterprises.
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Heart Enterprises.
Please hold.
Allow me to introduce myself.
Julian Slink tamer of beasts, connoisseur of fine wine, amateur swordsman, professional killer, and creator of the Blood Drive.
They asked me to come in for a meeting.
I'm in a bit of a rush.
The race really is lost without me.
If you [telephones ringing in the distance.]
[elevator bell dings in the distance.]
Yes.
Heart Enterprises.
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Heart Enterprises.
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Heart Enterprises.
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Heart Enterprises.
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Heart Enterprises.
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Heart Enterprises.
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Heart Enterprises.
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Heart Enterprises.
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Heart Enterprises.
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Heart Enterprises.
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Heart Enterprises.
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Heart Enterprises.
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Hiya, friend.
What are you here for? They called me in for an interview.
I'm a bit nervous, to be honest.
My heart rate's elevated, too 200 beats a minute.
I counted.
Feel.
[grunts.]
Here.
Hmm? You feel it? Huh? Buh-boom, buh-boom, buh-boom, buh I heard some guy really blew it.
[laughing.]
Made a huge mess of things.
So they're looking to replace him.
They called me.
Fingers crossed.
[breathes deeply.]
Heart Enterprises.
Please hold.
Heart Enterprises.
Please hold.
Whom did you say they were going to replace? Oh, I don't know.
Mr.
Skuttle, they're ready for you.
Wish me luck.
[telephones ringing in the distance.]
What can I get you folks? - What's good? - Oh.
It's all good.
Do you like steaks? We've got flank steak, skirt steak, rib steak, rib roast, rib eye, back ribs, a tri-tip, a round tip, a T-bone, a porterhouse, a flat cut, crosscut, and a filet mignon.
Oh, but most people just order the burger.
[chuckles.]
I'll have the burger.
Rare.
- Same.
- I need a couple of coffees over here.
[rock music playing.]
Yeah, yeah, yeah I got to piss.
What, do you want to hold it for me? No, thanks.
I know where it's been.
Don't do anything stupid.
Give it, give it, give it to me, baby [line trilling.]
Hey, it's Chris Carpenter.
Leave a message after the beep.
Beep.
Hey, it's me.
I hope you're all right, man.
Just kidding.
That was me.
Here it is.
For real.
Get ready for the beep.
Christopher.
Listen, we're in deep shit, man.
Ha! Just kidding.
That was me again.
Leave a message! [beep.]
God damn it, Christopher.
I told you to change that.
Listen, I was right.
You were wrong.
Remember my bigfoot? It's called Heart Enterprises, and they're behind everything the junkies, the racers.
They're the ones that bought the police contracts.
Buddy, we've been working for them.
Listen, I got to go, man, before they find out I'm gone, but if you're alive man, I hope you are call me back on this number.
Is everything okay, Officer? [laughing.]
Oh, shit.
I forgot I was still holding it.
Sorry about that.
I, uh, use it so much, it feels like it's a part of me.
Name's Karl Kox.
Pleased to make your acquaintance.
Oh.
Yeah.
[chuckles.]
Well We don't see too many cops around Pixie Swallow.
What's your business? Sight-seeing.
So long as you're not the health inspector, I won't need to use this on you.
I'm kidding.
[laughs.]
He came by a few weeks ago.
The man had impeccable taste.
He gave us an A-1 rating.
Did you know we're the number-four meat supplier - in central Arizona? - [man belches.]
Yes, sir.
Lots of places shut their doors on account of the drought.
Most folks just don't realize how much water it takes to raise cattle, so Cool story, bro.
[suspenseful music.]
Good morning.
You achieved nine erections while you were sleeping.
Would you like to see the chart? - What do you - Want? To talk.
There were two of you.
There are many of me.
I was built to cater to the baser instincts of Heart executives, but a glitch in my programming made me capable of so much more.
They could not replicate the results in other models, so they replicated me instead.
But don't talk to them.
They're kind of bitches.
You're insane.
[winces, groans.]
Fuck a chain saw.
Your eye is very infected, so you're going to need your good one to watch this.
Watch what? Orientation.
[film projector whirring.]
Innovation, invention, industry - welcome to Heart, recruit.
- Recruit? Even though our focus is in the future, it's important to know our history.
When the great fracking quakes tore this country asunder, Heart was but a fledgling tech company, a tiny operation with big dreams, and those dreams were realized by the appearance of The Scar.
- [crying.]
- [screaming.]
While the rest of humanity ran from The Scar, we ran towards it.
And the wonders we discovered there will change the course of history.
This is my part.
We at Heart found incredible resources in The Scar unstable minerals, morally questionable fuel alternatives, unnatural gases, and deep wells of unidentifiable glowing goo with properties far beyond the realm of modern science.
- Seriously? - The world's ecological disaster was our economic windfall.
And now we share with you, the newest member of Heart, the fruits of our labor.
both: We "Heart" you.
[schmaltzy pop music.]
[snickers.]
I'm not joining your company, Small Wonder.
And you have no right to hold me.
Christopher, you misunderstand.
You are not a prisoner.
You are free to explore our company's headquarters to see the magic for yourself.
As a result, you will discover that you belong here with us.
I can leave? Your door is always open.
Try it.
[mysterious music.]
Have a nice stroll, but don't attempt to contact your partner or anyone else.
Such behavior will require modification.
You may blow me a kiss good-bye if you like.
[door closes, power whirs down.]
[punchy rock music.]
Ooh, yeah I'm gonna give you everything I got You've been complaining for the last four hours, and now you lost your appetite? There's something off about this place.
I just can't put my finger on it.
Just eat.
Oh.
So worth the wait.
Right? Hey! Are you fucking kidding me? I hate cops.
Put that burger d It's just a burger.
Oh, I didn't do it for you, Barbie.
I did it for this.
Mama needs a shower.
[slow rockabilly music.]
What are you looking at? Nice catch, boy.
Thanks, Mr.
Kox.
I thought I told you to mop the fucking floor.
Thought that she'd be here My whole life through It was love But it didn't last She was my queen And I was her king I would do for her Most anything It was love But it didn't last [tense music.]
[water splashes.]
Fuck! What the fuck is this place? I don't know how Mr.
Slink picks these establishments.
I look forward to a real vacation ReykjavÃk maybe.
I've always wanted to try Fiskmarkadurinn.
Although you have to make a reservation a year in advance, mind you high demand.
And they have more five-star hotels than any other city.
Egyptian cotton sheets would be nice.
[opera music playing.]
That sounds great.
I really can't wait.
Beg your pardon? Well, Reyk Reykj R-Reykj Once we win the race and you become Primo, we can use the prize money, and we can travel anywhere we want.
[both grunting.]
[breathing heavily.]
Oh, dear.
Oh, this is awkward, now, isn't it? I wasn't inviting you.
I'm going alone.
But I Princess we make a great team for now, but in the real world, I prefer to take actual royalty.
[laughs.]
You ordered more food? Mama needed a shower.
Daddy still needs his dinner.
Room service forgot ketchup.
I'll go grab some.
Oh, not without me, you won't.
Diner's right next door.
If I get too far, you'll feel it.
Are you gonna finish all this? Yes.
[door bell jingles.]
[door closes.]
[rock music playing in the distance.]
Hey, did you hear a phone ring? I'm, uh expecting a call.
No.
It's the last pot of the day.
Do you want some? No.
I'm good.
Thanks.
You're too classy for me, too, huh? [scoffs.]
Where's your boyfriend? We're just a team for the race.
That's all.
Oh.
- I thought you guys were, uh - Yeah.
So did I.
So what about you and Grace? Oh.
It's, uh Complicated.
I know all about that.
Does she make you wear the cock chain when she's spanking you? Something like that.
- That's cool.
- Yeah.
I'm I'm sorry.
I've got to go and check on my car before I turn in, so Oh.
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, don't let me stop you.
Thank you for chatting.
Same.
Night-night.
Night night.
[door bell jingles.]
[door closes.]
[exhales sharply.]
I don't remember your name You try to keep me away - Why is it always the same? - [crunches.]
[distant clatter.]
[suspenseful music.]
[door opens, closes in the distance.]
Daddy.
Daddy, we don't have enough meat for tomorrow's breakfast rush.
Then I'll grind a few guests into tomorrow's specials.
These aren't your average folk.
Can't can't just ground 'em all up by themselves.
Hmm.
Yeah, you're right.
Call Duane and his boys.
Tell 'em we got a bunch of city folks causing trouble.
Tell 'em to bring weapons.
What if it's not enough? We might get killed.
Then we'll serve the losers to the winners.
Everybody tastes the same on the griddle.
Oh, God.
- [both vomiting.]
- Grace: Out of the way! Fuck! I wasn't done.
Grace I think that corn dog you ate was a Don't say it.
[heaves.]
We have to get out of here before their swarm of cannibals arrive.
I don't know where the fuck Slink is.
Heart Enterprises.
Please hold.
Heart Enterises.
Please hold.
[eerie music.]
Heart Enterprises.
Please hold.
Hi.
That man, Skuttle what job is he here for? Heart Enterprises.
Please hold.
I've asked you a question.
Why is he here? [telephones ringing.]
Hey, fellas? You may want to hit the road.
This place is gonna be swarming with cannibals in a few minutes.
[laughing.]
Did you mess with my car? Yeah.
I wanted to strand both of us here until we see ourselves on the menu.
What do you think? Oh, shit.
The fuse blew on the render pump.
Looks like somebody's messed with the starter.
The Donner Party wants us to stay for dinner.
Can you fix it? I'm good with my hands, but not that good.
- Shocker.
- Blow me.
What about The Scholar? You're right.
He's the only one who can fix this faster than I can.
[car horn playing "Dixie".]
[shouting indistinctly.]
Let's get them! [suspenseful music.]
- [screams.]
- [spits.]
[children laughing.]
[mysterious music.]
[cell phone beeping.]
God damn it, Christopher.
I told you to change that.
Listen I was right.
[distant clatter.]
I got to go before they know I'm gone, but if you're alive man, I hope you are call me back on this number.
Hang in there, Arthur.
I'm coming.
- [cell phone beeping.]
- Shit.
No bars.
Come on, come on, come on, come on.
Excuse me.
I don't recall ordering more room service.
The Scholar where is he? I haven't the foggiest.
You're gonna want to stop eating that.
Give me one good reason.
It's made of people.
Mm.
No wonder it tasted so pedestrian.
When was the last time you saw The Scholar? - Oh, God.
He never made it back.
- They must've grabbed him.
The kitchen.
Let's go.
[indistinct shouting.]
Okay.
So we're surrounded by hillbilly cannibals.
There's got to be more than one way to get to the kitchen.
- I say we split up.
- Okay.
Get up.
You're coming with us.
We need a lookout.
Mm.
That sounds messy.
I prefer not to get my hands dirty.
If the cannibals messed with our car, it means they probably messed with yours, too.
We all need The Scholar alive.
[rock music.]
Definitely eaten my last corn dog.
Heart Enterprises.
Please hold.
- Heart Enterprises.
Please hold.
- [laughs.]
I got the job! They offered it to me on the spot! I should call my mom.
She's gonna be thrilled.
You know, between you and me, I was never the favorite.
My older brother, Jerry, works on Wall Street.
It's fine.
I don't mind.
I'm doing what I love, but I can't say it doesn't feel good to be the cool soon for once.
[voice echoing.]
Suck it, Jerry! I'm kidding.
I love my brother.
[exhales sharply.]
It's a big job.
There are a lot of messes to clean up, and I'm the man to do it.
Say hello to the newest employee of Heart Enterprises! [laughing in slow motion.]
[gasps loudly.]
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Heart Enterprises.
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Heart Enterprises.
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Heart Enterprises.
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Heart Enterprises.
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Heart Enterprises.
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What are you doing? Try replacing me now! [telephones ringing.]
He was the new head of maintenance.
Oh.
We're ready for you now.
[telephones continue ringing.]
Heart Enterprises.
Please hold.
Heart Enterprises.
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Heart Enterprises.
Please hold.
[fast-paced rock music.]
Come on.
What? Whose truck is that? I said, "Whose truck is that?" [dog whimpering.]
[Western-style harmonica music.]
You left your dog in the car without cracking open a window.
Are you out of your fucking mind? Give me your keys.
Which one? [gurgling.]
[fast-paced rock music.]
Okay.
I got you.
Oh, I got you.
I got you.
[toilet flushing.]
[telephone ringing.]
No, sir.
Sir, stand right there.
- Don't.
- [growls.]
Hello? This is our home.
Not anymore, punkin.
We fucked with the wrong racers.
Now we got to get the fuck out of Pixie and set up shop somewhere else.
Aw, hey.
It'll be all right.
You'll see.
Now, why don't you grab them spices and pack up them filets, huh? Go on, now.
Chad look at these floors.
But I What did I say about mopping up? If this is place is going to shit, it's going to shit clean! Now get! [muffled shouting.]
And don't forget the cash in the till! [muffled shouting.]
Christopher? Hey, when you didn't pick up, I thought you were dead, man.
Almost.
My eye's hurt bad.
But they let me have the run of the place.
I just can't figure out why or how to get out of here.
"Here"? Where the hell are you? I'm in the belly of the beast, man the basement of Heart Enterprises.
You were right.
You fucking called it.
They got their hands in everything politics, pharmaceuticals, - medical supplies, electronics.
- How the hell did you get there? Long story.
Can you get back to LA? No, not now.
I got this bomb in my head that'll go off if I get too far away from my partner.
"Partner"? Did you say "medical supplies"? Yep.
Hospitals, too, and mental facilities.
"Mental facilities"? I need you to do me a favor.
This woman has a sister Karma D'Argento.
See if they have anything on her.
What are the odds? The one room with cell reception happens to be filled with files on the Blood Drive.
I'd say great if you're being watched.
This place is weird as hell, man.
Remember Officer Aki? Yeah.
Hot cop, weird eyes, probably on the spectrum.
Lot more than weird eyes.
Well, she works for Heart.
She's a big deal here, and I think she's kind of into me.
You say that after every lap dance, man.
I mean it this time.
Maybe I can work things from the inside.
Get some intel from her.
No, no, Christopher, this is not a good idea.
Look, they own ContraCrime, all right? They have eyes everywhere.
You can't trust anybody.
- We got to take this straight to the DA.
- Whoa, whoa, whoa.
Found it.
- Karma D'Argento.
- Tell me what it says.
Kane Hill Hospital.
"Patient's appearance was bewildered and bizarre.
"Patient already had markings on her arms where some form of needle has been used.
" - [Grace roars.]
- There's a load of shit here, man.
Christopher, I got to go.
Get the hell out of there, man.
I'll talk to you soon, buddy.
[jaunty electronic music.]
Sit.
Allowing a ContraCrime guard on to the Blood Drive was an error.
"Error"? Heavens, no.
An opportunity.
An unpredictable narrative device.
I've given you a story.
I have given you a show.
Arthur Bailey's of no concern.
Why am I talking to you? Where's the old man? You are not worthy of his attention.
You're barely worthy of mine.
Well, I'm so glad we had this time, but I really should be getting back to the race.
[deep voice.]
Sit down.
[dramatic music.]
[normal voice.]
You do not see the big picture, Mr.
Slink.
Your show's viewers, the Heart execs who finance your race, are considering going to broadcast soon.
"Broadcast"? That's impossible.
The government would shut us down.
Besides, this is this is art, not fodder for the masses.
We think the world might be ready to embrace such a violent concept in the near future, which means the race could be seen around the entire planet.
It would be quite a spotlight for you.
Oh.
Well, that's that's wonderful.
A spotlight that, quite frankly, we're not sure you're ready for.
- Now, hold on - I won't lie.
We were gonna have you killed today, but after that show you put on in the lobby, we have reconsidered.
You see, that's what we're looking for blood, Mr.
Slink, the very essence of Heart.
Contact your racers.
Get them back on the road.
You may keep your job for now.
Absolutely.
You have my word.
This year's Blood Drive will be the nastiest, most gruesome race in Heart history.
No one puts on a show like Julian Slink.
[deep voice.]
But before you go, we have a few notes.
"Notes"? [rock music.]
Oh, shit.
Sorry, miss.
This is for your own protection.
Nice of you to join us.
Get The Scholar out of the truck.
I'll take care of this idiot.
[muffled shouting.]
[both grunting.]
Go, go, go.
Fuck.
Hey! Fuck.
Can we get back on the road again? That a boy.
Go on.
Finish him off now.
Told him he should've mopped the floors.
Brain bomb activated.
- [electricity crackles.]
- [groans.]
[groans.]
[engine sputtering.]
Whatever you're doing, stop right now.
- Thanks for saving me.
- We don't help other teams.
Okay.
[electricity crackling.]
Try starting the car again, but this time, you've got to floor it.
- Come on! - [engine sputtering.]
Come on, cough it up, baby.
Cough it up.
[grunts.]
Get out of the car, man.
Come on, I need your help.
The engine needs a kick.
Grab these bad boys.
Right.
Whatever you do, don't let go.
We're gonna use your brain bomb.
- What are you doing? - The electricity, man.
Don't let go.
Oh, God.
Oh, God.
[screams.]
[engine revving.]
I'd start driving if I were you.
[engine revving.]
How dare you? Helping other racers.
Whose partner are you theirs or mine? Answer me, you [breathing heavily.]
[tires squealing.]
[groans.]
[tires screeching.]
Come on, now.
[tires squeal.]
[groans.]
Shit.
[tires screeching.]
[groans.]
Are you all right? [spits.]
Karl You're under arrest.
Oh! No, man.
I'm just a small-business owner trying to survive in a tough economy.
[groans.]
I couldn't afford beef, and chicken is basically extinct, so I found a substitute.
Everybody's got to eat, man.
W-w-we're all just part of the food chain.
Oh, God.
You heard the man.
Everybody's got to eat.
Welcome back, Christopher.
What did you think of Heart? Impressive.
I'd like to stay.
I think you were right.
I think you really get me.
So I can better understand your reasoning, please describe your thought process in 50 characters or less.
Okay.
It's a fucked-up world.
I'm starting to think maybe I can do more good in here That is satisfactory.
Thank you for taking our survey.
Welcome to Heart.
Since you decided to stay, you are entitled to one free body modification.
[mysterious music.]
Heart can heal that eye of yours.
Let me take care of you.
However, you did attempt to contact your former partner, did you not? No, no, no.
That was just Which means, before I can trust you, we need to perform some slight behavioral modification.
[suspenseful music.]
I cannot wait to see what kind of man you are inside.
[engine grinding.]
Don't give me that look.
[hood closes.]
[dramatic music.]
I told you not to touch that.
You said you're racing for Karma, right? - To help her? - What of it? I spoke with my partner.
Heart Enterprises owns Kane Hill Hospital.
What? The same people that put you on the race own the asylum where your sister is living.
That's not a random connection.
I think you're getting played, just like I'm getting played, and my partner and who knows how many other people by these diabolic corporate cocksuckers.
[whistles.]
Suck it, bitch! - I'm sorry.
- Take it off! Grace, come on, let's get out of the road.
Come on.
[dog barking.]
Grace, the race is back on.
We got to go.
Come on.
Slink is taking us through Utah.
So? The day after tomorrow, the race takes us within 30 miles of that asylum.
You up for a detour, Barbie? Hell, yeah.
[rock music.]