Chuck s02e22 Episode Script

Chuck Versus the Ring (1)

CHUCK: Here's a few things you might need to know.
STEPHEN: I programmed it to remove the Intersect from Chuck's head.
It's over, Chuck.
The Intersect is out.
-You're a spy, Chuck? Awesome.
-Yeah, more or less.
Yeah.
-Do you have a dream? -I'd like to be a Benihana chef.
-Morgan out.
MAN: You're free, Morgan.
Chuck, where have you been? -I was getting your wedding present.
-Dad.
-Where you headed? -Burbank.
Got a wedding to go to.
-Thank you for joining us.
-Emmett, I've waited for this day.
Thought of ways I could say it and how it'd feel to get it off of my chest.
Let me stop you, Chuck.
I am incredibly flattered but I am a flaming heterosexual.
[EMMETT CHUCKLES] What? What? No.
I'm-- I'm-- I'm out of here.
-I'm-- I'm done.
-Wha--? Leaving is not the answer.
I am just touched that you are taking it so hard.
Emmett, you don't understand.
I quit.
No more Buy More.
No more you.
You can take your flag and your job and shove it.
Ditto.
EMMETT: What do you think you're going to do for the rest of your life? Anything I want.
Chuck, what are your plans for the future? I was gonna get a good champagne buzz going on at my sister's wedding followed by a nice extra-long slow dance with my date.
Vocationally speaking? Oh, that? No, nothing.
Nothing lined up just yet.
How would you feel about working on the Intersect project? Government has been rebuilding its own Intersect.
You've shown real promise.
We'd like you to be an analyst.
Your country is calling you, Mr.
Bartowski.
I think my country might have the wrong number because I'm just Chuck Bartowski.
Not a hero.
Very well.
I guess that concludes Project Bartowski.
[SIGHS] Colonel Casey, please issue Mr.
Bartowski his final papers before you and your Special Forces team ship out for Waziristan.
Agent Walker, I'll need you for just a moment more.
-What exactly is this? -It's your pay packet, numbnuts.
Hi-oh! Whoa! If you were a true patriot, you wouldn't cash it.
-Casey.
-Hm.
Thank you for saving my life at least once a week.
See? Guys can hug.
-Not if they don't have their man parts.
-That's a good point.
You done good work here.
Thank you.
In case of emergencies.
My personal number.
But your fingers better be on fire when you're dialing.
Agent Walker, I'm sure you'll be pleased to know you're in charge of the new project working in tandem with Agent Larkin.
-This time, the Intersect goes in my head.
SARAH: Bryce.
Now that we've got the Cube, it's ready for upload.
You leave for Zurich together at 0800.
[SPEAKS GERMAN] Walker and Larkin.
Together again.
Finally.
We can get out of here.
-Hey.
-Hey.
Everything is gonna be perfect.
I even had your Toyota washed, man.
Oh, perfect.
Thanks, bro.
-Oh, I'll be right back.
-Okay.
HONEY: Just a second.
-Can I talk to my sister? It will only take-- -No.
It's bad luck to see the bride.
ELLIE: It's fine.
I don't believe in that stuff.
All right, just get in.
-Get in.
Get in.
-Sorry.
Hi.
What? Look at you.
Ellie, your dreams are coming true.
If it were up to me, I would have a small ceremony on the beach.
Sand between my toes, people I love.
But we all make sacrifices for family, right? HONEY: One, two, three.
Where the hell is my blond? Anyway, I don't know exactly yet what I'm gonna get you for your present.
But I'll start with this.
I quit the Buy More today.
What? The Buy More is no more.
Oh, Chuck, that is-- That is incredible.
-What are you going to do with your future? -I don't know.
HONEY: There she is.
I made my dreams come true, Chuck.
What are you gonna do about yours? CHUCK: Sarah, can we talk for a moment? Look, I wanted to tal-- Ellie wanted to make sure you have the rings.
Yeah.
Right.
You look like a real spy.
You look like a real bridesmaid.
-Sarah, I-- -Wait-- -There is something I have to tell you-- -I can't wait.
I can't.
I can't wait any longer.
Okay? Everyone keeps asking me what I'm gonna do and the truth is, I don't have a clue.
All I do know is that I want you to be in it.
-Please, I really have to tell you-- -No.
No guns.
No lies.
Just us.
Just like I've always wanted.
I've recently come into a bit of money, so any place you want to go any place at all as long as it's sunny with little umbrella drinks.
What I'm getting at here is Sarah Walker, will you do me the honor of taking a vacation with me? Chuck, I'm leaving in the morning.
The details are classified but I'm working on the new Intersect project with Bryce.
Bryce.
I'm so sorry.
I wanted to wait until after the ceremony to tell you.
Thank you for coming to the wedding.
Good for the cover.
Today's a day we'll remember forever, son.
Oh, my God.
I believe we've met before.
-Ted Roark.
-No, I'm Ted Roark.
You're the CIA agent who's in deep trouble.
By the way, congratulations on your sister's happy day.
Her gown is gorgeous.
Full bodice, love the beading.
What the hell do you want? There's no need to curse.
You know damn well what I want.
I ca-- I want the Intersect Cube.
I can't-- I can't-- I can't give you that.
Oh, you'll find a way, I'm sure.
Oh, sorry.
I forgot the threat part.
If you don't deliver within a half hour, I'm going to kill the bride.
Nice.
Chuck.
Can I talk to you real quick? -I'm feeling nervous.
-I'm sorry, I can't talk now.
Hey, hey, hey.
What's the matter? You can tell me.
I might be able to help.
It's-- It's-- It's-- It's the rings.
It's the rings.
I have to go home and get them.
Find Sarah, pull her aside, and specifically tell her that I forgot the rings.
The wedding is in 20 minutes.
-Thanks for that.
-Unless I stall the wedding.
No one will know you're gone.
They'll blame me.
It'll be fine.
-You'd do that for me? -Of course I would.
Saved my ass a million times.
It's time I saved yours.
-But-- But go.
-Okay.
What is that smell? -There he is! There he is.
SOLDIER: Colonel.
Ladies.
You get soft without me? -It's good to see you.
-Long time, Miles.
-Come on, Casey.
RECORDING: This is Casey.
Leave a message.
-Who's ready to do some hunting? SOLDIERS: Hooyah! Hooyah! [BEEPING] -Dr.
Awesome.
-Don't take another step.
My wife warned me about you.
Good warnings, I hope.
Retreat.
Two steps back.
-I need to get in there.
-You-- Oh, Dr.
Woodcomb your wife wants you to go to the car and get backup hosiery.
-Does that make sense? -Man my post.
-Don't let this one in.
-Yes, sir.
Sarah, listen to me.
Chuck forgot the rings.
So he-- He went home to go get them.
-He what? -The rings.
He blew it.
I have to stall the wedding.
-How do I stall a wedding? -Do it, Morgan.
By any means necessary.
How do I stall this wedding? Think, man, think.
[BEEPING] BRYCE: It's gone.
-Bryce? -The new Intersect.
Where? Where is it? Chuck, I can't tell you that.
That's top-secret.
Not even Beck-- No, I need it.
My family is in danger.
Ted Roark and his team are at the wedding.
He's going to kill Ellie unless I bring him the Cube.
-Roark can't have it.
-No.
He'll murder everyone.
No.
You're gonna give them me.
-They think you're the Intersect.
-They've been looking for me all along.
The Cube can't fall into the wrong hands.
I made a promise to Orion.
-You know.
-That was the deal.
Your dad knew I protected you at Stanford.
I was the only spy he would trust.
I can't believe you've known.
He wanted to keep you out of this.
I knew you could handle the Intersect.
I knew Sarah would find you.
Most importantly, you deserve to know the truth about your father.
He's a hero.
Now, let's go get your sister married.
-What's the holdup? -The bride is perfect.
She'll only wilt from here.
-We can't find Chuck.
-And the blond is gone too.
-Sarah? -Yeah.
-Just now? -Yes.
Excuse me.
This is a really weird family.
Don't chew gum.
Sarah.
Something's wrong.
Ted Roark and his men are inside.
He's alive? -How did--? Did you bring a gun? -I'll think of something.
Check the chapel, the chamber, make sure there's nobody else.
No, wait.
[BEEPING] Use the southeast entrance.
Through the kitchen.
Okay.
Thanks.
Hello? Is this on? Hello.
I'm Morgan Grimes.
Unofficial member of the wedding party.
So-- Oh, we have some pre-wedding entertainment planned for you guys.
So without further ado, I present to you, Jeffster.
It's Jeffster.
-What's going on? -I don't know but this wedding got good.
-Dude, we got the perfect song.
-Knock them dead.
This is in four-four time.
It's in D.
Watch me for the changes.
[SINGING "MR.
ROBOTO"] Morgan, you are ruining my wedding.
If you hit me, know it only teaches me to hit.
For reasons I cannot say, I have to stall this wedding.
Tell me why.
[SINGING "MR.
ROBOTO"] Because Chuck is in trouble and I'm saving him, man.
Chuck told you to do this? Yes.
Okay.
Okay.
I'm with you.
Okay.
No Sarah.
That is not the "Wedding March.
" Can one of you go see what's going on out there? Now! Thank you, thank you.
Focus on the calm.
Son why are you letting Sam Kinison and an Indian lesbian wreck your wedding? Dad, just chill out.
Okay? You know what I'm feeling a bit peckish.
Don't you dare! Chuck.
If you want to see the Intersect again you will not touch anything in this room.
Do I make myself clear? Today is my sister's wedding day and, believe me, you don't want to see her angry.
Where's the Intersect, Chuck? A-- About that.
-Kill him.
-Ho! Ho! Ho! Hoedown.
Hoedown.
Hold on.
Hold on a second, all right? SARAH: Finally.
I did bring an Intersect with me.
An Intersect? BRYCE: Mr.
Roark.
Mr.
Larkin.
The Human Intersect.
BRYCE: Roark.
You and me.
You gotta let Chuck and his people go.
We leave.
They stay.
Nobody else needs to know.
Terrific plan.
Thing of it is, Fulcrum wants Chuck here dead no matter what.
So with that said, shoot Mr.
Bartowski here.
Sarah, take him.
[GUNFIRE] CHUCK: Oh, God, not the flowers.
CHUCK: Oh, God, not the centerpieces.
-I'm dry.
Any more knives? -Nope.
I threw all eight.
MAN: Get up.
Oh, God, someone just shoot me now.
I can help you with that, Chuck.
A real shotgun wedding.
Just think, that terrible pun is the last thing you'll ever hear.
[SINGING "MR.
ROBOTO"] Hello, Ted.
Waited 20 years to do that.
SOLDIER: All clear, sir.
You rang.
Chuck what happened? Everything's all right.
There was a minor problem.
[FIRE ALARM RINGING] Oh, no.
[PEOPLE SHOUTING] Wedding canceled.
This is officially a disaster.
I can't believe that my spy life has wrecked my real life.
Again.
I've completely ruined my sister's wedding day.
I'm sorry, son, I-- If anyone knows how you feel, it's me.
You had no choice, Charles.
You saved her life.
[KNOCKING] -Hey.
-Hey.
You okay? No, I'm not.
I'm not okay.
I don't wanna have to save my sister using a Special Forces Team.
I just want to be a normal guy who helps his sister in normal ways.
Like right now, if I could give her anything in the world I would-- I think I might know how to fix this.
You got time for one more mission before you take off? It's not what a normal guy would do.
[BEEPING] Don't forget to lock it.
[PHONE RINGS] Yeah, Walker.
What is it? You're kidding.
Roger that.
We're on it.
[KNOCKING] CHUCK: Ellie, are you all right? Chuck, just please go away.
I can't believe your idiot friends ruined my wedding.
I'm s-- I'm never going to forgive Morgan for this.
Well, I think you kind of have to.
Because Morgan and Lester and Jeff, they only did what I asked them to do.
What? I did all this.
I forgot your rings.
So I told them to stall.
So if you're gonna be mad at someone, you should be mad at me.
Please say something.
You ruined the most important day of my life.
Look, Ellie, you have to trust me.
Okay? Take these and I'll take care of the rest.
Trust me.
Sir, how do you spell begonia? Sound it out.
No, no, no.
It clashes with the bunting.
Yes, I-- I appreciate that you require extra time to permit the area but this is a National Security matter.
WOMAN: We are gathered here to join together Eleanor Faye Bartowski and Devon Christian Woodcomb in matrimony.
Who gives this woman in marriage to this man? -We do.
-We do.
-I love you.
-I love you.
You're beautiful.
Watch him.
WOMAN: A partnership should not be entered into lightly but with much consideration.
If any person can show just cause why they should not be joined let them speak now or forever hold their peace.
Sarah.
You're not coming with me, are you? WOMAN: Do you have the rings? Whoo! [CROWD CHEERING] CASEY: What was that crap you were talking about secondhand smoke? Three hundred.
Sir, Roark wants to talk to you.
Watch my cards.
Watch Barber, he cheats.
This better not be about the food.
[GUNSHOTS] Don't.
-Sorry, sir.
We've been through a lot.
-How long have you been Fulcrum? I'm not with Fulcrum.
Go, pull the trigger.
I don't want to look at your face.
You just killed three Marines in cold blood.
Yeah but none of them saved my life.
[WHISPERING INAUDIBLY] ELLIE: Hi.
-Thank you.
-For what? For what? For-- For all of this.
For my wedding gift.
This is-- I don't know how you did all this.
Well, I can't exactly take all the credit.
Well, first the beach and now this.
I don't know.
You're pretty amazing, little brother.
Sometimes I think you have superpowers.
-Yeah, I wish.
-I know.
DEVON: Chuck.
Man, you saved the day.
Looks like you're the big hero.
-Thanks, bro.
-Well, now I really am your bro.
DEVON: Yes, you are.
-Can't believe you're actually leaving me.
-Don't, Chuck.
I'll cry.
We don't want that, do we? I'm happy for you, buddy.
I think you are going to be the greatest hibachi chef in the world.
Don't know.
This whole making your dreams come true thing is hard.
And-- And the bigger the dream, the harder it gets.
You know, on one side, the girl you love and then on the other, life as you know it.
It's just, you know, friends and family, and a job you can't stand.
I don't know.
I should just go with Anna.
Right? But then I-- -I'm overthinking this, aren't I? -Yeah.
Yeah, you are.
Go with your heart, buddy.
Our brains only screw things up.
Where's Bryce? Gone.
They're uploading him with a new computer tonight.
Off to save the world.
I guess both of you are.
You wanna dance? You know I do.
Mr.
Bartowski.
-Or is this an Orion conversation? -A bit of both.
I reconfigured the Cube for you under two conditions.
You stop looking for me, and you leave my son alone.
We asked Chuck to be on my team.
He said no.
Goodbye, Orion.
You made changes to the Intersect.
To my initial designs.
The data architecture is different.
What does this new computer do? You don't want to know.
Agent Larkin, it's time to go.
CHUCK: You belong out there, saving the world.
I'm just-- I'm just not that guy.
How many times do you have to be a hero to realize that you are that guy? I want more, Sarah.
I want a life.
I want a real life.
Chuck, I don't want to save the world.
STEPHEN: Chuck.
Chuck.
-I want-- STEPHEN: The agent-- The agent came for Bryce.
He isn't a CIA agent.
He's supposed to be dead.
Dad, how could you possibly know that? Screw it.
I have an Intersect in my head, I-- I tested the computer, I was young and stupid.
But the intel was good.
That man isn't CIA.
Bryce.
Bryce is getting the upload tonight.
They're gonna kill him, download the Intersect into their team.
Well, if they know about Bryce, they know about Casey.
-Sarah.
-Let her go, son.
-You've done your part.
-I have to go.
No.
No-- No, you don't.
-You're not a spy.
-Dad.
I love her.
I can't follow you, son, but take this.
Thank you.
Be safe, Charles.
Thank you.
CHUCK: I'm coming with you.
-Stay here, it's not your mission.
Wait.
This is the Intersect we're talking about and I'm a Bartowski.
You need me.
Let's go.
Did you see her? Agent Walker? -She was amazing, right? -Yes, sir.
She loves another guy.
-Bad day to be me.
-You have no idea.
MILES: Mr.
Larkin.
[COMPUTER SPEAKS ON-SCREEN TEXT] Open this door.
They're already here.
[BEEPING] Bryce must be in the vault! Chuck, go get help.
CHUCK: Help.
No air.
BRYCE: Hello, Chuck.
CHUCK: Hey.
Bryce.
Bry, Casey and Sarah are pinned down outside.
I'm on it.
Ugh! [GRUNTING] Oh, my God.
Oh, my God, you've been shot.
Yeah.
I'm really sorry about this, Chuck.
No.
No, it's okay.
It's okay.
You're gonna be fine.
It's not that bad.
-Take care of her.
-Don't-- Don't say that.
You're not dying.
She needs you, man.
Okay? You guys are gonna go on missions together-- And do exciting things and save the world.
You'll be a team again.
It'll be great.
She wasn't gonna come.
-She wants-- -Come on, hold on.
Hold on, hold on.
Oh, God.
Here.
This'll destroy the Intersect.
This new computer's too powerful.
It's too dangerous.
But you need-- You need the computer to fight Fulcrum.
Fulcrum doesn't matter.
I think it's just-- They're just one part of The Ring.
They'll use it against us, Chuck.
You have to do this.
You have to destroy that computer and then you get out of here.
But you could beat them.
Bryce.
Bryce? Oh, my God.
I can't figure out why Bryce did this.
Why he chose me.
You can do anything.
I've seen you.
You can't put him out in the field.
He won't survive.
It's time for you to become a spy.
I'm just Chuck Bartowski.
Not a hero.
How many times do you have to be a hero to realize that you are that guy? [GRUNTING] [BEEPING] What did you do? What did you do? I destroyed it.
-You're too late.
MILES: For that, you'll die last.
Bryce.
Bryce.
Bryce.
No, wait.
No! Don't you touch him! [MOUTHING] I'm sorry.
MILES: There's nothing left.
So you lose.
MILES: You should know this: No one stops us.
No one ever has.
-Who are you? -Spies, Agent Walker.
The best.
MAN: Sir, you should look at this.
Chuck, did you just flash? He uploaded it.
Oh, Chuck me.
Kill him.
Uh.
Chuck? Guys.
I know kung fu.