Cow and Chicken (1997) s01e07 Episode Script


Mama had a chicken. ♪
Mama had a cow. ♪
Dad was proud. He ♪
didn't care how. ♪
Cow. ♪
Chicken. ♪
Cow and Chicken! ♪
Ha ha ha ha!
Ooh! Hee hee!
Ooh! Hey, thanks a lot, Cow.
You ate all the pork chips,
and I didn't get none.
I'll split this one with you.
Well, I guess it's better
than a kick in the head.
That's it!
You kids are out of control!
Just look at what you've done!
What a mess!
You've got that right.
We've got a real
discipline problem here.
You kids are going to
military school tonight.
It made men out of Mom and me.
Aah! Oomph!
Hello. It's me--
your drill sergeant!
Welcome to your new home.
On your feet, soldiers!
Oh, you disgust me,
you pathetic
weenie-armed fat bags!
Especially you!
Fall in!
Just what do you call
those, soldier?!
It's my udder, sir.
Yeah, I bet!
Forward, march!
One, two.
One, two. One, two. One, two!
Oh, do you think I
forgot about you?
Oh, yes, thank you. It's very--
Shut your piehole!
Not to worry.
I'll just take a
little off the top.
One, two. One, two. One, two!
I'd like some blueberry
waffles, please.
I don't think I like
this place, Chicken.
I don't like it
none either, Cow.
Shut up and eat your
beans and biscuits!
Disgusting. Ew!
Oh, our little
buffet is now over!
5 and 5 and 5 is 10 ♪
I'm gonna make you manly men! ♪
Company, halt! I want you gals
to run through these tires.
All right, ladies! Run!
Oh! Ooh! Ow! Ooh! Ow!
Ooh! Eee! Ow! Ooh! Eee! Ow!
So we're grading a little
poorly today, are we?
Yes, sir!
Poorly, sir!
Wimp, wimp, wimp! Scare out!
That was pathetic!
All right. Let's do it again
with full battle
gear and toiletries.
Yes, sir! Yes, sir!
Thank you, sir. May I
have another, sir?
Thank you, sir. May I
have another, sir?
Thank you, sir. May
we have another, sir?
Well, kids, how was
military school?
Yes, sir! Fine, sir!
Well, I hope you
learned what it means
to have discipline.
Shoe's untied!
Drop and give me 50!
One, two! One, two! One, two!
Fall in for inspection!
Uh uh uh.
You call that kitchen clean?!
Drop and give me 50!
Oh, my goodness. What
have our kids become?
Don't worry. I think
I know what to do.
Hello! Welcome to
sensitivity training.
I'm Mrs. Beaver,
your personal
sensitivity trainer.
Ah! Well, then,
let's get started, shall we?
Please walk this way.
Hey. Oh. Come on. No.
No, no, no, no, no.
Feel your feelings.
Nobody loves you.
And you never get to do
what you want to do.
Oh, oh, that's wonderful.
And drift and float
and drift and float and drift.
Pull and breathe.
Pull and breathe.
And dip and brush
and dip and brush.
Oh, display legs.
Lather. Shave!
And towel off.
Well, kids, how's it
feel to be back home?
Oh, my! Oh, my! This
shall never do.
Oh, my! What have we
done to our children!
I just had a terrible dream.
Cow and Chicken
were too tough
And then they were too soft.
Yes! I had the same dream!
That must have been
one of those
Shared dreams. Yes.
Whew! Well, thank goodness
they're just right.
Clang, clang, clang
went the trolley ♪
Ding, ding, ding
went the bell ♪
Zing, zing, zing
went my heartstrings ♪
From the moment I
saw him, I fell ♪
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