Cow and Chicken (1997) s04e03 Episode Script

The Full Mounty

Mama had a chicken. ♪
Mama had a cow. ♪
Dad was proud, he didn't care how. ♪
Cow! ♪
Chicken! ♪
Cow and Chicken! ♪
Rise and shine!
Coming, papa!
Do you kids know just how lucky you are
to get an inside
look at how the government works?
Yes! Oh, yippee!
Oh, Chicken,
I get goose pimples all up and down
my legs just thinking about my work!
Yeah, where else would you get em?
Well, here we are at the salt mines.
So, what do you think, off spring?
Not bad, eh?
I guard the loose change
to make sure it doesn't go anywhere.
Don't go changing on me.
I like you just the way you are.
Oh, man! I love my job!
Mr. Dad? Get your legs down
to the conference room.
Guess I'm gonna have to leave
you guys alone with all this change!
Back in five!
Don't mind me, ma'am.
Pretend I'm not here!
I am a Canadian Office Mounty.
I cruise the halls and elevators
of this fine building
to keep it safe from undesirables!
Again! This time, extra fast!
That's a little too fast.
What do you hear, Fido?
What the heck is that?
It's a cop! We're busted!
Canadian Mounty. Open up!
Oh, is this a bring your livestock
to work day?
No? I don't think so!
But we are not farm animals, sir.
We are "Cow" and "Chicken".
Yeah. Our Dad works here.
Yeah? What's his name?
Oh, yeah, right! You made that up!
Let me see some I.D.!
There's my Dad. Ask him.
Very fun
They're leaving the interview!
Dumb machine!
I guess
we're gonna have to starve to death.
The paper clips blew that way.
This means I am down wind.
Or maybe up wind.
Anyway, they will not catch my scent.
I can stalk them cleanly.
Where we gonna find more change?
Beats me.
Hey! Free chips!
A clue!
These tracks are fresh, and quite tasty.
They went that away.
Stop in the name of the Crown!
It is like a nightmare!
We're being stalked like animals!
Oh, now it's a waiting game.
We must remain calm, patient,
and above all, quiet,
so as not to reveal our position.
Man, I hate that stupid horse thing
you do with your mouth!
I am so tired.
I just wish to lay down and go to sleep.
Cow! Get up!
You can't sleep! He'll catch us!
Come on, Cow!
Wake up! Wake up! Wake up!
We gotta stay awake all night!
And as you can see,
revenue has dropped sharply this year.
However, if we were to tax the poor,
sick and elderly,
it would look like this!
And, what do the farm animals represent?
Fear not, noble bureaucrats! I am here!
Run! It's the crazy Forest Ranger!
Stay cool! Stay cool!
Just what do you think you are doing, man?
Well, I am Raoul Sinropa.
A Royal Canadian Mounty.
These animals are trespassing.
This is the United States of America, sir!
We do not employ Canadian Mounties here.
You don't?
No. We don't.
All right! I'm a rogue Mounty!
I was kicked
out of Canadian Mounty School,
because I wasn't Canadian.
I'm Uruguayan!
It is every Uruguayan boy's dream
to be a Canadian Mounty!
I grew up that way.
But Da Da wanted me to be a meter maid!
Like him and his father before him!
So, I run away! And here I am.
There you are!
So, we finally found you, Raoul!
Surely you didn't think
we'd forgotten about you!
We've been worried sick about you!
Crud, in a big way!
The Uruguayan Meter Maid Interpol.
You've paid in full
for the Meter Maid School Course,
and you are going to finish it!
No! No, no! No!
Oh no, please. No! No! No!
Well, Dad, you know what they say?
If the meter maid's skirt fits
then wear it!
Oh, come on! End already!
Oh. Gracias.
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