DC's Legends Of Tomorrow (2016) s04e12 Episode Script

The Eggplant, the Witch & the Wardrobe

1 Previously on "Legends of Tomorrow" You and I dating would be totally weird.
Totally weird.
Hank is running some secret project.
A man came to me, Neron.
He offered me a deal.
Don't tell me you're having second thoughts.
I have a new partner now.
My son.
I don't need you anymore.
I don't need you anymore, either.
- Dad? - I'm sorry.
I didn't kill Nate's dad.
Sara, you're asking me to risk everything for some conspiracy theory? For a bunch of monsters? - Ava, don't do this.
- I'm done.
Ava and I didn't just get into an argument.
She asked me to leave.
Come on, Ava, open up.
Look, I I miss you.
And I'm sorry things went down the way they did, but please just open the door.
Well, technically this is still our apartment.
So I was saying Nora, what are you doing here? - Uh, I can explain.
- I can explain.
I didn't kill Hank, it was a demon.
Yeah, I know.
His name is Neron and he's wearing Desmond as a bleeding suit.
- Ray! - Sara! Great news.
Hank was killed by a demon.
"Great" was not the word he was looking for.
- Poor Nate.
- Look, Ava is missing.
- Missing? - I I should have - checked on her sooner.
- It's Neron.
He has his sights set on the Time Bureau and the creatures, and if he got to Hank, then dingdongs to donuts, Ava was next.
- Hey, she is not dead.
- Listen, when Neron was out the Bureau, he and I shared a connection.
If you can take me to Ava's place, I might be able to know where he took her.
Demons communicate, he'll know your past, how susceptible you are.
You're a liability.
She's not a liability.
She's a survivor.
Unlike you, she's turned her dark experiences into a source of strength, not an excuse for alcoholism or chain smoking.
She also saved your life.
Would you like to add anything? No, that about covers it.
I don't care if she's a liability.
If Neron has Ava, then I need all the magical firepower that we've got.
You two with me.
Woman the ship.
This is from two weeks ago.
Oh She's been gone a tick.
That's not good.
Yeah, thanks.
- There.
- What? What do you see? He had her.
- Ava - That doesn't mean she's dead.
It doesn't mean she's alive, either.
I know where she is.
Conspiracies, embezzling, paper trails I feel like Julia Roberts in "Erin Brockovich.
" We're more Pacific Gas and Electric, Gary.
- Wait, we're the bad guys? - I don't know who we are, Gary, all right? We're the guys trying to keep my dad's cracked out idea of Jur-magic Park from tanking the Time Bureau.
All right? So anything that has to do with Heyworld, get rid of it! How am I gonna explain all this to Director Sharpe? Actually, Ava's missing.
I knew it.
I knew it, you know, I had a dream about her where she was driving and I was in a car seat in the back.
- We were headed to Schul.
- Gary.
She needs me.
I got I got Sara, Constantine, and Nora are looking for her.
- Nora? - Look, she didn't kill Hank.
- Come on, man.
- Just listen, okay? Your dad made a deal with a demon named Neron.
I guess something went wrong and the demon killed him.
I'm sorry, buddy.
My dad made a deal with a demon to open a theme park? Oh, Ray, I don't know how much more of this I can take, man.
- Is that you? - No.
If this is my dad's mistress, I'm gonna jump out a window.
- Hello? - Yo, Mr.
, it's Mikey T.
Listen, got a question for you about the dragon lair.
Could sure use your eyes down here.
Uh, do-down where? - What? Here, at the site.
- Uh, Buckwood Downs? - Uh, yeah, where else? - Talk to you later.
Who was it? I don't know, he sounded like a Soprano, but apparently my dad started building this theme park.
The guys who were working with him, maybe they know something about this Neron a-and why he killed my dad.
Come on! I'm Steel, you're The Atom.
There is nothing we cannot handle! [CHUCKLES.]
This one.
Ava? Hey.
She's alive.
- What did he do to her? - He's preparing her.
Neron must be looking for a new vessel.
It only makes sense going after Ava, especially if he wants control over the Time Bureau.
But when a demon possesses someone, the body has to be willing, and if it's not, the demon has to force his way in by sending the soul to purgatory.
That's where the real fight begins.
How do we save her? Some souls go up and some go down.
But if she's been there as long as she has, then she's not coming back, Sara.
I'm not giving up on her, John.
You're going to send me to purgatory to get her.
If I send you down there with her, there's nothing that I can do to protect you.
- I'll take my chances.
- This isn't something you can just fight your way through, love.
John, please! Fine.
Lay down.
Our purgatory is designed to drive the soul to breaking point.
It's tailored to drive the captive mad.
Now where you're going, that's Ava's personal nightmare.
I've died, lost my soul, and escaped a demon realm.
I'm pretty sure I can handle Ava's purgatory.
Well, prepare for the worst, Sara Lance.
I gotta get out of here.
I can't do this anymore.
I just gotta get out of here.
Ava! Hey.
- Oh, thank God.
- Oh, my God.
- Sara, is that really you? - It's me.
I got you.
What the hell happened? Am I dead? You were kidnapped by a demon and he's trying to take over your body so he trapped your soul here in your own personal purgatory.
But Ava, if you check out, you die.
Well, that's kind of on the nose, isn't it? Wait, does that mean that he got you too? No.
I'm taking you home.
I got it! Natari! I'm gonna regret asking this, but what's that? It's your couple's name.
Nat for Nate and of course Ari is for you.
You know I'm a superhero, right? With a flick of my wrist I could blast you with my wind powers.
Being honest, wind powers, just not that scary.
Yeah, you're like a magical hair dryer.
What is this? "Legends Eye for the Straight Guy"? - You're straight? - Where's Sara? Uh, she's with Constantine and Nora, trying to find Ava.
Actually, they've just returned, and Mr.
Constantine has called a team meeting in the lab.
- He can do that? - No.
Let's go, dummies.
- Ava's in hell? - She's not in hell.
Her soul is trapped in limbo.
And I am right there with her.
- Oh, Gary.
- Emotionally.
Poor Director Sharpe.
I've sent Sara down there to try and pull her out.
- I thought that they broke up.
- She still loves her.
- What can we do? - Sara chose to go in after her so unless praying is your thing, then the best thing you can do is wait.
You don't have to worry.
- Whoa, whoa, whoa.
- Uh - Oh, he's all right.
- I'll take good care of her.
All right, Charlie, you're with me - This should be interesting.
- Let's go find out what this demon wants, shall we? - You up for it? - Mm.
All right then, let's raise some hell.
Oh, how you doing? Can I help you guys? Yeah, we're looking for Mr.
Uh, Mr.
Who's asking? 'Cause no one's allowed on this site unle Hey, I know you.
I'd recognize that Heywood jaw line anywhere.
You must be "And Son.
" You kidding me? Hank is always going on about you.
Where where is he? - Hank passed.
- What? Jeez, I sorry to hear that.
You mind if we take a look around? Hey, it's all yours now, kid.
Question: did my dad ever mention a man by the name of Neron? Neron? What is that, Greek? No, it's Demonic Danish, actually.
No, never heard of the guy.
A-actually, to be honest with you, Hank didn't really tell me a lot.
All he gave me was was this.
We're building that right now.
A unicorn rodeo.
Can you imagine? Two unicorns jousting? [CHUCKLES.]
I'd rather not.
Hey, come here, come here.
This is what I was calling you guys about.
- About the, uh - Dragon lair.
Yeah, I know.
I drew it.
- I drew all of this.
- Great, tell me something.
Look at this.
See this here? What is this? [FADING OUT.]
Is this supposed to be real flame, or were you thinking, like, plexi? 'Cause I got a guy that can do fire.
Like forget about it.
I can't believe he did it.
I know you and your dad struggled and even if you got your wires crossed, you never stopped trying to connect.
I just hope my dad knew I loved him.
Oh, he knew.
Look at this place.
You know, I just wish he would have found a better way to, you know, tell me he loved me.
One that didn't involve teaming up with a demon and embezzling money from the government.
It's a bit much.
Mikey T! Mikey T! Change of plans.
Tear it down.
The dragon lair? The whole thing.
Waiting sucks.
Ooh, sexting Nate? - Boundaries, Mona.
- I need vicarious feels.
There are more important things to focus on right now and Nate's got a lot going on.
- It's not the right time.
- What are you typing? - Hey, what's up? - Ugh Okay, I don't even know why I'm talking to you two about it.
You don't even date humans.
Love's love.
Whatever you need, I'm here.
Whatever you need, I'm here.
Why is Gary in your subconscious? I may have some Gary issues that need working out.
Okay, we just we need to find the door that you came in.
Does any of this look familiar? No, it all looks exactly the same.
Why don't we just try to follow the arrows back? Maybe they'll take us to the entrance.
Reminder, shoppers, the store will be closing in one hour.
Constantine didn't say anything about that.
What does it mean? It means we take shortcuts.
Come on.
- Hello, again, ladies.
- Damn it.
- Okay, this way.
- No! Or we could just ask Gary.
How do we get to the entrance? Oh We're not really allowed to give that kind of advice.
- Come on - But, the Ergrik wardrobe might be just the thing you're looking for.
Looks like the wardrobe section.
Now what? I think we're supposed to put it together.
No sweat.
Wait, wait, wait.
Step one, insert the dowel.
- Here, babe.
- I got this.
Shut up, man! What you gonna do about it? [WHISTLING "POP GOES THE WEASEL".]
You kidding me? Why, you brain-damaged? Papa's home.
Miss me? I missed you.
We'll be together soon, my pet.
Not bloody likely.
Oh, Nora.
There's nowhere for you to run now, you bile bladder.
Me, run? You're the one who ran.
All I had to do was say, "I'm coming for you, Johnny.
" And you left 2018 to me.
It's delicious how easily humans are corrupted, - especially here in D.
- So that's your game? You inflict fear and anger on humanity? I merely fan the flames.
People are primed to give in to what they fear most.
You know what, mate? I am going to send your ass straight back to hell.
- John, this isn't the plan.
- Nora, we finally get to talk.
Hope you've enjoyed your little dalliances inside my mind.
But it's not a one way street.
Is it, Nora? - Ugh - I knew you were a liability.
We should be off with him.
You're playing right into his hands, John.
You're the one who can't handle this.
Oh, yes, says Miss-Lock-Herself-Up because she can't handle her own demons.
Well, this is me handling mine, all right? [CHANTING.]
- He's getting to you.
- Oh, he's getting to me? - Yeah.
- He's inside your head.
What, you don't think I haven't seen you struggling? Humanity hasn't exactly been kind to you, has it, Nora? You're addicted to this kind of power, and believe me, it doesn't go away.
No it doesn't and it hasn't been easy, but if I can trust myself, I don't think it's too much to ask for you to try too.
Oh, it's killing you to look at his face.
I know how hard it is to watch someone you love become a demon.
Yeah, well too bad there aren't any Beebos around to hug it to death.
We can't just keep him locked up in there, driving us all mad.
Yeah, well, I think between the two of us, we can figure something out.
Ta-dah! - Damn it.
- What a surprise.
You followed none of the instructions and it didn't work.
I'm sensing that this isn't about the dresser.
No, this is what you always do.
- Just bulldoze your way though.
- I do not always do this.
Like lying to me about the Kaupe? You were defending torturing creatures.
Defen I wasn't defending it.
I was defending myself.
Of course I don't believe that we should be intentionally hurting anything or anyone but when we fight, Sara, I get really scared, and I just go to my corner.
Look, it's just fight or flight.
It couldn't be any more human.
I just really need to know that you're on my team.
I am always on your team, even when we disagree.
Now, should we give it another go? [UPBEAT MUSIC.]
Thank you.
- Ah.
- Uh-huh.
See? Following instructions is not that bad.
Oh, don't gloat.
Let's get out of here.
Something's wrong.
Did we miss a screw or something? No - [SIGHS.]
We missed this.
- It's How the hell did we possibly miss this? Damn it.
Hey, look.
It's not perfect, but it's ours.
Can you live with that? Hey? Don't go in your corner.
- Yeah, I can live with it.
Hell yeah.
Let's go to Narnia.
Are we out? We're out of the closet but not the store.
Welcome to our mattress showroom.
If you'll follow me? The mattress you choose will be the most important decision of your life.
Wait, you're showing them the mattresses? We need everyone out before Tabitha gets here.
Who the hell is Tabitha? You don't want to know Tabitha.
Best of luck in your mattress choice.
- Wait, we need to - Gary, wait This is starting to feel like that escape room we did.
Okay, so, subconscious Gary said this would be the most important choice of our life.
What do you think that means? That even subconscious Gary needs to get a life? No, it's a puzzle.
Do you what does it mean? Do you think we need to It means we need to pick a mattress.
- How about this one? - What? Oh.
Whoa, 600 bucks? That is ridiculously - Three-year warranty? - Expensive, right? I was thinking, like, $250.
Wha Are you kidding? It would be saggy in like a year.
So you just flip it over.
You just flip it over? Is that what you do when things get saggy, you just flip 'em over so you don't have to look at their saggy faces? Okay.
How about this one? Fifteen years.
Oh, that's better.
Oh, when did you start going grey? Whoa.
This place has been really stressful.
Ugh! I think it's the mattress.
Apparently your purgatory is your anxieties.
One of which must be getting old.
I'm not worried about getting old, Sara.
I'm worried about getting old with you.
So we're talking about marriage.
Um Wow.
You look, um, still really hot but - You too.
Oh, well, 50 years is a long time sleeping on one mattress.
It sure is.
Look, I know it's a lot.
50 years with just one person.
Well, it's it's not the one person thing.
I just Look, I've never really thought that much past tomorrow.
Ava, with my past, planning anything for the future is just Feels like tempting fate.
And I convinced myself that I like it that way.
Until you came along.
You just freaking came to purgatory for me.
How's that for giving the middle finger to fate? Look, you're allowed to want things sometimes, Sara.
But what if I can't be the person that you need? Let's be honest, neither of us needs anybody.
Right? But you are who I want.
I bet you there's some good liquor in Ava's office.
I mean, my dad's old office.
Oh, man.
Things are bleak.
Hey, Ray, thanks for sticking around here.
Yeah, buddy, of course.
That's what friends are for.
I just wish I wasn't such an idiot at my dad's funeral.
I had a chance to talk to him, but I blew it.
Now I'll never know what happened.
Well, maybe Constantine can get you some answers.
- Looks like they caught Neron.
- Son of a bitch.
Is that the demon who killed my dad? Whoa, there, Squire.
You take it easy, all right? Nate, you don't want to go in there.
- Just walk away.
- No.
- Not a chance.
- Wait! Wait! Hello, Nathaniel.
I've heard so much about you.
So predictable.
The son, who, in life, could never connect with the father.
Here now, seeking the truth.
Well, here it is.
Hank was an unfortunate snag in my plans so I - You evil bastard.
- Yeah.
Nate's already angry, makes him prime pickings for Neron.
No, he'll be all right.
As long as he doesn't cross that bloody barrier.
Ahh! Why? He built your theme park just like you wanted.
You think I wanted a theme park? I gave Hank power and in return, he was to supply me with fear mongering magical creatures to terrorize people into giving up their souls.
Instead, he went behind my back and built some deranged zoo.
He betrayed me - because of you.
- No.
If you'd had just stayed out of our way, maybe your old man would still be alive.
Nate, no wait! [LAUGHING.]
Ray, I'm sorry.
I'm sorry, man.
It's okay, buddy, I know it wasn't you.
It's locked.
Uhh, there's nothing to build.
No furniture to choose.
Piece of cake.
Go, go, go.
Yeah, this seems more like one of your fantasies than your fears, watching me do dishes.
Please, if it were up to you, we would only have paper plates.
You on that? - Got it.
- Hm.
I'm on it.
It never ends.
- Did you send it? - Honestly, mate, whatever happened to just talking to someone? Emoji's are way more fun and if he's not that into it, you can pretend like you were talking about something else.
Nate's gonna think I was dying to tell him about a dancing lady carrying a burning eggplant.
Here, use words.
It's erotic but vulnerable.
Okay, let me see it.
I'm not saying "bulge.
" Sula the Wolf Witch talked about smothering a demon.
Does that make sense to you? When Mallus was a part of me I could feel his fear.
He was vulnerable here on Earth.
- It made him nervous.
- So if we can separate the demon from his earthly vessel, it will suffocate him.
Just like a fish out of water.
Why are you even working with that arrogant dick? He'll never value your true power.
Not like I will.
You all right there, love? Yeah.
I just need some coffee.
I'm fine.
- And I'm sober.
- Hey.
Are you okay? I'm all right.
You best let her alone, Squire.
This is all your mail! You deal with it.
It's not like you have an address to even get mail, so.
We both talked about it and agreed that now wasn't the right time for me to move in with you.
- But we're making it work.
- Are we? Because how I see it, we're living completely separate lives, so.
Ava, I want this, just, when the time is right.
Timing doesn't just happen, Sara.
Okay, you have to make a choice.
So what? This? This is what you want? No, of course.
Nobody just wants dirty dishes but, yes.
Ava, we are time-traveling superheroes.
Okay, fine, but I'm not just my job.
I want some hobbies.
I want I want a life with you.
And sometimes life is Is just this.
Okay? It's boring.
What then? You off to the next adventure? No! But I can't just decide every single moment of forever right this instant.
So please just tell me what you want me to say and I'll say it and we can get out of here.
I can't tell you what to say, Sara, because then it wouldn't mean anything.
Okay, well.
Let's just let's move to the suburbs and we'll just recycle until we die.
Can we go now? [DRAMATIC MUSIC.]
Oh, no.
It's just me.
Let's talk.
I've admired your power for a long time, Nora.
I don't take compliments from people who frame me for murder.
All in the interest of self-preservation.
You understand.
Do they even know what you're capable of? - They have no idea.
- Then why waste your time with that arrogant bastard and his pathetic delusion that the world needs him to save it? When I met John, I was just a kid.
He was kind.
Mallus wanted me, but I wasn't ready.
But I'll tell you this.
John did everything he could to save me.
But when he failed, he abandoned me.
John knew what the Order were doing to me and he just let them.
And he's the one who decides who to send to hell.
Cocky cowboy wearing his hangover like a ten-gallon hat.
He might have won that last battle, but the war is mine.
My Tabitha will be free soon and when she is, we're gonna put John away for good.
Tabitha? That's why you needed Ava as a vessel.
There's a model for everyone.
Are you looking for one to clean? One to keep you safe? One to please you? No, you creep.
I'm looking for Ava.
They're all Ava.
No, they're not.
Just remember, pick quickly.
Tabitha will be here soon and once she's here [FOREBODING MUSIC.]
Oh, no.
Once she's here, what? Attention, the store will be closing in five minutes.
I can't believe I got my dad killed.
No, it was Hank's choice to make a deal with a demon.
That is not your fault.
You spending time with him inspired him.
Made him happy.
I don't think you doomed him.
I think you saved him.
Here's to the man you helped your dad become.
You know what, Ray? You're right.
I shouldn't be embarrassed, I should be proud.
Yeah, my dad was a little wacky, but most of the good ones are.
He was a Legend and he should be remembered that way.
- Ah! Mikey T! I got to stop him.
Sara will never let you take Ava.
If not her, I'll find someone else.
You know, I can bring back other people.
Damien misses you so much.
- You can bring my father - Of course.
Now be a lamb and let me out, Nora, doll.
You know, you can't just walk out of here.
Constantine will never let you do that.
Maybe as Desmond.
But if you let me in, you, with my power? Nobody could stop us.
The monitors were wonky.
Are you all right? Of course.
You shut them down.
I should have never trusted you.
Shut up, John.
Attention: the store will be closing in two minutes.
Where is she? None of these are Ava.
I'm not leaving without her! Ava.
But you could have chosen any one of those other women.
I don't want other women.
- Hey.
- Oh.
You did it.
We did it.
- We did it! - Jeez.
Let's do this.
Vessel what a pretty word for victim.
Oh, I don't need your power, Neron.
I have my own.
We've got him.
Oh, just a few minutes more.
Nora! Ray, no! [GRUNTING.]
Guys, guys, guys, guys.
Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey.
It's okay.
It's okay, mate.
It's all right.
Where am I? You're safe.
Nora? Nora? Eggplant's a little obvious.
I say you go with mushroom.
Mushroom - [ALL GASP.]
- Ava! You're back from the dead.
- I knew you'd do it, Captain.
- Uh, gently.
- Sorry, sorry, sorry.
- Oh, nice job, boss.
Okay, serious, which emojis like All right, enough with the emoji.
Just leave while you can.
You should just Okay You know, we should probably talk about whether or not we want kids.
Eh, let's wait until the other eight are old enough to handle the news.
I don't even know what this text means anymore.
"You up? Hot dog, donut, thumbs up.
" Well, you wanna snog him, yeah? Or do you want him to get diabetes? Okay, this doesn't sound like me at all.
You like him and he likes you, just tell him that.
Okay, uh "Want to go out sometime [CLEARS THROAT.]
On a date"? [GASPS.]
Oh, yeah.
See? That wasn't so bad.
Now, it's all on Nate.
Oh, God.
Oh, God, what did I do? [MACHINERY BUZZING.]
Mikey, pick up.
Mikey, pick up.
You can just drop that down.
You're not gonna need it.
Mikey, no! Mikey! Mikey, stop! [PHONE BLEEPS.]
Ha! [MOANS.]
Is that you, And Son? I changed my mind.
What are you doing? You should have just called.
I knew I should have synced to the stupid cloud.
- Hey.
- Hi, uh So, um, uh, about [CLEARS THROAT.]
About that text Oh, yeah, um [CLEARS THROAT.]
My phone had an unfortunate run-in with a wrecking-ball, so, uh [CHUCKLING.]
Oh, my God.
That sucks.
What'd you wanna talk about? I I I just wanted to let you know that Sara and Ava they're good.
- That's great! - Yeah.
Anything else you wanna talk about? No, no, not that I can think of.
Cool, cool, cool.
Glah yeah, bye.
- Zari - Bye.
Hello? Is there anyone here who can call me a cab? Anything you need, mate.
I can get you a flight to New Orleans, anywhere in the world, you name it.
I don't want anything from you.
I'm not asking for forgiveness, Des.
Just wait wait, Des.
You saved me, Johnny.
I'm grateful for that.
But it doesn't change anything.
I know.
You know I can make it all go away, Des.
This will make you forget.
You sent me to hell.
That's something we're both gonna have to live with.
How's she holding up, old son? She's stable, but unresponsive.
Well, that's better than the alternative.
I couldn't let her get hurt again.
Oh, yeah, well, you just rolled straight in there like a knight in shining armor and nearly got her killed.
I didn't mean to.
Yeah, I know.
She's a brave lass, nearly cost her her life.
But she killed that bloody demon.
She's amazing.
We'll get you out of this one, Nora.
I'm not gonna abandon you again.
- Whoa.
- It's okay, boy.
Dogs usually love me.

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