DC's Legends Of Tomorrow (2016) s04e14 Episode Script

Nip | Stuck

1 Previously on "Legends of Tomorrow" What kind of egg is that? - It's a dragon egg.
- Oh.
Okay, you got possessed by Neron.
I can't stop! I give up.
Do you hear me, Neron? Spare Nate and I'll let you have me.
- Neron? - I can make you whole again.
- My nipple.
- Gary, no! [GRUNTS.]
Nora, I need your help.
I am asking you to face another demon as a member of the Time Bureau.
Let's do this.
All right, enough of the sightseeing.
Can we go now? I'm a bit knackered, to be honest with you, mate.
We're not here as tourists, Johnny.
Ah, right, you're gonna get rid of me in some dramatic fashion.
Get on with it, will you? I'm not gonna kill you.
Not yet, anyway.
- I need you for a favor.
- Is that right? Mm, I need you to open up a doorway to hell.
Oh, right.
Well, why didn't you say so? I will gladly open up a vortex right here and give you the old heave-ho to the great beyond.
The door is not for me, Johnny.
It's to bring someone here from the other side.
Ah, that's right.
If she comes straight through the doorway, she doesn't need a human vessel.
And what in that demented demon brain of yours makes you think that I'm going to open a vortex for you, eh? Unlike Gary, I've still got both my nipples, so you don't have much to bargain with.
Speaking of which, what have you done with the Muppet? Gary's just fine.
He's back at the Time Bureau taking care of business.
Okay, Nora, you can do this.
Just be normal.
You can be normal.
- 'Cause you are normal.
- Next.
- Come on! [QUIRKY MUSIC.]
That's your ID picture? They wouldn't let me retake it.
Oh, it can't be that bad.
Let me see.
Uh, maybe we'll just use your photo from the wanted poster.
So your ID is in process.
And you have me to help you with your orientation.
All that's left is this.
What the hell's that? It's your start paperwork.
No, I should be out looking for Ray.
I really have to fill all this out? I know.
I know, Nora.
But until we have a line on Neron, there's really nothing we can do.
And let's be honest, Nora.
You have a storied history here.
I need you to prove that you can be a team player.
Have fun.
Oh, and you know what, Nora? I'm really, really proud of you.
Welcome to the Bureau.
Director Sharpe.
I've been waiting for you.
Gary, I told you, no playing with my chair until after hours.
Oh, playtime's over.
Shut the door.
We need to talk.
If Neron wanted John dead, he would have killed him on the spot.
He must need something from him.
We have to find them before he can get what he wants.
Who knows what he's doing in Ray's name or his perfectly grass-fed organic butter body? If Haircut's even there.
We don't know that Ray is gone.
Look, everybody just breathe.
Gideon's already on it.
I've attuned the magic-o-meter to Constantine's frequency.
When he uses his abilities, I can zero in on his location.
And what do we do till then? - Stress eat.
- Drink.
Yeah, how'd you lot survive until now? Look, until we get an alert, we wait.
Right, we wait.
I gotta go clear my head.
What do you think this is about? With everything that's been going on, I bet Director Sharpe is about to lay down the plan of attack.
I've gathered you here because today we're setting time aside to conduct performance reviews.
But this time, I thought it would be useful if you were assessed by one of your peers, Agent Gary Green.
- Seriously? - Huh? Thanks, doll.
How are my babies doing? [SNIFFS.]
Let's rap for a sec.
Is Gary cool now? That's impossible.
Now, I know performance reviews can be quite a drag, but this year's gonna be different 'cause you've got superagent Gary Green in your corner.
So no need to stress unless your infraction is looking too good in that suit.
Agent Reyes knows what I'm talking about.
Oh, my God.
I think she just swooned.
This is a nightmare.
So I'll be meeting with agents one-on-one, and, uh, wait till I call your name.
Looking forward to some good face time.
Ava, are you sure this is the best time for performance reviews? There's no better time to assess the performance of our operation.
But are you sure Gary's qualified for responsibilities? Of course, Mona.
Gary Green is all the man we need.
Oh, my, what a big, scary knife you've got.
I'd sooner be filleted than do your bidding.
This knife is not for you.
It's for Raymond.
The human body is fascinating.
Delicate, fragile.
Did you know that if I cut this artery right here, it will take only a matter of minutes before Ray's body goes into shock and eventually expires? Hey, big man.
Come on.
I know you're in there.
Snap out of it, eh? Ray's gone.
I've taken over his body.
We made a deal.
And you of all people should know what it means to make a deal with a demon.
Now, if Ray was still in here, would he do this? [SPEAKING FOREIGN LANGUAGE.]
I knew I could make you use your magic.
Great, yeah.
So you got me.
What's that big grin all about, eh? Patience.
You'll see.
Huh, I always took you to be more Springsteen than "The Rite of Spring.
" It's not for me.
It's I read that classical music is good for babies.
Wow, this is very, um, impressive.
Yeah, I found a book about dragons in Constantine's collection.
"The egg must incubate under the mother at her body temperature lest the egg expire.
" Yeah, I'm not gonna sit on that thing.
I figured as much.
That's why I got a heat lamp.
We have to do everything possible to make sure nothing bad happens to this egg.
- Hey.
- Hmm? The egg's gonna be okay.
I know it.
Wait till Ray sees that we have a dragon.
- He's gonna love it.
- Yeah.
I've picked up an alert with Constantine's magical signature.
That's them.
The signal is coming from 1.
3 million years ago.
That's the Ice Age.
He's in the part of North America that would come to be known as the Donner Pass, named after a doomed group of settlers in the 1800s who resorted to cannibalism after their food supplies ran out.
There is such thing as too much exposition, Gideon.
Hah, there they are.
Our heroes.
Captain Lance, thanks for coming all this way.
If you're looking for Ray, he's, uh, checked out.
Is Neron on comms? But if you'd like to join him, I can make arrangements.
Sara, open fire now.
This may be your only chance.
We can't fire.
That's Ray.
Ray made a deal with a demon.
He's gone.
We can't lose anyone else to this bastard.
- Do it.
- What about you? Blow us both to kingdom come.
I'll be happy to go to hell for the cause.
Gideon, ready the blasters.
Yes, Captain.
Whoa, whoa.
Hold up! If we kill Neron in Ray's body, we lose Ray forever.
But if you let Neron walk, then things are gonna get much, much worse.
Trust me.
Sara? Well, come on, boss.
Something's wrong.
Awaiting orders, Captain.
Gideon Fire.
It's a trap! [RUMBLING.]
We gotta move! They're getting away! Get us out of here, Gideon! [RUMBLING.]
That's not good.
By my calculations, we're buried beneath 357 feet of ice and snow.
Plus, our primary temporal delineator has been rendered nonfunctional with the extreme weather.
Well, so that's it, then? We're just snowed in? Yeah, at the Donner Pass.
No one's turning me into beef jerky! Everyone calm down.
Gideon, hail the Bureau.
Should we leave a voice mail? Ava will get the alert.
In the meantime, we wait.
Gideon, how long until the ice thaws? The Ice Age ends in 11,121 years.
All right, who we eating first? 'Cause shotgun, not.
Captain, we're running on reserve power.
I recommend disabling all nonessential functions to conserve energy for life support.
Do it.
We need to be responsible and conserve power.
Cut off the main generator, the fabricator, and the thermostat.
Neron is out there with Ray and Constantine all because we fell for his trap because you fired on Ray.
And what was your plan, pretty? Beat him to death in a snowball fight? We were supposed to take him in, - not take him out, Mick.
- Ray's gone! When a team member goes dark, you end them before they end you.
Rory, with me.
You made the call.
You're helping us get out of here.
- No problem.
- All right.
Always assumed I'd go out alone, anyway.
First you kill my friends, and now you bring me to this miserable era.
Oh, Johnny, quit being such a crybaby.
- I just did what I had to do.
Can't have your friends getting in the way of us creating that door to hell.
There's still no way I'm helping you.
Besides, the vortexes I make are strictly one-way.
They suck you in.
And don't you think, if my magic was powerful enough to stabilize a vortex, I wouldn't have saved Desmond or Astra? Yes, and that's why we're here.
As powerful as your magic is, you can always teach - an old dog new tricks.
And it's more than magic that you need to learn.
Oh, yeah, right.
So I'm supposed to learn something off one of these yokels, am I? [LAUGHS.]
No, Johnny.
Not from them.
From a king.
Hold on a minute.
That bloke's got my face.
That's because he's your ancestor.
King Konstentyn, ruler of these parts and progenitor of your magical bloodline.
What kind of creature do you think they're hunting? Can't be sure, but I'm guessing it wasn't rabbits.
Make way for your king! [SIGHS.]
Start paperwork, am I right? My forms keep getting rejected because records show I'm 15 and living in a mental institution.
I forget that we don't have normal problems anymore.
Speaking of which, Ava's having Gary - do performance reviews.
- Okay.
I mean, he's not my first choice for responsibilities, but don't we have bigger issues? Exactly.
And when I pointed that out, Ava shut me down.
Not to stereotype, but I think a clone might have replaced her, and we need to look into it.
- No.
- Yes.
- No.
- Yes.
- No! - Yes! No! I just earned my freedom.
And I don't wanna get caught going behind Ava's back.
You heard what she said.
I need to focus on being a team player.
She said Gary is all the man we need.
That's not weird to you? Why is that weird? Gary Green is all the man we need.
Okay, I will check on Gary, and you contact the Waverider and see if Sara knows anything.
- Mm-hmm.
- And then we're gonna find out what form 37-C is.
Ah, this is useless! Why don't we just blast a way out? Using your heat gun in here, Mr.
Rory, will deplete our low supply of oxygen.
Yeah, ease up, Mick.
Last time you pulled the trigger, - we ended up here.
You're pissed at me for firing on Haircut.
Well, it's a good thing that this Snart bloke kept a supply of jackets, though, isn't it? They smell good too, actually.
What is that? Is it sandalwood? Look, I'm pissed at you because that - wasn't your call to make.
- Someone had to make it.
It was our only chance to take out Neron.
I made the call you should have.
All right, guys, come on.
Just pick away, will you? No, this is good.
All of a sudden, now you care about the mission? Where were you when Neron took Ray in the first place? Oh, you're gonna put that on me as well! All right, as much as I wanna watch you guys duke it out, lets save it for when we're not freezing to death.
You know what? Both of you off scamming people at some book convention while there is a demon on our ship.
Mm, let me get this straight, Captain.
You're the only one that can have fun outside of this rusted bucket of bolts? All you do is spend time with the girlfriend and nothing's ever, ever your fault! You know what? You have all the answers.
You get us out of here.
Oh, when I was a boy, we used to run wild in these woods around the village.
Not a care in the world.
These same woods where your children play today and where my hunting party just encountered another dangerous beast that threatens not just our safety but our entire way of life.
Oh, this bloke is right tedious.
Why are we here? Because I want you to learn that it was your ancestor that created the rift between humans and magical creatures.
And why would he do that? Because fear is a powerful source of energy for magic.
The more he exploits these creatures to stir up fear in his people, the more powerful his magic becomes.
I come from a long line of bastards, but not even we would resort to that.
Because your kin are always so right.
And if the king is sending this creature to hell, then surely it deserves it.
Do you really think that everyone in hell deserves to be there? What about Astra or Raymond Palmer or my Tabitha? This is your opportunity to make things right, starting with her.
You know, if your plan is to guilt me into doing what you want by showing me the sins of my forefather, it ain't working, sunshine.
But to another.
Behold the unholy beast! [PEOPLE GASPING.]
Hold on a minute.
That's a Púca.
May not look threatening, but sometimes in order to see the true nature of a creature, one must draw it out.
No, no, no.
He's got it all wrong.
They aren't evil.
Guess your bloodline isn't as righteous as you think it is.
He's clearly misinformed.
Well, if you think that, maybe you should go and have a chat with the king.
You are truly blessed that I am here, for I alone can save you from these monsters.
And tonight at the rise of the low moon, I will banish this creature straight to hell.
Agent Powell, please report to my office for your performance review.
Just need a signal on the Waverider.
That's weird.
What are you doing in here? Uh, just thought I would check on the timeline.
Yep, looks good.
You have clearance for this? Have you completed your performance review? Yes, I've had my performance review.
And how did it go? Gary Green is all the man we need.
ALL: Gary Green is all the man we need.
Nora! You were right.
We have to talk.
But we can't do it here.
The heat lamp must have turned off when Sara shut down the generator.
It's okay, Wickstable.
You're gonna be okay.
What what did you call it? Wickstable.
The drawing I made of Heyworld when I was a kid, the one that inspired my dad, the dragon in it, I named it Wickstable.
I thought we could just name it that.
But I'm open to other ideas.
No, uh, I-I like I like Wickstable.
Our little Wicksty.
I can't believe I'm about to say this, but I think it needs skin-to-skin contact like the book said.
I think it's working.
Hey, uh, why does it feel like we skipped past all the fun stuff into, you know, this? We can still do the fun stuff.
What about the egg? Um, there's other ways we could create heat.
Seriously, dude? - [ZIPPER UNZIPS.]
- Yeah.
Come on, Gideon.
There's gotta be a way to boost the engines.
Ray would know how to read this.
How much longer do we have on life support? Power reserves are at 34 hours, Captain.
- Hey, you got a second? - Not now, Rory.
I actually came here to apologize for, uh, blowing up before.
Wow, that's Thank you.
- And I should have never - And another thing! [QUIRKY MUSIC.]
Give it up, Charlie.
Why were you wearing my face? And were you about to apologize? Only because Charlie was catfishing me.
All right, shut up.
Do you think Ray would be fighting right now? No, he would be trying to get us out of here.
Yeah, you're right.
He's always got a plan.
It's annoying.
All right, let's search Ray's quarters, see if we can find something helpful.
I tried talking to Ava, and all she'd say was, "Gary Green is all the man we need.
" Gary must be controlling the Bureau somehow.
It's those performance reviews.
If we can find out how he's doing it, maybe we can find a way to snap them out of it.
I can try tapping into my powers, see if I can read him.
- If I can get to his office - No! We're all we have left.
We can't risk losing each other.
I've got it.
We'll tell Gary you found some security issues in the containment cells.
You walk him over here like this.
Then I'll close the cell doors and you courier out, - trapping him.
- That's a great idea.
Yeah, just like that.
Okay, it works.
You can let me out now.
I'm sorry.
I can't do that right now.
Sure, you can.
Just use the hand thing.
No, Mona, you need a time-out.
Gary Green is all the man we need.
Go and tell the others to prepare the ritual for tonight.
As you wish, my lord.
You're wasting your time, focusing on that monster.
A Púca only reflects the person it's with.
It's only angry because you scared the fur off it.
That creature doesn't deserve to go to hell.
I see not why I should heed the advice of a stranger.
Then perhaps you will heed the advice of your kin.
I know not of any kin outside of this village.
And yet the similarities of your features I'm a cousin from afar and a practitioner of magic like you.
If you want to rid your village of a real monster, then I know of a demon in our midst that we can banish together.
A demon? In my village? Well, then lead the way, my kin.
But this face stealer with the other creature.
Aye, my liege.
Hell shall have two more guests by the end of the night.
"Cards to Save the Timeline: a team-building card game by Ray Palmer.
" Ah, I miss hating him.
You remember that night when we all met, standing up on that rooftop, and Rip told us that we were gonna be legends? Mm-hmm, embarrassing.
You know what? We're the last of the originals.
Yeah, weird.
Legends were different back then.
We were different back then.
Look, I know that book convention was important to you.
And I'm really glad that you got to go.
I'm glad you have Ava.
- Guess we're growing up and hopefully not growing apart.
Ah, here we are.
What is it? "Ray Palmer's Survival Guide.
" Let me see this.
Oh, hey.
"What to do if you're caught in an avalanche.
" Uh-huh, what does it say? Yeah, we've already tried all of these.
"If all fails, remember you still have each other, so enjoy that as long as it lasts.
" Ah, we're dead.
Hey, it's all right, little one.
I don't bite.
- Ah! I see your talk went well.
Knew you'd be here.
Ah, so I come from a long line of bloody bastards.
- Big reveal.
Have you even considered what it's really gonna be like for you in hell with all those pissed-off folks you sent there just waiting for you? Including my Tabitha.
Who is this bird, anyway? Why is she so important? - Who is she? - Yeah.
You're just like your ancestor.
So convinced you're always right.
You don't even know who you're sending away.
Fitting that he's about to do the same to you.
But once you see how powerful magic can be when fueled by fear, you can save yourself from being sucked to hell.
Oh, you would love for me to stabilize that vortex, wouldn't you? You see, the thing is, I'm not afraid of going to hell.
I've always counted on the fact that I'd end up there one day no matter what.
And what about this innocent creature beside you? [SNARLING.]
Well, I guess I'm just a bloody bastard, then, aren't I? - [CLEARS THROAT.]
- [SIGHS.]
- What's the bad news now? Oh, no bad news.
And no more fighting.
Gideon, fire up the ship.
If I do that, life support capacity will be reduced by half.
You heard me, Gideon.
Turn on the fabricators and turn on the heat.
I'm thinking s'mores, maybe some hot cocoa.
The captain's gone mad.
She's not mad.
She's right.
I could go for a s'more.
Look, Ray would want us to have faith that we will escape.
He wouldn't want us cold and miserable.
So right now, we are going to enjoy our time together.
Let's go.
Let's get some music going.
Who's gonna bring me food if I'm stuck in here? This is how I'm gonna die, isn't it? Without any books or laughter in the basement of a government building? - [WHOOSHING.]
- Whoa.
You're right.
I'm not alone.
I have you.
I'm sorry you're stuck here with me, little one.
Ah, you should be out there in the woods, frolicking about.
Or whatever it is you Púcas get up to these days.
You know, to tell you the truth, I'm bloody well terrified.
- No.
It's not the eternity of torture or the people who are after my head, no.
It's that I'll have to watch Raymond and Astra and all the others I've failed be tortured along with me.
Even led the Legends to their death.
And you're next in line.
- Yeah, that's right.
You sense the rottenness inside me, don't you? No better than the bloody king.
Why would you heal a bastard like me? [PURRING.]
Up with you.
Time to see the king.
All right, then, little one.
Let's go see what this party's all about, shall we? We live in a world of wonder and amazement.
At times, it's beautiful, breathtaking.
At other times, cruel, dangerous And monstrous.
Before you are two foul creatures of the dark, one a grotesque woodland creature that would not hesitate to tear out your heart, the other an imposter, a wielder of the dark arts that would usurp my very body and soul.
Now, my people, I seek your wisdom in these matters.
What would you have me do with such wretched beasts? [PEOPLE CHANTING.]
To hell! To hell! To hell! To hell! To hell! - [WHOOSHING.]
We're very excited for you to receive your performance review.
But what actually happens at the meeting? Feel free to give me any spoilers.
Don't worry.
I had my doubts too.
But then I met with Gary and realized Gary Green is all the man we need.
ALL: Gary Green is all the man we need.
Please step forward, Ms.
Take a seat.
Make yourself comfortable.
Mint? Eh, no, thanks.
Don't mind if I do.
Let's see.
I see you've made quite an impression in your brief time here.
But lately you've been slacking off.
It says right here you've been very disloyal to the Time Bureau.
Not yet, Wolfie.
Okay, I'll judge this round.
You and your team are stuck in a trash compactor in an impromptu and possibly fatal homage to "Star Wars.
" What do you do? - [POPS LIPS.]
- Boom, that's the one.
- Mm-hmm, mm-hmm.
- Yep.
Ooh, gonna have to go with, "Steel up as Sara scales a wall.
" - Another point for me.
Favoritism! Why would I display favoritism? 'Cause you two are obviously shagging.
- What? - Hmm? [SCOFFS.]
Yes, finally! This is great.
Maybe you guys won't be so weird now.
Okay, I'll judge next.
A teammate turns on you, lost to the dark side.
What do you do? [ROCK MUSIC PLAYING.]
"Escape via musical number.
" Not this time.
"Fabricate eveningwear and infiltrate a party.
" You guys know I love a good party sneak.
"Don't give up on each other.
Work together.
You're more than a team.
You are a family.
Well, I guess that card's the winner, then.
Point to Charlie.
I'm on the board.
- The hell was that? - Due to your reckless use of our rapidly depleting energy, internal temperature of the ship has melted the surrounding ice enough to shake the ship loose.
What do we do? We work as a team.
Zari, engine room.
Get the thrusters back online.
Seal the cargo bay.
You two with me.
My dear people! I hear your cries and feel your anger.
And therefore, by your command, I send these creatures where they belong.
Straight to hell! Straight to hell! Straight to hell! Straight to hell! Straight to hell! [SPEAKING DRUIDIC LANGUAGE.]
Begone, you unclean beasts! [WHOOSHING.]
Come on, Johnny.
You know what you need to do.
- Oh, bollocks.
Run, run.
What have you done? I've used your own magic against you.
We may be kin, but we are not the same.
Now, you may not agree with my methods, but I will always protect my people.
Now, the question is, Ms.
Wu, what shall we do about your disloyalty? Uh, maybe I lose my snack room privileges for a week.
Oh, no! Not my almonds! Oh, I wouldn't worry about your almonds.
Because as I'm sure you've heard, Gary Green is all the man you need.
Now, gaze into the nipple.
Wolfie! Now! What's a Wolfie? [RUMBLING.]
W-W-W-Wolfie? [SNARLS.]
I knew you could exploit fear to make yourself even more powerful.
Well, it looks like you taught this old dog some new tricks after all.
But now I'm gonna use those new tricks to strike you down.
You know, I do have a few tricks of my own.
We're running on very low reserve power.
The odds of us successfully pushing through the avalanche above us are 3,720 to 1.
Never tell me the odds, Gideon.
Everyone hold on tight.
Oh, this better work.
It will.
- You got Wicksty? - Yeah, I'm not letting go.
Come on, come on.
- Boom! - Whoo! Yes! All systems are back online, Captain.
Fantastic, Gideon.
Now let's go find Constantine and Ray.
Oh, damn executive privacy button.
Uh, hey.
Can you do me a solid and press that button over there, if you [SNARLS.]
Do you really think I'm letting you get out of here alive? - [YELPS.]
- [ROARS.]
Help! Get away from him, you beast! [ALL GRUNTING.]
What happened? I don't know.
But I'm guessing he had something to do with it.
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
It may be too late to save Ray or Desmond or the Legends.
But at least I'll get to send you back where you belong.
Oh, you bastards.
You did it.
You bloody survived.
I've never been so happy to be wrong in my life.
Don't do it, John.
Don't kill him.
Don't give up on Haircut.
What are you gonna do, Johnny? You're all out of moves.
No, I'm not.
I'll see you lovely lot at the end.
I'm gonna save Ray.
The magic-o-meter's picking up strange activity on the ground.
Tabitha, show yourself.
So wonderful to be back.
Brimstone was so awful for my complexion.
Oh, but you look ravishing, my love.
Hold on.
Is he kissing Oh, the Fairy Godmother.
Is that tongue? More singing.
We're so screwed.
Come with me, my pet.
Let's find you a new host.
It's his nipple.
He tried to hypnotize Mona with his nipple.
His nipple? [GASPS.]
Neron gave you back your nipple which became bad in hell, which is now poisoning your mind and making you evil, and that's why you came back to the Time Bureau So that you could nip-notize everyone - and Neron could take over.
- Yeah.
You will do no more harm with your nipple! - [SCREAMS.]
No, no, no, no! No, no, please no! [SCREAMING.]
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
It wasn't me.
It was my nipple.
I swear.
Save me! As you wish.
You have to go.
Tell the Legends what's going on.
- Wait, what about you? - I'm not leaving Mona behind.
Always knew you were a team player.
You okay? It's a long story, but Gary took over the Bureau.
He nip-notized everyone.
Yeah, you're gonna have to explain that.
The germ turned.
Well, it's not just him.
It's Neron and The Fairy Godmother, Tabitha.
She's Tabitha? Yeah, you missed a lot.
And Ray is still in hell.
I know he hasn't given up, so we're not gonna give up on him.
Now, let's do this for Ray.
Bloody hell.

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