Erky Perky (2006) s03e08 Episode Script

Soldier Bugged

Life was good
on Hot Dog stand ♪
For two bugs
with food demands ♪
Had our last meal
one sunny day ♪
They got caught
up and swept away ♪
Into Kitchen's
where they landed ♪
We're so hungry ♪
And we're stranded ♪
Finding food is
quite a mission ♪
Other bugs are competition ♪
Now, just one question ♪
How do we find our
way back home? ♪
- Perky.
- Catch.
- (laughs) Got it! Catch Erky.
- (laughs) To you, from me.
- Got it, got it
- Were you never told?
Don't play with your food.
- [Erky And Perky] Aww.
- A magnificent crumb, for
your master kay-ten Margaret
- (crunches) Bad luck, boys.
(sinister laughter)
- I've said it over and
over, Perky, seize the crumb.
- [Frenzel] Attention!
(marching music)
- What's that?
- Left, left, left right left.
- Hey, Perky.
- Oh, (giggles) hi you, Sajuica.
- Aren't these soldier
bugs cool, Perky?
- [Soldier Bugs] Hut! Hut! Hut!
- Who would want to
be a silly soldier?
- Um
- [Soldier Bugs] Hut! Hut! Hut!
(smacks baton loudly)
- Gah!
- First troop! Present arms!
- General, your first
troop of soldiers,
ready to go, sir!
(teeth chattering)
- Your crumb, Sergeant Frenzel.
- Thank you, sir.
- (gasp) Perky, crumbs.
- And there'll be another
bag of crumbs for you
when the next troop
is ready to go.
- The next troop is
nearly ready, sir.
- Very good, Sergeant.
- Very good, sir.
Troop, salute.
- Ooh,
- Quick, march.
(marching music)
- Alright, Frenzel, confess.
What's with all the
muscle bound bugs?
And more to the point,
what's with all the crumbs?
- Step up, Erky.
Your once-in-a-lifetime
chance to join the Bug Army.
And, every bug who joins gets
all the crumbs they can eat.
- Crumbs!
How do we get involved
- All you have to do is
complete the training course
and pass the fitness test.
- Oh, we're already trained.
We'll just skip to the test.
(marching music)
- Alright, here's the drill.
The Bug Army is about fitness,
agility, and teamwork.
- And crumbs. When do we eat?
- Quiet in the ranks!
In the Bug Army, you
don't eat anything,
don't do anything,
don't even breathe
unless I say so.
- Yes, yes, all
very well, Frenzel.
But when do we get our crumbs?
- Alright, you no-hopers,
fitness test stage one.
Packs on.
- (gasps for air)
Can I breathe now?
- And, Go!
- [Soldier Bugs] Hut! Hut! Hut!
- Come on, Perky.
- You go, Erky. Go!
[Soldier Bugs] Hut! Hut! Hut!
- Oh, come on, tip!
No, Perky.
How this works is-
- Go Erky, go.
- [Soldier Bugs] Hut! Hut! Hut!
- No!
(spring sound)
Sorry, Erky.
- Yeesh!
- Fitness test, stage two.
The Pool of Pitiless Punishment.
- [Soldier Bugs] Hut! Hut! Hut!
Hut! Hut! Hut!
- Oh this is easy peasy, Perky.
- I'm not so sure, Erky.
- Just jump, Perky. Jump.
Swing, Perky, Swing.
(water splashes)
- Okay, troops. This is your
final chance to pass the test.
The Stack of Pain.
- [Soldier Bugs] Hut! Hut! Hut!
Hut! Hut! Hut! Push.
Hut! Hut! Hut! Push.
Hut! Hut! Hut!
- Your mission is to get this
load to the top of the stack,
and drop it into the cup below.
(laughs) Go!
- [Soldier Bugs]
Hut! Hut! Hut! Push.
- Pull, Perky. Pull!
- I am pulling, Erky.
- [Soldier Bugs] Hut!
Hut! Hut! Push, Hut!
Hut! Hut! Hut!
(all gasp)
Hut! Hut! Hut!
- [Perky] One more
big push, Erky.
(ominous music)
- Quick, Perky.
- I did it, Erky. I did it.
- No, No.
(plates crashing and breaking)
- Well done, troops.
Somehow, you've all
passed the fitness test.
Time to ship out on active duty.
- Now hold on, Frenzel.
You said every bug that passed
the test got free crumbs.
- [Soldier Bugs] Yeah!
- And we want our crumbs now.
- You get your crumbs
when you start to fight.
- Erky, what did
he mean by fight?
- It's just a bit of
hand-to-hand combat against
the giant adhorts
out there in garden.
(everyone gasps)
- But you said
this Army thing was
all about eating not fighting.
- It's just a little
bit of fighting
- Look, if being in the
Army is about fighting,
well then we're an
Army against fighting.
- [Soldier Bugs] Yeah.
- And we'll fight for
our right not to fight.
- [Soldier Bugs] Yeah.
- Okay, Frenzel,
hand us those crumbs.
- Crumbs? What crumbs?
(laughs) Gotta run.
- Come back here, you!
After him!
(exciting chase music)
- [Soldier Bugs] Hut! Hut! Hut!
- Come on, Perky.
He's getting away.
- Ooh, ow!
- [Soldier Bugs] Hut! Hut! Hut!
- Hmm.
- Come back here, you deserter.
- Aw.
- [Soldier Bugs] Hut! Hut! Hut!
- Oh no!
- Ooh!
- Grab some crumbs,
Perky, quick.
- Ooh! This one's
a beauty, Erky.
- Come on, throw it to me.
- Catch.
- (laughs) Don't
play with your food.
- Aw
- How many times do I
have to remind you, Perky?
Seize the crumb.
- It's not my seizing,
it's my throwing.
- What you need,
is some training.
- No, not more training.
- Like we used to say in the
old days, no pain, no gain.
(upbeat music)
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