Fantastic Four (2006) s01e14 Episode Script

Revenge of the Skrulls

Begin.
It's clobbering time! Flame on! You cannot defeat my invisible force fields.
(SCREAMS) I will stop you.
Pathetic.
Soon Earth and all of the galaxy will belong to the Skrulls.
No.
Remember our deal, Skrull.
Destroy the rest of the Fantastic Four, but the Human Torch belongs to me.
I will have my revenge.
And only then will I give you what you need.
Of course, Ronan.
Flame on! Flame Flame (PEOPLE CHATTERING) MAN: Check out their costumes.
You're stepping on my cape.
I love you, Johnny.
JOHNNY: Wait a minute, we're doing what? I have been telling you about this for weeks.
Look, just smile and wave.
And don't burn anything down.
Thank you all for coming to Be A Fantastic Fifth For a Day.
On behalf of the Fantastic Four, we welcome you to the Baxter Building.
The winner of today's contest will get to spend a day with the team.
Did she go crazy? Is that it? Why would she do this? A little goodwill never hurt anyone, Johnny.
After all, the city sometimes takes the brunt of our more destructive adventures.
What, we tore up the city a little so now we gotta make nice? Great.
Well, if there's one thing I love, it's parading around like a giant freak for people.
I love you, man.
I think that kid glued rocks all over himself.
Maybe he wants to be your sidekick.
The Thing and Boulder Boy.
Stretch, am I going nuts, or are there a dozen sets of twins out there? And is that a leprechaun? And not only that, but the winner will receive Reed? Johnny, the leprechaun.
Get him.
Oh, sweet.
Flame on! (PEOPLE EXCLAIMING) (CROWD CHEERING) Sorry.
Susan, we need to conference for a moment.
Be right back, folks.
What are you doing? You're ruining my contest.
The crowd has been infiltrated with Skrulls.
- So? - What do you mean, "So"? We knew they'd be back.
This could be the start of an invasion.
Good, because this contest? (RAZZING) Boring! Ow! It is not.
Honestly, Reed.
Can we talk about it tonight? I'm right in the middle of this.
No, my show's on tonight.
If we have to stop an invasion, let's do it now.
It's an alien invasion! True, but it's just that the Skrulls, well, they're kind of dumb.
That may be the case, but we still have to take this seriously.
- The contest is over.
- What? Hallelujah! Reed, I put weeks of work into this contest.
We have to do this.
Fine.
- You, you win.
- Yes! Yes! Congratulations.
Now, everyone, go home.
(PEOPLE CHATTERING) Wasn't that great, folks? Thanks for coming.
See you next year.
RUPERT: My name is Rupert.
You are Susan Storm, middle name unknown.
AKA, the Invisible Woman.
Date of birth Stop.
Rupert, you need to go home.
We'll mail you your prize.
Fish.
- BEN: Lobby seems awfully crowded.
- Yes, it does.
Let's regroup upstairs.
Head for the elevators.
Remember that time when all the buildings got sucked underground by the Mole Man? That was sweet.
Okay, you need to Susan, the Skrulls are in the building.
We have to move.
RUPERT: Fantastic.
This is going to be great.
Do I get my own module in the Fantasticar? You know what you guys don't have, power-wise? Magic! I should be the magic guy.
Guys, I'm not feeling too well, like I picked up a bad case of giant dweeb-itis.
There's no such thing as magic.
Now, the Skrulls are Hey, Thing! Do you remember that time the Hulk beat you up? That was sweet.
Can this thing go any faster? Remember that time he switched minds with you, Mr.
Fantastic? That was sweet.
HERBIE: Dr.
Richards, there's been a deep-space alert.
What? When? Well, right now.
And it's more like an already-here alert.
(BEEPING) Do I get a code name? How about the Enchanter? Look! It's a vindicator-class, mark-seven Skrull command ship.
There's only six in the whole Skrull fleet! Didn't we leave you inside? And how on Earth could you know that? Dude.
Everyone knows that.
It's all over the Internet.
Fantastic Four.
You will surrender to the Skrull Empire! What is the meaning of this invasion? What do you want with Earth? There is a war going on, Reed Richards.
My people have been fighting the Kree for thousands of years.
- And now - Is this gonna be a long story? Silence! Your planet is in a strategic location, but this is no invasion.
See, you canceled the contest for nothing.
No.
The invasion comes later.
What the Skrulls came to see was the final defeat of the Fantastic Four.
It's Fantastic Five today, alien.
And no one has ever beaten us.
Talk time's over, pal, now it's clobbering (LAUGHING) Dude, that was so sweet.
Watch out, he's right behind you.
- Wow! Remember when - SUZY: Rupert! (SUZY GRUNTS) JOHNNY: Sue! Oh, don't worry, Human Torch.
You won't be hurt.
There are plans for you.
Stay away from my friends.
I've been training for months, studying the four of you.
I've fought this fight 1,000 times in simulation.
Then why haven't you beaten me yet? Because I want to savor the experience.
(CROWS CAWING) This is the best.
They're gonna wake up and escape, and then you'll have to fight again, and we will find some new way to beat you, maybe with a new invention.
It's gonna be sweet.
We shall see.
Yeah, yeah, kid, I know.
A scary monster.
Now, if you'll excuse me, I got some aliens to go beat up.
Yeah, and the Thing is probably gonna come smashing in, and he'll save the day.
I wonder where Johnny is.
He probably escaped and he's coming to rescue us.
He's their new member? That's what the commander said.
- You just wait and see, this is gonna be - Rupert! Listen to me.
We're in very serious trouble, you know that, right? Totally! This is the sweetest prize ever.
A role-playing adventure with the Fantastic Four! It all seems so real.
Rupert, this is real.
We're not making this up.
The prize was just a uniform, I think, not this.
There's an 84.
7% chance we're not going to survive this.
But you brought up a good point earlier.
I wonder why they would separate Johnny from us.
Hello! Anyone home? Man, this thing itches.
Hey, is anyone listening? Can I get a soda, or my powers turned back on? Jonathan Spencer Storm.
Long have I waited for this day.
My revenge on the Fantastic Four is at hand.
And you, especially, will suffer for what you've done.
Do I know you? - What? - Well, you look sort of familiar, but I can't place you.
I'm really bad with faces.
You lie! Surely you remember our battle inside the Arena of Judgment.
Your heroics caused me to be banished forever from the Kree Empire.
- CROWD: Johnny! Johnny! Johnny! - Johnny! Johnny! Johnny! Oh, yeah.
Oh, wait.
No, I don't.
Oh, no! Why? Why is this happening? Please don't hurt me! You wear the uniform of the Four.
Surely you are braver than this.
I'm not.
I'm not! I don't even think he has superpowers.
Report.
Have they found the Thing yet? Still searching, Commander.
Clearly you used our DNA to transform yourself into a super warrior, which is brilliant, by the way, but why only you? Silence, human! Why not create an army of Super-Skrulls? You would have taken over Earth easily.
Enough! The human raises an excellent point, Commander.
Why have you not released the secret behind your powers? How dare you question me! I am commander of this army, chosen by the Empress herself.
Carry on with the dissections.
And put a gag on Mr.
Fantastic.
It was just a simple question.
RONAN: You must remember me.
Ronan, the Grand Accuser of the Kree empire.
So, you're not the Mole Man.
No, for the last time! I've sacrificed everything, allied myself with Skrulls, all to take my revenge on you! And you don't remember me? You'd be surprised how many blue people we meet.
Okay, what were you wearing when we met? Maybe that will help.
You ha ve what you want, Kree, now uphold your end of the bargain.
Give me the genetic keys so that I can create more Super-Skrulls.
How dare you make demands of me, K'lrt? Without my science, you would be powerless.
I created the Super-Skrull! Quiet, Ronan.
If m y men learn of our alliance, they'll destroy both of us.
(RUMBLING) Oh, that was so sweet.
What took you so long? Hey, it's rush hour.
Give me a break.
Reed, I couldn't see, I couldn't hear, I didn't know where I was.
You may have been happier not knowing.
SUZY: Yeah, I think you're right.
You, okay, pipsqueak? They didn't switch out your brain or anything? Thank you, thank you.
I don't want to be a Fantastic Fifth.
I quit.
I want to go home.
That won't be happening.
Do we have a plan, or are we just making it up as we go? We need to find Johnny.
We'll need his power if this turns into a full invasion.
Destroy them! But for right now, duck! You just broke all your teeth, didn't you? Wait! I can't go out there.
I'm afraid of heights.
Fear of heights is irrational.
It's much more accurate to say you have a fear of falling.
Come on, Suzy, last one down has to clean all this up.
Okay, one, I am not cleaning this up, and two, any thoughts on surviving this? He beat us pretty easily last time.
Is there any way you can just take me home before he wipes you all out? Skrull! Answer me.
What's going on? Hey, blue guy, thanks for shooting off my collar.
And as for what's going on, you're about to get your butt kicked.
Whoever you are.
We're ready for you this time, chump.
Do I even want to know? No, it was nasty.
You cannot win, it is as simple as that.
I have mastered your powers, I have studied your patterns, there is nothing you can do that I am not prepared for.
Hey, hey, wait up.
I want to get to know you better.
A Kree! - Alert the commander.
- No.
Ronan the Accuser? It doesn't make sense.
The Kree and Skulls are enemies.
Why would Dude! It's a supervillain team-up.
This is so sweet! JOHNNY: Missed.
Now, seriously, don't tell me, did we meet at a party? Are you from the Negative Zone? You a friend of Dr.
Doom's? I will grind your bones to dust! Ronan, you fool, you ruin everything.
I'm the fool? The genetic key to recreating your powers was destroyed when the Human Torch escaped.
You Skrull imbecile! No.
All of this for nothing? We were right in the middle of something, pal.
That's it, isn't it? The reason you don't have an army of Super-Skrulls is because you don't know how.
You need Ronan to do it.
You need Kree science.
Quite a price to pay, working with such a hated enemy.
I wonder if the rest of the Skrulls will understand.
That sounds like a no.
Can I take a nap now? Guess not.
Flame on! (CROWS CAWING) SUZY: Reed! Ben, now.
So ends the Fantastic Four.
(LAUGHING DEMONICALLY) It's Fantastic Five today, Super-Skrull.
What are you waiting for? Destroy them! Explain the Kree commander.
- How dare you imply - Hey.
Hey, I know you.
I saw you on the video phone with that blue guy.
I don't know what a Kree is, but I saw you guys talking.
You will pay for this.
Especially you, Human Torch.
Me? Why is it always me? Stinks to be him.
BEN: Well, that wasn't fun.
Why do all these aliens hate me? I'm awesome.
I don't get it.
Rupert, you And I can't believe I'm saying this You saved us.
Thank you.
But how did you know how to work Ronan's weapon? I've got the Ronan action figure.
It comes with the universal weapon.
I've trained with it, extensively.
Well, I'm sorry your special day was ruined, Rupert.
How about you come back and we can try it again? - No! - No! Yes! That was totally sweet.
It was kind of like that time when Annihilus showed up, but cooler.
That was sweet.
And like that one time