Gilmore Girls s04e03 Episode Script
The Hobbit, the Sofa, and Digger Stiles
You know what's great|about you going off to college? My newfound independence? No.
My new batch|of youth-oriented catalogs.
For example, where on earth could I put this fabulous purple-flowered rug? It's so young and cool,|but doesn't really go with my room, so My room.
The matching beanbag chair|arrives next week.
I love it when you miss me.
It's not that.
|It's just since you've been gone I finally realized how the living room|stayed so clean.
- What do you think?|- It works.
- Thank you.
|- You're welcome.
Sookie sent marshmallow cookies Luke sent muffins and I got you a copy of|the "Stars Hollow Gazette.
" You don't have to bring that.
I subscribed.
You subscribed to|the "Stars Hollow Gazette?" The editor does not subscribe to|the "Stars Hollow Gazette.
" - I don't want to get cut off from the town.
|- That's very sweet of you.
Want to grab some coffee|before I head back? - Can't.
|- Why? - It's shopping week.
|- Isn't it always? The first week of school|is called shopping week.
You get to try as many classes|as you want before you pick the ones|you want to stick with.
I picked over 50 classes|I'm gonna try out plus another 10 I'm gonna squeeze in|if I have time.
They all sound completely amazing.
|I stayed up all night reading the class subscriptions|over and over.
You do know|that if you weren't so pretty you would've had|the crap kicked out of you every day.
- Walk me out?|- Because you need the protection.
What time is your first class? You know, soon.
What? You're not gonna rush to your first class|and get there an hour early? - No.
|- You are.
- I am not.
|- When you started elementary school you told me the teacher wanted|to meet all the parents at 6:30 and when we got there,|the school wasn't open yet.
- I did that once.
|- No, you got away with it once.
- You tried it every year.
|- I'm not gonna be early.
If you took all the time|you wasted being early for things - What?|- My mother was here.
- What?|- My mother.
She was here.
I can feel it.
Grandma hasn't been here.
- Smell that?|- Smell what? The room.
|It smells like guilt and Chanel No.
5.
- I'm telling you, you're wrong.
|- You put the coffee table like that? No.
I have three other roommates.
|One of them probably did it.
Three roommates?|When did the other one come? - Last night.
Her name's Janet.
|- What's she like? - She jogs.
Come on, let's go.
|- You seriously don't smell that? We can get one cup of coffee,|then I have to get to class.
- I knew you were early.
|- I'm not that early.
Freshmen.
- Sign and date.
|- Signing and dating.
Do you have your last check stub? Yeah.
Here.
Remember that? Income.
Those were the days.
Okay, my hand is cramping,|and I'm done signing now.
Sookie, can you hand me|that screwdriver? Hey, tomorrow we have to meet|with Ted Oldaman and get our liability insurance instated|before we can break ground on the inn.
That reminds me Tom sent over|the initial proposal for the work.
- How much?|- I'll tell you later.
- When?|- After you blow.
Come on.
Once you have the baby,|then you can have the cow.
Okay, I think I got it.
- Is it really that much?|- Here, I'm going in the nursery.
It's $20,000 more than we thought.
$20,000? That sucks.
- I got the chimney report back.
|- Shoot.
- Hello?|- What is that? Jackson.
He's trying to hook up|the house's central sound system to the baby monitor.
I'm in the baby's room.
I repeat, I am in the baby's room.
|Copy that? This is probably the cutest creepy thing|he has done yet.
Can anyone hear me?|I repeat.
Can anyone hear me? - Yes, Jackson!|- You're supposed to use the walkie-talkie.
Roger, Jackson.
|We're receiving some feedback.
I repeat, we're receiving some feed- - Hello? Sookie?|- Jackson, I'm receiving feed- Do you hear me? Sookie? Yes, I can hear you.
Sookie, just tell me if you can hear me.
Jackson, I can hear I can hear you just fine! This system's gonna work great.
Why aren't you using the walkie-talkie? - It's not working.
|- Here.
- You know, I have a thought.
|- Yes? Well, obviously it's gonna take some time to get|the inn up and running, right? And until we do we have absolutely no money|coming in whatsoever.
So it's a happy thought.
What do you think about starting|a catering company? - A catering company?|- Yeah.
You could plan the events,|decorations, themes, and I can cook.
It wouldn't be for very long,|just until the baby came.
- Yes, but-|- Okay, here.
Sookie, I'm not really a party planner.
|I've never done that.
What are you talking about? You put on all those beautiful weddings|at the inn.
And the conventions.
|The men in the hats and the buttons.
Yes, but I had a staff at the inn,|and I had resources.
Come on.
|It'll be so fun to work together again.
- Just think about it.
|- Fine, I'll think about it.
Good.
How long do I have to think about it? - About a week.
|- Sookie.
Helen Thompson's son, Aaron,|is having a birthday party and she asked me to cater.
I suggested that you plan it.
|She thought it was a fabulous idea.
So she offered us the job,|and I just took it.
It's Thursday.
She wanted to do it|on Aaron's actual birthday.
I thought that was so sweet.
|Helen's like that, you know? Yes, I know.
I can call her right now and tell her no,|if that's what you want.
I mean it.
You say the word, and it's off.
Maybe we could just try this one,|just to see if you like it.
Maybe.
Okay, Sookie,|can you hear me now? Hello.
Jackson, I can hear you.
- Use the monitor!|- Sorry! - Russian economics sucks.
|- I will make a note.
Tanna? - Tanna.
|- What? - Where did this come from?|- What? This.
The furniture,|the couch, the chairs, the rug.
I don't know.
|It must have been here when I got back.
Hello? I was going to wait until you called me,|but my life isn't as long as yours.
- Did you sit on the couch?|- The couch? I didn't want to get it too soft, I knew you'd be studying there and watching|television and you'd need a little support.
You did this? Of course I did it.
|My granddaughter's a Yalie now.
She needs to live like a Yalie.
But how? When? I snuck in yesterday|when you were in classes just to measure to make sure|everything would fit.
Then I had to butter up|your dippy freshman counselor so she'd let the movers in.
Did you look in|the entertainment center yet? No.
That's a plasma TV with|a VCR and a DVD player.
There's also a five-CD changer|and a turntable and the whole thing is wired|in 5.
1 Surround Sound.
I have no idea what that means,|but the man who installed it said to get Pink Floyd's|Dark Side of the Moon.
It's supposed to be amazing.
Grandma, this is all really sweet,|but I have roommates.
This might make them|a little uncomfortable.
Uncomfortable about what? This is a common room.
|It is common to all of us.
There are four of us|who live here together.
The common room, it's|what we all have in common.
Just show them how to use the remote.
|They'll be fine with everything.
Grandma, I worry|that by you giving me all these things it kind of makes it my room.
- Exactly.
|- What? Never underestimate the value of|the upper hand, Rory.
You are in the real world now.
|Status matters.
Your grandfather|and I are very proud of you.
Enjoy the furniture.
|We'll see you on Friday.
Okay, see you Friday.
My grandmother broke into our room|and furnished it.
Did she put that fireplace in, too? No, Tanna, the fireplace was always Why don't we take a little tour of|the place, okay? Great! They burnt my fries,|forgot to give me extra BBQ sauce the Jeep is making|a crunchy sound again and I gotta spend my evening making|elf ears for Aaron's "Lord of the Rings" party.
Grandma broke in to my dorm|and redid the entire common room in $25,000 worth of furniture|and stereo equipment.
You win.
It's unbelievable.
|You should see this place.
I feel like I'm in Uday's house.
Okay, tell me the whole story.
I came home,|and all the normal furniture was gone and all this stuff was in here.
What did your roommates say? Tanna doesn't know she's at Yale,|Paris saw it and said nothing.
So that's coming.
Janet's jogging.
|I don't know what she thinks but I have to hope she's pleased 'cause the girl's in shape|and can kick my butt.
Make sure something she likes is|on TV when she gets home.
Something soothing to runners.
Maybe something|that goes in a circle over and over.
This is bad.
|This is a totaI invasion of privacy.
I know.
She didn't even ask.
|She got rid of everything that was here.
What if some furniture belonged|to someone who wanted it? I don't know what she was thinking.
She was thinking, "Rory's life, mine.
"Must cover with chenille.
" I can't believe she did this.
- Yes, you can.
|- Excuse me? Come on, it's my mother.
|It's Emily Gilmore.
This is what she does.
You've seen her pull stunts|like this on me before.
That was you.
I said when you borrowed money from her,|this is what you'd get.
- I can't believe you're gloating.
|- I'm not.
I'm just saying,|when you sleep with dogs you wake up|with an entertainment center.
So what do I do? You could say,|"Grandma, this furniture is very nice.
"I appreciate the gesture,|but this is a dorm room "and I cannot guarantee|that the other people "will love it as much as I do.
"I worry about expensive equipment|getting stolen "and it's just too much right now.
" - That sounds good.
|- Okay.
Then my mother will say,|"Rory, your grandfather "and I are paying for you to go to Yale.
"We are enabling you to have|this rarefied education "you're being ungrateful|and small-minded, and I resent it.
"I am hurt on a leveI|you won't understand "until you yourself have a daughter|or a granddaughter "who will cut your heart out|the way you've just cut mine out "and I hope that small veneer|of independence "that you've extracted from this incident "is worth the total alienation|of the grandparents "who have done nothing but love you|and thought of you only.
" Or I could keep the furniture.
Yes, you could.
This is great.
Hon, seriously, if you feeI strongly,|say something.
I just want you to be prepared, that's all.
I know.
Take heart in knowing,|when it comes to controlling a person my mother targeted my soul,|my independence and my entire future,|and at least with you she threw in an ottoman.
Emily? I'm home.
I keep wanting to give this room|a little spruce but for the life of me every one of these fabrics|gives me a headache.
- What do you think of this one?|- It's fine.
That's just the sort of enthusiasm|I was looking for.
Emily, you have excellent taste.
I'm sure whichever one you pick|will look lovely.
- Do you need some ice?|- No.
A taller glass.
- You sound tired.
|- It's been a very long day.
You know, some men retire.
Yes, and some men tattoo|their mothers' names on their biceps.
I don't think the two are|necessarily linked.
I'm fine, Emily.
I just need a drink and a nice meal,|and I'll be good as new.
You got a call from Jason Stiles today.
Digger Stiles? What did he want? - To talk to you.
|- I have nothing to say to him.
He might have something|interesting to tell you.
What? That the turncoat company|I used to work for is cutting my pension? The stock they gave me when|they unceremoniously forced me out has been rescinded? Yes.
That, or hello.
He's probably been sent to do|his father's dirty work.
It's not enough to fire me.
They have to continue to harass me|now that I'm gone.
I thought you always liked Digger.
Yes, I liked Digger|when he was fetching my coffee.
I liked Digger when he was refilling|my stapler.
But I do not like Digger now that he is his father's heir apparent|and sent to annoy me.
I certainly don't understand|why you defend him.
I'm not defending him.
- If you don't want to return his call, don't.
|- Thank you.
I invited him over tomorrow.
|You can find out what he wants then.
You did what? He was absolutely insistent|that he talk to you.
- Why would you do that?|- It was the polite thing to do.
If you don't want him|to come over, I have his number.
You may call and disinvite him.
|It's up to you.
Fine, he can come over,|but he's not staying for a drink.
He can come in and deliver|his message and then leave.
Whatever you say.
That's it.
No drink, no handshake, nothing.
I'll even hide the liquor bottles|so he doesn't get any bright ideas.
It's really comforting to|have such a supportive wife in times like these.
I'm so glad.
- Did you hear?|- Hear what? The first party of the year|is going to be on our floor.
Technically, it's to celebrate|the first week of classes but I'm anticipating the themes|quickly degenerating to: "Walking works, let's drink.
" The important thing is that the first party|is going to be on our floor.
- Our floor.
|- Yes, our floor.
The way it works is|that anyone who wants to be a part of the party|will just leave their door open so people can just wander in and out.
- What do you think?|- About what? Leaving our door open? It's the perfect opportunity|to solidify our social standing at Yale.
It'll guarantee invitations|to every other party thrown this year and we'll get our faces in people's heads.
I don't know.
What don't you know?|I've explained it all to you.
I'm not sure I want to leave our door open|to strangers.
They won't be strangers|once they come in and say howdy.
I'm not sure how I'll feel that night.
- I might be tired.
|- For God's sake, Grandpa, you're 18.
Sleep when you're dead.
We can still go to the party.
We can meet people,|you can solidify your social status get your face in people's heads,|and I can bail when I want.
Going isn't the same.
Going is passive.
Opening your door,|you are giving the party.
You're responsible for the fun.
|People owe you.
- Don't you want people to owe you?|- I'm good, actually.
Sure, you're good.
You're fine.
After all, you have all this fancy furniture|and a big TV to lord over people.
It's the rest of us who are screwed.
The ones whose grandparents|hadn't thought to provide suck-up furniture.
- This is not suck-up furniture.
|- You're being selfish.
You don't care about anybody|but yourself.
No.
I hate college! Okay, we've got costumes,|cutouts, rings, ladies and gentlemen we've got fairy necklaces, tree heads.
I'm picking up|table decorations tomorrow.
Do you need me to order|a "Lord of the Rings" cake? - The cake is under control.
|- Okay, cake's off my list.
- So you've got the menu going, right?|- Yes.
Festive kiddie food like bagel dogs,|Tater Tots, mini pizzas, mac and cheese.
You know what would be great?|Those colored popcorn balls.
- Rory used to go mental over those things.
|- How many adults are gonna be there? - Probably about 10.
|- Okay.
- Hi.
|- Hey.
Okay, so I've scoured the entire store,|and here's what we got.
Hit me.
Horn of Gondor, Legolas' bow, and a cape.
Cape for who? There are 4,000 people|in that movie who wear capes.
- Wow, you're crabby.
|- I wore a bracelet to school today.
My parents were called.
There was a special service in chapel,|and I've been ordered to a soul-searching seminar next week.
I'll be sitting between|the nail-polish-wearing girl and the spicy-condiment user.
- I'm sorry.
|- That's okay.
Leave the horn, the bow, and the bill.
Right.
- Hello?|- I need to talk to you about Rory.
Paris? She's not adjusting well.
|I'm concerned about her.
The socialization process in college is|vitally important.
The connections we make|can last a lifetime.
They can alter our future.
|That's how important they are.
It must be tempting to|emotionally stunt your daughter so she'll return home, take care of you in your old age,|but don't you want better for her? Paris, did something happen|between you and Rory? She won't open the door for the party.
There's a party on our floor,|if you open your door you get to be a part of it,|but she won't open it because she's busy|being Heidi's grandfather.
- If you were a real mother-|- Paris, you called my mother? - You wouldn't listen to me.
|- Give me that phone.
- Hello?|- Hi, honey, how's school? I'm rooming with a Stephen King novel.
What's she talking about? Just some ridiculous party.
|I don't want to let a million strangers traipse through my room,|so she's having a meltdown.
- Sorry she bothered you.
|- That's okay.
I'm gonna kill her.
Remember, you cut off one head,|she'll grow another.
Tell me about the party.
It's just a first-week-of-class kind of thing.
- You going?|- Maybe.
It might not be such a bad idea to get to know the people|in your building see who's gonna have|the emergency Pop-Tarts on hand.
- I'll get to know them.
|- A party might be a fun way to do it.
Are you telling me to let Paris|open the door to the world? I'm not telling you anything.
I want to make sure|that at the end of four years you've not only read|every book in the library you've also had some fun.
I will have fun.
I can see you the night of the party|holing up in your room with a book the entire evening.
You know when I do that,|I'm not hiding.
I enjoy it.
And I'm making friends.
|You saw me make friends.
I know, but I'm not just talking|about making friends.
I'm talking about experiencing things.
Parties, football games,|protests, barn burnings.
Very big amongst the kids these days.
Those are all experiences.
Maybe dumb experiences,|but you never know when you're accidentally gonna|stumble across something that could be something.
Fine, I'll open the door.
- Yes.
|- This isn't for you! Like I care about the reason.
- You might have fun.
|- Yeah.
- Call me later.
|- If I don't, I'm sure Paris will.
- Tell her thanks for me.
|- I will not! - What do you think?|- What is that? You said I could borrow something to|wear to the party.
Yeah, I did, but that's my Chilton uniform.
My mom probably threw it in for a joke.
It's my high-school uniform.
|I wore it every day to You know,|there's a tie in there that goes with it.
Okay, I've scoped out|the other open rooms and no one seems to have copped|a clear identity yet which leaves the field wide open.
|What should we be? We've got a lot of seating,|so we could be the make-out room.
We could crank the stereo up,|push the furniture aside and be the dance room.
Or we could throw down some towels|and be the keg room.
I don't want an identity.
|You already made me open the door.
We're the open-door room.
That's it.
How about some low lighting|and some candles? The meaningful-conversation room.
- No themes.
|- No one knows me here, Rory.
Do you understand what that means?|It means I can start all over.
I can wipe out the last 18 years and introduce people|to the new Paris Geller.
The fun Paris Geller.
I just want everything to be|different this year, that's all.
- One candle.
|- Thank you.
- No, seriously, give me the ring.
|- No way.
- $5.
|- No.
- Just let me hold it.
|- Forget it.
Come on.
I promise I'll give it right back,|my precious.
- I mean, Roger.
|- You're crazy.
What? You're the one|with the pointy ears, my friend.
Here we go.
I'd like you to meet Redmond|and Riley James.
Redmond, Riley, nice to meet you.
|I'm Julie, your cruise director.
I'm here to help you with your costumes.
- I want to be Legolas.
|- I want to be Gimli.
- I want to be Gimli, too.
|- Two Gimlis coming up.
- Lorelai, my hood is loose.
|- Her name's Julie, stupid.
No, it's not, retard.
She just told us her name was Julie.
- She's our cruise director.
|- What's a cruise director? - I don't know, but you fart with your face.
|- Love, guys.
Love, okay? "Lord of the Rings" is all about the love.
No.
It's about the destruction|of all mankind.
And who doesn't love that?|You're fixed.
Go play.
Lovingly.
Lorelei, some of the kids|are asking for swords.
- Did you bring swords?|- No, I didn't.
The Raymonds.
I forgot we made up.
- Will you excuse me?|- Absolutely.
Riley said only boy hobbits|can travel to Mount Doom.
Is that true? In the movie, only boy hobbits|travel to Mount Doom but that's only because|the girls went to do - something even more dangerous.
|- What? Have you ever heard of|a Brazilian bikini wax? - Lorelei.
|- Great, you're here.
So girls go on adventures, too? - And they go in heels.
|- Good.
- Are Rawley and Cheech here?|- They've been chopping for an hour.
Perfect.
There is a full house, isn't there? - You have enough costumes?|- We're good.
The screen's up, tables are set,|and four kids are crying so we're right on schedule.
I better get in the kitchen.
All right, because it's coming up|on elevenses and the hobbits are hungry, right? Right! I'm going.
- Who wants a sword?|- Me! Jason Stiles, look at you.
Look at you.
I've just got a trainer.
You have cheated God.
One minute|and you're already starting with flattery.
- I apologize.
It is lovely to see you, Emily.
|- It's lovely to see you also.
- Did you sell your soul to the devil or-|- How's your mother? - She's exactly the same.
|- And her horses? Have a better life than I do.
- Well, Richard is in his study.
|- I would expect no less.
Come in.
- Richard, there's someone here to see you.
|- Hello, Richard.
I appreciate you taking the time to do this.
I'll leave you two alone.
- Jason, say goodbye before you leave.
|- I'll do that.
- So, how have you been?|- Fine.
- May I sit?|- Your choice.
I hear your business is going well.
You hear correctly.
No reason for it not to be going well.
|You were always the best.
Is that what you came here to tell me how competent I was at my job? Nope, I came here|to make you a proposition.
- Go ahead and make it.
|- I want to be your partner.
- Excuse me?|- I want to join forces with you.
You know, put a desk in your office,|get a copy of the key maybe snag some of that fancy stationery|to write on.
- You're not serious.
|- I'm prepared to buy my way in.
I am also prepared to bring|all of my current clients and that should be appealing to you even if sharing an office|and parting with stationery is not.
Think about it.
I'd make your company|an instant contender with my youth and clients|and your reputation and respectability.
It's a pretty interesting package,|don't you think? - You want to become my partner?|- Yes.
You want to pay me|and bring a whole slew of high-paying clients with you? You keep leaving out the stationery.
Thank you for coming, Jason.
- Is something wrong?|- Yes, something's wrong.
I don't appreciate you wasting my time.
I didn't know that I was.
Am I such a joke to you|that you feel you can take my time away- I assure you, you were no joke.
You were the best|my father's company ever had.
You're right.
|I was the best the company had and now I am the best competition|they will ever have.
Not yet.
But with me, you could be.
Why would you think|I'd believe you were serious about this? When was the last time I stuck|a whoopee cushion on your chair? Your father started the company.
|He made the company.
- With you.
|- You've been there since you were a kid.
All the way through Harvard|you worked there.
You're groomed to take|that company over and now you're telling me|you want to leave? - Yes.
|- Why? Because I want to do|something on my own.
I want to work someplace|that hasn't known me since I was 6.
I'd like to get through an entire day|without being called Digger.
And I really want to piss off my dad.
- You what?|- Can you imagine his face? No, really, take a moment.
Picture it.
I walk into his office.
He's sitting|in his enormous red-leather chair.
I say, "Dad, I am leaving.
"I am taking all of my high-paying clients|with me.
"I'm getting into business|with Richard Gilmore "the man you forced out to|make room for me.
" Can you see that face? - I can see it.
|- It's a pretty good face, isn't it? It is rather satisfying.
So what do you say? You hate your father that much? I don't hate him.
|I just don't want to be him.
Jason, would you care|to join me for a drink? Gladly.
Emily, Jason's going to join us for a drink.
He is? How nice.
Would you mind if I borrowed your phone? - No.
You can use the one in my study.
|- Thank you.
I'll be right out.
So, I see your meeting went well.
It was actually very interesting.
|He wants to be my business partner.
What? What about his father|and his company? He wants to leave.
|He wants to work with the best.
- Good for Digger.
|- I always did like that boy.
- So what did you say?|- I told him I would have to think about it.
I mean, it's not as if I need anyone|working with me.
Things are going very well.
|I'm building a solid client base.
It would be nice for you|not to have to work so hard.
- I don't mind hard work, Emily.
|- I know you don't mind it.
I just said it would be nice|if you didn't have to do it.
- Jason's a very nice boy.
|- Yes, he is.
He is a very nice boy.
What are you doing? - I'm getting the tables ready.
|- They were ready.
- No, ready for the food.
|- They were ready for the food.
- No, they weren't.
|- Yes, they were.
I set them myself.
- But where were the tablecloths?|- Right here.
There.
- They're paper.
|- Yes, they are.
There's monsters on them.
They're "Lord of the Rings" characters,|which is appropriate since this is a "Lord of the Rings" party.
- So this is the table?|- Yes.
- And the paper cups and plates?|- All there on purpose.
- Thought you put them for the kids to see.
|- And use.
But the chafing dish looks so much better|on the white tablecloth.
You shouldn't have|a chafing dish out here.
Why not? A chafing dish has a candle,|and a candle has a flame a kid could stick his finger in|and get hurt.
Isn't that how they learn? - Let's heat things up in the kitchen.
|- Fine.
You made Brie.
With lavender honey|and bourbon-sugared pecans.
I thought it would go nicely|with the crudités platter.
- Tell me you made food for the kids.
|- I did make food for the kids.
These kids.
Not the Romanov kids.
I just put these in case|anyone over the age of 10 gets hungry.
- There are parents, too, you know.
|- I know.
Parents whose responsibility|it would be to keep their kid from hitting another kid or putting their fingers|under a chafing dish.
- Sookie.
|- Fine.
Having a good time?|I'm Paris Geller, Suite 5.
It's open.
It's got a candle.
|Perfect for some deep conversation.
Prepare two to five subjects to discuss so that the conversation|doesn't lag and totally ruin the vibe.
Party on.
I did a survey of all the rooms,|and by far, ours is the best.
Three is way too cluttered.
|Four has developed a weird smell.
Two was a contender|until I started telling everyone that the girl who lives there|was wait-listed.
I'm gonna get out there and mingle.
|This is a great party.
- Rory!|- My God! Madeline, Louise,|what are you doing here? Party, baby.
I thought you were supposed|to be at Mills.
No more Mills? Mills went bye-bye before|I unpacked my shoes.
- She's hanging out at Tulane with me.
|- I love New Orleans.
- I am so Southern.
|- What are you doing here? We found out where|all the first-week parties were.
- We're making the rounds.
|- We hit Harvard next.
- That's where my boyfriend goes.
|- You're dating a Harvard man? - He's gonna be a writer.
|- He hopes.
Right now,|he's freaked that "The Simpsons " will be off the air by the time|he graduates.
Good to see you guys.
|Paris is around here somewhere.
Hope she's in back of that guy there|because that's where I'm heading.
- We'll be back.
|- Good luck.
Rory Gilmore.
- Are you Rory Gilmore?|- Yes, I'm Rory Gilmore.
- Rory, what can we do with that?|- Ro-ro? - A last name can help.
|- Ro-gil? - Gil-roy?|- What are you doing? Giving you a nick.
- Do I know you?|- We get so ahead of ourselves.
I'm Kick.
I'm Mickey.
|Your grandmother told us to look you up.
- My grandmother?|- She's tight with our mom, D-A-R darling.
When she heard we were going to Yale,|she laid down the law.
- Ensure you fell in with the right crowd.
|- Which would be us.
We never settled on a nickname.
I think we're still trying|the last-first combo.
I appreciate you seeking me out,|and it was nice meeting you but I actually have to go|find my roommate.
- Do you have a middle name?|- Yes, that might help.
- What's your birthday?|- Astrological nickname.
Very in.
Seating.
Great fabric.
- This is the furniture Emily bought.
|- That woman does have taste.
- I wish she'd talk to Mom.
|- Then we wouldn't have to.
- Did Mom tell you about Christmas?|- Yes.
Hawaii.
Can't even imagine|what was going through her mind.
Walt Disney can't imagine|what was going through her mind.
You want the guy|that pumps your gas voting? That is what America is about.
- What ignorance.
|- You're the ignorant one.
I had a terrible dream the other night that everything they say|about sunscreen is true.
- I have had that dream.
|- I don't think I'm having fun.
- Party's not over yet.
|- What's with the Gabor sisters? - Friends with my grandmother.
|- Great.
Everybody has a group but me.
What are you talking about? Janet's a runner, so she'll automatically|be in the jock group.
Tanna's a freak,|so she'll be in the John Nash group.
You've got your grandmother's|obligation friends.
I'm stuck over there listening to|a bad talk-radio session.
This sucks.
We could kick everyone out|and just go to bed.
No.
I'll just have to try a little harder.
|I'm determined.
Things are going to be different this year.
Pierce my ear.
Okay, everybody out, now!|This room is closed.
Take your gross beer and your inane conversations|somewhere else.
Move! What's going on? Looks like my roommate's|kicking everybody out.
Bim and bim, up.
Let's move, now.
Sorry.
She's my roommate.
|What can I do? Call me.
Lorelei, some of the kids are starting|to get hungry.
I think we should have the food|ready to go - the minute the movie's over.
|- I agree.
I'll get right on that.
Helen wants us to put the food on.
- One step ahead of you.
|- Good.
So, what do we have here? A little lemon-garlic aioli|for the blanched veggies.
You think I should put|the assorted charcuteries - on this table or this one?|- It depends.
- Which one is the kids' table?|- There are no designated tables.
- I'm mixing and matching here.
|- Okay.
Perfect.
Right here.
- Hello, gorgeous.
What's your name?|- Oh, boy.
I'm hungry.
- Would you like some gravlax?|- Some what? - Sookie, where's the kids' food?|- Okay, you need to relax.
I haven't put the kids' food out yet.
You wouldn't let me use|the chafing dishes and I didn't want the food to get cold.
What did you just do? You just stuck that carrot in your mouth|and then put it back on the platter.
- Why would you do that?|- It tastes like diapers.
- It does not taste like diapers.
|- Honey, go sit down.
- I'll call you when dinner's ready.
|- You take it back.
Okay.
Come on.
What are you doing? - Where is it?|- Where is what? The food that doesn't taste like diapers? - You mean the kids' food?|- Yes.
Did you make any? - I'm not stupid.
|- I never said you're stupid.
I booked this gig.
|I'm the one who came to you and said: "You want to cater a kids' party with me?" Here's the children's food for|the children's birthday party, okay? - What is that?|- It's macaroni and cheese.
It's green.
Why is it green? Because I made it|with a jalapeño-chipotle cream sauce.
- Kids aren't gonna eat this.
|- When they try it- - They won't try it.
|- Why not? - Because it's green.
|- You haven't even offered it to them yet.
- They may surprise you.
|- Where is the rest of it? - The rest of what?|- The rest of the kid food.
- This is it.
|- Sookie.
- They're small.
How much can they eat?|- We talked about this.
I mentioned hot dogs|and pizza puffs and chips.
I told you to make popcorn balls.
|Where the hell are the popcorn balls? You were serious about that? Oh, my God! Is that the cake? Of course it's the cake.
You think I would go|to a birthday party without a cake? What kind of cake is it, Sookie? Chocolate with a rum-raisin,|tropical-fruit ganache.
Okay.
Cheech? Here.
Go to Doose's and get five boxes of frozen mini pizzas|and five boxes of those pigs in a blanket and all the chips you can find.
Go to Westin's, get dozens of cupcakes and have Mamie give you a couple|of big bags of jimmies.
- Chocolate, rainbow, whatever.
|- What are you doing? We'll have them decorate|their own cupcakes.
They'll love it.
Okay, go.
We're going to serve them cupcakes? Maybe they have something to|tide them over for a little while.
- I'm talking here.
|- I know.
Just relax.
It's gonna be fine.
I know it's gonna be fine,|I've been cooking all week long.
I made four different cakes|before choosing that particular one.
- So, yeah, I know it's gonna be fine.
|- But the kids won't eat that.
I'm getting tired of you telling me|what the kids won't eat.
You are supposed to plan the party,|and I'm to do the cooking.
- That's the arrangement.
|- But you have to think about the client.
I am thinking about the client.
|That cake is incredible.
Not if you're an 8-year-old.
- How do you know?|- I had an 8-year-old she hung out with other 8-year-olds my taste now is not that different|from an 8-year-old.
You can't just walk in and take over.
That's not the arrangement.
|You're not in charge here.
- We're partners.
|- I know that.
I'm a great chef.
A great chef does not have|the client decorate his own cupcakes.
- Can I have a juice box?|- We're talking! What's the matter with her? Is she sick? Why is her mouth open? - Lorelei, look at her face.
|- Hi, honey.
There's your juice.
It's grape.
Do you like grape? Me, too.
It makes your tongue all purple.
Take your juice and go watch the rest|of the movie, all right? You look very nice in your costume.
Okay, Sookie, I didn't mean|to just take over like that.
I felt a crisis coming on,|so I snapped into problem-solving mode, and I didn't think.
- I can't do this.
|- Yes, you can.
We just need to be clearer|on the menu next time.
No, not this.
This.
- Isn't it a little late?|- You saw me with that little girl.
- And her face.
I made that face.
|- You were upset.
This is not right.
This is all wrong.
I don't want to be pregnant anymore.
What are you gonna do? Walk it off? Sookie.
Where are you going? A child is not a duvet cover.
You can't just take it back|if it doesn't like you.
Luckily, duvet covers notoriously|like whoever they go home with.
They're like golden retrievers.
You know what happens|if kids don't like you? They tie you to a chair.
|They brain you with a bat.
They set fire to the house|and blame the neighbors.
You can't have kids or live next to them.
I don't know how to talk to them,|how to feed them I cover their party cloths,|and set their fingers on fire.
Just this once.
I make them eat|jalapeño-chipotle cream sauce.
- I'm Mommy Dearest.
|- Back in the kitchen.
No, I can't go back.
|I've got hummus in there.
- Come on.
|- God knows what I'll do with it.
Rawley, could you just go make sure|the kids have enough soda? Okay.
You just have to calm down.
- I can't have it.
|- Yes, you can.
No, I can't.
I'm gonna fail.
Get it out.
Stop.
Breathe.
Drink.
Everything's gonna be fine.
Kids don't like me,|and I'm not so sure I like them.
You'll like your kid.
At family gatherings,|when everyone goes to the living room gathers around, watches the kids? I read.
Jackson's sister has a little girl,|6 years old.
She likes to get up in front of the family|and sing Mariah Carey songs.
I heckle.
I have no desire to play with them.
|Easter egg hunts bore me.
I have never borrowed the neighbor's kid|to look after for the afternoon.
Good.
That's called kidnapping.
"Come on, Jackson, let's have a baby.
"I want to be a mommy.
" I'm pathetic.
- You're not pathetic.
|- I'm gonna be a bad mother.
I should not be a parent.
Sookie, look at me.
There are many people in this world|who should not have been parents.
Mr.
And Mrs.
Hitler, for example.
The Bin Ladens could have|just watched TV that night.
Richard and Emily might have|taken a pass at procreating.
You, no way.
You're gonna be a great parent.
- Yeah?|- Yeah.
- How do you know?|- Because I know you and I watched you with Rory|when she was growing up.
- Who could not like Rory?|- You're gonna be amazing.
That little boy of yours is very lucky.
Okay.
It is gonna be okay.
Yeah.
Okay.
- I'm really okay.
|- Yeah.
- Someone threw up on the table.
|- Oh, God.
I'm okay.
|I'm just gonna go over there and be - Okay.
|- Good idea.
- Hi.
|- Hi.
I'm on the floor.
- You were sleeping.
|- I have no clothes on.
No, you don't.
I'm on the floor, I have no clothes on|and you're a girl.
- So I must be|- On the wrong floor.
Oh, boy.
- Where's your room?|- I think up.
Are we on the first floor? - Yes.
|- Then up.
- Any idea how long I've been here?|- No.
So you have no idea how many people|have walked by while I - Sorry.
|- Great.
Now for the rest of my time at Yale,|I'm gonna be "the naked guy.
" - I'm sorry.
|- And you know what's really great? Tomorrow, when|"the naked guy" nickname starts spreading around campus|like wildfire I'm gonna be in my third hour|of throwing up.
It's been really quiet out here|for a while now so there's a chance that no one but me|has actually seen you yet.
- Yeah?|- I promise I won't say anything.
And if there's a chance|that you could refrain from being naked again|in the wrong hallway at the next party there's a chance you might get|a completely different nickname like "the never-naked guy.
" - You're a very kind person.
|- Wait.
Hold on.
You can borrow this.
Thanks.
Weren't you in|my Japanese fiction class today? - Yeah, that's right.
|- I thought so.
Hi, I'm Marty.
Rory.
- I won't remember that tomorrow.
|- That's perfectly understandable.
I should probably try|and find my room and my pants.
- That's where I kept my keys.
|- So pants first.
Right.
Pants first.
Night.
I'm officially stupider than my brother.
I never thought that would happen.
Hi.
- I decided I'm going to do it.
|- To do what? I'm going to go in there and I'm going to tell Grandma|that she's going to butt out of my life.
Can I? Just checking.
So you have soberly decided|to confront my mother? Yes.
- You sure you want to do this?|- Yes.
- All right, then I support you 100%.
|- Thank you.
- Wait for the right moment.
|- The right moment is now.
The right moment arrived in a big pink hat|full of feathers screaming: "Notice me because I am here! " Well, if it was wearing a hat.
- There they are.
|- Hi, Mom.
Come in.
I tell you, this day has been|an absolute circus.
I misplaced every single thing I needed.
My grocery list,|my ticket for the shoe repair.
It was a nightmare.
|What will you girls have? Wait for the moment.
Grandma, I have to talk to you|about something.
Yes, Rory, what is it? I have an announcement.
I am going into business with Jason Stiles.
Who? - You've met him, the Stiles boy.
|- Digger.
Nobody's called him Digger|in years, Lorelei.
Yes, I just got off the phone.
We're going to get together later|and hash out the details.
Richard, that is wonderful.
I didn't know you were looking|for a partner.
He wasn't.
Jason came to him.
Right.
He said he wanted to strike out|on his own he wanted to work with the best,|and he wanted to screw over his father.
- What?|- Excuse me, Rory.
You never told me about this.
I was a bit surprised at the beginning but I have to admit that when he told me that part of his motive was revenge,|I was intrigued.
No, I was tickled.
|I thought it was wonderful.
What a wonderful world we live in|that the son of my enemy hates his father,|and that I benefit from it all.
It's downright Elizabethan.
I don't think this is very funny, Richard.
No, I suppose not.
|However, I can't stop smiling.
I don't think you should go|into business with this boy.
- Now, Emily.
|- He's obviously very troubled.
You don't need to hand over|your business to a troubled youth.
He's 37 years old.
Yes.
And all he can think about is|how to get back at his father.
- I don't understand that kind of thinking.
|- You know Floyd.
He's horrible.
He is the boy's father.
He raised him.
He clothed him.
He fed him.
He does not deserve to be paid back|for all of his love and devotion like this.
- Why are you so upset?|- I don't want to talk about it anymore.
- Emily, be reasonable.
|- I never liked that Digger in the first place.
Emily, come back here.
It wasn't the right moment.
I was about to, and Grandpa came in,|he interrupted and now Grandma's mad,|so I'm sorry if it seems to you like I chickened out, but I didn't,|and now it's just gonna have to wait.
English
My new batch|of youth-oriented catalogs.
For example, where on earth could I put this fabulous purple-flowered rug? It's so young and cool,|but doesn't really go with my room, so My room.
The matching beanbag chair|arrives next week.
I love it when you miss me.
It's not that.
|It's just since you've been gone I finally realized how the living room|stayed so clean.
- What do you think?|- It works.
- Thank you.
|- You're welcome.
Sookie sent marshmallow cookies Luke sent muffins and I got you a copy of|the "Stars Hollow Gazette.
" You don't have to bring that.
I subscribed.
You subscribed to|the "Stars Hollow Gazette?" The editor does not subscribe to|the "Stars Hollow Gazette.
" - I don't want to get cut off from the town.
|- That's very sweet of you.
Want to grab some coffee|before I head back? - Can't.
|- Why? - It's shopping week.
|- Isn't it always? The first week of school|is called shopping week.
You get to try as many classes|as you want before you pick the ones|you want to stick with.
I picked over 50 classes|I'm gonna try out plus another 10 I'm gonna squeeze in|if I have time.
They all sound completely amazing.
|I stayed up all night reading the class subscriptions|over and over.
You do know|that if you weren't so pretty you would've had|the crap kicked out of you every day.
- Walk me out?|- Because you need the protection.
What time is your first class? You know, soon.
What? You're not gonna rush to your first class|and get there an hour early? - No.
|- You are.
- I am not.
|- When you started elementary school you told me the teacher wanted|to meet all the parents at 6:30 and when we got there,|the school wasn't open yet.
- I did that once.
|- No, you got away with it once.
- You tried it every year.
|- I'm not gonna be early.
If you took all the time|you wasted being early for things - What?|- My mother was here.
- What?|- My mother.
She was here.
I can feel it.
Grandma hasn't been here.
- Smell that?|- Smell what? The room.
|It smells like guilt and Chanel No.
5.
- I'm telling you, you're wrong.
|- You put the coffee table like that? No.
I have three other roommates.
|One of them probably did it.
Three roommates?|When did the other one come? - Last night.
Her name's Janet.
|- What's she like? - She jogs.
Come on, let's go.
|- You seriously don't smell that? We can get one cup of coffee,|then I have to get to class.
- I knew you were early.
|- I'm not that early.
Freshmen.
- Sign and date.
|- Signing and dating.
Do you have your last check stub? Yeah.
Here.
Remember that? Income.
Those were the days.
Okay, my hand is cramping,|and I'm done signing now.
Sookie, can you hand me|that screwdriver? Hey, tomorrow we have to meet|with Ted Oldaman and get our liability insurance instated|before we can break ground on the inn.
That reminds me Tom sent over|the initial proposal for the work.
- How much?|- I'll tell you later.
- When?|- After you blow.
Come on.
Once you have the baby,|then you can have the cow.
Okay, I think I got it.
- Is it really that much?|- Here, I'm going in the nursery.
It's $20,000 more than we thought.
$20,000? That sucks.
- I got the chimney report back.
|- Shoot.
- Hello?|- What is that? Jackson.
He's trying to hook up|the house's central sound system to the baby monitor.
I'm in the baby's room.
I repeat, I am in the baby's room.
|Copy that? This is probably the cutest creepy thing|he has done yet.
Can anyone hear me?|I repeat.
Can anyone hear me? - Yes, Jackson!|- You're supposed to use the walkie-talkie.
Roger, Jackson.
|We're receiving some feedback.
I repeat, we're receiving some feed- - Hello? Sookie?|- Jackson, I'm receiving feed- Do you hear me? Sookie? Yes, I can hear you.
Sookie, just tell me if you can hear me.
Jackson, I can hear I can hear you just fine! This system's gonna work great.
Why aren't you using the walkie-talkie? - It's not working.
|- Here.
- You know, I have a thought.
|- Yes? Well, obviously it's gonna take some time to get|the inn up and running, right? And until we do we have absolutely no money|coming in whatsoever.
So it's a happy thought.
What do you think about starting|a catering company? - A catering company?|- Yeah.
You could plan the events,|decorations, themes, and I can cook.
It wouldn't be for very long,|just until the baby came.
- Yes, but-|- Okay, here.
Sookie, I'm not really a party planner.
|I've never done that.
What are you talking about? You put on all those beautiful weddings|at the inn.
And the conventions.
|The men in the hats and the buttons.
Yes, but I had a staff at the inn,|and I had resources.
Come on.
|It'll be so fun to work together again.
- Just think about it.
|- Fine, I'll think about it.
Good.
How long do I have to think about it? - About a week.
|- Sookie.
Helen Thompson's son, Aaron,|is having a birthday party and she asked me to cater.
I suggested that you plan it.
|She thought it was a fabulous idea.
So she offered us the job,|and I just took it.
It's Thursday.
She wanted to do it|on Aaron's actual birthday.
I thought that was so sweet.
|Helen's like that, you know? Yes, I know.
I can call her right now and tell her no,|if that's what you want.
I mean it.
You say the word, and it's off.
Maybe we could just try this one,|just to see if you like it.
Maybe.
Okay, Sookie,|can you hear me now? Hello.
Jackson, I can hear you.
- Use the monitor!|- Sorry! - Russian economics sucks.
|- I will make a note.
Tanna? - Tanna.
|- What? - Where did this come from?|- What? This.
The furniture,|the couch, the chairs, the rug.
I don't know.
|It must have been here when I got back.
Hello? I was going to wait until you called me,|but my life isn't as long as yours.
- Did you sit on the couch?|- The couch? I didn't want to get it too soft, I knew you'd be studying there and watching|television and you'd need a little support.
You did this? Of course I did it.
|My granddaughter's a Yalie now.
She needs to live like a Yalie.
But how? When? I snuck in yesterday|when you were in classes just to measure to make sure|everything would fit.
Then I had to butter up|your dippy freshman counselor so she'd let the movers in.
Did you look in|the entertainment center yet? No.
That's a plasma TV with|a VCR and a DVD player.
There's also a five-CD changer|and a turntable and the whole thing is wired|in 5.
1 Surround Sound.
I have no idea what that means,|but the man who installed it said to get Pink Floyd's|Dark Side of the Moon.
It's supposed to be amazing.
Grandma, this is all really sweet,|but I have roommates.
This might make them|a little uncomfortable.
Uncomfortable about what? This is a common room.
|It is common to all of us.
There are four of us|who live here together.
The common room, it's|what we all have in common.
Just show them how to use the remote.
|They'll be fine with everything.
Grandma, I worry|that by you giving me all these things it kind of makes it my room.
- Exactly.
|- What? Never underestimate the value of|the upper hand, Rory.
You are in the real world now.
|Status matters.
Your grandfather|and I are very proud of you.
Enjoy the furniture.
|We'll see you on Friday.
Okay, see you Friday.
My grandmother broke into our room|and furnished it.
Did she put that fireplace in, too? No, Tanna, the fireplace was always Why don't we take a little tour of|the place, okay? Great! They burnt my fries,|forgot to give me extra BBQ sauce the Jeep is making|a crunchy sound again and I gotta spend my evening making|elf ears for Aaron's "Lord of the Rings" party.
Grandma broke in to my dorm|and redid the entire common room in $25,000 worth of furniture|and stereo equipment.
You win.
It's unbelievable.
|You should see this place.
I feel like I'm in Uday's house.
Okay, tell me the whole story.
I came home,|and all the normal furniture was gone and all this stuff was in here.
What did your roommates say? Tanna doesn't know she's at Yale,|Paris saw it and said nothing.
So that's coming.
Janet's jogging.
|I don't know what she thinks but I have to hope she's pleased 'cause the girl's in shape|and can kick my butt.
Make sure something she likes is|on TV when she gets home.
Something soothing to runners.
Maybe something|that goes in a circle over and over.
This is bad.
|This is a totaI invasion of privacy.
I know.
She didn't even ask.
|She got rid of everything that was here.
What if some furniture belonged|to someone who wanted it? I don't know what she was thinking.
She was thinking, "Rory's life, mine.
"Must cover with chenille.
" I can't believe she did this.
- Yes, you can.
|- Excuse me? Come on, it's my mother.
|It's Emily Gilmore.
This is what she does.
You've seen her pull stunts|like this on me before.
That was you.
I said when you borrowed money from her,|this is what you'd get.
- I can't believe you're gloating.
|- I'm not.
I'm just saying,|when you sleep with dogs you wake up|with an entertainment center.
So what do I do? You could say,|"Grandma, this furniture is very nice.
"I appreciate the gesture,|but this is a dorm room "and I cannot guarantee|that the other people "will love it as much as I do.
"I worry about expensive equipment|getting stolen "and it's just too much right now.
" - That sounds good.
|- Okay.
Then my mother will say,|"Rory, your grandfather "and I are paying for you to go to Yale.
"We are enabling you to have|this rarefied education "you're being ungrateful|and small-minded, and I resent it.
"I am hurt on a leveI|you won't understand "until you yourself have a daughter|or a granddaughter "who will cut your heart out|the way you've just cut mine out "and I hope that small veneer|of independence "that you've extracted from this incident "is worth the total alienation|of the grandparents "who have done nothing but love you|and thought of you only.
" Or I could keep the furniture.
Yes, you could.
This is great.
Hon, seriously, if you feeI strongly,|say something.
I just want you to be prepared, that's all.
I know.
Take heart in knowing,|when it comes to controlling a person my mother targeted my soul,|my independence and my entire future,|and at least with you she threw in an ottoman.
Emily? I'm home.
I keep wanting to give this room|a little spruce but for the life of me every one of these fabrics|gives me a headache.
- What do you think of this one?|- It's fine.
That's just the sort of enthusiasm|I was looking for.
Emily, you have excellent taste.
I'm sure whichever one you pick|will look lovely.
- Do you need some ice?|- No.
A taller glass.
- You sound tired.
|- It's been a very long day.
You know, some men retire.
Yes, and some men tattoo|their mothers' names on their biceps.
I don't think the two are|necessarily linked.
I'm fine, Emily.
I just need a drink and a nice meal,|and I'll be good as new.
You got a call from Jason Stiles today.
Digger Stiles? What did he want? - To talk to you.
|- I have nothing to say to him.
He might have something|interesting to tell you.
What? That the turncoat company|I used to work for is cutting my pension? The stock they gave me when|they unceremoniously forced me out has been rescinded? Yes.
That, or hello.
He's probably been sent to do|his father's dirty work.
It's not enough to fire me.
They have to continue to harass me|now that I'm gone.
I thought you always liked Digger.
Yes, I liked Digger|when he was fetching my coffee.
I liked Digger when he was refilling|my stapler.
But I do not like Digger now that he is his father's heir apparent|and sent to annoy me.
I certainly don't understand|why you defend him.
I'm not defending him.
- If you don't want to return his call, don't.
|- Thank you.
I invited him over tomorrow.
|You can find out what he wants then.
You did what? He was absolutely insistent|that he talk to you.
- Why would you do that?|- It was the polite thing to do.
If you don't want him|to come over, I have his number.
You may call and disinvite him.
|It's up to you.
Fine, he can come over,|but he's not staying for a drink.
He can come in and deliver|his message and then leave.
Whatever you say.
That's it.
No drink, no handshake, nothing.
I'll even hide the liquor bottles|so he doesn't get any bright ideas.
It's really comforting to|have such a supportive wife in times like these.
I'm so glad.
- Did you hear?|- Hear what? The first party of the year|is going to be on our floor.
Technically, it's to celebrate|the first week of classes but I'm anticipating the themes|quickly degenerating to: "Walking works, let's drink.
" The important thing is that the first party|is going to be on our floor.
- Our floor.
|- Yes, our floor.
The way it works is|that anyone who wants to be a part of the party|will just leave their door open so people can just wander in and out.
- What do you think?|- About what? Leaving our door open? It's the perfect opportunity|to solidify our social standing at Yale.
It'll guarantee invitations|to every other party thrown this year and we'll get our faces in people's heads.
I don't know.
What don't you know?|I've explained it all to you.
I'm not sure I want to leave our door open|to strangers.
They won't be strangers|once they come in and say howdy.
I'm not sure how I'll feel that night.
- I might be tired.
|- For God's sake, Grandpa, you're 18.
Sleep when you're dead.
We can still go to the party.
We can meet people,|you can solidify your social status get your face in people's heads,|and I can bail when I want.
Going isn't the same.
Going is passive.
Opening your door,|you are giving the party.
You're responsible for the fun.
|People owe you.
- Don't you want people to owe you?|- I'm good, actually.
Sure, you're good.
You're fine.
After all, you have all this fancy furniture|and a big TV to lord over people.
It's the rest of us who are screwed.
The ones whose grandparents|hadn't thought to provide suck-up furniture.
- This is not suck-up furniture.
|- You're being selfish.
You don't care about anybody|but yourself.
No.
I hate college! Okay, we've got costumes,|cutouts, rings, ladies and gentlemen we've got fairy necklaces, tree heads.
I'm picking up|table decorations tomorrow.
Do you need me to order|a "Lord of the Rings" cake? - The cake is under control.
|- Okay, cake's off my list.
- So you've got the menu going, right?|- Yes.
Festive kiddie food like bagel dogs,|Tater Tots, mini pizzas, mac and cheese.
You know what would be great?|Those colored popcorn balls.
- Rory used to go mental over those things.
|- How many adults are gonna be there? - Probably about 10.
|- Okay.
- Hi.
|- Hey.
Okay, so I've scoured the entire store,|and here's what we got.
Hit me.
Horn of Gondor, Legolas' bow, and a cape.
Cape for who? There are 4,000 people|in that movie who wear capes.
- Wow, you're crabby.
|- I wore a bracelet to school today.
My parents were called.
There was a special service in chapel,|and I've been ordered to a soul-searching seminar next week.
I'll be sitting between|the nail-polish-wearing girl and the spicy-condiment user.
- I'm sorry.
|- That's okay.
Leave the horn, the bow, and the bill.
Right.
- Hello?|- I need to talk to you about Rory.
Paris? She's not adjusting well.
|I'm concerned about her.
The socialization process in college is|vitally important.
The connections we make|can last a lifetime.
They can alter our future.
|That's how important they are.
It must be tempting to|emotionally stunt your daughter so she'll return home, take care of you in your old age,|but don't you want better for her? Paris, did something happen|between you and Rory? She won't open the door for the party.
There's a party on our floor,|if you open your door you get to be a part of it,|but she won't open it because she's busy|being Heidi's grandfather.
- If you were a real mother-|- Paris, you called my mother? - You wouldn't listen to me.
|- Give me that phone.
- Hello?|- Hi, honey, how's school? I'm rooming with a Stephen King novel.
What's she talking about? Just some ridiculous party.
|I don't want to let a million strangers traipse through my room,|so she's having a meltdown.
- Sorry she bothered you.
|- That's okay.
I'm gonna kill her.
Remember, you cut off one head,|she'll grow another.
Tell me about the party.
It's just a first-week-of-class kind of thing.
- You going?|- Maybe.
It might not be such a bad idea to get to know the people|in your building see who's gonna have|the emergency Pop-Tarts on hand.
- I'll get to know them.
|- A party might be a fun way to do it.
Are you telling me to let Paris|open the door to the world? I'm not telling you anything.
I want to make sure|that at the end of four years you've not only read|every book in the library you've also had some fun.
I will have fun.
I can see you the night of the party|holing up in your room with a book the entire evening.
You know when I do that,|I'm not hiding.
I enjoy it.
And I'm making friends.
|You saw me make friends.
I know, but I'm not just talking|about making friends.
I'm talking about experiencing things.
Parties, football games,|protests, barn burnings.
Very big amongst the kids these days.
Those are all experiences.
Maybe dumb experiences,|but you never know when you're accidentally gonna|stumble across something that could be something.
Fine, I'll open the door.
- Yes.
|- This isn't for you! Like I care about the reason.
- You might have fun.
|- Yeah.
- Call me later.
|- If I don't, I'm sure Paris will.
- Tell her thanks for me.
|- I will not! - What do you think?|- What is that? You said I could borrow something to|wear to the party.
Yeah, I did, but that's my Chilton uniform.
My mom probably threw it in for a joke.
It's my high-school uniform.
|I wore it every day to You know,|there's a tie in there that goes with it.
Okay, I've scoped out|the other open rooms and no one seems to have copped|a clear identity yet which leaves the field wide open.
|What should we be? We've got a lot of seating,|so we could be the make-out room.
We could crank the stereo up,|push the furniture aside and be the dance room.
Or we could throw down some towels|and be the keg room.
I don't want an identity.
|You already made me open the door.
We're the open-door room.
That's it.
How about some low lighting|and some candles? The meaningful-conversation room.
- No themes.
|- No one knows me here, Rory.
Do you understand what that means?|It means I can start all over.
I can wipe out the last 18 years and introduce people|to the new Paris Geller.
The fun Paris Geller.
I just want everything to be|different this year, that's all.
- One candle.
|- Thank you.
- No, seriously, give me the ring.
|- No way.
- $5.
|- No.
- Just let me hold it.
|- Forget it.
Come on.
I promise I'll give it right back,|my precious.
- I mean, Roger.
|- You're crazy.
What? You're the one|with the pointy ears, my friend.
Here we go.
I'd like you to meet Redmond|and Riley James.
Redmond, Riley, nice to meet you.
|I'm Julie, your cruise director.
I'm here to help you with your costumes.
- I want to be Legolas.
|- I want to be Gimli.
- I want to be Gimli, too.
|- Two Gimlis coming up.
- Lorelai, my hood is loose.
|- Her name's Julie, stupid.
No, it's not, retard.
She just told us her name was Julie.
- She's our cruise director.
|- What's a cruise director? - I don't know, but you fart with your face.
|- Love, guys.
Love, okay? "Lord of the Rings" is all about the love.
No.
It's about the destruction|of all mankind.
And who doesn't love that?|You're fixed.
Go play.
Lovingly.
Lorelei, some of the kids|are asking for swords.
- Did you bring swords?|- No, I didn't.
The Raymonds.
I forgot we made up.
- Will you excuse me?|- Absolutely.
Riley said only boy hobbits|can travel to Mount Doom.
Is that true? In the movie, only boy hobbits|travel to Mount Doom but that's only because|the girls went to do - something even more dangerous.
|- What? Have you ever heard of|a Brazilian bikini wax? - Lorelei.
|- Great, you're here.
So girls go on adventures, too? - And they go in heels.
|- Good.
- Are Rawley and Cheech here?|- They've been chopping for an hour.
Perfect.
There is a full house, isn't there? - You have enough costumes?|- We're good.
The screen's up, tables are set,|and four kids are crying so we're right on schedule.
I better get in the kitchen.
All right, because it's coming up|on elevenses and the hobbits are hungry, right? Right! I'm going.
- Who wants a sword?|- Me! Jason Stiles, look at you.
Look at you.
I've just got a trainer.
You have cheated God.
One minute|and you're already starting with flattery.
- I apologize.
It is lovely to see you, Emily.
|- It's lovely to see you also.
- Did you sell your soul to the devil or-|- How's your mother? - She's exactly the same.
|- And her horses? Have a better life than I do.
- Well, Richard is in his study.
|- I would expect no less.
Come in.
- Richard, there's someone here to see you.
|- Hello, Richard.
I appreciate you taking the time to do this.
I'll leave you two alone.
- Jason, say goodbye before you leave.
|- I'll do that.
- So, how have you been?|- Fine.
- May I sit?|- Your choice.
I hear your business is going well.
You hear correctly.
No reason for it not to be going well.
|You were always the best.
Is that what you came here to tell me how competent I was at my job? Nope, I came here|to make you a proposition.
- Go ahead and make it.
|- I want to be your partner.
- Excuse me?|- I want to join forces with you.
You know, put a desk in your office,|get a copy of the key maybe snag some of that fancy stationery|to write on.
- You're not serious.
|- I'm prepared to buy my way in.
I am also prepared to bring|all of my current clients and that should be appealing to you even if sharing an office|and parting with stationery is not.
Think about it.
I'd make your company|an instant contender with my youth and clients|and your reputation and respectability.
It's a pretty interesting package,|don't you think? - You want to become my partner?|- Yes.
You want to pay me|and bring a whole slew of high-paying clients with you? You keep leaving out the stationery.
Thank you for coming, Jason.
- Is something wrong?|- Yes, something's wrong.
I don't appreciate you wasting my time.
I didn't know that I was.
Am I such a joke to you|that you feel you can take my time away- I assure you, you were no joke.
You were the best|my father's company ever had.
You're right.
|I was the best the company had and now I am the best competition|they will ever have.
Not yet.
But with me, you could be.
Why would you think|I'd believe you were serious about this? When was the last time I stuck|a whoopee cushion on your chair? Your father started the company.
|He made the company.
- With you.
|- You've been there since you were a kid.
All the way through Harvard|you worked there.
You're groomed to take|that company over and now you're telling me|you want to leave? - Yes.
|- Why? Because I want to do|something on my own.
I want to work someplace|that hasn't known me since I was 6.
I'd like to get through an entire day|without being called Digger.
And I really want to piss off my dad.
- You what?|- Can you imagine his face? No, really, take a moment.
Picture it.
I walk into his office.
He's sitting|in his enormous red-leather chair.
I say, "Dad, I am leaving.
"I am taking all of my high-paying clients|with me.
"I'm getting into business|with Richard Gilmore "the man you forced out to|make room for me.
" Can you see that face? - I can see it.
|- It's a pretty good face, isn't it? It is rather satisfying.
So what do you say? You hate your father that much? I don't hate him.
|I just don't want to be him.
Jason, would you care|to join me for a drink? Gladly.
Emily, Jason's going to join us for a drink.
He is? How nice.
Would you mind if I borrowed your phone? - No.
You can use the one in my study.
|- Thank you.
I'll be right out.
So, I see your meeting went well.
It was actually very interesting.
|He wants to be my business partner.
What? What about his father|and his company? He wants to leave.
|He wants to work with the best.
- Good for Digger.
|- I always did like that boy.
- So what did you say?|- I told him I would have to think about it.
I mean, it's not as if I need anyone|working with me.
Things are going very well.
|I'm building a solid client base.
It would be nice for you|not to have to work so hard.
- I don't mind hard work, Emily.
|- I know you don't mind it.
I just said it would be nice|if you didn't have to do it.
- Jason's a very nice boy.
|- Yes, he is.
He is a very nice boy.
What are you doing? - I'm getting the tables ready.
|- They were ready.
- No, ready for the food.
|- They were ready for the food.
- No, they weren't.
|- Yes, they were.
I set them myself.
- But where were the tablecloths?|- Right here.
There.
- They're paper.
|- Yes, they are.
There's monsters on them.
They're "Lord of the Rings" characters,|which is appropriate since this is a "Lord of the Rings" party.
- So this is the table?|- Yes.
- And the paper cups and plates?|- All there on purpose.
- Thought you put them for the kids to see.
|- And use.
But the chafing dish looks so much better|on the white tablecloth.
You shouldn't have|a chafing dish out here.
Why not? A chafing dish has a candle,|and a candle has a flame a kid could stick his finger in|and get hurt.
Isn't that how they learn? - Let's heat things up in the kitchen.
|- Fine.
You made Brie.
With lavender honey|and bourbon-sugared pecans.
I thought it would go nicely|with the crudités platter.
- Tell me you made food for the kids.
|- I did make food for the kids.
These kids.
Not the Romanov kids.
I just put these in case|anyone over the age of 10 gets hungry.
- There are parents, too, you know.
|- I know.
Parents whose responsibility|it would be to keep their kid from hitting another kid or putting their fingers|under a chafing dish.
- Sookie.
|- Fine.
Having a good time?|I'm Paris Geller, Suite 5.
It's open.
It's got a candle.
|Perfect for some deep conversation.
Prepare two to five subjects to discuss so that the conversation|doesn't lag and totally ruin the vibe.
Party on.
I did a survey of all the rooms,|and by far, ours is the best.
Three is way too cluttered.
|Four has developed a weird smell.
Two was a contender|until I started telling everyone that the girl who lives there|was wait-listed.
I'm gonna get out there and mingle.
|This is a great party.
- Rory!|- My God! Madeline, Louise,|what are you doing here? Party, baby.
I thought you were supposed|to be at Mills.
No more Mills? Mills went bye-bye before|I unpacked my shoes.
- She's hanging out at Tulane with me.
|- I love New Orleans.
- I am so Southern.
|- What are you doing here? We found out where|all the first-week parties were.
- We're making the rounds.
|- We hit Harvard next.
- That's where my boyfriend goes.
|- You're dating a Harvard man? - He's gonna be a writer.
|- He hopes.
Right now,|he's freaked that "The Simpsons " will be off the air by the time|he graduates.
Good to see you guys.
|Paris is around here somewhere.
Hope she's in back of that guy there|because that's where I'm heading.
- We'll be back.
|- Good luck.
Rory Gilmore.
- Are you Rory Gilmore?|- Yes, I'm Rory Gilmore.
- Rory, what can we do with that?|- Ro-ro? - A last name can help.
|- Ro-gil? - Gil-roy?|- What are you doing? Giving you a nick.
- Do I know you?|- We get so ahead of ourselves.
I'm Kick.
I'm Mickey.
|Your grandmother told us to look you up.
- My grandmother?|- She's tight with our mom, D-A-R darling.
When she heard we were going to Yale,|she laid down the law.
- Ensure you fell in with the right crowd.
|- Which would be us.
We never settled on a nickname.
I think we're still trying|the last-first combo.
I appreciate you seeking me out,|and it was nice meeting you but I actually have to go|find my roommate.
- Do you have a middle name?|- Yes, that might help.
- What's your birthday?|- Astrological nickname.
Very in.
Seating.
Great fabric.
- This is the furniture Emily bought.
|- That woman does have taste.
- I wish she'd talk to Mom.
|- Then we wouldn't have to.
- Did Mom tell you about Christmas?|- Yes.
Hawaii.
Can't even imagine|what was going through her mind.
Walt Disney can't imagine|what was going through her mind.
You want the guy|that pumps your gas voting? That is what America is about.
- What ignorance.
|- You're the ignorant one.
I had a terrible dream the other night that everything they say|about sunscreen is true.
- I have had that dream.
|- I don't think I'm having fun.
- Party's not over yet.
|- What's with the Gabor sisters? - Friends with my grandmother.
|- Great.
Everybody has a group but me.
What are you talking about? Janet's a runner, so she'll automatically|be in the jock group.
Tanna's a freak,|so she'll be in the John Nash group.
You've got your grandmother's|obligation friends.
I'm stuck over there listening to|a bad talk-radio session.
This sucks.
We could kick everyone out|and just go to bed.
No.
I'll just have to try a little harder.
|I'm determined.
Things are going to be different this year.
Pierce my ear.
Okay, everybody out, now!|This room is closed.
Take your gross beer and your inane conversations|somewhere else.
Move! What's going on? Looks like my roommate's|kicking everybody out.
Bim and bim, up.
Let's move, now.
Sorry.
She's my roommate.
|What can I do? Call me.
Lorelei, some of the kids are starting|to get hungry.
I think we should have the food|ready to go - the minute the movie's over.
|- I agree.
I'll get right on that.
Helen wants us to put the food on.
- One step ahead of you.
|- Good.
So, what do we have here? A little lemon-garlic aioli|for the blanched veggies.
You think I should put|the assorted charcuteries - on this table or this one?|- It depends.
- Which one is the kids' table?|- There are no designated tables.
- I'm mixing and matching here.
|- Okay.
Perfect.
Right here.
- Hello, gorgeous.
What's your name?|- Oh, boy.
I'm hungry.
- Would you like some gravlax?|- Some what? - Sookie, where's the kids' food?|- Okay, you need to relax.
I haven't put the kids' food out yet.
You wouldn't let me use|the chafing dishes and I didn't want the food to get cold.
What did you just do? You just stuck that carrot in your mouth|and then put it back on the platter.
- Why would you do that?|- It tastes like diapers.
- It does not taste like diapers.
|- Honey, go sit down.
- I'll call you when dinner's ready.
|- You take it back.
Okay.
Come on.
What are you doing? - Where is it?|- Where is what? The food that doesn't taste like diapers? - You mean the kids' food?|- Yes.
Did you make any? - I'm not stupid.
|- I never said you're stupid.
I booked this gig.
|I'm the one who came to you and said: "You want to cater a kids' party with me?" Here's the children's food for|the children's birthday party, okay? - What is that?|- It's macaroni and cheese.
It's green.
Why is it green? Because I made it|with a jalapeño-chipotle cream sauce.
- Kids aren't gonna eat this.
|- When they try it- - They won't try it.
|- Why not? - Because it's green.
|- You haven't even offered it to them yet.
- They may surprise you.
|- Where is the rest of it? - The rest of what?|- The rest of the kid food.
- This is it.
|- Sookie.
- They're small.
How much can they eat?|- We talked about this.
I mentioned hot dogs|and pizza puffs and chips.
I told you to make popcorn balls.
|Where the hell are the popcorn balls? You were serious about that? Oh, my God! Is that the cake? Of course it's the cake.
You think I would go|to a birthday party without a cake? What kind of cake is it, Sookie? Chocolate with a rum-raisin,|tropical-fruit ganache.
Okay.
Cheech? Here.
Go to Doose's and get five boxes of frozen mini pizzas|and five boxes of those pigs in a blanket and all the chips you can find.
Go to Westin's, get dozens of cupcakes and have Mamie give you a couple|of big bags of jimmies.
- Chocolate, rainbow, whatever.
|- What are you doing? We'll have them decorate|their own cupcakes.
They'll love it.
Okay, go.
We're going to serve them cupcakes? Maybe they have something to|tide them over for a little while.
- I'm talking here.
|- I know.
Just relax.
It's gonna be fine.
I know it's gonna be fine,|I've been cooking all week long.
I made four different cakes|before choosing that particular one.
- So, yeah, I know it's gonna be fine.
|- But the kids won't eat that.
I'm getting tired of you telling me|what the kids won't eat.
You are supposed to plan the party,|and I'm to do the cooking.
- That's the arrangement.
|- But you have to think about the client.
I am thinking about the client.
|That cake is incredible.
Not if you're an 8-year-old.
- How do you know?|- I had an 8-year-old she hung out with other 8-year-olds my taste now is not that different|from an 8-year-old.
You can't just walk in and take over.
That's not the arrangement.
|You're not in charge here.
- We're partners.
|- I know that.
I'm a great chef.
A great chef does not have|the client decorate his own cupcakes.
- Can I have a juice box?|- We're talking! What's the matter with her? Is she sick? Why is her mouth open? - Lorelei, look at her face.
|- Hi, honey.
There's your juice.
It's grape.
Do you like grape? Me, too.
It makes your tongue all purple.
Take your juice and go watch the rest|of the movie, all right? You look very nice in your costume.
Okay, Sookie, I didn't mean|to just take over like that.
I felt a crisis coming on,|so I snapped into problem-solving mode, and I didn't think.
- I can't do this.
|- Yes, you can.
We just need to be clearer|on the menu next time.
No, not this.
This.
- Isn't it a little late?|- You saw me with that little girl.
- And her face.
I made that face.
|- You were upset.
This is not right.
This is all wrong.
I don't want to be pregnant anymore.
What are you gonna do? Walk it off? Sookie.
Where are you going? A child is not a duvet cover.
You can't just take it back|if it doesn't like you.
Luckily, duvet covers notoriously|like whoever they go home with.
They're like golden retrievers.
You know what happens|if kids don't like you? They tie you to a chair.
|They brain you with a bat.
They set fire to the house|and blame the neighbors.
You can't have kids or live next to them.
I don't know how to talk to them,|how to feed them I cover their party cloths,|and set their fingers on fire.
Just this once.
I make them eat|jalapeño-chipotle cream sauce.
- I'm Mommy Dearest.
|- Back in the kitchen.
No, I can't go back.
|I've got hummus in there.
- Come on.
|- God knows what I'll do with it.
Rawley, could you just go make sure|the kids have enough soda? Okay.
You just have to calm down.
- I can't have it.
|- Yes, you can.
No, I can't.
I'm gonna fail.
Get it out.
Stop.
Breathe.
Drink.
Everything's gonna be fine.
Kids don't like me,|and I'm not so sure I like them.
You'll like your kid.
At family gatherings,|when everyone goes to the living room gathers around, watches the kids? I read.
Jackson's sister has a little girl,|6 years old.
She likes to get up in front of the family|and sing Mariah Carey songs.
I heckle.
I have no desire to play with them.
|Easter egg hunts bore me.
I have never borrowed the neighbor's kid|to look after for the afternoon.
Good.
That's called kidnapping.
"Come on, Jackson, let's have a baby.
"I want to be a mommy.
" I'm pathetic.
- You're not pathetic.
|- I'm gonna be a bad mother.
I should not be a parent.
Sookie, look at me.
There are many people in this world|who should not have been parents.
Mr.
And Mrs.
Hitler, for example.
The Bin Ladens could have|just watched TV that night.
Richard and Emily might have|taken a pass at procreating.
You, no way.
You're gonna be a great parent.
- Yeah?|- Yeah.
- How do you know?|- Because I know you and I watched you with Rory|when she was growing up.
- Who could not like Rory?|- You're gonna be amazing.
That little boy of yours is very lucky.
Okay.
It is gonna be okay.
Yeah.
Okay.
- I'm really okay.
|- Yeah.
- Someone threw up on the table.
|- Oh, God.
I'm okay.
|I'm just gonna go over there and be - Okay.
|- Good idea.
- Hi.
|- Hi.
I'm on the floor.
- You were sleeping.
|- I have no clothes on.
No, you don't.
I'm on the floor, I have no clothes on|and you're a girl.
- So I must be|- On the wrong floor.
Oh, boy.
- Where's your room?|- I think up.
Are we on the first floor? - Yes.
|- Then up.
- Any idea how long I've been here?|- No.
So you have no idea how many people|have walked by while I - Sorry.
|- Great.
Now for the rest of my time at Yale,|I'm gonna be "the naked guy.
" - I'm sorry.
|- And you know what's really great? Tomorrow, when|"the naked guy" nickname starts spreading around campus|like wildfire I'm gonna be in my third hour|of throwing up.
It's been really quiet out here|for a while now so there's a chance that no one but me|has actually seen you yet.
- Yeah?|- I promise I won't say anything.
And if there's a chance|that you could refrain from being naked again|in the wrong hallway at the next party there's a chance you might get|a completely different nickname like "the never-naked guy.
" - You're a very kind person.
|- Wait.
Hold on.
You can borrow this.
Thanks.
Weren't you in|my Japanese fiction class today? - Yeah, that's right.
|- I thought so.
Hi, I'm Marty.
Rory.
- I won't remember that tomorrow.
|- That's perfectly understandable.
I should probably try|and find my room and my pants.
- That's where I kept my keys.
|- So pants first.
Right.
Pants first.
Night.
I'm officially stupider than my brother.
I never thought that would happen.
Hi.
- I decided I'm going to do it.
|- To do what? I'm going to go in there and I'm going to tell Grandma|that she's going to butt out of my life.
Can I? Just checking.
So you have soberly decided|to confront my mother? Yes.
- You sure you want to do this?|- Yes.
- All right, then I support you 100%.
|- Thank you.
- Wait for the right moment.
|- The right moment is now.
The right moment arrived in a big pink hat|full of feathers screaming: "Notice me because I am here! " Well, if it was wearing a hat.
- There they are.
|- Hi, Mom.
Come in.
I tell you, this day has been|an absolute circus.
I misplaced every single thing I needed.
My grocery list,|my ticket for the shoe repair.
It was a nightmare.
|What will you girls have? Wait for the moment.
Grandma, I have to talk to you|about something.
Yes, Rory, what is it? I have an announcement.
I am going into business with Jason Stiles.
Who? - You've met him, the Stiles boy.
|- Digger.
Nobody's called him Digger|in years, Lorelei.
Yes, I just got off the phone.
We're going to get together later|and hash out the details.
Richard, that is wonderful.
I didn't know you were looking|for a partner.
He wasn't.
Jason came to him.
Right.
He said he wanted to strike out|on his own he wanted to work with the best,|and he wanted to screw over his father.
- What?|- Excuse me, Rory.
You never told me about this.
I was a bit surprised at the beginning but I have to admit that when he told me that part of his motive was revenge,|I was intrigued.
No, I was tickled.
|I thought it was wonderful.
What a wonderful world we live in|that the son of my enemy hates his father,|and that I benefit from it all.
It's downright Elizabethan.
I don't think this is very funny, Richard.
No, I suppose not.
|However, I can't stop smiling.
I don't think you should go|into business with this boy.
- Now, Emily.
|- He's obviously very troubled.
You don't need to hand over|your business to a troubled youth.
He's 37 years old.
Yes.
And all he can think about is|how to get back at his father.
- I don't understand that kind of thinking.
|- You know Floyd.
He's horrible.
He is the boy's father.
He raised him.
He clothed him.
He fed him.
He does not deserve to be paid back|for all of his love and devotion like this.
- Why are you so upset?|- I don't want to talk about it anymore.
- Emily, be reasonable.
|- I never liked that Digger in the first place.
Emily, come back here.
It wasn't the right moment.
I was about to, and Grandpa came in,|he interrupted and now Grandma's mad,|so I'm sorry if it seems to you like I chickened out, but I didn't,|and now it's just gonna have to wait.
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