Glitch Techs (2020) s02e10 Episode Script

BITT Prime

1
[kids laughing]
-[Glitch chittering]
-[both panting]
[chitters]
[both grunt]
I know a lot of video games
have sewer levels, but
[coughs] the real thing is nasty.
Careful, this Glitch is classified
as a spawner!
Whatever you do, don't miss!
What happens if I miss? [yelps]
[bolt ricochets]
[Five] I missed.
[both whimper]
[screeches]
-[Five] Whoa!
-That's what happens.
Come in, BITT! Miko and I
could use a little tech support here.
Please hold. There are currently
six requests ahead of you.
[Miko] Hold? BITT never puts us on hold.
Get 'em!
[Glitches chittering]
[Five] We got 'em cornered!
Whoa! [grunts]
-We need a plan here, Five!
-Mmm
The grates! Let's cage these suckers.
Atta brain, Fiver!
Switching emitters.
[Glitches chitter]
[bleeping]
-Thanks for playing.
-Glad we finally got them covered.
[laughs]
We're action heroes.
Nice move with that cage lid.
Where'd you pull it from?
That giant pipe over there.
With the hazard sign.
And the big cartoony
pressure gauge thingy!
[both] Oh, nerds.
[both screaming]
[BITT] Thank you for holding.
How may I assist you today?
We need a way out of here! Now!
[BITT] Please hold
while I trace your location.
[Miko] To the left, to the left!
[BITT] Thank you for holding.
The safest exit is to the right.
-What? [screams]
-[grunts]
-[Five] Now, he tells us!
-[Miko screams]
[both scream]
[both groaning]
I think I broke my butt.
This quest was not worth the XP. Ugh.
[Haneesh] BITT, a goblin ate my van key!
-[Nix] We're in a kaizo trap!
-[Mitch] Our portal is stuck!
[BITT] Please hold
for immediate assistance.
Please hold for less immediate assistance.
[stuttering] Please hold for
[BITT powering down]
No, no, no!
Don't you give me that pinwheel,
you ergonomic nightmare!
[Miko] Aww, what's wrong with BITT, Phil?
Uh, everything.
His processor's slow,
his memory's going, and
Sometimes, I don't know why I keep
this old clunker around, anyway.
You keep me around
because I am running all this facility's
essential Glitch-related tasks.
Yeah, trying to run them
is more like it, R2-Do-Nothing.
Aww! Look at you two,
bickering like a couple of old
[Phil growling softly]
-[growling continues]
-[Miko] I'm done.
Glitch signature identified, Fishwakka.
Now processing your XP.
[automated voice]
Fishwakka download commencing.
Uh, my arm's getting numb.
BITT, I swear,
if you lock up on me one more time,
I'm gonna have you decommissioned
once and for all.
Don't you listen to him, BITT. Ugh.
[grunts] He doesn't mean what he's saying!
Are these ears?
[Phil] No touchie!
He has work to do
while I peruse this catalog
of new helper bots in the reading room.
You heard Phil.
He wants to decommission BITT.
Like, deactivate! Destroy!
Deep sea diving?
Do not mock this moment, Bergy!
[Bergy whimpers]
We can't let Phil get rid of BITT.
He's family.
When my dad and I
used to repair old computers,
we'd clean out their memory
and get them working like new again.
-So, could we do that for BITT?
-I don't see why not.
You hear that, BITT?
Me and Five will get you working like new.
[stuttering] Your call is important to me.
No. You're important to us.
-And my arm is getting numb.
-[beeping]
[automated voice] Error.
Fishwakka download incomplete.
[man] Who knows what really happens
when a video game starts to glitch?
Here come the Glitch Techs
They know what to do ♪
They got the tech
They got the moves ♪
Glitch Techs
They're the wrecking crew ♪
They'll solve the problem ♪
Glitch Techs
When a Glitch is loose ♪
They'll wipe them out
Old school or new ♪
Glitch Techs
Always coming through ♪
To solve the problem ♪
Glitch Techs ♪
Whoa-oh-oh ♪
Glitch Techs ♪
Yeah ♪
[Five] Okay, buddy, this smart room
should give us virtual access
to your file system.
[Miko] Uh, so long as you're cool with us
poking around inside your brain.
[BITT stuttering] Uh
Is that a "yes"?
It's not a "no."
[both] Whoa!
[BITT] Warning. Unauthorized tampering
may void my manufacturer's warranty.
No wonder BITT's so laggy.
His virtual memory's crammed so full
of files, there's no room to--
[groans] Breathe.
Hey, BITT? Could you pull up
your memory usage graph?
Whoa, we gotta clear a lot of space
to get BITT back to max speed.
Max speed!
[laughs]
Hello, what's this now?
Look, these photo files
go back to the Stone Age.
This must be the face
of whoever's been using
poor BITT as their personal file dump.
[both gasp]
[voice shaking] I have seen
the ravages of time.
[Five] BITT, are these all Phil's files?
[BITT] Correct. It has been 20 years
since my authorized owner, Phil Altiere,
last deleted a file.
BITT, highlight all backed up
and deletable files.
How do we actually delete them?
[Five] Aww, yeah!
Goodbye, junk mail!
Sayonara, spam!
Beat it, browser history!
[Five grunts]
[both grunt]
[beeps]
What is taking up all this space?
BITT, are there any hidden files?
[BITT] Now revealing one hidden file.
[Five] Nice try, file.
You can dot-slash-run,
but you can't dot-slash-hide.
-[file buzzes]
-[screams]
[BITT] I am sorry. I do not have
enough memory to delete this file.
So, he doesn't have enough memory
to delete the file
that's taking up all of his memory.
It looks like a compressed file.
I can't tell what's inside.
[Miko] Going by the icon, they're probably
Phil's favorite dessert recipes.
If it's too big to delete at once,
we could just open it and hammer away
at whatever's inside. Right?
Yes to using more hammers.
[beeps]
[BITT] Folder uncompressed.
[stutters] Now auto-running program file
Coo-Pie-Caken.exe.
"Auto-running"?
No! Wait! No, no, no, no, no!
[both screaming]
[Miko] What?
Did we fix him?
[stuttering] Cookie! Pie! Caken
Uh, I think we de-fixed him.
[gasps] No!
-We have to go tell Phil.
-[Miko sobbing]
[beeping]
Hmm.
-[Miko] You talk to him.
-Me? No, you!
-[Miko] Uh-uh!
-I'm posturing for a bite here.
Sorry, but, uh
[coughs] It's about BITT.
What about him?
You know when you said
you'd decontaminate,
decombobulate, de-something-bad-inate?
Yeah, "decommission him"?
I say that every time he acts up,
but I don't mean it.
Truth is, this whole place
would fall apart without him.
[both] Aww.
No, I mean that's literally the truth.
We'd all be out of jobs.
[both whimper]
See these sleek new models?
Sure, they got nice bells and whistles,
but that's nothing compared to what
I've invested in BITT over the years.
[both] Aww.
I'd destroy anyone that harmed him.
[both whimper]
What was it that you wanted again?
[Five] Uh, he's a great bot.
-[Miko] You're a great boss.
-Nothing's weird.
[both chuckling nervously] Bye!
Hmm?
[sighs]
-Maybe we can just plug him back--
-[gasps] Wait.
[Miko] Where's BITT?
We better go check his console.
[automated voice]
Fishwakka download incomplete.
[Bergy stammers] Is someone there?
[Miko] Bergy?
[automated voice]
Fishwakka download incomplete.
[both grunt]
[both groan]
Bergy, have you seen BITT?
Oh, yeah, I saw him. He went that way.
[both gasp]
Want me to call Phil?
[stammers] We should probably call--
Phil will destroy us
if he finds out! Destroy!
Not if we track BITT down
and bring him home before he finds out.
Only, uh, one of us
should cover things here.
You're right.
Bergy, you've just been promoted.
Just cover for BIT
and keep things quiet until we find him.
Aye, aye! You're in good hands!
-[automated voice] Fishwakka download--
-Quiet!
This is gonna be a piece of cake.
[chittering]
[BITT] Now executing program,
Cookie-Pie-Cake.
Scanning for cookie ingredients.
Negative match.
Negative match.
[beeping]
Positive match!
Milk and sugar located.
[tires screech]
[driver yelps]
[whimpers]
I require 200 gallons of sugared milk
suitable for immediate cryodesiccation.
Uh, cup or cone?
Thank you for your compliance.
[driver whimpers]
[horn honking]
[BITT] Warning.
Potential threat approaching.
Hinobi Tech Support
would like to apologize
for any inconvenience this minor Glitch
So on and so forth, goodbye.
There! Got him on the tracker!
[cars honking]
[both scream]
[van crashes]
Hey, let's split up. Get it?
[laughs]
Yeah, I got it. But if I take the van,
what will you do?
-I'm just gonna wing it.
-[Ally caws]
[Bergy typing] Hello? Please hold.
-[dial tone beeping]
-Uh, hello? Um, please hold.
Uh, Hinobi Tech Support,
HQ Operations Manager.
-Yes, that's a real job, Nix.
-[fishwakka chirps]
BITT? He's in the little bot's room
at the moment, but
-I've got things completely under control.
-[chitters]
-[shrieks]
-[Bergy screams]
[BITT] Pie ingredient requires fruit.
[man] Fresh fruit, no preservatives!
[BITT] I require 200 gallons
of organic produce.
Eh, nice cosplay, Tintin.
What is it, free comic book day?
-Pie requires fruit.
-[drill whirring]
Hey!
[caws]
I found him, Five!
[Ally caws]
BITT, it's me, Miko!
I know you are buggin' out right now,
and that is all our fault,
but if you'd just
come back home with us
-Please, we just wanna help you.
-[alarm ringing]
This is for your own good, bud!
[in slow motion] No!
-Did you see what he just--
-Go! Go! Go!
[tires screech]
[coughs] All this for a free comic book?
Hinobi Tech Support.
Blah, blah, blah, bye!
Come in, Bergy! Everything okay at HQ?
Yep.
-Everything going okay with BITT?
-Oh, yeah, totally.
Great! Can't wait to have him back.
-[fishwakka growls]
-[whimpers] As soon as possible.
Hey, uh, totally unrelated,
but do you have any power-ups
you could upload to our gauntlets?
Something that could stop
a rampaging tech bot?
[yelps]
[fishwakka growls]
[stammers] Ah. Here's one.
Says it'll neutralize any Glitch tech
within its area of effect,
but before I upload it, first I need
to read you the terms and conditions.
[Five and Miko] Nobody reads those!
[yelps]
[fishwakka chitters]
Uh, okay, uploading now!
[Miko and Five] Whoa!
[both scream]
[horn honking]
-[Miko] Whoa! Yeah!
-[Five] Whoa!
Whoo-hoo!
Respect the tech! Whoo!
[automated voice]
New power-up unlocked. EMP.
Thanks, Bergy!
Hey, that's why you made me
Operations Manager.
Solving one problem at a time.
[all growling]
Oh, shmup.
[fishwakka chittering]
[beeps]
The brownie marshmallow crepe.
[sniffs] Oh!
[slurps]
-What the--
-[chitters]
Sport
you just pilfered the wrong petit four.
Welcome to Mama Miyamoto's
Spaghetti in a Bucket.
Cake requires 200 gallons of flour.
Uh, this window is for drive-thru only.
[beeping]
'Kay. So that was 200 one-gallon buckets.
Do you wanna add some toppings
for just 99 cents?
Uh
BITT! Please, just come back
to HQ for some repairs.
If you do, I call shotgun, 'cause you
are rocking that chassis right now.
I must complete my programming.
That program isn't you.
It's just some glitch from that folder
we found inside your memory.
Think of Phil. He needs you.
But Coo-Pie-Caken is my priority.
And you're ours,
so please don't make us use force.
[BITT] Warning! EMP detected!
You're making me use force here, dude.
Use the force already!
[automated voice] EMP activated.
No! It's de-rezzing everything! BITT!
Okay, so maybe we should have read
those terms and conditions.
[Miko] No.
Oh, BITT, we are so sorry.
All we ever wanted was to help.
It might be okay.
Uh, this core cylinder
could be his main processor,
like his mind, or his heart, or
Whatever it is, we take it to Phil.
[cylinder chimes]
[BITT] Emergency defenses activated.
Rebooting to safe mode.
[Five chuckling nervously] See?
It's safe mode!
That sounds safe?
[thuds]
[in deep voice] BITT Prime form achieved.
[Miko] BITT Prime?
Now resuming priority program.
Do not interfere again.
[Miko screams]
[both grunt]
[Bergy] Uh, guys? Come in, guys.
You still on your way back with BITT?
[both grunting]
We messed up big, Bergy. Real big.
That EMP didn't stop BITT.
It triggered some crazy defense mode,
and now he's more out of control
than before! When Phil finds out--
Oh, we're well past
the part where Phil finds out.
[both gasping]
-We can explain.
-[Miko whimpers]
I only wanna know one thing.
Where is my tech bot?
[fishwakka shrieks]
[Five] Hey, wait.
Phil told us to stay put.
[Miko] We are staying put.
We're just looking for BIT
while we do it.
[sighs] I just wish we had our gauntlets
so we could track him.
Yeah, I don't think
we'll be needing gauntlets for that.
[dog barks]
[Miko] Ew, why would BITT's program
lead him to this old dump?
[floor creaking]
[cat hissing in distance]
Whoa! Easy there, buddy.
We're not here to stop you this time.
See? No gauntlets! [chuckles nervously]
[BITT Prime] Maintain your distance.
Should we tell him that
that's the refrigerator?
[automated voice]
Chemical combination lock activated.
[cat meows]
[automated voice] Please insert
your ingredients in the correct order.
[beeping]
[automated voice] Combination complete.
Now serving Coo-Pie-Caken.
Holy smokes! All this time
Coo-Pie-Caken was a game cartridge?
Ooh! Retro-chic! Let me at it!
[alarm beeps]
[automated voice] Unauthorized
personnel detected.
Uh, I think
there's been a misunderstanding, see
[BITT Prime] You were warned.
[both whimper]
BITT, if there's anything left of us
in your memory, you gotta help us!
[BITT stutters] Must help the--
[BITT Prime stutters] Not a priority.
[both scream]
[BITT] Override all security.
Hi5 and MeK.O.
are authorized Hinobi Technicians!
He does remember us!
[BITT stutters] You remain in my memory
but I cannot override my priority.
-No!
-BITT!
Oh, no.
Huh?
[Miko] Phil?
Computer, disengage security system
on my authorization code.
[clears throat]
[echoing] Yum, yum, yummy,
in my tum, tum, tummy.
[automated voice] Authorized owner
Phil Altiere recognized.
Picture archived.
You two wanna tell me
what you're doing in my house?
This is your house?
Wow! It's nice?
I asked you a question.
-You were so frustrated with BITT
-We tried to free up his memory
But there was a huge hidden file
And that's when his programming
went all Coo-Pie-Caken!
[sighs] Well, since that made no sense,
how about we just ask BITT?
Hello!
I am BITT,
a Binary Intelligence Tech Trainer!
Now closing completed tasks
and checking system memory.
Wow! He's purring like a kitten.
How'd he free up so much memory?
Thanks to Hi5 and MeK.O.,
I was able to finally
complete my last-executed program
-[chiming]
-which has now been deleted.
What program?
That was the name of the hidden program
file we found in BITT's memory.
It sent him looking for that.
Hidden file, huh? Hidden by who?
Wait. You mean, you didn't?
Huh? Are you two still here?
Get back to HQ and help Bergy clean up!
-You mean we're not--
-You're just lucky
you didn't do any permanent damage
to my bot.
Isn't that right, pal?
That is right,
authorized owner Phil Altiere.
Also known as Pal.
[both] Aww.
You two are like a couple of old--
[growls]
[both chuckle nervously] Bye!
[Phil sighs]
[blows]
[whirring]
What?
[Phil] Hey, you. It's, um you.
If you don't remember making this video,
it means you probably got memory-wiped
by someone at the company again.
You know how they do that.
Thankfully, BITT has enough memory
for the both of us.
So when all else fails,
he can protect the files we recovered
from Hinobi's development lab
on this cartridge.
Keep 'em safe, Phil.
They may come in handy
when things get glitchy.
[chiptune music playing]
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