Goof Troop (1992) s02e08 Episode Script
Talent to the Max
1
♪♪
AH-HYUCK.
H-H-H-HIT IT ♪
LIKE FATHER, LIKE SON ♪
YOU'RE ALWAYS
NUMBER ONE ♪
YES!
THERE'S BUDDIES,
THERE'S PALS ♪
YEAH ♪
YOU ALWAYS SEEM
TO WORK THINGS OUT ♪
CAN'T YOU SEE
YOU'RE TWO OF A KIND ♪
LOOKIN' FOR
A REAL GOOD TIME? ♪
WHAA-OOO-HO-HO!
A REAL GOOD
TIME ♪
YAAH-HOO-HOO!
REPOR
TO THE GOOF TROOP ♪
AND WE'LL ALWAYS
STICK TOGETHER ♪
ALWAYS
STICK TOGETHER ♪
WE'RE THE GOOF TROOP ♪
THE BEST OF FRIENDS
FOREVER ♪
SIDE BY SIDE
WHEREVER WE GO ♪
WE'RE ALWAYS
READY TO ROLL ♪
NOW
GIMME A BEAT ♪
WE'RE THE GOOF TROOP ♪
AND WE ALWAYS
STICK TOGETHER ♪
WE'RE THE GOOF TROOP ♪
THE BEST OF FRIENDS
FOREVER ♪
NOW WE'RE CALLING
EVERYONE ♪
COME ALONG
AND JOIN THE FUN ♪
REPORT TO
THE GOOF TROOP ♪
LA DO BE DA BOP
LA BA DO BOP ♪
YEAH!
[PJ]
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN,
BOYS AND GIRLS,
PREPARE TO BE
INCREDIBLIZED
BY THE GREATES
MAGIC SHOW
IN THE HISTORY OF
THIS HOUSE!
PRESENTING
FOR YOUR AMAZEMENT,
THE GREAT MAXINI!
TA-DA!
HOW YA DOIN',
LADIES AND GERMS?
WE'RE GONNA MAKE THIS
DISAPPEAR BEFORE VERY
YOUR NOSE.
HOW DOES HE DO I
YOU ASK? IT'S MAGIC!
ALL RIGHT,
LET'S HEAR I
FOR GRAVITY!
PICK A CARD,
ANY CARD,
IT'S ALL PART OF
THE SHOW, FOLKS.
HAND'S QUICKER
THAN THE EYE.
NOTHIN' UP MY SLEEVE.
PRESTO!
O.K., PITCHER OF
ORDINARY MOO JUICE.
A WAVE OF THE WAND,
AND ABRACADABRA, AND--
WATCH OUT!
TA-DA!
GIMME A BREAK.
HMM. UH. THAT'S
DIFFERENT.
[YAWN]
WELL?
YOU LIKE IT?
UH, I GOTTA GO
MELT SOME CRAYONS.
DAD, YOU EVER SEE
ANYTHING LIKE THA
IN YOUR WHOLE
ENTIRE LIFE?
WELL, THEM TRICKS
WERE VERYTRICKY.
YES! COAST-TO-COAST RAVES
FOR THE GREAT MAXINI.
ARE WE GONNA ACE
THIS SCHOOL TALENT SHOW
OR WHAT?
WE'RE GONNA HAVE
THOSE JUDGES SCREAMIN'.
YEAH,
RIGHT FOR THE EXITS.
BUT DAD JUST SAID--
HEY, WHEN THAT'S ALL
YOUR DAD CAN SAY, MAN,
YOU KNOW YOU STINK.
STINK?
LIKE A SKUNK
WITH B.O.
MAYBE IF YOU DID
A GOOD TAP-DANCE
OR GARGLED GOLDFISH
OR SOMETHIN' '.
OH, YOU'RE SAYIN'
THE ACT NEEDS
A LITTLE POLISH.
MAX, IT NEEDS
DRY CLEANING.
GOTCHA.
LIGHTING'S ALL WRONG.
AND WE NEED
BETTER COSTUMES.
TRY SACKS ON OUR HEADS.
AND OUR TRICKS ARE
REAL RE-TREADS.
I MEAN,
HOW MANY GUYS HAVE YOU SEEN
PUT MILK IN THEIR HATS?
AND POUR IT ON
THEIR HEADS?
UHONE.
SO FIRST THING TOMORROW
WE HIT THE MAGIC SHOP,
AND GET SOME REAL TRICKS.
THE TALENT SHOW'S
ONLY THE BEGINNING,
PEEJ.
WE'RE RIDIN'
A MAGIC CARPE
TO FAME AND FORTUNE.
YEAH,
DOWN A DEAD END STREET.
HOW MUCH MONEY
YOU GOT, PEEJ?
10 BUCKS.
HOW MUCH YOU GOT?
10 BUCKS!
COME ON.
UMHELLO?
[COUGH COUGH COUGH]
[COUGH COUGH COUGH
COUGH COUGH]
[COUGH COUGH]
[COUGH COUGH
COUGH COUGH]
WAY COOL!
A REAL MAGICIAN!
BINGO, BIG BOY.
PRESENTING
THE GREAT GARBONZO!
THAT'S ME--
[GRUMBLE] GARBONZO.
AND I AM THE GREAT MAXINI.
PRESENTING MY ASSISTANT--
PJ THE SPLENDID.
YO.
YEAH,
ALWAYS HAPPY TO MEE
A FELLOW
HOCUS-POCUSER.
SO, WHAT CAN I DO
FOR YOU, MAXINI?
DON'T YOU TELL ME,
YOU WANT TO BUY A TRICK,
RIGHT?
NOW, SEEING AS HOW
YOU'RE IN THE MAGIC
BUSINESS, TOO,
I TELL YA WHA
I'M GONNA DO.
PRESENTING
THE AMAZING WILTING
FLOWER TRICK!
WA-BA-DA-BA-BA-DA!
SWAMIBEGONIA.
[HUMMING]
OH, MAN.
UH, WE'RE SORTA
LOOKIN' FOR SOMETHING
WITH MORE, UH
PIZZAZZ. I KNEW IT.
A KID WHO'S ON HIS WAY
TO THE TOP.
THE ENCHANTED
[HUMMING]
CARD TRICK.
GUARANTEED
TO KNOCK 'EM COLD.
ONLY 3 BUCKS.
C'MON, MAX. THIS
HOCUSER'S BOGUS.
HE'S NOT A REAL MAGICIAN.
HE DOESN'T EVEN
HAVE A HAT.
HEY, HOW ABOU
THAT ONE?
THE LEVITATING
BIRTHDAY CAKE. WOO!
A FINE CHOICE,
MR. MAXINI--
OR, UH,
CAN I CALL YOU GREAT?
A BARGAIN AT 5 BUCKS.
HIDEE-HI, HODEE-HO.
FROSTING FLY.
HERE WE GO.
MAX,
LET'S BUG OUTTA HERE.
GIMME A BREAK, KID,
I'M JUST GETTIN' WARMED UP.
BINKY DINKY DOUBLE FUDGE.
ARISE OR I'LL TURN YOU
INTO SLUDGE.
NO! STOP! HE'S JUST A KID!
ALL RIGHT! ALL RIGHT!
I'M NOT GREAT!
I'M THE WORLD'S
WORST MAGICIAN!
WHOA! HOW MUCH
FOR THAT HAT?
HAT? HAT?
WHAT HAT? WHAT HAT?
THAT'S IN THAT--
FORGET IT, KID.
NOTHIN' BUT TROUBLE,
NOTHIN' BUT TROUBLE.
HERE, HAVE A COUPLE OF
DISAPPEARING RABBITS.
TAKE ONE OF THESE
AND A COUPLE OF THOSE.
HEY, MAGIC SCISSORS.
CUT UP ANYTHING AND
STICK IT TOGETHER.
HAT'S NOT FOR SALE.
HEY. MAGIC YO-YO.
WELL, BUT--THANKS,
BUT THAT HAT--
SAW SOME LADIES IN HALF.
NO LADIES? SAW SOME GUYS
IN HALF.
YEAH, BUT THE HAT!
BUT I CAN'T AFFORD THIS!
KNOCK 'EM DEAD, KID,
IT'S FREE, IT'S FREE.
O.K.?
FREE,
ALL RIGHT, KID?
ALL RIGHT.
C'MON, PEEJ.
YOU HEARD THE MAN.
WE'RE GONNA
KNOCK 'EM DEAD.
[DOORBELL RINGS]
HEY, NEIGHBOR.
BORROW A CUP OF SUGAR?
WELL,
WHILE I'M HERE,
MIGHT AS WELL BORROW
SOME OF THIS, AND, UH--
OOH, I'LL TAKE THA
AND RECYCLE IT FOR HIM.
THE MAGNIFICENT,
THE INCREDIBLE,
THEUH
MEGA-COOL.
OH, YEAH. THANKS.
MEGA-COOL, UH,
GREAT MAXINI.
TA-DA! HIYA, HIYA,
LADIES AND GERMS.
I JUST FLEW IN
FROM MAGICLAND,
AND BOY,
ARE MY ARMS TIRED.
HEY, ON WITH THE SHOW,
AS MY ASSISTAN
PJ THE SPLENDID
DARES ME TO UNTANGLE
THE MYSTERIOUS
MAGIC RINGS.
WITH A FLIP AND A FLAP
AND AN ABRACADABRA.
KIDS. SHOWS YOU
WHAT HAPPENS
WHEN THEY DON'
GET ENOUGH TV.
TA-DA!
HUH? HEY!
WHA--WHA--WHAT?
WHAT--HEY!
HEY.
FOR MY NEXT ILLUSION,
I'LL NEED A VOLUNTEER
FROM OUR VAST AUDIENCE.
ANYONE? HUH, HUH?
THANK YOU, SIR.
A SNIPPETY-SNIP
OF THE MAGIC SCISSORS,
AND YOUR TIE IS RUINED.
BUT--HA HA--NEVER FEAR.
A WAVE OF THE WAND,
AND ABRACADABRA--
AND--
OH, GAWRSH.
WHAT DO YA THINK
YOU'RE DOIN'?
UH, THE INCREDIBLY
MYSTERIOUS APPEARING
SCARVES TRICK.
HA HA HA HA!
OOH, BABY! HA HA!
WOO HOO.
SO WHAT WE'RE SEEIN' IS
THE ACT NEEDS JUS
A LITTLE MOREPRACTICE?
THAT GOOF COULD PRACTICE
TILL HE'S IN THE 47th GRADE,
AND HE STILL WON'
WIN THE TALENT SHOW!
AND YOU.
DON'T YOU LET ME
CATCH YOU
LETTIN' HIM MAKE YOU
LOOK LIKE A GEEK AGAIN!
NOW, WAIT A MINUTE, PETE!
THAT'S MY SON
YOU'RE TALKIN' ABOUT!
AND DON'T LET ME CATCH YOU
LETTIN' ME BORROW ANYTHING
WHILE I'M CATCHIN' YOU
AND LETTIN' YOU BORROW I
FROM ME AGAIN!
UH, MAX, YOU KNOW
THEY'RE NICE TRICKS,
BUT MAYBE YOU OUGHTA WAI
TILL NEXT YEAR'S TALENT SHOW.
LIKE THEY ALWAYS SAY,
THE EARLY BIRD
ALWAYS, UH
GETS THE WORM AND
HOW'S IT GOING, MAX?
AH, IT ISN'T GOIN'
ANYWHERE.
FORGET IT, PEEJ.
I'M TAKIN'
THIS STUFF BACK.
YEAH, BUT WHAT ABOU
THE TALENT SHOW?
NO TALENT, NO SHOW.
FAME AND FORTUNE.
YEAH, RIGHT.
I CAN'T EVEN PLAY
THE HARMONICA.
MR. GARBONZO!
HELLO!
IT'S THE NOT-SO-GREA
MAXINI.
M-M-MR. GARBONZO,
I'M RETURNING YOUR STUFF!
NEVER WANTED TO BE
A MAGICIAN ANYWAY.
[CREAK]
Voice: DON'T BE
SO SURE, KID.
Voice:
SO YOU WANT TO BE
A MAGICIAN?
WHO SAID THAT?
WHERE ARE YOU?
TA-DA!
CARD TRICKS GOT YOU DOWN?
CAN'T PULL A RABBIT OUT OF
A HAT?
DO I HAVE THE ANSWER FOR YOU!
Y-Y-YOU'RE TALKING!
BET YOUR BEANIE, BINKY.
BUT YOU'RE JUST A HAT!
JUST A HAT!
WAS GEORGE WASHINGTON
JUST A GUY WITH BAD TEETH?
WAS TOM EDISON JUST A GUY
WHO NEEDED A LIGHT?
KID, KID,
I'M YOUR TICKET TO
FAME AND FORTUNE.
TRY THIS ON.
PRESENTING
THE GREAT MAXINI!
LIKE IT, LIKE IT?
YOU DO? GREAT.
GOES WITH THE SHOES
HUH?
I GOTTA BE DREAMIN'.
A TALKIN' HAT TELLIN'
THE WORLD'S WORS
MAGICIAN HE'S GREAT?
SHH! SHH! QUICK!
IX-NAY! IX-NAY!
DON'T EVER SAY THAT.
YOU'RE GONNA BE GREAT.
YOU ARE GREAT!
YOU ALWAYS BEEN GREAT!
COME ON. REALLY?
REALLY? REALLY? REALLY?
DID HOUDINI ESCAPE
THE GAPING JAWS OF
A RABID CHICKEN, HUH?
I SAW IT, I TELL YA,
IT CHANGED MY WHOLE LIFE.
YOU NEED MAGIC TO GET AHEAD.
I NEED A HEAD
TO GET AHEAD.
A HAT LIKE ME IS NOTHIN'
WITHOUT ONE.
OH, WHAT A TEAM WE'LL MAKE.
GO AHEAD, GO AHEAD,
DO A TRICK.
BUT I DON'T KNOW
ANY TRICKS.
TRUST ME.
HOLD OUT YOUR HANDS.
GOTTA MAKE WITH
THE MUMBO-JUMBO, KID.
OH. UHUH
ABRACADABRA.
WOW. I DID THAT?
I MIGHTA HELPED
A LITTLE,
BUT SURE YOU DID.
SO WHAT DO YOU SAY
WE GOT A DEAL?
BUT GARBONZO SAID
YOU WEREN'T FOR SALE.
HE SAID YOU WERE
NOTHIN' BUT TROUBLE.
HEY, THAT WAS THE GUY
WHO TOLD HOUDINI
TO GIVE UP MAGIC AND
BECOME A DERMATOLOGIST.
DO NOT WORRY.
I'LL SQUARE I
WITH THE GARBONSTER.
AW, C'MON, C'MON,
C'MON.
TAKE ME HOME
WITH YA, PLEASE!
WITH CHERRIES AND
GUMMI DWOPS ON TOP!
I DON'T KNOW.
GO AHEAD,
TAKE A CHANCE.
FAME AND FORTUNE,
KID.
FAME AND FORTUNE.
THE GREAT MAXINI!
WELL
MAYBE JUS
FOR THE TALENT SHOW.
I GUESS IT'S O.K.
OF COURSE IT'S O.K.
AND NOW, THE MOMEN
YOU'VE BEEN WAITING FOR,
THE ONE, THE ONLY,
THE GREAT MAXINI!
ABRACADABRA!
[ROAR]
[TWEETING]
[RING]
OHHWHAT A DREAM.
TALKING HATS
WHEW.
NEXT I'LL BE SEEIN'
PINK ELEPHANTS.
I PREFER PURPLE
MYSELF.
[GASP]
Y-YOU'RE REAL!
REAL AS THE DAY
I WAS STITCHED.
AND I AM RESIDING
ON THE HEAD
OF THE WORLD'S
GREATEST MAGICIAN.
THE WORLD'S
GREATEST MAGICIAN.
PJ! WAIT'LL
YOU SEE THIS!
HIYA, MAX.
WHAT'S ALL THE--
WHOA!
PJ!
WHOAAA!
YOU!
YOU GOT 10 SECONDS
TO GET OUTTA MY DEN,
YA CLOTHES WRECKER.
FIRST, MIND IF I BORROW
YOUR TIE.
NOT AGAIN!
MAX, WHAT'RE YA DOIN'?
MAX, NO!
CHECK THIS, PEEJ.
ABRACADABRA!
HOW IN HECK
DID YA DO THAT?
THAT'S THE MOS
INCREDULOUS THING I SEEN
SINCE CYNTHIA SNODGRASS
GOT HER SNOOT STUCK
IN AN ICE CREAM TRUCK,
AND HAD TO
EAT HER WAY OUT OF
36 FLAVORS.
D-D-DID YOU SEE THAT?
YEAH.
HE MUSTA BEEN PRACTICING
ALL NIGHT.
I TAKE BACK
EVERYTHING I SAID
ABOUT THAT DUMB KID.
WHY, HE'S--
THE GREATEST MAGICIAN
IN THE WORLD?
YOU HAVEN'T SEEN
NOTHIN' YET.
UH, MAX--
WHOA
MAX, WHAT ARE YOU DOIN'
WITH THAT HAT?
THE GREAT GARBONZO
TOLD YOU IT WAS TROUBLE.
GREAT? HAH! HAH!
THE GUY WHO TOLD HOUDINI
TO GIVE UP MAGIC AND
BECOME A DERMOMETER?
CLOSE ENOUGH.
RELAX, PEEJ.
THIS HAT'S
MY MAGIC CARPE
TO FAME AND FORTUNE.
IT'S GARBONZO'S,
AND HE SAID
IT WASN'T FOR SALE.
AND YOU SAID WE'RE
RIDIN' THAT CARPET TOGETHER.
WELL, SURE WE ARE.
GO GET YOUR COSTUME
AND I'LL TEACH YOU
OUR NEW ACT.
NOT IF I CAN HELP IT.
[VACUUM WHIRRING]
WHOA!
HEY, THAT WASN'
PART OF THE ACT.
LET HIM OUT.
HE'S MY--
HEY, PAL-Y,
MAYBE AFTER YOU WIN
THAT TALENT SHOW,
YOU COULD COME
TO MY CAR LO
AND BE OUR PERMANEN
PRESTIDIGITATOR IN RESIDENCE.
THINK OF THE CROWDS.
THINK OF THE CARS
YOU'D MAKE DISCAPPEAR.
MAX, WE GOTTA TALK--
LATER, PJ.
ME AND THIS GENIUS
HAVE GOT A DEAL TO MAKE.
REAL GREA
ABOUT MAX BEING SO
SUCCESSFUL
ALL OF A SUDDEN,
ISN'T IT?
YEAH, SUDDEN.
SO WHAT DO YOU THINK,
BLACK OR PURPLE?
KID, YOU'RE
GONNA WOW 'EM.
AH, MY GOOD ASSISTANT.
HIYA, PEEJ.
HEY, WHERE'S
YOUR COSTUME?
MAX, MAN,
WE REALLY GOTTA TALK
ABOUT THAT HAT.
NO, WE GOTTA TALK.
UH, HANG ON, PJ.
I'LL BE RIGHT BACK.
KID, KID, KID,
YOU ARE TOO GOOD
FOR A TWO-BIT ASSISTANT,
ESPECIALLY ONE WHO
WANTS TO STEAL YOUR GLORY.
WHAT?
HE'S MY BEST FRIEND?
I HAVE SEEN IT HAPPEN, KID.
SOON AS YOU GET ON STAGE,
HE'S GONNA MAKE HIMSELF
LOOK LIKE THE STAR,
AND YOU LOOK LIKE A GEEK.
DON'T BELIEVE ME?
TRY HIM.
CUT HIS SOME SLACK,
JACK.
PJ'S COOL.
I'LL PROVE IT.
PEEJ, UM,
I WAS THINKIN'--
LET'S REHEARSE
THE FIRST TRICK.
MAX, IF YOU'D JUST LISTEN
FOR LIKE, YOU KNOW A SECOND--
I CALL I
THE FANTASTICAL
FLYING FLOWERS.
YOU HAND ME THE VASE,
AND I TURN THE POSIES
INTO PARROTS. GOT IT?
MAX
ABRACADABRA
WHAT'D I TELL YA?
WHAT'D I TELL YA?
YOU WANT THAT TO HAPPEN
WHEN YOU'RE ON
COAST-TO-COAST TV?
THAT WAS PRETTY GOOD
FOR AN ASSISTANT.
BUT I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING.
WHAT?
YOU'VE BEEN PRACTICING
BEHIND MY BACK,
STEALING MY TRICKS.
WHAT TRICKS?
OH, MAX,
YOU CAN'T SHUFFLE
TWO CARDS TOGETHER
WITHOUT BLOWING IT.
IT'S THAT HAT, MAN,
YOU GOTTA DUMP IT LIKE
A BAD HABIT.
AND BLOW
THE TALENT SHOW?
I'D RATHER DUMP YOU!
HEY, PJ,
C'MON BACK.
HA HA. FROM NOW ON,
IT'S JUST ME AND YOU, KID.
ME AND YOU.
AH, FULL HOUSE, KID.
MORE PEOPLE THAN THE NIGH
THE GREAT DOUG LEMMING
JUMPED OFF A CLIFF
INTO A BUCKET OF PORK RINDS.
YEAH. EVERYBODY HERE,
EXCEPT PJ.
FORGET HIM.
AFTER TONIGHT,
YOU'RE GONNA BE
THE MOST FAMOUS KID
ON THE PLANET.
OH, JUST THINK, FAMILY,
MY SON, OUR RELATIVE,
IS ASSISTANT TO
THE GREAT MAXINI HIMSELF.
BUT DAD,
DIDN'T YOU HEAR?
PJ QUIT THE SHOW.
QUIT? AND THROW AWAY
THE BEST MEAL TICKE
SINCE ALL-YOU-CAN-EAT NIGH
AT THE BIG BRONCO BILLY'S
BARBECUE BISTRO?
WHERE IS HE ANYHOW?
UH-UH.
NO WAY I'M GONNA HELP MAX
OUTTA THIS ONE.
STILL, I'VE GO
A BAD FEELING ABOUT THIS.
[APPLAUSE]
WELCOME TO THE SPOONERVILLE
TALENT EXTRAVAGANZA.
SO, UM, WELL, LET'S
STICK OUR HANDS TOGETHER,
SHALL WE,
AND PULL THEM APART,
THEN DO IT REALLY FAS
AS WE GIVE A BIG
SPOONERVILLE WELCOME
TO OUR FIRST ACT,
TAD AND TOMMY TIPPLESMITH,
THE TAP-DANCING TWINS!
TAD AND TOMMY--
I LOVE THESE TWO.
[MUSIC PLAYS]
AHOH, NO!
OKAY, MAXIE.
ALL SET TO BE
YOUR ASSISTANT.
BUT ARE YOU REALLY SURE
YOU DON'T WANT PJ TO DO IT?
YEAH, DAD,
I'M SURE.
YOU KNOW,
I'D HATE TO SEE YOU
LOSE YOUR BEST FRIEND
OVER JUS
A SILLY OLD HAT.
AND NOW,
SOON TO APPEAR A
PETE'S USED CARS,
IT'S TIME TO WELCOME THE--
LET'S SEE--
AH, THE WORLD'S
GREATEST MAGICIAN,
THE GREAT MAXINI!
THAT'S US! HYUCK!
BREAK AN ANKLE.
HOLY KING TUT!
WHAT'D YOU BRING
THAT OLD FOSSIL
INTO THE ACT FOR?
FOSSIL? THAT'S MY DAD.
I HAVE SEEN HAT STANDS
WITH MORE PERSONALITY.
YOU WANT TO DRAG
THAT DOOFUS AROUND
WHILE WE'RE PLAYIN'
AT THE PALLADIUM, HUH?
DUMP HIM.
YOU CAN'T GIVE ORDERS.
IF HE DOESN'T GO ON,
I DON'T GO ON.
ANYTHING YOU SAY.
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN,
DO NOT ADJUST YOUR EYES.
THE GREAT MAXINI
IS IN CONTROL
OF ALL YOU SEE AND HEAR.
WHATTA KID--
A MAGICIAN AND
A VENTRILOQUISTMAS.
WHAT ARE YOU DOIN'?
THIS IS MY SHOW!
NEWS FLASH, KID.
I SAID I NEEDED
YOUR HEAD.
I DIDN'T SAY NOTHIN'
ABOUT NEEDIN' YOU.
GET OFF OF ME, YOU--
NEED A HAND, KID?
HEY, MAXIE,
I DON'T REMEMBER
YOU MENTIONING
THAT IN THE ACT.
WHOA
HEY, WHAT'S GOING ON?
MAX!
KNOCK IT OFF, YOU!
OFF THE STAGE, TURKEY!
COOL!
HEY, MAX!
NOW TURN DAD
INTO CRANBERRY SAUCE
AND STUFFIN'!
NOBODY'S GONNA MAKE
A TURKEY OUTTA MY KID,
SEE?
CHANGE HIM BACK,
YA BABOON!
SOMEBODY SAY BABOON?
WAY TO GO, MAX!
MAX, WHAT THE HECK
DO YOU THINK YOU'RE
DOING UP THERE--WHOA!
OH, DEAR
OH, DEARY DEAR!
OH, MAX!
THIS HERE'S
AN AMAZING TRICK, SON,
BUT I THINK YOU BETTER
LET ME LOOSE!
DAD, I CAN'T STOP IT!
MR. GARBONZO! HE-E-ELP!
WHAT?
I'M GETTIN'
TOO OLD FOR THIS.
HUH? WHOWHAT
RELAX, KID.
THANKSGIVING'S NOT FOR
THREE MONTHS..
MR. GARBONZO, YOU GOTTA
STOP THE HAT!
AH, SORRY, PAL.
YOUR FRIEND'S
THE ONLY ONE
WHO CAN DO THAT.
QUICK! HOW?
AS LONG AS HE THINKS
HE'S THE GREATEST MAGICIAN
IN THE WORLD,
HIS GOT A SWELLED HEAD
AND THE HAT WON'T COME OFF.
SO THAT'S WHY
YOU SAID YOU WERE--
HEY, MAX!
TELL 'EM YOU STINK, MAN!
TELL 'EM YOU'RE BAD.
TELL 'EM--
I'M THE WORLD'S
WORST MAGICIAN!
NO-O-O!
OH!
WHOA-OA-OA!
HUH?
RATS.
JUST AS I WAS GONNA TELL
CYNTHIA SNODGRASS
MY DAD'S KING KONG.
DON'T SAY THAT, KID.
YOU'RE GREAT.
I'M NOT!
YOU ARE! YOU ARE!
YOU'RE COLOSSAL!
YOU'RE TERRIFIC.
STUPENDOUS!
NOT! NOT! NOT!
HAT'S ALL, FOLKS.
HA HA HA
OH, THANKS, MR. GARBONZO.
WELL, LADIES AND GERMS,
THAT CONCLUDES OUR SHOW.
BUT YOU CAN SEE
THE GREAT MAXI--
UH, THE GREAT,
PLAIN-OLD MAXINI
TOMORROW A
PETE'S USED CARS.
FORGET IT!
DEAL'S OFF!
THAT GOOF WAS NOTHIN'
BUT A WASTE OF SPACE
AH, WHO AM I
TRYIN' TO KID?
I'M NO MAGICIAN.
I'M NOBODY.
THAT'S NOT TRUE,
MAXIE.
YOU'RE THE BEST SON
A DAD COULD HAVE.
AND YOU'RE PJ's
BEST FRIEND, TOO..
BEST BUDDIES FOREVER,
RIGHT?
AH, MAGIC WASN'
FOR ME, ANYWAY.
ME, NEITHER, MAN.
HECK, ONLY THING
I CAN MAKE DISAPPEAR
IS PIZZAS.
BUT YOU KNOW,
THERE IS A WHOLE YEAR
'TIL THE NEXT TALENT SHOW.
BY THEN, WE COULD HAVE
THE MOST STUPENDOUS AC
IN THE UNIVERSE.
MAX--
WHAT IF WE GO
A GIGANTIC
HOT-AIR BALLOON?
MAX!
YEAH, YEAH,
WE'LL TAKE OF FROM
THE TOP OF THE GYM
AND WE'LL BUNGEE JUMP INTO
YOUR DAD'S SWIMMING POOL!
FULL OF--FULL OF
CHOCOLATE TAPIOCA.
AW, PEEJ,
IT'LL BE GREAT.
YOU AND ME,
TOGETHER.
MAX!
♪♪
AH-HYUCK.
H-H-H-HIT IT ♪
LIKE FATHER, LIKE SON ♪
YOU'RE ALWAYS
NUMBER ONE ♪
YES!
THERE'S BUDDIES,
THERE'S PALS ♪
YEAH ♪
YOU ALWAYS SEEM
TO WORK THINGS OUT ♪
CAN'T YOU SEE
YOU'RE TWO OF A KIND ♪
LOOKIN' FOR
A REAL GOOD TIME? ♪
WHAA-OOO-HO-HO!
A REAL GOOD
TIME ♪
YAAH-HOO-HOO!
REPOR
TO THE GOOF TROOP ♪
AND WE'LL ALWAYS
STICK TOGETHER ♪
ALWAYS
STICK TOGETHER ♪
WE'RE THE GOOF TROOP ♪
THE BEST OF FRIENDS
FOREVER ♪
SIDE BY SIDE
WHEREVER WE GO ♪
WE'RE ALWAYS
READY TO ROLL ♪
NOW
GIMME A BEAT ♪
WE'RE THE GOOF TROOP ♪
AND WE ALWAYS
STICK TOGETHER ♪
WE'RE THE GOOF TROOP ♪
THE BEST OF FRIENDS
FOREVER ♪
NOW WE'RE CALLING
EVERYONE ♪
COME ALONG
AND JOIN THE FUN ♪
REPORT TO
THE GOOF TROOP ♪
LA DO BE DA BOP
LA BA DO BOP ♪
YEAH!
[PJ]
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN,
BOYS AND GIRLS,
PREPARE TO BE
INCREDIBLIZED
BY THE GREATES
MAGIC SHOW
IN THE HISTORY OF
THIS HOUSE!
PRESENTING
FOR YOUR AMAZEMENT,
THE GREAT MAXINI!
TA-DA!
HOW YA DOIN',
LADIES AND GERMS?
WE'RE GONNA MAKE THIS
DISAPPEAR BEFORE VERY
YOUR NOSE.
HOW DOES HE DO I
YOU ASK? IT'S MAGIC!
ALL RIGHT,
LET'S HEAR I
FOR GRAVITY!
PICK A CARD,
ANY CARD,
IT'S ALL PART OF
THE SHOW, FOLKS.
HAND'S QUICKER
THAN THE EYE.
NOTHIN' UP MY SLEEVE.
PRESTO!
O.K., PITCHER OF
ORDINARY MOO JUICE.
A WAVE OF THE WAND,
AND ABRACADABRA, AND--
WATCH OUT!
TA-DA!
GIMME A BREAK.
HMM. UH. THAT'S
DIFFERENT.
[YAWN]
WELL?
YOU LIKE IT?
UH, I GOTTA GO
MELT SOME CRAYONS.
DAD, YOU EVER SEE
ANYTHING LIKE THA
IN YOUR WHOLE
ENTIRE LIFE?
WELL, THEM TRICKS
WERE VERYTRICKY.
YES! COAST-TO-COAST RAVES
FOR THE GREAT MAXINI.
ARE WE GONNA ACE
THIS SCHOOL TALENT SHOW
OR WHAT?
WE'RE GONNA HAVE
THOSE JUDGES SCREAMIN'.
YEAH,
RIGHT FOR THE EXITS.
BUT DAD JUST SAID--
HEY, WHEN THAT'S ALL
YOUR DAD CAN SAY, MAN,
YOU KNOW YOU STINK.
STINK?
LIKE A SKUNK
WITH B.O.
MAYBE IF YOU DID
A GOOD TAP-DANCE
OR GARGLED GOLDFISH
OR SOMETHIN' '.
OH, YOU'RE SAYIN'
THE ACT NEEDS
A LITTLE POLISH.
MAX, IT NEEDS
DRY CLEANING.
GOTCHA.
LIGHTING'S ALL WRONG.
AND WE NEED
BETTER COSTUMES.
TRY SACKS ON OUR HEADS.
AND OUR TRICKS ARE
REAL RE-TREADS.
I MEAN,
HOW MANY GUYS HAVE YOU SEEN
PUT MILK IN THEIR HATS?
AND POUR IT ON
THEIR HEADS?
UHONE.
SO FIRST THING TOMORROW
WE HIT THE MAGIC SHOP,
AND GET SOME REAL TRICKS.
THE TALENT SHOW'S
ONLY THE BEGINNING,
PEEJ.
WE'RE RIDIN'
A MAGIC CARPE
TO FAME AND FORTUNE.
YEAH,
DOWN A DEAD END STREET.
HOW MUCH MONEY
YOU GOT, PEEJ?
10 BUCKS.
HOW MUCH YOU GOT?
10 BUCKS!
COME ON.
UMHELLO?
[COUGH COUGH COUGH]
[COUGH COUGH COUGH
COUGH COUGH]
[COUGH COUGH]
[COUGH COUGH
COUGH COUGH]
WAY COOL!
A REAL MAGICIAN!
BINGO, BIG BOY.
PRESENTING
THE GREAT GARBONZO!
THAT'S ME--
[GRUMBLE] GARBONZO.
AND I AM THE GREAT MAXINI.
PRESENTING MY ASSISTANT--
PJ THE SPLENDID.
YO.
YEAH,
ALWAYS HAPPY TO MEE
A FELLOW
HOCUS-POCUSER.
SO, WHAT CAN I DO
FOR YOU, MAXINI?
DON'T YOU TELL ME,
YOU WANT TO BUY A TRICK,
RIGHT?
NOW, SEEING AS HOW
YOU'RE IN THE MAGIC
BUSINESS, TOO,
I TELL YA WHA
I'M GONNA DO.
PRESENTING
THE AMAZING WILTING
FLOWER TRICK!
WA-BA-DA-BA-BA-DA!
SWAMIBEGONIA.
[HUMMING]
OH, MAN.
UH, WE'RE SORTA
LOOKIN' FOR SOMETHING
WITH MORE, UH
PIZZAZZ. I KNEW IT.
A KID WHO'S ON HIS WAY
TO THE TOP.
THE ENCHANTED
[HUMMING]
CARD TRICK.
GUARANTEED
TO KNOCK 'EM COLD.
ONLY 3 BUCKS.
C'MON, MAX. THIS
HOCUSER'S BOGUS.
HE'S NOT A REAL MAGICIAN.
HE DOESN'T EVEN
HAVE A HAT.
HEY, HOW ABOU
THAT ONE?
THE LEVITATING
BIRTHDAY CAKE. WOO!
A FINE CHOICE,
MR. MAXINI--
OR, UH,
CAN I CALL YOU GREAT?
A BARGAIN AT 5 BUCKS.
HIDEE-HI, HODEE-HO.
FROSTING FLY.
HERE WE GO.
MAX,
LET'S BUG OUTTA HERE.
GIMME A BREAK, KID,
I'M JUST GETTIN' WARMED UP.
BINKY DINKY DOUBLE FUDGE.
ARISE OR I'LL TURN YOU
INTO SLUDGE.
NO! STOP! HE'S JUST A KID!
ALL RIGHT! ALL RIGHT!
I'M NOT GREAT!
I'M THE WORLD'S
WORST MAGICIAN!
WHOA! HOW MUCH
FOR THAT HAT?
HAT? HAT?
WHAT HAT? WHAT HAT?
THAT'S IN THAT--
FORGET IT, KID.
NOTHIN' BUT TROUBLE,
NOTHIN' BUT TROUBLE.
HERE, HAVE A COUPLE OF
DISAPPEARING RABBITS.
TAKE ONE OF THESE
AND A COUPLE OF THOSE.
HEY, MAGIC SCISSORS.
CUT UP ANYTHING AND
STICK IT TOGETHER.
HAT'S NOT FOR SALE.
HEY. MAGIC YO-YO.
WELL, BUT--THANKS,
BUT THAT HAT--
SAW SOME LADIES IN HALF.
NO LADIES? SAW SOME GUYS
IN HALF.
YEAH, BUT THE HAT!
BUT I CAN'T AFFORD THIS!
KNOCK 'EM DEAD, KID,
IT'S FREE, IT'S FREE.
O.K.?
FREE,
ALL RIGHT, KID?
ALL RIGHT.
C'MON, PEEJ.
YOU HEARD THE MAN.
WE'RE GONNA
KNOCK 'EM DEAD.
[DOORBELL RINGS]
HEY, NEIGHBOR.
BORROW A CUP OF SUGAR?
WELL,
WHILE I'M HERE,
MIGHT AS WELL BORROW
SOME OF THIS, AND, UH--
OOH, I'LL TAKE THA
AND RECYCLE IT FOR HIM.
THE MAGNIFICENT,
THE INCREDIBLE,
THEUH
MEGA-COOL.
OH, YEAH. THANKS.
MEGA-COOL, UH,
GREAT MAXINI.
TA-DA! HIYA, HIYA,
LADIES AND GERMS.
I JUST FLEW IN
FROM MAGICLAND,
AND BOY,
ARE MY ARMS TIRED.
HEY, ON WITH THE SHOW,
AS MY ASSISTAN
PJ THE SPLENDID
DARES ME TO UNTANGLE
THE MYSTERIOUS
MAGIC RINGS.
WITH A FLIP AND A FLAP
AND AN ABRACADABRA.
KIDS. SHOWS YOU
WHAT HAPPENS
WHEN THEY DON'
GET ENOUGH TV.
TA-DA!
HUH? HEY!
WHA--WHA--WHAT?
WHAT--HEY!
HEY.
FOR MY NEXT ILLUSION,
I'LL NEED A VOLUNTEER
FROM OUR VAST AUDIENCE.
ANYONE? HUH, HUH?
THANK YOU, SIR.
A SNIPPETY-SNIP
OF THE MAGIC SCISSORS,
AND YOUR TIE IS RUINED.
BUT--HA HA--NEVER FEAR.
A WAVE OF THE WAND,
AND ABRACADABRA--
AND--
OH, GAWRSH.
WHAT DO YA THINK
YOU'RE DOIN'?
UH, THE INCREDIBLY
MYSTERIOUS APPEARING
SCARVES TRICK.
HA HA HA HA!
OOH, BABY! HA HA!
WOO HOO.
SO WHAT WE'RE SEEIN' IS
THE ACT NEEDS JUS
A LITTLE MOREPRACTICE?
THAT GOOF COULD PRACTICE
TILL HE'S IN THE 47th GRADE,
AND HE STILL WON'
WIN THE TALENT SHOW!
AND YOU.
DON'T YOU LET ME
CATCH YOU
LETTIN' HIM MAKE YOU
LOOK LIKE A GEEK AGAIN!
NOW, WAIT A MINUTE, PETE!
THAT'S MY SON
YOU'RE TALKIN' ABOUT!
AND DON'T LET ME CATCH YOU
LETTIN' ME BORROW ANYTHING
WHILE I'M CATCHIN' YOU
AND LETTIN' YOU BORROW I
FROM ME AGAIN!
UH, MAX, YOU KNOW
THEY'RE NICE TRICKS,
BUT MAYBE YOU OUGHTA WAI
TILL NEXT YEAR'S TALENT SHOW.
LIKE THEY ALWAYS SAY,
THE EARLY BIRD
ALWAYS, UH
GETS THE WORM AND
HOW'S IT GOING, MAX?
AH, IT ISN'T GOIN'
ANYWHERE.
FORGET IT, PEEJ.
I'M TAKIN'
THIS STUFF BACK.
YEAH, BUT WHAT ABOU
THE TALENT SHOW?
NO TALENT, NO SHOW.
FAME AND FORTUNE.
YEAH, RIGHT.
I CAN'T EVEN PLAY
THE HARMONICA.
MR. GARBONZO!
HELLO!
IT'S THE NOT-SO-GREA
MAXINI.
M-M-MR. GARBONZO,
I'M RETURNING YOUR STUFF!
NEVER WANTED TO BE
A MAGICIAN ANYWAY.
[CREAK]
Voice: DON'T BE
SO SURE, KID.
Voice:
SO YOU WANT TO BE
A MAGICIAN?
WHO SAID THAT?
WHERE ARE YOU?
TA-DA!
CARD TRICKS GOT YOU DOWN?
CAN'T PULL A RABBIT OUT OF
A HAT?
DO I HAVE THE ANSWER FOR YOU!
Y-Y-YOU'RE TALKING!
BET YOUR BEANIE, BINKY.
BUT YOU'RE JUST A HAT!
JUST A HAT!
WAS GEORGE WASHINGTON
JUST A GUY WITH BAD TEETH?
WAS TOM EDISON JUST A GUY
WHO NEEDED A LIGHT?
KID, KID,
I'M YOUR TICKET TO
FAME AND FORTUNE.
TRY THIS ON.
PRESENTING
THE GREAT MAXINI!
LIKE IT, LIKE IT?
YOU DO? GREAT.
GOES WITH THE SHOES
HUH?
I GOTTA BE DREAMIN'.
A TALKIN' HAT TELLIN'
THE WORLD'S WORS
MAGICIAN HE'S GREAT?
SHH! SHH! QUICK!
IX-NAY! IX-NAY!
DON'T EVER SAY THAT.
YOU'RE GONNA BE GREAT.
YOU ARE GREAT!
YOU ALWAYS BEEN GREAT!
COME ON. REALLY?
REALLY? REALLY? REALLY?
DID HOUDINI ESCAPE
THE GAPING JAWS OF
A RABID CHICKEN, HUH?
I SAW IT, I TELL YA,
IT CHANGED MY WHOLE LIFE.
YOU NEED MAGIC TO GET AHEAD.
I NEED A HEAD
TO GET AHEAD.
A HAT LIKE ME IS NOTHIN'
WITHOUT ONE.
OH, WHAT A TEAM WE'LL MAKE.
GO AHEAD, GO AHEAD,
DO A TRICK.
BUT I DON'T KNOW
ANY TRICKS.
TRUST ME.
HOLD OUT YOUR HANDS.
GOTTA MAKE WITH
THE MUMBO-JUMBO, KID.
OH. UHUH
ABRACADABRA.
WOW. I DID THAT?
I MIGHTA HELPED
A LITTLE,
BUT SURE YOU DID.
SO WHAT DO YOU SAY
WE GOT A DEAL?
BUT GARBONZO SAID
YOU WEREN'T FOR SALE.
HE SAID YOU WERE
NOTHIN' BUT TROUBLE.
HEY, THAT WAS THE GUY
WHO TOLD HOUDINI
TO GIVE UP MAGIC AND
BECOME A DERMATOLOGIST.
DO NOT WORRY.
I'LL SQUARE I
WITH THE GARBONSTER.
AW, C'MON, C'MON,
C'MON.
TAKE ME HOME
WITH YA, PLEASE!
WITH CHERRIES AND
GUMMI DWOPS ON TOP!
I DON'T KNOW.
GO AHEAD,
TAKE A CHANCE.
FAME AND FORTUNE,
KID.
FAME AND FORTUNE.
THE GREAT MAXINI!
WELL
MAYBE JUS
FOR THE TALENT SHOW.
I GUESS IT'S O.K.
OF COURSE IT'S O.K.
AND NOW, THE MOMEN
YOU'VE BEEN WAITING FOR,
THE ONE, THE ONLY,
THE GREAT MAXINI!
ABRACADABRA!
[ROAR]
[TWEETING]
[RING]
OHHWHAT A DREAM.
TALKING HATS
WHEW.
NEXT I'LL BE SEEIN'
PINK ELEPHANTS.
I PREFER PURPLE
MYSELF.
[GASP]
Y-YOU'RE REAL!
REAL AS THE DAY
I WAS STITCHED.
AND I AM RESIDING
ON THE HEAD
OF THE WORLD'S
GREATEST MAGICIAN.
THE WORLD'S
GREATEST MAGICIAN.
PJ! WAIT'LL
YOU SEE THIS!
HIYA, MAX.
WHAT'S ALL THE--
WHOA!
PJ!
WHOAAA!
YOU!
YOU GOT 10 SECONDS
TO GET OUTTA MY DEN,
YA CLOTHES WRECKER.
FIRST, MIND IF I BORROW
YOUR TIE.
NOT AGAIN!
MAX, WHAT'RE YA DOIN'?
MAX, NO!
CHECK THIS, PEEJ.
ABRACADABRA!
HOW IN HECK
DID YA DO THAT?
THAT'S THE MOS
INCREDULOUS THING I SEEN
SINCE CYNTHIA SNODGRASS
GOT HER SNOOT STUCK
IN AN ICE CREAM TRUCK,
AND HAD TO
EAT HER WAY OUT OF
36 FLAVORS.
D-D-DID YOU SEE THAT?
YEAH.
HE MUSTA BEEN PRACTICING
ALL NIGHT.
I TAKE BACK
EVERYTHING I SAID
ABOUT THAT DUMB KID.
WHY, HE'S--
THE GREATEST MAGICIAN
IN THE WORLD?
YOU HAVEN'T SEEN
NOTHIN' YET.
UH, MAX--
WHOA
MAX, WHAT ARE YOU DOIN'
WITH THAT HAT?
THE GREAT GARBONZO
TOLD YOU IT WAS TROUBLE.
GREAT? HAH! HAH!
THE GUY WHO TOLD HOUDINI
TO GIVE UP MAGIC AND
BECOME A DERMOMETER?
CLOSE ENOUGH.
RELAX, PEEJ.
THIS HAT'S
MY MAGIC CARPE
TO FAME AND FORTUNE.
IT'S GARBONZO'S,
AND HE SAID
IT WASN'T FOR SALE.
AND YOU SAID WE'RE
RIDIN' THAT CARPET TOGETHER.
WELL, SURE WE ARE.
GO GET YOUR COSTUME
AND I'LL TEACH YOU
OUR NEW ACT.
NOT IF I CAN HELP IT.
[VACUUM WHIRRING]
WHOA!
HEY, THAT WASN'
PART OF THE ACT.
LET HIM OUT.
HE'S MY--
HEY, PAL-Y,
MAYBE AFTER YOU WIN
THAT TALENT SHOW,
YOU COULD COME
TO MY CAR LO
AND BE OUR PERMANEN
PRESTIDIGITATOR IN RESIDENCE.
THINK OF THE CROWDS.
THINK OF THE CARS
YOU'D MAKE DISCAPPEAR.
MAX, WE GOTTA TALK--
LATER, PJ.
ME AND THIS GENIUS
HAVE GOT A DEAL TO MAKE.
REAL GREA
ABOUT MAX BEING SO
SUCCESSFUL
ALL OF A SUDDEN,
ISN'T IT?
YEAH, SUDDEN.
SO WHAT DO YOU THINK,
BLACK OR PURPLE?
KID, YOU'RE
GONNA WOW 'EM.
AH, MY GOOD ASSISTANT.
HIYA, PEEJ.
HEY, WHERE'S
YOUR COSTUME?
MAX, MAN,
WE REALLY GOTTA TALK
ABOUT THAT HAT.
NO, WE GOTTA TALK.
UH, HANG ON, PJ.
I'LL BE RIGHT BACK.
KID, KID, KID,
YOU ARE TOO GOOD
FOR A TWO-BIT ASSISTANT,
ESPECIALLY ONE WHO
WANTS TO STEAL YOUR GLORY.
WHAT?
HE'S MY BEST FRIEND?
I HAVE SEEN IT HAPPEN, KID.
SOON AS YOU GET ON STAGE,
HE'S GONNA MAKE HIMSELF
LOOK LIKE THE STAR,
AND YOU LOOK LIKE A GEEK.
DON'T BELIEVE ME?
TRY HIM.
CUT HIS SOME SLACK,
JACK.
PJ'S COOL.
I'LL PROVE IT.
PEEJ, UM,
I WAS THINKIN'--
LET'S REHEARSE
THE FIRST TRICK.
MAX, IF YOU'D JUST LISTEN
FOR LIKE, YOU KNOW A SECOND--
I CALL I
THE FANTASTICAL
FLYING FLOWERS.
YOU HAND ME THE VASE,
AND I TURN THE POSIES
INTO PARROTS. GOT IT?
MAX
ABRACADABRA
WHAT'D I TELL YA?
WHAT'D I TELL YA?
YOU WANT THAT TO HAPPEN
WHEN YOU'RE ON
COAST-TO-COAST TV?
THAT WAS PRETTY GOOD
FOR AN ASSISTANT.
BUT I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING.
WHAT?
YOU'VE BEEN PRACTICING
BEHIND MY BACK,
STEALING MY TRICKS.
WHAT TRICKS?
OH, MAX,
YOU CAN'T SHUFFLE
TWO CARDS TOGETHER
WITHOUT BLOWING IT.
IT'S THAT HAT, MAN,
YOU GOTTA DUMP IT LIKE
A BAD HABIT.
AND BLOW
THE TALENT SHOW?
I'D RATHER DUMP YOU!
HEY, PJ,
C'MON BACK.
HA HA. FROM NOW ON,
IT'S JUST ME AND YOU, KID.
ME AND YOU.
AH, FULL HOUSE, KID.
MORE PEOPLE THAN THE NIGH
THE GREAT DOUG LEMMING
JUMPED OFF A CLIFF
INTO A BUCKET OF PORK RINDS.
YEAH. EVERYBODY HERE,
EXCEPT PJ.
FORGET HIM.
AFTER TONIGHT,
YOU'RE GONNA BE
THE MOST FAMOUS KID
ON THE PLANET.
OH, JUST THINK, FAMILY,
MY SON, OUR RELATIVE,
IS ASSISTANT TO
THE GREAT MAXINI HIMSELF.
BUT DAD,
DIDN'T YOU HEAR?
PJ QUIT THE SHOW.
QUIT? AND THROW AWAY
THE BEST MEAL TICKE
SINCE ALL-YOU-CAN-EAT NIGH
AT THE BIG BRONCO BILLY'S
BARBECUE BISTRO?
WHERE IS HE ANYHOW?
UH-UH.
NO WAY I'M GONNA HELP MAX
OUTTA THIS ONE.
STILL, I'VE GO
A BAD FEELING ABOUT THIS.
[APPLAUSE]
WELCOME TO THE SPOONERVILLE
TALENT EXTRAVAGANZA.
SO, UM, WELL, LET'S
STICK OUR HANDS TOGETHER,
SHALL WE,
AND PULL THEM APART,
THEN DO IT REALLY FAS
AS WE GIVE A BIG
SPOONERVILLE WELCOME
TO OUR FIRST ACT,
TAD AND TOMMY TIPPLESMITH,
THE TAP-DANCING TWINS!
TAD AND TOMMY--
I LOVE THESE TWO.
[MUSIC PLAYS]
AHOH, NO!
OKAY, MAXIE.
ALL SET TO BE
YOUR ASSISTANT.
BUT ARE YOU REALLY SURE
YOU DON'T WANT PJ TO DO IT?
YEAH, DAD,
I'M SURE.
YOU KNOW,
I'D HATE TO SEE YOU
LOSE YOUR BEST FRIEND
OVER JUS
A SILLY OLD HAT.
AND NOW,
SOON TO APPEAR A
PETE'S USED CARS,
IT'S TIME TO WELCOME THE--
LET'S SEE--
AH, THE WORLD'S
GREATEST MAGICIAN,
THE GREAT MAXINI!
THAT'S US! HYUCK!
BREAK AN ANKLE.
HOLY KING TUT!
WHAT'D YOU BRING
THAT OLD FOSSIL
INTO THE ACT FOR?
FOSSIL? THAT'S MY DAD.
I HAVE SEEN HAT STANDS
WITH MORE PERSONALITY.
YOU WANT TO DRAG
THAT DOOFUS AROUND
WHILE WE'RE PLAYIN'
AT THE PALLADIUM, HUH?
DUMP HIM.
YOU CAN'T GIVE ORDERS.
IF HE DOESN'T GO ON,
I DON'T GO ON.
ANYTHING YOU SAY.
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN,
DO NOT ADJUST YOUR EYES.
THE GREAT MAXINI
IS IN CONTROL
OF ALL YOU SEE AND HEAR.
WHATTA KID--
A MAGICIAN AND
A VENTRILOQUISTMAS.
WHAT ARE YOU DOIN'?
THIS IS MY SHOW!
NEWS FLASH, KID.
I SAID I NEEDED
YOUR HEAD.
I DIDN'T SAY NOTHIN'
ABOUT NEEDIN' YOU.
GET OFF OF ME, YOU--
NEED A HAND, KID?
HEY, MAXIE,
I DON'T REMEMBER
YOU MENTIONING
THAT IN THE ACT.
WHOA
HEY, WHAT'S GOING ON?
MAX!
KNOCK IT OFF, YOU!
OFF THE STAGE, TURKEY!
COOL!
HEY, MAX!
NOW TURN DAD
INTO CRANBERRY SAUCE
AND STUFFIN'!
NOBODY'S GONNA MAKE
A TURKEY OUTTA MY KID,
SEE?
CHANGE HIM BACK,
YA BABOON!
SOMEBODY SAY BABOON?
WAY TO GO, MAX!
MAX, WHAT THE HECK
DO YOU THINK YOU'RE
DOING UP THERE--WHOA!
OH, DEAR
OH, DEARY DEAR!
OH, MAX!
THIS HERE'S
AN AMAZING TRICK, SON,
BUT I THINK YOU BETTER
LET ME LOOSE!
DAD, I CAN'T STOP IT!
MR. GARBONZO! HE-E-ELP!
WHAT?
I'M GETTIN'
TOO OLD FOR THIS.
HUH? WHOWHAT
RELAX, KID.
THANKSGIVING'S NOT FOR
THREE MONTHS..
MR. GARBONZO, YOU GOTTA
STOP THE HAT!
AH, SORRY, PAL.
YOUR FRIEND'S
THE ONLY ONE
WHO CAN DO THAT.
QUICK! HOW?
AS LONG AS HE THINKS
HE'S THE GREATEST MAGICIAN
IN THE WORLD,
HIS GOT A SWELLED HEAD
AND THE HAT WON'T COME OFF.
SO THAT'S WHY
YOU SAID YOU WERE--
HEY, MAX!
TELL 'EM YOU STINK, MAN!
TELL 'EM YOU'RE BAD.
TELL 'EM--
I'M THE WORLD'S
WORST MAGICIAN!
NO-O-O!
OH!
WHOA-OA-OA!
HUH?
RATS.
JUST AS I WAS GONNA TELL
CYNTHIA SNODGRASS
MY DAD'S KING KONG.
DON'T SAY THAT, KID.
YOU'RE GREAT.
I'M NOT!
YOU ARE! YOU ARE!
YOU'RE COLOSSAL!
YOU'RE TERRIFIC.
STUPENDOUS!
NOT! NOT! NOT!
HAT'S ALL, FOLKS.
HA HA HA
OH, THANKS, MR. GARBONZO.
WELL, LADIES AND GERMS,
THAT CONCLUDES OUR SHOW.
BUT YOU CAN SEE
THE GREAT MAXI--
UH, THE GREAT,
PLAIN-OLD MAXINI
TOMORROW A
PETE'S USED CARS.
FORGET IT!
DEAL'S OFF!
THAT GOOF WAS NOTHIN'
BUT A WASTE OF SPACE
AH, WHO AM I
TRYIN' TO KID?
I'M NO MAGICIAN.
I'M NOBODY.
THAT'S NOT TRUE,
MAXIE.
YOU'RE THE BEST SON
A DAD COULD HAVE.
AND YOU'RE PJ's
BEST FRIEND, TOO..
BEST BUDDIES FOREVER,
RIGHT?
AH, MAGIC WASN'
FOR ME, ANYWAY.
ME, NEITHER, MAN.
HECK, ONLY THING
I CAN MAKE DISAPPEAR
IS PIZZAS.
BUT YOU KNOW,
THERE IS A WHOLE YEAR
'TIL THE NEXT TALENT SHOW.
BY THEN, WE COULD HAVE
THE MOST STUPENDOUS AC
IN THE UNIVERSE.
MAX--
WHAT IF WE GO
A GIGANTIC
HOT-AIR BALLOON?
MAX!
YEAH, YEAH,
WE'LL TAKE OF FROM
THE TOP OF THE GYM
AND WE'LL BUNGEE JUMP INTO
YOUR DAD'S SWIMMING POOL!
FULL OF--FULL OF
CHOCOLATE TAPIOCA.
AW, PEEJ,
IT'LL BE GREAT.
YOU AND ME,
TOGETHER.
MAX!