Heathcliff & the Catillac Cats (1984) s01e24 Episode Script

HEATHCLIFF, HEATHCLIFF
NO ONE SHOULD ♪
TERRIFY THEIR
NEIGHBORHOOD ♪
BUT HEATHCLIFF
JUST WON'T BE UNDONE ♪
PLAYING PRANKS
ON EVERYONE ♪
THERE'S A RACE
TO BE ON TOP ♪
THE COMPETITION
DOESN'T STOP ♪
HE'S MIXING
WITH THE LADIES FAIR ♪
BEING CHARMING,
DEBONAIR ♪
THE GAME
WILL REIGN SUPREME ♪
AND NO ONE
CAN DENY-Y-Y-Y ♪
THEY'LL MAKE SOME HISTORY
AND ALWAYS HAVE
AN ALIBI-I-I ♪
SO JOIN IN THE JUBILEE
THE CATS ARE GREA
THEY'LL ALL AGREE ♪
YOU'LL FIND IN EACH CALAMITY
THE CAT'S SUPERIORITY
OH O-OH O-O-OH O-OH
O-O-OH OH
OH-OH O-O-OH O-OH ♪
HEATHCLIFF, HEATHCLIFF
NO ONE SHOULD ♪
TERRIFY THEIR
NEIGHBORHOOD ♪
BUT HEATHCLIFF
JUST WON'T BE UNDONE ♪
YOU SHOULD REALIZE
HE CAN WIN IT WITH YOU
BORED, BORED, BORED.
NO IGGY TO PLAY WITH.
NOTHING GOOD TO EAT.
I HAVE HAD ENOUGH.
[SQUEAKING]
- AAH
HEATHCLIFF, ARE YOU MESSING
WITH THOSE MICE AGAIN?
STOP IT!
- WHY, HEATHCLIFF,
WITH IGGY AWAY AT AUNT IRMA'S,
HE'S GOT NOBODY TO PLAY WITH.
HE'S GETTING CABIN FEVER.
- NO, GRANDMA.
I AM GETTING CABIN FEVER!
AND IF I COME DOWN WITH
A BAD CASE OF CABIN FEVER,
IT'S ALL HIS FAULT.
- WELL, YOU KNOW WHAT YOU NEED
TO DO, GRANDPA.
YOU NEED TO GET OUT.
- OUT? IN THIS?
- BESIDES, THERE'S SOMETHING
WE NEED FROM THE STORE.
[WHISPERING]
- EH?
- [WHISPERING]
CAT FOOD.
WE'RE OUT OF CAT FOOD.
IF HE HAD A BIG MEAL,
THEN MAYBE HE WOULD SETTLE DOWN.
- I'LL MAKE SURE
HE SETTLES DOWN.
AH!
- HE'S ON A RAMPAGE TONIGHT.
- THIS COULD GO ON FOR HOURS.
- HEATHCLIFF!
- GET HIM SOME FOOD, QUICK.
- I CAN'T TAKE ANYMORE OF THIS.
- I KNOW, DEAR.
- AND I'VE GOT TO WALK, TOO.
IMPOSSIBLE TO DRIVE A CAR
IN THIS SNOW.
- I KNOW, DEAR.
- DRAT. I JUST RUINED MY HAT.
- WELL, AS LONG AS YOU'RE
IN THE STORE ANYWAY, DEAR,
GET YOURSELF
A NEW HAT.
- WELL, IF HE'S NOT HAPPY
AFTER THIS,
I'LL THROW HIM OUTSIDE
IN THE COLD.
- YES, DEAR.
AHH
- [LAUGHTER]
- HUH?
- HUH?
- RARH!
"THROW HIM OUT IN THE COLD,"
HUH?
HA HA! IT'S A WINTER WONDERLAND
OUT THERE.
AND YOU GET TO PLAY IN IT.
YES, FOLKS, WE'VE JUST CREATED
A NEW WINTER SPORT.
HA HA!
- WINTER SPORT, HUH?
WE'LL SEE WHO'S A SPORT.
[GROWLING]
- HA HA!
WELL, THIS IS ONLY
THE BEGINNING, FOLKS,
FOR THE FABULOUS NEW
WINTER GAME, RAT RACE. HA HA!
- HEATHCLIFF!
SHUT THAT WINDOW!
NOW, YOU BEHAVE YOURSELF,
HEATHCLIFF.
- BRAVE, HEARTY,
MOUSEY MOUNTAINEERS.
WILL THEY SURVIVE THE HAZARDS
OF AVALANCHE? HA HA!
- AAH!
- AAH!
- REVENGE!
LET'S SEE.
THE SNOWMAN! I'VE GOT IT!
- HEATHCLIFF!
I FEEL A DRAFT AGAIN.
NOW, CLOSE THAT WINDOW!
- SORRY, YOU GUYS,
BUT GRANDMA SAID.
- WAIT! LOOK WHAT WE FOUND!
- HUH?
- YIPPEE!
I GOT HIM!
- SOME KIND OF MOUSE TRICK,
NO DOUBT.
- OH, HEATHCLIFF, HELP ME.
- BETTER CHECK IT OUT,
MR. HERO CAT.
- OH, SONIA? WHATEVER IT IS,
THAT MOUSE IS GETTING
ON MY NERVES,
- [LAUGHTER]
- STOP THESE AWFUL MICE,
HEATHCLIFF!
HELP ME! PLEASE!
- I'M GONNA PUT A STOP TO THIS.
SONIA!
- [LAUGHTER]
- HEATHCLIFF, I TOLD YOU
ABOUT THIS WINDOW.
NAUGHTY BOY. WHERE ARE YOU?
ASHAMED, ARE YOU?
HIDING FROM ME?
WELL, THIS IS THE LAST TIME.
- ABOMINABLE SNOW MICE.
- NOW MAYBE I CAN RELAX.
- OPEN UP!
LET ME IN !
- PARTY TIME!
HA HA!
WHAT'S THIS?
A SUBLIME BLIZZARD.
- LET ME IN!
IT'S COLD OUT HERE!
- LOOK. HE'S GETTING HO
UNDER THE COLLAR.
- OPEN UP THIS WINDOW!
- SORRY, GUY.
REMEMBER WHAT GRANDMA SAID.
- WHAT ARE YOU LAUGHING AT?
THAT'S MORE LIKE IT, CHUM.
YOU LET ME IN NOW!
- MARCIA, WHAT'S
THAT TERRIBLE NOISE?
- IT'S ONLY THE WIND, JOHN.
I TELL YOU, YOU'RE
HEARING THINGS AGAIN.
- LOOK AT THAT FORM!
POETRY IN MOTION.
PERFECTION ON ICE.
BRAVO!
- HOT CHOCOLATE?
- DON'T MIND IF I DO.
MARSHMALLOW?
- CHEERS!
MMM. DELICIOUS!
- [SNORING]
- SO WARM AND COZY HERE.
- TO THE SWEET LIFE.
[RASPBERRIES]
- LET'S WATCH THE NEWS.
- CITIZENS ARE WARNED
TO BE ON THE ALERT.
AT THIS MOMENT,
POLICE ARE IN PURSUI
OF THE INFAMOUS
SKI-MASK FUGITIVE.
THIS MAN IS DESPERATE.
CONSIDER HIM DANGEROUS.
THE SKI-MASK FUGITIVE
IS EXPECTED TO BREAK INTO
UNSUSPECTING HOMES,
SEEKING SHELTER FROM
THE BLIZZARD AND THE POLICE.
- HE IS DESPERATE,
HE IS DANGEROUS.
OH, HO. JUST WAIT UNTIL I--WHAT?
THAT'S THE GUY ON TV.
TRYING TO BREAK IN, HUH?
WELL, IF I CAN'T GET IN,
THEN HE CAN'T GET IN!
SO YOU CALL THAT A DISGUISE,
HUH?
I'LL GIVE YOU A DISGUISE.
[THUD]
- AH!
- HUH?
- HUH?
- HEATHCLIFF!
GRANDPA!
- CAT FOOD.
ALL THAT FOR CAT FOOD.
- POOR DEAR. HEATHCLIFF
DIDN'T KNOW IT WAS YOU.
- CLOSE THAT FRONT DOOR,
GRANDMA, I'M COLD!
AND LOCK IT, TOO!
I HEARD THE POLICE ARE
CHASING A FUGITIVE.
- LET ME IN, LADY!
THE COPS ARE AFTER ME!
HURRY, LADY, OUT OF MY WAY!
- OH! DEAR ME!
- OW! MY LEG!
WHAT? MY FOOT!
YEOW!
- IT'S HIM ALL RIGHT!
YOU'RE UNDER ARREST.
- YES, PLEASE!
TAKE ME! GET ME OUT OF HERE!
- WELL, I GUESS
OUR HEATHCLIFF
IS A PRETTY GOOD CA
TO HAVE AROUND AFTER ALL.
- YOU'RE AWFULLY GOOD TO BRAVE
THIS STORM AND GO BUY CAT FOOD.
- MMM.
[SLURPING]
- WELL, HE GOT WHAT HE WANTED.
GUESS WE WON'T HAVE TO WORRY
ABOUT HIM FOR A WHILE.
- WANT TO BET?"
HA HA!
- AAH!
- AAH!
- MMM. MMM.
ARGH!
AH!
- [LAUGHTER]
- WELL, AS YOU CAN TELL
BY THE CROWD'S REACTION,
THE SHEIK'S PLANE
HAS JUST TOUCHED DOWN.
THESE PEOPLE ARE REALLY EXCITED
TO GET THEIR FIRST LOOK
A SUREALIAN ROYALTY.
OH, I THINK THE PLANE DOOR
IS ABOUT TO OPEN.
AND HERE COMES
SHEIK ALI BAMBOOBALA NOW,
FOLLOWED BY SEVERAL
OF HIS BEAUTIFUL WIVES.
THE CROWD REALLY LOVES HIM.
- BOOBALA! BOOBALA!
- THE SHEIK AS ALWAYS IS
FOLLOWED BY HIS CAT ORBA,
ANOTHER REAL CROWD PLEASER.
- WHAT A HUNK.
- YOU GOT TO BE KIDDING.
- YOUR PROBLEM IS THA
YOU DON'T KNOW A ROMANTIC
PERSON WHEN YOU SEE THEM.
- HEY, I LOOK IN THE MIRROR
EVERY DAY.
- [LAUGHTER]
- COME ON, CLEO,
LET'S GET OUT OF HERE.
- ISN'T HE WONDERFUL?
- HEY, I SAID WE'RE GOING.
THAT MEANS WITH OR WITHOUT YOU.
- RAIN? NO, I DON'T THINK SO.
- HEY, GIVE ME A CALL
WHEN YOU GET BACK TO EARTH.
- BOOBALA! BOOBALA!
BOOBALA!
BOOBALA! BOOBALA!
BOOBALA! BOOBALA!
[CHANTING CONTINUES]
- [SNIFFS]
I WANT YOU TO GET THAT GIRL
FOR ME.
- AHH
- DO YOU BELIEVE THIS?
SHE HASN'T SAID A WORD
IN 3 HOURS.
- YEAH, MAYBE SHE'S SICK.
- YEAH, WOUNDED IS MORE LIKE I
BY ONE OF CUPID'S LITTLE ARROWS.
- GRR! CLEO'S MY GIRL, RIGHT?
- I--I JUST MEANT THAT, UH--
- I KNOW WHAT YOU MEANT,
AND YOU'RE WRONG.
[CAR APPROACHES]
- THE PERSON WHO
DECORATED THIS PLACE
SHOULD BE BURIED UP TO HIS NOSE
IN AN ANTHILL.
- LISTEN,
YOU WALKING PILLOWCASE,
DON'T COME AROUND HERE
AND INSULT ME AND MY FRIENDS.
- RIFF RAFF, YOU CAN'
TALK TO ORBA LIKE THAT.
- DO NOT BE DISMAYED, MY DEAR.
HE, LIKE HIS SURROUNDINGS,
LACKS CLASS.
BESIDES, IT IS NOT THIS RUFFIAN
I HAVE COME TO SEE.
- LET ME AT HIM.
- IT IS YOU, MY DESERT FLOWER.
- THAT'S IT, PAL.
YOU JUST WEN
ONE STEP TOO FAR.
GET HIM, BOYS!
- YOU ARE MAKING BIG MISTAKE.
NOW, IF YOU'LL EXCUSE US,
MY DEAR.
- WHOA! WHOA! WHOA! WHOA!
- 2, 3!
[THUD]
- OHH
WELL, HAVE THEY HAD ENOUGH YET?
- APOLOGIZE FOR THE DISPLAY
OF VIOLENCE,
BUT UNFORTUNATELY
IT WAS NECESSARY.
- YOU DON'T HAVE TO APOLOGIZE.
AND IF YOU DON'T MIND,
I THINK I'D LIKE TO GO NOW.
- MY CAR AWAITS.
- DON'T THINK YOU'RE GONNA
GET AWAY WITH THIS.
- YEAH, I THINK THEY JUST DID.
- THIS IS INCREDIBLE.
- AH, YOU LIKE ECONOMY CARS?
- AH, THIS IS SUCH
A WONDERFUL DAY.
I WISH IT WOULD NEVER END.
- HEH. PRECISELY
WHAT I HAD IN MIND.
THE SHEIK'S PLANE IS FUELED
AND READY TO GO.
WE ARE RETURNING TO OUR COUNTRY
TONIGHT.
YOU WILL GO WITH US.
- OH, THAT'S
A REALLY NICE INVITATION,
BUT I COULDN'T LEAVE RIFF RAFF.
I JUST WANTED TO TEACH HIM
A LESSON.
- IT WASN'T AN INVITATION,
BUT AN ORDER.
YOU WILL GO WITH US.
- LOOK, NOBODY TELLS ME WHAT--
- SEIZE HER.
- HEY, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
RIFF RAFF WAS RIGHT ABOUT YOU.
YOU'RE NOTHING BUT A BIG PHONY,
AND YOU'LL NEVER
GET AWAY WITH THIS.
- DON'T BE SO SURE ABOUT THAT.
I ALWAYS GET WHAT I WANT.
TO THE AIRPORT!
HA HA!
- AND IF SHE THINKS SHE'S GONNA
COME RUNNING BACK TO ME--
- IT SEEMS REAL CLEAR THIS
IS SOMETHING YOU SHOULD HEAR.
- THE TOP STORY OF THE HOUR,
IN A SURPRISING MOVE,
SHEIK ALI BAMBOOBALA
ANNOUNCED HE AND HIS ENTOURAGE
WILL BE FLYING HOME TONIGHT.
- SO? WHAT DOES THA
HAVE TO DO WITH ME?
- HOW CAN YOU SI
WHEN CLEO MIGHT SPLIT?
- I DON'T CARE. AS A MATTER OF
FACT I DON'T CARE SO MUCH,
WE'RE JUST GONNA TAKE A RUN
DOWN TO THAT AIRPOR
TO SHOW HER HOW MUCH
I DON'T CARE.
- LET GO OF ME!
- HEY, BOSS, I DON'T THINK SHE
WANTS TO GO.
- NO KIDDING.
- WHAT DO WE DO?
THE PLAN'S UP TO YOU.
- JUST FOLLOW MY LEAD, GOT IT?
MADE IT.
- EH!
- UH, NOW WHAT DO WE DO, BOSS?
- WE GOT TO GET TO CLEO
AND QUICK.
AND I THINK I KNOW
JUST HOW WE'LL DO IT.
- AS SOON AS WE GET BACK
TO MY COUNTRY,
YOU WILL BE GIVEN THE DISTINC
HONOR OF BECOMING MY 21st WIFE.
- NO WAY, JOSE.
- YOU WILL CHANGE YOUR MIND.
I WILL SEE TO THAT.
- DON'T HOLD YOUR BREATH.
- WELL, IT'S ABOUT TIME.
NOW STRAIGHTEN UP THIS ROOM
AND BE QUICK ABOUT IT.
[COUGHING]
STOP THAT, YOU FOOLS,
AND PUT THOSE BROOMS
DOWN IMMEDIATELY.
YEOUCH!
I'LL SEE THAT YOU
ARE PUNISHED FOR THIS.
- MAYBE SOME JUICE
WOULD COOL YOU OFF, SIRE.
- YES! GIVE IT TO ME!
- WITH PLEASURE.
- RIFF RAFF! IT'S YOU!
- YOU WERE EXPECTING MAYBE
LAWRENCE OF ARABIA?
NOW, LET'S GET OUT OF HERE.
- I'LL HAVE YOUR HEADS FOR THIS.
GUARDS! GUARDS!
THERE ARE INTRUDERS
ON THIS PLANE!
FIND THEM AT ONCE
AND BRING THEM TO ME.
[THUD]
CHECK EVERYTHING. THEY COULDN'
HAVE GOTTEN TOO FAR.
- OUCH.
UH, HIYA. OH, BOSS.
- GET 'EM, BOYS.
- WITH A 1, 2, 3,
JUST SEND THEM TO ME.
- SEIZE THEM.
- YEOW!
- ROUND AND ROUND THEY GO.
WHERE THEY STOP
I'LL BET I KNOW.
- HA HA!
- NOW I'VE GOT YOU!
- I'M SHAKING IN MY SHEETS.
- OH, RIFF RAFF,
YOU WERE WONDERFUL.
- UH, THAT'S ALL GREAT,
BUT WE STILL GOT ONE PROBLEM:
HOW DO WE GET OFF THIS PLANE?
- JUST FOLLOW ME.
- I'M NOT GOING WITHOUT YOU.
- DON'T WORRY. I'M SURE THE BOYS
WILL FIND SOME MORE CHUTES.
- YEP. TWO MORE,
AND THAT'S IT.
- I KNOW THEY'RE IN THERE!
- WELL, IT'S TIME FOR YOU TO GO.
- STOP THEM!
- OOF!
- OH!
- UH, THIS IS GROUND CONTROL
TO SHEIK BAMBOOBOLA'S PLANE.
YOU HAVE AN OPEN CARGO DOOR.
PLEASE RETURN TO THE AIRPOR
AT ONCE. THANK YOU.
- ROGER, GROUND CONTROL.
WE'LL CHANGE COURSE
AND RETURN IMMEDIATELY.
- I GUESS YOUR LITTLE GAME
IS UP.
- I'M SCARED OUT OF MY BOOTS
'CAUSE THERE AIN'
NO MORE CHUTES.
- WHOA!
- HECTOR! WORDSWORTH! MUNGO!
WHERE ARE YOU GUYS?
- UH, WE'RE UP HERE, BOSS.
EVERYTHING'S FINE.
- UH, THAT'S A MATTER
OF OPINION.
- THAT WILL BE ALL FOR NOW.
WELL, NOW, ISN'T THIS AS GOOD
AS ANYTHING THAT CREEP ORBA
COULD GIVE YOU?
- NO.
- WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT ?
- BEING WITH YOU MAKES I
A WHOLE LOT BETTER.
- HA HA!
- HA HA!
- BELIEVE IT OR NOT,
YOU CAN TEACH YOUR CA
TO COME WHEN YOU WANT.
I'M GONNA SHOW YOU HOW.
YOUR BASIC CAT.
YOUR BASIC TREAT.
PUT YOUR CAT AT THE OTHER END
OF THE ROOM,
POINT AT THE CAT, THEN A
A PLACE IN FRONT OF YOUR FEE
AND SAY IN A LOUD, CLEAR VOICE,
"COME! COME! COME!"
GOOD, MUNGO.
NOW WE'LL DO IT AGAIN AND AGAIN
UNTIL YOU GET IT RIGHT.
COME! GOOD BOY, MUNGO.
YOU'RE LEARNING FASTER
THAN LASSIE.
HEATHCLIFF, HEATHCLIFF
NO ONE SHOULD ♪
TERRIFY THEIR
NEIGHBORHOOD ♪
BUT HEATHCLIFF
JUST WON'T BE UNDONE ♪
PLAYING PRANKS
ON EVERYONE ♪
THE GAME
WILL REIGN SUPREME ♪
AND NO ONE
CAN DENY-Y-Y-Y ♪
THEY'LL MAKE SOME HISTORY
AND ALWAYS HAVE
AN ALIBI-I-I ♪
SO JOIN IN THE JUBILEE
THE CATS ARE GREA
THEY'LL ALL AGREE ♪
OH O-OH O-O-OH O-OH
BUT HEATHCLIFF
JUST WON'T BE UNDONE ♪
YOU SHOULD REALIZE
HE CAN WIN IT WITH YOU