Inspector Gadget (2015) s02e10 Episode Script

Tool Russia With Love - Low Speed

1 Inspector - Gadget! Inspector Gadget! Inspector - Gadget! Inspector Gadget! Go Go Gadget, Go! Go Go Gadget, Go! Inspector - Gadget! Inspector Gadget! Go Go Gadget, Go! Inspector Gadget! Ahhhhh! YOUR FAILURE IS UNACCEPTABLE!!! NOT my fault.
Gadget was all like Go Go Gadget thingys! Then Penny was like, "Aaaagh! You're so handsome!" And I was like, "Aaaagh! I know!" I FORBID EXCUSES! Your failure is bad enough, but now Baron Von Steeletoe has called my henchmen FUNKY on MySpyPlace! And not good funky, but BAD FUNKY! Yeah, they totally smell.
And no wonder, they've been using the same uniforms since you created MAD! They just need a good steam cleaning! And YOU will be cleaning them!!! What?! And I have the largest steam cleaner in the world to do it! All you need to do is add water! So, you're going to make me go get a ludicrous amount of water to dump into a volcano, just so you can clean your henchmen's uniforms because you're too cheap to buy new ones? That's about right.
Is is just me or do the MAD Henchmen smell REALLY funky lately? My smell receptors are set to burnt toast at all times, so I haven't noticed! Gadget! A job well done! I have a new mission for you.
That's perfect, Chief! MAD plans to steal 100 mega-litres of water from SIBERIA and drop it into a volcano which could create enough steam to cloud the atmosphere and trigger an ice age! We're on it, Chief! Also, because you will be working through HQ's Russian office, you will be teaming up with their top agent, Comrade Multi Use Tool.
This message will self-destruct.
We're still on it, Chief! I wonder how MAD is going to move 100 mega-litres of water? BUT IT'S SO COLD! Of course it's cold! It's a giant ice cube! NOW GET MOVING!! Great.
Gadget.
Can't a guy slide a giant ice cube through Russia without being hassled by a goody goody cyborg?! You're getting pretty sneaky Penny.
Pretty? Yes! Penny? No! But I have heard of her.
She kicks your butt a lot, yes? I don't know if you're clones or evil twins, but this is just weird! Wowsers! Ugh.
Weird and dangerous.
I'm outta here! Hello world famous HQ agent Inspector Gadget and daughter of sibling to Gadget! You must be Comrade Multi Use Tool.
And I am his niece, Pasha.
Hey! I'm Penny.
Wowzers! If you don't mind me saying, Comrade, you are a very striking man! I am not minding at all! Uncle, it seems handsome annoying boy has escaped.
Talon does that all the time! Drives me crazy! My comrade, Comrade, and I will start an aerial search.
GO GO MULTI USE TOOL WITH SPINNING BLADES OF A HELICOPTER FOR FLYING! Go Go Gadget Copter! Whoa! You destroy cube? Ah, I see! If cube is gone, MAD agent must get another! Where we will stop him! Brilliant! There is much I can learn from most famous HQ agent! And I can't wait to teach you! Ack! I see your flying car can no longer fly, you ride with me, yes? Oooh, yes, yes I will.
Brain, you stay here and fix the Gadget-mobile, and we'll track down Talon.
"Run a hose from the ocean" I said.
"Maybe raid a bottled water warehouse" I said, but noooooo, he just has to have a giant ice cube to steam those uniforms! So, who is handsome young MAD agent? Handsome? Maybe, but he's soooo annoying! Always escaping, totally lame plans, the witless banter, that smarmy smile, his perfect hair, and that totally charming laugh Pfft, so annoying.
Yes it is very clear you do not like him at all.
I am not seeing young MAD agent who is being escaping, you? Let me see.
GO GO GADGE BINOCULARS! I'll yell out for him to surrender! GO GO GADGET MEGAPHONE! I see now what you do.
You keep MAD agents guessing with doing weird things.
You are magnificent! No, no.
I am, In-spec-tor Gad-get.
I am thinking that is your transportation vehicle, yes? That MAD agent is stealing my Gadget-mobile! Ah, I believe he's indicating that he has no intention of surrendering, and also he would like an order of fries.
No problem! I will stop him now! WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU'RE ON YOUR SECOND CUBE?! Well, first Gadget showed up, and then a second Gadget showed up, then they broke my first one.
Two Gadgets? Now you're just making stuff up! Okay, all I need now is a little luck and I can get this cube to the volcano without any more interrupt tions.
Hey ladies! You wouldn't want to give a guy a break would you? Maybe help push? Oh, I'll give you a push, all the way to an HQ holding cell! How about Pasha? Very pretty name by the way.
Like she's going to fall for your bogus flattery routine.
It's not bogus if it's true.
Um, yeah it still is.
Um, no it still isn't.
Ah, now I see why this Talon has never been caught.
You two are liking each other.
We are not! We are not! Sure.
Now that I think about it, she's right.
I think you do like me.
WHAT?!! Brain! You got the Gadget-mobile going! That's great! They're chasing you? Perfect, lead them to my signal.
We've found Talon.
Your accent is so cool.
I've always wanted to learn Russian.
Hey, maybe you can teach me! And get here fast or there won't be anything left of him to capture.
This MAD agent is very good.
But no matter, soon he will be destroyed.
In my HQ, we like to capture our bad guys.
Observe.
GO GO GADGET EXTENDO-ARMS! In my HQ, we like to capture our bad guys.
Observe.
Go Go Gadget Extendo-Arms.
In my HQ, we like to capture our bad guys.
Observe.
Go Go Gadget Extendo-Arms WOWZERS! GO GO MULTI USE TOOL ARMS THAT ARE FOR EXTENDING OUTWARD AND GRABBING! MORE THAN ONE OF THIS WOWZER! Don't worry Pasha, I've got this.
Awww, look at that! A book! It's so cute! I love that you go old school.
The Falcon Mark Four Communicator Book! Wow, I used one of those for years! I know, totally agree, so lame.
But I didn't say Lame? Well, it is no fancy pair of dainty gloves for drinking tea and milking cows like yours, but it does job fine.
Dainty? Can dainty gloves do this? Woahhh! Girls, girls.
You're both amazing in a one is clearly WAY more amazing than the other sort of way.
Hmph Whoa! Brain! Why didn't you try to stop the MAD agent from stealing my Gadget-mobile? Bad dog! In Russia, we know how to be treating dogs making mistakes.
GO GO MULTI USE TOOL GLOVE FOR SPRINGING OUT AND BOXING AND FOR POSITIVE REINFORCEMENT! You guard transportation vehicle next time, yes? IS GOOD DOG! Look, you're new to fighting Talon, so I'll cut you some slack.
Always with the talky talky.
You should spend more time with the capture capture! Well, Uncle Claw is going to lose it when I don't bring him his ice cube, but this is kinda fun.
Hm, let's give this positive reinforcement thing a try.
Go Go Gadget Petting Mitt.
Whoa! Um, I thought you guys were arguing.
Pfft, pitting us against each other? Like we'd fall for your lame manipulation trick.
We pretend to argue then hack into your shoes using computers! You are not smart, very handsome MAD agent.
She said I'm handsome.
Stop that.
Stop that.
Gadget technique is fun, yes? Who knows what happen next?! GO GO MULTI USE TOOL ARMS THAT ARE FOR EXTENDING OUTWARD AND HUGGING! Gadget, Comrade, good work on the mission! Aaaand it looks like Talon just laser tunneled himself away.
This is being very annoying.
I know, right?! You know I said I'd pay for new uniforms myself!! Uncle Claw? OH, COME ON?!! I'll get you next time Gadget! And Comrade Multi Use Tool! NEXT TIME!! Really not liking this.
Less talking, more pedalling.
Stop and you'll be frozen in MADtanium! Part of my new line of MADsport Doomsday Devices! Able to freeze all your arch enemy's vehicles with very little post cleanup! You know you could have told me all this rather than having me ride a tricycle.
Also, why a tricycle? I enjoy humiliating you.
Whaa! Excellent! Soon the MADsport will be ready for use on all my Arch Enemies! First, there's a couple more tests I wanna run.
MADcat? I look forward to the HQ retreat every year.
It's the only time I can go outside without fear of being blown up! AND I love the meat balls! Welcome to the Inspector Gadget HQ Retreat Tour Company Travel Operator, Incorporated Limited Partnership.
Hop aboard! Hmmm Uncle Gadget, I ran hundreds of scenarios and found that this was by far the quickest way to go! Quickest! No thanks! Getting there is 75% of five eighths of the fun! We'll arrive in time, but also in style! Go Go Gadget Route Reminder! This is a route! It has twists, turns, and twisty turns! Now strap in! This bridge was built in prehistoric times by a T-Rex.
Its tiny hands really helped with the masonry work! I really don't know where he gets his information.
Can we please hurry, Gadget? I'm famished! I can hear the meatballs calling my name! Uncle Gadget? Maybe it would be a good idea if we possibly, um headed towards the retreat a bit faster? You know how I hate cold meatballs.
Everyone loves warm meatballs.
But, you know what everyone loves even more? Obscure Roadside attractions! Wind North by Northwest.
- Height 12000 feet.
- You still here? You can't just jump out of a super sonic Jet.
You have to take all the variables into Now what's for dinner tonight? Woah woah woah!! Perfect landing Coming up! The key to enjoying any road trip is proper hydration followed by frequent rest room stops! While I'm here, could really "use the facilities" C'mon, c'mon! Are you following us? Uh, are you following me? You're totally planning something.
And I'm gonna figure it out.
No Can't a guy just go to the bathroom.
At a rest stop.
In the middle of nowhere? Here's your key, Bathroom Attendant.
Now, back to the Road! Gotta go.
Have a great trip I'm sure your memory of it will be frozen in time! Whoa! I wonder what Talon is up to Maybe he did just have to go.
Evil people have bladders too.
I don't buy it.
He was up to something.
I'm gonna look around.
Ha! I knew it! See? He totally did something evil! And I found it!!! Right that's bad sorry Yep.
Brain, Talon has planted something on the side of the bus.
We need you to go out there and find out what he's done.
Nothing like a quiet drive through a garbage dump! Am I right? Ahhh! Uncle Gadget! You need to keep the bus on the road! It looks like it has triggered some kind of force field on the bus! We're trapped inside! Very fancy design! You can admire it later, Professor.
Once we shut down whatever it is.
Always after we shut things down.
Where's the fun in that? If you're hearing this, then you're probably sealed inside the bus.
And obviously, you've found the MADsport.
A state of the art mobile doomsday device set to freeze you and the entire bus in MADtanium.
Oooh.
Sounds unstable.
It's very unstable.
It will go off if you stop the bus, try to remove it, take your hands off the wheel, try to escape, use one of your portal thingies, or if you go go gadget the bus into something else.
So, pretty much if we do anything.
So, pretty much if you do anything.
This message will self-destruct when the bus does! Talon out! That went well.
Right? You were pitchy.
Pitchy? What do you - wait, I think it's still recording forget all that.
Ah, it doesn't matter.
You'll be frozen soon anyway.
I knew I should have taken that ride with the lunch lady.
Huh? Is that a MAD agent? I'll take care of him! No, Uncle Gadget! That's um Gary from accounting! He wanted to enjoy your scenic tour from the outside of the bus.
Gadget! Why don't you giv, um "Gary" the bus ride of his life! Excellent idea, Chief! Hang on, Gary! This bus ride is about to get even more scenic-y-er.
Next on the Gadget scenic tour is the world's greatest parking spot! There it is.
The world's greatest parking spot isn't it beautiful? I think it's better to admire the spot, while driving away from it I beg to differ, Chief.
If we can hack into one of these other cars, maybe we can park it in the spot before we freeze! Huh, I guess you can't expect a spot like that to stay empty forever.
Good thing there's the world's second greatest parking spot! Oops! People are really eager to park today.
Did anyone hear a crunch? This is not as relaxing as the retreat invitation promised.
Hmm.
.
That might leave a mark.
Ah, nothing like seeing the world's greatest parking spots put to good use.
Let's get back on the tour! To the world's biggest speed bumps! What is it? I'm very busy! Uncle Claw, I really gotta go.
But the MADsport's in place and has just been activated.
Talon! I want this done by dinner.
Chicken Fingers tonight! Ooh, with plum sauce? Those speed bumps were even bigger than I imagined! Hands on the wheel! I've never seen anything this complex before.
You must be careful.
Very, very careful.
Every little movement has to be measured.
If they aren't going to stop themselves, I'll have to help them.
Hm.
That's a weird place to put a hole.
Go Go Gadget Emergency Brake! No, Uncle Gadget! Huh? This road is in terrible condition.
Uncle Gadget, eyes on the road.
Eyes on the road!! No need to yell, Penny.
It's very distracting to a driver.
Whoa! I know everyone is disappointed we had to cancel our trip to the world's fourth largest hay stack, but we are running low on gas.
Wowsers, really low.
And getting lower! And lower! And lower! What if we got a crane that lifted the top of the bus off, and we held on, swinging to safety before we all get MADtaniumed? It would take way too long.
What if we cut a hole in the side of the bus where the MADsport is, and fling it into the distance? My readings indicate Man, that thing is thorough.
It might actually work.
So Un-MAD like.
If we all become MADtanium-cicles, I just want you to know I may have left a highly unstable black hole back at HQ We've all done things like that Maybe not exactly, but close.
Since we'll soon be frozen forever, you should all know, I've always wanted to dance ballet.
I don't remember filling up with disappearing fuel.
Something is suspicious.
- Ahh - Ahhh! Hm.
Go Go Gadget X Ray Vision.
Hang on, Gary.
Professor, we might have a rust problem.
Better get it back to HQ.
Go Go Gadget G-Portal.
This is the work of MAD.
They were uncharacteristically inactive today, so they must have been here eating our meatballs! Or maybe it was Gary from accounting! I wonder where the Gadget-Bus ended up? Ahh, that's better.
Talon! What's the status of Gadget and the MADSport? They should be freezing up anytime.
Adequate Hurry back to the lair.
And pick up plum sauce on the way.
Okay, but I might be a little late.
I'm out of Rocket Juice.
Oh hey, here comes a bus! Next time, Gadget.
NEXT TI Finally getting into the spirit so, where's that plum sauce?