Kaguya-sama: Love Is War (2019) s01e04 Episode Script

Kaguya Wants Affection/The Student Council Wants It to Be Said/Kaguya Wants Him to Send It/Miyuki Shirogane Wants to Talk

1 Meow.
Is that right? See? That's cute! Yes.
Cat ears are your time, Fujiwara, as to Shinomiya is me.
I know, right? In other words, the time you brought was originally Shinomiya and cat ears alone.
You're scaring me! Cat ears and girls! Mutualism! There are relationships in this world that are naturally symbiotic.
Clovers and honeybees! Crocodiles and hummingbirds! Avocados and soy sauce! And cats Cats, which a great majority of humans love.
And here we have Kaguya Shinomiya, a graceful girl.
How will the compatibility of those two things be reflected in him? Cute! MIRACULOUS COMPATIBILITY (MARRIAGE) A marriage! KAGUYA WANTS AFFECTION Is it really necessary to cosplay for the welcome party? FRENCH EXCHANGE STUDEN WELCOME SCHEDULE Yes! France is the biggest cosplaying nation right after Japan.
With cosplaying, you don't need words.
There's no better way to overcome the language barrier and deepen our friendship! But still What do you think, President? Cute! MIRACULOUS COMPATIBILITY (MARRIAGE) A marriage! Well Cute! Not bad, I guess.
No good! Whenever I look at Shinomiya, my face tenses up! I need to calm down and look normal! That's a scary look! Not much of a reaction.
It looks like this kind of thing doesn't suit me.
It'd probably look better on someone with more charm, like Miss Fujiwara.
Wh-What is it? What's what? You wear a pair, too, President.
Meow.
MEOW How can I put it? Um Pointless.
You don't hold back, do you? You knew beforehand that this wouldn't look good on me.
True! Cuuute! MIRACULOUS COMPATIBILITY (MARRIAGE) A marriage! What? The president just has cat ears on! The reaction of others aside, it was a perfect combo in Kaguya's mind! What should I do? I can't get my mouth to stop smiling! It'll be obvious to him that I think he looks cute! What's wrong, Shinomiya? Since it's come to this Oh, it's nothing.
Skill Biting one's tongue! But that's not a perfect method.
GRIN GRIN A half-grin remained on her face.
SHIVER SHIVER What's the smirk for, Shinomiya? Is there something you'd like to say about my cat ears? No, not at all.
GRIN GRIN They look very good on you.
That expression! As if looking at a bug! Does it mean I look so terrible that I barely qualify as human? Miss Fujiwara, let's take a photo of the president.
Good idea! We have to preserve this moment for future generations.
She means for extortion! She'll put it away and use it as a bargaining chip someday! Forget about it! Don't be like that.
Kaguya, you, too.
Me, too? Shinomiya, too? If she takes my photo, she'll have me by the short hairs.
But at the same time, I'll legally be able to obtain a cute photo of her like this! A balanced scale! BALANCED SCALE The weight of the merit and demerit are the same! If you're going to take it, do it now, Fujiwara! Shirogane chooses the cute side.
A side he would normally never choose! O-Oh.
Take it with the 4K thing! R-Right! Damn it! She's even cuter when I'm standing right next to her! The muscles in my face are stiffening! I can't believe that looks so good on him.
No! My mouth is smiling by itself again! C-Could both of you give me a cheerful smile? - I can't! - I can't! I want to get closer to his cuteness! I have to burn this image into my memory from a shorter distance! Why are you glaring at each other? If you're going to fight, I'm going to confiscate these! NAB What was I doing? I feel like I was possessed.
Scary! CAT EARS ARE SCARY - Cat ears are scary! - Cat ears are scary! RESULTS OF TODAY'S MATCH: FUJIWARA LOSES Results of today's match Fujiwara loses.
HENCEFORTH, ALL MEMBERS OF STUDENT COUNCIL ARE BANNED FROM WEARING CAT EARS Um, the welcome party is next Monday.
Other than making decorations, we need to go shopping for souvenir sweets.
THE STUDENT COUNCIL WANTS IT TO BE SAID We probably need two people for that.
We'll need a few other things, too, and enough for all of the participants, so that's a lot of stuff.
Which means giving up our day off to go shopping.
What a pain.
Boy, what a pain.
Who'd wanna do that? You know, Shinomiya? Well, true.
We'll be in trouble if no one wants to do it.
Well, if it's really necessary, I could do it.
FIDGET FIDGE Oh! Why don't we play a game, and the losers have to go? - A game? - A game? Yes! The banned word game! THE BANNED WORD GAME The banned word game.
Yes! Here's an example! I write a word like this and pass it to the person on my right.
Hold it up and don't look at it.
SIMPLE That's the word that person can't say.
I get it.
So you don't know what your own banned word is.
Simple.
You're out! Okay, let's do it for real! I pass it to the person on my right.
In that case I should write a word that Fujiwara would be likely to say.
But the second and third place people will go shopping.
FIRST PLACE DOESN'T GO SECOND AND THIRD PLACE GO Well, a man is needed for the physical labor, STRONGER (THAN WOMEN) while no one knows more about traditional sweets than Shinomiya.
CERTIFIED TEA EXPER KNOWLEDGEABLE It's just a matter of efficiency.
Therefore, I need to let Fujiwara win while I beat Shinomiya.
FIRST PLACE: FUJIWARA SECOND PLACE: ME THIRD PLACE: SHINOMIYA CHECK-IT-OU I'm sure Fujiwara would never say this! I'll win for sure! CHECK-IT-OU All right, are we ready? Yo, yo, let's get started, yo! Fujiwara? When I play da banned word game, people always be choosin' words n' phrases I be sayin', but not now, yo! I be changin' da way I speak, so my words be different, yo! Too bad, man! No! Don't look at her! I don't want her to lose! Yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo! Crap, she'll end up saying, "check-it-out.
" Kaguya, what ya think your word is, yo? Say "Hooo!" Say "Hooo!" Say "Hooo" That's childish! There's a surefire way to win this game.
That's by not talking at all! Say "Yay!" Say "Yay!" Shinomiya Say "Yay!" We won't get anywhere like that.
At the bare minimum, speak enough to make it a conversation.
If you insist.
Fine.
Inevitable behavior.
INEVITABLE BEHAVIOR "That person would do this.
" "This person would say this.
" This game produces a situation that draws the designated word out of your opponent.
But how am I going to get her to say that banned word? LOVE My instinct is telling me, "You've spent half a year trying to get her to say that! It's impossible!" LOVE But wait! I can steer the conversation towards something that Shinomiya loves doing.
Fujiwara, is there something you hate? Shirogane passed the word "hate" on to Fujiwara, a word that can easily be connected to "love.
" What I hate? Let's see.
People often tell me I'm not good at reading a situation, yo.
But they also say that's a good thing, yo.
But when they talk about love and stuff, they don't include me! They say I'd be sure to step on a land mine! That's sound judgment.
When I think about making problems for people without even realizing it, it makes me sad.
That's what I hate.
Miss Fujiwara I've never thought you've caused problems for me.
In fact, there are many people who've been helped by your straightforwardness.
Kaguya Really? You don't hate me? Well, I mean I love you.
You're out, yo! LOVE Inevitable behavior! When all is said and done, it was inevitable that caring Kaguya would try to comfort a depressed Fujiwara! Fujiwara read that.
That was nasty! Was all that a lie? It wasn't a lie, but a bluff, yo! Of course people would include me in conversations about love interests, yo! Since we've gotten this far, the rest should be easy.
I'll lose automatically by letting my guard down and following her lead.
She's got everything she needs to win.
But Hey, when it rains, it pours, yo! was that the truth? She said it was a bluff, but a bluff has power because it's a pinch of a lie mixed with truth.
It must be nice, having no troubles.
If that's the case, how much of it was a lie? When Fujiwara was speaking about feeling alienated, were those words and her eyes all lies? If it's possible that they weren't then, I'm playing this game wrong.
I can't stand the idea of hurting others for the sake of my own self-interest.
That's my credo, and this situation relates to it.
Prioritizing my own circumstances and purposely losing That would be self-interest and truly alienate her! The idea of going out shopping with Shinomiya may be appealing, but I can't betray my own conviction! Fujiwara I'm going to get serious here! You're out, yo! Yes! I beat the president, too! Yay! Yay! Inevitable behavior.
An action a person would necessarily take given certain circumstances.
SERIOUS And predicting that is the essential point of the game.
Shopping, huh? Well, we lost, so I guess we can't complain.
The banned word game is a game that demands understanding of your opponents.
Ah, dammit.
I lost.
We're going to buy the souvenirs.
RESULTS OF TODAY'S MATCH: UTTER DEFEAT FOR SHIROGANE Results of today's match Utter defeat for Shirogane.
All right! I'm looking forward to seeing what you get, yo! THE HEART THROBBING SHOPPING ARC CONTINUES CHECK-IT-OU "Check-it-out"? The president said we'd talk about shopping after he got back.
Oh.
The day he bought a smartphone, we exchanged e-mail addresses and phone numbers.
But I've been waiting and waiting, and he still hasn't contacted me! He has no intention of sending me a message first! "President, I'm looking forward to tomorrow—" What are you doing? Well, I thought I'd send a text on your behalf.
Don't! I'm not sending the first text! KAGUYA WANTS HIM TO SEND I All this beating around the bush Lady Kaguya, you're in love with President Shirogane, aren't you? I have feelings for the president.
Then But I'm only interested because he's got the elements I lack.
It's definitely not love.
Then, what if the secretary started dating President Shirogane? Well? You've got it wrong! I wouldn't want the president to take Miss Fujiwara away from me! Despite appearances, she's my dear friend.
From: Fujiwara Subject: Octopus Look! A live octopus!! She's your dear friend, right? If it weighs on your mind that much, Lady Kaguya instead of a text, why not call? C-Call? He's expecting a text.
Exploit that carelessness, and attack this way! Carelessness? Attack? It's the perfect plan.
Before Lady Kaguya quibbles about it, click-click there.
Here you go.
Wait! I'm not mentally prepared! SHIROGANE RINGING Hello? This is Shinomiya.
President, is that you? I'm Miyuki's father.
U-Um, is the president I mean, is Shirogane there? I am Shirogane.
No, I mean i-is Miyuki there? Oh, my son? Miyuki! A girl's on the phone for you! A girl's calling for him? Wha You don't answer another person's cell phone, Dad! It's me.
It's Shinomiya.
Oh, Shinomiya? I was calling about the plan for tomorrow.
Is now okay? Sure.
I'm in the tub, but that's fine.
The tub? Then he's naked, huh? Lady Kaguya, right now you're talking to someone who's completely exposed.
It's muffled on your end.
I-I'll call you back! No problem.
My phone is waterproof.
There is a problem.
How about we meet tomorrow at 11 am in front of Hachiko? Okay.
We'll buy the sweets, then go to Hands.
I guess that's about it.
Right.
STRETCH OUT THE CONVERSATION MORE Well, I'll see you tomorrow.
Yes.
Shinomiya— What? What were you about to say? I'm going to sleep.
FROM: SHIROGANE I WAS TRYING TO TELL YOU SOMETHING AS YOU HUNG UP THE PHONE LOOKS LIKE TONIGHT WILL GET PRETTY COLD, SO BE WARM AND GO TO SLEEP GOOD NIGH Good for you.
Your first text.
Results of today's match Kaguya wins.
RESULTS OF TODAY'S MATCH: KAGUYA WINS THE NEXT DAY It seems Shibuya Station is flooded.
I'm going.
The president is waiting for me.
I have to go! There's no way he's there.
A text canceling our plans But it's the first text Shinomiya has sent me, right? So I'll call that a win for today.
Thankfully, my phone is waterproof.
THE END OF THE HEART THROBBING SHOPPING ARC TOOK 30 MINUTES TO SEND THE CANCELLATION TEXT.
FRENCH FOREIGN EXCHANGE STUDENTS WELCOME PARTY We got it ready in time! Good work, everyone! Headmaster, next time, please don't tell us so last-minute.
MIYUKI SHIROGANE WANTS TO TALK Understood! Well, everyone, have a good time! Can you speak French, Shinomiya? No.
Not very well.
How about you, President? I AM MIYUKI SHIROGANE You're not the president for nothing.
I just prepared by studying the handbook.
U-Um Liar! You can speak French? Yes! My mom is a former diplomat, so ever since I was little, she drummed various languages into my head.
Wait a second.
Am I the only person here who can't speak French? COMPLETELY ISOLATED He's completely isolated! Wh-Wh-What should I do? If they figure out I'm the only one who doesn't speak it President of student council of a Japanese school can't speak French? Maybe he's just dumb.
HOW CUTE This is bad, bad for my heart.
Shirogane why do you think I suddenly asked you to prepare a party? I must determine whether you're truly someone to whom this academy can be entrusted.
The real test begins now.
Betsy Yes.
No need to go easy on him.
Make mincemeat out of Miyuki Shirogane with everything you've got.
Are you sure? Betsy Beltoise, the vice-president of the French school's student council.
Her nickname is "The Wound-licking Razor.
" THE WOUND-LICKING RAZOR No one has ever been impervious to her verbal attack.
VERBAL ATTACK Hey.
Betsy's sarcasm is like punching someone you've just met in the face.
Next, she provokes him as if simultaneously insulting his parents and lover.
On top of that, she diminishes his character in a way that would make a man in his sixties break down in tears.
THAT'S IT! Miyuki Shirogane! He smiles confidently in the face of that merciless verbal onslaught? I'd be throwing up while bowing down on the ground! You'd think he couldn't comprehend what she was saying! My verbal assault isn't getting through! That's impossible! Betsy unleashes even stronger invective against Shirogane.
What was that? You Oh, sorry.
You don't understand Japanese, do you? Kaguya menaces Betsy with language that'd get the attention of the Broadcasting Code.
Shinomiya? P-President! Don't get the wrong idea! That was She She's going to kill me! I'm sorry.
I-It's okay.
Japanese high school girls are scary! Oh, what did I do? Exhibition match.
The Japanese school won.
EXHIBITION MATCH THE JAPANESE SCHOOL WON I bet you look down on me now.
After being so foul-mouthed This is like the old me.
Like I said at the beginning, I skimmed the French handbook.
I couldn't have caught what you said.
So, I have no idea what you were saying to her.
I just know you were mad because she was badmouthing me.
Thank you.
President! That's one thing I about you.
What? What did you say? It's a secret.
Hey, don't do that to me! It only makes me wanna know more! A secret is a secret.
What did you say? Results of today's match RESULTS OF TODAY'S MATCH: BOTH WINNERS It wasn't in French.
Both winners.
- In Latin? - No.
BECAUSE THEY SHOWED EACH OTHER THEIR WEAKNESS - In Yiddish? - No.
- In Finnish? - No.