Knokke Off (2023) s01e01 Episode Script

Welcome to Knokke, bitch!

[muffled music, people cheering]
[muffled cheering]
[nervous breaths]
[muffled cheering]
[woman, muffled] Alex!
[woman, muffled] Alex!
[nervous breaths]
[woman] Alex!
[woman] Alex!
- [woman] Hey, Alex!
- [pounding techno music]
Hey, son!
You okay?!
Alex, come on. Did you take anything?
- No, I didn't take anything.
- Why did you make me rush over here?
[breathes heavily] They know.
- [techno music]
- [crowd] Hey, hey, hey!
What do they know?
[thud in the distance]
[boy] Lex! Lex!
[suspenseful music, people shouting]
[girl breathing heavily]
[girl sighs]
[moaning] Stay.
[she laughs]
[male voice] Take your time for
a meditative walk in a secluded spot.
And in a place where there's room to walk
a few meters forwards and backwards.
[waves crashing]
When meditating while walking
focus on walking,
not on your destination.
[wind rustling]
[soft music in the background]
You need to be present,
with every step and with every breath.
Focus on firmly planting your feet.
First your left foot,
then your right foot.
[woman talking in distance]
You can try to pay attention
to your breathing.
[muffled music from headphones]
If other objects
or dangers impose upon you
[loud honking]
Sure, grandpa. What are you doing?
Are you just going to
you don't need to pay attention to it.
I'm not waiting for you, grandpa!
Try to anticipate, will you?!
- What was that?
- A much too expensive car.
[ominous music, woman talking in distance]
You simply continue running.
[girl panting loudly]
And now come to a full stop,
to complete this exercise.
[garden shears buzz]
- [Emilie] Daddy, left or right?
- [Angelique, French] Listen! No, no, no
- Is that important?
- Good morning.
- And?
- 18.5 kilometers in 1 hour and 20 minutes.
Well done.
[Angelique, French]
You don't understand. My daughter
[Flemish] Go take a shower.
[French] My daughter, the bride,
is the only one in white.
[Angelique, French] Right.
And the guests will wear different colors.
Okay. That's right.
- Bye.
- I'll see you tonight.
[blender whirrs]
[Flemish] Your pills.
- Don't forget them.
- I won't.
[tinny pop music over speaker]
Thank you, ma'am. That will be 720 Euros.
That makes 100, 200, 300,
400, 500, 600.
Daan, can you spare 120 Euros
for your mom?
- I have to get something from the car.
- Okay.
Come here, lad.
I'll say this just once: at the first sign
of trouble, I'm throwing you out.
I didn't even want to be at
this fucking campsite, so don't worry.
And 120 more.
Yes, thank you.
Mrs. Van Lishout,
I wish you a nice stay in Cadzand-Bad.
I'm sure it will be. Thank you.
[Daan] Mrs. Van Lishout?
Yeah What a crazy bitch.
Of course we're stopping by later on.
[Christine] Great.
Margaux is just labeling the Fontana.
Does Patrick still want it?
[Eleonore] He's 99 percent certain,
but he wants to see it in the flesh.
[Christine] Of course.
[Eleonore] See you later.
[Christine] Bye, sweetie.
Good morning.
Good morning.
Olivia? Hi there.
- Weren't you at the hairdresser's?
- What's that?
Weren't you at the hairdresser's?
Yes, but I suddenly didn't feel like it
anymore. I went to the bakery instead.
- [Olivia] Did you bring cupcakes?
- Yes, and small pastries.
Where's Dad?
- I don't know.
- Where's Dad?
And nanny Isabel?
I have no clue.
[soft, ominous music]
- [knocks on door]
- [Eleonore] Patrick?
- [door handle rattles]
- [Eleonore] Pa
- [Eleonore] I know she's in here.
- [Patrick] Huh?
[Eleonore] Isabel? Come here, girl.
I know you're in there.
- Mom. Mom, she's here.
- [Eleonore] Isabel?!
- Ma'am?
- [Eleonore] Huh?
I'm done with you, Isabel.
I'd like you to pack your things.
- What did I do wrong?
- Didn't you hear me?!
- Mom, please.
- Alex.
I don't want to see you again.
- But ma'am, I
- [Eleonore shouts]
[Isabel] Sir, please
You heard my wife.
[Daan sighs]
So, what do you think?
- Well, it's
- [Melissa] Really nice, right?
Look, a toaster oven.
- Look.
- [Daan chuckles]
[Melissa] The bathroom is fairly big.
Really nice shower.
Oh, this room is even bigger.
This is really nice.
Look at this: mirror, little desk.
This is a good place to work
on your photo thingies.
[Melissa] Daan, are you out of money?
No, but someone still owes me 300 Euros.
[melancholy music]
[Alex] Mom.
- Listen
- No, son. No.
- Okay Mom, I'm going.
- Do you have everything? Your phone?
- Yes.
- Yeah?
- Bye, Mom.
- Bye.
["Lipgloss" by Ruby Grace plays]
I only wear cherry
Leave it like a print on a tea cup ♪
[Alex chuckles]
I dreamed of fingers through my hair ♪
A strong force pulling it ♪
Hurting me like it's fair ♪
[song switches to headphones]
You know I like it though ♪
[music stops abruptly]
- Can I ask
- [server] Just a sec.
[Alex] Matti, we can do better, really.
[Matti] I understand,
but there's much more to it.
You can't just open up a club.
You need an entire concept.
- Think, bro.
- No need to come up with something new.
You can copy the Casino Club and make it
better, more stylish and more expensive.
- [Matti] More stylish and more expensive?
- [Alex] Yes. Horny, like designer sex.
- [Matti] Designer sex
- [mutters]
What about the name:
- Crazy Lulu?
- [Victor] Crazy Lulu. Don't like it, no.
Lou Lou is a cheap perfume too, isn't it?
No, not the perfume.
You spell it with two U's.
- Luhluh?
- [Alex] No, not Luhluh.
You spell it with two U's
and it sounds like Lulu.
[everybody tries to pronounce it]
[Matti] Isn't that a biscuit brand?
Matti, if you have nothing sensible
to say, just be quiet.
Those little bears and letters
in a big bag.
- We have them at home.
- Lulu is a play, right?
That's it, a play.
About a fancy, lesbian whore
in the days of Jack the Ripper.
- That's fairly blunt, Alex.
- Matti has to be able to understand it.
[Margaux laughs] Really
[Matti] And you're our great drama lover?
Come on.
- [Daan] I am
- [server] Come with me.
[Daan] Oh, okay.
- Stop staring.
- What?
- Hey
- [Louise] What?
Jacques, here's the temp.
- Hey, good morning.
- That's about time.
Afraid it's gonna get stolen?
No, I forgot my lock.
[Jacques] Catering experience: none.
Uh, Daan.
[exasperated] Surname.
- Paroti.
- [Jacques] What?
- Peroni Surinamese?
- Half.
Half. [laughs]
Here. Fill these in and you can start
making some money.
- Yeah.
- I'll go get your uniform.
They need a new titty bar in Knokke
like a hole in the head.
- Please, it's no titty bar, dude!
- That's what it amounts to, doesn't it?
No! You know nothing of doing business.
Is that what they teach you
in Business School?
Apart from American football and rugby.
- Field hockey, not rugby.
- [Alex] Oh, sorry hoor.
[Victor] Nice.
- [Jacques] Put it on your head.
- [Daan] My head?
[Jacques] Yes, on your head. Up you go.
- [Margaux scoffs]
- And now call out.
- [Daan, quietly] Custard donuts.
[Jacques] Louder, Daan.
People can't hear you like that.
- [Jacques] Custard donuts!
- Still interested?
[Jacques] Custard donuts! Louder.
He works for his money.
- [Daan] Fresh custard donuts!
- [Jacques] Fresh donuts!
[Jacques and Daan] Custard donuts!
[Matti] Where did they get that joker?
He's new.
- [Victor] Yes.
- [Daan] Custard donuts!
- [Victor] I'd like to taste his donuts.
- [Matti] Of course.
[Jacques] There we go.
[Victor] Good afternoon.
- [Daan] Hi.
- [Margaux] Hello.
- I don't want that.
- [Louise] What?
[Margaux] Those donuts.
- [Victor] I never tried them.
- [Louise] I'll get too fat for my clothes.
How many do you want?
What's your name?
[Victor] Hmmm, little Daan.
You don't look like a Daan.
[scoffs] I hear that a lot.
Your tray is teetering.
No, it's okay, man.
Here you go.
- [everybody laughs]
- [Margaux] Poor boy.
[Alex] Sorry.
- [Louise] Come on.
- I'm sorry. That wasn't on purpose.
[Daan] Never mind, I'll get a new one.
- Here you go.
- Would you like one too?
- [they all laugh]
- Yeah I was just going to ask
I'm sorry, I thought
Well, I say
[all] Oh!
[Alex] I told him it was teetering,
but he was like,
[imitating Daan] "No, it's okay, man."
[Margaux] On his first day.
[Margaux] What will Jacques say?
[the gang laughs, ominous music]
- [glass shatters]
- [all] Hey!
Now it's straight!
- [Matti] Are you insane?
- [Margaux] Alex, are you okay?
- [Alex] Yes, I'm alright.
- [Matti] Is it out?
Did you get it?
Hey. What's happening here?
Daan dropped his tray with donuts.
On your face?
Come with me. Come.
[Matti] Continue working. Come, mate.
[Jacques] It's okay, people.
Accidents happen.
- [Victor] Your teeth okay?
- I'm going to the bathroom.
[Matti] What was that, man?
[boy, crying] Daddy!
[father] Come on, back up.
[melancholy music]
[people chattering in the background]
Hey. [whistles] Jacques.
- You're not firing that kid, are you?
- Too late, Alex. It's done.
- You're not a racist, are you?
- What do you think?
It doesn't matter what I think.
It's about what other people think, buddy.
That's up to those people.
- [Daan] Fucking Knokke
- [Anouk] Having a nice holiday?
- Knokke. Arrogant, rich bastards.
- Ah
You see those all the time here.
[Daan chuckles]
- Daan.
- Daan.
So I can follow you.
- We chavs have to stick together.
- [snickers]
- Do brown chavs exist?
- [laughs] Sure. Those are the worst.
- Getting a good look?
- [laughs]
- Sorry, I was looking at your T-shirt.
- Hmm.
- Casino Club, what's that?
- A nightclub in Knokke.
Full of rich, arrogant bastards.
- Fun?
- It pays well.
I can tell. Nice iPhone.
Want to buy it?
If I want an iPhone,
I can steal it by myself.
[car approaches]
Do you develop your photos yourself?
- No, I take them to the store.
- Hmm.
- I'd really like to see them.
- [car door closes]
Especially those of me.
This afternoon, in the sun.
[moped starts]
I have to go, Daan.
No, keep it.
- [Melissa] Hey.
- [Daan] Hey.
Wait, before I forget.
Un, dos, tres.
- Where did you get this?
- I stole an electric bike. [chuckles]
Yeah, right.
I borrowed it from an old friend.
- Since when do you have friends?
- I used to be young, once.
- I have friends of my own.
- Really?
[rap music playing]
[Melissa] Daan, how was your job?
[rap song continues over headphones]
- Are you sleeping there?
- Yes.
- On that thing?
- Yes.
Right. Uhm, how was your job?
Good. I have nice boss.
Okay, bye.
- Good luck.
- Yeah.
[rap song continues over headphones]
[rap song continues on full sound]
[piano music playing, crowd chattering]
- [Angelique] Hi!
- Hi, darling.
[indistinct greetings]
- Hi! You look beautiful.
- [Emilie] Thank you.
- [Angelique] Hi, sweetie.
- Hi, Mom.
I've said it before and I'll say it again:
Crazy Lulu is a ridiculous name.
[Alex] Are you drinking two glasses?
- I'm thirsty.
- As long as you don't puke on my shoes.
I remember last time. You forget.
I had the globs on my shoes.
[Louise] I was wearing sandals.
- [Angelique] Hey, I heard your nanny quit.
- [Eleonore] Yes. Can you believe it?
- Olivia told me.
- Without notice and without a word.
I can't really complain,
because she is going to nursing school.
Oh my, so selfish.
[ominous tone]
- [chuckles]
- Your dad is here.
- Fabian, I'll join you later.
- Ah, there he is.
[indistinct chatter]
Hi, Patrick.
[Christine] Patrick!
- So nice that you're here.
- Christine, hi.
- Show me.
- Yes. [laughs]
- [Margaux talks indistinctly]
- Hey
Is your mom selling the Fontana to my dad?
- [Margaux] Hm-mm.
- [Matti] Fontana?
[Louise] One of the great Minimalists,
together with Max Baumann.
[Alex] The white canvas with the tears.
- That's it, three tears?
- That's why its Minimalist, Matti.
It's the smallest thing here. [laughs]
- It's truly beautiful.
- [Angelique] Yes, really.
[ominous tone]
- [Louise chuckles]
- [Matti] How much are they asking for it?
[Margaux] My mom wants
1.7 million, that's it.
"That's it?" 1.7 million for three tears.
- I could do something better with that.
- [Matti] Opening a titty bar, right Lex?
[laughs] The Crazy Lulu.
Or have you thought of a better name yet?
Shall we move on to business,
before we're all too drunk?
- [laughs] Follow me.
- I think they closed the deal.
- [Matti] 1.7 million.
- [Louise laughs]
[Matti] I know what I would do with that.
Right, Victor?
I would by a luxury yacht in Saint-Tropez.
[dialogue fades]
I'm going to pee.
[phone chimes]
[muffled dialogue and laughter]
[Christine] The Fontana is
now officially yours.
[kissing sounds]
[Christine] What about the guests?
- The guests are waiting.
- [Patrick] Let them.
[Christine chuckles]
[Christine moaning]
[Christine] Here, yes.
- Where are they? This is the last piece.
- Yeah
I'll have a look.
[Christine moaning]
[Alex sniffles]
[footsteps on stairs]
[Eleonore] This is Olivia's last piece.
Where's Dad?
- Mom
- What?
[Christine] Okay, congratulations.
- [Eleonore] Olivia's on her last piece.
- [Patrick] Yes.
- We had to sign this.
- [Eleonore] Yes, great.
- [Angelique] Is it done?
- Yes. It's done.
[last notes of piece]
[mouths] Good job.
[Patrick] Beautiful, Olive Oil.
Great, darling.
Come on, take a bow.
- [crowd applauding]
- Ah! Bravo!
- Such a talent.
- She's a crack.
I'd enter her
in the Queen Elisabeth Competition.
Yes! She plays better than her teacher.
He says so himself.
- Chopin and Debussy, much better.
- [Christine laughs] I have to
- Really great party, Christine.
- Thanks!
[sighs] I'm not staying long.
Darling, tomorrow morning?
- Yes, ten o'clock at Natan's.
- For Emilie's wedding?
Hmm. Are you coming?
Can I drop in soon?
- For an injection?
- It's been nearly three months.
- [phone rings]
- Okay.
Oh! This can't be true.
It's as if they can smell it. [sighs]
- An emergency in the hospital.
- Again? Go.
Darling, I have an emergency.
- [Jan] What?
- At the hospital?
[Jan] Darling. Emergency.
[Angelique] Congratulations.
- Thank you.
- [glasses clink]
[Angelique laughs]
Has your dad left?
He always has emergencies
when he's not enjoying himself.
Right then
- I'm done here as well.
- [Louise] We did our duty.
- Come on, I've heard enough piano.
- [Louise chortles]
Thank you.
[phone beeps]
- Good evening.
- [bouncer] Good evening.
- Do you have an invite?
- Yes, from Anouk.
- Anouk? Doesn't ring a bell.
- No?
Short lady, black hair, lots of tattoos.
[voices approaching]
- [Alex] Aah
- Thomas.
- [bouncer] Good evening.
[Louise] Hi.
- [Matti] Good evening, boss.
- [Victor] Good evening.
Maybe she's inside.
- She'll recognize me once she sees me.
- No, man.
He's with us.
- Have fun.
- Thanks.
Welcome to Knokke, bitch.
[disco music]
[girl] Whooo!
[Alex] Champagne!
Here's your girlfriend.
That is truly a hot chick.
- Hey, Daan.
- Hi.
Are those the rich bastards?
What the fuck?!
Don't be shy!
[all] Oh!
[indistinct chatter]
[dance music plays]
[quiet dialogue]
[music becomes distant]
[they both moan]
You're thinking about him.
- Who?
- I saw you looking.
You know damn well who.
You're crazy.
You drive me crazy.
[rhythmic treadmill sound]
[soft, melancholy music plays]
[Daan] Hi Mom, I'm pulling an all-nighter.
I'll be back tomorrow morning.
[Louise] Daan?!
- [Daan] Bye.
- [Alex] Daan, come.
- [girl screams in background]
[melancholy music continues]
[the gang laughs and screams]
[Louise squeals]
[laughing and screaming]
- [all scream]
- Matti!
[melancholy music continues]
- [Louise] Alex, no.
- [Victor] Come on, join.
[Louise] No!
[they all scream]
[Daan] Whoo!
[waves crash]
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