Lego City Adventures (2019) s03e03 Episode Script
Shirley P.I.
1
[theme music]
[explosion]
[siren blaring]
[tires screeching]
[siren blaring]
[Shirley Keeper]
It was a chilly night
in the big city and the garbage
was stinkier than a skunk's gym socks.
I was sorting through
the McCloud's trash
when I found an unexpired
carton of eggs.
To a seasoned sanitation
professional like myself,
it could only mean one thing.
Mark McCloud was worried
that birds are judging him again.
Yeah, if you know how to listen,
the trash always
has a story to tell.
Little did I know,
I was about to be tossed
into the plot, myself.
In other news,
tonight is the highly anticipated
Show of Fashion at City Center Park,
where clothing designer
Wixty Pillion Lollars
will debut his new fall collection.
This fall is all about hats!
Lots and lots of hats!
You can't have too many hats! [giggles]
[gasps] I was wrong!
At least good news reporting
never goes out of fashion, right, Craig?
Yes, as always,
thank you, Craig Woodman,
for your valuable insight.
Oh!
I am now pleased
to announce the winner
of this year's City Television
News Awards.
The winner of Best Anchor
Not Named Craig Woodman
On The Nightly News With
Craig Woodman
and Gabby Tocamera is
Craig Woodman!
What? How is that
Congratulations, Craig.
Craig? Craig?
[crew gasping]
Where did he go?
[indistinct chatter]
Then I looked over
and Craig was gone.
You looked over
and Craig was gone?
I don't know what happened.
You don't know what happened?
Are you just repeating everything I say
in a really sarcastic tone?
Come on, Gabby,
you've always resented Craig's success.
Him winning best news anchor
was the last straw.
It's what we call motive.
Or he just hopped a freight train
to ride the rails like a hobo.
Grizzled, I thought
we were doing Good Cop, Bad Cop?
Nope. We're doing Good cop,
Wild Guess cop.
So, Craig mastered the jazz flute
and joined a progressive
rock band, huh?
Look, I admit I was annoyed
Craig won that award, but
Ha! So you admit it!
I only admit to being annoyed!
That's the first thing
I do every morning.
This is ridiculous!
If you aren't charging me,
then I'm free to go.
Yeah, we're outta here.
Grizzled, sit.
Okay, fine, get all hung up on the law,
but I know you're involved
with Woodman's disappearance
and I am gonna prove it!
And I'll prove Craig went on safari,
defeated a dominant male
gorilla and became troop leader.
No more Good Cop,
Wild Guess cop!
Time for Good Cop, Napping Cop.
[snoring]
[Shirley] I was on
my normal uptown route,
where even the garbage is classy,
when she walked up,
Gabby Tocamera.
She looked as nervous
as a balloon in a tack factory.
You okay, Gabby?
You look really guilty
of something.
Hey, just because I'm
super annoyed Craig Woodman
won my award doesn't mean
I had him kidnapped, okay?
I just meant you were guilty
of not brushing your teeth
because of your toothache.
Wait, how'd you know
I had a toothache?
A slice of pizza
in your garbage.
The bite pattern indicates
you're chewing on the left side
of your mouth
due to a sore right molar.
You got that
from a slice of pizza?
With this sharp eye,
you can tell a lot about people
from their trash.
The police think I kidnapped
Craig Woodman.
Maybe you could use that sharp eye
to help me clear my name.
Me? [laughs]
I'm a garbage lady, not a detective.
It took three dentists to figure out
what you did from looking
at a piece of pizza!
I need you,
oh garbage whisperer.
[Shirley] Now the trash
was telling me a new story,
and it needed a hero.
Guess I'm not just
a garbage lady anymore.
I'm Shirley Keeper, Garbage P.I..
To find out what happened to Woodman,
I went back to the scene
of the crime, the newsroom.
Craig Woodman's tie.
[Todd] Hands off!
I saw it first!
Who are you?
I'm Todd, professional acting
student and understudy
for the President of the Craig
Woodman fan club.
I just came from rehearsing
my one-man show,
Still Life:
A Portrait Of Craig Woodman.
So what do you
want with the tie?
I own the largest collection
of Craig Woodman
memorabilia in the world,
A comb that was once used on his hair.
Impressive.
I guess the ultimate
Craig Woodman collectible
would be Craig Woodman himself.
What do you know
about his disappearance?
Nothing! I'm just Todd,
an actor who can't even
get a speaking part
in his own one-man play!
[sobbing]
Cut the waterworks, Todd.
You're not getting the tie.
[gasps] Drat!
Shirley?
What are you doing here?
I found a clue in the trash
you overlooked.
Craig Woodman's tie.
The kidnapper left it behind.
[Grizzled] You're wasting
your time, Shirley.
Those guys go through ties
like paper napkins.
Besides, we found proof Gabby
Tocamera's behind this.
She made Craig disappear
so she never has to work
with him again!
We are in the tenth hour
of this breaking story
and my voice
could really use a rest.
Craig? Craig?
Say something right now
or I'm gonna make you disappear
so I never have to work
with you again!
Okay, I admit that looks
pretty bad for Gabby
but the garbage is telling
a different story.
Shirley, this is a police matter.
Please stay out of it!
Yeah. Let's stick to our own jobs.
You don't do any detective work
and I won't throw out my trash.
[Shirley]
The questions piled up
like garbage metaphors.
Was Gabby guilty?
There's nothing dirtier
than a crook's trash,
so if Gabby did kidnap Craig,
her garbage would've confessed to me.
And why was Todd the actor
so hard on himself?
I once saw him play a tree
and it actually changed
the way I looked at bark.
Well, the trash got me this far,
so I'll keep following its scent
to Craig Woodman's house,
just in time for a little
Q and A with his bin.
[Midden screams]
Supermodel Midden Fleasure!
What are you doing
in Craig Woodman's garbage?
I have a crush on Craig Woodman
but he does not like me back!
I found these notes I passed
to Craig unopened in his trash can!
"I like you. Do you like me?
Mark the box for yes or no."
He did not mark any boxes!
No one makes a fool of
Midden Fleasure but herself.
[groans]
An invitation to the Show of Fashion?
Looks like Craig Woodman
has two bins,
-Friends and enemies.
-[siren wailing]
Shirley, you're under arrest
for the kidnapping of Craig Woodman!
I had nothing to do
with Craig's disappearance.
Then why'd we find one leg of
Craig's pants in Gabby's trash
and the other leg
in your garbage truck?
One pair of pants split on
opposite sides of the city?
No one is that limber.
Someone is obviously
trying to frame me!
[bangs]
Ha! Yes!
I fooled those clueless cops
and escaped my jail cell
to sweet, sweet freedom?
Oh, of all the luck.
-[yells]
-[groans]
[Shirley] Somehow,
I found myself
-neck-deep in trash.
-[siren wailing]
Then it hit me. The tie, the pants,
all the evidence involves Craig's clothes,
and where do you find clothes?
The Show of Fashion!
Luckily there's enough
glitz and glamor
at a fashion show to let me root
around for clues unnoticed.
[Wixty] You!
Why aren't you on the runway?
We must get my amazing new look
in front of the people immediately!
But this is what I wore all day.
Exactly!
It's the most innovative
fashion idea of all time!
Clothes that people
actually wear!
Uh? Right! To the runway!
[crowd cheering and applauding]
[camera shutters clicking]
It's like she stepped
right off the street,
after escaping police custody!
Jah, It is so boring and normal
in the most hardcore way.
I shall call this look
Normcore, if asked.
[giggling] I'm such a genius
I don't even remember
designing it!
[Shirley] This is it.
The garbage led me here,
to this moment.
Time to flush out the crook!
If you like this look, say, "Hey!"
-[crowd] Hey!
-If you repeat after others, say, "Ho!"
-[crowd] Ho!
-If you kidnapped Craig Woodman,
say, "I confess!"
I confess!
[all gasping]
I got caught up in the moment.
[whimpers]
-[engine revving]
-[siren wailing]
-[Todd grunts]
-[Midden] Effort. Effort.
[siren wailing]
Why'd you kidnap
Craig Woodman, Wixty?
I've always marveled at how
exquisite he looks in a suit.
He is the perfect model
for my new men's clothing line!
[Todd and Midden panting]
So, why'd we find evidence
in Gabby's garbage and Shirley's truck?
I planted it to throw you off my trail.
I just couldn't lose Craig as a model!
This Craig Woodman Mannequin
will double the size
of my memorabilia collection!
That is no mannequin.
See how he ignores me,
specifically?
That is my Craigy-Bear.
[Rooky] Shirley,
I owe you an apology.
I, probably, correctly, even in hindsight,
underestimated listening to garbage.
Your detective skills are truly amazing.
Thanks. I'm just glad
the right person's going to jail.
Say, do I really need to,
you know, go to jail? [laughs]
Look, Craig is so happy in my suit.
He never complained once!
Well, whaddya say, Craig?
Do you want to press charges
against Wixty?
Whatever. Less work for us.
We're just letting
the bad guy get away?
Don't think of it as him getting away,
think of it as, ah recycling.
[Todd and Midden grunting]
[Shirley] And so Shirley Keeper,
Garbage P.I.'s first case is closed.
Nice and tidy, just the way I like it.
[theme music]
[theme music]
[explosion]
[siren blaring]
[tires screeching]
[siren blaring]
[Shirley Keeper]
It was a chilly night
in the big city and the garbage
was stinkier than a skunk's gym socks.
I was sorting through
the McCloud's trash
when I found an unexpired
carton of eggs.
To a seasoned sanitation
professional like myself,
it could only mean one thing.
Mark McCloud was worried
that birds are judging him again.
Yeah, if you know how to listen,
the trash always
has a story to tell.
Little did I know,
I was about to be tossed
into the plot, myself.
In other news,
tonight is the highly anticipated
Show of Fashion at City Center Park,
where clothing designer
Wixty Pillion Lollars
will debut his new fall collection.
This fall is all about hats!
Lots and lots of hats!
You can't have too many hats! [giggles]
[gasps] I was wrong!
At least good news reporting
never goes out of fashion, right, Craig?
Yes, as always,
thank you, Craig Woodman,
for your valuable insight.
Oh!
I am now pleased
to announce the winner
of this year's City Television
News Awards.
The winner of Best Anchor
Not Named Craig Woodman
On The Nightly News With
Craig Woodman
and Gabby Tocamera is
Craig Woodman!
What? How is that
Congratulations, Craig.
Craig? Craig?
[crew gasping]
Where did he go?
[indistinct chatter]
Then I looked over
and Craig was gone.
You looked over
and Craig was gone?
I don't know what happened.
You don't know what happened?
Are you just repeating everything I say
in a really sarcastic tone?
Come on, Gabby,
you've always resented Craig's success.
Him winning best news anchor
was the last straw.
It's what we call motive.
Or he just hopped a freight train
to ride the rails like a hobo.
Grizzled, I thought
we were doing Good Cop, Bad Cop?
Nope. We're doing Good cop,
Wild Guess cop.
So, Craig mastered the jazz flute
and joined a progressive
rock band, huh?
Look, I admit I was annoyed
Craig won that award, but
Ha! So you admit it!
I only admit to being annoyed!
That's the first thing
I do every morning.
This is ridiculous!
If you aren't charging me,
then I'm free to go.
Yeah, we're outta here.
Grizzled, sit.
Okay, fine, get all hung up on the law,
but I know you're involved
with Woodman's disappearance
and I am gonna prove it!
And I'll prove Craig went on safari,
defeated a dominant male
gorilla and became troop leader.
No more Good Cop,
Wild Guess cop!
Time for Good Cop, Napping Cop.
[snoring]
[Shirley] I was on
my normal uptown route,
where even the garbage is classy,
when she walked up,
Gabby Tocamera.
She looked as nervous
as a balloon in a tack factory.
You okay, Gabby?
You look really guilty
of something.
Hey, just because I'm
super annoyed Craig Woodman
won my award doesn't mean
I had him kidnapped, okay?
I just meant you were guilty
of not brushing your teeth
because of your toothache.
Wait, how'd you know
I had a toothache?
A slice of pizza
in your garbage.
The bite pattern indicates
you're chewing on the left side
of your mouth
due to a sore right molar.
You got that
from a slice of pizza?
With this sharp eye,
you can tell a lot about people
from their trash.
The police think I kidnapped
Craig Woodman.
Maybe you could use that sharp eye
to help me clear my name.
Me? [laughs]
I'm a garbage lady, not a detective.
It took three dentists to figure out
what you did from looking
at a piece of pizza!
I need you,
oh garbage whisperer.
[Shirley] Now the trash
was telling me a new story,
and it needed a hero.
Guess I'm not just
a garbage lady anymore.
I'm Shirley Keeper, Garbage P.I..
To find out what happened to Woodman,
I went back to the scene
of the crime, the newsroom.
Craig Woodman's tie.
[Todd] Hands off!
I saw it first!
Who are you?
I'm Todd, professional acting
student and understudy
for the President of the Craig
Woodman fan club.
I just came from rehearsing
my one-man show,
Still Life:
A Portrait Of Craig Woodman.
So what do you
want with the tie?
I own the largest collection
of Craig Woodman
memorabilia in the world,
A comb that was once used on his hair.
Impressive.
I guess the ultimate
Craig Woodman collectible
would be Craig Woodman himself.
What do you know
about his disappearance?
Nothing! I'm just Todd,
an actor who can't even
get a speaking part
in his own one-man play!
[sobbing]
Cut the waterworks, Todd.
You're not getting the tie.
[gasps] Drat!
Shirley?
What are you doing here?
I found a clue in the trash
you overlooked.
Craig Woodman's tie.
The kidnapper left it behind.
[Grizzled] You're wasting
your time, Shirley.
Those guys go through ties
like paper napkins.
Besides, we found proof Gabby
Tocamera's behind this.
She made Craig disappear
so she never has to work
with him again!
We are in the tenth hour
of this breaking story
and my voice
could really use a rest.
Craig? Craig?
Say something right now
or I'm gonna make you disappear
so I never have to work
with you again!
Okay, I admit that looks
pretty bad for Gabby
but the garbage is telling
a different story.
Shirley, this is a police matter.
Please stay out of it!
Yeah. Let's stick to our own jobs.
You don't do any detective work
and I won't throw out my trash.
[Shirley]
The questions piled up
like garbage metaphors.
Was Gabby guilty?
There's nothing dirtier
than a crook's trash,
so if Gabby did kidnap Craig,
her garbage would've confessed to me.
And why was Todd the actor
so hard on himself?
I once saw him play a tree
and it actually changed
the way I looked at bark.
Well, the trash got me this far,
so I'll keep following its scent
to Craig Woodman's house,
just in time for a little
Q and A with his bin.
[Midden screams]
Supermodel Midden Fleasure!
What are you doing
in Craig Woodman's garbage?
I have a crush on Craig Woodman
but he does not like me back!
I found these notes I passed
to Craig unopened in his trash can!
"I like you. Do you like me?
Mark the box for yes or no."
He did not mark any boxes!
No one makes a fool of
Midden Fleasure but herself.
[groans]
An invitation to the Show of Fashion?
Looks like Craig Woodman
has two bins,
-Friends and enemies.
-[siren wailing]
Shirley, you're under arrest
for the kidnapping of Craig Woodman!
I had nothing to do
with Craig's disappearance.
Then why'd we find one leg of
Craig's pants in Gabby's trash
and the other leg
in your garbage truck?
One pair of pants split on
opposite sides of the city?
No one is that limber.
Someone is obviously
trying to frame me!
[bangs]
Ha! Yes!
I fooled those clueless cops
and escaped my jail cell
to sweet, sweet freedom?
Oh, of all the luck.
-[yells]
-[groans]
[Shirley] Somehow,
I found myself
-neck-deep in trash.
-[siren wailing]
Then it hit me. The tie, the pants,
all the evidence involves Craig's clothes,
and where do you find clothes?
The Show of Fashion!
Luckily there's enough
glitz and glamor
at a fashion show to let me root
around for clues unnoticed.
[Wixty] You!
Why aren't you on the runway?
We must get my amazing new look
in front of the people immediately!
But this is what I wore all day.
Exactly!
It's the most innovative
fashion idea of all time!
Clothes that people
actually wear!
Uh? Right! To the runway!
[crowd cheering and applauding]
[camera shutters clicking]
It's like she stepped
right off the street,
after escaping police custody!
Jah, It is so boring and normal
in the most hardcore way.
I shall call this look
Normcore, if asked.
[giggling] I'm such a genius
I don't even remember
designing it!
[Shirley] This is it.
The garbage led me here,
to this moment.
Time to flush out the crook!
If you like this look, say, "Hey!"
-[crowd] Hey!
-If you repeat after others, say, "Ho!"
-[crowd] Ho!
-If you kidnapped Craig Woodman,
say, "I confess!"
I confess!
[all gasping]
I got caught up in the moment.
[whimpers]
-[engine revving]
-[siren wailing]
-[Todd grunts]
-[Midden] Effort. Effort.
[siren wailing]
Why'd you kidnap
Craig Woodman, Wixty?
I've always marveled at how
exquisite he looks in a suit.
He is the perfect model
for my new men's clothing line!
[Todd and Midden panting]
So, why'd we find evidence
in Gabby's garbage and Shirley's truck?
I planted it to throw you off my trail.
I just couldn't lose Craig as a model!
This Craig Woodman Mannequin
will double the size
of my memorabilia collection!
That is no mannequin.
See how he ignores me,
specifically?
That is my Craigy-Bear.
[Rooky] Shirley,
I owe you an apology.
I, probably, correctly, even in hindsight,
underestimated listening to garbage.
Your detective skills are truly amazing.
Thanks. I'm just glad
the right person's going to jail.
Say, do I really need to,
you know, go to jail? [laughs]
Look, Craig is so happy in my suit.
He never complained once!
Well, whaddya say, Craig?
Do you want to press charges
against Wixty?
Whatever. Less work for us.
We're just letting
the bad guy get away?
Don't think of it as him getting away,
think of it as, ah recycling.
[Todd and Midden grunting]
[Shirley] And so Shirley Keeper,
Garbage P.I.'s first case is closed.
Nice and tidy, just the way I like it.
[theme music]