Lip Sync Battle (2015) s05e09 Episode Script

1 - Hit it! - (FUNKY MUSIC PLAYING) It takes two to make a thing go right - Hit it! - I wanna rock right now I'm not internationally known But I'm known to rock a microphone Because I get stupid, I mean outrageous Stay away from me if you're contagious Like one, two, three, get loose now It takes two What is up, Lip Sync nation? Hello, hello.
Tonight is gonna be a battle for the ages.
But first, let's bring out the lyric master who stands the test of time.
Give it up, everyone, it's your host, LL Cool J! (HEADSPRUNG BY LL COOL J PLAYS) They call me Big L'y, Big Silly - Hands up! - Big Money, Big Billy Hands up! Turn the music up! Let me hear you say, "hell yeah!" AUDIENCE: Hell yeah! - LL COOL J: Now, scream! - (SCREAMING) - And we 'bout to get our - Headsprung - And we 'bout to get our - Headsprung And we 'bout to get our 'Ey yo! She's poetic.
She's magnetic.
She's hypoallergenic.
She is Chrissy Teigen! (CHEERING AND APPLAUSE) - Hello! - Whaddup? Hello, LL! - LL COOL J: What's happenin'? - Good crowd! LL COOL J: Welcome to Lip Sync Battle, and this is the show where dreams become reality.
As we bring together incredible music with your favorite stars to deliver you the absolute time of your life, you know that without a doubt, right? You do know that, right? (CHEERING AND APPLAUSE) It's the cast of Younger showdown! Let's get it! She delivered in the movie Sully.
And brought the fire in Transparent, and now she can be seen as Lauren Heller in Younger.
Make some noise for Molly Bernard.
- (DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYS) - (CHEERING AND APPLAUSE) They have dazzled you in the movie Scream 4, and The Following.
They can be seen staring alongside Molly in Younger.
Give it up for Nico Tortorella! - (DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYS) - (CHEERING AND APPLAUSE) (CHUCKLES) Ohh! LL COOL J: Welcome to Lip Sync Battle, Nico, we're gonna let you go first.
- Oh! - LL Cool J: Nico, come on over.
(CHEERING AND APPLAUSE) LL COOL J: Tell the people what kind of vibe you're trying to strike with this first song? Oh, vibes.
I'm all about the vibes these days.
It's really exhausting.
Um, love, really.
That's it, this is the, you know - (CHEERING) - Yes! Well, here to give you some love.
- (MOANS) Uh.
- Love vibe, put your hands together for Nico Tortorella! (CHEERING AND APPLAUSE) (WHERE IS THE LOVE? BY BLACK EYED PEAS PLAYS) What's wrong with the world, mama? People livin' like they ain't got no mamas I think the whole world's addicted to the drama Only attracted to the things that'll bring a trauma Overseas, yeah, we tryin' to stop terrorism But we still got terrorists here livin' - In the USA, the big CIA - CHRISSY: In the USA.
The Bloods and the Crips, and the KKK But if you only have love for your own race Then you only leave space to discriminate Man, you gotta have love, this'll set us straight Take control of your mind and meditate Let your soul gravitate to the love, y'all People killin', people dyin' Children hurt and you hear them cryin' Can you practice what you preach? And would you turn the other cheek? Father, father, father, help us Send some guidance from above These people got me, got me questionin' - Where is the love? - Love Where is the love? Where is the love? Where is the love, the love, the love I feel the weight of the world on my shoulder As I'm getting older, y'all people gets colder Most of us only care about money-makin' Selfishness got us followin' the wrong direction Whatever happened to the values of humanity? Whatever happened to the fairness and equality? It's no wonder why sometimes I'm feelin' under Gotta keep my faith alive 'til love is found Father, father, father, help us Send some guidance from above These people got me, got me questionin' Where is the love? (CHEERING AND APPLAUSE) LL COOL J: Nico! CHRISSY: That has been one of my top five favorite songs.
- We need that song more than ever now.
- NICO: Yes! Right now, y'all, right now! More than ever we need the love.
And and Chrissy, what did you think of what Nico just did? What did you think of the vibe? What'd you think? I mean, you got down on your knees.
Anyone that can get down on their knees at this point I'll get down on a knee for you, Chrissy, anytime.
Anytime.
- (LAUGHS) - LL COOL J: So, Molly.
MOLLY: Yes.
How would you best describe Nico's performance? MOLLY: Uh, I would best describe it as elegant, graceful, filled with charisma, uniqueness, nerve, and talent.
- NICO: Yes, ma'am! - Um (CHEERING AND APPLAUSE) And I am a fair sportsman, and my hat goes off to you, my love.
LL COOL J: Okay.
Well, damn.
Nico, you can head on over to the VIP.
Absolutely.
Molly, come on over.
Oh, I miss that song! LL COOL J: Come on over, Molly.
So, Molly, what's the tone of this song you're going with? Your first choice? What's the tone you're trying to set? Yeah, yeah, no, that's a great question.
- This is a really good question, um - (LAUGHTER) The tone that I'd like to set is kinda like a prepare yourself to, um get ready to get your your little tuchus kicked.
(CHEERING AND APPLAUSE) Ladies and gentlemen, give it up for Molly Bernard! (CHEERING AND APPLAUSE) This is for you.
(ONE WAY OR ANOTHER BY BLONDIE PLAYS) Ohh-ho-ho-ho One way or another I'm gonna find ya I'm gonna get ya, get ya, get ya, get ya One way or another I'm gonna win ya I'm gonna get ya, get ya, get ya, get ya One way or another I'm gonna see ya I'm gonna meet ya, meet ya, meet ya, meet ya One day, maybe next week I'm gonna meet ya I'm gonna meet ya, I'll meet ya I will drive past your house And if the lights are all down I'll see who's around One way or another I'm gonna lose ya I'm gonna give you the slip A slip of the hip or another I'm gonna lose ya I'm gonna trick ya, I'll trick ya One way or another I'm gonna lose ya I'm gonna trick ya, trick ya, trick ya, trick ya One way or another I'm gonna lose ya I'm gonna give you the slip I'll walk down the mall Stand over by the wall Where I can see it all Find out who ya call One way or another I'm gonna get ya, I'll get ya, get ya, get ya, get ya One way or another I'm gonna get ya, I'll get ya, get ya, get ya, get ya One way or another I'm gonna get ya, I'll get ya, get ya, get ya, get ya (CHEERING AND APPLAUSE) LL COOL J: Make some noise, Molly Bernard, make some noise! CHRISSY: That was unexpected.
Shout out to whoever makes that fabric.
- It is very versatile.
- (MOLLY LAUGHS) - Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- It was incredible.
I did not you're so cute and tiny, and then you just (BLEEP) went for it.
- It was awesome! - MOLLY: Thank you.
- Thank you, thank you.
- CHRISSY: Wow! (CHEERING AND APPLAUSE) All right, so, Nico.
LL COOL J: Did she shock you with that? There-there is so much force - in that little package.
- (LAUGHTER) I am not shocked, I've never been shocked by you.
And I'm just so proud of you, babe, I really am.
Thank you, I love you.
Molly, you can have a seat in the VIP.
So the tone has been set, the lines have been drawn.
And these castmates are in it to win it.
Only thing I know for sure is that we're in for good time.
(SINGING) One way or another! This battle is gonna get even more fierce, obviously.
It's Lip Sync Battle, baby.
Lip Sync Battle, baby, Lip Sync Battle.
People killin', people dyin' Children hurt and you hear them cryin' - Yeah! - (CHEERS AND APPLAUSE) It takes two to make a thing Lip Sync Battle is back, and the cast of Younger is in the building.
And Nico Tortorella is here to let everybody know that the belt is leaving with them tonight.
Let's see what they did backstage to guarantee a victory.
INSTRUCTOR: Hey! Hi, Nico! Molly Bernard versus Nico Tortorella, it's good.
Have you worn heels before? You walked in like you wear them all the time.
What kind of question is that? (SQUEALING) I was checking! Yes, excuse me! I'm here to (BLEEP) win.
Honestly.
My greatest advantage over Molly would be the message of my second song.
It's about the deconstruction of divisions and binaries, and love, more than anything else.
Thank you all! - (DANCERS CLAP) - INSTRUCTOR: Thank you so much, Nico! Crew's comin' in hot.
We came in as a crew.
And we're gonna leave as a boo hoo, Molly Bernard, boo-hoo.
No-ah! Molly Bernard, you are going to lose! (CHEERING AND APPLAUSE) You You love it how I move you You love it how I touch you My one When all is said and done You'll believe God is a woman (GOD IS A WOMAN BY ARIANA GRANDE PLAYS) I don't wanna waste no time, yuh You ain't got a one-track mind, yuh Have it any way you like, yuh And I can tell that you know I know how I want it Oh And I can be all the things you told me not to be When you try to come for me, I keep on flourishing And he see the universe when I'm the company - It's all in me - Hey! Hey! You You love it how I move you You love it how I touch you My one When all is said and done You'll believe God is a woman (CHEERING) (SCREAMING) (SCREAMS) You You love it how I move you You love it how I touch you My one When all is said and done You'll believe God is a woman Yeah, yeah, God is a woman Yeah, yeah, God is a woman My one When all is said and done You'll believe God is a woman (SPOKEN) And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance And furious anger Those who attempt to poison and destroy my sisters (CHEERING AND APPLAUSE) CHRISSY: What?! Yes! (CHEERING AND APPLAUSE CONTINUES) CHRISSY: Oh, my God.
You guys, shout out to the incredibly gorgeous queens of Ru Paul's Drag Race that just graced us with their presence.
So, Chrissy, I mean that was remarkable.
That was crazy, - it had everything you could imagine.
- Dude.
I I'm dressed as a beaver, and I had the most incredibly gorgeous people around me, I I'm embarrassed and honored all at the same time.
You look great, sis, - you look great.
- CHRISSY: amazing.
LL COOL J: So, I want to give a big shout out - to the Say Love gospel choir.
- Yes! A choir that celebrates people of all kinds, - and a place where everyone is welcome.
- (CHEERING AND APPLAUSE) LL COOL J: Molly, were you blown away by Nico's performance? I am besotted, I-I you are so gorgeous.
I loved every single second of it! (CHEERING AND APPLAUSE) - LL COOL J: Nico.
- NICO: Yes, sir.
One word to describe, for the world, what you just did.
Non-binary.
(CHEERING AND APPLAUSE) LL COOL J: I'd vote for that.
Nico, you can head on over to the VIP.
They did a great job! Okay, God is definitely a woman, because she blessed us with this battle.
Absolutely, this one is special, and it's not gonna stop.
Come on back for more Lip Sync Battle, baby.
You You love it how I move you - Yeah! - (CHEERS AND APPLAUSE) It takes two to make a thing go right LSB is back, and Molly Bernard has her crack at winning the LSB belt.
Let's check her out, and see how she cooked up a performance that'll not only move the crowd, but swing 'em to her side, too.
MOLLY: Hi! MOLLY: Here at Lip Sync Battle, comin' in hot and feeling great.
I'm feeling ready to bring Nico downtown Charlie Brown.
- Yay! - You excited? I can't (BLEEP) wait.
I'm so excited, are you kidding? MOLLY: My main goal is to end my number with my (BLEEP) touching the floor.
Today feels like Broadway summer camp in the best way possible.
My dreams are coming true! Lip syncing is very hard.
My jaw, my TMJ, is acting up I'm gonna need a jaw massage tomorrow.
- INSTRUCTOR: Kick it! - MOLLY: Oh, (BLEEP).
It's (BLEEP) hard.
- MOLLY: Yay! We did it! - INSTRUCTOR: You did so good! It's happening! The character that I'm becoming is a very notorious, well-known lady.
The transformation hath happened.
I look just like my idol, my love.
The most darling woman.
Whoa! This is crazy! MOLLY: I am putting everything in this performance.
I am doing splits! I am getting lifted in the air.
We are doing a whole kickline, Rockettes style! I came to play and I came to slay.
Our friendship might break because of this show.
- Oh, it's not gonna break.
- I might If anything, it's gonna blossom.
Nico, I hope you do really good, but I think I'm still gonna win, I love you.
(CHEERING AND APPLAUSE) (DON'T RAIN ON MY PARADE BY BARBRA STREISAND PLAYS) Don't tell me not to live Just sit and putter Life's candy and the sun's A ball of butter Don't bring around a cloud To rain on my parade I'm gonna live and live now Get what I want, I know how One roll for the whole shebang One throw, that bell will go clang Eye on the target and wham One shot, one gun shot, and bam! Hey, Mister Arnstein Here I am! I'll march my band out I will beat my drum And if I'm fanned out Your turn at bat, sir At least I didn't fake it, hat, sir I guess I didn't make it Get ready for me, love 'Cause I'm a comer I simply gotta march, my heart's a drummer Nobody, no, nobody Is gonna Rain on my Parade (CHEERING) (CHEERING AND APPLAUSE CONTINUES) The split! (CHEERING AND APPLAUSE CONTINUES) - CHRISSY: If that isn't theater - Wow, Molly.
darling, I don't know what is! (CHEERING AND APPLAUSE) LL COOL J: Chrissy, how do you feel about that big, Broadway vibe that Molly brought.
You pack a punch! Notorious R.
B.
G.
CHRISSY: Ruth Bader Ginsburg, you did it! LL COOL J: Wow.
Well, first first of all, I want to shout it out to Barbra Streisand.
- You know what I mean? - Ohh! That was the first time ever we've done one of her many classics on LSB.
- Yes! - LL COOL J: Molly, what made you go with the Barbra Streisand classic? They don't make 'em like that anymore.
- And - CHRISSY: No, they do not.
like, this is such an incredible opportunity to, like, make your dreams come true.
And I'm not a singer, but I do kind of love to dance.
CHRISSY: Oh, honey, you are.
- You are! - MOLLY: It's so fun! You may not be a singer, but you're a performer.
- Thank you.
- You are a performer! So, Nico, what was it like seeing Molly handle her business, and get all litigious up here? (CHUCKLES) We brought the politics here today, family.
Yes you did.
I expect nothing less from you.
All right, Molly, you head on over to the VIP.
You know what I'm sayin'? Make some noise, everybody! So, they came, and they're leaving us as castmates.
But on this stage, Nico and Molly went at it.
Just when I thought I had seen it all, this battle took it to another level.
And I'm glad I don't have to decide who wins this incredible hardware that my partner's holding right here.
Yeah, I got this.
Somebody's parade is definitely gonna get rained on when we find out who gets to take home this fantastic hip gem.
'Cause there can only be one.
Way to crack, much? - It's LSB.
- I feel bad! BOTH: LSB, baby! Go far! I'll march my band out - Yeah! - (CHEERS AND APPLAUSE) It takes two to make a thing go right Welcome back to Lip Sync Battle.
Now, tonight, we had a mix of everything.
Statements, artistry, and laughs.
For that, we have to thank two extremely talented people, Molly Bernard, and Nico Tortorella.
LL COOL J: Chrissy, are you ready to do this? - Yes, baby! - LL COOL J: Are you ready?! (CHEERING AND APPLAUSE) Is the Lip Sync Battle champion Molly Bernard? (CHEERING AND APPLAUSE) LL COOL J: Or or is the Lip Sync Battle champ Nico Tortorella? (CHEERING AND APPLAUSE) LL COOL J: And the Lip Sync Battle champ is Nico Tortorella! (WILD CHEERING AND APPLAUSE) So, Nico (CHEERING AND APPLAUSE CONTINUES) LL COOL J: Nico congrats.
Now, you are the new Lip Sync Battle champion.
- Ahh! - What's it feel like to be the new, proud owner of that belt? About time! (CHEERING AND APPLAUSE) No, it feels so amazing! This is honestly such a dream come true.
Thank you everyone out here.
Thank you both, thank you, Molly Bernard.
I love you! LL COOL J: Well, a huge thanks to Nico Tortorella and Molly Bernard for being down with our Lip Sync crew.
And a big shout out to everybody in Lip Sync nation.
We see all the love you give us, and we send it right back to you.
One love from me, LL Cool J, and Chrissy Teigen.
And remember, whatever you do in life, "Knock 'em out the box, L.
Knock 'em out, L!" You You love it how I move you You love it how I touch you My one When all is said and done You'll believe God is a woman And I I feel it after midnight A feelin' that you can't fight My one It lingers when we're done