Lost In Space (1965) s03e20 Episode Script

Fugitives in Space

[ Horn Blowing ] [ Man Over P.
] Prison Quadrant Number 5: All inmates prepare for inspection.
Prison Quadrant Number 5: All inmates prepare for inspection.
Prison Quadrant Number 5: All inmates prepare for inspection.
[ Engine Revving ] [ Horn Blowing ] - [ Engine Revving ] - [ Weapon Whirring ] - Come on, Smith.
You're supposed to be helping.
- My presence here is help enough.
You know that my delicate back does not permit me to indulge in manual labor.
Well, you'd better indulge right now.
- Come on! - But I'm just at the funny part.
- Hurry up! - Oh, very well.
- Well, what is it? - Tap the pin while I hold this in place.
- With what? - The hammer.
- Where is it? - There! - Here? - There! - Smith, I oughta-- - It's not my fault.
I told you I was not well enough to do all this heavy work.
[ Gasps ] Major, you wouldn't strike an invalid! - Get out of here, Smith.
Just get out of my sight! - Splendid idea.
I'll go.
[ Screeches ] Major! Come quickly! - He's dead! I know he's dead! - Stop your wailing.
He's not dead.
He's-- He's probably had some kind of an accident.
From the look of him, he's had more than one accident.
You stay here.
I'll get the first aid kit from the Chariot.
- I'll be back in a few minutes! - Hurry! I don't relish the prospect of staying here alone with this terrible creature, dead or alive! - [ Screeches ] - One sound, and you're dead.
I-- I wouldn't dream of making a sound.
I'm a friend trying to help you.
A friend, do you understand? A good friend.
- How did you get here? - I don't know.
Last thing I remembered, I was running low on fuel, and then I stalled out and I crashed.
- You alone here in this freezing place? - There's just me and Major West.
He's gone to fetch you a first aid kit to help you.
- You see, we are friends.
- You really wanna be my friend you wouldn't let me stand here freezing to death! Here.
Let's trade.
Take it.
Take it.
It's yours.
Accept it as my gift.
Not even a "thank you" indeed.
Whatever has happened to good manners? This tacky material probably provides no warmth of any kind, but it's cold! I'd better put it on.
And I'm sure it's an abominable fit.
[ Grunts ] I do hope I don't run in to anybody that knows me.
[ Engine Revving, Vehicle Approaching ] [ Vehicle Screeching ] - That could be the one.
- Good afternoon, gentlemen.
- You arrived just in the nick of time.
- Don't move.
What is the meaning of this, sir? You don't want me.
You want that terrible fellow who just left with my nice, warm jacket, I might add.
He went that way.
- But I don't understand.
- You should know by now there's no escape from prison planet Destructon.
- Destructon? - The warden'll be pleased with us capturing an escaped convict.
No, no.
You're making a terrible mistake.
I'm innocent.
I never broke the law in my life.
Oh, please don't harm me! What are you doing? - Okay, okay.
You'd better let him go.
- Major, tell them who I am.
- Tell them I'm not an escaped prisoner.
- You look very natural, Smith.
- Don't let them take me away! - It's a great temptation, but I guess I'm stuck with you.
- You'd better let him go.
- Interfere and you'll be destroyed.
- [ Vehicle Screeching ] - [ Horn Blowing ] Stop! This isn't the escaped prisoner.
- Oh, thank heaven.
- But Warden-- - Thank you, Warden.
You came just in time.
- Yes.
It appears so.
Where is the prisoner that you helped to escape? - We didn't help any prisoner escape.
- Of course we didn't.
Then how is it your friend is wearing the jacket of the prison planet? He means the prison planet Destructon.
Oh, I see that you're familiar with my little establishment.
I mean, no.
Then you're aware that in helping a prisoner to escape that you have just violated section 42-B of the Intergalactic Penal Code? Look, we had no idea he was an escaped prisoner.
Ignorance of the law is no excuse.
Somebody must've helped him to escape.
I assure you, my dear sir, it was not I.
- He did it! I saw him! - Smith.
Then you were here? You were an eyewitness to the whole thing? - Oh, yes.
An eyewitness to the whole thing.
- And you did nothing about it? You see, I was so appalled at what was happening, I didn't quite know what to do.
But did you try to forcibly stop him? Oh, yes.
Yes, I did.
They threatened me.
- Why, you-- - [ Warden Yells ] You're aware, of course, that article 863-D of the Intergalactic Penal Code provides that it is a felony not to try to forcibly stop a person or persons engaged in aiding a prisoner! But Your Honor-- I mean, Mr.
Warden-- I did my best, truly I did.
You'll both be remanded to the Intergalactic Court for the Control of Criminal Procedure and tried for your crimes.
- We haven't committed any crimes.
- Don't try anything foolish.
It won't do you any good.
This is all your fault, Major.
I should have had better sense than to try to protect you! - March! - Warden, it's your responsibility to protect me! I said march! Don! Dr.
Smith! - What happened? - They're under arrest.
That's what happened.
- Under arrest? - Yes, William.
You must find your father immediately and tell him he must vouch for me as a character witness.
I can't do that, Dr.
Dad and the others are away at the radar station.
Character references are of no interest to me.
These men are charged with a very serious crime.
[ Scoffs ] Imagine trying to help a prisoner to escape.
- No one escapes my prison! - But I'm innocent, I tell you! Look.
Five hundred years of penal perfection.
and in the end, no one was successful.
[ Chuckles ] They don't call me the "warden's warden" for nothing.
But you just can't assume they're guilty-- even without a trial.
- That's uncivilized! - Oh, we're not uncivilized.
They'll have a trial.
Unshackle the prisoners.
An instant trial is all we'll have time for, but it will be fair under the circumstances.
[ Will ] Instant trial? [ High-frequency Tone ] Hear ye! Hear ye! The First Circuit Computer Control Court is now in session.
Judge 781, revised model 94-E presiding.
Good afternoon, Your Honor.
The prosecution awaits the pleasure of the court.
You know, I'll bet the Robot knows all about those kinds of computers.
We'll have you out of here in nothing flat.
- William, don't forget about me.
- I won't forget about you.
You can count on that, Smith.
Don't worry, Dr.
We'll get you out of here too.
Thank you, my dear boy.
I knew you wouldn't forget a friend in need.
Hey, Robot, come here.
Are you familiar with the statutes in the Intergalactic Penal Code? I have a complete knowledge of all the statutes in the penal code.
Intergalactic law was programmed into me during my first term at I.
- Robot, didn't you tell me that you majored in premed? - I did.
But I also majored in law.
I am a robot of many tapes.
You bumptious braggart! Don't just stand there.
Do something.
None of your tapes will do your friends any good.
When I get my hands on prisoners, they stay that way.
They are not prisoners yet.
There is the trial first.
A mere formality.
After a brief recess for lunch.
Robot, what have you heard about that kind of judge? It appears to be an alien 781 revised model 94-E.
They are said to be extremely tough judges sticklers for upholding the exact letter of the law.
Oh, sadness, oh, sorrow.
To be tried by a hanging computer.
- Isn't there anything we can do to help? - Perhaps.
If the escaped convict were to be found and returned to custody the judge might take a kinder view toward the charges against Dr.
Smith and the major.
Oh, please find him, my dear friend.
You cannot allow them to incarcerate me.
- Do you think you can do it? - I have not used my trail and detect tapes for some time.
Their servile mechanisms are quite rusty, but I will try.
And hurry.
Quick, Dr.
Give me that jacket.
Yes, here it is.
Here it is.
[ Mechanical Whirring ] My electronic scent analyzers have locked in on the alien.
I will now shift into automatic track and secure.
It is an unusually fine system, and one we can all be proud of.
It is an unusually fine system, and one we can all be proud of.
- [ Judge ] Is the prosecution ready? - Ready, Your Honor.
Is the defense ready? I guess so, Your Honor.
Proceed with the prosecution.
Your computer punch card is now ready.
[ Bell Dings, Computer Tabulates ] [ Judge ] The jury has digested the prosecution.
Proceed with the defense.
They're as good as convicted already.
[ Judge ] Is the defense ready? [ Bell Dings ] [ Bell Dings, Computer Tabulates ] Your Honor, the defense rests.
The prisoners will face the bench.
After a fair and impartial digital survey of all the evidence the members of the jury have reached a verdict and found you both guilty as charged.
Major, I'm going to faint.
Your Honor, there's been a serious miscarriage of justice here! Order! Order in the court! And now I will pass the sentence of this court.
Wait! [ Robot ] Your Honor, I have new evidence to present to the court: the escaped convict, who will tell exactly what happened.
Very well.
The court will hear this new evidence.
Please, my dear sir.
Tell them what happened.
My lips are sealed.
It's against the code of the underworld to sing.
Nobody's asking you to sing! Just tell them Zachary Smith is as innocent as a newborn babe.
- I'm not a squealer.
- [ Dr.
Smith ] But you must squeal! I beg of you, tell them the truth! That's the way it is, partner.
They caught us all fair and square.
The game's up with us, Smitty.
Take it like a man.
Sentence will now be passed.
You will both be taken to prison planet Destructon where you'll spend the rest of your life spans at hard labor.
- [ Gavel Bangs ] - Warden, take the prisoners in charge.
- Take him to the chain forge.
- Yes, Warden.
- Major, don't leave me.
- If I had a choice in the matter, I still would.
Now then.
Who is next? I'm afraid it's my turn, sir.
Yes, sirree.
Just as I thought.
A classic criminal profile.
But that's not my best side.
Warden, I must tell you.
I may have told some small falsehoods on special occasions and only when absolutely necessary, of course but basically, I'm a very good person, don't you think? I have been warden of this prison planet for 500 years and you're telling me I can't spot a criminal type when I see one? - No.
No, of course not.
- You are a criminal type.
If I say so, you are definitely one.
If you want to get along, rule number one is don't contradict the warden! - But I wasn't contradicting.
I was merely saying-- - You were saying I was mistaken and prisoners who say that end up in solitary confinement, do you understand? Yes.
- Now, as I was saying-- - You were saying that I'm definitely a classic criminal type.
And don't think that you're tough either.
I have ways of dealing with prisoners who think they are tough.
In fact, it's one of my many small pleasures.
- It is? - Oh, yes.
It wasn't easy for Destructon to get the reputation of being the toughest prison planet in the entire galaxy.
We worked very hard to get it.
We're working just as hard to keep it.
So you cause me any trouble at all, I'll make it so hard for you you'll be begging the guards to turn their ray guns on you! That won't be necessary, my dear sir.
I'm-- I'm not tough.
I'm very gentle.
I'm very kind.
You see, I've never been in a place like this before, and I'm frightened.
- You'll get used to it.
- I will? Oh, yes.
As a matter of fact, you'll have a whole lifetime to get used to it.
Oh, please believe me! Zachary Smith is innocent! Ask anybody! There is no more Zachary Smith.
You're only a prison number now.
- 756498273.
- [ Yelps ] Oh, this is the final ignominy.
I'm no longer me.
I'm a prison number.
Oh, thank heavens my friends and family will never know.
You're assigned to work and live in Quadrant 6.
One of the nicer quadrants, I trust, as befits my station.
As a matter of fact, it is the worst quadrant in the entire galaxy.
The temperature is over 150 degrees and the work in that quadrant is the hardest we have to offer.
My dear sir, I'm frightfully sorry about disagreeing with you.
Please don't go out of your way to make things difficult for me.
No, I won't.
You must remember that this is a prison planet.
You weren't sent here for a vacation! Take him away.
[ Gasps ] No.
Just a moment.
Warden, I would like to discuss with you the possibility of making me a prison trustee.
Take him away to the chain forge! - I'll join you all later in the viewing tube.
- No! [ Horn Blowing ] - [ Man Over P.
] Quadrant 6, prepare for new arrivals.
- [ Clanking ] Quadrant 6-- Quadrant 6, prepare for new arrivals.
Quadrant 6-- Quadrant 6, prepare for new arrivals.
[ Horn Blows ] It doesn't look too pleasant out there, but at least it's not as hot as you said it would be.
This viewing tube is kept at the same pleasant atmosphere as the administration buildings on the other side of the planet.
Outside is just as hot as I promised you.
[ Both Gasping ] It's unbearably hot.
How do you expect us to survive in this kind of temperature? I'm too young to die.
The computer court sentenced you two here for the rest of your lives.
It didn't say how long that would take.
I brought you some company.
Prisoner 756498002 meet prisoners 756498273 and 756498274.
Pleased to meet you, 273, 274.
Chain them up! Just a moment.
You can't just leave us here like this.
[ Whip Cracks ] - [ Whip Cracks ] - [ Horn Blows ] Ohh, as if it weren't bad enough to be imprisoned in this horrible place we have to live chained to this monster.
Oh, you don't wanna live chained to me, huh? Well, that can be easily arranged.
Oh, it's so hot.
I feel a splitting headache coming on.
- Oh, no, you don't! - [ Dr.
Smith Yelps ] Stop it.
Can't you understand we're all in this together? - Oh, that's hot! - [ Chuckles ] You got a pretty low threshold of pain tolerance, 274.
Everything here is hot! That's why they've sentenced us here to this living death.
That's all the more reason we've got to help each other out stick that much closer together-- just to stay alive.
Oh, it's so hot.
Everything is so hot.
We're doomed here.
How do they expect us to work in this heat? It's still early in the morning.
[ Chuckling ] - Wait until noon, when it really gets hot.
- Hotter than this? - That's impossible.
- Twice as hot.
And with that burning wind blowing into your face.
- And no shade, no place to hide from it.
- I want to go home.
As bad as it is, this is home, Smith.
That is, until Will can contact the others and they can figure a way to get us out of here.
If you're thinking of parole, forget it.
There are no paroles on Destructon.
How can you exist without hope? Who said anything about not having any hope? There's always hope for prisoners brave enough to try to escape.
Escape? What an interesting idea.
- You have a plan, of course? - I always have a plan.
- I should like to hear it.
- Nothing doing.
We're staying put making the best of it till we get out of here legally.
I told you to forget about paroles, forget about mercy.
- You're condemned here for life.
- Just-- Just how long have you been here? Or is it 283 years? - I forget sometimes.
- 282 years? I'll be an old man by then.
Major, you must get us out of this inferno! There's only one way.
We have to escape.
I'll lead you.
I've escaped hundreds of times already.
And you've been brought back hundreds of times already-- in chains.
But not this time because this time I have a fantastic plan! I've got friends on the outside who'll help me.
All we have to do is get to them, and they'll help us.
- Don't listen to him, Smith.
- [ Horn Blows ] - What was that? - [ Horn Continues Blowing ] Only the guard making his rounds.
[ Horn Blows ] [ Horn Blows ] [ Man Over P.
] Prisoners in Quadrant 6 your work quota is not registering on the master computer.
Remember: no work, no ice.
No work, no ice.
- Ice? - We work our fingers to the bone all day they send us a block of ice so at least we can sleep at night.
Work hard all day for an oversized ice cube? I won't do it.
Well, you'd better.
Tonight, when it's still blazing hot you'll wish you had that nice, cool ice to huddle around.
Well, back-to-work time.
"Pal Zachary.
Many happy returns.
" This is fun.
Patty cake, patty cake, baker's man bake me a cake as fast as you can.
Roll it and pat it and mark it with "S.
" Put it in the oven for Dr.
Smith and Major West.
[ Laughing ] Are you serious? Robot, how can you carry on as if nothing has happened when Don and Dr.
Smith are gonna spend the rest of their lives in prison? - That is not necessarily a true statement.
- What have you got here? I have been practicing some of the culinary arts that were programmed into me.
It is called a three-layer chocolate maple surprise.
I was going to make an angel food cake, but I did not think it appropriate for Dr.
Your computers must be out of whack.
How can you bake a cake at a time like this? These things do not concern you.
Now, I must find an appropriate box to put it in so that it can be delivered to Dr.
Smith and Major West.
Wait a minute.
I get you.
You've baked a hacksaw or a file in there, haven't you? That is an incorrect assumption.
Well, it's a nice cake, anyway.
I guess it'll be a big comfort to Don and Dr.
Smith to know we're thinking about them.
Whoo! That candle burns funny.
- Hurry! We must get out of here! - What? What happened? What? - Don't ask questions! Just get out of here! - What do you mean? - Don't ask questions! Just get out of here! - What do you mean? Boy, you weren't kidding when you said it was a chocolate maple surprise.
I took the liberty of baking some plastic explosives inside the cake.
I thought it would be of more help to them than a file or hacksaw.
Much lighter too.
It took less yeast to make it rise.
Robot, I'm ashamed of you.
I thought you were programmed for law and order.
I am, but I'm also programmed for justice and fair play.
Smith and the major have been falsely imprisoned.
It is only right that I do what I can for them until they can get a fair trial.
- You're right, and I'll help you.
- No, Will Robinson.
It is much too dangerous.
I will take the risk myself.
Robot, I only want to help.
We shall see, but first, I must bake another cake.
Perhaps an angel food cake this time.
After all, it is the thought that counts.
Now, where is my recipe? Oh, it's so cool, so nice and cool.
We're lucky we got this ice tonight.
We almost didn't make our work quota.
The work is too hard for me, and everything's so hot.
I'll never make it You don't look like you regenerate too well.
- Regenerate? - Well, I'm a Kaloron from the planet Zandor.
We Kalorons regenerate every time we get killed.
- Oh, dear.
How many times have you been-- - Killed? Uh, 11, maybe 12 times since I got here.
I lose track.
You're gonna be in big trouble here if you don't regenerate.
Unless you smarten up and come up in my escape plan, huh? And I told you nothing doing.
We're not gonna get in any more trouble by trying to escape.
Couple more days of this heat, and you'll be begging me to take you with me.
All right.
Knock it off.
Let's get some sleep.
And think cool.
We've got a tough day ahead of us tomorrow.
- I must think cool.
- You'll be beggin' me to take you with me.
Just wait.
You'll see.
You think it's hot now? Just wait till summer comes.
[ Whip Cracks ] - Come in.
- You wanted to see me, sir? Yes.
I've been going over your reports.
On the first set of rounds, Guard Number 10 reported that he saw the prisoners in Quadrant 6 just sitting and talking.
Yes, sir.
That's right.
But Creech seemed to be doing most of the talking.
The two new prisoners more or less just listened.
I knew it! They can't fool the greatest warden in the galaxy.
The time of imprisonment, when multiplied by the ratio of discontentment accelerates rapidly when divided by the degrees of heat.
They are already planning their escape.
But how can you be sure? Are you questioning me-- the greatest warden in the universe? Oh, no, sir.
Of course not.
Remember when those prisoners tried that mass escape in Quadrant 10, 83 years ago? Who anticipated their plans and was there, ready and waiting for them with armed guards? - You were, Warden.
- Right! And when I say now that the prisoners in Quadrant 6 are planning an escape who is right? - You are, Warden.
- Right! You know, I'm really correct in thinking I'm a truly marvelous warden.
To think my mother wanted me to be a dentist.
Yes, they're planning an escape.
But it'll be just too bad for them because we'll be there ready and waiting for them, right? - Right! - Wrong! You will be there waiting for them.
I'll be taking a dip in my swimming pool.
You know, I've been thinking perhaps an invisible molecular vaporizing field should be set up around Devil's Quadrant.
And in case they try to pass through it, zap! Three little piles of ashes.
And the warden's warden has done it again.
It has always been my experience that a man of gracious habits and self-esteem will always find a way to maintain his personal appearance.
I said to shut up.
And I'm sure I look lovely.
Last chance, Major.
You may have the razor if you'd like it.
[ Creech Laughs ] That's not a razor.
It's old Mordikon's pigsticker.
He slit three guards' throats with it before they vaporized him.
[ Grunts In Disgust ] [ Horn Blowing ] Back-to-work time.
Well, your turn now, old buddy.
But you're doing so nicely, old buddy smashing those big rocks with such strong, manly blows.
I was very impressed.
Please continue.
You're doing splendidly.
You take your choice.
You'd better start smashin' the rocks with this - or I'll start smashin' your head, huh? - [ Gasps ] No consideration for my weakened state.
How some ever, I shall do my share.
I will not have it said that I was shirking my responsibilities.
- [ Gasps ] - All right, Smith.
- It's all yours.
- Thank you I am sure.
Hit it harder.
I can't.
It burns my hands.
You'd better start breaking those rocks, because if you don't we won't make our work quota! And if that happens, we won't get our sleeping ice.
And if that happens, I'd hate to be you because that would make me very unhappy with you, old buddy! That's better.
[ Horn Blows ] Looks like some people have come to see you.
Major, they brought our pardon, I'm sure of it.
That's why they've come.
Don't you think? I sure do hope so, Smith.
Come on.
[ Creech ] Take it easy.
Take it easy.
It's too hot to move fast.
[ Robot ] Greetings, Dr.
Greetings, Major West.
Thank heavens you arrived.
I knew you'd arrange a pardon for us.
Smith, we're trying just as hard as we can.
We did bring you this birthday cake.
I'm burning up alive, and you bring me a cake, you potbellied prankster? - It's not my birthday! - You could pretend.
Oh, no.
I can't believe it.
We shall have to remain here in this furnace forever.
It doesn't feel so hot in here.
In fact, it's kind of chilly.
I know.
It's deliciously cold in there, but it's frightfully hot out here! [ Robot ] All right.
If you insist.
But I'm sure all my joints will get stiff.
I hope so.
Stop shivering, ninny.
That's the least you can do.
And may I remind you that if it weren't for your legal pretensions, I wouldn't be in this predicament.
Don't blame the Robot, Dr.
He tried his best.
We all tried.
And we'll never stop trying.
Even if it takes the rest of our lives.
Don't listen to him, Will.
I know you're trying your best.
Before we go can I give this to Prisoner 756498273? can I give this to Prisoner 756498273? It is just a little something to help brighten the lonely hours of incarceration.
Very tasty.
Chocolate maple surprise angel food cake.
Very unusual.
Thank you for the compliment.
It is an old family recipe.
- I'll let 273 have that cake on one condition.
- Whatever you say, sir.
Next visitors' day, bake one for me and the boys.
Oh, thank you, sir.
It would be an honor.
- Boy, it is hot out here.
- Here you are, Dr.
Be gone, you iron-born ingrate, and take that silly thing with you.
Take it.
Have a party.
It'll be a blast.
- Go, booby! - Dr.
Smith, listen to the Robot.
He's right.
It'll be a blast-- a real blast.
Blast me no blast, William.
Just leave me alone to bake in this oven.
I'd better just set it down over there.
I do not want to drop it after all the trouble I had to get it to rise.
Oops! I guess I put in too much yeast.
The warden's gonna hear all about this.
[ Grunts ] He won't be happy about it.
Get in.
[ Horn Blowing ] [ Horn Blowing ] That blithering bumpkin.
- Why didn't he tell us that cake was wired for a blast? - And it's gonna get worse.
Once the warden hears about this, he's gonna cut off our ice rations for sure.
- We have to try to escape now.
- Don't listen to him, Smith.
Even if we were able to get away from this place, we'd be escaped convicts on the run.
They'd surely find us and bring us back.
We'd be more than escaped prisoners.
I told ya.
We have friends and places to hide.
Because we'd be millionaires, that's why.
- [ Chuckles ] - Did you say millionaires? Yes.
What difference does that make to you? You're not interested in trying to escape.
On the contrary, my dear sir.
Do tell me more.
Well, I've got a fortune in deutronium waitin' for us out there waitin' with friends who'll hide us until the heat's off.
Oh, I mean until the authorities get tired of looking for us.
- [ Don ] Smith.
- [ Dr.
Smith ] What? We'll get out of this somehow.
Don't buy that story about escape and hidden billions.
He'll just get you in a worse jam than you're in now.
One does not sneeze at deutronium, Major, but, still, I don't know.
While you're thinkin', just think how nice it'll be to be somewhere nice and cool.
And with billions in deutronium to buy anything you want to make things even more pleasant.
- I'll do it.
I'll escape with you.
- Ha! Don't listen to him, Smith.
It's hopeless.
Are you dumb enough to stand in our way? Are you? Now you either come with us willingly, or we'll drag your dead body along after us.
Please don't be difficult, Major.
You must come with us, or he'll kill you.
And it's much too hot to be dragging you along after us.
Smith, you're all heart.
- You shouldn't have done that.
- There's entirely too much talk around here.
We gotta get outta here.
[ Horn Blows ] I am very upset about what my guards have told me about your attempt to help in an escape plot.
You and your friends must realize that escape is impossible.
- The prisoners are here for life.
- But it's not fair.
They're not guilty.
They were framed.
The computer court doesn't agree with your idea of innocence.
Besides, isn't the word "framed" too harsh a word? There is no other word.
My computers indicate they are innocent.
[ Chuckles ] You're correct.
Very plainly and very simply, your friends were framed.
Then what reason would there be for sending them to prison? Oh, no, no.
Not sending them to prison.
Having them escape from prison.
We need some valuable information from Creech the prisoner we had 'em locked up with.
Creech is a born escape artist.
He's tried it before, and he'll try it again.
And every time he does, we follow him, because we know sooner or later he will lead us to his accomplices and the great fortune in deutronium that they've got hidden away.
But you have no right to do that! You just can't use Don and Dr.
Smith like bait without getting their approval.
I have the right to do anything.
Here, I am in command! Here, what I say is right and what is wrong.
Now, if your friends can help us to solve one of the great unsolved crimes of the galaxy then that's just what they're going to do whether they like it or not.
That's all there is to it! Sir! Sir, we just got a report from the guard post in Quadrant 6.
The prisoners are missing from their assigned positions.
- Shall I sound the escape siren? - No.
There's no need for that.
Everything's going just as I planned.
- Have you picked up their trail yet? - Yes, sir.
- They're heading for Devil's Quadrant.
- [ Chuckles ] Beautiful.
Beautiful! Everything just as I planned.
- I love it! - [ Whip Cracks ] Let's go and watch.
Robot, we're gonna have to stop them.
We can't let Don and Dr.
Smith get vaporized.
We're gonna have to go after them.
Once again, my magnificent track and detect system will take over.
Come, Will Robinson.
I must have some water.
- It's just a little ways further.
- You've been saying that for hours.
He's using you, Smith.
There aren't any friends out there.
- And there's no fortune in deutronium.
- He's lyin'! There's billions in deutronium just waitin' for us! It's just a little bit further.
Now, you still with me, huh? I'm with you all the way to the bank.
[ Yells ] Why are you still standing there when all those billions await us? I'm standing here because I take one more step, I could be destroyed.
What do you mean destroyed? We're now entering a section separating Quadrant 6 from the Devil's Quadrant.
Rumor has it that it is mined with subatomic charges.
- One false step, and it could be instant vaporization.
- Oh, dear.
- Smith? - Yes? Get up as carefully as you can.
Don't let anything move! - [ Grunts ] What do I do now? - Now come back to us following in your own footprints.
- But I can't see them.
- I'll direct you.
- Your left foot first.
- Left.
Come back.
Don't let it down.
Right there.
- Back.
- Now your right foot.
Bring that back.
- I can't see.
- About 10 inches.
Right there.
- [ Yelps ] - Down.
Your left foot again.
Bring it back.
Further! - [ Yelps ] - Right there.
That's it.
Now, come back with your right foot.
Back further.
- Right there.
- I'm frightened.
I'm frightened.
- All the way.
All the way.
Now, back.
- [ Yelps ] Thank you.
I'm safe.
Oh, thank heavens.
Now we'll never know if there really were subatomic mines there.
You mean to say we're stopped here? There's no way to get at all those billions? Oh, sure, there's a way! Right through the minefield! As a student of modern penology, I would venture to say that there is no minefield at all out there.
They obviously know how scare rumors can be magnified in a prison community.
- What was that? - Just a scare rumor going up in smoke, Smith.
- What are we gonna do? - I'll tell you what we're gonna do.
We're goin' back right now.
I think I solved the problem of how to get through that minefield! When he comes to, I'll use him as a guinea pig to lead the way.
No, no.
I won't let you do that.
I mean, he won't let you do that.
Ooh, well, maybe you can just convince him.
- [ Growls ] - I can try.
Robot, we can't stop now.
We've gotta push on toward the Devil's Quadrant and hope we can find Don and Dr.
Smith there in time.
- What's the matter? - My sensors indicate concentrations of highly radioactive material beneath the ground ahead of us.
- What does that mean? - A minefield.
We're gonna have to pass through it fast if we're gonna catch up with them.
There is only one way.
Stay here.
I will try to detonate the mines and create a passage through the minefield.
- Can you do it? - If the subatomic explosive charges are under 10 alphatrons, my structure will withstand them.
If not, good-bye, Will Robinson.
Robot! That was an eight alphatron charge.
That was a six.
That was a nine! - Are you all right? - That was an 11.
3 perhaps even a 12.
- Can you keep going? - Affirmative.
My sensors also indicate that we have come to the end of the minefield.
If you could give me a push to start me [ Grunts ] we can be on our way.
[ Coughs ] I refuse to go another foot-- not another inch.
See? [ Chuckles ] I told you I'd get us there.
Right at the end of this canyon.
You are now entering Devil's Quadrant.
" [ Laughs ] All we have to do is walk the length of this canyon and we're home free! And we collect that fortune in deutronium.
Of course! That's waiting for us too.
Come on.
Don't listen to him, Smith.
If you go across that line, you'll be a hunted man-- You shouldn't have done that.
Are you hurt, Major? Ohh, good heavens, you are a wicked one.
There's nothing stopping us now.
Come on! But he's hurt.
I can't leave him here like this.
Last chance, Smith.
Are you coming with me or are you staying here? - But who's going to take care of him? - Well, look at it this way.
Who's gonna take care of those billions in deutronium? - Oh, dear.
- Get your feet up.
Get your feet up.
Hear, hear! Oh, dear.
Why can't things be simple and uncomplicated for me? Come on.
Make up your mind.
There's no more time.
Come on.
Let's go.
I can't.
I can't leave him here like this.
Have it your way.
So long, sucker.
Smith, no! No! Stop! - Smith, what happened? - What happened, indeed.
Your meddling, Major, cost me a fortune in deutronium.
That is what happened.
- Are you all right? - Yeah.
I guess so.
All right to go back to breaking rocks in Quadrant 6.
[ Horn Blows ] [ Dr.
Smith ] Oh, no.
I refuse to go back to that terrible place.
Who said anything about taking you back? After all, you're all heroes.
Knowing that Creech was going this way enabled my guards to capture his entire gang and the missing deutronium.
Prisoner 756498273 and 756498274 I have something for you.
Your complete pardon.
Prisoners' effects.
And thank you for a job well done.
Thank you, indeed.
That's hardly enough, considering all the agony we've endured.
Of course it's not enough.
Here you are.
Five silver pieces for you, 273, and for you, 274.
- Well, it's better than nothing.
- Oh, and a pair of new boots for each of you.
Now that we're old friends, you don't mind if I call you 273 and 274? And good luck on the outside world.
If we never meet again, it'll be much too soon.
Oh, and remember: If you can't make it on the outside the warden's warden has a warm place waiting for you.
[ Cackles ]