Love Life (2020) s01e07 Episode Script

Claudia Hoffman

[female narrator] Recently,
Darby had entered
an emotional relationship with herself
and a physical one
with a coder from an e-scooter startup.
Ezra had a good face and zero personality,
which suited her perfectly.
Um, I just need to stop
for a second. Sorry.
- Are you okay?
- Um
Most people tell me I'm good at that.
You are. It's very good.
I just feel like
something's just a little off
and I just wanna, like,
leave a little mystery, you know?
[exhales] So, um, I'm gonna
[softly] I'm gonna call you.
[Claudia] Darby, I'm so glad you called.
I've been cleaning out the house all day.
I've decided to do an emotional purge
and I need to know what you want me to do
about your Beanie Babies.
[Darby crying] Mom?
- Is everything okay?
- Yeah, everything's fine.
Um, I wanted to tell you
I'm about to have my appendix out.
Should I come out there?
No. Um [sniffles] No.
I'm with Sara. She's here.
[indistinct conversation]
Maybe. Yeah, if it's not too much.
Okay, I'll get there as soon as I can.
You're gonna be okay, okay? I love you.
Thanks. Um, I love you, Mom.
- Bye.
- Okay.
[newscaster] Welcome back, we're getting
live pictures of the White House.
Just moments ago,
President Trump made remarks
[Sara] It's 5:00 somewhere.
[squeals excitedly]
[Claudia] Oh, God.
[Sara] Everyone thought I was an idiot
because Jim wanted to lock it down
I want this chair
to live under those pictures.
[Sara] Okay.
I mean, marriage doesn't mean anything.
I was married to two babies
- masquerading as adults.
- Okay.
I mean, look at what happened
with, uh with Darby and Magnus.
[Sara] Oh, God.
[Claudia] What a disappointing asshole
he turned out to be.
- [Darby groans]
- [Claudia] Oh.
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
- I just need to pee.
- Okay, come here.
- Let me carry you. Carry you in.
- Mom. What are you doing? No, no, no.
- Aah. You're making it worse.
- Okay, calm down.
You can put some weight on, right?
- [Sara] Do you guys need help?
- [Darby] No.
[Claudia] Gonna go have a tinkle.
[Darby] All right, just let me
Sorry you had to come out here to help me.
Oh, I didn't have to, I wanted to.
And there's a big difference,
believe it or not.
One of my goals in therapy right now
is to try to be more present
with the people I love.
Shana is trying to get me to understand
relationships are exchanges, right?
I mean, you can't pour from an empty cup.
Sorry, I think I forgot how to pee.
Oh, you know what?
That's because of the anesthesia.
Same thing happened to me
after my hysterectomy.
Don't push or you'll rip
your stitches out like I did.
Oh, God.
I got this one wiry chin hair
and I swear, it grows back overnight.
- [urinating]
- [exhales]
Okay, honey, now I have to go.
Come on, hurry.
I gotta go, I gotta go.
- Okay.
- Come on.
- [exhales]
- Mom.
- Hey, can I steal some of this?
- Yeah, of course.
I have to go meet
this 17-year-old YouTube star
from Toronto named DJ Fuckboy.
The future of music is bleak, dude.
- You gonna come back after that?
- No, I can't.
I have this show in Hell's Kitchen.
So you're gonna
leave me alone with Claudia?
[whispers] I mean,
she's keeping it pretty even keel.
But I turn into, like, the most obnoxious
14-year-old version of myself
when we're alone.
Please stay and be a buffer.
She loves you,
so it's a win for everybody.
You should just be grateful
that she wants to be here for you.
I mean, I don't even know
where my mom lives.
I know.
She's afraid to call me
'cause she thinks the IRS is gonna
use the cell signal to track her down.
I'm sorry, I'll stop bitching.
No, it's okay.
I didn't meant to shame you.
I'm in a really weird mood.
I don't [sighs]
I think I fucked things up with Jim.
No, come on.
You can work it out. You should reach out.
I just really miss him a lot.
Yeah, I know.
Ugh. Okay, I gotta roll.
But I am gonna bum
some vitamins for the road.
Go for it.
I love you, Darby.
I love you too.
You can call me anytime.
Yeah, thanks. I'll see you.
Bye, queen.
Take care, Sara. What do I do?
- Yeah.
- Is that right?
- [Claudia] Yes!
- [Sara] Yes, queen.
[door closes]
- [Claudia] That Sara's a good friend.
- Mmm.
I wish I had a Sara.
How are you feeling?
- Are you hungry?
- Not really.
How about a peanut butter and jelly?
Honey, don't store your peanut butter
over the stove,
because the heat rises
and you can melt the plastic
in the jar, okay?
And that leaches toxins
straight into your brain.
Do you ever hear anything about Magnus?
I heard that he was living with this woman
three months after we split.
- [Claudia sighs in exasperation]
- Right?
That must've hurt
to have him move on so fast.
After he all but held you hostage
and took your best years.
At least with your dad, I got you.
It was two years. It's not a big deal.
Two important ones.
Well, I just I think you need
to just get back out there
and meet somebody new and have some fun.
I'm having fun.
I'm actually seeing this guy, Ezra.
Okay, come on and sit in here now
and take a look at this
feng shui project I've been working on.
- Let me help you.
- Oh, it's okay, Mom.
Honey, I came all this way.
Let me help you.
You can lean on me.
Looks great in here.
- Yeah?
- Mmm-hmm.
Do you like it?
What do you think of that table there?
- It's cool. It's really cool.
- Right? [chuckles softly]
[Darby groans softly]
Look at us.
Just a couple of divorcees. [chuckles]
It's kind of fun.
It reminds me
of the time we went to Big Bear
with your Girl Scout troop.
Remember what a good time we had?
When I got poison ivy?
Oh, you did not get poison ivy, Darby.
You got heat rash.
No, you said I had heat rash because you
didn't want to miss the horseback riding.
Because that was the only activity
you wanted to do.
You were scared of the ropes course,
didn't want to go in the lake.
That water did look funky.
Well, thanks for reminding me.
I had managed
to block it out of my memory completely.
You did? I thought you loved it.
I loved it. I felt so
bonded to you. You were glued to my hip.
That's nice.
I didn't know that.
Did I tell you that Grandma Janet
got propositioned by a trainer at Equinox?
Well, I mean, good for Grandma, right?
Well, that's what I said.
If my mother can
still attract male attention,
then what the hell's my excuse?
So look what I did.
Oh, my God, Mom, are you on Tinder?
Tinder's, like, kinda hardcore.
You don't have to have sex with
every person you meet on Tinder, Darby.
You can get a cup of coffee.
I I know that. I'm not
I know how a dating app works.
I'm not doing that.
Sorry, I'm gonna take a nap, I think.
I'm just tired.
Thank you for the thing
with the furniture, Mom.
Why don't you lay down on the couch
and we can catch up on The Voice?
Don't think I can keep my eyes open.
Okay, all right, well
well, I'll read, okay?
And you just, you just snuggle up.
Come on, we'll keep each other warm.
I won't make a peep.
- Come on.
- Okay.
There we go. And the blanket.
[whispering] Have you ever heard
of Brené Brown?
I'm reading her books
and they've really helped me
make sense of my divorce.
- I'm gonna leave them here for you.
- Okay.
She's a shame
and vulnerability researcher.
How cool is that?
[on recording] Hey, it's Jim.
Please leave me a message.
[automated voice] The mailbox is full and
cannot accept any messages at this time.
- Good-bye.
- God damn it.
- [cell phone clatters]
- Oh, no!
[vacuum cleaner whirring]
[whirring stops]
Good morning, sunshine.
Oh, honey, I'm so sorry.
Did I wake you up?
No, it's okay, I needed to get up anyway.
I have a lot of work to do.
Oh, well, I told my office, I said,
"Don't even think about
calling me while I'm here."
I haven't taken vacation in five years.
- Honey, is your heat on?
- Yeah, I was freezing.
Well, you need more meat on your bones.
- Okay. Ooh.
- [Darby hesitates]
All right, let's wrap you up
in this blanket here.
- Oh, no, I don't keep this blanket out.
- This is beautiful.
This was Magnus's.
I'm getting rid of this.
Roger that. [exhales]
Oh, goodness.
If you're sure that this
is something that you're not gonna want,
- I bet Hunter would love to have it.
- Mmm.
Have you spoken to Hunter recently?
He doesn't answer my texts.
Oh, my God.
I'm so relieved it's not just me.
[both chuckle]
I have been so worried about him
since he dropped out of NYU.
Right now, he's sleeping in a hammock
in some co-op in Bushmills or some place.
- Bushwick, Mom.
- Whatever.
He's just, you know, wasting
the most important years of his life
with a bunch of climate change
activist stoner bozos.
Mom, you can relax.
You're not on the clock.
Honey, you know I can't sit still.
Now, um, these pictures here,
are these keep or toss?
Oh, careful with those.
Those are prints for work.
Lola's coming by to take them.
You're gonna frame these?
What's wrong with them?
There's a lot of gratuitous nudity,
wouldn't you say?
Those are the selects for the show
I'm curating at Lola's gallery.
- Oh, what show?
- I told you about it.
I've been working on it for two months.
All the pieces are by
female-identifying photographers.
Yeah, I thought things were going so well
at that million-dollar teacup place.
They were.
I wanted more autonomy
and this is my first show.
This is kinda a big deal for me.
Oh, well, if you're happy, honey,
then I am happy for you.
Okay. You can be proud of me too,
'cause it's good.
No, I am proud.
Now, when you say, um, female-identifying,
does that include lesbians
and transsexuals?
Transgender women, yes.
And lesbians
are also women, so [chuckles]
Okay, what am I thinking of?
- I don't know.
- Yes, you do.
You know, like your dad's sister, Sherry.
- Butch?
- Yes, butch.
Okay, I'm gonna take a shower.
[sighs softly]
Uh, Lola, I think you were duped
by the Chelsea Market.
There's more hay in here than food.
[Lola chuckles]
- Cheers.
- Oh.
Darby here is on Schedule II narcotics,
so she won't be imbibing today.
That is some pharma knowledge
you got there, Claudia.
Any good mother who's raised teenagers
knows her xannies from her oxys.
Ruby's only four
and I'm already dreading her teen years.
Darby here was pretty good,
but everything was
the end of the world for her.
Well, she turned out fabulously.
I mean, she's got a great eye for art.
- She does, doesn't she?
- Mmm-hmm.
Darby was always my creative child.
Do we still feel good
about Azadeh's stuff?
[Lola] Yeah.
- I think they're very interesting.
- [Lola] Mmm-hmm.
Oh. Earlier you said it was gratuitous.
No, I [scoffs]
I was just kidding.
Darby, you are so sensitive.
Do you know that I used to do
some nude modeling in college?
Mom, I'm not sensitive. I'm stressed.
We have a show in a week
and everything
can't be about you right now.
I just need to focus.
I'll let you girls do your thing.
I'm gonna swing by the grocery.
There's a bodega on the corner.
Those places aren't sanitary.
I'm gonna go to Whole Foods.
They have one on "Hyooston."
Houston's kind of far, Mom.
[Claudia] Well, I need the exercise.
- Do you need directions?
- No, I take the Orange Line.
You're not the only one who knows
how to navigate a big city, Darby.
Lola, it was just wonderful to meet you.
It was great meeting you too, Claudia.
- Will you at least take my MetroCard?
- [door slams]
Sorry, she just makes me fucking crazy.
[narrator] Darby was not
a planned pregnancy.
Neither was Claudia.
Claudia's mother
had gotten pregnant at 16,
and despite the fact
that her boyfriend had urged her
to "just take care of it,"
their daughter Claudia
was born shortly thereafter.
The home was mostly filled with resentment
and by the time Claudia was ten years old,
her mother had moved into a private room
at the back of the house.
Little Claudia was mostly left
to fend for herself.
But she carried the longing for love
heavy in her body
and into her own
particular brand of mothering.
[breathing shakily]
- [breathing heavily] Um, I need help.
- Okay, what do you need help with?
Deep breaths. Just stay calm.
Where do you want to go?
[woman 1] Wasn't that supposed to be you?
[woman 2] It was supposed to be me.
He said that he had access.
He had special access and could guarantee
I'm gonna be able to get you something.
[R&B song playing on speakers]
Nicolette. Happy goddamn birthday.
Congrats on the big 3-0!
- [Nicolette] Sara.
- Hi.
Oh, wow. Hi. It's been a while.
[Sara] Yeah. Oh. I brought you a gift.
It's not wrapped, but you were
gonna unwrap it anyway, so I saved a tree.
Cool. Um
Can I get you a drink or something?
Yeah, a beer would be great. Or tequila.
Sure, yeah.
- Um, is there a place I can put my jacket?
- Uh
Sure, yeah.
Just, uh, on the bed in there is great.
Okay, cool.
I'm so sorry, I didn't invite her.
I have no idea what she's doing.
- Sara.
- Oh, my God, James. Hi!
- What are you doing here?
- I'm celebrating Nicolette's birthday.
Are you kidding? No, you're crashing it.
No, she invited me.
Please don't. Just don't do that.
Oh, my God. Fine.
You forgot to change
your Paperless Post password.
It's still SyracuseHoops420.
Okay, so you're stalking me right now?
Do you have any idea how insane that is?
Baby, I'm sorry.
I was trying to get in touch with you.
You haven't picked up my calls
or returned my texts.
- Yeah, because we broke up.
- I know, but
I've been thinking about it
and, I don't know,
I think that New Jersey could be cool.
Maybe we should have kids.
Jesus Christ.
Why are you doing this?
I'm being serious.
No, Sara, you don't want
to move to New Jersey.
Even if you did want to move there,
we're so far past that.
See, I don't think we are.
You're not getting it.
I'm sorry, you're not.
Look, come on, baby. I miss you a lot.
I think we could fix things.
I don't want to fix things.
Look, I've had a lot of time
to think about this, okay,
and it breaks my heart,
but we are on different paths right now.
Like, I'm looking to
embrace responsibility, okay?
And you want to set it on fire.
It doesn't mean anything to you.
Okay, well, you don't have
to be a dick, Jim.
We can still be fucking friends.
No, we can't.
Not right now.
Maybe later, I don't
I don't know.
Okay, whatever. I should go.
No, Sara, I'm sorry.
And, Jim, I did have an abortion
in college, so fuck you.
[door slams]
- [breathing heavily]
- What happened? What took you so long?
I went to Brooklyn.
You what?
Where'd those flowers come from?
Oh, Dad sent them. Wasn't that sweet?
What a hero.
Well, Mom, how did you end up in Brooklyn?
The train went the wrong way.
I had a panic attack
and I did not travel with my CBD
because I didn't know what the laws were.
- Why didn't you call me?
- Why are you mad at me?
I get to be mad at you.
If you hadn't been so ugly to me,
we could've gone together.
I'm recovering from surgery.
It's not my fault that you got lost.
You got lost because
you don't listen to anyone ever.
I dropped everything in my life
so that I could be here for you
because I know what it's like
to be alone and with nobody
when you're going through a terrible time.
If you want to be here for me,
you have to be here for me.
You can't come and make my life
harder than it already is.
How am I making your life harder?
Okay, let's just take some space, okay?
No, no, no, I get it.
I'm a terrible mother.
[Darby sighs in exasperation]
[narrator] Darby would never pick up
the books her mother left behind,
but if she had, she might have
read a passage that said
that narcissism,
when examined with compassion,
is a trait that comes
from not feeling special enough
to deserve love, belonging,
or a sense of purpose.
Oh, shit.
[cell phone ringing]
Hi, sweetie. How are you?
- [bag zipping up]
- [soft clattering]
Would you mind giving me
directions to Midtown?
- Mom.
- I need to get to the Hilton.
- Don't go to a hotel.
- It's already done.
I booked it with credit card points
and I can't get them back.
I am very sorry about yesterday.
I'm going through a lot.
Being with Magnus and divorcing Magnus
Well, you're living in a mausoleum.
And that doesn't help.
It's rent-stabilized, which is [sighs]
I'm really grateful
that you came out here to help me
and I want to enjoy
the rest of the time that we have
'cause I know that
we don't get to do this very often.
So maybe today, you know,
anything you want to do in the whole city,
let's just do it.
Oh, I know what we could do.
Hunter said he has a window
between 11:00 and 2:00
and I really wanted to get him a mattress.
You got it, Mom.
[Claudia] Okay, honey,
let's try the breathable topper.
You know you sleep so sweaty.
I could care less, Mom.
You can pick something out.
[Claudia] Okay, is it comfortable?
That's what I'm asking.
[Hunter farts]
Oh, Hunter! Come on.
[Hunter] You asked if it was comfortable.
A fart is not an answer.
You're making this very difficult.
Come on, let's go try
the extra firm, okay?
So you don't get sciatica like your dad,
although that's due to poor posture
and flabby muscle tone.
You should buy property in Bushwick.
You'd hate it now,
but it's gonna pop like Williamsburg.
I have no interest in living
in a possibly-developing neighborhood.
- I'll be the landlord.
- [laughs]
Use my college money for the down payment.
I am not buying my 20-year-old son
a party pad in Brooklyn. No, sir.
I don't know if you can
put sheets on this mattress.
[Hunter] Major opportunity.
That's all I'm gonna say.
[Claudia] Okay, all right.
If you see a link, then send it to me.
Dude, you okay?
- Darby, what's the matter?
- Um, nothing.
- Is it the meds?
- I don't know.
I just, um
Nobody ever bought me a mattress.
[sighs in exasperation] What in the world?
When did you need a mattress?
Like, when I first moved here.
I had to buy this
$80 IKEA mattress on layaway.
And haul it up from Red Hook on a ferry.
You can have my mattress, Darbs.
Thank you, that's not
It's not about the mattress.
I just I don't know.
Why can't you just connect with me?
What? I don't understand. I'm here.
I took a week off
to be here for you, Darby,
at a very inopportune time for me.
So you're here, but it's like
It's like you're not really here.
I feel like your audience.
Like I could be anybody.
- That's not true.
- Okay.
It's how I feel, though.
Can I just have my fucking feelings?
Well, what about my feelings?
Okay, I feel like
you don't ever want me around.
That's not true.
Well, you see, it cuts both ways, missy.
Okay, okay.
So maybe I have a wall up.
It's 'cause I feel like
I need to protect myself from you.
What does that even mean?
I don't know, I just
I feel like you're either criticizing me
or overwhelming me.
Because I don't know what to do.
I can't get in there
to even try to love you.
You shouldn't have to try. You're my mom.
It's not as easy as you think.
- You're gonna find out one day.
- Okay.
I'm not attacking you,
to make you feel like a bad person.
Know what?
It's like the Big Bear trip, right?
I thought we had this special moment.
And you didn't receive any of that.
it's 'cause I'm just waiting for you
to flip it on me somehow,
or take it away.
[softly] Oh, God.
Oh, Shana said that
that's a pattern of mine.
Because I don't trust anyone
to just stay with me.
She thinks I'm so afraid
of rejection
that I reject the other person first.
Mom, that makes me so sad.
I'm sad too.
And I'm so lonely.
My children have grown and left me,
my second husband divorced me
because he said that I was mean.
I swear, Darby, it's like you cross 50
and nobody even wants you.
I want you.
I've always wanted you.
I tried to be a good mother to you,
but I didn't have that kind
of connection with my mother.
So maybe I just didn't know how to do it.
Oh, Mom.
- Do you think I'm mean, Darby?
- No.
No, I don't think you're mean.
[Darby sniffles]
I think you're fucking crazy.
[both chuckle]
Well, I'm glad we're doing this now.
Me too.
I'm so proud of you, Darby.
And I'm so sorry
that you didn't know that.
You just amaze me.
You've grown into this brave,
resilient, independent woman.
- You make me look like I did a good job.
- Wow. [chuckles, sniffles]
I think the therapy's working out, Mom.
God, I hope so,
because Shana charges $190 a session.
She won't take insurance.
[Hunter] Hey, I think I found one.
It's bamboo, hypoallergenic,
Oeko-Tex certified.
- [Claudia] Comfy?
- [Hunter] Mmm-hmm.
[Claudia] Okay.
Let's try.
It is comfortable.
Shit, I want one.
It's pretty cush, right?
Nice try, buddy. It's $3,000.
[cell phone chimes]
Guess who just got a match?
Really? Let me see.
Mom, what are you doing on Tinder?
Oh, like I don't know
what you'll be doing on this bed.
I'm gonna keep looking.
Let me see.
He's cute.
He's like a less creepy Jack Nicholson.
You should write him back.
Oh, no. I don't know, Darby.
Look at his profile.
It says he's a Deadhead.
Mom, you cannot be that picky
if you want to find somebody nice.
Well, I don't know what to say.
Can I help?
Should I say
my first husband was a Deadhead?
[narrator] Love is alchemy, nebulous,
a life force unto itself.
The way a daughter experiences
the love of her mother
will forever color the lens
through which she gives and receives love
of all kinds.
That day was the beginning
of Darby seeing Claudia
for what she had to give
rather than what she didn't,
therein unlocking
an essential corner of her own heart.
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