Mighty Med (2013) s01e23 Episode Script

Are You Afraid of the Shark?

All right.
My shift is over.
I'm just going to punch out and head to the Domain.
Hey, Betsy, do you mind? Thank you.
Oliver, check it out! Ugh, pets are the worst.
They're so uncivilized.
Their idea of hygiene is licking themselves.
I'm sorry, what? Excuse me, sir, but the veterinary wing of Mighty Med is down the hall and ( Growling ) Don't get too close.
He bites.
Oliver, that's the canine superhero amicus, and his pet person Harold.
I'm great with humans.
Shake.
Good boy.
All right, guys, the waiting room is right through there.
Amicus: Harold, don't pull! Aww, that human is so cute.
He makes me miss my pet Dorenbosch back home.
Don't you guys just love pets? I do! I love pets a lot! No, you don't.
A minute ago you said That I love pets.
I must not have been loud enough, because I love pets! Did someone just say they love pets? Seriously, did someone just say that? Because I have earplugs in so I don't have to listen to Alan.
What? See? Barely heard that.
Oliver just said he loves pets.
Wonderful! Because tomorrow I have my annual review in New York with Dr.
Bridges, the head of the Mighty Med board, and I need someone to look after my pet dog while I'm gone.
I don't know That sounds like fun! It sure does! Perfect! Uncle Horace, why don't you ever ask me to help? I'm trustworthy.
I can do it.
I can! I can! I can! I love these things! Amicus: Harold, drop that chicken.
Bad boy.
Okay, go! Everyday's an adventure you never know by the looks on our face at the school when we enter leave class early, work at 3:30 hit the comic store, read up before the journey all these new issues and super powers if we didn't have to work we'd be here for hours everybody says that we shouldn't worry but have you ever seen superheroes on a gurney? Will we save the world today? You never know will we all be safe today? You never know will we fly away or stay? You never know but you know we mighty med team up and let's go! Save the people that save people after classes we flip the page and jump to action they call us normo nomally fantastic seeing superheroes that we only imagine this type of life you got to have fight put up your fist and fight for what's right never can tell what we see is out of sight do the same thing tomorrow that we did tonight will we save the world today? You never know will we all be safe today? You never know will we fly away or stay? You never know but you know we mighty med team up and let's go! I'm not leaving till Friday, but I want to introduce you to my pet dog now.
Why do you keep your dog in the aquatic research center? I don't have a pet dog.
I have a pet named Dawg.
He's a shark.
Oh, I can see how that might be confusing.
He's so cute! Oliver, don't you just love him? Oh, yeah.
Who's a relentless killing machine? You are! Now, Dawg is a rescue shark.
He's been through some tough times, so he'll only eat if he's hand fed.
Oliver, climb in and feed him these hands.
They're made of chicken, but they taste like sea lion.
You want me to go into the tank? Don't worry.
You'll be in this cage.
Now before I go, do either of you have any raw meat on you? No.
Why? Because I'm starving.
I skipped lunch.
Wallace, we've got a big problem.
I'm sorry, but whenever I climb down from the top bunk, I'm going to step on your pillow.
There's a ladder at the foot of the bed! But that's not what I'm talking about.
We better start making money, or else we're going out of business.
But the Domain is our link to Kaz and Oliver, and they're our link to Mighty Med.
So we got to figure out how to stop losing money hand over fist.
Hand over fist, what does that mean? I don't know.
Put out your hand.
Still no clue.
But I really like that saying.
Me too.
All right, everyone, listen up! From now on, things around here are gonna change.
Starting now, no one's allowed to read comic books or play video games without buying them first.
Yeah, what does this look like, a library? I don't know what a library looks like.
Well, from now on, no money, no comic books.
And no games.
No exceptions.
And no mayonnaise.
What, we're out of mayonnaise.
Well, when we finish something, what do we do? Together: We put it on the shopping list.
This stinks.
I love hanging out at the Domain, but I don't want to have to buy something every time I come here.
This is America.
My forefathers fought for the right to browse.
You have four fathers? I only have one, but my mom says he's half the man he used to be.
Speaking of fathers, that gives me an idea.
I think I might be able to solve your problem.
Hey, what's going on? Gus, you're not running for mayor again, are you? My dad bought the Domain and put me in charge.
And as part of the deal, Wallace and Clyde will continue to work here.
You're in charge? So I can do whatever I want? Even this? Because Wallace and Clyde specifically prohibited it.
Yup.
And some other things around here are going to change too, starting with this.
From now on, you're Wallace and you're Clyde.
That's easier to remember.
Horace is gone, and we finally get to shark-sit.
Yeah, it's like we're married, and we have a little one to look after.
So, you want to get out of here and go to the movies? Wow.
I thought you'd be a lot more affectionate.
Sorry.
So, snookums, you want to get out of here and go to the movies? Oh, affectionate towards the shark.
Here, Dawg! You want a treat? Who's the cutest little guppy? Oh, I dropped it.
Oliver, he's not supposed to eat so many treats.
I don't think a box of treats is going to hurt him.
He ate an iron cage, and quite possibly the guy in it.
You don't know that.
Let's see what's in them.
Watson and Crick's genetic formula.
Warning: Do not exceed one scoop per day.
Contains mutation-enhancing genetic material bio-engineered DNA.
Oh, now with more fiber.
I'm sure he's fine.
Hey, where is he? And why are there wet footprints from the tank all the way out the door? Oh, no.
Are you thinking what I'm thinking? That Dawg rapidly evolved into a man-shark I was gonna say we should dry the floor so nobody slips and falls.
I think we have bigger problems.
I still don't get it.
How did you get your dad to buy you the Domain? Because I asked him to, and I'm spoiled! And don't worry, the Domain will be exactly as it was before.
Except with more Chinese food.
What did you do? I've always dreamed of owning a Chinese restaurant.
You're not supposed to pursue your dreams.
Life is about making a series of cowardly compromises.
At least that's what it says on the throw pillow my mom made for me.
Welcome to the lo mein Domain.
Today's specials are sweet and super shrimp.
Egg drop-kick soup and ka-pow chicken.
Gus, you've completely changed everything about the Domain.
Except somehow, it smells less like Chinese food now.
I didn't change everything.
By the way, jackets are required now.
Luckily, I have this one for unsophisticated heathens like you.
I don't want a half comic book store, half Chinese restaurant.
But if I did, how is there not an appetizer called Tecton wontons? I mean, it's sitting right there.
We have got to do something about Gus.
We could crush him into a fine powder and drink him like a smoothie.
Is what a truly insane person would say.
Oh, okay.
I think I know how to get Gus to sell you guys back the Domain, and you'll make money on the deal.
We are listening.
Is what someone who's listening would say.
I'll just get a health inspector to come in here, and we'll make sure the restaurant violates the health codes, so it gets shut down.
I like the way he thinks, Wallace.
Actually, he's Clyde now.
Oh, right.
I like the way he thinks, Clyde.
You know what, it is easier to remember.
It is easier.
Okay.
The footprints lead this way.
Dawg must be around here somewhere.
Alan, what are you doing? I'm trying to make a perfect circle.
That's a triangle.
I said I'm trying! Since my Uncle Horace chose you to pet sit, I have more time for my hobbies, like circle-making, and playing the cello.
Horace, what are you doing back from New York? I met with Dr.
Bridges and showed her who's boss, and it turns out it's her.
She wants a tour of the hospital before she decides on my future here.
I have to say that I'm skeptical about your genetic research.
I don't have to say that I'm personally rooting for you to fail.
But I did say it.
Because I don't like you.
This is why you never date a co-worker.
It always ends badly, especially if you accidentally burned down her house.
Can I ask you a hypothetical question? What would happen if Dawg ate too much of that Watson and Crick's genetic formula stuff? Why do you ask? No reason, just making conversation.
Remind me never to invite you to a dinner party.
Don't touch me.
It's Dawg.
Look what you did to him.
It's not so bad.
I mean, he's already a doctor, so we must have done something right.
Wait.
Where did he get that doctor's coat? This is bad.
Dawg has evolved into a super-violent man-shark! We have to stop him before he attacks everybody in the hospital! Oh, he's just rough-housing.
Help! This guy with big scary teeth is trying to get me! What, the man-shark? No, the janitor.
I told him he has big scary teeth and now he hates me.
Alan, buddy, assume for a moment that, I don't know, Horace's shark is turned into, I don't know, a man-eating man-shark, which is, I don't know, on the loose in the hospital.
Do you think you could use your telekinesis to, I don't know, help us? I don't know.
I guess I could do that.
Great.
If I was stupid! Forget it! My Uncle Horace picked you to watch his shark, so watch it.
Alan, if news of this gets out, Dr.
Bridges will fire Horace.
And if Horace gets the boot, so do you.
Fine, I'll help you.
So, what's the plan? Well, I remember a comic book where a mutation was reversed by extracting DNA, rearranging the chromosomes and injecting it back into the mutant.
Okay, I'll use my telekinesis to scrape a DNA sample from Dawg's skin.
And I'll keep Dawg distracted.
Sharks are attracted to movement and contrasting colors.
Here.
Use this beach triangle.
Wow, you are really bad at shapes.
All right, that's the health inspector.
Just follow my lead.
Oh, heavens, is that a health inspector? Whatever is he doing here? Don't worry, we will serve him as healthfully as possible.
I believe new Clyde is right.
I'll be right back.
If there's one thing I learned by running for mayor, it's corruption in politics.
That explains how you got 230,000 votes.
Hello and welcome to the lo mein Domain.
Would you please get this man a bowl of hot and sour soup? I will indeed.
Let's make sure it's not too hot first.
It's definitely a little too hot.
Okay, take this away and get this man a bowl of lukewarm and sour soup.
Here we go.
And allow me.
Mmm-mmm-mmm.
That is good.
Here, you taste.
Hey, excuse me.
Yeah, my food is way under-cooked.
Oh, I think it's coming back up! Whatever you do, don't order the chow fun.
It says it's fun But it isn't.
I've seen enough.
This restaurant is in violation of code section 117 unsanitary environment.
Oh, no.
So, we're shut down? What? Not at all.
You wouldn't believe what it takes to shut down a place.
Dung.
Mountains of it.
But these dusty comic books are way too close to the food.
You'll have to remove them all.
What are you doing? I heard you're supposed to give a health inspector a bride.
I think you mean a bribe.
Oh.
You can go back to your wedding now.
I got it! Dawg, no! Drop it Drop it Do something! Well, I guess we're stuck with the lo mein Domain forever.
At least that's what my fortune cookie says.
These are oddly specific fortunes.
Gus, why are you leaving? My dad is shutting down the place.
He says we're not making any money.
How is that possible? The restaurant's been packed ever since you opened.
I don't know what I'm doing wrong.
I've been buying all my Chinese food from the best Chinese restaurant in town, and then selling it at half the price to attract more customers.
So you've been losing money on every sale? First he takes our store and then he takes our business strategy.
Wait.
What if we were to buy the Domain back off you for 5,000 less than what your father paid? Fine.
But only because my fortune told me I should.
Wow.
These are oddly specific fortunes.
But as part of the deal, we get to read comics and play games for free again.
And I still want privileges to that executive bathroom.
Again, the cauldron of Krepulan is not a bathroom.
But you got yourself a deal.
Have we ever cleaned that? No.
Okay, we should be safe in here, until we can think of a way out of this.
Aww, he misses us.
What is wrong with you? Not all pets are adorable.
He's going to get in! I've got to get that door fixed.
It sticks a little.
And now, Dr.
Bridges, I'll show you my most prized possession, my pet shark, Dawg.
Um he's not in there.
Where is he? Right there.
He looks different.
Not to me.
Fascinating.
My ninth favorite sweater vest! Alan, use your powers! Oh, right! Okay, I'm safe.
You're on your own.
We've got to stop him! Just don't hurt Dawg.
Better him than Dr.
Bridges! Eh Maybe he's just hungry.
Try giving him a treat.
That's it, the treats! We don't need him to de-evolve, we need him to super-evolve! Hey, Dawg.
Shark-sitting you has been a real Treat.
Together: Seriously? What the heavens? A shark-skin suit? How positively gauche.
Now pardon me, but I have to floss.
I seem to have something stuck in my teeth.
Or someone.
Don't touch me.
Dr.
Diaz, despite almost killing me, I have to say that I am impressed with your achievement in genetics.
I don't have to say that I'm sad I'll have to wait another year to try to fire you.
But I did say it.
Because I don't like you.
Uncle Horace, this never would have happened if you would have left me in charge.
I know.
And thank goodness I didn't.
Because this is splendid! What? I've been trying to evolve Dawg into a man-shark for years! And you did it in one day! But couldn't you have waited five more minutes until after he'd swallowed my boss? I hate Bridges! Wow, the janitor does have big, scary teeth.
I told you an entire story about a man-shark, and that's what you took away from it? Anyway, after going through all this with Skylar, I realized something.
She and I have no future together.
I mean, she loves pets, I do not love pets.
You love her, she does not love you.
My point is, she and I are better off as just friends, and I'm totally over her.
There you are.
Oliver, I'm sorry for being so hard on you.
You were amazing the way you saved Dawg and us.
Thank you.
I love her so much.

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