Phineas and Ferb s05e09 Episode Script
Klimpaloon Ultimatum
1 There's a hundred and four days of summer vacation and school comes along just to end it So the annual problem for our generation is finding a good way to spend it Like maybe Building a rocket, or fighting a mummy or climbing up the Eiffel Tower Discovering something that doesn't exist Hey! Or giving a monkey a shower Surfing tidal waves Creating nano-bots or locating Frankenstein's brain It's over here! Finding a dodo bird, painting a continent Or driving our sister insane Phineas! As you can see, there's a whole lot of stuff to do before school starts this fall Come on, Perry.
So stick with us, 'cause Phineas and Ferb are gonna do it all! So stick with us, 'cause Phineas and Ferb are gonna do it all! Mom, Phineas and Ferb are making a title sequence! Okay, Stace.
Let's try again.
No! It's really more in the cheeks.
Like this - Nyang, nyang, nyang! - Oh, I give up! It's a good thing you won that contest to perform back up with Love Händel.
Yes, in the ballad of Klimpaloon, I will be playing Klimpaloon.
- Check out my klimpy style.
- Girl, I have already cashed that cheque.
And I don't even know what that means! Girl talk! Honey, the limo's here to take us to the award show.
- Be right there! I gotta go.
- You go, girl! Let's never speak of this again.
- Come on, boys, time to go! - You guys look great! Well, Lindana and Max Modem have to look their best - when presenting our category, don't we? - What's you got there? This is the first journal of the famous explorer, Sir Alvin Shackleberg.
He was the first person to sight Klimpaloon, the magical old-timey bathing suit that lives in the Himalayas.
We got this to help Candace research her "Nyang, nyang, nyangs" - for the Ballad of Klimpaloon.
- How marvelous.
It reminds me Sorry, dad, there's no time for that now.
We gotta go while I'm still in the zone.
- Nyang, nyang, nyang, nyang.
- She's good.
It's like Klimpaloon was right here in the room with us.
Whoa! Sweet limo! Ferb, I know what we're gonna do tomorrow.
How do we do it? Hey, where's Perry? Ah, Agent P.
I see you got the memo.
It's transcendental meditation week.
Namaste.
Doofenshmirtz has been spotted Carl, enough with the drumming! Sorry, sir, I just, sort of, got into a groove.
Anyway, Doofenshmirtz has been spotted as a seat filler at the 4th Annual 24-hour Tri-State Area Music Awards.
As you know, Doof's brother, Roger, is emceeing the event.
We're not sure what Doof's up to, but we need you to suss it out.
That's the that's the cloud.
Good luck, Agent P.
Live from Random stadium: Random Swimwear presents 4th Annual 24-hour Tri-State Area Music Awards.
The Tristies! Sponsored by Random Swimwear.
Be wet, arbitrarily.
Tonight's musical guests include Love Händel, Slamm Hammer, Tiny Cowboy, 2 Guys in the Parque, Danny and the Jay-tones, the Paisley Sideburn Brothers, Marty the Rabbit Boy and his musical blender, and many, many more.
Seriously, many more, 'cause it's it's 24 hours.
Please welcome your host and lovable Mayor, Roger Doofenshmirtz! We've got a lot of great music for you tonight, and a lot of other music.
So let's get things started, shall we? Please welcome to the stage our presenters for the fact-based song category, the girl who just wants to have fun and the guy who, I guess, wants fun to have him.
Lindana and Max Modem! Yeah! Go Mom! Go Dad! Yeah! Just go, just go.
I'll fix it later.
- Our first nominee for - the fact-based song category is, Slamm Hammer with their hit Trees are made of wood.
Wooow! Trees are made of wood! - Oh! - The second nominee in fact base song category - Excuse me.
Pardon me.
- The Hockey Hooligans with Hockey Z-9.
Excuse me.
Excuse me, pardon me.
# oh, yeah # Excusez-moi.
Con permiso, por favor.
# Don't turn away I'm talking to you, sir # Aha! Perry the platypus! Your timing is incredible! And by that I mean completely credible! But you've found yourself in a hairy situation.
Because of the trap, which is a wig.
Stop me if you've already made the connection.
Anyway, you're just in time for my latest inator! Behold! I know what you're thinking, and no, I did not invent a spray bottle, Perry the platypus, But just stay with me through my backstory, all right? You see, I was reading the Danville city charter, again, when I learned an interesting fact.
Back in 18-aught-5, Danville actually elected a warthog as mayor.
The public was fed up with the previous administration and thought, "hey, what's the worst that could happen?" Nepotism, that's what.
He filled the cabinet with his uncles and brothers and distant cousins.
And all of city hall was full of swine! Except for one chair that they kept empty so, you know, it wouldn't be so conspicuous.
So, it was decided never to allow another warthog to be in a position of authority.
Perry the platypus, are you texting? While I'm monologuing? You know, I'm just gonna hold on to this until I'm done 'cause I can get your full attention.
Anyway, I'm thinking, "nepotism, city hall, my brother Roger," And suddenly I knew what to do.
Turn my brother into a warthog! So, through the use of pseudo-technology I created this elixir, that, when sprayed on an individual, actually transforms them into a warthog! What? I said "pseudo.
" Anyway, once I collected enough elixir, I put it in this, my warthog-sprayer-inator! See? There's a method to my lameness! I'm gonna find out when Roger's on stage and then I'm gonna turn him into a warthog in front of everybody! That will remove him from power because of the aforementioned warthog nepotism act.
But, you know, the embarrassment's just a it's a cherry on top.
Right thos way Mr.
Mayor.
Now's my chance! Peace out, Perry the platypus! Love Händel with Candace Flynn! You're on in five! Omg! Omg! Omg! Omg I guess, just introduce the next act.
The last nominee in the fact-based category, the ballad of Klimpaloon sung by Love Händel Who are joined by contest winner Candace Flynn! Go, Candace! Stop! I object! This song does not belong in the fact-based song category! Klimpaloon is not real! What? My nana told me stories - about Klimpaloon! - Well, that's not good enough.
Seeing is believing.
And no one has ever seen Klimpaloon! Um, excuse me, but I have seen him.
That's right! You tell him, Candace! I'm afraid that's not good enough either.
Ladies and gentlemen, Mittington Random! Thank you, Max, uh, whoever.
Mittington Random here, sponsor of the show and president of Random Swimwear.
You're welocme.
According to the rules, if fact based song is called in the question, physical proof must be presented here within 24 hours.
- How are we supposed to do that? - Well, actually, you can't.
- Wait, what? - Oh, Daniel.
The rules clearly state that the band along with the presenters are to be locked in a sound-proof booth for 24 hours or until evidence is provided, whichever comes first.
- Wait a minute.
Why presenters? - I can't hear you 'cause you're supposed to be in the sound-proof booth, - so move along.
- Oh, okay.
Candace! You're in charge! Okay, sorry for the inconvenience, folks.
But it looks like we're gonna have to move this category to the end of the show.
Phineas, Ferb! We need to find Klimpaloon and bring him back within 24 hours.
We're way ahead of you.
Ferb's rounding up the gang.
Those darn kids! I'll stop at nothing to make sure they don't prove the existence of Klimpaloon.
Nothing! You're on next, Mr.
Mayor, after - the pork-based world music act.
- Now's my chance! No! Oh, Perry the platypus! Swine Flute! You're on! Where's your tambourine player? No show, man! Look at you, Perry the rasta warthogipus! Kid, you've got the goods! And now, here's Swine Flute! More tambourine, man! Isn't anyone gonna talk about how we got here so fast? Sorry, Buford, we don't have the time for that right now.
- Ferb? - Two words, travel montage.
I got two words for you, cli-ché.
Oh, yeah.
Anyone else get the feeling we're being followed? - No, not a bit.
- Paranoid! Okay, Ferb, where to next? - That's it? - We lost the auction for volume two.
- We've got sniped.
- What about that cave - up there with waving Klimpaloon totem? - If Buford is now the brains of this operation, my life has lost all meaning.
Watch it.
Long underwear makes the best wedgies.
Candace, make the sound! Nyang, nyang, nyang, nyang! - Nyang, nyang, nyang, nyang! - Whoa! - It's him! - Klimpaloon! Yay! - We found him! - Wish I could un-see that.
- Got him! - Mr.
Random? This unforeseen plot twist is brought to you by Random Swimwear! Wow! I totally thought that shadowy figure was gonna be Slamm Hammer.
Welcome back to the Tristies.
Our next category And then the hobo gave it back to me, quixotically.
And that was the day before we met.
So the next day at breakfast, I ordered poached eggs with salmon.
But I didn't have poached eggs with salmon.
I wonder how the boys are doing.
- Get us down from here! - Uh, that really doesn't align with my plans, so not gonna happen.
Look, if you're going to destroy my chance at stardom, I think I deserve an explanation.
All right.
I do like the sound of my own voice.
So, for years now, I've wanted to find the elusive Klimpaloon.
And finally, after countless hours web surfing, I found Shackleberg's journal on an online auction site only to lose the first volume to you two! I did manage to get his second journal, but it only contains the last page of the map, the map that you have in volume one.
So I concocted a long, convoluted plan to get you to lead me right to him.
Huh? Hmm.
Yeah.
- But why? - You see, sales have gone flat.
You can only reinvent the bikini and board shorts so many times.
But if I could convince the world to start wearing old-timey bathing suits again, that's revolutionary! But to do that, I was gonna need a gimmick.
- Nyang, nyang, nyang! - What a combo! He's self-propelled, he's got a weird, disturbing face on his chest, and he makes unintelligible noises.
Seriously, just the whole package is irresistible! And he's all mine! He's all mine! - You can't own him.
- He's a living thing! - He belongs to the ages.
- Well, the ages should have kept their receipt, because he belongs to me now.
And once I unravel his secrets, I'll make a fortune.
Ah, there's my ride.
Brought to you by Random Swimwear! We can't let him unravel Klimpaloon's secrets! Unravel? I've got this! Knot untying patch, check! - Come on! We've got to save him! - But how? Mr.
Random is already miles away.
We have no idea where he is going and no way to get there - except on foot! - Wow, what is with all the negativity? Enough already.
Time is running out and I am not going to blow my big break.
Let's look around.
Maybe we can find some clues.
See? Now that's constructive.
Look! It's one of Klimpaloon's threads, and it's trying to find its way back to him! - Follow that thread! - We cannot follow a thread! Again with the negativity.
Maybe we can use it as a homing device.
Ferb? Let's go! Is no one going to talk about where we got the snowboards? There's no time for that now! Come on! Come on! Come on! Oh, man! Roger's not on until the end of the show? - Can I get mics to him? - No.
Who do you think you are? - I'm his brother.
- Nepotism will get you nowhere with me.
Yeah, well, maybe not yet, but wait till Roger's a warthog.
I do not know what that means.
That must be Mr.
Random's fortress.
Follow me! - Now what? - Okay.
I'll just create a diversion here so that Buford and Baljeet can flank them from the left.
Ferb can then use his intimidating shout to scatter them so that Isabella can come in from behind.
That should work unless they have reinforcements.
What do you think, Baljeet? Can you give me - a number crunch real quick? - Uh, give me a sec.
I am coming up with a 32.
3% chance of success.
- Well, we've seen worse.
- All right guys, let's do this.
Buford van Stomm! - He just ran in.
- Let's go! Let's go! Let's go! - Dang it, Buford! - Stick to the plan, man.
Stick to the plan! What the What? I used gamer strategy.
Okay, now I just have to set the spritzer, and the timer, and whoop, there he is! My brother the warthog, mayor no more.
You know, it's not the same without Perry the platypus.
I can't believe he ditched me! One lousy award and he goes all diva.
What the heck is all this? That's just so wrong.
They're just horrible! You'll have to excuse me if this device seems incredibly threatening.
It's only because it is incredibly threatening.
Klimpaloon! As you clearly saw, my previous attempts to create the future of swimwear without Klimpaloon just were not working.
You fiend! Look, I'm giving "old-timey" here a new twist.
Flash back to fashion forward.
It's a little high concept, but take a look.
We're flashing back to fashion forward yes, the old is the new new one size fits all with just a little stretching be you 6'4" or 5'2" why rely on inspiration when the old stuff's tried and true we just revamped a tired idea and made a new old-timey swimsuit for you - Pretty catchy, don't ya think? - Yeah, if by "catchy" you mean "sucks the life out of the room and makes me wanna puke," then yeah.
Anywho, now that I have the original, I can figure out what makes him tick.
Which brings us back, obviously, to the incredibly threatening machine.
So, it's time to extract Klimpaloon's life force, And, uh, then, of course, infuse it into my latest swimwear line.
- We have to do something! - How about this? Aw, come on! Did we blow the breaker again, Fred? Fred? Frederick, it's That stings.
Come on, guys! Now's our chance to free Klimpaloon - Buford van Stomm! - Oh no, not again.
- So I did it again.
- So what do we do? Save Klimpaloon, of course.
- Nyang, nyang, nyang.
- There he is! Follow his voice.
- Got him! - Ow! That is me! Whoops.
My bad.
That wedgie was unintentional.
I got him! Let's go! Guards! Don't let him escape! Oh, they are too fast.
We are never going to make it.
Ok, we gotta split up.
Ferb, hide Klimpaloon under your jacket to keep him quiet and I'll lure the guards the other way with my "nyang, nyang, nyang-ing.
" - Just get him to awards show.
- But Candace, you'll miss your big chance to Saving Klimpaloon is more important.
Now go! Nyang, nyang, nyang All right, hold on.
That way! Follow that vintage swimwear! Good thing they left the door open.
Nyang, nyang, nyang, nyang Oh! Cold! Cold! Cold! Great, I'm reduced to yak transport.
Got it, boss.
It's go time.
and that's how we met.
Okay, folks.
On stage in five.
- Righty-ho.
- Wow.
What a great story.
Bobbi! Come on! Huh? What? Wait up, guys! And now to present our final award for the evening, which of course was supposed to be our first award, but you remember that whole "does Klimpaloon exist" hullabaloo.
Anyway, welcome again Lindana and Max Modem! Unfortunately, due to lack of evidence, it appears that love händel has been disqualified.
So without further ado, the winner of the award for best fact-based song is Wait! We have the evidence! I'm sorry, kids.
The journal isn't good enough.
You need actual, physical proof.
But we do have physical proof.
Ferb? Nyang, nyang, nyang, nyang.
I thought you said you'd stop at nothing to keep them from finding Klimpaloon.
That's right.
I did nothing and stopped.
- How did you find him? - And why are you all in parkas? There's no time for that now! Mr.
Random is a ruthless venture capitalist who captured all of us in his Himalayan fortress where he performed inhuman experiments on bathing suits and tried to steal Klimpaloon in pursuit of a revolutionary swimsuit sales gimmick! Oh, Candace, not here.
Not now.
No, Mom, really, Candace is telling the truth! What an active imagination these kids have.
We don't really have time for that now.
We need to present an award.
No, no, let's get the award done.
Tick, tick, tick, time's a-wasting.
Shall we? Well, obviously Klimpaloon is real.
So it gives me great pleasure to present the award for best fact-based song to Love Händel, for the Ballad of Klimpaloon! Thank you.
Thank you so much! And a big thank you to all of the kids who brought Klimpaloon here.
Come on, Candace, take your place.
Oh! oh! oh! he stands in winter he's striped and frozen he is completely out of style he got no hands he got no feet all mouth and teeth but he don't smile he's made out of wool he's itchy to wear he's got broad stripes and savoir-faire he's out of place almost everywhere since 1883 he's a costume out of time both ridiculous and sublime seems innocuous, but I'm afraid he's scaring me he's the magical old-timey bathing suit that lives in the Himalayas they call him Klimpaloon Klimpaloon if you're between Tibet and Nepal and you're quiet and you can hear the call of Klimpaloon Klimpaloon Nyang, nyang, nyang, nyang, nyang, nyang, nyang he stands in winter! Wow! He really is magical.
Actually, he's being pulled up by a cable.
Thanks, Miguel.
- Let's hear it for Love Händel.
- Look at them, enjoying them tryin'! "Ooh, we're so happy.
We saved Klimpaloon.
Let's all sing.
" Well, enjoy it now, because I will get my hands on Klimpaloon! I'll unravel his secret even if I have to rip him apart, stitch by stitch.
And then the moronic people of the world will beat a path to my door and beg for my cheap Klimpaloon knock-off line 'cause consumers are just like Lemmings, mrainless little animals that I can manipulate right off the fiscal cliff like the puppet master I am! Uh, uh, um - Was that thing on? - Yes! Yes, it was! - My career's over, isn't it? - Yes! Yes, it is! And I'm a warthog.
Curse you, Perry the Well, I guess he doesn't really get credit for this one, he was just playing tambourine with Swine Flute.
It's not really Well.
- Sort of anticlimactic for me.
- So where is Klimpy? Don't tell me he ditched us for one of those swanky after-parties.
I guess he's on his way back to the Himalayas.
- See you, Klimpy.
- Safe travels! I don't want him to go.
I want him to stay with us.
Klimpaloon doesn't belong to us.
He belongs to the ages.
I said that back in the Himalayas! Does no one listen to me? Uh, how are we getting home? We're flashing back to fashion forward yes, the old is the new new one size fits all with just a little stretching be you 6'4" or 5'2" why rely on inspiration when the old stuff's tried and true we just revamped a tired idea and made a new old-timey swimsuit for you Pretty catchy, don't ya think?
So stick with us, 'cause Phineas and Ferb are gonna do it all! So stick with us, 'cause Phineas and Ferb are gonna do it all! Mom, Phineas and Ferb are making a title sequence! Okay, Stace.
Let's try again.
No! It's really more in the cheeks.
Like this - Nyang, nyang, nyang! - Oh, I give up! It's a good thing you won that contest to perform back up with Love Händel.
Yes, in the ballad of Klimpaloon, I will be playing Klimpaloon.
- Check out my klimpy style.
- Girl, I have already cashed that cheque.
And I don't even know what that means! Girl talk! Honey, the limo's here to take us to the award show.
- Be right there! I gotta go.
- You go, girl! Let's never speak of this again.
- Come on, boys, time to go! - You guys look great! Well, Lindana and Max Modem have to look their best - when presenting our category, don't we? - What's you got there? This is the first journal of the famous explorer, Sir Alvin Shackleberg.
He was the first person to sight Klimpaloon, the magical old-timey bathing suit that lives in the Himalayas.
We got this to help Candace research her "Nyang, nyang, nyangs" - for the Ballad of Klimpaloon.
- How marvelous.
It reminds me Sorry, dad, there's no time for that now.
We gotta go while I'm still in the zone.
- Nyang, nyang, nyang, nyang.
- She's good.
It's like Klimpaloon was right here in the room with us.
Whoa! Sweet limo! Ferb, I know what we're gonna do tomorrow.
How do we do it? Hey, where's Perry? Ah, Agent P.
I see you got the memo.
It's transcendental meditation week.
Namaste.
Doofenshmirtz has been spotted Carl, enough with the drumming! Sorry, sir, I just, sort of, got into a groove.
Anyway, Doofenshmirtz has been spotted as a seat filler at the 4th Annual 24-hour Tri-State Area Music Awards.
As you know, Doof's brother, Roger, is emceeing the event.
We're not sure what Doof's up to, but we need you to suss it out.
That's the that's the cloud.
Good luck, Agent P.
Live from Random stadium: Random Swimwear presents 4th Annual 24-hour Tri-State Area Music Awards.
The Tristies! Sponsored by Random Swimwear.
Be wet, arbitrarily.
Tonight's musical guests include Love Händel, Slamm Hammer, Tiny Cowboy, 2 Guys in the Parque, Danny and the Jay-tones, the Paisley Sideburn Brothers, Marty the Rabbit Boy and his musical blender, and many, many more.
Seriously, many more, 'cause it's it's 24 hours.
Please welcome your host and lovable Mayor, Roger Doofenshmirtz! We've got a lot of great music for you tonight, and a lot of other music.
So let's get things started, shall we? Please welcome to the stage our presenters for the fact-based song category, the girl who just wants to have fun and the guy who, I guess, wants fun to have him.
Lindana and Max Modem! Yeah! Go Mom! Go Dad! Yeah! Just go, just go.
I'll fix it later.
- Our first nominee for - the fact-based song category is, Slamm Hammer with their hit Trees are made of wood.
Wooow! Trees are made of wood! - Oh! - The second nominee in fact base song category - Excuse me.
Pardon me.
- The Hockey Hooligans with Hockey Z-9.
Excuse me.
Excuse me, pardon me.
# oh, yeah # Excusez-moi.
Con permiso, por favor.
# Don't turn away I'm talking to you, sir # Aha! Perry the platypus! Your timing is incredible! And by that I mean completely credible! But you've found yourself in a hairy situation.
Because of the trap, which is a wig.
Stop me if you've already made the connection.
Anyway, you're just in time for my latest inator! Behold! I know what you're thinking, and no, I did not invent a spray bottle, Perry the platypus, But just stay with me through my backstory, all right? You see, I was reading the Danville city charter, again, when I learned an interesting fact.
Back in 18-aught-5, Danville actually elected a warthog as mayor.
The public was fed up with the previous administration and thought, "hey, what's the worst that could happen?" Nepotism, that's what.
He filled the cabinet with his uncles and brothers and distant cousins.
And all of city hall was full of swine! Except for one chair that they kept empty so, you know, it wouldn't be so conspicuous.
So, it was decided never to allow another warthog to be in a position of authority.
Perry the platypus, are you texting? While I'm monologuing? You know, I'm just gonna hold on to this until I'm done 'cause I can get your full attention.
Anyway, I'm thinking, "nepotism, city hall, my brother Roger," And suddenly I knew what to do.
Turn my brother into a warthog! So, through the use of pseudo-technology I created this elixir, that, when sprayed on an individual, actually transforms them into a warthog! What? I said "pseudo.
" Anyway, once I collected enough elixir, I put it in this, my warthog-sprayer-inator! See? There's a method to my lameness! I'm gonna find out when Roger's on stage and then I'm gonna turn him into a warthog in front of everybody! That will remove him from power because of the aforementioned warthog nepotism act.
But, you know, the embarrassment's just a it's a cherry on top.
Right thos way Mr.
Mayor.
Now's my chance! Peace out, Perry the platypus! Love Händel with Candace Flynn! You're on in five! Omg! Omg! Omg! Omg I guess, just introduce the next act.
The last nominee in the fact-based category, the ballad of Klimpaloon sung by Love Händel Who are joined by contest winner Candace Flynn! Go, Candace! Stop! I object! This song does not belong in the fact-based song category! Klimpaloon is not real! What? My nana told me stories - about Klimpaloon! - Well, that's not good enough.
Seeing is believing.
And no one has ever seen Klimpaloon! Um, excuse me, but I have seen him.
That's right! You tell him, Candace! I'm afraid that's not good enough either.
Ladies and gentlemen, Mittington Random! Thank you, Max, uh, whoever.
Mittington Random here, sponsor of the show and president of Random Swimwear.
You're welocme.
According to the rules, if fact based song is called in the question, physical proof must be presented here within 24 hours.
- How are we supposed to do that? - Well, actually, you can't.
- Wait, what? - Oh, Daniel.
The rules clearly state that the band along with the presenters are to be locked in a sound-proof booth for 24 hours or until evidence is provided, whichever comes first.
- Wait a minute.
Why presenters? - I can't hear you 'cause you're supposed to be in the sound-proof booth, - so move along.
- Oh, okay.
Candace! You're in charge! Okay, sorry for the inconvenience, folks.
But it looks like we're gonna have to move this category to the end of the show.
Phineas, Ferb! We need to find Klimpaloon and bring him back within 24 hours.
We're way ahead of you.
Ferb's rounding up the gang.
Those darn kids! I'll stop at nothing to make sure they don't prove the existence of Klimpaloon.
Nothing! You're on next, Mr.
Mayor, after - the pork-based world music act.
- Now's my chance! No! Oh, Perry the platypus! Swine Flute! You're on! Where's your tambourine player? No show, man! Look at you, Perry the rasta warthogipus! Kid, you've got the goods! And now, here's Swine Flute! More tambourine, man! Isn't anyone gonna talk about how we got here so fast? Sorry, Buford, we don't have the time for that right now.
- Ferb? - Two words, travel montage.
I got two words for you, cli-ché.
Oh, yeah.
Anyone else get the feeling we're being followed? - No, not a bit.
- Paranoid! Okay, Ferb, where to next? - That's it? - We lost the auction for volume two.
- We've got sniped.
- What about that cave - up there with waving Klimpaloon totem? - If Buford is now the brains of this operation, my life has lost all meaning.
Watch it.
Long underwear makes the best wedgies.
Candace, make the sound! Nyang, nyang, nyang, nyang! - Nyang, nyang, nyang, nyang! - Whoa! - It's him! - Klimpaloon! Yay! - We found him! - Wish I could un-see that.
- Got him! - Mr.
Random? This unforeseen plot twist is brought to you by Random Swimwear! Wow! I totally thought that shadowy figure was gonna be Slamm Hammer.
Welcome back to the Tristies.
Our next category And then the hobo gave it back to me, quixotically.
And that was the day before we met.
So the next day at breakfast, I ordered poached eggs with salmon.
But I didn't have poached eggs with salmon.
I wonder how the boys are doing.
- Get us down from here! - Uh, that really doesn't align with my plans, so not gonna happen.
Look, if you're going to destroy my chance at stardom, I think I deserve an explanation.
All right.
I do like the sound of my own voice.
So, for years now, I've wanted to find the elusive Klimpaloon.
And finally, after countless hours web surfing, I found Shackleberg's journal on an online auction site only to lose the first volume to you two! I did manage to get his second journal, but it only contains the last page of the map, the map that you have in volume one.
So I concocted a long, convoluted plan to get you to lead me right to him.
Huh? Hmm.
Yeah.
- But why? - You see, sales have gone flat.
You can only reinvent the bikini and board shorts so many times.
But if I could convince the world to start wearing old-timey bathing suits again, that's revolutionary! But to do that, I was gonna need a gimmick.
- Nyang, nyang, nyang! - What a combo! He's self-propelled, he's got a weird, disturbing face on his chest, and he makes unintelligible noises.
Seriously, just the whole package is irresistible! And he's all mine! He's all mine! - You can't own him.
- He's a living thing! - He belongs to the ages.
- Well, the ages should have kept their receipt, because he belongs to me now.
And once I unravel his secrets, I'll make a fortune.
Ah, there's my ride.
Brought to you by Random Swimwear! We can't let him unravel Klimpaloon's secrets! Unravel? I've got this! Knot untying patch, check! - Come on! We've got to save him! - But how? Mr.
Random is already miles away.
We have no idea where he is going and no way to get there - except on foot! - Wow, what is with all the negativity? Enough already.
Time is running out and I am not going to blow my big break.
Let's look around.
Maybe we can find some clues.
See? Now that's constructive.
Look! It's one of Klimpaloon's threads, and it's trying to find its way back to him! - Follow that thread! - We cannot follow a thread! Again with the negativity.
Maybe we can use it as a homing device.
Ferb? Let's go! Is no one going to talk about where we got the snowboards? There's no time for that now! Come on! Come on! Come on! Oh, man! Roger's not on until the end of the show? - Can I get mics to him? - No.
Who do you think you are? - I'm his brother.
- Nepotism will get you nowhere with me.
Yeah, well, maybe not yet, but wait till Roger's a warthog.
I do not know what that means.
That must be Mr.
Random's fortress.
Follow me! - Now what? - Okay.
I'll just create a diversion here so that Buford and Baljeet can flank them from the left.
Ferb can then use his intimidating shout to scatter them so that Isabella can come in from behind.
That should work unless they have reinforcements.
What do you think, Baljeet? Can you give me - a number crunch real quick? - Uh, give me a sec.
I am coming up with a 32.
3% chance of success.
- Well, we've seen worse.
- All right guys, let's do this.
Buford van Stomm! - He just ran in.
- Let's go! Let's go! Let's go! - Dang it, Buford! - Stick to the plan, man.
Stick to the plan! What the What? I used gamer strategy.
Okay, now I just have to set the spritzer, and the timer, and whoop, there he is! My brother the warthog, mayor no more.
You know, it's not the same without Perry the platypus.
I can't believe he ditched me! One lousy award and he goes all diva.
What the heck is all this? That's just so wrong.
They're just horrible! You'll have to excuse me if this device seems incredibly threatening.
It's only because it is incredibly threatening.
Klimpaloon! As you clearly saw, my previous attempts to create the future of swimwear without Klimpaloon just were not working.
You fiend! Look, I'm giving "old-timey" here a new twist.
Flash back to fashion forward.
It's a little high concept, but take a look.
We're flashing back to fashion forward yes, the old is the new new one size fits all with just a little stretching be you 6'4" or 5'2" why rely on inspiration when the old stuff's tried and true we just revamped a tired idea and made a new old-timey swimsuit for you - Pretty catchy, don't ya think? - Yeah, if by "catchy" you mean "sucks the life out of the room and makes me wanna puke," then yeah.
Anywho, now that I have the original, I can figure out what makes him tick.
Which brings us back, obviously, to the incredibly threatening machine.
So, it's time to extract Klimpaloon's life force, And, uh, then, of course, infuse it into my latest swimwear line.
- We have to do something! - How about this? Aw, come on! Did we blow the breaker again, Fred? Fred? Frederick, it's That stings.
Come on, guys! Now's our chance to free Klimpaloon - Buford van Stomm! - Oh no, not again.
- So I did it again.
- So what do we do? Save Klimpaloon, of course.
- Nyang, nyang, nyang.
- There he is! Follow his voice.
- Got him! - Ow! That is me! Whoops.
My bad.
That wedgie was unintentional.
I got him! Let's go! Guards! Don't let him escape! Oh, they are too fast.
We are never going to make it.
Ok, we gotta split up.
Ferb, hide Klimpaloon under your jacket to keep him quiet and I'll lure the guards the other way with my "nyang, nyang, nyang-ing.
" - Just get him to awards show.
- But Candace, you'll miss your big chance to Saving Klimpaloon is more important.
Now go! Nyang, nyang, nyang All right, hold on.
That way! Follow that vintage swimwear! Good thing they left the door open.
Nyang, nyang, nyang, nyang Oh! Cold! Cold! Cold! Great, I'm reduced to yak transport.
Got it, boss.
It's go time.
and that's how we met.
Okay, folks.
On stage in five.
- Righty-ho.
- Wow.
What a great story.
Bobbi! Come on! Huh? What? Wait up, guys! And now to present our final award for the evening, which of course was supposed to be our first award, but you remember that whole "does Klimpaloon exist" hullabaloo.
Anyway, welcome again Lindana and Max Modem! Unfortunately, due to lack of evidence, it appears that love händel has been disqualified.
So without further ado, the winner of the award for best fact-based song is Wait! We have the evidence! I'm sorry, kids.
The journal isn't good enough.
You need actual, physical proof.
But we do have physical proof.
Ferb? Nyang, nyang, nyang, nyang.
I thought you said you'd stop at nothing to keep them from finding Klimpaloon.
That's right.
I did nothing and stopped.
- How did you find him? - And why are you all in parkas? There's no time for that now! Mr.
Random is a ruthless venture capitalist who captured all of us in his Himalayan fortress where he performed inhuman experiments on bathing suits and tried to steal Klimpaloon in pursuit of a revolutionary swimsuit sales gimmick! Oh, Candace, not here.
Not now.
No, Mom, really, Candace is telling the truth! What an active imagination these kids have.
We don't really have time for that now.
We need to present an award.
No, no, let's get the award done.
Tick, tick, tick, time's a-wasting.
Shall we? Well, obviously Klimpaloon is real.
So it gives me great pleasure to present the award for best fact-based song to Love Händel, for the Ballad of Klimpaloon! Thank you.
Thank you so much! And a big thank you to all of the kids who brought Klimpaloon here.
Come on, Candace, take your place.
Oh! oh! oh! he stands in winter he's striped and frozen he is completely out of style he got no hands he got no feet all mouth and teeth but he don't smile he's made out of wool he's itchy to wear he's got broad stripes and savoir-faire he's out of place almost everywhere since 1883 he's a costume out of time both ridiculous and sublime seems innocuous, but I'm afraid he's scaring me he's the magical old-timey bathing suit that lives in the Himalayas they call him Klimpaloon Klimpaloon if you're between Tibet and Nepal and you're quiet and you can hear the call of Klimpaloon Klimpaloon Nyang, nyang, nyang, nyang, nyang, nyang, nyang he stands in winter! Wow! He really is magical.
Actually, he's being pulled up by a cable.
Thanks, Miguel.
- Let's hear it for Love Händel.
- Look at them, enjoying them tryin'! "Ooh, we're so happy.
We saved Klimpaloon.
Let's all sing.
" Well, enjoy it now, because I will get my hands on Klimpaloon! I'll unravel his secret even if I have to rip him apart, stitch by stitch.
And then the moronic people of the world will beat a path to my door and beg for my cheap Klimpaloon knock-off line 'cause consumers are just like Lemmings, mrainless little animals that I can manipulate right off the fiscal cliff like the puppet master I am! Uh, uh, um - Was that thing on? - Yes! Yes, it was! - My career's over, isn't it? - Yes! Yes, it is! And I'm a warthog.
Curse you, Perry the Well, I guess he doesn't really get credit for this one, he was just playing tambourine with Swine Flute.
It's not really Well.
- Sort of anticlimactic for me.
- So where is Klimpy? Don't tell me he ditched us for one of those swanky after-parties.
I guess he's on his way back to the Himalayas.
- See you, Klimpy.
- Safe travels! I don't want him to go.
I want him to stay with us.
Klimpaloon doesn't belong to us.
He belongs to the ages.
I said that back in the Himalayas! Does no one listen to me? Uh, how are we getting home? We're flashing back to fashion forward yes, the old is the new new one size fits all with just a little stretching be you 6'4" or 5'2" why rely on inspiration when the old stuff's tried and true we just revamped a tired idea and made a new old-timey swimsuit for you Pretty catchy, don't ya think?