Remington Steele (1982) s01e15 Episode Script

To Stop a Steele

- I got a will problem.
- A will problem, eh? Yeah.
I'm gonna need one if you don't help me.
Morrie Singer, small-time thief, pulls a small-time job and comes up with a big-time jewel.
It's all right then, uh, keeping Mr.
Steele out of it? Well, if you twist our arms.
Well, then what the hell.
Laura, I was wondering The thief is none other than your client.
Laura, it's Morrie Singer in that Charger.
He hired us to find the thief who hired you.
- Where's fourth gear? - It's there someplace.
- Just keep shaking the stick.
- [Groans] [Man] Ohh, boy.
! [Laura And Steele] We have to talk.
Of course.
[Both] You first.
- If he didn't do it - And Harrod didn't do it Then it must be someone we don't work for.
Gentlemen, this is a robbery.
[Laura] Try this for a deep, dark secret The great detective Remington Steele? He doesn't exist.
I invented him.
Follow I always loved excitement.
So I studied and apprenticed and put my name on an office.
But absolutely nobody knocked down my door.
A female private investigator seemed so feminine.
So I invented a superior.
A decidedly masculine superior.
Suddenly, there were cases around the block.
It was working like a charm.
Until the day he walked in with his blue eyes and mysterious past.
And before I knew it he assumed Remington Steele's identity.
Now I do the work, and he takes the bows.
It's a dangerous way to live but as long as people buy it I can get thejob done.
We never mix business with pleasure.
Well, almost never.
I don't even know his real name.
- [Water Running] - That's, uh, some wedding.
- What wedding is that? - The Blaustein affair? Down in the Coral Room? It is getting wild.
[Chuckles] The bride's sister took off all her clothes.
She's dancing naked on the bandstand.
- Naked? - Yeah.
- Really naked? - Yeah.
- You sure? - Am I sure? Am I sure? Listen, when you get to be my age, you know naked.
You don't care, but you know.
[Grunts] [Grunts, Mutters] Ah, Louis, Frank.
Good.
Good.
[Grunts] Yeah.
This is it.
In the box, Louis.
The alarm circuit.
Frank gets the ohmmeter.
Now, the color-coding for the trip levers is, uh Go take a nap.
Beats the hell out of feeding pigeons all day, huh, old man? - Frank.
How you doing, Frank? - A few minutes.
Care to do the honors? - Make me smile.
- Save some for the rest of us.
- Oh, dear God.
- Empty.
Everything.
Empty.
- What gives, old man? - Oh, dear God.
You'd never know you were robbed last night.
We moved over inventory from our other stores this morning.
Anything to keep this under wraps.
[Sighs] Someone had to know.
I mean, who would figure we'd be keeping a 60-carat, flawless "D" stone worth two million dollars in a cockamamy jewelry outlet? Aplace like this, we're here to sell "guilt'"jewelry.
Baubles a man can take home to his wife in Minneapolis after he's had a little fun on his business trip in L.
A.
- So you think it was an inside job? - I don't know what to think.
I'm not supposed to have a rock like that in the store.
The insurance company finds out about it, I'm canceled.
Out of business.
I need that diamond back in 48 hours.
- Why the deadline? - The Persian prince who bought the thing is arriving in two days.
He's already paid cash for the purchase, and I've already spent most of the cash.
The commodity market took an unexpected downturn.
I see your problem.
The country where this guy comes from you steal a loaf of bread, they chop off your head.
For two million dollars, I'd be willing to bet they won't even sharpen the blade.
You will explain to Mr.
Steele? I mean, I want the best, that's why I called his agency.
It's just that, well, you know wherever your boss goes, publicity seems to follow and, uh, publicity is one thing I'm not anxious to generate right now.
You have our word of honor, Mr.
Harrod.
None of this will leak out to the media, or to anyone else.
It's all right then, keeping Mr.
Steele out of it? Well, if you twist our arms.
- I wanna see Mr.
Metal.
- Remington Steele? - Isn't that what I said? - I'm afraid he has Good morning, Miss Wolfe.
- Oh, Mr.
Steele? - Yes.
Morrie Singer.
I got a will problem.
- A will problem, eh? - Yeah, I'm gonna need one if you don't help me.
Could you hold my calls, Miss Wolfe? This way, Mr.
Singer.
- Thank you.
- Right.
Uh, please.
You know anything about theft? Professional theft? I've read a few books on the subject.
I've been a thief all my life.
Not proud of it.
Just is.
Quit a few years ago, but already the damage was done.
I got a son in Tampa.
Russell.
He's got a son.
My grandson.
I never saw him.
Russell won't let me.
So I got this idea.
Maybe if I move to Tampa, I could make things straight with Russell.
I don't wanna die alone, Mr.
Steele.
- No, no.
None of us do.
- But a move like that costs money, and l eh.
But, about three weeks ago, a score fell into my lap.
From out of the blue.
A gift from the gods.
Only the score was hit before we got there.
Perhaps the gods were telling you the straight and narrow was the surest path to Tampa.
Maybe.
Maybe.
Only I'm an independent, you know.
I'm not connected, if you know what I mean.
I mean, you just don't go into a place and rob it.
You gotta get permission from the people who run the territory.
- In return for - Twenty percent of the take.
- And 20%% of nothing is - A hole in the head.
Mr.
Steele, I figure the only chance I got is to find those people who beat me to that score.
Or I go to Tampa in a box.
Mr.
Singer, I will personally turn over every rock in this city - to find the thieves that pulled that heist.
- Mr.
Steele I will rally the forces of my detective agency.
I will shout your innocence from every rooftop in [Muffled] - I don't think that's a good idea.
- Mmm? All the rallying and rock turning and shouting.
It seems like it's gonna call a lot of attention to things.
Don't you think? - Mm-hmm.
- Me too.
And seeing as how there are people who want to kill me attention is something we want to avoid.
- Don't you think? - Mm-hmm.
Me too.
So, what do you say we make this our little secret, huh? And no staff.
No rooftops.
Just you and me.
My very thoughts, Mr.
Singer.
So how are you gonna do it? First we'll get the names and addresses of all employees, past and present.
- It was obviously an inside job.
- No, no, no.
I mean, how are you gonna tell the ever-helpful Mr.
Steele that he's persona non grata on this one? Just tell him? Laura, you tell that guy he can't be part of something and sure as he talks funny, he's gonna wanna be a part of it.
For all his shortcomings, he cares about the well-being of the agency as much as we do.
Once I explain the situation, he'll respond in a mature, rational Laura, I'm warning you.
No, I'm begging you.
Don't do it.
Uh, Miss Wolfe, as I shall be absent when Miss Holt arrives [Laura And Steele] We have to talk.
Of course.
Uh, your office seems much more suited for intimate chats.
I'll, uh, get some addresses for us.
- [Exhales] - [Both] You first.
- This is ridiculous.
I will start.
- All right.
Something has come up.
Something that because of its delicate nature demands that you as Remington Steele cannot be involved.
- Not involved? - Now don't take it so hard - For how long? - Just 48 hours.
- Forty-eight hours? - Please, try to understand.
- Oh, of course.
- This isn't my choice.
- Of course not.
- The client feels that your involvement would only add unwanted publicity to an already sensitive situation.
Laura, say no more.
I completely understand.
- You do? - Let's be honest with one another.
I mean, you are the Remington Steele Detective Agency.
Its guiding force.
Its most valuable asset.
And if you feel that you can function best without me - then all I can do is accept it.
- You can? I'll simply find something to occupy myself with for the next 48 hours.
But if you need anything or want anything no matter how small, how menial how distasteful you have simply to call me.
Thank you.
Godspeed.
Ah! Psst.
[Snaps Fingers] - How'd he take it? - Wonderfully.
- Couldn't have been more understanding.
- What does that tell you? I don't know but the hair on the back of my neck is standing straight up.
This is where you got the plans for an intricate jewel robbery? My friend Herschel.
Herschel Gruber.
Herschel used to work for Harrod's.
Herschel also used to work for Al Capone.
Herschel's been around.
Oh, I see.
Mm-hmm.
Okay.
Mm-hmm.
- Excuse me.
Can you tell us where we can find - Sign in, please.
- Herschel Gruber.
- You relatives? Friends? - Cell mates.
- Why? Does it matter? Not to me.
It's just that old Herschel kicked o passed away two months ago.
- Two months ago? - But that's not possible.
He sent me the plans three weeks ago.
Tough trick.
Even for Herschel.
Thank you.
- You gotta believe me, Mr.
Steele.
- I do believe you, Morrie.
I'm beginning to think there's more here than meets the eye.
- What do you mean? - Well, for one thing you were sent plans for a jewelry store heist by a dead man.
When you get there, there's no jewels to heist.
- You think I was set up? - The question is, why? And by whom? [Starts Engine] Herschel Gruber.
Janitor, retired.
Weird.
Nobody ever visited Herschel while he was alive.
Today, boom! It's a Herschel Gruber convention in here.
- You in the can with him too? - The men's room? - Prison.
- Prison? Herschel Gruber was in prison? The way he tells it, they named a wing after him.
Laura, we could be onto something here.
- Well, how? The man's been dead for two months.
- Yeah.
I miss him too.
Only thing most of these old people want to talk about is their bowels.
Herschel Herschel was full of great stories.
Capone, Bugs Moran, St.
Valentine's Day Massacre.
You wouldn't happen to have the names or addresses of the people who visited Herschel would you? The older guy signed the book.
Oh.
Uh, Morrie Singer.
Had a younger guy with him.
Looked like he walked right out of a cologne ad.
- Accent and everything.
- Do you have a telephone book? Over there.
What do you say, Happy? You glad to see me? I bet you thought I wasn't coming back, huh? Fat chance.
Morrie [Clears Throat] Recapitulate the events of the evening for me.
- Come again? - Uh, what happened last night? - Oh.
Well, everything went smooth as silk.
- Mm-hmm.
With the plans Herschel sent me, I mean we disconnected the alarm system, and Frank torched the safe - and we went inside, one, two, three.
- [Forced Exhale] Only it was empty.
Every drawer.
Every tray.
Clean like a whistle.
- Not even those little dust balls.
- Right.
- The first order of business is to speak with your sponsor.
- Mr.
Considine? If you and your cohorts explain that the safe was empty when you arrived He'll blow the heads off the three of us instead of just me.
Morrie, the clock is ticking.
If we're to uncover the real culprits, we have to buy time.
Please.
- [Footfalls Approaching] - Considine's men.
- Come on.
The back door.
- What about Happy? - He can fend them off.
Come on.
- [Doorknob Rattling] - All clear.
- Mm-hmm.
- I think you can put that down.
- The sign said, "Beware of dog.
" I think they bought the sign first.
[Chuckles] Oh, spare set of keys, with one these license plate tags.
- "GOJ 318.
" - This looks interesting.
The rental ticket says this tuxedo and two others were ordered the night of the robbery.
Well, that's it.
You don't rent formal wear to rob a jewelry store.
Probably has a great alibi.
A wedding where 200 people saw him.
- Yeah.
Wish I hadn't found it.
- Then again what would you wear if you didn't want to stick out at a place - filled with wedding receptions and bar mitzvahs? - Keep going.
Of course.
That's why nobody saw anything.
This Morrie Singer and his two henchmen march right through the front doors along with all the other guests.
Probably had the valet bring their car around when they were through.
[Chuckles] Murphy, I'm not reaching for this, am I? Herschel Gruber is a con.
He used to work for Harrod's Jewelry, right? The place gets robbed.
A guy goes to visit Herschel.
Same guy rents three tuxedos the night of the robbery? - And he's also a con.
- [Both Laugh] You know, you could make a living at this detecting business.
- You think so, huh? - Yeah.
This feels good.
- What? - You and me working together.
The way we did be Do you realize we've spent an entire afternoon together without mentioning his name? - Looks like Mr.
Singer called somebody named Louis.
- I don't know about you - but I never even thought of him today.
- Why don't we visit this Louis? - See if he fits one of these tuxedos.
- Did you? - Did I what, Murphy? - Think of him today.
Well, we've been quite busy.
Well, then there's hope for the patient's complete recovery.
That is, if she wants to recover.
Come on.
Clock's ticking.
Keep up the good work.
[Whines] [Chugging] Apartment 3.
- [Gunshot] - [Tires Screech] [Tires Screeching] - Louis.
- Come on.
- Come on! - What? We're gonna chase them? - That's the general idea.
- What are we gonna chase them with? - I'll drive.
- Oh, no.
This used to be a helluva car in its day.
Just like I was.
Listen, do yourself a favor, let it warm up.
[Tires Screeching] "GOJ 318.
" Laura, it's Morrie Singer in that Charger.
[Brakes Squeal] - [Gears Grind] - Where's fourth gear? Fourth gear? I haven't used fourth gear since - What was the year the astronauts walked on the moon? - '69, I think.
That was the year.
But it's there someplace.
Just keep shaking the stick.
[Groans] [Morrie] Ohh, boy.
! Come on.
Pick a gear, any gear.
Oh, how could you let an automobile get into such a condition? I told you to let it warm up.
You're gaining on them.
You're gaining on them.
You're losing them.
You're losing them.
You're gaining on them.
You're gaining on them.
You passed them.
What kind of a chase is this? He's coasting to a stop.
- [Grunts] - He's trying to send me a message, that Considine.
He's trying to tell me he's serious.
That would certainly be my interpretation.
Perhaps it's incumbent upon us to let him know that we've received the message.
- I don't get you.
- I think it's time we paid your Mr.
Considine a visit.
- That is if we can locate a gear that functions.
- [Gears Grinding] Mr.
Singer to see Mr.
Considine.
Morrie.
Morrie.
You've no idea what a relief it is to see you again.
I've been very concerned about you.
I haven't seen you in a couple of days now.
L I've been trying to think of what to say to you, Mr.
Considine.
Well, I can understand that, Morrie.
I've been trying to think of what to say to my board of directors about an old man who comes to me with one final score he wants to pull in my territory.
So I supply him with the men, $20,000 to pay them the tools to do the job right and then the smoke clears, and there's no old man, no $20,000 no 20%% of the take, so I can understand your timidity.
Mr.
Considine, we got there, the safe was empty.
Morrie, do you have any idea how my board of directors will react when I tell them a story like that? Badly.
Very badly.
They're gonna force me to make an example of you.
- The way you did with Louis? - Precisely the way I did with Louis.
- I don't believe we've had the pleasure.
- John Robie.
And I can vouch for Mr.
Singer's veracity.
Can you? What makes you think he's telling the truth? Because I'm the fellow who beat him to the safe.
That strikes me as a very dangerous confession to make right here, right now.
Oh, on the contrary.
I feel very safe.
As long as I know where the jewels are and you don't I rather suspect I'm one of the healthiest men alive.
All right, Mr.
Robie.
Why are you here? What do you want? Better terms.
Oh, I know you agreed with Morrie to take 20%% but, uh, that feels a little rich.
After all, you didn't supply me with any men, any money.
- Then why negotiate with me at all? - I did work in your territory.
And I did do it without your permission.
Just a feeling, but I feel that your board of directors might feel compelled to make an example out of me.
Ten percent.
Plus the original 20,000 seems a more equitable arrangement.
[Sighs] Not that I don't have confidence in you, but-but - you don't have the haul from that safe, do you? - Not yet.
All right.
If it's none of my business, say so, but why did you tell Considine that you did? Still buying time, Morrie.
Can't very well search for the thieves if we're dead.
As long as we're negotiating, they have to keep us alive.
[Starts Engine] Private investigators, hmm? And you're here because? Because Morrie Singer led us here, Mr.
Considine.
Morrie Singer.
Morrie Singer.
I'm afraid I don't know anyone named Morrie Singer.
- He's a man with a problem, Mr.
Considine.
- Really? The way we have it worked out, Morrie Singer, small-time thief pulls a small-time job and comes up with a big-time jewel.
One he can't possibly get rid of through his small-time fence.
- That's fascinating.
- So he needs a big-time fence.
I'm in the import-export business, my friend.
One-of-a-kind, rare items.
Yes, but you're a member of a very exclusive family.
Our client is willing to offer half a million dollars no questions asked if the stone is returned.
- And if it isn't? - The burglary will be reported to the police the news media, and whoever comes in contact with it will find they're handling a very hot rock.
I'm sure a man with your delicate connections has a penchant for privacy.
And the wrong kind of publicity can often prove fatal.
Morrie, when you reached the safe, did it look as if someone had already violated it? Uh, drill shavings, torch marks? Frank was operating the torch.
If something wasn't kosher, for sure he would've seen it.
Hmm.
Well, there may be more than one way to skin a cat but there are only two ways to get into a safe.
Your way, using the combination.
- [Laughs] - Bernice, you should've seen her.
Eye to eye with one of the top syndicate people in the country.
If we didn't put the fear of God into Mr.
Considine at least he knows we're around.
I think it's safe to fill him in now.
Uh-uh.
[Intercom Buzzes] Miss Wolfe, uh, did I hear the lilt of Laura's laughter? - She just came in.
- Ah.
Perhaps, uh, we should take my associate Miss Holt into our confidence.
- But I thought we agreed - Yes, I know we agreed to but, uh, she's terribly reliable, extremely competent and, uh, closemouthed to a fault.
All right.
If you think it'll help.
L-I really don't feel right about excluding him like this.
But the client specifically asked us not to involve him.
I know, but he seems so appropriate for a jewel robbery.
You've gone a whole day without him.
Laura, it's just like smoking.
The longer you stay away, the less craving you have.
So, dinner.
Now.
With me.
I love it when I'm forceful.
- It's a new side of you.
- You like it? Well, it's different.
- Well, then what the hell.
- [Gasps] Laura, I was wondering Excuse me.
- No.
It's all right.
- Sorry to intrude.
- Oh, we were just - Of course you were.
God.
He thinks we were We were.
- [Clears Throat] - Well, did you tell your associate? No.
She was, um, otherwise occupied.
Uh, I want you to stay at my place tonight.
A minor precaution.
I'll visit your friend Frank.
If there were no marks on the safe when you got there then Mr.
Harrod will look more and more like a prime suspect in his own robbery.
Happy? You're a very perceptive man, Mr.
Singer.
Uh, no, I'm not terribly happy at the moment.
Apparently my associate Miss Holt and her associate Mr.
Michaels seem to have developed more than a professional relationship.
[Clears Throat] It's partly my fault, I'll grant.
You see, I have this difficulty making commitments.
Especially the kind a woman like Miss Holt demands.
Consequently, I can't really blame her.
Mr.
Michaels, however [Exhales] Is an unconscionable swine using my enforced absence to worm his way into her affections and God knows what else.
- Happy is my dog.
- Pardon? I thought maybe you could bring him to your apartment.
He hates sleeping alone.
Stupid, ain't it? A dog should be so sensitive? But that's the way my Happy is.
Yes, well, everyone needs someone.
Me, I don't care one way or the other.
I'll pick him up on my way back from Frank's.
Come on.
- [Knocking On Door] - [Steele] Frank? - [Doorknob Rattles] - Frank? I'm a friend of Morrie Singer's.
- I need to speak with you.
- [Knocking] Frank, open the door.
I ripped the place apart.
No diamond.
No jewels.
Not even a pair of cuff links.
Morrie Singer's a man of very modest means.
He must've stashed it somewhere.
Ah.
Ham and cheese on rye.
Not exactly the dinner I had in mind.
[Laughs] Shut up and eat.
If I were a better man, I'd apologize for what I did in the office.
But I'm not going to.
I enjoyed it too much.
Murphy, the stakeout is hardly the place to delve into Laura, we've been together for a long time.
Together, but not together, if you know what I mean.
You're going to delve, aren't you? I know I'm no competition for him in looks.
And that smarmy kind of charm he has.
I'm a very straight-ahead guy.
No curves.
No wiggles.
And I care about you.
More than a business associate.
More than a friend.
I think we could have something very special together.
I had no idea.
- What? - You felt this way.
- And now that you know? - Well - You're confused, right? Well, that's great.
- Yes.
At least you're not bored or turned off or put to sleep.
I mean, confusion is an emotion, and one emotion leads to another.
Who knows where emotion can take us? I'm afraid it can't take us where you want it to go.
It's him, isn't it? He's not even here and he's here right between us.
I'm not gonna give up.
I'm just gonna view this as a temporary setback.
I'm gonna make you look at me in a different light.
[Murphy] That's Morrie's car.
Let's grab him.
If he doesn't have the diamond on him, he'll know where it is.
[Murphy] Cover the back.
Let's go, Happy.
Up, up, up.
Come on, Happy.
Come on.
Surely you haven't forgotten how to walk, eh? [Footfalls Approaching] Come on.
Come on, Happy.
There you go.
- [Whining] - No.
Shush.
Shush.
Be quiet.
I knew you'd be good for something.
- [Groans] - [Car Engine Starts] - Oh, dear God.
- Something the matter? - You're not supposed to be here.
- What are you talking about? They guaranteed me you'd stay out of this.
Guaranteed you I'd stay out of what? Who are you anyway? I'm Albert Harrod.
Now, please, leave before someone sees you.
Not playing much of a cat and mouse game, are you, Mr.
Harrod? - I should like to examine your safe.
- No.
I beg of you.
Pleading holds no sway with me.
Simply show me the safe door.
If it's been adulterated twice, you're no longer a suspect.
- Suspect? Me? - But if there's only one torch hole in it then a combination was used to gain access and that makes you a prime candidate in my book.
Did they tell you I have a heart condition? I want you to know that before you go further.
- Then you refuse to show me the safe door? - What safe door? - It's already been replaced.
- Shrewd, Harrod.
Very shrewd.
But the truth is, your behavior is enough evidence of your guilt anyway.
I shall return.
Probably with the authorities.
Good day.
I want to speak to Miss Holt.
I don't care if she's having open-heart surgery.
Put her on the phone.
- You sure it was him? - Mr.
Harrod was more than sure.
He was livid.
- [Buzzes] - I don't understand it.
Why would he show up at Harrod's Jewelry demanding to see the safe? Come on! Open up! Laura, let me kick it in.
Just this once, all right? Save your strength.
There are much more rewarding things to kick.
I know women's lib is very big these days, but a lady hit man.
- I know him.
- I'm warning you.
He may look dead, but that dog is a killer.
You take one step two If you take two three steps That dog has been nothing but a disappointment to me from the day I first found him.
That's Morrie Singer's dog You're Morrie Singer? What are you doing here? Where's Mr.
Steele? - He left early this morning.
- I'm Laura Holt, Mr.
Steele's associate.
- Who's he? - He works with Mr.
Steele.
- Murphy Michaels.
- Ah, the unconscionable swine, huh? - You know, you hurt Mr.
Steele.
- I hurt him? All right, so he can't make a commitment.
But that's no reason you should fling your affairs in his face.
He cares for you, young lady.
You would see that if you'd stop fooling around with every Tom, Dick and Murphy who comes your way.
I beg your pardon? It's not my pardon you should beg.
And as for you, young man, be a mensch.
Don't beat your boss's time.
Get your own girl.
[Phone Ringing] - Hello.
- Just got a call from Mr.
Considine.
Said he'd located the stone you're looking for and wants to see you A.
S.
A.
P.
[Laughs] Fasten your seat belt, Murph.
We're about to make this thing fly.
[Groans] Congratulations, Miss Holt.
You're a very clever woman.
Since you've made it impossible for me to accept the stone quietly I have no other alternative than to see its return to its rightful owner.
- Awfully civic of you.
- Keeps you out of jail nets you 500,000 in the bargain.
I don't want any part of that money.
My involvement has already been far too public as it is.
Once I put you together with the man who has the stone, I'm out of it.
And for everyone's longevity, I'd like to suggest you lose my address.
- [Knocking] - Right on time.
Nothing like a prompt thief.
Miss Holt.
Mr.
Michaels.
May I present Mr.
John Robie.
- John Robie? - To Catch a Thief.
Cary Grant.
Grace Kelly.
Paramount, uh, 1955.
I thought it was apropos.
Have you any idea what Laura and I have been doing the last two days? - I believe I caught a glimpse of it last night.
- He means professionally.
- Oh.
- We've been looking for your client.
- The man who robbed Harrod's Jewelry store.
- And who hired you? - Albert Harrod.
Who else? - [Laughs] How ingenious.
Albert Harrod retains you to find a thief who broke into his safe.
Why do you find that so extraordinary? That's the way it's supposed to work.
- We're hired by victims, not criminals.
- Rubbish.
The man's nothing more than a well-dressed swindler out to defraud his insurance company.
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
Where did you get that? The safe was apparently empty and unblemished when Morrie Singer arrived to rob it.
Which means whoever committed the robbery gained entry through use of the combination.
Which means the thief is none other than your client.
Brilliant piece of deductive reasoning.
Thank you.
Don't be embarrassed.
We all make mistakes.
Some of them more disastrous than others.
Can we stick to business? - Apparently, you can't.
- Gentlemen, please.
While this is all very flattering, this isn't getting us anywhere.
Your theory has one giant hole.
Albert Harrod isn't filing an insurance claim.
- He isn't? - No.
- Why not? - Because one of the gems found in the safe was worth in excess of two million dollars.
Having it in the safe was a violation of the terms of his insurance which is why he hired us to find the thief who hired you.
You say there was a single stone worth over two million in that safe? - Morrie didn't tell you that? - [Morrie] Morrie didn't know.
Look, folks, I may be a thief, but I'm not a liar.
And I swear this is the first I've heard about a two million dollar stone.
I mean, I was looking for something that would be easy to fence.
A rock that size would take years to unload.
I haven't got years.
- If he didn't do it - And Harrod didn't do it Then it must be someone we don't work for.
- Looking on the bright side.
- But there is someone who wasn't surprised that diamond was in the safe.
- Who was willing to accept it quietly.
- Considine.
- Who hired your crew, Mr.
Singer? - Considine.
- Is that customary? - No, no.
I told him I had two of my own guys but he insisted, made it part of the deal.
And a man of his connections would know the whereabouts of a two million-plus diamond.
Ah, no wonder Frank didn't say anything about that safe already being torched.
- He was in on it.
- Thought there was something odd about his body the night I found it he seemed so calm.
Unlike Louis, suitcase packed, the man running for his life.
But like he was, uh, having a conversation with someone.
A friend, a partner.
There's a little item I forgot to mention.
[Clears Throat] Herschel used to work for Considine.
- [Exhales] - All we need now is the rock.
If I had a two million-dollar diamond I wouldn't let it get far from home.
Merely returning it won't settle the score.
That man's responsible for two deaths.
Well, if we can't persuade him to accept prison and the police over his associates he'll literally get away with murder.
- How are we gonna do that? - Thomas Crown Affair.
Steve McQueen, Faye Dunaway, United Artists, 1968.
Gentlemen, this is a robbery.
Cooperate and you'll live to tell your grandchildren.
I hope so.
Do you know who I am? Do you know who these gentlemen are? - Inside! - Yeah.
M-M-M Move! Look, if you insist on this lunatic venture you'll never live to enjoy any of what you take here today.
Open the safe.
I'm afraid I'm going to have to refuse.
Open it, Considine.
These people are serious.
Look, we'll deal with them later.
For now, you do just what they say.
[Quietly] Think Tampa.
The 60-carat job from Harrod's.
- You had it all along.
- Building a little nest egg with our money? - You're a corpse, Considine.
- Get away.
All right, hit the floor.
All of you.
- You two.
- I don't know who you guys are but you gotta take me with you, please.
- Take me with you.
- Okay.
- Miss Holt.
- Get in! - [Engine Revs] - It's not in gear.
How could a man let an automobile get in this condition? - [Grunts] - Now.
- [Laughter] - The way Considine ran into that police station.
It certainly was safer than facing his friends.
Rather a neat scheme.
Funding a heist with syndicate money then keeping the spoils for yourself.
Who'd believe the safe was cleaned out before poor Morrie even got to it? Yeah.
[Chuckles] Thank you for procuring that reward for him.
Well, he did help recover the diamond.
Now he's on his way to Tampa a hero.
Well, why don't you two run along? You must be chomping at the bit.
- Chomping at what bit? - No need to be a genius to see that working in such close harmony these past few days has altered the nature of Laura's relationship with Murphy.
It has? And I must say, I'm delighted.
- For both of you.
- Excuse me.
What's she doing? Setting the record straight, damn it.
- [Exhales] - If you're referring to what you saw in my office It's no secret I've harbored feelings for you but I don't mind stepping aside for someone as worthy as Murphy.
[Sighs] You know what they say Three's a crowd.
If I thought there was some vague hope that - I know what you're doing.
- You do? You think the more you step out of the picture, the more I'll try to drag you back in.
Why, Laura.
How can you suggest such a thing? I just want you two kids to be happy.
The hell you do.
[Mews]