SpongeBob SquarePants s01e16 Episode Script

Sandy's Rocket

Hey, Sandy! Hey, Sandy! Hey, Sandy.
( loud whirring ) Wow! Howdy, SpongeBob! How do you like it? What is it? It's a rocket ship, duh! I'll meet you downstairs and show you around.
Wow! What are you going to do with it? I'm going to the moon, SpongeBob.
The moon! Can I go? No way, SpongeBob, especially after your little mishap with my whirlybird.
Besides, there's not enough room for you.
But I don't take up that much space.
See? I can fit in here.
Mmm cozy.
I need that drawer.
Well, how about this, or this, or this? SpongeBob, this isn't for fun-- see this? This is science.
I don't have time for fun and games and I don't have time for stowaways.
Fine.
Put me in the brig.
I don't mind.
That's the air vent, SpongeBob.
I need that, too.
Oh, please, can I go? Can I, can I, huh, please? All right, y'all can ride in the cargo hold if you just Yeah! Going to the moon! Moonride, moonride, moonride! But this time, just don't touch anything, okay? Wow! Look at that popgun.
Are we going to go hunting aliens on the moon? Oh, hush, silly.
This is for harvesting moon rocks.
Well, when you're done playing with rocks, you could use that for some serious alien hunting.
Aliens? Are you nuts? I've been to the moon.
There are no aliens.
Sandy, Sandy, Sandy.
How can you be so naive? There's evidence all around us.
How do you explain Atlantis, cowlicks, 99-cent stores? And how about those mysterious circles that pop up in kelp fields overnight? Aah! There's one now.
SpongeBob, you don't know the first thing about outer space.
Now, go home and get some shuteye.
Be here tomorrow at the crack of dawn and leave your crazy alien notions behind.
( snoring ) ( alarm clock ticking loudly ) Oh, hurry up! This ought to do the trick.
PATRICK: Hiya, SpongeBob.
What is it, Patrick? Can't you see I'm sleeping here? Well, I know you're going on that moon trip tomorrow and I just wanted to bring you something.
A present? No.
Uh SpongeBob? Is Sandy's rocket alien-proof? There are no aliens, Patrick.
Just ask Sandy.
Well, I guess you won't be needing this alien repellent for your trip.
Alien repellent? Let me see that.
"New Alien-Out! Window Protectant.
Does not stop burglars.
" Well, I guess you're right, Patrick.
We better go spray those windows.
PATRICK: Look how big it is, SpongeBob! It's pretty impressive, all right.
Come on! We're just here to spray the windows, Patrick.
Here Here Here Wow Here Here Here how do you think we get inside? We don't.
We're just spraying the windows.
I opened it, SpongeBob! Come on! Holy sea cow, SpongeBob.
This must be the control room.
Yeah, just don't touch anything.
Look, I'm winning! Patrick, cut that out.
Patrick, come on.
We can't hang around in here.
This is Sandy's big rocket, not some kind of fun house.
Whoo! Winner.
Yeah, high score! Hey, Patrick, what game was that, anyway? I don't know, but let's see what this does.
Patrick, I don't think we should I like rockets.
More, more! No more.
Okay, one more.
Okay, that's enough.
Let's go.
Wait, I think this one starts it.
Patrick, what are you doing? I'm the space traveler here, and I happen to know that that particular button is right over here.
( engine roaring ) We've started the rocket! ( sirens blaring ) Oh, SpongeBob.
( sirens wailing ) ( screaming ) Hang on, buddy! Hey, we stopped falling.
Look, we're in space now! Whee! ( moaning dizzily ) Hey, somebody get me down or up, or something.
( laughing ) Hey, SpongeBob, watch this.
Hey, you got your toothpaste in my peanut butter.
( laughing ) Patrick, I can do this.
Hey, who turned the heavy back on? We must be landing.
All right.
Sometimes that SpongeBob is as dumb as a sack of peanuts.
( squeaking ) Wow, it sure looks a lot like home.
Hey, look, it's Gary.
Come here, Gary, Gary.
Wait! Don't go near him, Patrick.
Can't you see this is all a trick? The aliens are projecting our memories onto the environment.
They're trying to confuse us, Patrick.
So you mean to say they've taken what we thought we think and make us think we thought our thoughts we've been thinking our thoughts we think we thought I think? Okay, but I'm not going to fall for it.
( meows ) Yeah! You got him, SpongeBob.
Won't Sandy be proud? Sandy I forgot all about her.
Oh, she's going to hate us for stealing her rocket, but won't she feel silly when I bring her back a real, live alien? Oh, she'll love me.
Come on, Patrick, the more the merrier.
( bell rings ) Alien hunting, alien hunting! Shh, Patrick, don't let them know we're on to them.
( artificially ): Uh yeah, alien hunting-- I saw that on TV, too.
Gee, Patrick, let's drop in on our old pal Squidward, and see what he's up to.
( quietly ): Make sure your gun is pumped.
( snoring ) Look at it, Patrick.
It's disgusting.
( snoring ) ( mutters ): Mmm grandma.
It's even uglier up close.
Let's begin the analysis.
Wait what's that? I think I'm going to be sick.
Patrick, do you know what this thing is? Stinky.
No it's an egg sac.
Let's look at the embryo.
Twins.
Twins.
( mumbling ) Pardon my French, but get this thing off me! ( screaming ) Patrick and SpongeBob, get out of my bedroom and give me back my tentacles.
It's awake! Let's capture the little phony.
Oh, get away from me.
( yelling ) ( yelling and noise inside ) Ahoy, there, lads.
Up a bit late to be playing pirate, aren't ye? ( laughing ) ( gasps ) Wait, don't shoot.
Okay, okay, shoot me, but don't take me money.
We don't want your money, moon man.
Look at them squirming around in there.
Ooh gross.
Well, plenty more where those came from.
Shh SpongeBob, what are you doing here so late? Whatever this is ( in deep voice ): it's going on your permanent record.
( moaning and whining ) This is ridiculous! Please let me out of here! Ouch! Ow! ( captives all squawking ) SpongeBob, I think we might have to make a second trip.
There's no time for that-- just push harder.
SANDY: SpongeBob, what are y'all doing? I can't turn my back on you for two seconds without you causing a whole mess of trouble.
Why, look at you, bagging up all your friends and neighbors just like they was a fresh crop of hickory-smoked sausages.
You done turned my little science experiment into a disaster.
You two ought to be ashamed of yourself.
Nice try Sandy.
Or should I say, Miss Alien Pants? ( laughing ) Aliens?! Is that what this is about? This isn't the moon.
We're still in Bikini Bo Just goes to show you, you can't trust anyone.
So you were an alien all the time and you didn't even tell me.
I didn't even know.
Yeah? Well, I got you now.
Oh, but it's not you that's got me; it's ( popgun pops ) Me that's got me.
Boy, I can't wait to see the look on Sandy's face.
( motor conks out ) Sandy, I'm back.
Wow! Bikini Bottom sure looks different.
Uh-oh.
CAPTIVES: SpongeBob we "aliens" would like a word with you.