Teen Titans Go! (2013) s04e02 Episode Script
Halloween vs. Christmas
1 "Halloween vs.
Christmas" [OPENING THEME PLAYING.]
[INDISTINCT CHATTER.]
[LAUGHING.]
[LAUGHING CONTINUES.]
[LAUGHS.]
Okay, Titans, Halloween is tonight.
The trick-or-treaters are going to be out in force, and we need to be ready.
Cyborg, Beast Boy, you're on candy.
Those trick-or-treaters are gonna freak when they find out we're handing out those full-size bars.
- Yeah, baby size is for chumps, yo.
- Bold choice.
I like it.
Raven, Starfire, you're on decorations.
Let's give those trick-or-treaters nightmares for weeks.
Then let's get all the candy and decorations we can find, so the fun can begin.
Titans, go! [MUFFLED.]
Man, how's they not even have any Halloween junk for sale? Not even a single plastic spider ring.
[FLY BUZZING.]
I can't believe we won't have any candy to hand out.
Don't sweat it, yo.
I gots the candy covered.
From last year.
I keeps it on me just in case.
I'd say the trick-or-treaters will appreciate that, but I don't see any.
Did I hear you have candy? [CHUCKLES.]
You heard right.
I gots that good year-old candy.
Ooh.
[CACKLES.]
Oh, goody.
Aren't you forgetting to say something? [STUTTERING.]
Oh, ja, ja.
Yes.
Trick and treat.
It's "trick or treat.
" How do you not know that? And aren't you a little old to be trick-or-treating? And why are your candy sacks shaped like the Christmas stockings? I said trick and treat, and I mean it, you garbage kids.
[GASPS.]
Those aren't trick-or-treaters! It's Santa and his elves! Code Red and White! Everyone in the car now! Move, move! [MUSIC.]
Bring me that candy! He's gaining on us! Destroy them with your nose so bright! [ALL EXCLAIM.]
- We're being boarded, yo! - On it.
[BOTH YELL.]
[ALL SCREAMING.]
[ALL CONTINUE SCREAMING.]
Give me the candy, you garbage children! [SANTA LAUGHING.]
[LOUD THUDDING.]
Santa really wants that candy.
I know the dude has a sweet tooth, but dang.
[LASERS FIRING.]
[THUDDING CONTINUES.]
It's not the candy he wants, it's the holiday itself.
That's why we couldn't find any Halloween candy or decorations.
He's erased every trace of them from town.
This bag is the last remnant of Halloween spirit.
But why would Santa wish to eradicate the Halloween? It's the only holiday that people look forward to as much as Christmas.
And Santa can't stand that.
If he takes control of Halloween, no holiday will be safe.
And Christmas' influence will stretch over the entire calendar.
[LAUGHS.]
[OVER PA.]
Why don't you come out peacefully? Children, Santa has presents for you.
Ooh, the presents.
[GASPS.]
A limited edition vinyl of The Night Begins To Shine, - signed by B.
E.
R.
? - BEAST BOY: Tofu? RAVEN: Butterbean's Pegasus Ranch playset! STARFIRE: A live kitten cat! [MEOWS.]
- No, it's a trap.
- But But the kitten cat Forget about the kitten cat! [OVER PA.]
We're not falling for it, Kringle.
You might as well head back to the North Pole.
Santa will head back to the North Pole the second you give me the bag of Halloween candy, and I control the holiday.
Never.
Well, if we're going to be here a while, why don't we all enjoy some delightful holiday music to pass the time? Play all the Christmas carols you want, Santa! You're not laying one sausage finger on this candy! We'll see.
We wish you a Merry Christmas We wish you a Merry Christmas We wish you a Merry Chris Oh, Christmas tree [GRUNTS.]
- # Oh, Christmas tree # - Don't do it.
[GRUNTING.]
Deck the hall with boughs of holly [GRUNTS.]
- # Jingle bells, jingle bells # - Ooh! That's enough.
[CAROLS CONTINUE.]
[GRUNTING.]
I can't take it! I need to get a tree.
- I want to bake a ham.
- Stop him.
[SLAPS.]
Sorry.
That music just puts me in the Christmas spirit.
- We're powerless against its influence.
- We can't take much more of this.
Beast Boy, call the Jolly Fat Man.
Tell him we're willing to negotiate.
We said no weapons, Santa.
Oh, ho-ho-ho! Santa must have forgotten.
- And the candy canes.
- Oh, have a heart.
Let my hungry little elves have their snack.
Very well.
ELVES: Yay! Now give Santa the last bag of Halloween candy, so we can all go home.
Or should I just take it? - Try it! - He's not worth it.
[GRUNTING.]
Let me at him! You might wanna put a leash on that dog of yours.
[YELPS.]
What did you say, you cookies and milk smelling oaf? Raven, take it easy.
Easy.
We're just talking, okay? Real calm.
I'm cool.
Look, Santa, we can't give you Halloween, but we are willing to meet you halfway.
[WHISTLES.]
Presidents' Day.
Nobody cares about Presidents' Day.
- Most people don't even get it off.
- Then we will sweeten the pot.
[BABY CRIES.]
Do you really think I need those trash holidays? I only need Halloween.
Once I control it, all other holidays will be forced to bow to me.
Now give Santa the candy! [ALL GASP.]
You said they were snacks.
Never trust Santa.
Elves! Run! We tried to do this peacefully.
Now, we have only one option.
War.
But the Santa is too powerful.
Remember, Halloween is the only holiday that can rival Christmas.
We just need to call on all its strength.
- Raven, you're up.
- I'm gonna need a pumpkin for the ritual.
- Will a squash work? - Yeah, but where I keeps it on me, just in case.
A witch's eye.
A dragon scale.
A mummy's hand.
A goblin's tail.
And a handful of candy corn.
[MUNCHING.]
- Stop eating them! - Oh, but they're so good, Mama.
Yeah, they are yummy.
Mmm.
Two candy corn.
Who summons my might on this All Hallows' Night? Oh, great Halloween spirit, we need your help to save Halloween.
Save Halloween? Whatever do you mean? Santa is trying to take over the holiday.
The Jolly Fat Man wants my day? You and I will make him pay.
Scary creatures of the night, I call you forth to help us fight! [HOWLING.]
[ROARS.]
Looks like it's time to take the fight to Santa.
All hail the Jolly Fat Man [MUSIC.]
All the kids are so - Santa! - Look, the garbage children.
Here to give up? You are outnumbered after all.
Think again.
Titans, Dracula, Wolf Man, Frankenstein and great Halloween spirit, go! [HOWLS.]
[ALL GASP.]
Naughty, naughty, naughty.
Oh, looks like I've been bested, and Santa's patience must not be tested.
Better hand over that Halloween candy, to big, fat, jolly old Santy.
Fine, Santa, you win.
The candy's mine.
Halloween is mine.
Santa wins, you garbage children.
[LAUGHS.]
[BEEPING.]
Wait a second, these aren't treats - ROBIN: That's right.
- They're tricks! [BEEPS.]
[FARTS.]
We did it, Titans.
We saved Halloween from Santa! [ALL CHEERING.]
It's not too late for Halloween Night.
Let's make sure we do it right.
[MUSIC.]
Merry Halloween to all, and to all a scary night! [MONSTROUS LAUGHING.]
[THEME MUSIC PLAYING.]
Christmas" [OPENING THEME PLAYING.]
[INDISTINCT CHATTER.]
[LAUGHING.]
[LAUGHING CONTINUES.]
[LAUGHS.]
Okay, Titans, Halloween is tonight.
The trick-or-treaters are going to be out in force, and we need to be ready.
Cyborg, Beast Boy, you're on candy.
Those trick-or-treaters are gonna freak when they find out we're handing out those full-size bars.
- Yeah, baby size is for chumps, yo.
- Bold choice.
I like it.
Raven, Starfire, you're on decorations.
Let's give those trick-or-treaters nightmares for weeks.
Then let's get all the candy and decorations we can find, so the fun can begin.
Titans, go! [MUFFLED.]
Man, how's they not even have any Halloween junk for sale? Not even a single plastic spider ring.
[FLY BUZZING.]
I can't believe we won't have any candy to hand out.
Don't sweat it, yo.
I gots the candy covered.
From last year.
I keeps it on me just in case.
I'd say the trick-or-treaters will appreciate that, but I don't see any.
Did I hear you have candy? [CHUCKLES.]
You heard right.
I gots that good year-old candy.
Ooh.
[CACKLES.]
Oh, goody.
Aren't you forgetting to say something? [STUTTERING.]
Oh, ja, ja.
Yes.
Trick and treat.
It's "trick or treat.
" How do you not know that? And aren't you a little old to be trick-or-treating? And why are your candy sacks shaped like the Christmas stockings? I said trick and treat, and I mean it, you garbage kids.
[GASPS.]
Those aren't trick-or-treaters! It's Santa and his elves! Code Red and White! Everyone in the car now! Move, move! [MUSIC.]
Bring me that candy! He's gaining on us! Destroy them with your nose so bright! [ALL EXCLAIM.]
- We're being boarded, yo! - On it.
[BOTH YELL.]
[ALL SCREAMING.]
[ALL CONTINUE SCREAMING.]
Give me the candy, you garbage children! [SANTA LAUGHING.]
[LOUD THUDDING.]
Santa really wants that candy.
I know the dude has a sweet tooth, but dang.
[LASERS FIRING.]
[THUDDING CONTINUES.]
It's not the candy he wants, it's the holiday itself.
That's why we couldn't find any Halloween candy or decorations.
He's erased every trace of them from town.
This bag is the last remnant of Halloween spirit.
But why would Santa wish to eradicate the Halloween? It's the only holiday that people look forward to as much as Christmas.
And Santa can't stand that.
If he takes control of Halloween, no holiday will be safe.
And Christmas' influence will stretch over the entire calendar.
[LAUGHS.]
[OVER PA.]
Why don't you come out peacefully? Children, Santa has presents for you.
Ooh, the presents.
[GASPS.]
A limited edition vinyl of The Night Begins To Shine, - signed by B.
E.
R.
? - BEAST BOY: Tofu? RAVEN: Butterbean's Pegasus Ranch playset! STARFIRE: A live kitten cat! [MEOWS.]
- No, it's a trap.
- But But the kitten cat Forget about the kitten cat! [OVER PA.]
We're not falling for it, Kringle.
You might as well head back to the North Pole.
Santa will head back to the North Pole the second you give me the bag of Halloween candy, and I control the holiday.
Never.
Well, if we're going to be here a while, why don't we all enjoy some delightful holiday music to pass the time? Play all the Christmas carols you want, Santa! You're not laying one sausage finger on this candy! We'll see.
We wish you a Merry Christmas We wish you a Merry Christmas We wish you a Merry Chris Oh, Christmas tree [GRUNTS.]
- # Oh, Christmas tree # - Don't do it.
[GRUNTING.]
Deck the hall with boughs of holly [GRUNTS.]
- # Jingle bells, jingle bells # - Ooh! That's enough.
[CAROLS CONTINUE.]
[GRUNTING.]
I can't take it! I need to get a tree.
- I want to bake a ham.
- Stop him.
[SLAPS.]
Sorry.
That music just puts me in the Christmas spirit.
- We're powerless against its influence.
- We can't take much more of this.
Beast Boy, call the Jolly Fat Man.
Tell him we're willing to negotiate.
We said no weapons, Santa.
Oh, ho-ho-ho! Santa must have forgotten.
- And the candy canes.
- Oh, have a heart.
Let my hungry little elves have their snack.
Very well.
ELVES: Yay! Now give Santa the last bag of Halloween candy, so we can all go home.
Or should I just take it? - Try it! - He's not worth it.
[GRUNTING.]
Let me at him! You might wanna put a leash on that dog of yours.
[YELPS.]
What did you say, you cookies and milk smelling oaf? Raven, take it easy.
Easy.
We're just talking, okay? Real calm.
I'm cool.
Look, Santa, we can't give you Halloween, but we are willing to meet you halfway.
[WHISTLES.]
Presidents' Day.
Nobody cares about Presidents' Day.
- Most people don't even get it off.
- Then we will sweeten the pot.
[BABY CRIES.]
Do you really think I need those trash holidays? I only need Halloween.
Once I control it, all other holidays will be forced to bow to me.
Now give Santa the candy! [ALL GASP.]
You said they were snacks.
Never trust Santa.
Elves! Run! We tried to do this peacefully.
Now, we have only one option.
War.
But the Santa is too powerful.
Remember, Halloween is the only holiday that can rival Christmas.
We just need to call on all its strength.
- Raven, you're up.
- I'm gonna need a pumpkin for the ritual.
- Will a squash work? - Yeah, but where I keeps it on me, just in case.
A witch's eye.
A dragon scale.
A mummy's hand.
A goblin's tail.
And a handful of candy corn.
[MUNCHING.]
- Stop eating them! - Oh, but they're so good, Mama.
Yeah, they are yummy.
Mmm.
Two candy corn.
Who summons my might on this All Hallows' Night? Oh, great Halloween spirit, we need your help to save Halloween.
Save Halloween? Whatever do you mean? Santa is trying to take over the holiday.
The Jolly Fat Man wants my day? You and I will make him pay.
Scary creatures of the night, I call you forth to help us fight! [HOWLING.]
[ROARS.]
Looks like it's time to take the fight to Santa.
All hail the Jolly Fat Man [MUSIC.]
All the kids are so - Santa! - Look, the garbage children.
Here to give up? You are outnumbered after all.
Think again.
Titans, Dracula, Wolf Man, Frankenstein and great Halloween spirit, go! [HOWLS.]
[ALL GASP.]
Naughty, naughty, naughty.
Oh, looks like I've been bested, and Santa's patience must not be tested.
Better hand over that Halloween candy, to big, fat, jolly old Santy.
Fine, Santa, you win.
The candy's mine.
Halloween is mine.
Santa wins, you garbage children.
[LAUGHS.]
[BEEPING.]
Wait a second, these aren't treats - ROBIN: That's right.
- They're tricks! [BEEPS.]
[FARTS.]
We did it, Titans.
We saved Halloween from Santa! [ALL CHEERING.]
It's not too late for Halloween Night.
Let's make sure we do it right.
[MUSIC.]
Merry Halloween to all, and to all a scary night! [MONSTROUS LAUGHING.]
[THEME MUSIC PLAYING.]