Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (1987) s03e32 Episode Script
9059-033 - Usagi Yojimbo
Teenage mutant ninja turtles teenage mutant ninja turtles teenage mutant ninja turtles heroes in a half shell turtle power they're the world's most fearsome fighting team We're really hip.
They're heroes in the half shell and they're green Hey, get a grip.
When the evil shredder attacks these turtle boys don't cut him no slack teenage mutant ninja turtles teenage mutant ninja turtles splinter taught them to be ninja teens He's a radical rat.
Leonardo leads, Donatello does machines That's a fact, Jack.
Raphael is cool but rude Michelangelo is a party dude teenage mutant ninja turtles teenage mutant ninja turtles teenage mutant ninja turtles heroes in a half shell turtle power lions gate entertainment hurry, Raphael.
We haven't much time.
We're too late.
The video store is closed.
Great.
Now, we'll have to pay an extra day's rental on this movie.
Hey, that's cool.
I wouldn't mind watching the radioactive salamander that nibbled New York a few more times.
What the heck? The turtles.
It's general tragg.
Who invited him over? Whoa! I'll handle this, dude.
Whoa! Ugh! Hey, no fair.
Don't tell me we're being haunted by the ghost of general tragg.
Couldn't be.
Last I heard, he was still alive.
Yeah, but in dimension x, not here.
Oh, that means krang's messing around with his dimensional portal again.
Come on.
If we can contact the nutrinos, they might have some clue of what krang's been up to.
Sure, we'll just dial long distance and ask for the area code for dimension x.
No sweat.
I've been working on a pan-dimensional portal of my own.
This is bogus, right? No, it's the real thing.
Of course, I haven't actually tested it yet, but Anybody got any chewing gum? This isn't exactly instilling me with a whole lot of confidence, Donatello.
What in blazes happened, shredder? Why did you bring over general tragg? Why are you fooling around with my portal? And why didn't he materialize fully? The teleporter is a newer version on our old transdimensional portal.
Only now, it will teletransport material objects to a predetermined location.
I hope all this isn't too much for you to follow, krang.
I'm one big brain, remember? Continue.
I've discovered the location of something I've been searching for ever since I left Japan.
And now, it's within my grasp.
Here we go, gang.
I've got all Something seems to be interfering with the transdimensional reception.
Are you sure it's supposed to do that, shredder? Whoa! ¿que pasa? Looks like ancient Japan! Shredder's portal must be knocking my transdimensional signal off track.
Check it out.
That little dude's facing off against those humongous hogs.
Now, ronin, you will pay for disobeying the shogun.
Be warned.
You are no match for me.
We shall see.
Whoa! Talking pigs and rabbits! I find that a little hard to swallow.
Not like talking turtles, right? Are they mutants like us? I don't think so.
This must be some kind of alternate earth, where animals, not humans, became the dominant species.
Man, this dude is good.
Yiii! Turtle guards, eh? I suppose the shogun's cowardly son lord bissen sent you.
Mellow out, bugs.
Come back and fight, floppy ears.
I'll handle this.
Huyyah! Your swordsmanship is excellent.
Now let us test the quality of your blade.
Now, who will challenge me? I will, dude.
Such superb technique, such mastery of form, such Delicious taste.
What strange style of fighting is this? I would call it slapstick.
I surrender to you.
Please spare my life, and teach me this slapstick.
This device is far from perfect.
Well, so are you.
Don't worry, I'll find the problem and fix it.
Promises, promises.
My name is usagi yojimbo.
That means rabbit bodyguard.
I am a ronin, a masterless samurai.
He's not only from medieval Japan, but also from an alternate universe.
So, naturally, he speaks English.
What strange castle is this? Well, it's not exactly a castle.
It's more like a sewer.
It is quite, uh, picturesque.
We must returun usagi to his own world.
He does not belong here.
But, sensei, tuning into his dimension was a zillion to one fluke.
I could never find its coordinates again.
You mean he's, like, stuck here? I have no master, no home.
Take me with you.
Let me learn of your strange, new world.
Do you think we ought to, sensei? To turn him away would mean his certain demise.
Put her there, little ace.
Put what where? Hmm.
Most curious.
Welcome to the group, dude.
Usagi's going to need a disguise.
Well, how do I look? Like a regular 14th century fashion plate.
My, such big castles.
So, where are we headed? Channel 6.
You saw how shredder's signal interfered with my portal.
When he uses that thing, electronics probably go haywire all over town.
But why channel 6? When things go crazy, who's gonna find out faster than a newsroom? Hey, yo, friar tuck, step right up and win a kewpie doll.
It'll really brighten up the monastery.
Here, take them all.
Please.
Hello? Hello? What the heck's going on here? All midtown's gone crazy, and now the phones are dead.
April, what happened to you? I was taping in midtown when all our cameras blew up.
Oh, great.
Great, great, great.
A big story is breaking, and we can't even cover it.
Hi, fellows.
Who's your friend in the monk's outfit? I am a stranger in your land.
Please accept these tokens of my friendship.
Why, thank you.
I love a man who comes bearing gifts.
Ahh, you are most welcome.
Oh, no, not another mutant.
First shells and now fur.
When did skin go out of fashion? Did I hear someone say mutant? He's not a mutant, April.
He's from another dimension.
I am most honored.
My name is usagai yojimbo.
And my name is mud if I don't find out what's causing this power disruption.
We're convinced it's shredder, but we don't know where the signal's coming from? Try midtown.
It worked for me.
Thanks.
There, it's working perfectly.
Now, to make contact with dimension x.
Let's hope you're successful, for your sake.
I like that woman.
Her ears were too small and she lacked fur, but she was nice.
Look! This is where shredder's teleportation beam is focused.
My theory was right.
Donatello, this is one time I wish you were wrong.
Scope it out, dudes.
Foot soldiers.
This has got to be shredder's doing.
Are those warriors your enemies? That's the understatement of the year.
Then they are my enemies, too.
Huyyah! Allow me the privilege of annihilating you.
Uncivilized peasants! I will teach you some manners.
Huyyah! All right, bag of bolts, take this? Hey! Someone get me out of here! All right, let me at those turkeys! Forget it, Mikey.
Our friend usagi's taken care of everything.
Terrific.
Now, I can retire and start writing my memoirs.
What manner of demons are these? They're not demons, dude.
They're robots.
They're machines made of metal, but designed to look like men.
This is powerful sorcery, indeed.
If we took one of these powerpacks back to the lair, I could home in on its frequency.
Another evil robot.
Shredder must be bringing those foot soldiers over for something.
We can keep tabs on them with this powerpack and find out what he's up to.
Then let's get back to the sewers.
Usagi? He's gone.
Swell.
We've got a runaway samurai bunny on our hands.
Donatello, you get back, and get to work on your plan.
The rest of us will have to find him.
What? All the foot soldiers destroyed? Those blasted turtles again.
One day, I'm going to send them a bill for all those robot parts.
But even they can't stop me from flooding the city with foot soldiers! Bonsoir.
And how many for dinner, monsieur? Seven, eight, nine.
I'm afraid you will need a reservation.
[COUGHS.]
Perhaps, in your case, I can make un petit exception.
Cowardly robot! We shall meet again! Ahh, my kind of place.
Where've you been? You're an hour late.
Now, hop to it.
Brothers! There.
Now, to find out what the foot soldiers are up to.
Looks like they're having a convention.
They are converging on the far eastern animal museum in little Tokyo town.
What could shredder possibly want there? It houses a collection of mystical oriental relics, all relating to animals.
My old friend obanto is guardian.
And whatever shredder is after, it can only lead to evil.
We must find the others and hasten there.
Here, my little ones.
Now, now.
There is plenty for all of you.
Do not worry, baby-San.
You are safe as long as you are here.
Arf arf! Meow! Who are you? What do you want? No, not baby-San.
Leave him alone! Uh, 2 carrot souffles, hold the Mayo.
Greetings, brother.
A question, please.
Why are there so many of us rabbits here? Quit goofing off, you two, and get back to work.
Yeah, we slave all day while that creep just bosses us around.
I cannot believe it.
All my brother creatures, slaves.
I must liberate them.
Hey, you! What do you think you're-- you will see that we rabbits are not to be trifled with.
Join in, brothers! Fight for your freedom! What are you doing? Leave baby-San alone.
No, you mustn't! We're on our way to meet you.
Have you found usagi? Not a trace of him.
[PEOPLE SCREAMING.]
Cancel that.
I'll get him.
Excuse me.
Look out.
Pardon me.
Out of my way.
Now you know not to enslave innocent rabbits.
I've had just about enough of this.
Hey, dude, like, don't be so hostile.
What are you doing here? I'm rescuing my furry little bud.
You're supposed to be in my turtle soup restaurant down the street.
Now, get back there and get to work.
I do not understand.
Did I do something wrong? No, little dude.
You did everything just right.
The foot soldiers have left little Tokyo town.
They've gone to the midtown power plant.
Then that's where we're headed.
This is the place.
Why are they guarding a smokestack? Here comes the answer.
[GRRR.]
I'm sorry I asked.
[GRRR.]
Time to boogie, dudes, and I'm talking warp speed.
Quick! Head for the turtle van! We must find obanto, the animal shelter guardian.
He is the only one who can control that beast.
Those are the only other foot soldiers in the city.
They must have him.
Donatello, you drive.
Usagi, you will accompany us.
The rest of you, try to keep the dragon at bay.
Let's go, fellows.
How come we get all the fun jobs? What a bummer.
Babysitter to a giant dragon.
[SNIFFS.]
Looks to me like he's hungry.
Check it out, dudes.
Grain elevators.
Hope he likes bran.
One grain elevator going down! Michelangelo, I have to admit it, that was a brilliant idea.
Thanks, amigo.
Uh-oh, it's getting bigger.
You and your dumb ideas.
This is where those 4 foot soldiers went.
"Ecological waste treatment center.
" That's ecological? Somebody ought to report these jerks.
Look! Help! Please, help me! They have obanto.
Come! Huyyah! You are one of the teenage mutant ninja turtles, but who is this? There is no time to explain, obanto-San.
That dragon egg of yours has hatched.
Baby-San is loose? This is terrible.
Can you do anything to stop him? There is a slight chance, but there is something I will need from the animal shelter.
Yo, dragon dude, this way! Good dragon.
I hope this new plan of yours works better than the old one.
Hey, it can't fail, dudes.
Except you forgot one thing.
The foot dudes! I'll try and hold them off.
Take turtle steel! Boy, I wish I could get to say lines like that.
Hey, big bud! Over here! [GRRR.]
Another great Michelangelo idea.
Hey, even great minds goof up once in a while.
Whoa! Look out! Man, it's going to be a hot time in the old town tonight.
Ah, I have found it, the blue flame of osaka.
The only thing that can save the dragon from the city.
Don't you mean save the city from the dragon? I know what I mean.
All units, into the power plant, and shoot to kill.
See? They're out to destroy him.
We must hurry! Hit us with your best shot! Vehicles, halt! Baby-San! They're going to slaughter him.
This is bad? You are a fellow reptile.
Surely you must know how humans misunderstand you, but the blue flame can save him.
Who among you is willing to place this in the dragon's mouth? Ohh Ohh Um I'm late Allow this humble ronin to try, obanto-San.
As you wish.
Ready Aim Huyyah! Fire! Uh, never mind.
Well, what went wrong this time? I don't know.
The city should be rubble by now.
I'll check the instant replay.
Who is that? Pah! Another mutant maggot.
Whoever he is, he is a superb samurai warrior.
That's it, blame your defeat on a cute, furry little bunny.
Ha ha! Laugh if you want to, krang, but one day, I'll have my rabbit revenge.
Baby-San will give you no more trouble, nor will anyone trouble him.
Now I understand what you meant about saving him from the city.
Had it not been for your efforts, this magical creature would have been destroyed.
Obanto-San, there is another creature who needs your protection, a stranger from a distant land, stranded in our world.
I will gladly care for him and keep him safe until you can find a way of returning him to his own world.
Looks like no TV for you tonight.
Try the next 20 years.
by lions gate entertainment
They're heroes in the half shell and they're green Hey, get a grip.
When the evil shredder attacks these turtle boys don't cut him no slack teenage mutant ninja turtles teenage mutant ninja turtles splinter taught them to be ninja teens He's a radical rat.
Leonardo leads, Donatello does machines That's a fact, Jack.
Raphael is cool but rude Michelangelo is a party dude teenage mutant ninja turtles teenage mutant ninja turtles teenage mutant ninja turtles heroes in a half shell turtle power lions gate entertainment hurry, Raphael.
We haven't much time.
We're too late.
The video store is closed.
Great.
Now, we'll have to pay an extra day's rental on this movie.
Hey, that's cool.
I wouldn't mind watching the radioactive salamander that nibbled New York a few more times.
What the heck? The turtles.
It's general tragg.
Who invited him over? Whoa! I'll handle this, dude.
Whoa! Ugh! Hey, no fair.
Don't tell me we're being haunted by the ghost of general tragg.
Couldn't be.
Last I heard, he was still alive.
Yeah, but in dimension x, not here.
Oh, that means krang's messing around with his dimensional portal again.
Come on.
If we can contact the nutrinos, they might have some clue of what krang's been up to.
Sure, we'll just dial long distance and ask for the area code for dimension x.
No sweat.
I've been working on a pan-dimensional portal of my own.
This is bogus, right? No, it's the real thing.
Of course, I haven't actually tested it yet, but Anybody got any chewing gum? This isn't exactly instilling me with a whole lot of confidence, Donatello.
What in blazes happened, shredder? Why did you bring over general tragg? Why are you fooling around with my portal? And why didn't he materialize fully? The teleporter is a newer version on our old transdimensional portal.
Only now, it will teletransport material objects to a predetermined location.
I hope all this isn't too much for you to follow, krang.
I'm one big brain, remember? Continue.
I've discovered the location of something I've been searching for ever since I left Japan.
And now, it's within my grasp.
Here we go, gang.
I've got all Something seems to be interfering with the transdimensional reception.
Are you sure it's supposed to do that, shredder? Whoa! ¿que pasa? Looks like ancient Japan! Shredder's portal must be knocking my transdimensional signal off track.
Check it out.
That little dude's facing off against those humongous hogs.
Now, ronin, you will pay for disobeying the shogun.
Be warned.
You are no match for me.
We shall see.
Whoa! Talking pigs and rabbits! I find that a little hard to swallow.
Not like talking turtles, right? Are they mutants like us? I don't think so.
This must be some kind of alternate earth, where animals, not humans, became the dominant species.
Man, this dude is good.
Yiii! Turtle guards, eh? I suppose the shogun's cowardly son lord bissen sent you.
Mellow out, bugs.
Come back and fight, floppy ears.
I'll handle this.
Huyyah! Your swordsmanship is excellent.
Now let us test the quality of your blade.
Now, who will challenge me? I will, dude.
Such superb technique, such mastery of form, such Delicious taste.
What strange style of fighting is this? I would call it slapstick.
I surrender to you.
Please spare my life, and teach me this slapstick.
This device is far from perfect.
Well, so are you.
Don't worry, I'll find the problem and fix it.
Promises, promises.
My name is usagi yojimbo.
That means rabbit bodyguard.
I am a ronin, a masterless samurai.
He's not only from medieval Japan, but also from an alternate universe.
So, naturally, he speaks English.
What strange castle is this? Well, it's not exactly a castle.
It's more like a sewer.
It is quite, uh, picturesque.
We must returun usagi to his own world.
He does not belong here.
But, sensei, tuning into his dimension was a zillion to one fluke.
I could never find its coordinates again.
You mean he's, like, stuck here? I have no master, no home.
Take me with you.
Let me learn of your strange, new world.
Do you think we ought to, sensei? To turn him away would mean his certain demise.
Put her there, little ace.
Put what where? Hmm.
Most curious.
Welcome to the group, dude.
Usagi's going to need a disguise.
Well, how do I look? Like a regular 14th century fashion plate.
My, such big castles.
So, where are we headed? Channel 6.
You saw how shredder's signal interfered with my portal.
When he uses that thing, electronics probably go haywire all over town.
But why channel 6? When things go crazy, who's gonna find out faster than a newsroom? Hey, yo, friar tuck, step right up and win a kewpie doll.
It'll really brighten up the monastery.
Here, take them all.
Please.
Hello? Hello? What the heck's going on here? All midtown's gone crazy, and now the phones are dead.
April, what happened to you? I was taping in midtown when all our cameras blew up.
Oh, great.
Great, great, great.
A big story is breaking, and we can't even cover it.
Hi, fellows.
Who's your friend in the monk's outfit? I am a stranger in your land.
Please accept these tokens of my friendship.
Why, thank you.
I love a man who comes bearing gifts.
Ahh, you are most welcome.
Oh, no, not another mutant.
First shells and now fur.
When did skin go out of fashion? Did I hear someone say mutant? He's not a mutant, April.
He's from another dimension.
I am most honored.
My name is usagai yojimbo.
And my name is mud if I don't find out what's causing this power disruption.
We're convinced it's shredder, but we don't know where the signal's coming from? Try midtown.
It worked for me.
Thanks.
There, it's working perfectly.
Now, to make contact with dimension x.
Let's hope you're successful, for your sake.
I like that woman.
Her ears were too small and she lacked fur, but she was nice.
Look! This is where shredder's teleportation beam is focused.
My theory was right.
Donatello, this is one time I wish you were wrong.
Scope it out, dudes.
Foot soldiers.
This has got to be shredder's doing.
Are those warriors your enemies? That's the understatement of the year.
Then they are my enemies, too.
Huyyah! Allow me the privilege of annihilating you.
Uncivilized peasants! I will teach you some manners.
Huyyah! All right, bag of bolts, take this? Hey! Someone get me out of here! All right, let me at those turkeys! Forget it, Mikey.
Our friend usagi's taken care of everything.
Terrific.
Now, I can retire and start writing my memoirs.
What manner of demons are these? They're not demons, dude.
They're robots.
They're machines made of metal, but designed to look like men.
This is powerful sorcery, indeed.
If we took one of these powerpacks back to the lair, I could home in on its frequency.
Another evil robot.
Shredder must be bringing those foot soldiers over for something.
We can keep tabs on them with this powerpack and find out what he's up to.
Then let's get back to the sewers.
Usagi? He's gone.
Swell.
We've got a runaway samurai bunny on our hands.
Donatello, you get back, and get to work on your plan.
The rest of us will have to find him.
What? All the foot soldiers destroyed? Those blasted turtles again.
One day, I'm going to send them a bill for all those robot parts.
But even they can't stop me from flooding the city with foot soldiers! Bonsoir.
And how many for dinner, monsieur? Seven, eight, nine.
I'm afraid you will need a reservation.
[COUGHS.]
Perhaps, in your case, I can make un petit exception.
Cowardly robot! We shall meet again! Ahh, my kind of place.
Where've you been? You're an hour late.
Now, hop to it.
Brothers! There.
Now, to find out what the foot soldiers are up to.
Looks like they're having a convention.
They are converging on the far eastern animal museum in little Tokyo town.
What could shredder possibly want there? It houses a collection of mystical oriental relics, all relating to animals.
My old friend obanto is guardian.
And whatever shredder is after, it can only lead to evil.
We must find the others and hasten there.
Here, my little ones.
Now, now.
There is plenty for all of you.
Do not worry, baby-San.
You are safe as long as you are here.
Arf arf! Meow! Who are you? What do you want? No, not baby-San.
Leave him alone! Uh, 2 carrot souffles, hold the Mayo.
Greetings, brother.
A question, please.
Why are there so many of us rabbits here? Quit goofing off, you two, and get back to work.
Yeah, we slave all day while that creep just bosses us around.
I cannot believe it.
All my brother creatures, slaves.
I must liberate them.
Hey, you! What do you think you're-- you will see that we rabbits are not to be trifled with.
Join in, brothers! Fight for your freedom! What are you doing? Leave baby-San alone.
No, you mustn't! We're on our way to meet you.
Have you found usagi? Not a trace of him.
[PEOPLE SCREAMING.]
Cancel that.
I'll get him.
Excuse me.
Look out.
Pardon me.
Out of my way.
Now you know not to enslave innocent rabbits.
I've had just about enough of this.
Hey, dude, like, don't be so hostile.
What are you doing here? I'm rescuing my furry little bud.
You're supposed to be in my turtle soup restaurant down the street.
Now, get back there and get to work.
I do not understand.
Did I do something wrong? No, little dude.
You did everything just right.
The foot soldiers have left little Tokyo town.
They've gone to the midtown power plant.
Then that's where we're headed.
This is the place.
Why are they guarding a smokestack? Here comes the answer.
[GRRR.]
I'm sorry I asked.
[GRRR.]
Time to boogie, dudes, and I'm talking warp speed.
Quick! Head for the turtle van! We must find obanto, the animal shelter guardian.
He is the only one who can control that beast.
Those are the only other foot soldiers in the city.
They must have him.
Donatello, you drive.
Usagi, you will accompany us.
The rest of you, try to keep the dragon at bay.
Let's go, fellows.
How come we get all the fun jobs? What a bummer.
Babysitter to a giant dragon.
[SNIFFS.]
Looks to me like he's hungry.
Check it out, dudes.
Grain elevators.
Hope he likes bran.
One grain elevator going down! Michelangelo, I have to admit it, that was a brilliant idea.
Thanks, amigo.
Uh-oh, it's getting bigger.
You and your dumb ideas.
This is where those 4 foot soldiers went.
"Ecological waste treatment center.
" That's ecological? Somebody ought to report these jerks.
Look! Help! Please, help me! They have obanto.
Come! Huyyah! You are one of the teenage mutant ninja turtles, but who is this? There is no time to explain, obanto-San.
That dragon egg of yours has hatched.
Baby-San is loose? This is terrible.
Can you do anything to stop him? There is a slight chance, but there is something I will need from the animal shelter.
Yo, dragon dude, this way! Good dragon.
I hope this new plan of yours works better than the old one.
Hey, it can't fail, dudes.
Except you forgot one thing.
The foot dudes! I'll try and hold them off.
Take turtle steel! Boy, I wish I could get to say lines like that.
Hey, big bud! Over here! [GRRR.]
Another great Michelangelo idea.
Hey, even great minds goof up once in a while.
Whoa! Look out! Man, it's going to be a hot time in the old town tonight.
Ah, I have found it, the blue flame of osaka.
The only thing that can save the dragon from the city.
Don't you mean save the city from the dragon? I know what I mean.
All units, into the power plant, and shoot to kill.
See? They're out to destroy him.
We must hurry! Hit us with your best shot! Vehicles, halt! Baby-San! They're going to slaughter him.
This is bad? You are a fellow reptile.
Surely you must know how humans misunderstand you, but the blue flame can save him.
Who among you is willing to place this in the dragon's mouth? Ohh Ohh Um I'm late Allow this humble ronin to try, obanto-San.
As you wish.
Ready Aim Huyyah! Fire! Uh, never mind.
Well, what went wrong this time? I don't know.
The city should be rubble by now.
I'll check the instant replay.
Who is that? Pah! Another mutant maggot.
Whoever he is, he is a superb samurai warrior.
That's it, blame your defeat on a cute, furry little bunny.
Ha ha! Laugh if you want to, krang, but one day, I'll have my rabbit revenge.
Baby-San will give you no more trouble, nor will anyone trouble him.
Now I understand what you meant about saving him from the city.
Had it not been for your efforts, this magical creature would have been destroyed.
Obanto-San, there is another creature who needs your protection, a stranger from a distant land, stranded in our world.
I will gladly care for him and keep him safe until you can find a way of returning him to his own world.
Looks like no TV for you tonight.
Try the next 20 years.
by lions gate entertainment