Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (1987) s05e15 Episode Script

9062-014A - Pirate Radio

[theme song] Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Heroes in a half shell Turtle power They're the world's Most fearsome fighting team We're really hip.
They're heroes in the half shell And they're green Hey, get a grip.
When the evil Shredder attacks These turtle boys don't cut him no slack Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Splinter taught them to be ninja teens He's a radical rat.
Leonardo leads Donatello does machines That's a fact, Jack.
Raphael is cool, but rude Gimme a break.
Michelangelo is a party dude Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Heroes in a half shell Turtle power This is the most despicable, fiendish invention of my entire evil career.
We give up.
What is it? It's a interdimensional splitting device.
Interdimensional spitting? [Rocksteady] Yuck, how disgusting.
That's splitting, you cretins! Not spitting! It's finally ready.
Now I will spit-- Split the dimension barrier, creating Krang's Chasm, a gaping, bottomless pit.
Ooh.
Hit the deck! Don't just stand there.
Do something! Uh, sorry, Krang.
I never was really good at jigsaw puzzles.
[snoring] [rock] Okay, that does it, I have got to get some Zs.
Michelangelo is out of here.
[rock] Wait a minute! We warned you, Michelangelo.
No more rock and roll! [Male DJ] Okay, canine cuties, chow down on this three-woof tune on pirate radio W.
O.
O.
F.
Woof, woof, woof! [Michelangelo] But dudes, I'm listening to my main man, Dicky Bark, the Woofman! And it's tune time, woof, woof, woof! Wrong, wrong, wrong! It's snooze time.
That Bark guy's woofing is driving me out of my shell.
But dudes, it's the numero uno station in the whole city.
Just give it a listen.
It'll grow on you.
Yeah, like a fungus! Hey, w--wait! You dudes will be sorry! [All] Good nightdude! Oh, sure, make me sleep in the cold, wet sewer.
Well, at least I've got Dicky Bark to keep me company.
All right, now, bubba, it's The Fleabags scratching their way up the charts with "Itching To See You, Baby" Woof, woof, woof! Just got off the road, gotta lighten my load [rumbling] Baby [rock continues] This is Pirate Radio, WOOF, where it's party time all the time.
Woof, woof, woof! Hey, it's the one-and-only Woofman, Dicky Bark! Whoo! What makes you so sure your contraption will even work, Krang? Because my creations are flawless.
That's why! And if you do cut this chasm in the dimension barrier, how are you planning to talk the citizens into passing through it? That's a good one-- Don't bother me with your endless questions.
I'll figure that out when I get to it.
Okay, Bebop, see if you get anything.
[Dicky Bark] Here's a radical beat of a platter that's melting the old turntable.
Ooh, ooh! It's Dicky Bark! [rock] Look what you've done, you idiot.
Turn that blasted thing off! We're trying, Krang.
We're trying.
Where'd that racket come from? The number one radio station in the city.
Yeah, Krang, everybody listens to W.
O.
O.
F.
[Both] Woof, woof, woof.
Everybody? How fortuitous! Hmm, I believe we are about to go into the radio biz.
Planning to launch a Krang's Chasm advertising campaign? Great, Bebop and me can do a jingle.
[Both] Come to Krang's Chasm, don't delay Jump right in, disappear today Don't give up your day jobs, you boobs! All we'll need is my ventrilocoder.
Speak through it and everything you say will be heard as a command that must be obeyed.
The citizens will bring about their own destruction by voluntarily leaping into the chasm.
And when the city is completely deserted, we take over.
Exactly.
Oh, boy, we're getting out of this deep freeze.
Goody, goody, goody! And W.
O.
O.
F.
is about to get a new DJ, the Slicer! [Donatello] I can't do it.
Michelangelo's out there alone and hungry.
Yeah, I hate to admit it, but I sort of feel sorry for the guy.
Maybe we should save this last slice for him.
[rock] [All] No way! And now, back to you, April.
Uh, thanks, Vernon.
That was an, um, interesting look at the plight of the Amazonian piranha.
Woof, woof, woofoops.
Uh--Uh, just a reminder, folks, It's 10 AM.
Do you know where your dog is? I mean, this is April O'Neil for Channel 6 News.
Oh, that does it, Irma! Either that pirate radio station goes or you do.
Oh, sorry, Mr.
Thompson.
Oh, you certainly will be.
And I had the audience eating right out of my hand.
Too bad they weren't Amazonian piranha.
I'm sorry, Vernon.
But Dicky Bark is just so incredible.
You really are obsessed with this Dicky Woofer guy, aren't you? You don't understand, April.
I just have to listen to station W.
O.
O.
F.
[car horns honking] Oh, no! Yikes.
Well, at least we made a soft landing.
This had better work, Krang.
[Rocksteady] Hey, boss? That radio signal homing thing is going wild! [beeping] It's found station W.
O.
O.
F.
[rock] [Rocksteady] It's coming from that manhole cover.
This was too easy! To the sewer! [rock] [Michelangelo] All right! Get down.
Hey, cool it, dudes! Huh, whoa.
Gee, boss, it ain't the radio station, it's this boom box.
I can see that, you moron! You wasted my time, Turtle.
And we're gonna waste you! Tell us where the radio station W.
O.
O.
F.
is headquartered, Turtle.
How should I know where it is, dude? And why do you want to know, anyway? That's for me to now and you to find out.
This'll make him talk, boss.
Hey, what are doing with my radio, snout face? Say bye-bye, boom box.
No! Oops.
Gee, I guess it slipped.
What's everybody got against my radio? It's just like you.
It's all wet.
That tears it.
Now I'm really ticked off! Keep him busy while I zero in on that radio signal.
Right, boss.
This is going to be a pleasure.
Let's go, Turtles! Uh, oh.
What's wrong, dudes? Chicken? Bock bock.
Hiyah! [All] Turtle power! Paws off our buddy, hog breath! Cowabunga, dudes! Stupenduloso timing! I think the odds just changed in their favor.
In that case-- Hey, Shredder, wait for us! Let's get them, fellas! [All] Let's kick some shell! These ought to slow them down! It's worth a try.
Whoa! Head's up! And in the center ring, the incredible, stupendous, Raphael the wonder Turtle! W.
O.
O.
F.
's radio signal is coming from the other side of that flood gate.
The only thing out there is the ocean.
What do we do now, boss? [Krang] Must I think of everything? We've got them now! Guess again, shellbacks.
I hope you brought your water wings.
Surf's up! Whoa! Shredder got away! Worse than that, I lost my boom box! Leave it to Michelangelo to put things in their proper perspective.
Got it! [Dicky Bark] This is W.
O.
O.
F.
, where the music never stops.
All right.
It still works.
Oh, brother.
[Shredder] I am now the captain.
You will do exactly as I say.
Yes, Captain.
It works! Now, to take over the minds of the entire city.
Okay, Michelangelo, we're letting you in under one condition, that you use these earphones, until I can come up with a way to save the rest of us from the Woofman.
No problemo, dude.
[rock] All right, Shredder, it's showtime! [Dicky Bark] Who are you guys, anyway? We're really big fans of yours.
Yeah, we'd like to have your autograph, but we can see you're all tied up.
[Krang] My automatic digital tuner beam is tuning every radio in the city to W.
O.
O.
F.
That means hundreds of thousands of people will be listening to my voice.
I'll be a star, able to get tables at the best restaurants, limos, charge accounts I've created a monster.
[easy listening] [rock] [easy listening] [rock] [rock] Hey, what's going on? [rock] [rock] [rock] This is really weird.
Michelangelo's station coming in on every radio in the lair! Yeah, tell me about it.
Here, I've just finished these white noise filters.
Stick them inside your ears.
It'll block out that radio frequency.
Ah, much better.
[alarm] [Donatello] My dimension alarm.
There's been a dimension split somewhere.
That could only mean Exactly.
Krang and Shredder.
[Shredder] This is your afternoon DJ, Slicer, with a public service announcement.
Your city is doomed.
There's only one way to save yourselves, and that's to split immediately.
Follow this radio signal.
Come to W.
O.
O.
F.
Slicer's got a neat surprise for you.
Be there or be square.
You know, he's not too bad.
Everyone hearing his voice will follow that radio signal right into Krang's Chasm.
Soon, the city will be mine.
Hey, who's this Slicer, dude? Must be a new drive-time DJ.
[timer ringing] All right! There's dessert.
[Shredder] You will do as I say.
Evacuate the city at once.
Follow this signal.
Come to Slicer.
[Shredder] Do as I say.
Come to W.
O.
O.
F.
Follow Slicer.
Go to W.
O.
O.
F.
Meet you in the studio, we're on the air in five minutes, Irma.
Go to Slicer.
Michelangelo, where are you? [coughing] I don't believe it.
He left a pizza in the oven.
And his boom box on the table.
There's something really weird going on here.
I have a feeling that Michelangelo's disappearance has something to do with that dimension split.
These white noise filters work great, Donatello.
Yeah, I don't hear a single woof.
[Turtlecom beeps] Donatello here.
Guys, Irma is missing.
She walked out of Channel 6 in the middle of a broadcast.
Well, you won't believe it, but Michelangelo is missing, too.
[Krang] Well, you can stop looking.
They're both about to vanish, like everyone else, into Krang's Chasm! Krang.
I knew you were behind that dimension split.
Impressive, isn't it? And Shredder's not doing badly with that DJ gig, either.
Tune into W.
O.
O.
F.
and hear for yourselves.
W.
O.
O.
F.
? Irma was hooked on that station.
[Donatello] So was Michelangelo.
Along with most of the city.
April, everyone listening to that radio station is under some kind of mind control.
My radio's going crazy! [Donatello] Turn it off, April! Don't listen to it! [Shredder] Come to W.
O.
O.
F.
Follow Slicer.
Follow Slicer.
I must follow Slicer.
Come to W.
O.
O.
F.
Must follow Slicer.
Leonardo, watch out! Hey, out of the way! You're blocking the street.
Whoa, there aren't any drivers in those cars.
[Donatello] They're all under Krang's spell.
Your white noise filters are the only thing that saved us.
Look! There's Michelangelo! Go to Slicer.
Must go to Slicer.
Watch that first step, Michelangelo! It's a beaut! Huh? Look! [Donatello] It's April! Go to Slicer.
Must go to Slicer.
We've got to save Michelangelo! Go to Slicer.
No, we've got to save April.
[Michelangelo and April] Go to Slicer.
Must follow Slicer.
W.
O.
O.
F.
calls.
Go to W.
O.
O.
F.
, Slicer beckons me.
Michelangelo and April are both about to step to their doom.
Oh, we can only rescue one of them, but which one will it be? Follow me! [All] Turtles to the rescue! Must follow Slicer.
Must go to WOOF.
Got him! Great job, Leonardo! Ha! One down and one to go! Next up, April.
Must go to Slicer.
Gotcha! Here, this will snap you out of it.
Whoa, Donatello, how did I get up here? Uh, you mind if I fill you in later? I'm coming, Slicer.
Michelangelo! Oh, no! Whoa! [April] He's landed in a tub with Irma.
Yeah, too bad he didn't bring his rubber duckie.
[Leonardo] The entire city is headed out to sea.
The station must be luring them there.
Rub-a-dub-dub, one Turtle in a tub.
Too bad the other three aren't under my control as well.
But now that I've captured one bonedome, the others are certain to follow.
[April] Tell me, how come you guys weren't affected by Shredder's broadcast.
Simple, we're wearing the same earplugs that I just gave you.
These white noise filters block out W.
O.
O.
F.
's frequency transmission.
Thanks.
Don't mention it.
There's the dock! Great, there isn't a single boat left.
How do we get out to that pirate radio ship? As Michelangelo would say, no problemo, dudes.
Let's do it, Leonardo! Right.
Hang on! [engine revving] [Turtles] Turtle power! [Shredder] Welcome to W.
O.
O.
F.
, where we spin the top tunes and dish out doom.
Keep rowing, you dunderheads.
You're almost there.
Keep rowing.
Must obey Slicer.
Yes, must keep rowing.
Okay, now nothing's gonna keep this boat from sailing right into Krang's Chasm.
Uh-oh.
Trouble off the port poop deck.
Or is it the starboard yardarm? [Rocksteady] Yikes! It's them Turtles! We better get the boss and abandon ship, fast.
Do something, Donatello! Irma and Michelangelo are about to be sucked into that vortex.
I think I've located the source of Krang's mind-control signal.
I should have known.
It's a ventrilocoder.
Of course! Isn't that neat, the way I always know the names of these gadgets? Can you do anything to reverse it? Do Turtles like pizza? I hope the Turtle van can handle this power drain.
This is your fave DJ, Slicer, telling you to keep those boats coming! What in blazes? Gee, boss, what happened? Nothing, you cretins! We're experiencing some technical difficulties! I gotta tell you, what you're experiencing, is your show being cancelled, but good.
No! That couldn't be! My fans adore me! This is your famous DJ Slicer! Follow the sound of my voice! [Shredder] Follow Slicer! Just keep rowing.
Michelangelo? Irma? What are you doing in my bathtub? Uh, got me.
Conserving water? We're in the middle of the ocean, and we're being pulled into that black hole! Paddle, dudette, paddle! Why do these things always happen to me? [Leonardo] Hang on, Michelangelo, we're on our way! Whoa! Thanks for lending me your grappling hook.
We made it! I don't believe it! [Michelangelo] Whoa, dude, that's the last bathtub I'm getting into for a long time.
Oh, no, no, please don't say that.
[Shredder] You're my fans.
You love me, you really love me.
[Bebop] The boss must really be a star.
The people are mobbing him.
No! Stop! Something tells me we better get out of here.
Hey! What's your hurry, compadre? The party's just getting started.
Whoa, I'm jumping ship! Hey, Rocksteady.
Up here.
Huh? Stop! Put me down! Thanks, folks, the Turtles will take it from here.
[April] Donatello, we're headed straight for the chasm.
Do something! I hope it's not too late.
They're gonna make us walk the plank.
Oh, stop acting like wimps.
The Turtles are good guys.
They wouldn't do a thing like that.
[Krang] They wouldn't, but I would.
Krang? Wait, Krang, couldn't we discuss this? [All] No! [April] And so DJ Dicky Bark, of radio station W.
O.
O.
F.
, says from now on, he'll only play mellow melodies.
With the city back to normal, this is April O'Neil signing off.
Whoa, dudes! You gotta dig these groovy sounds.
Oh, no, not again.
But-- All right, this is Dicky Bark, reminding you it's Vinny's gigantic two-for-one pizza sale, today only! See, dudes, that's what I wanted you to hear.
Woof, woof, woof.
[theme]