Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (1987) s05e16 Episode Script
9062-013B - Raphael, Turtle of a Thousand Faces
[theme song.]
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Heroes in a half shell Turtle power They're the world's Most fearsome fighting team We're really hip.
They're heroes in the half shell And they're green Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Hey, get a grip.
When the evil Shredder attacks These Turtle boys don't cut him no slack Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Splinter taught them to be ninja teens He's a radical rat.
Leonardo leads Donatello does machines That's a fact, Jack.
Raphael is cool, but rude Gimme a break.
Michelangelo is a party dude Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Heroes in a half shell Turtle power [shouting.]
Arrgh.
Avast, ye lubbers.
Keelhaul the mizzenmast.
Whoa, dudes, it's Long John Turtle.
Where's your parrot, compadre? Harr.
What are ye grinni'' at, ye scurvy swabs? Hey, nice wooden leg, Raphael.
But don't forget to screw it back on the TV table when you're through, huh? Oh, man! You guys peeked.
Whoa.
Better not bug him, dudes.
He might make us walk the plank into the bathtub! Very funny.
Ha ha ha.
I'm dying of laughter.
What got into him? Apparently, you have hurt his feelings.
I always figured he had a hard shell.
Raphael? Are you all right? Oh, sorry, sensei.
I guess I was a little steamed because I blew my assignment.
Yourassignment? I'm taking a correspondence course from Pinkerman's Private Peepers to be an undercover detective.
Oh! A detective.
Why, my student? So I can make more of a contribution to the mean green team.
You know, something special.
[chuckles.]
But each of you is already special.
Maybe.
But I'll be the only master of disguise.
Raphael? Uh, we just wanted to apologize.
We didn't know you were actually serious about this disguise thing.
Well, I am.
In fact, I'm going to prove I'm a master of disguise.
I challenge you guys to pick me out of a crowd.
Say, in the park.
In a half hour.
And if we do it? Then it's free pizzas for everyone.
Whoa, done deal, dude.
I think you're making a serious mistake, Raphael.
Yeah? We'll see about that.
In the park.
Sir! Sir! Dogs are not allowed in our bank.
Oh, yeah? Says who? Says me, and I am a vice president.
Guards! [growls, barks.]
[screams.]
[whimpers.]
Now, I'd like to make a withdrawal.
Yes, sir.
Right away, sir.
Oh, please, please.
Fill it up.
[laughs.]
Now, this is what I call "convenience banking.
" [barks.]
Let's go, boys.
Sergeant, do you have any leads as to who pulled off the bank robbery? Yeah, we think we've found an important clue.
A dog crunchy? There's only one criminal who eats these things, and that's Mad Dog McMutt.
You done great, boss.
This is just the beginning, boys.
Now we're ready to pull off the caper of the century.
The Museum of Natural History and a lifetime supply of priceless bones.
The perfect heist.
And I do mean "hoist.
" [laughs.]
[barks.]
You guys go fuel up the chopper, while I take myself for a little stroll in the park.
Hmm.
Let me see.
Which one of these lawbreakers should I disguise myself as? No, too easy.
Too handsome.
Ugh.
Too ugly.
A-ha.
The perfect face.
Mad Dog McMutt.
[humming.]
Yeah, a few more bags under the eyes here, andvoila! [chuckles.]
[Imitating Mad Dog.]
All right, you doubting tortoises, here come Raphael, Turtle of 1,000 Faces.
[laughs, howls.]
Irma, I couldn't believe it.
Today, I caught Vernon moving my office furniture out, and moving his in.
Ah, he could at least have had the decency to wait till you're officially fired.
Which can't be too far off.
My ratings are slipping faster than soap down a bathtub drain.
Hey, April, it's not your fault the competition has a talking mynah bird for a weatherman.
Yeah.
And Mr.
Universe in a tiger skin doing their political analysis.
[sighs.]
Oh, I hate sweeps week.
Let's face it, Irma.
If I don't come up with a great story by the end of the day, I'm out of the news business! Gosh, April.
Hey.
Isn't that-- [gasps.]
Mad Dog McMutt.
The one the police suspect pulled off that bank job today.
April, I hope you're not getting any dumb ideas.
Do you realize, if we can catch him taking a bite into crime, it'll be the story of the year! Huh-huh.
You're getting dumb ideas.
Wrong, Irma.
I'm saving my job.
[yawning.]
Yeah, well, there's nothing as relaxing as a nice stroll in the old park when you've been working like a dog.
[laughs.]
Well, send me to Kansas and call me Toto.
Look at the size of that bone.
Hey, how about sharing a little bit of that bone with me, pally? [growling.]
Mad Dog McMutt don't take no backtalk from man nor beast.
[barks, growls.]
[screams.]
[groans.]
[growls.]
How weird.
McMutt was right up the path from us, and now he's gone.
How come I think of that as good news? [Raphael laughs.]
Oh, boy, am I gonna enjoy this-- Those guys'll never recognize me in this disguise.
Look, Irma.
There he is.
It's McMutt.
Whoop-de-doo.
[Michelangelo.]
Oh, bodacious gag, dudes.
Shadowing Raphael, the Master of Disguise.
It is kind of a dirty trick.
But all's fair in war and pizzas.
Well, our amigo left behind a totally radical clue.
This must be who's Raphael's made up to look like.
Compadres, this is going to be a piece of cake.
We better find the boss.
It's gettin' to be that time.
There he is! Hey, boss.
We been lookin' all over for you.
Boss? Me? Yeah, Mad Dog.
We work for you, remember? Mad Dog? Oh, yeah, right.
[growls, coughs.]
Mad Dog.
That's me.
Now, what do you punks want? Oh, I know how hungry these walks make you.
So I brung you some doggy snacks.
D-Doggy snacks? Yeah.
Now open wide.
It's your favorite flavor-- groundhog.
[choking, coughing.]
Come on, boss.
We gotta get going.
Yeah.
We're pulling off the caper of the century.
Remember? [cackles.]
Uh, what's the big hurry? Are you guys, what, double-parked or something? [laughing.]
You're some kidder, boss.
Yeah.
[chuckling.]
Pretending you forgot about the caper of the century.
[laughing.]
Did you hear that, Irma? They're planning to pull off the caper of the century.
Are you sure he didn't say "kibble of the century"? Come on! This is the big story I've been hoping for.
Okay, guys, now let's keep an eye out for someone who looks like this Mad Dog McMutt.
This'll be too easy.
I could taste that pizza now.
[whimpering.]
[groans.]
What happened? How did I get here? There he is, compadres.
We found him.
I'll have my pizza with tuna fish, peanut butter and grape jelly.
Make that two.
Three.
Who are you guys? Better yet, who am I? Forget it, Raphael.
The loss of memory bit won't work.
And changing your voice won't help either.
Yeah, you lost the bet, dude.
Now, come on! I'll help you take off your disguise.
[grunts.]
What a gnarly nose, dude.
It's stuck on really tight! [barking.]
I'll teach you! [barking, yelling.]
Dude! Dude! Watch-- Oh, dude, look out.
Hey, come on, Raphael.
Don't be such a sore loser.
Is that my name? Raphael? [laughs.]
What a stupid moniker.
Uh-oh.
That's a pretty nasty lump he's got on his forehead.
Then he really did forget his name.
More than that, he forgot his voice.
Oh, okay, boss.
We're ready to hit the museum.
Uh, the museum? Yeah, the chopper's all gassed up.
And I planted the dynamite.
Dynamite? You okay, boss? I think I could use a little fresh air, you know? [growls.]
[barks.]
[laughs.]
"Fresh air!" What a card! Have a liver-flavored crunchy, boss.
Do they happen to come in pepperoni and cheese flavor? [laughs.]
What a kidder.
Pepperoni and cheese.
[continues laughing.]
[Irma.]
Haven't we got enough of a story already? Irma, I just know there's a major news story developing here.
[Irma.]
A giant fire hydrant? Now, what makes me think that's the hideout of a crook who looks like a Bassett hound? [April.]
Look.
They're pulling into the garage.
[Irma.]
Great! Now can we go home? Sure, as soon as I get my story.
Hey, are you guys trying to suffocate me, or what? We're bodyguards, remember? We're guarding your body.
Yeah, well, scram, before you give me claustrophobia.
Sure, boss.
Whatever you say.
You want we should warm up the chopper? Yeah, whatever.
Go on.
Just beat it! [door slams.]
Wow.
[normal voice.]
I never thought I'd get rid of those guys.
[growling, barking.]
[imitating McMutt.]
Hey.
I thought you mugs were leaving.
We came back when we heard the guard dogs barking.
Right.
Yeah, sure.
The, uh-- The guard dogs.
[laughing.]
Somebody must be snooping around.
[glass breaking.]
[guard dogs barking.]
Yeah, there's something funny going on here.
It's coming from the next room.
Look, boss.
We got company.
[giggling.]
Hi, fellas.
I'm April O'Neil, your roving reporter.
Ha, ha, ha.
And I'm Irma, her terrified roving assistant.
And ladies, your roving days are over.
[laughs.]
Yeah, I guess I got to be this guy Raphael, if you're all so sure about it.
Sure we're sure.
Trust us, compadre.
Once we figure out how to get that makeup off you, then-- [snarling.]
Oh, great.
Raphael.
Are you okay? Raphael.
Who's Raphael? Oh, no.
Not again.
Oh, wait a minute.
I remember that dog.
All right! You got your memory back! Yeah, I sure did.
[barking.]
What do you want to do with these snoopers, boss? Uh, you two get some rope.
I'll keep an eye on 'em.
What do you got in mind for them? I'm gonna take 'em for a little walk in the river.
With cement leashes.
[laughs.]
[howls like a dog.]
[cackles.]
Good idea.
To think the first time I saw him, I wanted to scratch behind his ears.
[door slams.]
[normal voice.]
It's me, guys.
Raphael.
Raphael? As in, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle? You know any other green-skinned Raphaels? Let's get out of here! [McMutt.]
So, how'd you fellows figure out I disguised myself as this McMutt guy? [laughs.]
Easy, Raphael.
First we shadowed you, and then we found the Wanted poster.
What Wanted poster? This Wanted poster, dude.
Look familiar? Oh, no! That means my boys must have hooked up with this Raphael clown instead of with me.
[growling.]
Oh, no.
That guy must have been-- The real McMutt! Let's go, Turtles.
[All.]
Turtle power! [Leonardo.]
We've got to stay on McMutt's tail! Right.
If Raphael is with McMutt's goons, he's in terrible danger! Look out, dude! [honking.]
[Michelangelo.]
Oh, mega-bummer.
He got away! What do we do now? The Turtlecom! Maybe April can tell us McMutt's whereabouts.
Calling April.
Come in, April.
[growling, barking.]
And here's the rope you asked for, boss.
Yeah, don't you want to tie 'em up? Uh, yeah, right.
Yeah, sure.
Tie them up.
Yeah.
[Turtlecom warbling.]
Hey, what's going on? What's with the pager? Hello, April.
Come in, April.
[gasps.]
A talking turtle? What? Uh-- I don't believe-- Get-- Let me see that stup-- What is this? Grab him, boys.
He's some punk named Raphael.
Oh, he is, eh? Hold onto that mug.
I got a bone to pick with him.
[screams.]
I'll get you for that.
Huh? A frog? Boy, if there's one thing I can't stand, it's losing face.
Wow! [grunting.]
Come on, let's lose these losers.
They can't do this to Mad Dog McMutt! You're darn right, boss.
So what do we do now? We set the dogs on 'em.
[laughs, howls.]
Yeah.
Good idea.
So long, snoopers.
[beeping.]
April, where are you? Speak to us! [dogs barking.]
Oh, no.
McMutt's guard dogs! Look! A way out! Come on, door! Why are we panicking? They're just dogs.
Right, and King Kong is just a monkey.
We made it! [McMutt.]
Welcome back, snoopers.
You're just in time to join us for the caper of the century.
Oh, yeah? And just what makes you think we'll go along with you? All right! Just curious.
All right, in there.
Ow! Boy, I expected economy class, but this is ridiculous.
At least they could have given us window seats.
What's going down, dude? Any luck yet? If we can just home in on April's Turtlcom-- [beeping.]
There it is! Head for midtown.
Put the pedal to the metal, dude! Yes, sir, today is my day to howl.
[howling.]
Museum of Natural History, here we come! We found it! McMutt's hideout.
[Michelangelo.]
Well, I'll be doggoned.
A building shaped like a fire hydrant? [Donatello.]
Uh-oh.
I have a funny feeling we just missed our flight.
All right, fellas.
Time for the Turtle Blimp.
That's it, boss.
The Museum of Natural History.
[McMutt laughing.]
All right, boys.
Time to blow the dynamite.
Yeah, bon appétit! [McMutt laughing, barking.]
That broke the museum loose from its foundation, now comes the heist.
You go keep an eye on that storage compartment.
We don't need no surprises.
Right, Mad Dog.
[Mad Dog howling.]
Michelangelo Holy guacamole! I guess Mad Dog doesn't like to pay the admission fee.
[Leonardo.]
They're firing at us.
It looks like a laser cannon.
We can't fire back.
They've got Raphael and April.
Oh, no.
They're firing at somebody.
Hurry, April.
You almost got it.
[ropes creaking.]
You did it! Now me! And me.
[knocking.]
Yeah? What do you want? [imitating Mad Dog.]
It's me, you bum.
Let me out of here.
But boss, we thought you were flying this chopper.
No, but you two are gonna be flying! Now let's stop those cannons.
I don't know how much longer we can dodge those laser cannons.
Wait a minute.
There's Raphael.
He's telling us to close in on 'em.
Here we go! Peek-a-boo.
Hey! You're all through! Hey! How'd you snoops get loose? Well, I never give away professional ninja secrets.
Now set this thing down, McMutt.
[chuckles.]
And how you gonna make me, wise guy? That's how! Back off, Turtle.
We got the drop on you.
You guys should have quit while you were losing.
[laser firing.]
Hey, we're goin' down.
We're going to crash? Well put.
[laughs wildly.]
[Women screaming.]
[sighs.]
We made it.
We're safe.
We may have made it, but we aren't safe.
Inside, you boneheads.
Come on, Fritz, Waldo.
We'll pull the caper of the century yet.
A Turtle getting nabbed by a dog.
The S.
P.
C.
A is gonna hear about this.
Turtles, fight with honor! Cowabunga! Come on.
Hurry up, you mugs.
My trigger finger's gettin' itchy.
[gasps.]
You beast! You'd actually steal a priceless dinosaur skeleton? [laughs.]
You bet! Bones like this only come along once in a million years.
Why you low-down hound dog.
How could you destroy public property like that? Ow! [howling.]
Yeah! Way to go, Irma! I don't believe it.
I actually did something right.
Yeah, well, it's the last thing you're ever gonna do, 'cause you're all headed for that big pound in the sky.
Oh! That does it! I'll take care of this.
Hey-ya! Hey-ya! Hey, what's goin' on? You are [yelling.]
on a trip to the penitentiary.
[growls.]
Whoa! [grunts.]
Hey, hey, help me! Let me out of here! April, where did you learn those ridiculous ninja moves? Hey, if you're in enough of these episodes, some of it's bound to rub off.
[laughs.]
Yeah, some of it.
Are you guys all right? Oh, they're better off than the dinosaurs.
No contest, amigo.
The dinosaurs have been dead for millions of years.
Outstanding job, compadre.
Hey, it wasn't just me.
April and Irma deserve the credit, too.
They helped capture McMutt intheir own way.
Uh, McMutt? Who's McMutt? My name's Raphael.
Oh, no, not again.
[April.]
And that concludes our exclusive videotape of the capture of Mad Dog McMutt.
This is April O'Neil, signing off.
Thanks, fellas.
Oh, don't mention it, dudette.
What was the thanks for? Well, because of that story, Burne Thompson signed April to a brand new three-year contract.
Truly a satisfactory conclusion.
But why is Raphael not here to share this happy occasion? He's decided to give up private investigation, Master Splinter.
Yeah.
Now the dude is taking up chemistry.
Excellent.
The study will open up many new doors for him.
[screams, groans.]
It'll open up a couple of walls, too.
[theme.]
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Heroes in a half shell Turtle power They're the world's Most fearsome fighting team We're really hip.
They're heroes in the half shell And they're green Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Hey, get a grip.
When the evil Shredder attacks These Turtle boys don't cut him no slack Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Splinter taught them to be ninja teens He's a radical rat.
Leonardo leads Donatello does machines That's a fact, Jack.
Raphael is cool, but rude Gimme a break.
Michelangelo is a party dude Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Heroes in a half shell Turtle power [shouting.]
Arrgh.
Avast, ye lubbers.
Keelhaul the mizzenmast.
Whoa, dudes, it's Long John Turtle.
Where's your parrot, compadre? Harr.
What are ye grinni'' at, ye scurvy swabs? Hey, nice wooden leg, Raphael.
But don't forget to screw it back on the TV table when you're through, huh? Oh, man! You guys peeked.
Whoa.
Better not bug him, dudes.
He might make us walk the plank into the bathtub! Very funny.
Ha ha ha.
I'm dying of laughter.
What got into him? Apparently, you have hurt his feelings.
I always figured he had a hard shell.
Raphael? Are you all right? Oh, sorry, sensei.
I guess I was a little steamed because I blew my assignment.
Yourassignment? I'm taking a correspondence course from Pinkerman's Private Peepers to be an undercover detective.
Oh! A detective.
Why, my student? So I can make more of a contribution to the mean green team.
You know, something special.
[chuckles.]
But each of you is already special.
Maybe.
But I'll be the only master of disguise.
Raphael? Uh, we just wanted to apologize.
We didn't know you were actually serious about this disguise thing.
Well, I am.
In fact, I'm going to prove I'm a master of disguise.
I challenge you guys to pick me out of a crowd.
Say, in the park.
In a half hour.
And if we do it? Then it's free pizzas for everyone.
Whoa, done deal, dude.
I think you're making a serious mistake, Raphael.
Yeah? We'll see about that.
In the park.
Sir! Sir! Dogs are not allowed in our bank.
Oh, yeah? Says who? Says me, and I am a vice president.
Guards! [growls, barks.]
[screams.]
[whimpers.]
Now, I'd like to make a withdrawal.
Yes, sir.
Right away, sir.
Oh, please, please.
Fill it up.
[laughs.]
Now, this is what I call "convenience banking.
" [barks.]
Let's go, boys.
Sergeant, do you have any leads as to who pulled off the bank robbery? Yeah, we think we've found an important clue.
A dog crunchy? There's only one criminal who eats these things, and that's Mad Dog McMutt.
You done great, boss.
This is just the beginning, boys.
Now we're ready to pull off the caper of the century.
The Museum of Natural History and a lifetime supply of priceless bones.
The perfect heist.
And I do mean "hoist.
" [laughs.]
[barks.]
You guys go fuel up the chopper, while I take myself for a little stroll in the park.
Hmm.
Let me see.
Which one of these lawbreakers should I disguise myself as? No, too easy.
Too handsome.
Ugh.
Too ugly.
A-ha.
The perfect face.
Mad Dog McMutt.
[humming.]
Yeah, a few more bags under the eyes here, andvoila! [chuckles.]
[Imitating Mad Dog.]
All right, you doubting tortoises, here come Raphael, Turtle of 1,000 Faces.
[laughs, howls.]
Irma, I couldn't believe it.
Today, I caught Vernon moving my office furniture out, and moving his in.
Ah, he could at least have had the decency to wait till you're officially fired.
Which can't be too far off.
My ratings are slipping faster than soap down a bathtub drain.
Hey, April, it's not your fault the competition has a talking mynah bird for a weatherman.
Yeah.
And Mr.
Universe in a tiger skin doing their political analysis.
[sighs.]
Oh, I hate sweeps week.
Let's face it, Irma.
If I don't come up with a great story by the end of the day, I'm out of the news business! Gosh, April.
Hey.
Isn't that-- [gasps.]
Mad Dog McMutt.
The one the police suspect pulled off that bank job today.
April, I hope you're not getting any dumb ideas.
Do you realize, if we can catch him taking a bite into crime, it'll be the story of the year! Huh-huh.
You're getting dumb ideas.
Wrong, Irma.
I'm saving my job.
[yawning.]
Yeah, well, there's nothing as relaxing as a nice stroll in the old park when you've been working like a dog.
[laughs.]
Well, send me to Kansas and call me Toto.
Look at the size of that bone.
Hey, how about sharing a little bit of that bone with me, pally? [growling.]
Mad Dog McMutt don't take no backtalk from man nor beast.
[barks, growls.]
[screams.]
[groans.]
[growls.]
How weird.
McMutt was right up the path from us, and now he's gone.
How come I think of that as good news? [Raphael laughs.]
Oh, boy, am I gonna enjoy this-- Those guys'll never recognize me in this disguise.
Look, Irma.
There he is.
It's McMutt.
Whoop-de-doo.
[Michelangelo.]
Oh, bodacious gag, dudes.
Shadowing Raphael, the Master of Disguise.
It is kind of a dirty trick.
But all's fair in war and pizzas.
Well, our amigo left behind a totally radical clue.
This must be who's Raphael's made up to look like.
Compadres, this is going to be a piece of cake.
We better find the boss.
It's gettin' to be that time.
There he is! Hey, boss.
We been lookin' all over for you.
Boss? Me? Yeah, Mad Dog.
We work for you, remember? Mad Dog? Oh, yeah, right.
[growls, coughs.]
Mad Dog.
That's me.
Now, what do you punks want? Oh, I know how hungry these walks make you.
So I brung you some doggy snacks.
D-Doggy snacks? Yeah.
Now open wide.
It's your favorite flavor-- groundhog.
[choking, coughing.]
Come on, boss.
We gotta get going.
Yeah.
We're pulling off the caper of the century.
Remember? [cackles.]
Uh, what's the big hurry? Are you guys, what, double-parked or something? [laughing.]
You're some kidder, boss.
Yeah.
[chuckling.]
Pretending you forgot about the caper of the century.
[laughing.]
Did you hear that, Irma? They're planning to pull off the caper of the century.
Are you sure he didn't say "kibble of the century"? Come on! This is the big story I've been hoping for.
Okay, guys, now let's keep an eye out for someone who looks like this Mad Dog McMutt.
This'll be too easy.
I could taste that pizza now.
[whimpering.]
[groans.]
What happened? How did I get here? There he is, compadres.
We found him.
I'll have my pizza with tuna fish, peanut butter and grape jelly.
Make that two.
Three.
Who are you guys? Better yet, who am I? Forget it, Raphael.
The loss of memory bit won't work.
And changing your voice won't help either.
Yeah, you lost the bet, dude.
Now, come on! I'll help you take off your disguise.
[grunts.]
What a gnarly nose, dude.
It's stuck on really tight! [barking.]
I'll teach you! [barking, yelling.]
Dude! Dude! Watch-- Oh, dude, look out.
Hey, come on, Raphael.
Don't be such a sore loser.
Is that my name? Raphael? [laughs.]
What a stupid moniker.
Uh-oh.
That's a pretty nasty lump he's got on his forehead.
Then he really did forget his name.
More than that, he forgot his voice.
Oh, okay, boss.
We're ready to hit the museum.
Uh, the museum? Yeah, the chopper's all gassed up.
And I planted the dynamite.
Dynamite? You okay, boss? I think I could use a little fresh air, you know? [growls.]
[barks.]
[laughs.]
"Fresh air!" What a card! Have a liver-flavored crunchy, boss.
Do they happen to come in pepperoni and cheese flavor? [laughs.]
What a kidder.
Pepperoni and cheese.
[continues laughing.]
[Irma.]
Haven't we got enough of a story already? Irma, I just know there's a major news story developing here.
[Irma.]
A giant fire hydrant? Now, what makes me think that's the hideout of a crook who looks like a Bassett hound? [April.]
Look.
They're pulling into the garage.
[Irma.]
Great! Now can we go home? Sure, as soon as I get my story.
Hey, are you guys trying to suffocate me, or what? We're bodyguards, remember? We're guarding your body.
Yeah, well, scram, before you give me claustrophobia.
Sure, boss.
Whatever you say.
You want we should warm up the chopper? Yeah, whatever.
Go on.
Just beat it! [door slams.]
Wow.
[normal voice.]
I never thought I'd get rid of those guys.
[growling, barking.]
[imitating McMutt.]
Hey.
I thought you mugs were leaving.
We came back when we heard the guard dogs barking.
Right.
Yeah, sure.
The, uh-- The guard dogs.
[laughing.]
Somebody must be snooping around.
[glass breaking.]
[guard dogs barking.]
Yeah, there's something funny going on here.
It's coming from the next room.
Look, boss.
We got company.
[giggling.]
Hi, fellas.
I'm April O'Neil, your roving reporter.
Ha, ha, ha.
And I'm Irma, her terrified roving assistant.
And ladies, your roving days are over.
[laughs.]
Yeah, I guess I got to be this guy Raphael, if you're all so sure about it.
Sure we're sure.
Trust us, compadre.
Once we figure out how to get that makeup off you, then-- [snarling.]
Oh, great.
Raphael.
Are you okay? Raphael.
Who's Raphael? Oh, no.
Not again.
Oh, wait a minute.
I remember that dog.
All right! You got your memory back! Yeah, I sure did.
[barking.]
What do you want to do with these snoopers, boss? Uh, you two get some rope.
I'll keep an eye on 'em.
What do you got in mind for them? I'm gonna take 'em for a little walk in the river.
With cement leashes.
[laughs.]
[howls like a dog.]
[cackles.]
Good idea.
To think the first time I saw him, I wanted to scratch behind his ears.
[door slams.]
[normal voice.]
It's me, guys.
Raphael.
Raphael? As in, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle? You know any other green-skinned Raphaels? Let's get out of here! [McMutt.]
So, how'd you fellows figure out I disguised myself as this McMutt guy? [laughs.]
Easy, Raphael.
First we shadowed you, and then we found the Wanted poster.
What Wanted poster? This Wanted poster, dude.
Look familiar? Oh, no! That means my boys must have hooked up with this Raphael clown instead of with me.
[growling.]
Oh, no.
That guy must have been-- The real McMutt! Let's go, Turtles.
[All.]
Turtle power! [Leonardo.]
We've got to stay on McMutt's tail! Right.
If Raphael is with McMutt's goons, he's in terrible danger! Look out, dude! [honking.]
[Michelangelo.]
Oh, mega-bummer.
He got away! What do we do now? The Turtlecom! Maybe April can tell us McMutt's whereabouts.
Calling April.
Come in, April.
[growling, barking.]
And here's the rope you asked for, boss.
Yeah, don't you want to tie 'em up? Uh, yeah, right.
Yeah, sure.
Tie them up.
Yeah.
[Turtlecom warbling.]
Hey, what's going on? What's with the pager? Hello, April.
Come in, April.
[gasps.]
A talking turtle? What? Uh-- I don't believe-- Get-- Let me see that stup-- What is this? Grab him, boys.
He's some punk named Raphael.
Oh, he is, eh? Hold onto that mug.
I got a bone to pick with him.
[screams.]
I'll get you for that.
Huh? A frog? Boy, if there's one thing I can't stand, it's losing face.
Wow! [grunting.]
Come on, let's lose these losers.
They can't do this to Mad Dog McMutt! You're darn right, boss.
So what do we do now? We set the dogs on 'em.
[laughs, howls.]
Yeah.
Good idea.
So long, snoopers.
[beeping.]
April, where are you? Speak to us! [dogs barking.]
Oh, no.
McMutt's guard dogs! Look! A way out! Come on, door! Why are we panicking? They're just dogs.
Right, and King Kong is just a monkey.
We made it! [McMutt.]
Welcome back, snoopers.
You're just in time to join us for the caper of the century.
Oh, yeah? And just what makes you think we'll go along with you? All right! Just curious.
All right, in there.
Ow! Boy, I expected economy class, but this is ridiculous.
At least they could have given us window seats.
What's going down, dude? Any luck yet? If we can just home in on April's Turtlcom-- [beeping.]
There it is! Head for midtown.
Put the pedal to the metal, dude! Yes, sir, today is my day to howl.
[howling.]
Museum of Natural History, here we come! We found it! McMutt's hideout.
[Michelangelo.]
Well, I'll be doggoned.
A building shaped like a fire hydrant? [Donatello.]
Uh-oh.
I have a funny feeling we just missed our flight.
All right, fellas.
Time for the Turtle Blimp.
That's it, boss.
The Museum of Natural History.
[McMutt laughing.]
All right, boys.
Time to blow the dynamite.
Yeah, bon appétit! [McMutt laughing, barking.]
That broke the museum loose from its foundation, now comes the heist.
You go keep an eye on that storage compartment.
We don't need no surprises.
Right, Mad Dog.
[Mad Dog howling.]
Michelangelo Holy guacamole! I guess Mad Dog doesn't like to pay the admission fee.
[Leonardo.]
They're firing at us.
It looks like a laser cannon.
We can't fire back.
They've got Raphael and April.
Oh, no.
They're firing at somebody.
Hurry, April.
You almost got it.
[ropes creaking.]
You did it! Now me! And me.
[knocking.]
Yeah? What do you want? [imitating Mad Dog.]
It's me, you bum.
Let me out of here.
But boss, we thought you were flying this chopper.
No, but you two are gonna be flying! Now let's stop those cannons.
I don't know how much longer we can dodge those laser cannons.
Wait a minute.
There's Raphael.
He's telling us to close in on 'em.
Here we go! Peek-a-boo.
Hey! You're all through! Hey! How'd you snoops get loose? Well, I never give away professional ninja secrets.
Now set this thing down, McMutt.
[chuckles.]
And how you gonna make me, wise guy? That's how! Back off, Turtle.
We got the drop on you.
You guys should have quit while you were losing.
[laser firing.]
Hey, we're goin' down.
We're going to crash? Well put.
[laughs wildly.]
[Women screaming.]
[sighs.]
We made it.
We're safe.
We may have made it, but we aren't safe.
Inside, you boneheads.
Come on, Fritz, Waldo.
We'll pull the caper of the century yet.
A Turtle getting nabbed by a dog.
The S.
P.
C.
A is gonna hear about this.
Turtles, fight with honor! Cowabunga! Come on.
Hurry up, you mugs.
My trigger finger's gettin' itchy.
[gasps.]
You beast! You'd actually steal a priceless dinosaur skeleton? [laughs.]
You bet! Bones like this only come along once in a million years.
Why you low-down hound dog.
How could you destroy public property like that? Ow! [howling.]
Yeah! Way to go, Irma! I don't believe it.
I actually did something right.
Yeah, well, it's the last thing you're ever gonna do, 'cause you're all headed for that big pound in the sky.
Oh! That does it! I'll take care of this.
Hey-ya! Hey-ya! Hey, what's goin' on? You are [yelling.]
on a trip to the penitentiary.
[growls.]
Whoa! [grunts.]
Hey, hey, help me! Let me out of here! April, where did you learn those ridiculous ninja moves? Hey, if you're in enough of these episodes, some of it's bound to rub off.
[laughs.]
Yeah, some of it.
Are you guys all right? Oh, they're better off than the dinosaurs.
No contest, amigo.
The dinosaurs have been dead for millions of years.
Outstanding job, compadre.
Hey, it wasn't just me.
April and Irma deserve the credit, too.
They helped capture McMutt intheir own way.
Uh, McMutt? Who's McMutt? My name's Raphael.
Oh, no, not again.
[April.]
And that concludes our exclusive videotape of the capture of Mad Dog McMutt.
This is April O'Neil, signing off.
Thanks, fellas.
Oh, don't mention it, dudette.
What was the thanks for? Well, because of that story, Burne Thompson signed April to a brand new three-year contract.
Truly a satisfactory conclusion.
But why is Raphael not here to share this happy occasion? He's decided to give up private investigation, Master Splinter.
Yeah.
Now the dude is taking up chemistry.
Excellent.
The study will open up many new doors for him.
[screams, groans.]
It'll open up a couple of walls, too.
[theme.]