The 13 Ghosts of Scooby-Doo (1985) s01e09 Episode Script

It's a Wonderful Scoob

There's trouble in the stars I know it's sad but true Our gang may bag a ghost or two But they may lose Scooby-Doo Uncle Scooby, how big's the biggest ghostie you ever caught? - Hmm, oh, about - Hey! That's our star there, Scooby-Doo.
The villain he's about to meet may change his life forever.
Excuse me.
Hey, Mr.
VanGhoul's on the line.
What's up, Vince? Time Slime, one of our 13 ghosts, is using a Time Scepter to speed up time.
Like, can he speed up dinner so it's right after our lunch? Hold your tongue, Shaggy.
This is serious.
Okay, I'll hold my tongue.
If Time Slime isn't stopped, the world as we know it will end.
Isn't Time Slime just the creepiest, Bogel? Oh, for sure, Weerd.
I could just die and go to heaven, ha, ha, if I wasn't already a ghost.
Be quiet, you morons.
It's time for me to create a little havoc and send this slimy planet into the future.
Ooh! I like it, I like it, Time Slime.
I like it.
But let's make time go faster, much faster.
I told you, don't bother me when I'm working.
Shh! Quiet.
He's working.
Now to take care of Scooby-Doo and friends.
Like, who put the van into fast-forward? The brakes don't work.
- What gives? - The clock's gone nuts.
- Shaggy, look out! - Zoinks! Yikes! This is a warning to all living mortals that whosoever opens this chest of demons will release 13 of the most terrifying ghosts upon the face of the earth.
Yikes! - Let's get them, Bogel.
- I'm with you, Weerd.
Only you can return the demons to the chest.
Why us? Because you let them out.
Phew! Scooby, do something.
See? Like, there's nothing to worry about.
Allow me to rephrase my last statement: Help! - Good work, Scooby.
- Whee! "Welcome to Cuckoosberg.
We'll clean your clock in no time.
" Hey, Mr.
VanGhoul is calling again.
Time Slime's hideout, the Lair of Lost Time, is near your present location.
Like, there goes the neighborhood.
So, uh, what's this Slime's plan, Vince? To speed up time to the day when he can conquer the world.
- Conquer the world? Oh, is that all? - That's enough.
This place has more ticks than a dog.
- Let's not get personal, Flim Flam.
- Oh, ha, ha, right.
- Sorry, Scrappy.
- Look at the sun.
Like, time sure flies when you're having sun.
Get it, Scoob? Sun? Nuh-uh! We gotta find this creep.
Now, let's split up and meet back here in an hour.
Okay, we're back.
That's funny, this grandfather clock isn't moving at all.
Whoa! - Where are we? - The Lair of Lost Time.
I've been expecting you.
- It's Time Slime.
- Time Slime? Oh, no.
Now I want your Chest of Demons.
- Chest of what? - The Chest of Demons.
Uh, is that a box about yay big and about this wide with a carved skull on the lid? - Do you mean that Chest of Demons? - Yes.
- Never heard of it.
- I want that chest.
I'd better get the kids out of there.
Crystal ball, I chant this rhyme Transport our gang from the Lair of Time Shaggy? Daphne? Scrappy? Help! Scooby-Doo, where are you? - Like, Scooby missed the bus.
- He must still be back with Time Slime.
Crystal ball of mine, be true Transport to safety Scooby-Doo Argh! Oh, no.
The Time Scepter is throwing off the transport.
It's sending Scooby into the past.
- Whose past? - Scooby's past.
- Mr.
Doo, it's a boy.
- A boy? It's a boy.
Here, have a dog biscuit.
Oh, oh! Yuck! Ew! Oh, Dada, isn't our little baby Doo beautiful? Scooby-Doo.
And that's what we'll call him: Scooby-Doo.
Scooby shifted the Time Scepter's controls.
Now he's speeding towards the present.
Shaggy? Daphne? Scrappy? Flim Flam? My gosh, it's me.
Oh, no, not that.
No! No! No! No more, no more, no more.
Activate crystal transporter now.
Welcome back, Uncle Scooby.
No! No more, no more, no more! - No more what, Scoob? - No more ghosts and monsters.
I can't stand it.
I've had enough.
Scooby, what are you trying to say? - I quit.
- You quit? Ha, ha.
Zoinks! Scooby, wait.
You can't quit the gang.
We still have a whole bunch of ghosties to catch.
Not me.
I'm leaving.
Goodbye and good luck.
That dopey dog took the Time Scepter.
And if we don't find it, Time Slime will vaporize us.
Start searching, Bogel.
Nope, it's not under the bed.
Maybe it's in the closet.
Oh, face it, Weerd, we're washouts.
Ghosts! There's no ghosts, dear.
You're scared over nothing.
Yikes! Hello? No, Shaggy, I'm afraid Scooby's unable to come to the phone.
No more ghosts and monsters.
But tell him the gang needs him, Mrs.
Time Slime's not gonna bother us anymore now that we have his Time Scepter.
Sorry, Shaggy, but Scooby's ghost-chasing days are over.
Okay, Mrs.
- Well? - Scooby's not coming back.
And that's final.
But Uncle Scooby's the bravest ghost-chasing dog on earth.
What'll we do without him? There's only one thing to do, Scrappy, my man.
We'll just have to find a replacement.
Replace Uncle Scooby? Impossible.
Hey, I know, but we gotta try.
Just leave everything to me.
Oh, what a turnout.
Every dog in town is applying for Scooby's ghost-hunting job.
But we still haven't found one who can fill Scooby's shoes.
Trust me, Daphne.
- Have I ever steered you wrong? - Yes.
Who's next? Calling our next applicant, Bone Crusher Bigelow.
Ha, ha, actually, Bone Crusher, you're not quite what we had in mind.
Uh, we're looking for the mild-mannered type.
Uh, excuse me, but, uh, is this where the St.
Bernards Dog Chorus is having glee-club practice this afternoon? Afraid not.
Oh, heh, I must've got my directions confused.
Don't move a muscle.
That dopey voice, that vague expression, that slouching posture.
You're perfect.
What's your name? Uh-uh-uh Bernie Gumsher.
Bernie, I'm gonna make you a ghost-chasing superstar.
Just sign your John Hancock on the dotted line.
But my name's not John Hancock.
It's, uh, Bernie Gumsher, uh, I think.
Flim Flam, are you crazy? Bone Crusher Bigelow would be better than him.
- I don't know about that.
- Ah! Trust me, guys.
I have an instinct for this stuff.
Bernie's perfect.
He's exciting.
He's new.
He's now.
He's a four-legged, ghost-chasing dynamo.
Am I right, Bernie? The 13 Ghosts of Scooby-Doo, starring Bernie Gumsher.
Time to splat another ghostie.
Are you ready for action, Uncle Bernie? Oh! But just wait till he faces off with Time Slime.
You'll see.
Bernie will be a dynamo.
This is the worst.
Where's the real Scooby-Doo? Unh! Scooby's not on anymore.
I think I'll go to my room and stare at the ceiling.
Extra, extra.
Read all about it.
Fans want real Scooby back.
Scooby-Doo, where are you? Children across America have stopped going to school, stopped eating they've even stopped watching television.
That is, until the real Scooby-Doo returns to action.
We now go to Washington, D.
C where the president is about to make an announcement on this crisis.
Well, I know how difficult ghost-chasing must be, Scooby.
But if you're out there listening, Scooby-Doo, America needs you.
From sea to shining sea This concludes our special report.
We now return to The 13 Ghosts of Scooby-Doo starring Bernie Gumsher, already in progress.
Oh, Time Slime, look, some new dog has replaced Scooby-Doo.
And he's stupider than the first one, if that's possible.
With the real Scooby-Doo out of the way I'll get back my Time Scepter and destroy those kids for good.
Ooh, ooh, ooh! How soon do we start, boss? There's no time like the present.
Yo, Bernie.
Wake up.
I just love the flashy entrance.
Yikes! Playtime is over.
I want my scepter and the Chest of Demons now.
We don't have your scepter, honest.
Vincent VanGhoul has it.
Then give me the chest, or I'll pulverize you.
Duh! Excuse me, but, uh, getting pulverized, uh, isn't in my contract.
Uh, sorry, Bernie, but you didn't read the fine print.
Uh-oh! No chest from you, then no mercy from me.
Okay, guys, it's time for plan 39 red.
Plan 39 red.
Let's go.
Or is it plan 39 blue? Boy, if my Uncle Scooby was here, why, he'd show you a thing or three.
But he's not.
And now that you've given me the demon chest I'd like to give you something in return: the Killer Clock.
Like, why do you call it the Killer Clock, sir? Hickory dickory dock You're in for quite a shock The clock strikes 2 The knight strikes you Hickory dickory dock Sorry I asked.
I don't think the role of Scooby-Doo is a good career move for me right now.
Oh, put a lid on it, Bernie.
I see it's almost time to open the Chest of Demons.
Good knight.
I've gotta get those kids out of there.
Drat this crystal.
The transporter mechanism is jammed again.
- It looks like this is it, gang.
- It would take a miracle to save us now.
My fellow ghosts and ghouls, be free.
That's it.
I'll use the Time Scepter to freeze time.
And not a moment too soon.
Now I think it's high time to pay a visit to Scooby-Doo.
- Mr.
VanGhoul? - Yes, Scooby, it's me.
There's something I want to show you.
- What is it? - The future.
Scooby, after you quit the gang the Chest of Demons fell into Time Slime's clutches.
That's awful.
Uh, what happened? Time Slime opened the chest, and the demons escaped.
Less than 10 years later, the whole world turned into this.
- Oh, no.
- Oh, yes.
Thanks to Time Slime, Earth has become a mechanical wasteland.
Slime, Slime, Slime, Slime Time Slime, Slime, Slime Slime, Slime, Slime, Slime Time Slime, Slime, Slime Slime, Slime, Slime, Slime Time Slime, Slime, Slime Slime, Slime, Slime, Slime Time Slime, Slime, Slime Yikes! Time Slime Slimety Slime, Slime All hail to Time Slime The Slime of all time Slime, Slime, Slime Slime, Slime, Slime Time Slime Slimety Slime, Slime All hail to Time Slime The king of time Slime, Slime, Slime Slime, Slime, Slime, Slime Hey, you and the old man are trespassing.
- This is our territory.
- Oh, no, it can't be.
Yes, Scooby, it's Flim Flam and Scrappy.
Flim Flam, don't you remember me? Flim Flam? That name's history.
I'm Slimex now, leader of the pack.
Scrappy, uh, it's me, your Uncle Scooby.
I had an Uncle Scooby once.
I thought he was a hero, but then that lousy chicken abandoned me.
Now Time Slime's my hero.
- Oh, no.
- Oh, yeah.
Okay, Cycle Slimers, let's make them eat some tire treads.
Where are we now? Time Slime's Lair of Lost Time.
Slime, Slime, Slime, Slime Time Slime, Slime, Slime Slime, Slime, Slime, Slime Time Slime, Slime, Slime Yes, Scooby, it's Daphne.
Now she is Time Slime's slave.
Oh, no.
Who is it? Who's there? It's me, Scooby-Doo.
It can't be.
But it is.
Scooby, you've come back.
Oh, I'm so happy to see you, Scooby.
I do hope you'll stay.
You'll just love working for Time Slime.
- Time Slime? - Yes.
Time Slime.
Slime, Slime, Slime.
Oh, Daphne, this is awful.
This is creepy.
Very creepy, Scooby.
And this is where your old best friend is living now.
So nice of you to come.
Two for dinner? Right this way, please.
- Oh, my gosh.
It's Shaggy.
- "Raggy" is right.
These are the latest fashion rags for spring, designed for you crazy gals on the go.
Here comes another one.
What's wrong with Shaggy? Shaggy's been waiting 10 years for you to return, Scooby.
And after all that waiting, I'm afraid he's gone bananas.
Oh, ha-ha-ha.
I've got bananas.
Lots and lots of bananas.
Bananas by the bushel.
Charming bananas with plenty of appeal.
" Bananas.
But, Shaggy, it's me, Scooby-Doo.
Ah! So you've heard of him too.
What a dog.
I mean, a total bow-wow.
Can we talk? Rumor has it that Scooby-Doo's coming back to save us all from Time Slime, don't you know? I just hope I'll have time to shampoo my hair before he gets here.
Say, don't I know you? Shaggy, I'm Scooby-Doo.
Yeah, that's what they all say, see? You dirty rats, you want me to tell you where Scooby-Doo is.
But I ain't no snitcher, no stool pigeon, see? They can't make Rocky squeal.
Come and get me, coppers.
Oh, oh, look, Time Slime, we've found the last rebel on earth.
It's that kid named Shaggy.
Cycle Slimers, destroy the rebel.
Destroy the rebel.
Abandon ship.
Women and cowards first.
Typhoon Mary is about to hit.
Yikes! Run, Shaggy! The captain must go down with the ship.
You may defeat me, Time Slime but mark my words, one day, Scooby-Doo will return.
I hope.
Scooby-Doo, where are you? Poor Shaggy.
You see, Scooby, you were very important to the gang.
When you quit, everything went wrong.
Time Slime opened the demon chest, and the world was never the same.
Help me, Mr.
I don't wanna quit.
You don't wanna quit? You mean you want to rejoin the gang? Yes, yes, yes.
Well, it may be too late, unless I can put you back into the past.
To the moment before Time Slime opened the chest.
Please, anything.
- It looks like this is it, gang.
- It would take a miracle to save us now.
Scooby, you're back.
It's too late, Scooby-Doo.
Even you can't stop me now.
Oh, yes, I can.
Scooby Snacks.
Scooby, hurry.
Not us.
We're on your side.
We struck out again, Weerd.
Let's hit the showers, Bogel.
Fellow demons, be free.
No, you fool.
Get back to your clock.
No! Hurray! Well, Bernie, now that Scooby's back it looks like we won't be needing your services after all.
Uh, thank goodness.
But your acting career's not over, Bernie, baby.
As your agent, I can make you a major star overnight.
First, we'll get on the talk shows, maybe a gig in Vegas then send you on the supper-club circuit.
What do you say, Bernie? Ha, ha.
Sound exciting, huh? Huh? He's excited.
Trust me.
Well, Scoob, old buddy, old pal, old friend, you saved the day.
Not to mention the world.
That's my brave Uncle Scooby.
Oh, Shucks! Like, who knows what might've happened to the world if Time Slime had won? Who knows? So farewell for now from our happy crew - And from The 13 Ghosts - Of Scooby-Dooby-Doo.