The Affair (2014) s05e03 Episode Script

Season 5, Episode 3

1 [Noah.]
Previously on The Affair Author of the best-selling novel, Descent, soon to be made into a major motion picture, Noah Solloway.
People know my movies, and they see me as this, um, you know, this action hero, this sort of modern-day James Bond.
But that's all an act, of course.
I mean, that's not who I am.
But this book, this is me.
So what's your plan to make money? Ugh, I don't know.
His visa's about to expire, so no one will hire him.
I just wanted to say I think it's so awesome that you're my dad's girlfriend.
Can I trouble you for another drink? [scoffs.]
Of course.
Coming right up.
There's something wrong with him.
He's losing his memory.
He thinks I'm still married to Helen.
He thinks I own this place.
I need to leave.
Come in.
Vik, this is your son.
This is Eddie.
[Eddie coos softly.]
Are you with the studio? [scoffs.]
S-So you're Helen.
I lost my partner a few months ago.
Oh, my God.
Just breathe.
- I lost someone, too.
- [Paul.]
Where are you gonna stay? Dad's place.
Is that a good idea? I was screaming into the canyon At the moment of my death The echo I created Outlasted my last breath My voice it made an avalanche And buried a man I never knew And when he died, his widowed bride Met your daddy and they made you I have only one thing to do And that's be the wave that I am, and then Sink back into the ocean I have only one thing to do And that's be the wave that I am, and then Sink back into the ocean I have only one thing to do And that's be the wave that I am, and then Sink back into the ocean, sink back into the ocean Sink back into the o Sink back into the ocean Sink back into the o Sink back into the ocean Sink back into the ocean - - [school bell ringing.]
The early reviews are really good.
So I hear.
I, uh, I try not to pay attention to those things.
I have to admit, I wasn't such a fan of Descent, although, clearly, the book didn't suffer from lack of fans, but The Autobiography of Jack Hunter, it really moved me.
It's a much more vulnerable, mature piece of writing.
I mean, I I wrote it in prison partly just to, uh, keep myself from going insane.
So just to get it published at all is gratifying, and You were in prison for killing your brother-in-law, right? Uh, my, uh, ex-wife's brother-in-law, yeah.
But there's plenty of stuff out there about that.
I-I really don't want to - make this about - No, no, no.
It's just ten years ago you were a public school teacher living in Brooklyn, and then one summer, you wrote a novel that was an overnight sensation.
You left your wife and family, you married your mistress, you became suddenly famous and I don't know, let's say you drank a little bit of your own Kool-Aid.
You became increasingly arrogant, self-absorbed, reckless, until one fateful night on the dark roads of Montauk, you hit someone and fled the scene of the crime I'm going somewhere with this.
I hope so.
You had an enormous fall from grace.
You went to prison, you served time, you lost everything.
And now you're out, you've gone back to teaching underprivileged kids, you have moved to be closer to your family.
You seem to be living a quiet life now.
You've come full circle.
So would you say that the redemption of Noah Solloway is complete? [chuckles softly.]
Um Uh, y-you read the book, y-you tell me.
That seems like a perfect place to stop.
I'm really excited about this piece.
People love a comeback story.
When will they run it, do you know? Well, it's not up to me, but, um, they're hoping to time it with the release of your movie.
Your book is coming out around then, too, isn't it? That's right.
It's quite a year you're having.
Oh, um, one more thing.
Are you seeing anyone? Our readers will want to know.
Uh no.
No, not at the moment.
Really? That surprises me.
Yeah, well, I guess that's, uh, that's one piece of the puzzle I haven't quite figured out yet.
There's still time.
Oh, I should probably turn this off.
You still use those things? I thought young reporters these days just used their iPhone.
Well, I'm not that young, and the batteries on these things last longer.
The last time I saw one, I was interviewing a friend in Freshman Psych.
Oh, you know, speaking of friends, could I call some of them? You know, to round out the picture? Who is Noah Solloway, the man? - Uh, sure.
Of course.
- [door closes.]
I can do that.
I can talk for the article.
You're Petra Ranes.
I love your work.
I-I read everything you write.
Oh, thanks.
Uh, who are you? I'm the principal, actually.
Of this, uh, school.
But we're also friends.
And I'm a novelist, too, so we have that whole - simpatico thing going, and - You know what? I-I'll, uh, I'll think of a couple of names - and get back to you.
- Great.
Thank you for your time.
Thank you.
Vanity Fair? Wow.
This is gonna be big for you.
- We'll see.
- I mean, this is top-tier literary recognition.
That's rarified air.
You want to go out? Celebrate tonight? Talk about our craft? Uh, no.
I got to, um, I got to have dinner with my daughter, and then I'm gonna be on set till-till late, so "I'm gonna be on set.
" Jesus, man.
Who are you? It's okay, I stay up late.
I'll call you.
I mean, I got to buy a beer for the man who has it all.
[indistinct chatter.]
[soft piano music playing.]
Is Colin coming, - or should we just order? - Uh, no.
He'll be here.
He just When he works, he can get carried away, lose track of time.
I can't believe you're getting married.
I know.
Me either.
You okay? Yeah, I'm fine.
- How's work? - Work's fine.
Is something wrong? I don't want to pry, but you seem kind of, - I don't know.
- I'm just tired, Dad.
I-I have to be at the gallery by seven every morning.
We don't have air conditioning 'cause Andrea's too cheap.
It's hot as hell and, you know, I'm doing everything: I-I hang the art, I man the phones, I keep the books.
All she does is check her Raya profile and freak out.
What's a? Never mind.
So you don't like this job? I mean, it beats copy editing Art Forum.
Well, maybe you could find another gallery where the boss is a little more reasonable.
I can't quit.
We need the money.
Colin still can't work 'cause of his visa situation, so Well, would it help if I gave you the money, - just to - Oh, no.
Thanks, Dad.
That's-that's not it.
It's just that like, when I come home from a long day of work and I just want to, you know, have a glass of wine and watch The Kardashians, I can't because Colin's all over me to study.
- Study? - Yeah, for his immigration interview.
You know, they put us in separate rooms, and if we don't get every single question perfectly, Colin doesn't get his citizenship.
Oh, hold on, hold on.
Thank you.
What? You remind me of your mother.
Because I'm an alcoholic? No.
'Cause you're so beautiful.
Whitney this marriage thing, you don't have to do it, you know.
It seems rushed.
Yeah, but actually, Dad, I do, because if I don't, then Colin has to leave the country.
Well, not forever, right? I mean, maybe that's for the best.
He can go home, he can establish himself there, and then apply for citizenship on his own merit.
What are you talking about? I'm not gonna let him get deported.
I-I love him.
I just I don't think it's supposed to be this hard, Whitney.
You are so young.
It's too early to be this hard.
I don't know if you remember, Mr.
Big Shot, but you were a struggling artist once, too.
Mom didn't leave you.
I mean, you left her 20 years later, but Whitney, I I had a job.
I was a teacher.
I never let your mother support me.
Look, I'm not saying - he's not a good guy - [Colin.]
- Sorry, Mr.
- Hi.
- Whit.
How you doing? - Hi.
I got a bit lost in the work.
Have we ordered? No.
Here you go.
Oh, thanks.
Do they do vegan? [phone ringing.]
- Hi.
- [Janelle.]
Long time.
Um I know.
At least a month, right? It's three, actually.
Has it been three months? Wow.
Time really does fly when you're busy.
Why are you calling, Janelle? I feel badly about the way things ended between us.
You mean, when you disappeared after my ex-wife's boyfriend's funeral and then never returned my calls? Yes.
I'd actually like to explain some things in person.
Are you free tonight? Uh it'd have to be pretty late.
I don't mind waiting up.
What am I gonna do? I can't stop thinking about you.
I like you.
I like everything about you.
I could be wanted in four states.
- Helen.
- Shh! [Pru.]
I'll take my chances.
We don't know anything about each other.
I am never gonna leave my wife.
I don't expect you to.
And she can never find out.
I understand.
You still want to do this? [Pru.]
And cut.
- [woman.]
All right.
- Wasn't that great? - [indistinct chatter.]
- They're so great together.
Wh-Why are you here? - You come You looking for me? - Oh Oh, no.
Uh, I might have a sort of a work opportunity here.
What? On the movie? No-no-no-no-no, just through people connected with the movie.
I don't want to say too much about it, in case it doesn't happen.
How was dinner with, uh, Colin and Whitney? It was fine.
She looks kind of exhausted, though, don't you think? I mean, burning the candle at both ends.
Well, she's trying to climb the ladder.
Hate seeing her like this.
Actually, I think, for the first time in her life, she's acting like an adult.
But if you want to freak out about something, you can freak out about the fact that she wants to get married at my parents' house, and, uh, they're trying to sell it.
Wait, your parents are selling? - That's what I hear.
- Why? I don't know.
I can't get a straight answer out of my mother.
Like, my father made some bad business investments, which really doesn't sound like him.
- So I'm - Helen.
- I don't really know.
- Helen.
About your father [Sasha.]
Just the man I need to see.
Noah Solloway, quick word? Sure.
Walk with me.
Don't go anywhere.
Uh, I'm here.
I just think we need to make some decisions, Noah, about who this character really is.
In that last scene, Daniel tells Lana that he's never gonna leave his wife.
Okay? Now, does he say that because he's a fundamentally good man who's trying to be honest about what he has to give her? Or does he say that as some sort of manipulation, so that she will think whatever happens next is actually her own fault? I mean the first one.
Because what I just did now, I shot it both ways so I can decide in editing, but I'm not gonna shoot the whole fucking movie like that.
I want to stop doing that tomorrow.
And I know what I think is more interesting, but, I mean, you're the writer.
Well, I mean, he's a, he's a, he's a good man.
He's-he's a family man.
He's never done anything like this before, and he's-he's just swept up in something beyond his control.
Which reminds me, we haven't talked about the ending.
What about it? I think it might be worth revisiting.
I mean, it's, it's all connected, you see.
What ending would you like? What if he went back to his wife? Why would he do that? If he's undone, as you say, by transgression He can't just [chuckling.]
go back to his wife.
That's the whole point.
He-He's-he's destroyed everything.
It's Butch Cassidy, it's Thelma & Louise.
He can't go back, he's he has to keep going further, until there's nowhere left to go.
Oh, my God, you're just such a moralist, aren't you? I mean everyone has to pay for their crimes.
It's so puritanical and so adorably American.
Listen, if it's too much of a left turn, I totally understand.
I mean, you've been thinking of this one way - for a very, very long time.
- Okay, good.
So you don't mind if I take a pass myself? With the script? Just the scenes for tomorrow.
No, that-that's - that's my job.
- Yes, it is.
So you'll do it? Well, I think it works as it is.
You do? Uh Okay, I'll take another look.
That's why it's so fucking great to have the writer on set.
They're usually never here.
And now, if you'll excuse me, I have to go and get undressed and have some sex.
[indistinct chatter.]
Oh, hi.
Me again.
Erica, script supervisor.
Uh, in the sex scene, how important is the exact wording? You have scripted all the "oh, Gods" and the "yeses," but actors don't always stick to that, so ca-can they wing it, or? Yeah.
I mean, I I-I don't know.
It's not especially clear.
Uh, they can they can do what they what they want.
[hypnotic, suspenseful music.]
Um, listen up, people.
Um it's been a long day, and we're now down to a skeleton crew for this final, intimate scene.
So, as a thank you to all you stalwarts who've been here since, like, 6 a.
this morning, I'm taking you out tonight for karaoke and drinks.
- [whoops.]
- [crew cheering.]
All right, let's shoot some sex.
Can I have my glasses, please? Thank you.
Listen, I got an idea to save your parents' place.
- You do? - Yeah.
How about we move back east? What what do you mean? Well, you came to L.
for Vik, I came for the kids.
Neither of us really like it here.
Why don't you sell your house in the hills and use the money to buy your parents' place? I'm not moving back east.
Why not? Well, because Trevor and Stacey are in school here, and they have friends, and they're doing really well, and I actually I'm kind of starting to like L.
But I thought you hated it.
What changed? Can I get everyone's attention? Next up is love scene.
Love scene equals a closed set.
So if you're not essential personnel, I'm gonna need you to leave.
Did you drive here? - You need a ride home? - I'm staying.
But you can't stay.
It's the last scene of the day.
- You're not allowed to watch.
- Yeah, but didn't you hear? Sasha's taking everyone out to karaoke after.
That sounds fun.
First team's landed! [hypnotic, suspenseful music.]
[bell ringing.]
Okay, this is a closed set.
No, it's not.
I got to get Fuck.
- Hey.
- Oh, my God! [woman.]
Hold the roll! Is something wrong, man? You're really not supposed to be in here.
No, it's nothing.
It's just, um, uh, your accent in that last scene - Yeah.
- Just sounded a little British.
- No, it didn't.
- It did.
I thought it did.
- Well, it didn't.
Get out.
- I thought it did.
- Get the fuck out.
- Okay.
Sorry, thanks.
Noah, you came.
Uh Oh, that's sweet, but I have an early morning.
What's going on? I'm, uh I'm running for school board.
Really? Yup.
If the system won't change for me, I'm gonna change the system.
Oh, good.
You came.
Hey, so we're all set for the appearance at First Baptist tomorrow.
I should go home, shower, change my shirt.
Give you two - time to talk.
- [Janelle chuckles.]
Thank you for everything.
Ah, of course.
Don't wait up.
- [Janelle chuckles.]
- We gonna win this thing? - [all.]
Yeah! - [laughs.]
Damn right.
Good to see you.
[door opens.]
I'll make us some tea.
[spoon clinking in cup.]
So, you and Carl? Yeah, we're back together.
I can see that.
How's that working out? It's wonderful.
I'm really happy.
Good for you.
Is that why you wanted to talk to me? No.
Of course not.
Please sit.
So [clears throat.]
Carl and I were talking, and, uh, he's really got such a brilliant mind for this stuff.
And we realized, in running for the board, I'm running on my record as a tough, principled educator and administrator.
Thing is it's important that that record not get muddied.
What, you mean you and me? As my campaign manager, Carl just he-he doesn't love the optics around our relationship, given that I was your boss.
So that's why you finally call me? To make sure I never tell anyone that we were together? I feel like this is upsetting you.
You didn't return my calls for three months, Janelle.
After everything we went through, you don't think I deserve some kind of explanation? I didn't I didn't know what to say.
Well, you're a fucking adult, aren't you? I mean, you couldn't figure it out? I don't appreciate that language.
- Oh, Jesus Christ.
- Noah, get a grip.
I thought you fucking hated each other.
You could barely be in the same room.
- Things change.
- That's such bullshit.
Okay, how about this? I don't actually think I owe you an explanation.
We dated for a while, it didn't work out.
And now all I'm asking is that you keep your mouth shut so that I can have a chance to win this campaign and make a real difference in the lives of the children you purport to care so much about.
Okay? Sure.
Good luck with the campaign.
- Thanks for the tea.
- [sighs.]
Noah, wait.
I'm sorry.
I didn't mean to hurt you.
It's just that Carl and I have a history.
A child, a whole life.
Yeah, and you broke up 'cause he cheated on you.
What makes you think this time is gonna be any different? Because we're different people now.
Look, I think when I was young, I I fell in love with his potential.
But now that I've lived a while, I've learned to love him for who he actually is.
[car horn blaring in distance.]
[Bruce Springsteen's "Tougher than the Rest" playing.]
[indistinct crowd chatter.]
I been watching you a while Maybe you've been watching me, too So somebody ran out And left your heart in a mess But if you're looking for love Honey, I'm tougher Than the rest Hey! Oh, hi! Isn't he funny? Or some good-lookin' Joe He's a terrible singer.
Yeah, it's horrifying.
On their arm, some girl like a sweet-talkin' Romeo Hey, is there something you want to tell me? What? About what? Oh, my God, you're here! - Hi.
- Hi.
- Hi, how are you? - I'm good now.
So if you're rough enough for love Honey, I'm tougher than the rest The road is dark And it's a thin Thin line But I want you [woman.]
Are ringing For me and my gal - What the hell? - Oh, this.
Uh this is just vitamin B.
- What are you doing, man? - Trying to fight a cold.
- With Helen.
- What do you mean? She just lost someone, okay? - She's in a very fragile place.
- [stall door opens.]
So I think it'd be the better part of valor You're Sasha Mann.
Yeah, last time I checked.
Think I could get a picture? [Sasha.]
Why don't we do this? Why don't you and I share a real moment where we sort of really see each other, hmm? How does that sound? [clicks.]
- Thanks.
- Thank you.
- Look, Sasha - You're very competitive, aren't you? Territorial.
About women especially.
I saw it that morning in the café.
I'm not territorial.
I care about her.
She's the mother of my children.
- She's my best friend.
- [stall door opens.]
Whom you lied to, cheated on, and left.
Yet I'm the one she needs to be protected from.
Look, it's more complicated than that.
See, this is why you don't understand the character.
What? What does that mean? Noah, you can't see yourself, and you never could, and that's why you never get what you want.
Now, are you going to let me leave the men's room, or are we going to have a problem? [door opens.]
[Liz Phair's "Divorce Song" playing.]
You put in my hands A loaded gun and then told me not to fire it When you did the things you said were up to me And then accused me of trying to fuck it up But you've never been a waste of my time It's never been a drag So take a deep breath and count back from ten And maybe you'll be all right And the license said you had to stick around Until I was dead But if you're tired of looking at my face I guess I already am But you've never been a If you come and be My sweet baby, mine Because I [crowd whooping.]
Ain't got nobody [woman.]
What? 'Cause nobody cares for me [song ends.]
[applause and cheering.]
[indistinct chatter.]
Okay, Erica.
Erica, you are next.
Here she comes.
All right, Erica.
Let's hear it for Erica.
There you go, sweetheart.
- [laughs.]
Hey, everybody.
- Sorry, man, let me, uh Uh, so this song means a lot to me.
- Sorry, Erica.
Can I? - Oh.
Can I? You don't mind.
Tom Petty, "Listen to Her Heart.
" Okay? Yeah.
- You don't mind, do you? - No, it's fine.
You can go on the next one.
- Sure.
Next time.
- Please.
[Tom Petty's "Listen to Her Heart" playing.]
You think you're gonna take her away With your money and your cocaine Keep thinkin' that her mind is gonna change But I know everything is okay She's gonna listen to her heart [mouthing.]
It's gonna tell her what to do She might need a lot of lovin' But she don't need [groans.]
What the fuck? Feeling better? Oh, my God.
You weren't super specific about what you wanted, so I sort of got one of everything.
What the? How did we? What are we doing here? It was an honor and a privilege to watch you work.
We're like Kerouac and Burroughs.
Who's who, do you think? I mean, obviously you're Kerouac.
But I'll take Burroughs.
I'll take that.
Work? What do you mean, work? You were a surgeon, man.
Wait, what time is it? Like, six.
Haven't stayed up all night since college.
It's invigorating.
- I already paid.
- No, no, it's fine.
See you, man.
Hi, Noah.
So, I'm sorry, but I can't let you on set today.
What are you talking about? I guess Mr.
Mann wants to limit the number of people on set from this point forward.
Just get on your radio thing and call Mr.
Mann and tell him to come talk to me face-to-face.
I can't.
He's shooting.
Yeah, I know.
I-I got a rewrite for the scene he's shooting right now, so I need to get it to him.
Oh, that's okay.
He already has it.
No, he What? No.
Wha What? Yeah, the new pages came out this morning.
They're shooting them right now.
[hypnotic, suspenseful music.]
Okay, you fucking call him.
Call him now.
Call him on the radio now.
Look at me and call Call them on the fucking radio now! Call him now! Fucking call him.
Jesus, this is the fucking rewrite here! Now get him out here! - - [easy listening music playing.]
Excuse me.
This yolk is broken, I'd like to send it back.
Right away, ma'am.
Does this look moldy to you? - The napkin? - You know, I'm very allergic to mold.
What is that right there? Uh, it just looks like ketchup.
Can't have mold in my lap.
I'll break out in hives.
Excuse me.
Excuse me, please.
Mom, is, is everything okay? I'm fine, why? You just seem a little tense.
I'm very worried about you, I wanted to do something nice for you.
Well, this is a very nice place.
- Thank you.
- Do you think so? Shirley Divets said it was the best restaurant in Los Angeles, but she hasn't been out of Hyannis in 30 years, so what does she know? Excuse me.
How's Dad? Why do you ask? Um because I know he doesn't usually like it when you're away.
And you've been here for a while, so I'm just wondering how he's doing.
[exhales sharply.]
That's actually something I wanted to discuss with you.
I think it's time I go home.
Well, I mean, if you think it's time.
I hate the idea of leaving you here alone in this extraordinarily vulnerable state.
Actually, I've been feeling a little bit better lately.
- So - But your father has dementia.
What? And he's lost all our money.
- What? - Excuse me.
- What? - Ma'am? This napkin is covered in mold.
I'd like another.
A clean one.
Of course, ma'am.
I'm going to have a talk with Shirley Divets when I get back.
Tell her she's too old to be making recommendations.
She thinks, just because she slept with Warren Beatty in '67, she's an authority on every [stammers.]
No, no, no, stop, stop, stop.
What Okay.
What, what do you mean Dad has dementia? - Alzheimer's, darling, I think.
- Well, how do you know? He gets confused, he forgets things.
- So do I.
- It's not the same thing.
The other day, he couldn't find his keys.
So what? I can never find my car keys.
They were in his hand, Helen.
It's just he didn't know what they were.
He didn't know what they were for.
Uh, how long has this been going on? For a while.
About a year.
And you didn't tell me? You had a lot of things to worry about.
Oh, my God, it never ends.
I know.
It feels like that sometimes, doesn't it? And w-wait, who is with him now? - Is he alone? - Of course not, Helen.
We have a live-in nurse.
Norene, and she's lovely.
And she's very expensive, I can't afford her.
That's why I have to move back.
And, okay, what do you mean he lost all of your money? He gave a lot of it away to charity, which should have been my first clue there was something seriously wrong.
And he made some idiotic investments.
It's not all gone, mind you.
We just have to be careful.
If worst comes to worst, we can sell the house.
Oh, my God.
Sell the house? I don't want to, either.
But he needs a lot of care and I can't manage it on my own.
The money has to come from somewhere.
Unless Oh, if you're asking me for money, I don't have any.
Vik left everything to his parents.
Helen, I'm not asking you for money.
I'm asking you to move back east and help me take care of him.
It'd be a way to keep the house.
No, but I the kids the kids are in, are in school here.
There are schools on Long Island.
Yes, but they've only been here a few years.
And to move them back this soon would just be unfair.
Life isn't fair.
The sooner they understand that, the less disappointed they'll be.
Just wait.
Your father's dying, Helen.
You give someone the best years of your life while they fuck anything with a hole, and then you finally get them back, and for what? The worst years of theirs.
It's definitely not fair.
But I did get one thing from him.
I got you.
I got my girl.
[somber music.]
[Eddie crying.]
Sierra? He won't eat.
What do you mean? I don't, I don't know what's going on.
I mean, first he would only take my right breast and then only if we were bouncing.
And now not at all.
Eddie? Okay.
Come on.
Here you go, here.
- [crying.]
- [Margaret.]
Why are you trying to assault that baby with your breast? Mom, stop it.
Can I here, can I hold him for a minute? - Yes.
- Okay.
Here you go.
Okay, sweetie.
Oh, he's hungry.
Yeah, I know, so why won't he eat? Um, I don't know.
Uh, did you try a bottle? - Do you have a pump? - No, no, no bottles.
Oh, for God's sakes, give him a bottle.
You're not living in a cave.
My doula said it would create nipple confusion, and then he's gonna reject my breast.
- As he should.
- Okay.
Um, Sierra, he needs to eat.
So, why don't we just get him some formula for now and then we'll, we'll find you a pump.
No, I can't, I can't give him formula.
- Why not? - Because it leads to a lifetime of obesity and eating disorders.
It's better to be plump and civilized - than raised like a wolf cub.
- Okay.
That's really enough from you, okay? [crying continues.]
Sierra, when's the last time you slept? I don't know, I a day ago, two days ago.
- I don't know.
- All right.
Here's what's gonna happen.
You're gonna lie down in Stacey's room and you're gonna go out and get some formula and a bottle.
- No, Helen.
- Yes, Sierra.
One bottle is not gonna do any harm.
He needs to eat and you need to sleep.
So let's just let's just fix these problems right now and then we'll sort out the rest, okay? - [exhales.]
- [Eddie fussing.]
Go, just go ahead; it's right down the hall.
- On your right.
- Okay, thank you.
[Eddie crying.]
You, too.
- That woman is a child.
- I know.
[door opens.]
- Okay.
- [door closes.]
- [cries.]
- Ah-ah-ah, none of that.
- [stops crying.]
- Thank you.
- [babbles.]
- Hmm.
[gentle, hypnotic music.]
Nice work.
You look just like your dad.
[exhales slowly.]
[faint chatter on TV.]
Don't you guys have homework? [Trevor.]
We'll do it later.
[man on TV.]
You have not met him yet.
[man chuckles on TV.]
Is that what you like? What is this, The Maze? The Maze 2.
- This time, it's even more personal.
- [snickers.]
It's um, yeah, the sequel.
- What? - How was your date? - That you went on? - Uh, sorry, you know, he thought putting this on - would make you talk about it.
- With Sasha mother-freaking Mann? I told him it was a dumb idea.
It wasn't really a date, you guys.
What is he like? - Yeah, are you gonna see him again? - Yeah.
When can I start telling people that Sasha Mann - is your boyfriend? - You can't.
And you can't tweet it or blog it - or any of that stuff.
- Don't worry, Mom, he won't.
- It's a vlog.
- Okay.
Anyway, I might be done with boyfriends - for a while.
- [Brooklyn.]
What? Well, I've had my share.
They can be exhausting.
I mean, do what you want, but you are way too hot not to have - any more boyfriends.
- Gross.
- That's my mom.
- I'm serious.
[phone ringing.]
- Hello? - [Sasha.]
[on TV.]
Uh, uh, how's it going, Sasha Mann? What are you doing right now? Uh, I'm at home.
Why? Well, the thing is, uh, ever since you came to my place and-and we spent that evening together, I can't stop thinking about my furniture.
Your furniture? Yeah, I can't get it out of my head.
I think you're right, uh, I need more stuff.
I was hoping you'd come by set and help me make some decisions.
I'm sure you miss it.
- If, if you're not too busy, that is.
- I know you have it on your mind.
You remember how lovely the summers are out there.
- Don't you? - Helen, are you there? Um, I have to deal with something here.
I'll call you back.
They've got a great high school there, Bridgehampton High.
Huge building.
- Very - Can I talk to you for a second? What are you doing? Are you telling him - we're moving? - I'm just laying the groundwork.
Please don't do that.
Helen, you can't uproot them like you did last time.
It's not healthy.
Children have to be prepared for traumatic events.
I think what we should do tonight at dinner is talk about the East Coast in a general kind of way.
You should say how much you miss it.
I'll mention how glorious it is - this time of year.
- I'm going out.
- [knocking.]
- [Sasha.]
Yeah? Come on in.
Oh, you came.
I wasn't sure you would.
Uh, yeah.
I'm sorry, I have things going on.
- I really appreciate you making time.
- Yeah.
Please come on in.
Sit down.
- Um - [sighs.]
So you need some help making some decisions? Yeah, um thing is, I moved to Malibu because I was grieving and I just needed to get away from the world and I thought, if I have nothing, then I'll have nothing to lose, right? But then the other night, uh, after you left, I realized that time in my life is over.
It-It's passed and I don't need to live like a monk anymore to keep order in my head.
I want to feel things again.
So I took you very seriously.
And I hired a professional.
Um supposedly one of the best interior designers in all of Hollywood.
- Um - The trouble is, look.
I really don't like it.
- No, I see what you mean.
- It's totally not - what I expected.
- It's chaotic.
Yes, it is.
- Um - It's too much.
I was thinking just, you know, things with really clean, simple lines, like a modern area rug there, maybe, or, um, or a Noguchi lamp there.
What? I just had the most brilliant idea.
Why don't you do it? What? No.
Well, you know what you like and you obviously have great taste.
Yeah, but I don't I have I don't have I'm my And we'd get to spend a lot of time together.
But why? [chuckles.]
What do you mean, why? I mean, there are tons of women.
I'm sure you have tons of women.
You know, famous women, younger women, taller women that you-you can You're I'm having a very difficult time believing that I'm your type.
Uh, that's probably because you don't have the faintest idea what my type is because you categorically refuse to give me a chance.
[knock on door.]
- Yes? - [woman.]
Mann? - They need you on set.
- Just a second, please.
Um, listen, I'm taking everybody out tonight for karaoke and drinks.
Why don't you come, and we can discuss this Okay.
Really? [laughs.]
[soft, ambient music.]
Oh, um, hi.
I just Actually, it's great you're here.
I was, I was about to call you.
You really need to talk to Whitney about this whole wedding thing.
Um, uh, okay.
What about it? Well, this-this kid, he's-he's- he's using her for a green card.
- He doesn't work, he doesn't - I don't think so.
I mean, I think he loves her.
It's too fast, and she is too young.
And we're her parents.
We need to protect her.
Uh, protect her from what? From making a big mistake.
You want me to tell her to call off her wedding? Yeah.
I think you should.
Why don't you do it? Because she doesn't listen to me.
She listens to you.
- [Lisa.]
Rehearsal's up! - Oh.
Fuck, they need me for rehearsals.
Will you talk to her? Uh yeah, sure.
Okay, thanks.
Thanks for coming.
It's really good of you.
[music playing.]
- [Sasha.]
- Hi.
- Hey.
- You're finished already.
Done for the day.
Um, can we have two negronis, please? And keep it open.
A lot of people coming.
So - So - Have you thought about it? About what? Designing my house.
I can't design - your house, Sasha.
- Why the hell not? Because I have too much going on.
- Like what? - Like what? Yes, like what? Like I just found out my father has Alzheimer's.
- And? - And he's completely ruined - the family's finances.
- Poor you.
My mother is a crazy, narcissistic bitch.
- Big deal.
- And my neighbor - Mm-hmm.
- had a one-night stand with my boyfriend who died.
Sorry, that's not funny.
- No.
- No.
Now she has his baby, and she wants me to take care of it.
And I already have four kids of my own, the oldest of whom is getting married, and Noah wants me to convince her to call off the wedding.
- Why? - Because, I don't know, he doesn't like the guy.
Why doesn't Noah just talk to her himself? Because they don't have that kind of relationship.
Helen, you don't have to set yourself on fire to keep other people warm.
I'm not really sure what that means.
You are allowed to say no.
No, I won't design your house.
Oh, no, no, no, not to me.
- Do you like gin? - No.
- Of course you do.
- [laughs.]
- Cheers.
- Thank you.
Thank you.
Can I ask you a question? Yeah, anything.
Except if I'm in love with you.
That's a secret.
Uh, who did you lose? You said you were grieving.
You really don't know anything about me, do you? Not so much.
You don't read the tabloids? Not since Noah went to prison.
Um, her name was Lily, and she was my fiancée, and, um We met as kids, and we'd come up together.
And, well, my success was awful for her.
I didn't handle it well, and-and she felt abandoned.
And as I started working more, she started using more until, um until she overdosed one day in our car.
And I was the one who found her.
The newspapers reported it as a suicide, so [Noah.]
- Hi.
- Hi.
Good of you to join us.
Yeah, thanks for doing this.
It's a cute idea.
- Something wrong? - Yeah.
Yeah, something is wrong, Sasha.
I just, uh, got a call from my agents.
They said you told the studio that you want to you want to rewrite the script.
That's not exactly what I said, but I actually tried to talk to you about this Yeah, well, you got my fucking attention now, so what's the problem? Do you think we should do this somewhere a bit more private, perhaps? Lead the way, Maestro.
You gonna be all right? Yeah.
- You're the real Helen, right? - Oh, yeah.
And you're banging Sasha? - What? - Well, everybody knows.
Oh You must really hate your ex-husband.
- He seems like such a prick.
- Um Good for you, honey.
Get your revenge.
- Cheers.
- I'm sorry, I have to go.
[slow, melancholy music.]
You're still up? Yeah, I can't sleep.
So, why does Stacey have to sleep with Grandma? Because Sierra and Eddie are in Stacey's room tonight.
Okay, fine.
Do we have any LaCroix? Brooklyn's thirsty.
Check the back? Score.
Brooklyn's staying over? Uh, yeah.
I'm such a cool mom.
You are a cool mom.
No, no, really.
Just between you and me, could have been so much worse.
- Thank you.
- So, how long - is Sierra staying with us? - I don't know.
Grandma? I don't know that, either.
I think they're all gonna stay until they're ready to leave.
Okay, yeah, that's fine.
Then I will be booking an extra session with my therapist.
You don't have a therapist.
Yeah, but I need one.
- Good night, Mom.
- Good night.
[knocking on door.]
[knocking continues.]
What?! - Where is he? - Who? I know he's here.
Where the fuck is he? Sasha! - Oh, God.
- Sasha! Shut up.
You are wasted.
Go home.
Do you want the kids - to see you like this? - He's fucking using you, Helen.
He's using you to get to me.
He's playing me, so he wants to fuck you so he feels closer to me.
Can't you see how pathetic that is? [quiet, atmospheric music.]
It's fucking freezing out here.
Can I just come in? - No.
- Just come on.
- No.
- Seriously.
Go home.
Don't drive.
Take an Uber.
I don't care what you do.
Just go.
Good night.
Helen, come Helen? Helen, I'll call a guy.
- Just let me in.
- [knocking on door.]
Come on, Helen.
Helen, come on! - [snickers.]
- Helen! [line ringing.]
Hello? Hi.
Are you mad? No, not mad.
Um, just confused.
I-I told you the worst thing that ever happened to me, and you just disappeared.
I know.
I'm sorry.
I'm really sorry.
D-Do you want to keep talking? No, not really.
Do you want to do something else? [both moaning.]
- Shh.
- [whispering.]
What? - [whispering.]
Shh, quiet.
- Why? Because I have a house full of people.
Who's here? Um my daughter.
My son.
- His boyfriend.
- [laughs.]
Uh, my mother.
You got the whole family.
- And my neighbor.
- [laughing.]
And her baby.
[both laughing.]
It's okay.
- Helen.
- Hmm? - Design my house.
- [chuckles.]
Give me a lamp.
Just one room, please.
Just one room.
Just one tiny, little room.
Helen, just give me a rug.
Can-can you give me a rug, please? Give me a rug.
Can you give me a? - [Margaret.]
Good morning.
- Morning.
- Coffee? - Sure.
How'd you sleep? Really well, thanks.
I think I can get the kids enrolled in the Bridgehampton high school for the spring semester, so if you put this house on the market next month Mom, I'm not moving back.
What? I have a life here.
I'll help you and Dad out as much as I can, but I-I'm not moving home.
What am I supposed to do? You will figure it out.
What's gotten into you? [Sasha.]
Good morning.
[slow, quiet music.]
- Hey.
- Hi.
You must be Margaret.
I'm Sasha.
- I - Pleasure to meet you.
I'd actually love a cup of coffee, if it's not too much trouble.
Thank you.
[Marcy Playground's "Sex and Candy" playing.]
Like double cherry pie Yeah, there she was Like disco superfly - [children chattering playfully.]
- I smell sex and candy here Who's that lounging in my chair? Who's that [bartender.]
Those your kids? No.
Do I look like the kind of person who would have kids? It isn't a crime.
It should be.
This surely is a dream No, they're just some refugee kids that I met in Senegal.
Oh, yeah? What were you doing out there? I'm a coastal engineer.
How's that going? Not well.
And I had too much caffeine And I was thinkin' 'bout myself [receiver beeps.]
- Have a good one.
- Thanks for the tip, Jim.
In platform double suede Yeah, there she was Can I ask you a question? Shoot.
What's with the electricity out here? Is the grid completely off? No.
Just ever since the last hurricane, they only turn it on between nine and five.
We got our own battery bank, though.
This place used to be so beautiful.
Yeah, well, there aren't enough of us out here to matter anymore.
We can't afford those wind turbines they got out in East Hampton, so Right.
You here for work? I am.
How much do I owe you? It's on the house.
I haven't seen a face like yours out here in a while.
I like it.
[tense music.]
[both moaning.]
- [gasps.]
- What? [Joanie grunts.]
- Better? - [grunts, inhales sharply.]
- What? - [panting.]
What's up? It's not working for me.
What the fuck do you want? You are one sick bitch.
- [bartender.]
Oh, yeah.
- [Joanie moans.]