The Neighborhood (2018) s04e19 Episode Script

Welcome to the Quinceañera

1 Hey, boss.
I replaced the starter on the SUV, but I can't do anything about that lime-green paint job, though.
Well, you can't fix bad taste.
So, how'd you do on that history test the other day? Oh, I crushed it.
Thanks for helping me study.
History must be easy for you because, you know, you were there and all.
Well, your paycheck is gonna be history if you don't stop playing with me.
Hey.
I brought you two lunch.
- Hi, babe.
- Hey.
Thanks, uh, but the other guys are starting to get jealous.
Well, that's the plan.
Jealousy makes them work harder.
I learned that from my wife.
So, Miss Yoli, I hear you're having a birthday next week.
- Yeah.
I'm turning 16.
- Oh, your mom said that you canceled your quincé last year.
I didn't feel like celebrating since my papi got deported.
I can't imagine.
Well, what if we had a quinceañera for you this year? Well, I mean, since she's 16, wouldn't it be a seis-ceañera? Or a sweet seis-teen? Oh, okay.
Okay, baby, we get it.
You know how to say "six" in Spanish.
And siete.
But, you know, we can do it up big right here in the garage.
And it can be car-themed.
And, ooh! I can make little car cupcakes.
You're not gonna let this go, are you? No, she is not.
'Cause once Tina sets her sights on something, - she gets what she wants.
- Mm.
I mean, how do you think she got all this? Ooh.
Necie, thanks so much for helping us with the decorations - for the quincé.
- Mm.
Now, who is gonna do the music? Babe, you don't have to beg.
All right? I'll do a mix with some Chi-Lites, and I'll sprinkle in some Commodores.
You know, the kids love The Commodores.
Hey, boo.
You remember my cousin Lala that you met last month? - Yeah.
- She deejays.
I can ask her to do it.
Okay.
Well, Necie, do you think your cousin can give us the family discount? I'll see what I can do.
Okay.
"Family discount.
" - Check.
- Mom? A word.
Right-right over here.
Can we just - What? What? - Okay, Mom, look, I'm cool with you and Necie hanging, but please don't scare her away.
How would I do that? You just called her family.
I know you like her, but I also know you keep a chest full of gender-neutral baby clothes in your closet.
Well, the goal is to get them in your closet.
Okay, fine, fine.
I'll be cool.
Okay.
Oh.
Let's see.
Oh, it's Rosa, Yoli's mom.
She's worried about the father-daughter salsa.
Obviously, Yoli's dad can't be here, so - Aw.
- Oh, Dad, maybe you can dance with her.
You guys have gotten close lately.
It could be your gift to her.
It could be my gift to all of y'all.
I got the moves, man.
- Oh! - Oh.
Yes, you do, Mr.
Butler, but you should know the salsa isn't easy.
Oh, Dad, Necie and I took lessons to help with her boxing footwork.
- We can teach you.
- Son, these hips don't lie.
These hips don't lie.
But they certainly bend the truth.
I can't hear you, boy.
I'm in the zone right now.
Grover, Dax is here! - Hey.
- Dax, guess what? I found a diamond sword in level two.
I think we can use it on the zombie mob.
Ooh, come on, buddy.
No Zombie Crushers.
You know that game gives you nightmares.
You know what else gives me nightmares? You saying that in front of my friend.
- Dads can't say anything right.
- I know.
You know, sometimes you want to just drop them off and never pick them up, right? - You're gonna pick him up, right? - Yes.
Yes.
Oh, actually, can it be around 7:30? - Yeah.
- I'm interviewing people - for this new hitting coach spot.
- Oh.
Really? Dave, Barry is the coach of the USC baseball team.
Oh, yeah, cool.
Go, Trojans.
And he's looking for a hitting coach.
Oh, yeah, sure.
Have you tried ZipRecruiter? Uh What's zippier than looking right next door? Malcolm is right next door.
Yeah, our friend Malcolm coaches Grover's baseball team.
- He knows the game inside and out.
- Well, yeah, and he used to play Minor League Baseball.
We think you'd really like him.
That's great.
Love to talk to him.
Tell you what, pass Malcolm my number, and we'll set up an interview.
- Oh, great.
- Thanks, Barry.
All right, we'll see you later.
- Bye.
- All right, take care.
Oh! Not to, uh, toot our own horns, but I think we just got Malcolm a life-changing opportunity.
I think we should, uh, celebrate.
Well But Grover and his friend are here.
Yes.
So, after their playdate, we'll have, uh, our playdate.
- Hey, Dax, it's time to leave.
- What? Stop.
One, two, three.
One, two, three.
Turn her, turn yourself.
Spin around, and - Wepa! - Wepa! Now you try.
- "Try"? Watch me do.
- Mm.
- One, two, three.
- Oh.
- One, two, three.
- Oh.
And go to the right, go to the left.
- Wait.
- Go to the right and left, to the right.
- And boom.
- Uh Dad.
Dad.
No.
Dad.
- Okay.
- Dad, no.
Dad.
Dad.
- What? - That is not the salsa.
That is the electric slide.
It is nice is what it is.
You ain't got to worry about Yoli.
She's in good hands.
Or should I say good feet? Hey.
Go, Trojans.
- Go, Trojans.
- All right.
All our teams are kicking butt this year, huh? Oh, yeah, fight on.
Yeah, well, except for our baseball team.
I don't know what's up with the new coach they hired.
It's like he's trying to lose.
Well, maybe they hired him 'cause he has a great personality.
Yeah, well, it wasn't for his brains, right? I mean, yo, who puts all their power hitters at the top of the lineup? Wait, wait, wait.
What's wrong with that? Uh, nothing if you like strikeouts.
It's hits that get you on base.
Oh, so you know more than the coach? Oh, yeah, I do.
A lot more than Coach Clueless.
Oh! I'm so glad that you guys met.
You know, Gemma and I were telling Barry earlier that you would be perfect for the new USC hitting coach job.
Oh, damn.
That means that you're Barry Dorian.
But you can call me Coach Clueless.
Oh! Right.
You already did.
See you, Dave.
All right, Barry.
What was that all about? Me losing my dream job before I even knew I was up for it.
Uh, baby, shouldn't you be practicing your salsa moves? Why? You can't improve on perfection.
- Hey.
Mind if I come in? - Hey.
Yes.
- Hi.
- Hey.
So, how was dress hunting with your mom? Oh, it was so fun.
We found the dress, but we're still looking for the right tiara.
Oh! Maybe I can help with that.
Tina told me you needed one.
Uh, you have a tiara? Oh, sweetie, sweetie, sweetie.
I'm from Hickory Corners, Michigan.
When we weren't shooting our own dinner, we were teasing our hair for beauty pageants.
Mm-hmm.
And don't even ask about her 31 uses for bacon grease.
This one is my favorite.
Little Miss Teen Pumpkin.
It's beautiful.
Oh, it's still got some hay in it.
It was kind of a wild night.
You know, Yoli, I have a surprise for you, too.
I've been working on my salsa so that we can dance.
- Dance? - Yeah.
Like this.
Check it out.
- Ooh, yes! - Oh! Go, Papi! Go, Papi! - Go, Papi! - Hey! - Yeah! - Yes! Yeah, get it, Yoli! Wepa! Yay! I'm sorry.
Um I can't do this.
What's wrong? What just happened? I don't know.
You think I was too good? Hey.
You're here early.
Yeah.
These brakes are almost done.
Okay, Yoli, look, I'm sorry.
I didn't mean to upset you yesterday.
We can just cancel our salsa dance.
This isn't about the salsa.
Then what is it about? It's just Papi and I used to dance together all the time.
So when you dipped me and said "wepa," it just reminded me that he isn't here.
I can't party when he's all alone.
Okay.
Now, Yoli, you've told me how much your dad went through for you to be here.
Yeah.
He sacrificed everything.
And as a father, all we want is for our kids to be happy.
That's why we sacrifice.
Right? He would want you to enjoy your life.
But how do I do that? Well, you can start by coming to your party.
You know, having a good time.
Dance a little bit.
Eat all that popcorn shrimp I already paid for.
Okay.
I will try.
Good.
Because these moves should not go to waste.
The world has already gone through so much.
Mm.
I know the other day went horribly, but thanks to my charm and adding Dax to our car pool, Barry has agreed to meet with you.
And was this princess look a part of your ploy? No, that was, uh, just us killing time before you got here.
Uh, well, no more questions about that.
Hey, look, I appreciate how much you guys are helping me out.
And God knows it's the kind of job I've been looking for.
But let's be honest.
It's a waste of time meeting with Barry after the way I insulted him.
No, you can always come back from a bad first impression.
Trust me.
I know.
Yeah, it's true.
Dave was the worst first date I ever had.
Mm-hmm.
He may want me to kiss his ass, and that's not me.
Well, you don't have to suck up.
You just have to echo back anything the prospective boss might say.
I don't know, Dave.
Well, people love it when you agree with them.
Wait.
So, were you just agreeing with me when you said you really wanted to go to the monster truck rally? Yes, I was.
Uh But if it means I get to be with you, then it will all be worth it, my princess.
Hey, hey.
Uh, g-guys? Just-just let me Let me get out of here first, please.
Oh.
Yoli's fine, babe.
I saved the day as always.
I should have a cape.
Mm.
Will it help you with your salsa moves? What are you trying to say? Well, Calvin, you need to take this dance more seriously.
I am taking it seriously.
You should see the shirt I have.
The buttons start way down here.
I'm talking about the routine.
You haven't bothered to really learn the steps.
Baby, you just can't shake your hips and throw in a stanky leg and call it salsa.
I can't? Calvin, the father-daughter dance is the highlight of the quinceañera.
You got to get it right.
Look, you're more than Yoli's boss, okay? You've become a father figure to her.
I know.
And now that Malcolm and Marty are older, they don't need me in the same way.
It's actually kind of nice having her around.
Oh, that's so sweet, baby.
I didn't know you felt that way.
Babe, women aren't the only ones that miss raising kids.
I mean, I'm only saying that to you, 'cause if you mention that to anybody else, I will deny it.
Okay, okay.
Your secret is safe with me.
But you need to work on your salsa moves or I'm telling.
Fine.
All right, but don't hate on my stanky leg, - all right? - I'm not.
I'm saving it for our anniversary.
- Oh! Oh, oh! - Okay.
Oh! Oh! Oh! Okay.
Hey! Oh! Tina, Calvin.
The shop looks amazing.
Thank you so much for everything you've done for my daughter.
Well, it's our pleasure.
Yes.
Having Yoli be a part of our team - is like a breath of fresh air.
- Yeah.
I mean, for real, because some of my other guys? They stink.
Ladies and gentlemen, your attention, please.
It's now time to present the quinceañera, Yolanda Soledad Pineda Ramirez.
Yes, mama! Hey! Hey, now.
Turn the funky up ♪ Dave, are you crying? Yeah, of course I'm crying.
Have you not met me? - Hey.
- Hey.
Coach Barry.
Uh First of all, thank you for seeing me, man.
I am so embarrassed about what I said the other day.
Hey, water under the bridge, all right? You know, that is the perfect place for water to be.
Okay.
So, let me tell you about our program and our philosophy.
Now, as you may know, we are focused more on power than we are speed.
Power.
Power to the people.
So, we are setting our lineup to score with home runs.
Mm.
Mm, I got it.
Yeah.
'Cause, um, everybody loves the long ball, right? Exactly.
Like, you should see this kid I just recruited.
Now, he's-he's never gonna win a batting title, but he can knock the cover off the ball.
Covers.
Who needs them, right? Today's game is all about launch angle.
- Mm.
- It's swinging for the fences, living with the strikeouts.
Right.
Swing for the fences, and-and-and you live - Yeah.
- with the strikeouts.
That's, uh Coach, I got to tell you, that-that is That is wrong, man.
No.
I Look, I'm sorry.
I can't take this anymore.
You have got to try putting the ball in play.
Try to steal some bases.
Use your team's speed to go from first to third with a single.
Manufacture some runs.
Try Well, there I go again.
I You know what? I am sorry for wasting your time.
We obviously see the game in two very different ways, and, brother, I got to call it like I see it.
Well I got to call it like I see it, too.
Cute couple alert.
They a'ight.
So, if y'all want more nights like this, we make really good babysitters.
What does that even mean? Ooh! I hope my mom isn't scaring you off.
Because she is kind of scaring me off.
I can handle your mom, gorgeous.
The question is can you handle me? Oh.
Seguimos con el party ♪ We sparkin', lightin' up the party ♪ Round of shots with your girl Mari ♪ Y todas las nenas getting naughty.
♪ All right, everyone.
It's time for the father-daughter dance.
And in place of Yoli's dad, my dad, Calvin Butler.
Yay! My baby! You ready, viejo? You know, I looked that up, and it means "old.
" Oh, well, it does, but, you know, so much gets lost in translation.
When I say it to you, it means you're my favorite old guy.
Aw.
You believed in me.
And I still do.
Come on, guys! Let's go! Hey! Okay! Hey! Oh! Go on, y'all! Oh! Okay, get it, baby! Oh! Hey! Hey! Oh! - Hey now! - Hey! Wepa! Okay, I'll have to admit, - that was pretty fun.
- Yeah.
Well, I'm sorry your dad couldn't be here, but at least he got to see you dance.
What? Papi? Oh, my God.
I miss you so much.
Thank you.
Oh, you're welcome.
Now, don't be too long, because, uh, there's international rates.
Oh.
Then I couldn't hold it back any longer, so I had to tell him what I really thought.
Which is the exact opposite of what I told him to do.
Well, luckily, Dave, it kind of worked out.
Barry liked my honesty.
He liked my passion.
And so you are looking at the new hitting coach for the USC Trojans! You're kidding me, right? No, Pop.
No.
- I start on Monday.
- What?! And so I am officially retiring my old uniform.
Yeah.
I would say hang this thing from the rafters, but, uh, I don't ever want to see it again.
Yes.
Oh, man.
You know, it's been a crazy journey.
- Yeah.
- But, uh, I want you all to know I appreciate that you never stopped believing in me.
Aw.
Especially you, Pop.
Ah.
Well, Malcolm, son, I, um - Somebody else go.
- I will.
I-I will, baby.
Oh, my baby boy.
You are so gifted, Malcolm, and I'm so damn happy - that you're finally being recognized.
- Yeah.
- Thank you, Mom.
- I love you so much.
Yes! - I'm proud of you, too, big bro.
- My man.
And a special thanks to Dave and Gemma - for introducing me to Barry.
- Yeah.
- Well, of course.
- Well, it was my idea, so Okay, you know what? L-Like I was saying, Malcolm, I'm really proud of you, man, and, uh it's an honor to be your father.
You I was, uh - You know what I'm talking about.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Well, how about we go inside and celebrate.
- Yeah! - Let's go!
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