The Real Ghostbusters (1986) s02e32 Episode Script

The Collect Call of Cthulhu

If there's something strange
In the neighborhood
Who you gonna call?
If there's something weird
And it don't look good
Who you gonna call?
I ain't afraid of no ghost
I ain't afraid of no ghost
Who you gonna call?
Who you gonna call?
I tell you, Ashton,
no good can come of this.
Putting the Necronomicon on display
like this is dangerous.
Nonsense, Kline.
Maybe up in Arkham
they still believe in spooks,
but here in the big city,
we're a bit more sophisticated.
Your precious book of spells
will be quite safe here
I assure you.
Uh, who's there?
Hey, listen to this.
"From Monday to Friday,
the New York Public Library presents
the Necronomicon!"
I didn't know the library
did rock concerts.
It's not a rock group, Winston.
It's the single most powerful book
of magic spells ever written.
H.P. Lovecraft and others
wrote a whole series
of horror stories based on it.
Come on, we gotta see it.
I'll bet the copyright page alone
has a P.K.E valance of 9.9.
You go ahead, Ray, I've got a date today.
She'll be here any minute, in fact.
Ghostbusters. Uh-huh?
Hang on, help is on the way.
That's for me.
So's this.
I've got it, Peter.
You're a prince, Egon.
I see.
No problem. We can handle it.
OK, introductions.
-Candi, the Ghostbusters.
-The Ghostbusters, Candi.
Wow, I've heard so much about you guys.
Well, we've got a full day planned, so
Sorry, Peter, we've got what sounds like
a class 7 corporeal entity at the library.
Great, I'll go warm up Ecto-1.
It's not fair.
It's just not fair.
Besides, you knew the job was
dangerous when you took it.
Ghostbusters are heartbreakers, kid.
Don't get too close to him.
Thank heaven, you've come.
I'm Professor Ted Kline
from Miskatonic University in Arkham,
and this is Clark Ashton,
in charge of the exhibit.
I'm sure there's no reason to be alarmed.
No doubt someone just stole
the book for ransom.
I'm getting high paranormal readings.
We must get it back,
otherwise the city,
perhaps even the world, is in grave peril.
I don't see what all the fuss is about.
It's just a book.
And an atomic bomb
is just a couple of rocks
slammed together.
This is the only English translation
of the Necronomicon.
If someone were to read
the spells in it aloud,
the results would be catastrophic.
Should be easy enough to follow the trail.
Please, hurry!
Sheesh, you'd think that guy Kline
owns the paperback rights
the way he's carrying on.
He's right to worry, Peter.
The Necronomicon spells
are like sonic keys
that can open portals to other dimensions
where the great Old Ones
wait to take over the Earth.
Yeah? Give me an example.
I heard of him. He's bad, right?
He makes Gozer look like
little Mary Sunshine.
You're kidding.
We're following them into the sewer?
There's no other choice.
I should've listened to my Uncle Alf
and gone into the hardware business.
Do you hear something?
I hope not.
Hey, I think we found them.
Wrong, Ray. I think they found us.
OK, let's hit them high and low!
Ha, teach them to mess
with today's technology.
Think we can get out money back
on these proton packs?
We can boil it.
Hurry. I'll hold them off.
These guys sure can't take a hint.
Hang on!
Thanks, Winston.
That was one party I didn't mind leaving.
Those green meanies
match the description here
of the Spawn of Cathulhu.
Acolyte creatures that serve the big guy.
I suspected as much.
We have to find the Necronomicon at once.
What's the rush?
We'll track it down sooner or later.
You don't understand.
The spawn are probably
part of a Cult of Cathulhu,
and they might be planning to awaken him
from his slumber on the ocean's floor.
-That's bad.
-And according to this,
"The stars are in the right position
to try such a resurrection
only once every 60 years."
"And the next favorable time is"
Let me guess,
How'd you know?
We need as much information
on the Cult of Cathulhu as we can get.
There's a woman named Alice Derleth
up in Arkham, Massachusetts
who might be able to help us.
Ray, you and Winston
check the book of Dai-San
and the necrotic manuscripts.
Peter, you and I will go up to Arkham.
So, what's this Alice Derleth like?
A renowned academician and scholar
with a PhD in occult sciences.
I bet she looks like a tank
and has a personality to match.
This looks like Frankenstein's alma mater.
Dr. Spengler.
I'm Alice Derleth.
Wow, you sure don't look smart.
I beg your pardon?
I meanThat is, can we talk?
And that's the situation.
What do you think?
"That is not dead which can eternal lie,
and with strange eons even death may die."
Gee, that's catchy.
It's a quote from the Necronomicon
about great Cathulhu.
If we don't do something quickly,
this cult may succeed in awakening him
from his age-long sleep.
I'll go with you back to New York.
Hurry, there's not a moment to lose.
She's a take charge kind of lady.
I like that.
There it is,
Wagner's occult shop.
We think this is
where the cult is meeting.
Let's check it out.
Wait, listen.
It's coming from there, the basement.
This is a raid.
Nobody moves, nobody gets hurt.
Did you do that?
Hey, hey, easy.
I'mI'm all right.
Whew, spell casting
takes a lot out of one.
Looks like we're back to square one.
The occult's beat it.
Right, we better think
of something fast or
I've got an idea. Listen.
Ray, that is
the craziest idea I ever heard.
You think some old science fiction stories
can save the world?
Listen, H.P. Lovecraft
and other writers back
in the '20s and the '30s
created a whole mythos around Cathulhu.
And I remember one story
in an old issue of Weird Tales
that told how to defeat him.
It just might work.
Those writers use the Necronomicon
as research for their fiction.
But where can we find a collection
of old cult magazines?
Just leave it to me.
This joint would scare Stephen King.
Mr. Howard, remember me, Ray Stantz?
I used to borrow your books
when I was a kid.
Of course.
Come in, and bring your friends.
This is ridiculous.
We've been at this for hours.
We can't give up.
If Ray is right, it's our only
chance to stop the summoning.
We're getting nowhere.
How about we just wait for
Whatever his name is.
When he shows up, let's blast him.
Winston's got a point.
Something that looks like Godzilla
wearing a giant octopus hat
won't be hard to find.
This is it.
It's called the Horror from the Depth.
That's the one, all right. Let's go.
According to my calculation,
the most opportune place
for the cult to perform
the summoning ceremony
is the southern tip of Brooklyn.
Coney Island, to be exact.
It seems oddly appropriate.
I thought you were supposed
to rotate the tires.
I figured, why bother?
They rotate enough when the car's moving.
Hey, no problem.
We'll just put on the spare and
That was the spare.
Yo, Jack,
where's the costume party happening?
Back off, man,
I'm a Ghostbuster.
Oh, yeah?
I thought you was an astronaut
or something, man.
If you want we can send you
to the moon easy enough.
Do you think we'll make it?
We have to. That's all.
We have to.
OK. Now what?
That way.
Oh, no!
I think we're too late.
What gave you the first clue?
Full stream now!
It's not working.
We're in serious trouble.
There's one thing left to try.
Aim for the head.
Maybe we can blind him.
Uh-oh, I think we made it mad.
Run for it!
Sometimes I really regret
answering that ad you guys ran.
Egon, what do you got?
Its power is completely off the scale.
None of our equipment
can even begin to stop him.
We don't have a prayer.
You such a Pollyanna, Egon.
Ray, the story in the magazine.
Right! I forgot about it.
Great. He moves his lips when he reads.
It says here that they lured Cathulhu
to an electrical plant
and blasted him with 100
gigavolts volt of electricity.
So, did it work?
I don't know.
The last page is missing.
Where can we get that kind of power?
There's one chance.
If can we lure him near the rollercoaster,
we can use our particle beams
to ionize the metal superstructure.
That might attract a lightning bolt.
It's worth a try.
But how do we get Cathulhu
near the rollercoaster?
I've got an idea.
A very crazy idea.
Ghostbusters ♪
Ghostbusters ♪
OK, squid face, I'm gonna
make calamari out of you.
Ghostbusters ♪
He's gotta get off the track.
We can't electrify it until he does.
Boy, talk about an e-ticket ride.
Ghostbusters ♪
More power!
If he breaks free before
the lightning strikes
Well, now we know how the story ended.
Yeah, and somebody wants
to talk to us about it.
Better late than never.
Clark Ashton.
Boy, you can't trust anybody.
You may have won this time,
but Cathulhu cannot be destroyed!
He waits and dreams in the deep!
And the cities of man
shall fall before him!
Yeah, yeah, sure.
Book 'em, boys.
I'll take the Necronomicon
back to Miskatonic University with me
where it can't be used for evil.
Do you think Cathulhu was destroyed,
Professor Derleth?
Even if he wasn't,
the stars are no longer
right for him to awaken.
The world is safe again
for a time.
I must be going.
Uh, what's your hurry?
Why not let me show you
the town for a few days.
We'll start by seeing the exhibit
of the Eltdown Shards
at the Natural History Museum.
Uh, that wasn't exactly
what I had in mind.
And there's a lecture
on the Zanthu tablets
and other pre-durudic
petroglyphs at Columbia.
Listen, there's this
great restaurant I know,
you'd like it, really.
Or a movie
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