True Jackson, VP (2008) s01e14 Episode Script

True Jackson VP was filmed In front of a live Studio audience.
Ryan, what are you doing? No need to thank me.
I didn't.
I asked what you're doing.
Well, I'm just souping up Your keyboard.
I downloaded a program To make it sound like an organ.
Well, move over.
I need to send Mr.
Madigan An updated design schedule.
Can you turn this thing off? Okay, try hitting alt f8.
I also loaded in Some other sound effects.
Try shift f3.
Hey, you know what? I'll just tell him in person.
Knock it off.
Nope, that one was all me.
Hey, Oscar.
Do you know if Mr.
Madigan Is in? Yes, and he brought donuts.
Break room? Break room.
I hear there's donuts.
Let me turn you on To something way better, a pear.
Ever had one? Have I ever had a pear? Yes.
They're like nature's candy.
Good job, God, I dig your pears.
I don't think we've met.
I'm True Jackson, VP.
Mitchell, Lord of the copy room.
That's not an official title, Just an accurate description Of what I do.
Well, nice to meet you.
Hey, nice to be met.
Do you like it here? I love it.
How about you? Yeah4 it's pretty mellow And where's Mitchell? for the most part.
Well, good luck with that.
Does this look Familiar to you? I believe That's the revised business plan You had me copy for you.
Oh, is it? Yeah.
Would you do me a favor And read the first line On page 26.
Let's see.
Page 26? Yeah.
Oh, boy.
"oh, boy"? Is that what it says on page 26? Oh, I don't think so.
Because there is no page 26.
How hard is it to copy a report? Now fix it.
What's all the commotion? Oh, no commotion.
Just a little exchange of ideas.
Really? Because I thought I heard screaming, And then a bunch of pigeons Flew off my windowsill.
Yeah, Amanda was having A breakdown in the break room, A conniption in the kitchen, A hissy by the dishes.
A freak-out by the fridge.
Are you quite done? A stinky by the sinky.
Okay, now we're done.
If you must know, Mitchell failed To print page 26 Of my revised business plan.
I can see why you'd be upset.
Thank you.
So maybe from now on, You should copy Your own reports.
What? Do you think I have the vaguest idea How to operate a copy machine? We should try Switcheroo day.
I'm sorry? Switcheroo day.
We do it at our school.
Everyone switches places.
Students with teachers, Teachers with lunch ladies, Lunch ladies With security guards.
I mean, it really helps you Appreciate how the whole School works.
Huh! Switcheroo day.
Interesting.
No, it isn't.
Switcheroo day.
Oh, no, I do not like The way he keeps repeating that.
from my head to my toes its all real and you know fresh and cool it's just what I do t-r-u-e j-a-c-k-s-o-n v-p working at a grown-up job I never really knew I could work this hard just used to sit at home and watch tv now I'm in an office as the new VP I'm always setting trends with my two best friends when things get out of hand we have a plan we're just messin' around and we're makin' new ground for the whole wide world to see if you see us in town you know it's goin' down 'cause I'm the new VP (the new VP) True, tell everyone How we play our game.
Everyone gets to spin The wheel And whatever they land on Is their job for the day.
Or maybe win Some yummy cotton candy.
Cotton candy? Can I play? We've been through this.
You don't work here.
Not technically, But I have keys To most of the offices.
Close enough, sit down.
Uncle Max, Can I talk to you real fast? What is it, Jimmy? If it's cool with you, I'd like to stay In the mail room And, you know, Keep an eye on things.
The point of this exercise Is that we all learn Another job.
Yeah, I'm not really Comfortable with anyone else Driving the cart.
One of the wheels Is a little wobbly.
Plus, the postal rate Is constantly changing.
Not now, Jimmy.
I'll spin first.
And I'm "the boss.
" I'll spin again.
This time, I'm "the boss.
" maybe it's weighted wrong And it always lands On "boss.
" let me try.
Come on, baby.
Land on "boss.
" Land on "boss.
" And I'm "copy room"? No.
Score.
Way to go, Amanda.
True, you're up.
Oh, I'm so nervous.
Oh, what's To be nervous about? There are no bad choices here.
Besides, you might get Lucky enough to be "the boss"? I'm the boss? I'm the boss! True, a real boss Would never jump up and down.
Just kidding.
I love to jump.
"vice president, Teen apparel.
" "assistant To the vice president.
" "vice president, women's wear.
" but that's my job.
"mail room.
" awesome.
No! Your turn, Jimmy.
What's the use? "security.
" I'll bet he's gonna look So cute in that cop suit.
And I'm "receptionist.
" I do believe we're done here.
True, since I'm not The boss today, Would you mind terribly? Of course.
Kopelman, out! Sorry.
Feels pretty good, huh? A little bit.
Mad style, How may I direct your call? Seriously, how do I Direct your call? I don't have a clue.
Hello? Hey, Mr.
Madigan, How's it going? Either I'm hanging up On a lot of people Or they're hanging up on me.
How's it going with you? Great.
Just making the rounds, Checking up on my people.
So far, no problems.
Beep beep, coming through.
Whoops.
What do you think You're doing? Oh, you know, Delivering mail, Crashing into stuff With my cart.
First of all, It's not your cart.
Second, it's my cart.
Third, I want my cart back.
Oh, sure, You can have it back.
If you can catch me.
Beep beep.
Man, he looks so cute In his cop suit.
Hey, Oscar, How's your switcheroo going? Couldn't be better.
I'm sitting in the lobby, Answering phones.
Yeah, I guess not much Has changed.
A little's changed.
I get to fetch snacks For a 16-year-old Who doesn't actually work here.
I'm sure it's not that bad.
Where are my carrots?! He's always cranky Before he gets His morning carrots.
Hi, Ryan.
Hey, True.
You got any carrots? No.
Well, thanks for stopping by.
If you don't mind, I need to get back to work.
What are you doing? Same thing You're always doing, Making a stupid face Out the window.
Hey, that's my thinkin' face.
Well, call it whatever You want, it's still A whole bunch of nothin'.
Ryan.
Fine, tell me what you do.
It's the best job In the world.
I get paid to daydream.
Then, I draw my daydreams.
If you ask me, You got lucky.
No, kopelman got lucky.
Man, I love cotton candy.
Shut your eyes and picture How you'd look if you could Wear anything.
No can do.
If I shut my eyes For more than five seconds, I fall asleep.
Really? Yeah, check it out.
How long was I out? Machine, print.
Machine, print.
I like your shoes, Amanda.
Thank you, machine.
Oh.
Ha ha.
I knew it was you.
I'm just playing.
Everything okay? Of course, Everything is okay.
This is the easiest job Known to man.
Whoa.
Who put that there? By the way, I think the machine needs toner.
In what way? You know, The ink for the machine? It's there on the shelf, And there's An instruction manual.
I hardly think I need an instruction manual To fill the machine with tuner.
Toner.
Toner.
Well, okay.
Keep up the good work.
Aaaaaah! Mitchell? Is that a belt sander? Just peeling off the old paint, Making room for my mural.
It's Picasso's classic guernica, Only with panda bears.
Did Amanda say that was okay? More or less.
It's all good.
Hey, Ryan.
Ah-ah-ah.
Mr.
Laserbeam.
I checked in the break room And we're all out of carrots.
Oh.
Well, can you go To the carrot factory? I'm five seconds away From falling asleep.
Hey, that's not bad.
True said That to design clothes, I should imagine something I'd like to wear myself.
You're a superhero? Well, not publicly.
But if I was, I might go For something like this.
You know What might look good? If the shoes had flames.
Flames.
Now you're talking.
And maybe darken the cape, So it looks A little more ominous.
Ohh, that does look cooler.
We make a pretty good team.
Ryan and Oscar.
"roscar.
" Roscar rules! Roscar rules! Please stop doing that.
Sorry, roscar.
Roscar rules! So you were saying something About darkening the cape? Anyone see Lulu? Uh, no.
It's 11 minutes Till parcel pickup.
If she misses it, The next one's Not for another hour.
Why are you just standing there? We need to find her.
Thank you for calling Mad style.
Who? Kopelman? Never heard of him.
Any messages for me? Actuatly, yes.
You got a call From the hunter and keel people.
Who's that? A very, very big client.
They put one Of our exclusive designs In their catalog each year.
Okay, what did they want? The catalog Goes to the printer At the end of the day And at the last minute, They've rejected our design.
Gosh, that sounds Like a big deal.
It's a huge deal.
If we're not in that catalog, We'll lose a lot of money.
We might even have to let go Of some of our employees.
Oh, no.
What are you gonna do? Me? I'm just the receptionist.
You're the boss.
Mr.
Madigan mad style, How may I direct your call? Mr.
Madigan.
I think I'm finally getting The hang of this thing.
What am I supposed to do About hunter and keel? I would imagine You only have a few hours To fix the problem.
Okay.
But how? If they don't want That design, Give them another.
Just remember one word: Dact.
I don't know that word.
I don't know anything.
D-a-c-t.
Design, approve, Copy, transport.
Dact.
But I can't dact All by myself.
You're not all by yourself.
You have a staff.
Lulu.
Lulu.
Lulu, I'm in major trouble.
What's up? This major catalog company Rejected our design And we need to replace it In the next two hours.
Oh! Not even.
I never should've mentioned Switcheroo day.
You think you'd have learned Your lesson that time Ryan switched places With the lunch lady And gave everyone Explosive diarrhea.
How could I forget? I was the janitor.
Maybe I better get Ryan Working on a new design.
Okay, see you in a bit.
Lulu, you should be careful With that thing.
Of course I'm being careful.
See ya.
Sorry, kopelman.
Oh, my gosh, Amanda.
What happened? Nothing happened.
I was simply changing The tuner toner.
Toner.
And a little spilled on me.
I'm sure it's hardly noticeable.
I've got a huge problem.
The hunter and keel people Threw out our design.
What? But it's supposed To go to print today.
I know.
We need to get the new stuff To them in two hours Or people might get fired.
Can you help me? Help you, no.
Take over, yes.
Ah-ah-ah, that would violate The spirit of switcheroo day.
Forget switcheroo day.
This is too big for me To handle.
I give up.
Give up? That hardly sounds like The girl I hired To head our teen division.
Fine.
Amanda, you've got A little smudge on your cheek.
Do this.
Perfect.
Ryan, I what's that? A design for my new Business-wear line.
What business? Protecting the universe.
Are there any Dark blue markers? For the elbow pads? You read my mind.
Oscar, how do I work The intercom to the whole floor? Just pick up any phone And dial 68 star.
Hey, everyone, It's me, True.
Your boss? I'm sort of calling A staff meeting In the conference room.
Okay? Don't just walk around Like you can't hear me.
I said get your butts In the conference room now! Now! Thank you.
Everybody listen And listen good.
We have a situation.
Hunter and keel Rejected our last design, So we need to get a new one To them immediately.
Here's how it's goin' down: Ryan.
Present.
You and Oscar need to whip up A new design.
You've already got great colors.
Now make it for people.
Technically, Superheroes are people, They just have amazing powers.
Amanda, we need that copier In working order And ready to run copies For the new design In a half an hour.
Got it.
Lulu, I need you To arrange for a courier To be waiting in the lobby In one hour.
Courier in the lobby In an hour.
Got it.
What am I forgetting? What am I forgetting? Nothing.
Relax, True.
You're right.
I need to relax.
This is me relaxing.
Why are you all Just sitting there? Move, move, move! No.
No.
No.
No.
Yes.
Yes.
It's simple, but distinctive.
Good work, guys.
Now let's get this copied.
Roscar rules! I can't believe I just said that.
Here's the design.
Is the copier ready? It's loaded with fresh toner, And I even had time To clean the print rollers.
You know, Amanda, I'm really impressed.
You should be, this baby Is in tip-top condition.
I swear that was an accident.
Okay, okay, I can deal with this.
I'm sure any second, I'm gonna come up With a super-awesome idea.
Are you okay? You look like You're gonna be sick.
No, it's my thinkin' face.
I've got it.
We'll send the original.
Lulu, I need that mailing tube.
Where's the courier? They just called From the lobby, He's on his way up.
I have to admit, I had my doubts, But we really pulled this off.
Here's the courier.
Courier pizza, we deliver Flavor.
Not even.
You called the wrong courier? I guess that's why He kept asking me What toppings like.
I just thought He was just being chatty.
What am I gonna do now? A fax machine.
Wait.
That's not a fax machine.
It's a shredder.
Right.
But it says "fax" On the side.
That's the name of the brand.
Fax brand shredders? That's crazy! Not as crazy As the mom's fresh-baked apple Rat poison we're using In the break room.
If it makes you feel Any better, I thought it was A fax machine, too.
And nobody eat that apple pie I made in the break room.
Thanks for gathering, people, I know it's been a long, Tough switcheroo.
But perhaps we've learned Something today.
Anyone? Courier pizza Has the best sausage in town? Switcheroo day's over, son.
Go home.
Okay.
Have a seat, Mitchell.
I was just asking What we've learned from today.
Well, I for one Learned a bunch.
I was reviewing Amanda's business plan wait, you reviewed My business plan? Well, all except for page 26, Which is gone, daddy, gone.
Anyway, I realized We really weren't reaching out To the asian markets, So I hopped on the horn To xing peng Xing peng? He's our competitor.
Was our competitor.
I got him to agree to use us As his sole provider Of stitched collars.
Do you speak chinese? Yi dian.
I can't believe this.
Oh, yeah, The deal's worth $7 million.
Are these for anyone? Well, that fits right in With the spirit of the day.
Hopefully, we've learned That we're all part Of a bigger picture.
See you tomorrow.
True, hang back a moment.
You're really gonna let me Have it, aren't you? Yes, True, I am going to let you have it.
Here.
A present? But I failed, Mr.
Madigan.
Totally and utterly failed.
Yes, you did.
Welcome to the club.
What's this? It's the design You accidentally shredded, Tastefully framed.
You framed my failure? Mm-hmm.
Tastefully.
I'm confused, Mr.
Madigan.
Are you saying That it's good to fail? I'm not saying That it's good, I'm saying it's part of life.
You can never succeed If you're too afraid to fail.
It's easy to embrace Your successes, True.
You have to learn to embrace Your failures as well.
Good night.
You know, this really Was a good switcheroo day.
We should do one every Monday.
I don't know about that.
But I will admit to having A newfound appreciation For the less important.
That doesn't sound Like appreciation to me.
But honestly, I think Mitchell deserves A great deal of admiration.
Well, maybe you should Tell him that sometime.
Maybe I will.
Aaaaaaah! Why are there panda bears On my wall? Mitchell! Where are you, You filthy hippie? What's wrong, Jimmy? Nothing.
I'm just waiting for Emma.
Who's Emma? My mail cart.
Emma.
You're here.
Uh, my name's Lulu.
Not you.
Is there anything More attractive than a guy In cape and tights? Come on, Lulu, let's go.
We have a city to defend.
You won't be insulted If I pretend I don't know you, Will you? Kind of used to it.
'night, citizens.
Allow me, young lady.
Give it!