Wabbit - A Looney Tunes Production (2016) s01e11 Episode Script
Bugs vs Snail/To Catch a Fairy
1 (THEME MUSIC PLAYING) Going down the rabbit hole Where we're going no one knows Obstacles 'round every bend Let's see where the tunnel ends (DOORBELL RINGS) After four months, it's here.
Ahem.
-It is customary for you to -Thank you.
My first kite.
Aerodynamic designs, sleek titanium frame, self-monitoring wind flaps, the finest Japanese silk and a tail made from the And a half a tail made from the willowy wisps of the last-existing jajouka tree.
(WHISTLING) (GROANING) Hey, little fella, what are you doing here? Who do you think delivered the package? Oh, snail mail.
That explains the four months.
But, I got here early.
Well, I'm late to fly my kite.
So, out of the way.
It is customary to tip excellent service.
-A tip? -Come on, just a little something.
You know what? Let me give you a hand.
I'm not leaving till I get that tip.
Hmm.
Well, since you're staying, let me show you around.
Ah! (STRAINING) Here's the kitchen and the living room, the bedroom, the hallway, the bathroom, and the toil Whoa! (GURGLING) Ugh! (SCREAMS) (GASPS) (GRUNTING) Well, it's not like today could get any worse.
(KNOCKING ON DOOR) -FOGHORN: Bugs, I say, Bugs! -(GASPS) Why, I was gonna go fly the kite, I say, you wanna come? Well, I guess that rabbit ain't home.
Well, I reckon there's no kite flying for me.
No, don't go.
(GRUNTING) -I blame you.
-Give me a tip.
I'm going to give you some salt is what I'm (GRUNTING) Fine, be that way.
(PANTING) Nonstick pans.
Nonstick pans! Nonstick! Nonstick! Nonstick pans! (GRUNTS) (YELPS) FOGHORN: Well, I say, I say, whoo-hoo! There's still time to fly my kite.
My kite! SNAIL: All you got to do is give me a tip.
Oh, I'll give you something.
Well, there's more than one way to skin a snail.
And that wasn't it.
(DRILLING) (PANTING) You know, if you want your kite, you should try a tip.
Okay, think, rabbit.
Open your mind.
Maybe an idea will hit you.
It's coming to me.
Almost there.
Around the turn, heading for home.
I've set up enough of these gags to know what happens next.
That's it.
(CACKLING) (AIR WHOOSHING) (BEES BUZZING) (BURPS) My first kite.
(SIGHS) Leaving so soon? You're going to be sticking around.
Perfect, good as new.
(HUMMING) Hmm.
So, is this all there is to flying a kite? Yeah, you hold the strings and the kite blows in the wind.
Meh.
-How about that tip? -Want some pizza? Deal! You're a whale of a snail.
(SNORING) (ALARM BEEPING) Argh! (GROANING) (SCREAMS) My teeth! (WHIMPERING) Ahhh! Hmm.
(GASPS) Hey, uh, excuse me, sir Uh, ma'am.
You see, those are mine.
-So, I'll just -Sir! Your head was under the pillow, so, technically, I had to take them.
Well, can't you give them back? Already started the paperwork, sir.
Maybe I wasn't clear.
You see, I'm really gonna need those.
-What am I going to do now? -(DOORBELL RINGS) -(SQUEAKING) -Hey, Squeaks.
Look, it's not really a good time right now (LAUGHING) Well, laugh it up, fuzz ball.
Hey, laughing boy, you want funny? (GASPS) (GROWLING) Who's laughing now? Well, hello again.
A lovely $50 commission for me, 35 cents for you.
Maybe we got off on the wrong foot here, foot being teeth.
You see, I need my teeth back.
And, although I do appreciate the coins Sir! Don't spend it all in one place.
(TOOTH FAIRY LAUGHING) (SQUEAKING) Squeaks, I'll play cards with you when we get our teeth back.
(SQUEAKS SCOFFS) What is this, Everyone Complains Day? (STOMACH RUMBLING) Ah, I gotta get something to eat.
This is gonna be painful.
(GROANING) (CRYING) (SQUEAKS MUNCHING) Well, well, well, what else are you hiding in those wittle teeth? Come here! What are you doing? All right.
What's the matter with you? Hmm, now I forget.
Split on aces or is it eights? (SQUEAKING) Look at those nuts.
Trust me buddy, I'm gonna get our teeth back.
Squeaks, if you wanna make an omelet, you gotta pull some teeth.
I just need one more thing from you.
If life hands you lemons, you gotta make lemon teeth, right? Okay, that didn't come out.
Okay, but, we're gonna get our teeth back.
I promise you, buddy.
And then, we're going to play cards.
(SHUTTER CLICKS) Bingo! The tooth shall set you free.
-Give me that! -Sorry.
But we could trade for my teeth.
Ugh, fine.
(CHUCKLING) (GROWLING) (TOOTH FAIRY CACKLING) -(SQUEAKS MUTTERING) -Squeaks.
(BOTH YAWNING) That's it! (DOORBELL RINGS) Why, if it isn't my Yeah, yeah, I've gotta go, gotta find a tooth fairy.
Thank you.
Almost ready, Squeaks.
(SQUEAKING) Another one.
You're not gonna try anything? (YAWNING) No, you know, I'm tired of haggling.
(YAWNING) Okay, you can have your teeth back.
Oh, I'm not after my teeth.
(TOOTH FAIRY SCREAMING) Squeaks, you thought I was gonna rip her teeth out? Now, that's creepy.
Do you have an appointment? Well, come on in! Ah, deal me in, Squeaks.
Oh, no, you first.
(BUGS GIGGLING)
Ahem.
-It is customary for you to -Thank you.
My first kite.
Aerodynamic designs, sleek titanium frame, self-monitoring wind flaps, the finest Japanese silk and a tail made from the And a half a tail made from the willowy wisps of the last-existing jajouka tree.
(WHISTLING) (GROANING) Hey, little fella, what are you doing here? Who do you think delivered the package? Oh, snail mail.
That explains the four months.
But, I got here early.
Well, I'm late to fly my kite.
So, out of the way.
It is customary to tip excellent service.
-A tip? -Come on, just a little something.
You know what? Let me give you a hand.
I'm not leaving till I get that tip.
Hmm.
Well, since you're staying, let me show you around.
Ah! (STRAINING) Here's the kitchen and the living room, the bedroom, the hallway, the bathroom, and the toil Whoa! (GURGLING) Ugh! (SCREAMS) (GASPS) (GRUNTING) Well, it's not like today could get any worse.
(KNOCKING ON DOOR) -FOGHORN: Bugs, I say, Bugs! -(GASPS) Why, I was gonna go fly the kite, I say, you wanna come? Well, I guess that rabbit ain't home.
Well, I reckon there's no kite flying for me.
No, don't go.
(GRUNTING) -I blame you.
-Give me a tip.
I'm going to give you some salt is what I'm (GRUNTING) Fine, be that way.
(PANTING) Nonstick pans.
Nonstick pans! Nonstick! Nonstick! Nonstick pans! (GRUNTS) (YELPS) FOGHORN: Well, I say, I say, whoo-hoo! There's still time to fly my kite.
My kite! SNAIL: All you got to do is give me a tip.
Oh, I'll give you something.
Well, there's more than one way to skin a snail.
And that wasn't it.
(DRILLING) (PANTING) You know, if you want your kite, you should try a tip.
Okay, think, rabbit.
Open your mind.
Maybe an idea will hit you.
It's coming to me.
Almost there.
Around the turn, heading for home.
I've set up enough of these gags to know what happens next.
That's it.
(CACKLING) (AIR WHOOSHING) (BEES BUZZING) (BURPS) My first kite.
(SIGHS) Leaving so soon? You're going to be sticking around.
Perfect, good as new.
(HUMMING) Hmm.
So, is this all there is to flying a kite? Yeah, you hold the strings and the kite blows in the wind.
Meh.
-How about that tip? -Want some pizza? Deal! You're a whale of a snail.
(SNORING) (ALARM BEEPING) Argh! (GROANING) (SCREAMS) My teeth! (WHIMPERING) Ahhh! Hmm.
(GASPS) Hey, uh, excuse me, sir Uh, ma'am.
You see, those are mine.
-So, I'll just -Sir! Your head was under the pillow, so, technically, I had to take them.
Well, can't you give them back? Already started the paperwork, sir.
Maybe I wasn't clear.
You see, I'm really gonna need those.
-What am I going to do now? -(DOORBELL RINGS) -(SQUEAKING) -Hey, Squeaks.
Look, it's not really a good time right now (LAUGHING) Well, laugh it up, fuzz ball.
Hey, laughing boy, you want funny? (GASPS) (GROWLING) Who's laughing now? Well, hello again.
A lovely $50 commission for me, 35 cents for you.
Maybe we got off on the wrong foot here, foot being teeth.
You see, I need my teeth back.
And, although I do appreciate the coins Sir! Don't spend it all in one place.
(TOOTH FAIRY LAUGHING) (SQUEAKING) Squeaks, I'll play cards with you when we get our teeth back.
(SQUEAKS SCOFFS) What is this, Everyone Complains Day? (STOMACH RUMBLING) Ah, I gotta get something to eat.
This is gonna be painful.
(GROANING) (CRYING) (SQUEAKS MUNCHING) Well, well, well, what else are you hiding in those wittle teeth? Come here! What are you doing? All right.
What's the matter with you? Hmm, now I forget.
Split on aces or is it eights? (SQUEAKING) Look at those nuts.
Trust me buddy, I'm gonna get our teeth back.
Squeaks, if you wanna make an omelet, you gotta pull some teeth.
I just need one more thing from you.
If life hands you lemons, you gotta make lemon teeth, right? Okay, that didn't come out.
Okay, but, we're gonna get our teeth back.
I promise you, buddy.
And then, we're going to play cards.
(SHUTTER CLICKS) Bingo! The tooth shall set you free.
-Give me that! -Sorry.
But we could trade for my teeth.
Ugh, fine.
(CHUCKLING) (GROWLING) (TOOTH FAIRY CACKLING) -(SQUEAKS MUTTERING) -Squeaks.
(BOTH YAWNING) That's it! (DOORBELL RINGS) Why, if it isn't my Yeah, yeah, I've gotta go, gotta find a tooth fairy.
Thank you.
Almost ready, Squeaks.
(SQUEAKING) Another one.
You're not gonna try anything? (YAWNING) No, you know, I'm tired of haggling.
(YAWNING) Okay, you can have your teeth back.
Oh, I'm not after my teeth.
(TOOTH FAIRY SCREAMING) Squeaks, you thought I was gonna rip her teeth out? Now, that's creepy.
Do you have an appointment? Well, come on in! Ah, deal me in, Squeaks.
Oh, no, you first.
(BUGS GIGGLING)