Off Campus (2026) s01e02 Episode Script

-Five p.m. Tuesday.
-Rehearsal.
Two p.m. Thursday.
A class, then work, then rehearsal.
-Seven a.m. Tuesday?
-Practice.
Seven a.m. Wednesday? Also practice.
See? This is why I told you
I can't help you.
-You're busy, I'm busy.
-That's fine, we'll make it work.
The pop showcase needs to be
my top priority.
Well, passing this class is mine.
[sighs]
-Give me your phone.
-What?
Just…
-Thanks.
-[camera shutter clicks]
Thank you.
All right.
Nine p.m. tonight.
After "The sounds of wind and fog."
Is that a class or a haiku?
[laughs] It's a class.
I want to be a film composer.
Oh.
That's cool.
All right, phone?
Hold on.
[camera shutter clicks]
Nice.
Okay, now you have my number.
I sent myself a text, so I have yours.
Oh, and actually…
-[camera shutter clicks]
-Whoa! Easy.
Wellsy, you're gonna have to loosen up
if we're dating.
-It's Hannah.
-I like Wellsy.
-[scoffs]
-We're gonna have to take that again.
Okay, no, we don't.
You can't just kiss me out of the blue.
Actually, you can't kiss me at all.
If we're gonna be fake dating,
there needs to be real kissing.
I just met you.
So, what are we gonna do? Hold hands?
I mean…
I mean, heh, it's cute,
but it's not gonna work.
-Well, why not?
-Because we have to make him jealous.
And no guy gets jealous
about holding hands.
We'll agree to disagree.
You seriously think that's gonna
get Justin's attention?
Just walk down the hall holding hands?
Problem is, I don't do girlfriends.
Everyone that follows Fifth Line
knows that.
Am I supposed to know
what Fifth Line is?
How have you never…
It's the Briar gossip account.
Like, mostly hockey team shit.
Oh, because your lives are so interesting?
I mean, yeah, kinda.
Trust me, if we're gonna convince Justin,
we gotta convince Jules.
Who?
My best friend's younger sibling.
They run the account.
If Jules believes we're real,
we make it onto Fifth Line.
-And if we make it onto Fifth Line--
-No, okay, I get it.
But why can't we just tell Jules?
Get them in on it?
They don't do fake gossip.
For this plan to work,
we have to sell it.
Classic first period strategy.
♪So one, two, three
take my hand and come with me♪
♪Because you look so fine
that I really wanna make you mine♪
[Garrett] Maintain possession of the puck
and establish a rhythm.
Throw your opponent off his game,
get the crowd on your side.
[Hannah]
Wait, sorry, I'm the puck?
It's a metaphor, Wellsy.
Who's the tutor here?
Okay, whatever. Is there a phase two?
Offensive zone pressure.
Find opportunities to crash the crease
and look for rebounds.
[Hannah]
Sure. Crash. Crease. Rebounds. Totally.
[Garrett] We showboat our relationship
in front of crowds, in front of Justin,
and especially in front of Jules,
whenever we can.
[Hannah] And phase three?
We break up, you cry.
You expect me to cry over you?
Yeah. Oh, yeah.
Wellsy, this fake relationship
is going to destroy you.
I mean, your life will never
be the same again.
And then, Justin will swoop in
and pick up all the pieces.
You're gonna fake cry over me, too, right?
Oh, I'll be inconsolable.
Well, that part I like.
You gotta admit, it's kind of genius.
So, when do we start?
♪I said, are you gonna be my girl♪
-[loud pop music playing]
-[video game playing on TV]
[music continues]
[Logan] Pause it, guys.
Hi. I'm…
Hannah, right?
Garrett's tutor?
Yeah, sorry it took me so long.
No one ever really knocks.
[Simms exclaims in Czech]
Dude, I told you to pause it.
-There's no pausing in hockey.
-Bullshit.
You get gassed after, like, a minute.
[Simms] You guys take pauses all the time.
I'm the one out there all the time.
[Tucker]
To be fair, you just stay in one spot.
[Simms speaking Czech]
[Tucker] You gotta work on
your transitions, bro.
Honestly, I'm doing better
without you, so…
Fuck you. I'm carrying your ass.
Hey.
I'm Jules.
Pillow chucker's sibling.
Who are you? What's your deal?
Careful, don't tell Jules anything
you don't want the whole school knowing.
I only report the facts.
Wellsy.
Hey.
We can study in my room.
Uh, down here is fine.
No, no, it's better up there. No worries.
Jules.
[indistinct squabbling]
Semi-nudity was not part of the deal.
Oh, please. Don't flatter yourself.
It's for Jules' benefit, not yours.
-[woman laughing]
-Dean, dude,
I told you
to shut your fucking door, man.
-We have company.
-[giggling]
Sorry about him.
He's a heathen.
This is me.
[both laughing]
Okay, uh,
for your oral presentation,
you're gonna have to argue the viewpoints
of one of our first unit philosophers
and how they relate to modern society.
[cell phone notification chimes]
-What was that?
-[chiming continues]
Oh, nothing.
Just a snap from a puck bunny.
-Is that what you actually call women?
-They call themselves that.
Wait, are people gonna think
I'm a puck bunny?
No one is going to think
you are a puck bunny.
[notifications chime]
Okay, let's just start with Nietzsche.
[notifications continue]
Um, no, actually, I don't need your notes.
Nietzsche believed that morality
was defined by the individual.
God is dead, or whatever.
Kant, on the other hand, was trying
to find what morality was itself.
What the duties and obligations
of the individual were to begin with.
If you know that already,
why do you need my help?
Well, I mean, memorizing is easy, right?
What I don't understand is how
they can be saying different things
and both still be right.
-It's not about being right.
-[notifications chime]
Oh, my God.
[chiming continues]
Okay.
This is Garrett's tutor.
Please leave him alone.
He'll fuck you later.
[Garrett laughs] Damn.
Now I have to fuck her later.
Oh, only if you believe in obligations.
You want my head where?
Just in between my, uh…
Hey, is that even your head?
Doesn't matter.
I'm not doing August 19th.
All right. Uh…
Ooh! June 28th is kind of hot.
You can do a back bend?
No, you're doing the back bend.
I don't know about this.
Okay. Um, yeah.
-I'll just find a better one.
-No, I--
I mean any of this.
The calendar, the sex positions.
Do you not like what we've been doing?
No, I just, like, thought it might be fun
to try something different.
You know, I just-- After two years, I
don't want us getting boring.
Our sex is boring?
No, no. I didn't--
We're just a little predictable, is all.
I mean, like, we do the same things,
and we see the same people,
and we break up and get back together.
Like, I'm just trying to shake us
out of our routine here.
I like our routine.
Okay, not the break-up part,
but the rest of it is…
We see the same people
because we're in college.
We eat at the same places
because we're in college.
Life's not gonna be like this forever, Al.
Yeah, so let's go out
and hook up on the dance floor
and make out in the back of an Uber.
-We're not those people.
-No, but we could be.
Right?
I mean… don't you want more?
Okay, let me see August 19th again.
No. No, it's fine. Fine.
The usual stuff is fine.
I can put a pillow under your butt.
You said that felt good last time, right?
Yeah.
Yeah, let's just do that.
[Hannah's composition playing]
Okay, what did we love
about Hannah's piece?
[muttering throughout]
Come on. It's Hannah's first time
going for the pop showcase.
How do we help make it stronger?
We're classical comp majors.
We don't do pop.
I commend your intellectual flexibility.
Truly.
Anyone?
It's a nice melody.
There we go. Thank you.
-Aren't there lyrics?
-I haven't finished it yet.
Hannah. Just, uh, try to listen.
Okay.
I think what we are looking for here
is constructive criticism.
Honestly, sounds a lot like
Hannah's film score work.
Background music for someone else's story.
Like you're afraid to really
get under the surface
of what the song wants to be about.
[breathing heavily]
[woman] Just write, Hannah.
I am sure it went better
than you think it did.
No, it really didn't.
Cutting it close, Mr. Graham.
Sorry. Had to stop
and grab coffee for my girl.
[mouthing]
[laughs]
What's in this?
I think you meant to say, "Thanks, baby."
Baby?
So, for those of you
who were remotely paying attention…
Drink the damn coffee.
…you'll remember where we left off…
-I'm lactose intolerant.
-Just pretend.
What, pretend I'm not lactose intolerant?
Hannah…
pretend you like me.
[professor] …how it can be used
to disrupt industries it purports to aid.
These disruptions…
Is he looking? I can't tell.
…vary in both severity and morality.
Nope.
[professor] Now, technology has always
been a driving force in progress…
What about now?
…but what is the morality…
No.
…technology designed solely
to divert wealth…
Okay, well, I can't take notes like this.
Nobody said you had to.
…push back against perceived progress
of those disruptions…
[loud crash]
[clanging]
And that's a great example
of an unwanted disruption.
[students chuckle]
He's looking now.
[Tucker] Don't miss.
-Don't miss.
-I ain't gonna miss.
[Tucker]
Don't miss. Don't miss. Don't miss.
Oh!
Fuck you.
Told you not to miss.
Come on. It wasn't that bad.
It was like a car crash
exploded into a volcano
and then fell down the stairs loudly.
[drumming]
[blowing kazoo]
Hear me! Hear me!
We have a proclamation
Stand by for the proclamation.
[Dean] The annual Maxwell Di Laurentis
birthday festivities
will take place this year
at the Maxwell summer home in…
-Cape Cod.
-[Logan] Whoo!
Thank you.
[Dean]
As it is our 22nd year gracing the earth,
the theme shall be twofers, right?
So please come dressed
as your second-favorite dynamic duo…
after us, of course.
The party bus departs
shortly after the team bus,
which shall bring ye there
and bring ye back the following morning.
Mm-hmm. So be there or…
Be there. There is no other option.
-[Bo] Drumroll, please.
-[Dean] Yes.
[blows kazoo]
[cell phones vibrating and chiming]
[sighs]
-That is all.
-That is all. Thank you.
-That was a lot.
-That's Dean and Bo for you.
They do the same kind of thing every year.
♪I look like a star, I'm shining♪
Wait.
Justin is in Bo's frat.
♪They feel so inclined♪
♪They're asking…♪
I got it.
Gonna need more words.
I'll give you two.
Hard launch.
♪Oh, I'd be jealous♪
♪Oh, I'd be jealous♪
♪Oh, I'd be jealous if I met me too…♪
Hey, I would just like to say
this is the most absolutely unhinged plan,
and I'm obsessed with it.
And you. None of the hockey people know?
Hockey people?
Okay, Jules can't know.
This has to seem real.
[woman]
Is that Garrett Graham?
[woman 2] It is!
[giggling]
Okay, well, you've convinced
half the theater department.
[both chuckle]
We could be Beetlejuice.
What? No, you need to show up
as someone hot.
How dare you? Winona Ryder is beautiful.
Yeah, but she's not hot.
And don't you have any of those boots
that go up past the knee?
You mean "fuck me" boots?
We wear those
when we don't feel like shaving.
[Garrett] Ha. Well, I'm just saying.
I mean, you've got it, so flaunt it.
Okay, don't talk about my "it."
Not all women want to get dressed up
for the male gaze.
Yeah, but the women I'm with do.
Okay, enough. Listen, hockey man,
let's just get one thing straight.
My best friend is right
about literally everything, always,
now until the end of time.
-Thank you.
-But in this case,
you do gotta whip them thighs out.
Judas!
But if you want to get Justin's attention,
we have to be boy hot, not girl hot.
Wait, "we"?
Oh, yeah. Sean and I are coming.
I just decided.
A wild hockey party's exactly what we need
to shake us out of our funk.
You're already in a funk again?
You just got back together.
Even soulmates have ruts.
Or a series of ruts.
Okay, well, it'll be more fun to drive out
to the party with you, anyway.
Yeah, no, you're coming to the game.
That wasn't part of the deal.
Well, if you're into me,
you're into hockey.
[Allie] He's got a point.
And besides, you'll need to spend
the night anyway, right?
For fake sex reasons.
Yeah. Fake sex. So much fake sex.
Ugh! I want to be having fake sex.
You're having real sex.
Whatever. My point is, fake is fun.
Um, okay, what's my deadline
for this costume?
Uh, puck bunny bus leaves
at 4:00 p.m. Saturday.
-You said I'm not a puck bunny.
-You're not.
Doesn't mean you can't act like one.
Mm!
[Logan] Come on.
We dominated the Frozen Four last year
and the year before that.
To all the cocky sons of bitches out there
who think they can beat us,
I'd like to see you--
Give 110%.
-We practice at 110. We--
-Read each other's minds.
-What are you doing tonight? You wanna…
-Give 100%.
And then, um, give ten more.
Could you repeat the question?
[interviewer] How do you plan
to adjust to the challenge
of being Briar's new captain?
I don't think there's a need
to change anything.
My teammates expect
the best out of me,
and that's not a problem,
because I expect the best of myself.
[interviewer] Do you have
any other pregame rituals
or superstitions?
[Garrett]
Yeah, I'm pretty particular…
[calming keyboard music playing]
[distorted sounds playing]
[hockey stick cracks]
[sticks slapping on ice]
[sighs]
Hey.
Can I help you?
Uh, no. I'm here for Garrett.
Oh, I don't usually let girlfriends watch.
Definitely not a girlfriend.
I'm his philosophy tutor.
Oh, then you can stay.
[laughs]
-Not going easy on him, are you?
-No, sir.
Good. Do your best.
We need him out there.
Sorry, can't you just speak
to his professor, or dean, or whatever
if it's so important that he play?
I mean…
He didn't want me to.
What? Why?
Do you know who his dad is?
Some hockey player.
One of the best defensemen
in NHL history.
Garrett's last name carries weight.
He knows the spotlight's on him.
So he busts his ass to prove
that he's earned his place.
[Garrett]
…and build your own identity.
[interviewer] Thanks for your time.
Wait. Hey. I thought we had a session?
Weight room.
["Howlin' for You"
by the Black Keys playing]
Better hurry, Garrett's tutor.
♪All right♪
♪Yeah♪
♪I must admit♪
♪I can't explain♪
♪Any of these thoughts
racing through my brain♪
♪It's true♪
♪That, baby, I'm howling for you…♪
Hey, you know I don't appreciate
being made to wait 45 minutes.
I'm sorry. Sitting down for that long
must be so draining.
We'll reschedule.
Okay, okay. Hold on, hold on.
I can multitask.
I'll just be, uh, locking out
while studying Locke.
Really? You can?
Got a lot to cover, and I've never
met a guy who can genuinely do
two things at once.
Well, then you've been sleeping
with the wrong guys, Wellsy.
♪Da-da da-da da, da-da da-da da♪
♪Da-da da-da da…♪
That was a joke.
Jesus.
If we're gonna convince anyone
that we're hooking up,
you can't freak out when I tease you.
We need to practice.
Practice what? Teasing?
We'll be fine as long as you stop
force-feeding me dairy products.
Forget your oat milk. This is serious.
You blush whenever I come near you.
-Get over yourself. I don't blush.
-[laughs] Oh, yeah?
See?
Nothing.
Not bad.
But what about when we kiss?
You're very sure of yourself.
Oh, right.
Your terms.
No kissing.
What's wrong, Graham?
I thought you said we needed practice.
[seductive percussive music playing]
Don't blush.
[Logan] So, this is tutoring?
What? No.
Uh…
Yes. [laughs]
Uh, he was just trying to prove a point.
It kind of feels like I just did.
And now it's my turn.
I'm gonna kiss you.
[hesitant] Okay.
[sighs]
Am I blushing now?
[door opens and closes]
[rock music playing]
It's here, folks.
Our first away game of the season.
The Briar Hawks have dominated
the Chatham Clovers in the past,
but since it's Di Laurentis's
birthday today,
we all know his mind
is already on the after-party.
Am I right?
But, we've got a good crowd here tonight.
Briar's most faithful bunnies
in attendance, as always.
[excited chatter]
First game?
-Yeah.
-I know we can seem like a lot,
but we don't bite, I swear.
Just stick by Jules.
I mean, their play-by-play
was a lifesaver my first time.
Thanks.
[laughs]
[whistle blows]
[Dean] Let's go! You got this, boys!
-Come on, now.
-This is a tough game for the Clovers.
-[player] Hey! Hey!
-[man] Graham! Graham!
[Garrett] Let's fucking go!
[slamming]
[man] Come on, baby!
Hey! Hey, chief! I'm open! I'm open!
All right, here we go.
-[Jules] Briar has control of the puck.
-Logan!
-[Jules] Logan back to Graham.
-Move it! Move it!
[Jules] Graham back to Logan.
Passing it back and forth
like chlamydia during Welcome Week.
Come on, guys.
Let someone else have a turn. It's fair.
[Garrett]
Go. Go. Top! Come on, baby!
Denied! Damn, so close.
Chatham tries to get the puck
the fuck out of town.
[player 1] Yeah, baby!
But Graham's right there
with the interception.
[player 1] Come on, G, pass it up.
-[player 2] Here! Over here! Come on!
-[player 1] Good. Take it up!
[Jules] Graham takes it alone. In…
-[buzzer sounds]
-Yes!
[all cheer]
[player] Goal!
[Jules] Hawks absolutely pounding
the Chatham Clovers.
-[excited chatter]
-All day! All day! Whoo!
He's good.
Yeah.
Problem is, he knows it.
[crowd chanting]
Hawks! Hawks! Hawks!
Fuck 'em up! Fuck 'em up!
Hawks! Hawks! Hawks!
Fuck 'em up! Fuck 'em up!
Hawks! Hawks! Hawks!
Fuck 'em up! Fuck 'em up!
Hawks! Hawks! Hawks!
[all cheering]
[roars]
Alright, Deany, baby.
-Hey.
-Let's go, set 'em up for them.
[all cheer]
-And-- [chuckles]
-Right here.
Ca-caw!
[all] Oh!
You fucking douche!
Hey! Zamboni!
-Seriously?
-Hey, waste not,
lest he be wasted.
-Come on.
-[all chanting] Zamboni!
Zamboni!
Zamboni! Zamboni! Zamboni!
Zamboni! Zamboni!
[all cheer]
[cheers and applause]
-Goose!
-Maverick!
-Come out!
-Come on, baby!
-Oh!
-Oh, boy.
["Deeply Still in Love"
by ROLE MODEL playing]
♪But it still bleeds♪
♪I'm sorry, but I'm deeply still in love♪
♪In love with you now♪
♪Yes, ma'am♪
♪Oh, yeah♪
♪Well, I heard…♪
[chuckles]
♪I still can't swallow it…♪
-What?
-Holy shit.
I mean…
you totally nailed boy hot.
Good, because I feel like
an absolute cliché.
Any sign of Justin?
No. Not yet. But he'll be here.
Sig Tau takes birthdays very seriously.
[party-goer]
Yo, Garrett.
Oh, hey. Thanks, man.
Oh, no, thanks. I don't drink at parties.
Oh, yeah?
No worries, I'm not a big drinker either.
One on practice nights,
five after a game, no exceptions.
Seems pretty strict.
Do you think I was born with these abs?
-So, what's next?
-It's your favorite, actually.
Are you ready for this?
♪I'm sorry, but I'm deeply still in love♪
♪In love with you…♪
[Tucker] Hockey shots!
-[partygoer] Whoo!
-Garrett, hockey shots.
Oh, shit. Yeah, I get it now.
-You're not a vampire.
-I am.
Yeah, sorry, Garrett's tutor,
but we need you, let's go.
It's a starting line tradition
when we win.
Bad luck if we don't.
Exactly, so we're doing it
because we beat Chatham's asses.
-That's right.
-[Tucker] Let's go.
-All right, come on.
-Come on! Come on!
Sorry.
[laughing] It's okay.
♪I'm sorry, but I'm deeply still in love…♪
[partygoers chanting]
Fuck them up! Fuck them up!
-Fuck them up! Fuck them up!
-You ready? Let's go.
-Come on.
-Fuck them up! Fuck them up!
[all cheer]
[inaudible]
[cheering fades]
[ominous music playing]
[Jules] Not a vampire.
Uh… what?
Garrett.
We all thought he was just
a very bad vampire,
but here you are looking like Elle Woods.
And you're Peter Pan's shadow?
Yeah, Peter's around here somewhere.
There's just one thing
I can't quite figure out.
Garrett Graham doesn't do girlfriends.
Dynamic duo's not his style.
Even when it is the theme.
So, Garrett's "tutor,"
what's really going on?
["like JENNIE" by JENNIE playing]
[boisterous shouting]
[car horn blaring]
Someone already blocked me in.
Come on, it looks so fun.
♪Special edition
and your AI couldn't copy♪
[music continues indistinctly]
Hey, babe, where's your Dunkin' cup?
Uh, must have left it in the car.
Okay, well, without the cup
you don't look like Ben Affleck.
You just look like
some sad guy from Boston.
So, Ben Affleck?
Babe, get the cup.
So we can dance.
-Do we have to?
-Yes!
A house like this? A floor like that?
A dress like mine?
Come on.
Okay, I'll find the cup.
Thank you.
[squeals]
You know, it's sort of tutoring,
but have you looked at him?
I mean, he's John's best friend,
so not really.
-John?
-My brother, John Logan.
Right. Um, but I mean, objectively,
Garrett's a reasonably
attractive-looking human being
and sparks flew as they do
when people, um…
Sorry, what-what don't you get?
Any of it, really.
Because a guy like him couldn't possibly
be into a girl like me?
Oh, my God, no. You're just… different.
Not what I would have expected
for Garrett.
[bottle cap tinks]
So are you guys, like, "dating," dating?
Well, I mean, we're not, like,
exclusive or anything.
And she's cool with that?
Yeah, man. I guess so.
[chuckles]
It's just that last week,
you didn't even know her name, right?
[laughs]
Yeah, you know, I don't know.
Sometimes, people sneak up on you.
Hmm.
Jesus. Do you see anything non-alcoholic?
It's for Hannah.
She doesn't drink.
She said not at parties.
Oh.
[boisterous cheering]
Cute. Uh…
Here, try this.
Closed cans are safer, bro.
Thanks.
Go be the hero.
I can say this because Garrett's
basically my brother,
but he can be kind of a dick sometimes.
You know that, right?
Yeah, but, I mean, he's also funny
and really hardworking.
Kind of nice when he wants to be.
Hey, uh, sorry that took so long.
I couldn't find any mixers.
But I thought maybe…
I don't know.
You know, in case you change your mind.
No pressure, though.
Yeah, actually, thanks.
♪Oh, I can't see straight
and my hands are tied♪
♪I could be your type
from your zombie bite♪
♪No, I can't see straight
but the feeling's right…♪
Okay.
That was totally cute.
My single ass needs another drink.
[laughs]
Bye, Jules.
♪You zombie boy…♪
-Good work. Really.
-Thanks.
♪Like a lion on the hunt
for this kitten over here♪
♪This kitten over here♪
♪Bar is getting dry
and you staring at the sunrise♪
♪Bet you're thirsty over there
bet you're thirsty over there♪
♪'Cause you're an animal, an animal♪
♪And you're closing in on me♪
♪You animal♪
♪Yeah, you're an animal, an animal♪
♪And it just can't be this way♪
♪Oh, I can't see straight
and my hands are tied♪
♪I could be your type
from your zombie bite♪
♪No, I can't see straight
but the feeling's right…♪
Yo, Dean, can you do me a favor
and take one of these off my hands?
Who is that?
Whoa.
I don't know her personally,
but I'm pretty sure that's JLo.
That's really helpful. Yeah.
I got an idea.
["On the Floor"
by Jennifer Lopez playing]
Oh, my God! Wait, this is me!
Now!
[squeals]
Who says you're struggling
with your assists, huh?
I can still change the song, dick.
♪To my party people in the club♪
♪Huh♪
♪If you go hard
you gotta get on the floor♪
♪If you're a party freak
then step on the floor♪
♪If you're an animal
then tear up the floor♪
♪Break a sweat on the floor
yeah, we work on the floor♪
♪Don't stop, keep it moving
put your drinks up♪
♪Pick your body up
and drop it on the floor♪
♪Let the rhythm change
your world on the floor♪
♪You know we're running shit
tonight on the floor♪
♪Brazil, Morocco, London to Ibiza♪
♪Straight to LA, New York,
Vegas to Africa♪
♪Dance the night away♪
♪Live your life and stay young
on the floor♪
♪Dance the night away♪
♪Grab somebody, drink a little more♪
♪Tonight we gonna get on the floor♪
♪Tonight we gonna get on the floor♪
Should we dance or what?
[percussive music playing]
Oh, my God. Justin's here.
Okay, be cool. You're with me.
Hey, he's just another guy.
All right?
[boisterous chatter continues]
Is he looking?
Oh, yeah.
Come on.
What?
Where are we going?
He needs to see us.
And he has. You've got him interested.
Now we've gotta go.
But he's talking to someone.
Hey, watch the player,
not the puck, Wellsy.
What the hell does that mean?
It means trust me.
This is the part…
where I tell you all the things
I want to do to you
when we're alone.
Now…
you can blush.
["OMG" by Suki Waterhouse playing]
Okay.
♪When I got lost in all these dreams♪
♪See myself, but it's not me♪
♪I'm with the crowd, I cannot breathe♪
♪My baby's no good for me♪
♪No good for me, no--♪
[music stops]
Oh, thank God. I'm exhausted.
Oh!
You're not letting me take the bed?
[sighs]
Nope.
Sorry for thinking you were a gentleman.
Apology accepted.
I'm not sleeping on the floor.
[chuckles]
Well, that really sounds like a pickle.
You can't just decide.
-That's funny, seems like I just did.
-Oh, my God, you're so stubborn.
[laughs]
You know the bed is big enough for two.
Absolutely not.
Okay, your loss.
Whoa.
You're beat to shit.
Am I?
Yeah, I guess I hadn't noticed.
No, okay, you're right.
You should take the bed.
Wait. No.
-No?
-No.
You're just giving me the bed
because you feel bad for me.
Get back on the bed.
I'm taking the floor.
I don't need your pity. It's all yours.
See you in the morning.
You just collapsed on it two seconds ago.
Take it.
I am perfectly capable
of sleeping on the floor.
So am I.
[laughs]
What?
Nothing.
You can't actually laugh out loud
and not share the goods.
[cell phone vibrates]
[whimpering]
[both laugh]
[notifications chime]
[dog panting]
Impressive.
The Bruins should hire him
to be their mascot.
Do you always get so beat up out there?
Ah, you get used to it.
Hurt more when I was starting out.
How old were you?
-When I started playing?
-Mm.
I don't know. As soon as I could walk,
my dad put skates on me.
That's a lot of pressure on a kid.
Skating was the fun part.
The pressure was…
getting measured once a week to make sure
that I was growing fast enough.
Chugging protein shakes and…
lifting weights.
Missing birthday parties
because my dad wouldn't let me
skip practice.
And his fucking whistle
whenever I made a mistake.
Why do you still do it?
I guess…
I wouldn't know who I am without it.
I spent my whole life
training for a dream,
and I'm so close to it.
If I stopped, I…
I don't know.
That makes sense.
Seems like you never really had a choice.
Yeah. Right.
Fuck that.
Yeah.
Yeah. Fuck that.
You got to practice with the Bruins?
They let me run a drill for fun.
It wasn't that big of a deal, you stalker.
♪Page one…♪
Oh, my God, no. Turn that off.
That's so embarrassing.
[laughs]
♪All that's happened♪
♪Then on♪
♪To the first chapter♪
♪Everyone's happy♪
♪For shadowing impending disaster♪
♪Then girl meets boy♪
♪It's awkward, confusing♪
♪Can't tell if it's love or it's hate♪
♪Wet hands graze♪
-♪Reaching for something…♪
-Did you write this?
It's incredible.
In high school.
♪Now it's a love story♪
♪Of epic proportion♪
♪The likes of which never has been told♪
You're really good.
♪Two hearts beating as one♪
♪Run right into the sun♪
♪Oh, what would I give to go back?♪
♪Back to page one♪
I gotta tell you something.
The other night, at the Eastwood game…
I was…
struggling.
And then…
I heard someone singing.
Elton John.
Right?
I followed your voice
through the tunnels.
[laughs]
I saw you in the green room.
Saying it out loud,
I realize that sounds creepy, but…
[laughs]
…you were so…
like, genuine, you know?
And free.
You centered me.
[cell phone notification chimes]
[sighs]
Jules posted us.
Wait, what did they say?
Actually, hang on, let me see.
[laughs] We did it.
Yeah, we did it.
Wait, I have just the thing.
Have you heard Miley's cover
of "The Bitch Is Back"?
Yeah, of course.
I'm a man of taste, Wellsy.
Okay, well, what about
Billy Porter's version?
Who's Billy Porter?
Gonna pretend you didn't just say that.
Come up here.
[scoffs]
Will you show me something of yours?
What, like a classical piece?
No, like the one on your Instagram.
Uh, no. I--
I don't write like that anymore.
That's crazy.
Why not?
It's like scary…
telling the world something
I'm not ready for it to know.
Uh, but I am working on something
at the moment
for the pop showcase,
but it's not there yet.
Lyrics are hard for me.
It'll get there.
It has to. I need to win.
You hate losing that badly, huh?
I do, when it means that I can't afford
to go to Briar anymore,
which is what'll happen
if I don't get a scholarship.
And the only way to get the scholarship--
Is to win?
Do you have to write the lyrics yourself?
Can you collaborate?
Yeah, sure. As long as it's still mine.
[typing]
[rock music playing onscreen]
♪We built a bridge and burned it down…♪
I mean, there's your answer.
-[laughs] Justin?
-Yeah.
I mean, just ask him for help.
Pretentious douches love that shit.
He is not a pretentious douche.
Okay, yeah. Whatever you say.
♪Constantly concealing♪
♪What we'll never be♪
♪So here is the lie you want♪
♪It tastes much sweeter than…♪
Wait have you heard of the Beaches?
Mm-mm.
Their Coachella set will change your life.
[both laugh]
[typing]
[gentle romantic music playing]
[crickets chirping]
-Oh, we just made it.
-That was close.
[Garrett] Coach.
Hannah.
Hi. Hey.
Justin.
[laughs] Yeah.
This seat taken?
-No.
-Yeah? Cool.
[gentle romantic music continues]
[inaudible]
[inhales sharply]
♪She's a fire sign♪
♪And I don't really know
what that means♪
♪I'm a cold night♪
♪And I wanna be close to the heat♪
♪I don't want to get burned♪
♪I don't want love like that♪
♪But I can't go any further
Till I start coming back♪
♪I'm a rock star♪
♪And I'm never around when you need♪
♪Like a race car♪
♪Driving away from the scene♪
♪Does she want me to stay?♪
♪Does she want me to pack?♪
♪You can't push me any further
till I start coming back♪
♪Turn me around, right upside down♪
♪Spin me like a globe
and drop your finger on me♪
♪I feel so far♪
♪You're all I want♪
♪Spin me like a globe
and drop your finger on me♪
♪You push me in circles♪
♪To the edge of the Earth♪
♪Where I can't go any further♪
♪Till I start coming back to you♪
♪I'm an addict♪
♪I'm addicted to her into me♪
♪She's a magnet♪
♪Pulling me under the sheets♪
♪If I hold you too close♪
♪Will the good things still grow?♪
♪Don't matter what happens♪
♪Wherever we end up
we'll come right back♪
♪Turn me around♪
♪Right upside down♪
♪Spin me like a globe
and drop your finger on me♪
♪I feel so far♪
♪You're all I want♪
♪Spin me like a globe
and drop your finger on me♪
♪You push me in circles♪
♪To the edge of the Earth♪
♪Where I can't go any further♪
♪Till I start coming back to you♪
♪Turn me around♪
♪Right upside down♪
♪Spin me like a globe♪
♪And drop your finger on me♪
♪I feel so far, you're all I want♪
♪Spin me like a globe♪
♪And drop your finger on me♪
♪Turn me around♪
♪Right upside down♪
♪Spin me like a globe♪
♪And drop your finger on me♪
♪I feel so far, you're all I want♪
♪Spin me like a globe♪
♪And drop your finger on me♪
♪You push me in circles…♪