9-1-1: Lone Star (2020) s03e11 Episode Script

Prince Albert in a Can

1 I'm right here with you, ma'am.
We're gonna get some help to you.
Can you tell me the address of where you're at? 660 Monte Vista.
He's gone crazy.
I'm sending police to you now.
What's your name, ma'am? It's Susie.
I've got my baby here too.
Listen, my name is Grace.
Do me a favor.
Take a deep breath.
Tell me what's going on.
Who's trying to hurt you? My boyfriend.
His name's Mark.
Mark Poling.
He's tweaked out of his mind.
You're saying he's on methamphetamines? Yes.
He, he deals it.
- Is he armed? - I don't know.
He has this bunch of guns in the house.
He just started smashing and throwing things.
He said that he's gonna kill us! I know you're scared, but I need you to try and stay calm for me.
Are you two somewhere safe right now? We're hiding in a closet.
Well, let's try to keep your voice down, ma'am.
Susie, I need to know where in the house the closet is so that my team can find you.
We're in the back bedroom at the end of the hallway to the left.
I I think I hear him.
Hush, honey, please.
Please hush.
I smell gas.
I think he's pouring gasoline.
Oh, God.
He meant it.
He said he would burn us both alive! He's gonna set the house on fire! Hey! Hey! Susie? Susie, can you hear me? Go, go, go, go! I want every street within four blocks of here locked down.
Officers, take the south side of the residence, keep the neighbors inside.
Last thing we need is a looky-loo getting caught in a crossfire.
Yes, sir.
- Officer Reyes.
- Captain Strand.
We believe we have an armed suspect inside with two possible hostages, one of them an infant.
Do we know their status? No.
Suspect's radio silent.
Won't answer his phone, or any calls from my negotiators.
I need your teams to set up behind the truck until SWAT goes in and secures the scene.
Fire should go in with you.
No way.
Dispatch said the suspect is a heavily armed meth-head.
They also said that the place is filled with gasoline.
One stray round, that thing goes up, you guys are trapped in an inferno.
Just stay behind us.
You travel light as you can.
Sergeant, kit these boys up with vests and helmets.
- Yes, sir.
- Alright.
Halligans and fire extinguishers only.
Get an inch-and-three-quarter line as backup.
If that thing goes up, we're in there fast.
Let's go.
Move, move, move! Suspect is a white male.
Keep your eyes open.
Move, move, move.
This is APD.
Come out if you're here.
Eyes peeled.
Eyes peeled! - Bedroom's clear.
- Bathroom clear! Three-six-three-H-20.
I have eyes on a male in a hoodie, who appears to have just exited the rear of the house on Plainview.
Suspect's heading east.
In pursuit.
Copy, three-six-three-H-20.
I'm sending a ride your way now.
Carlos, be careful.
Check the windows.
Anyone here? Man, this is just creepy.
Hey, Cap, dispatch said that they heard a baby crying on the call.
Yeah, I don't hear no baby crying.
Police! Freeze! - What's going on, man? - Mark Poling? Where's your girlfriend, Mark? What? Amber? She's she's gone.
What do you mean gone? Gone where? I don't know, man.
Did you hurt her, Mark? When? I didn't do anything.
I don't reckon nobody's hiding in there.
Dispatch, I think we've been had.
Excuse me? There was never anybody in this closet and there's no sign of babies in this house.
Oh, no.
Officer Reyes, do you copy? Mark, look at me.
I need you to put the knife down.
Officer Reyes, this is dispatch.
Please come through.
Mark, I need you to put the knife down.
This is so messed up.
- Officer Reyes - Did she call you guys? Hey, I need you to put that knife down! I didn't do nothing.
I don't know what's going on.
Drop your weapon! - I'm not doing anything.
- Put the knife down! Put your weapon down, Mark.
- I didn't do nothin', okay? - Put the weapon down! Right now! Put the knife down! I didn't do nothing.
I didn't Taser.
Dispatch, suspect was armed with a knife.
I deployed my Taser.
Taking him to custody now.
Let's go, turn around.
Mark, come on.
Let's go.
Dispatch, code three.
I need EMS assistance right now.
Major knife injury.
There's a lot of blood.
Officer Reyes, are you hurt? Not me.
Suspect fell on his own knife.
Copy you, Officer Reyes.
RAs are already on the scene.
They're on their way.
Stay with me.
Alright? Carlos, Carlos? Carlos, we got it.
He fell on his knife.
- He wouldn't drop it.
- It's okay.
- Tommy, he wouldn't drop it.
- Alright.
- I didn't mean I didn't mean to.
- It's okay.
Please save him.
- It's alright.
It's alright.
- Please save him.
Losing his pulse.
He's not breathing, Cap.
Starting compressions now.
What happened? He fell on his own knife.
Tell me you guys found the girlfriend and the baby.
- What? - There were no victims.
- What do you mean? - He was alone in that house.
It looks like the whole thing was a prank.
A prank? Dispatch, call the medical examiner.
He's gone.
The itsy-bitsy spider went up the water Bop.
Down came the Hey.
Hey, family.
How'd it go with the brass? It was decided I should probably take a little time off.
Man, come on.
They're gonna try to lay this at your feet? No, it was nothing like that.
Um It turns out the guy who died, he he was a known dealer.
So APD thinks a rival made the call.
They do that to each other sometimes.
Sic the cops on each other, trying to settle scores.
It's called swatting.
So they know who did it? Mm-mmm.
The call was routed through a fake IP address.
No, I guess what I'm saying is that everybody is in agreement that it ain't your fault? Yeah.
Nobody's blaming me.
I was cleared of all responsibility.
So why are you suspended? I wasn't suspended.
I took a leave of absence.
So it ain't that nobody's blaming you, it's that you're blaming yourself.
I said I can't trust myself right now.
Because there were signs there.
And I missed all of 'em.
Sweetie, what do you mean signs? What are you talkin' about? The caller said that the guy was smashing stuff that he was gonna kill her.
I didn't ask how she got away from him after that to hide in that closet without him knowing.
I heard her baby cry.
And every suspicion I had just went out the window.
Grace, it ain't your job to be suspicious.
It's a job to help people.
I didn't help anybody.
I got a man killed.
I think that it's perfectly natural, you know, for you to get the yips after somethin' like this.
But I also want you to know you're the best dispatcher in the state of Texas.
And we can't abide you being mad at yourself.
I just don't know who else to be mad at.
Well, how about the SOB who, who turned you into a weapon? You know, it ain't you and it ain't Carlos.
It was whoever was on the other end of that line that killed him.
I forgot about Carlos.
You were with him on the scene when that guy died? Yeah.
How did he look? He looked the way you look right now.
Y'all gonna make me lose my mind Up in here, up in here Babe, I know you're going through it, but can you please tone down the rage punching just a little bit? I'm not rage punching.
Thank God, there's the bell.
Round's over.
You gonna get that, Raging Bull? Not raging.
- Hey.
- Grace.
Can I come in? Yes.
I'm sorry.
Come in.
- Hi, TK.
- Hey, you.
Oh, am I interrupting lunch? Oh, no, this isn't lunch.
He eats, like, six times a day.
Did something happen? Yeah, Carlos.
We got played.
That's what happened.
And I don't know about you, but I'm angry about it.
I'm frustrated, too.
Yeah, but I didn't say I was frustrated, Carlos.
I said I was angry.
I'm furious.
I'm-I'm pissed off about it.
Oh, he's pissed, Grace.
Yeah, he should be.
We were played for some fools and a man is dead 'cause of it.
Yeah, okay.
I guess I'm kind of pissed off about that.
You realize that this wasn't your fault, right? Yeah, that's that's what I keep trying to tell myself.
Well, good.
Good, because I'm telling you, too.
This was not on you or me.
Then why does it feel like it is? Because somebody came and took our power away.
That's why it feels like this.
And what are we supposed to do about it? We take it back.
Lets me and you go out here and find out who's actually responsible for this.
'Cause it's not us.
Grace, I'm I'm on mandatory leave from the department while they investigate.
Okay, that's good.
That means you got some time.
APD's already all over it.
They got three detectives.
Someone from Cyber assigned to the case.
And how many cases do they already have, Carlos? Because I don't know about you, but this is the only meal that I can eat right now.
Grace, I'm a patrol officer, not a detective.
Yeah, says the guy who just solved a kidnapping case.
Carlos, you have skills but you've also got something else.
You? You've got rage.
I like the hat.
Well, you gotta have a hat at a honky-tonk.
Come on.
Thanks for dragging me out tonight.
I really needed this.
- Rough week at the Capitol? - Hmm.
We had to balance the state budget.
I was hoping to use a scalpel, but the governor pulled out a machete.
For what it's worth, I once balanced a budget so well that it shut down my own firehouse.
Well, at least you didn't go on cable news afterwards to sell the public.
Yeah, I don't have the cheekbones for prime time.
Oh, I think you do.
And you also have that whole John Travolta "Midnight Cowboy" vibe.
I think you mean "Urban Cowboy"? "Midnight Cowboy" is a movie about male prostitution.
"I'm walking here!" Right.
I-I can never keep those straight.
Wanna dance? I d I don't really know how.
Come on, I'll teach you.
Uh I-I should warn you.
I have the rhythm of a flat tire.
You don't have to have rhythm to two-step.
It's just quick-quick, slow-slow, quick-quick.
- Just follow me, you'll be fine.
- Okay.
And tellin' those sweet lies And losin' again I was lookin' for love in all the wrong places Lookin' for love in too many faces This is pretty fun.
You haven't even gotten to the fun part yet.
Wait, you're not gonna twirl me Oh.
It's happening Hoping to find a friend and a lover I'll bless the day I discover another heart Lookin' for love God help me if any registered voters saw me taking two-step lessons from a New Yorker.
Uh, I'm from Santa Monica, actually.
Oh, great.
Even better.
You're from Texas, and this is the first time you two-stepped.
I never had much interest.
Besides, I spent most of my prime dancing years with my nose buried in Con Law books and reports on highway infrastructure.
Well, from what I just saw, your prime is ahead of you.
Hey, you're her.
Yeah, I seen you on the news.
You're the lady that works for the governor, huh? I'm her.
You're like, uh, like a little Ann Coulter 2.
Except without any kinda warmth or compassion to ya.
Good one.
Hey, man, I'm just trying to have a drink with my friend.
Oh, that's fine.
Yeah, I'm just over here trying to earn a living for my family, too.
Just like all the thousands of other oilmen in this state that you and your boss clearly don't give a damn about.
Hey, pal? She's off the clock.
Hey, it's fine.
I'm used to it.
My father was a roughneck from Midland, believe me, we care about the people who keep the lights on.
Well, you sure could have fooled me with all that clean energy initiative B.
It's time for you to mosey on.
Okay, Owen, just relax.
I've got this.
You think you're so smart, don't you? You can dress up in your power suit and your high heels and go on Fox and CNN, but at the end of the day, you are nothing but a smug piece of Oh! I warned him.
- You did.
- I warned him.
Just be glad nobody wanted to press charges.
That's true.
And this date didn't end in a high-speed chase.
I mean, I can't decide whether that's a step up or a step down.
I can't really tell.
Oh, come on, Catherine.
You can't let some meathead ruin the whole rest of our evening.
And which meathead would you be referring to? You're talking about me? Well, why aren't you mad at that guy? Because I don't know that guy.
And I asked you not to do anything.
Twice, actually.
And then he called you something I'm not comfortable with him calling you.
Uh, who cares what you're comfortable with? It wasn't about you.
You should have just let it go, like I said.
So you'd rather have me stand back as a coward while you're bullied by a drunk? I would rather you let me handle my business like a grown-up.
But one thing I would definitely not rather is you sucker punching one of my boss' constituents.
Sucker punch? Oh, please.
You call that a sucker punch? Both of our shoulders were clearly squared.
Boy, you you really don't get it, do you? No, I-I get it.
I just think that maybe your anger is a little misplaced.
Oh, go on, Owen.
Please tell me more about what I should be feeling.
Do you think this is the first time that somebody's come at me in public? Most days vitriol comes with my morning latte.
Vitriol or spit.
- Spit? - My point is, if I didn't have skin like rawhide, I wouldn't have this job.
So I don't need you or anyone else to defend me, okay? Okay.
I know you're in the business of saving people I did not ask to be saved.
My buddy in Homicide slipped me the case file.
Everything they know about the deceased Mark Poling and the investigation so far.
And they're definitely operating on the theory it's drug-related.
- Okay.
- Right now they're circling a few possibles.
Amber Harris, Mark's ex-girlfriend, Isaac "Herc" Rodriguez.
He's the shot-caller for the Rolling 7s.
And Victor Gaines, he's a rival dealer from Dove Springs.
So what do we know about these people other than the fact that they're all frequent fliers? Amber used to deal with Mark until about a week ago when they broke up.
- Okay.
- But my buddy doesn't like her for it.
She seemed devastated by his death.
I see.
And Rodriguez was in Hays County lockup the night of the incident, which makes Gaines our lead horse.
He could have had a female accomplice to make the call.
Apparently, he and Poling were beefing about territory.
And get this, he was convicted twice for making swatting calls.
Well, you know, you could have led with that tidbit, Carlos.
Well, you know, I like to set up the board before I utilize the moving pieces.
But just listen to these tapes.
What's your emergency? Yeah, my name's Gary Lopez.
5-2-2-6 Howard Drive.
What's going on, Gary? What's going on is my wife is a cheating whore, and I want the whole world to know it.
That's why I have to blow her freakin' brains out! Officers stormed the house, found Gary Lopez taking a nap next to his boyfriend.
And five kilos of weed.
- Can you play the next one for me? - Mm-hmm.
9-1-1, what's your emergency? My girlfriend's a cheating skank and I'm gonna blow her freakin' brains out! Hold on, sir.
Can you tell me where you are? Gaines is a one-trick pony, Carlos.
Yeah, not exactly Pacino, is he? Where did it say he made those calls from? From pay phones.
I didn't even know pay phones were still a thing.
Our caller spoofed their IP address, bounced the call across, I don't know, three different servers.
And they gave an award-winning performance with a baby crying on cue.
Doesn't seem like they're in the same league, does it? No.
Alright, hon, I just put Charlie down.
I'm headin' to work.
Okay, babe.
You be safe.
How's the gumshoeing going? It's all gum and no shoe right now.
It looks like we just ran out of suspects.
Drug angle is a bust.
Y'all tried the gaming angle? There's a gaming angle? The guy was playing "Dread Ops" when we went in there with a top-of-the-line gaming rig and, you know, camera for streaming and everything.
You think someone would swat Mark's house over a video game? People talk all kinds of trash about rival streamers.
It gets, uh, pretty nasty, especially if you got a few thousand people watching but not when it's your boy, though.
Says a man that once threw a controller through our flat screen.
No, I told you it was a slip of my wrist, but What did you say the name of the game was? "Dread Ops.
" If you picture an open sewer filled with trolls.
"Dread Ops.
" Looks like it's time to go play in the sewer.
Hey, Paul, what are you up to? Alphabetizing the spice rack.
Why would you alphabetize a spice rack? To organize it? It was organized.
Okay, then why did I find the coriander next to the za'atar? Because I organize mine by flavor profile.
Those two are staples of Mediterranean cooking.
Flavor profile? Come on, Cap.
That is not a thing.
You know, Paul, when you came back for desk duty, I pictured you behind more of, I don't know, like a desk.
I've been sitting around all morning.
Already collated all the incident reports, and submitted all the house billings for the next month.
I was antsy to do something physical.
Then you can help me put my spices back.
Copy that.
So, togarashis and galangals go back over here.
Whoa, Cap, what happened to your hand? Oh, I think I bumped it.
Probably on that swatting call.
Bumped it? You sure you didn't break it? No, I didn't break it.
- Captain Vega? - Yeah.
Will you please come here and take a look - at Cap Strand's hand? - No, no, no, no, no.
That is completely unnecessary.
Okay, let's see it, Owen.
Owen, let me see it.
- Can you make a fist for me? - Yes.
Are you sure that's not exactly how this happened? Just you making a fist into somebody's face? Captain Strand, please tell me Billy Tyson is not walking around with a black eye right now.
I'll have you know that I did this defending my lady's honor at a honky-tonk last night.
Oh, snap.
You went all John Wayne with some drunk redneck in a bar? The guy was like completely out of line.
And then Catherine blamed me.
What? Why? She said if she wanted somebody to rescue her, she would have asked.
Oh, well.
I can understand that.
Of course, you can.
See, this is why nobody opens doors for anybody anymore.
Well, I'm I'm sorry.
I'm just surprised that, well, such a progressive man as yourself would have such a, a traditional take on this.
Ooh, no, no.
Don't hit me with traditional.
I'm not some old school, you know, Dirty Harry who's just gonna roll up and punch somebody in the face.
I guess that is me.
How do I fix this? Flowers and chocolate.
Those always work.
Oh, that's not traditional? Some traditions never die.
It's official.
- I will never understand women.
- Amen, brother.
Bill, I doubt the governor will be interested in giving a quote to the paper that called him, what was it? "A bloated old steer bellowing to be put out to pasture"? I know it's not your fault.
Catherine Harper? Uh, that's me.
I'm not even saying it's not funny.
Excuse me.
These came for you.
Uh, right here's fine.
Thank you.
I know it's your beat though.
Tell you what.
Give us some love on his new tax cuts for small businesses tomorrow and I'll see what I can do.
Hi to Rosie and the boys.
Oh, my God.
Oh, God! Oh, my God.
How many people still in the Capitol? It's mostly evacuated now.
Is the governor still on-site? Thank God, no.
And the state legislature is in recess.
What can you tell us about the white powder? According to the victim, she was hit with it when she opened a greeting card.
Has the FBI been notified? And the CDC.
Their mobile lab is en route.
The greeting card? Came with a flower delivery.
Well, do you know who delivered it? Anyone who touched it risks exposure.
A mail room employee.
Miss Harper said she'd never seen it before.
- We're looking for him.
- Catherine Harper? The governor's chief of staff, yeah.
Nice lady.
She's self-isolating in her office.
Has she reported any symptoms? - Not yet.
- Okay, 126.
CDC is gonna want us to take samples.
The sooner we do that, the sooner they know what it is, the sooner we can help people.
Alright, full hazmat suits, seal every seal, every zipper.
Some of these powders, a pinprick of 'em will kill you.
So there's no margin for error here.
We'll keep it nice and tight, Cap.
Alright, let's do it.
AFD! - Owen? - Hey.
I'd like to say it's good to see you, but, um it's kinda not.
We're gonna take care of ya.
- Is that the note? - Yeah, it came with the flowers.
I thought maybe you sent them.
- I didn't.
- No.
I-I can feel it on my skin inside my lungs.
I breathed it in, Owen.
I know.
Judd, why don't you bag the note for a sample? - Swab her.
- You got it, Cap.
- Marjan, set up a decon shower.
- I'm on it.
We need to seal this whole area off.
Needs to be completely airtight.
Please open up for me, ma'am.
Thank you so much.
This is Tommy.
She's gonna assess you.
Hey, Catherine.
I'm just gonna check you out real quick.
How long before we find out what this is? You have to take all that to a lab? Lab's coming to us, actually.
This is the Austin Police Department.
You are in extreme danger.
"Men in Black" just pulled up.
Special Agent Eli Barroso, FBI.
Gordon Howard, Capitol Police.
- That the guy we're looking for? - Yeah.
Excuse me.
Can I have your attention, everyone? If you see this guy, holler.
Let us handle it.
- Pass these out.
- There you go.
Please, let's keep it moving, everybody.
Get a good look at him.
Let law enforcement know.
We will handle it.
Vitals are good.
- Blood pressure's stable.
- Oh.
I don't feel so stable.
So stupid.
I I should have known there was something up with that kid.
I had never seen him before, but I-I dropped my guard.
Well, you thought the flowers were from me.
The card said "Now you're really toxic," which doesn't bode well.
Look, we don't know what this is yet.
I had a number of calls just like this back in Manhattan.
And most of the time they were hoaxes.
What about when they weren't? Tell me what I'm looking at here, Owen.
There's no reason to go there.
Not yet.
I need to know.
I can handle it, Owen.
Based on the way that it aerosolized, we could be looking at anthrax or ricin.
What are the symptoms? If it's anthrax, you'll get a fever, muscle aches, your glands will begin to swell.
But we can treat that with antibiotics.
And what about ricin? Within one to four hours, you will have trouble breathing.
You may begin to hemorrhage internally.
Your blood pressure will drop.
And then organ failure.
Uh So what's the treatment for that? There is no treatment.
I see.
I really wish those flowers had been from you.
Me, too.
Everybody, whoever was in the building, if you're feeling lightheaded or dizzy, please let us know.
Hey, do you have any idea how long they're gonna keep us here? My phone's already blowing up with texts from parents.
It's not up to me, sir.
What's happening? I had to park like three blocks away.
It's a terrorist attack.
Hey! Hey, it's you! It's the guy! The guy with the lattes, he's the terrorist! That's him! That's him! Whoa.
I don't know who sent the flowers.
I just delivered them.
I can't believe I captured a terrorist, man.
A terrorist who goes on a coffee run? How come you don't have a Capitol ID? Why is it nobody who works here seems to know who you are? I-I'm a temp.
The flowers, where'd they come from? I don't know.
They were just on the cart.
So they just magically appeared, huh? I didn't say that.
What's going on? You're making me very nervous.
What? Hey.
Medical coming in! - Hey, what do you need? - Grab my bag.
Captain Vega, do you copy? Here, TK.
What's up? They found the kid who delivered the flowers.
They were grilling him.
He started hemorrhaging and then he collapsed.
Hemorrhaging how? Nosebleed.
TK, listen to me.
Get away from him now.
No one comes near him.
Listen Just do it, TK.
Alright, everybody, get back.
Everybody back up.
Get back.
- Get back, get back.
- Back up! Mateo, I want you to cordon off that patient.
Nobody goes near him without a hazmat suit.
He's considered a biohazard.
Are we clear? Yes, sir.
On it.
So, bad news, I'm guessing? Is he dead? I don't know.
We're not gonna jump into conclusions, okay, until we hear from the lab.
I'm so sorry.
You're sorry? Sorry for what? All you wanted was to protect me before and I wouldn't let you.
Now I want nothing more and there's not a thing you can do.
Captain Strand, come in.
Hey, Captain Strand, do you copy? - Go ahead.
- Cornstarch.
Come again.
That powder that they hit your lady with ain't nothin' but cornstarch.
Cornstarch? Cornstarch? TK, do you copy? Yeah, Cap, here.
How's the kid who collapsed doing? - He's still down.
- Is he still bleeding? I-I can't tell.
He's face down.
I need you to check him out.
I thought he was a biohazard.
The situation here has evolved.
On it, Cap.
Cap, bleeding's stopped, but he's still down.
TK, I need you to administer ammonia snaps.
See if you can get him to come around.
Mateo, ammonia snaps.
- Need one? - Yeah.
Right here.
- Oh, my God! - Hey! Cap, he's back.
Tell him he's gonna be just fine.
What just happened? My bet, vasovagal syncope.
Vaso what now? He fainted at the sight of his own blood.
So when do you get off? Are you asking me out? You've already showered.
You're gonna change first, right? Yeah.
What up, nutsacks? - Today we're gonna - Max Giblets? Yeah, that's what he called himself online.
You okay? Yeah, it's just, it's strange seeing him alive.
A lot of you guys avoid the badlands.
But there is always good stuff to be found out here.
I can't believe people stream themselves doing this and other people actually watch it.
Oh, yeah, it's huge.
Some people get sponsorships and everything.
Mark only had a couple dozen followers, but some people have millions.
Look at this potato.
Whoa! Bathe in red mist, biatch! Wasn't exactly a charmer, was he? I mean, no, but he still didn't deserve to die.
No, I, I just mean he's giving us a big new pool of suspects.
Just look at all the trash talk in the comments.
"Uninstall, tweaker.
" "Your mom has better moves.
" - "Burn in hell.
" - Hmm.
Each one's from a different user.
How do we even start narrowing this thing down? You know, Judd said some of these guys have key rivals.
So I think maybe we watch the videos, cross-reference the comments, and then just see if anybody pops up more than once.
And lose a few brain cells while we're at it.
And that.
Oh, my God.
He's using an AK? Okay, so, H8maker6969 says, "You're trash.
" Megalo16 says he's, "Hot trash.
" Oh, my God, I hate these bots! Ballsout120 says, "Suck it, you meth-mouth, cheat queen.
" - Hmm.
- Hold on.
Biatch! Where you gonna go? You think you can hide from me? KimmaMama13 calls him a smurf-ass bitch.
What's a "smurf-ass bitch"? Somebody who plays games under their skill level.
It's not cool at all.
I don't know how they allow it.
- Judd.
He was, he was telling me about.
- Hmm.
Oh, we're doing this again, Megalo16? I've seen Storm Troopers with better aim than you.
You hear that? Yeah, I did.
Megalo16 is one of Mark's trolls.
Sounds like they have a history.
Hold on.
Let me see what I can pull up on his handle.
Sometimes these people use the same one across social networks.
Yeah, it looks like Megalo16 has a gaming stream of his own.
Check out the names of these clips.
"Giblets goes down.
" "Giblets hunt.
" Grace, look at the dates on those.
That's the day Mark died.
Everybody knows Giblets is a rage-quitting, aim-botting bitch boy.
And today, he's gonna get his.
Watch me stalk the unsuspecting prey.
Oh, but first, I gotta deal with this rando.
Boom! Ha, ha, ha! God's plan.
Ah, and another.
Oh! God's plan! Cute catchphrase.
Yeah, that's one word for it.
Oh, where were we? Oh, that's right.
Taking down my favorite bitch boy Giblets.
No way! No! That tweaker trash must have been watching my stream! Come on! Giblets, you cheating piece of Carlos, look at the comments.
Giblets LOL'd him to eternity.
What's the next video? Hold tight, megalomaniacs.
'Cause Giblets' reckoning is nigh.
We know he's tweaked out on meth, 'cause he doesn't hide it.
Now this, stream-sniping bitch boy thinks he can mess up my ranking? Well, the game's about to find him IRL, 'cause I'm sending him a surprise.
Giblets, you're a fly.
A gnat.
An annoying bug.
Do you know what happens to gnats? They get squashed! - Did he just confess? - Yeah, that's what it sounds like.
It's more than enough for a warrant.
Let me see if I can find his real name on his socials.
Hold on.
Here it is.
Looks like his name is Derrick Humphrey.
Any chance there is an address? I'd like to be there for this bust.
Let me check.
Not unless you cool with getting on a plane.
Why? Where is he? Freeze! - Move, move, move.
Hands on your head.
Please don't shoot me! Please don't shoot me! Relax, honey.
Nobody's gonna shoot you.
Douchebag! Boom! Ha, ha, ha! Yeah, that's what's up, baby.
Whoo! You got yourself a real catch.
Boom! God's plan! - What the hell? - Game over, Derrick.
Hands on your head.
Derrick Humphrey, you are under arrest for making a swatting call to Mark Poling of Austin, Texas.
Also for fraud, conspiracy - Ow! - and murder.
What? It was just a joke.
It was just a joke! Not as much fun when SWAT comes knocking at your door, is it? Wait, you got him? Oh, yeah, we got him.
Derrick's girlfriend flipped on him faster than a beachfront condo.
She said they've been making swatting calls all over the country.
These gamers play dirty.
So does that mean that was her voice on the call? Oh, yeah.
She's an aspiring actress.
I think she may have gotten her first agent today.
Of course, he'll be working for the FBI.
What about the baby? They recorded some sounds from the Internet.
Yeah, they got quite the little home studio here.
Sergeant Grant, we we really can't thank you enough.
Seriously, you have no idea how much this means to the both of us.
You guys did all the hard work.
I just showed up for the fun, Detective.
I'm not a detective, actually.
You're kiddin'? You could have fooled me.
Nope, just a patrol officer.
There's no such thing as just a patrol officer, son.
Folks in Austin are lucky to have the both of y'all looking out for them.
Well, listen, if you are ever in town, we'd love to meet you in person.
Well, I would like that.
I'm sorry.
Sergeant Grant, is that our suspect behind you? Yeah, it is.
You mind if we say hey before they transport him? I think that can be arranged.
Just wanna say hey.
Here he is.
Derrick, say hello to my friends Grace and Carlos.
They're the reason your dumb ass is in handcuffs today.
And they didn't have to get off their couch to do it.
You know, I just had to admit, Derrick, you, uh, you really had me fooled.
You had me question myself for the first time.
You were clever.
I didn't think we'd catch you.
You got lucky.
Oh, no, sir.
It wasn't luck.
I can tell you what it was, though.
It was God's plan, bitch.
I like her.
Me, too.
How are you feeling? Good.
This is a lot easier than the two-step.
It's easier on my toes.
Shut up.
You sure you don't wanna get our act back together? We could take it on the road.
There are plenty of honky-tonks that I haven't been trespassed outta.
I think we should stay inside tonight.
- Yeah.
- Feels safer.
It's safe in here.
Oh, I wasn't talking about me.
I just can't risk you punching out any more Travis County voters.
I feel like I'm doing them a service by keeping you indoors.
Has anyone ever told you you might have a slight anger management problem? Hmm.
Only my anger management counselor.
I mean, it's in his best interests to say it.
I am sorry I punched the guy.
I promise that I will not go into full hero mode again.
Well, that would be a shame.
You know, when I saw you coming through those doors today I had one thought running through my mind over and over.
What's that? "Catherine Harper "if you make it out of this alive you are jumping that man's bones.
" Hmm.
Did anybody check him? Did they check who? The guy that I punched that I absolutely shouldn't have, but totally deserved it? Maybe he sent the anthrax.
- Mm.
- Cornstarch, right.
Owen we get, like, 600 pieces of hate mail a day at the Capitol.
The governor has lots of enemies.
But it was addressed to you.
And as someone who advocates for the governor, I have my fair share of enemies, too.
They're mostly kooks.
Generally harmless.
And we have people looking into it.
Can we just leave this all outside tonight? Mm.
What's this about jumping bones? Mm-hmm.
- Oh! - What is it? I guess I'm not the only one with enemies.

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