All Hail King Julien (2014) s05e05 Episode Script

Raiders of the Lord Shark

1 I'm okay! What exactly are we celebrating, again? That it's officially official, Maurice.
The peoples love me.
What do you mean by "official," Your Majesty? Uh, that it's confirmed.
That it's bona-ma-fide.
That it's No, no, yeah.
No, I get what "official" means.
But how did you come to this conclusion exactly? Oh! I hired an outside consultant.
Outside consultant? Uh, as you all know, I am the most popular-est king of all the land.
- Like, all of it.
- Mm-hmm.
Which is why I need to take things to the next level.
Sky god level.
And how exactly do you plan to do that? I'm glad you asked.
With a little help from my consultant, Eloise.
Eloise, meet Clover, Maurice, and Mort! Get off her, you little plantar's wart.
How do you do? Ooh! "How do you do?" Just listen to that accent.
So sophisticated.
So elegant-ile.
Her accent is exactly the same as mine, Your Majesty.
You wish you had an accent.
Tell them about the testing, with the numbers and and the focus.
I specialize in something called "focus testing.
" Oh To put it simply, I analyze a group of people and produce very reliable data.
Data? Oh, I love data! Speaking of data, are the new numbers in? Indeed they are.
Your derriere received a 100% approval rating, Your Highness.
Mm, mm However, your entourage isn't tracking well with the younger demographic.
What? Okay, we have to fix this.
Perhaps you should consider adding a younger member to your entourage, Your Highness, in order to achieve your squad goals.
Squad goals? What you aspire your group of companions to be, of course.
Hmm.
If I am to be as loved as a sky god, I'm gonna need my squad to get on my level.
It is decided.
We will add a younger member.
Ooh! So many to choose from.
Psst.
Todd.
Okay, I'm gonna need everybody to Eh? W-where did they all go? Welcome to the big leagues, Todd.
Mama's proud, baby.
Uh - Hey! - Get out of the way! Xixi here reporting live with breaking news.
King Julien has added a new, younger member to his entourage.
Your Majesty, does this mean That the kingdom is finally going to be on fleek? Oh-ho! You know it, Xix.
What does "fleek" mean? According to children today, it means "on point.
" Both "fly" and "sleek.
" Fleek.
Yeah, just fleekin' it up out here, you know what I'm say Yeah.
Ain't that right, Todd? You know it, homeslice.
Wha wha where you goin', baby? I'm in the entourage now.
Good-bye, Mother.
Todd! Got to let the little bird fly, Tam Tam.
Man! Mmm.
My fingers taste good.
What have I been eating? Okay, so we walked, like, all around the kingdom showing off my boy Todd.
Word's got to be getting around.
How we tracking, L-Weezy? Better, but you're still skewing older.
What? We have Todd.
He's, like, three days old.
It seems that not enough people have been made aware.
Also, your cohorts are coming across a bit selfish and starting to feel repetitive.
- Selfish? - Repetitive? Repet What does that mean? It seems to me that this may be a smaller, older problem.
Hi.
Oh, I see.
Pack your things, Mort.
Clover will escort you out.
Your Majesty, if I could just see the data, I could It would be impossible to comprehend without the proper training.
Uh, data don't lie.
See you, Mort.
No, I can't.
I can't do it.
No, no, no.
I'll get you for this, Todd! Oh, what a bunch of ageists.
How was your day, my little pumpkin seed? I don't want to talk about it.
Oh, that Todd is gonna pay.
If he thinks he can take my life, then I'm just gonna have to take his.
What did you say, my salty potato latke? Nothing.
This is totally whack.
I have major squad updates, and Xixi can't report on it because she has a headache? I concur, Your Highness, and frankly find it unprofessional.
There has to be an easier way for my peoples to know what I am up to all of the times.
Twenty-four sev.
See all the dope things I'm doing and Be like, "Oh, I wish I was as cool as KJ" and feel bad about themselves because they're not.
Timo.
I need a way to get the word out to my peoples about what me and my crew are up to.
Like a newspaper? No, Timo, not like a newspaper.
That's old-school.
Mmm.
I need something new-school.
Something fresh.
Something that says, "Look at me and how sick I am.
" Your Majesty, I-if you're sick, you should see a doctor.
Is it trouble getting out of bed? - You know, I, too, have - Ugh.
Timo! Get with it.
"Sick" means cool.
Well, that's confusing.
Perhaps you should put up a wall beneath the baobab tree and post photos of your face.
No, Timo.
That's just silly.
But what we should do is post photos of my face on a wall beneath the baobab tree.
We will call it "The Facewall.
" Drop the "The.
" Just "Facewall.
" It's cleaner.
Facewall! I only wanted Todd to be famous so we could get our own reality show, and now he's gone off without me.
Hi, Mommy.
It's me, Todd.
I've come home.
Huh? I'm Todd.
It's Todd, Mommy.
Todd! Hungry, baby? Supper's on.
Little girl, bring me some of that Dijon mustard, please.
Tammy steal my man? Ooh Wow.
Fleek.
Whoa.
Fleek.
Fleek.
Fleek.
Fleek.
We're getting so many fleeks.
We are so on fleek.
I wonder how many fleeks the sky gods are getting.
Ba-ba-ba-booyah! The peoples love us.
- Fleek! - Hmm? Ah! That's right, little buddy.
Lou, get an umbrella, because it is rainin' fleeks out there.
That's wonderful news, Your Highness.
We are so hip, it makes me want to hop.
Hip-hop.
I totally get that now.
Todd, buddy, drop a beat.
It's time for a little freestyle.
Huh? Huh? Bravo.
Truly.
The new numbers are in, Your Highness.
Hit me with 'em, L-Money.
The people love all of your witty and ironic posts about kittens.
Yeah! But I'm sorry to report that they find Clover unlikable.
Hey! And they don't think Maurice is funny.
I'm not supposed to be funny.
I'm the voice of reason.
Um How am I supposed to achieve my squad goals like this? Um Look, it's really hard for me to say this.
So I-I think it's best Eloise does it.
Clover, Maurice, the kingdom will no longer be needing your services.
Huh? Oh.
Fleek.
Fleek.
Fleek.
Fleek.
Fleek.
Fleek.
Fleek.
Fleek.
Fleek, fleek, fleek, fleek.
Big things are happening in the kingdom, and I cannot even! King Julien's wall has just been updated with an event, and it appears his new entourage members will be unveiled tonight.
Oh! Freaking out right here.
We're live from the red carpet, where King Julien and his new entourage have arrived.
King Julien is sporting a new chapeau and shades and is followed by Todd.
Ooh, the baby face.
Willie, the one everyone loves to hate.
But I didn't do anything.
And Buck, the party animal.
Is that a banana on your face, or you just happy to see me? It's a beak.
Is it ever, sweetheart.
With a bill like that, I'd dine and dash.
What are you laughing at? Faces like yours make the aye-ayes look like beauty queens.
Oh! Wow! The royal entourage has really stepped up their game.
SquadGoals.
Huh? Todd? Time to practice for the talent competition.
Yes, Mother.
It's a conspiracy.
I can't prove it yet, but the data with the numbers and the testing and the Eloise and "I'm so fancy and posh and very, very English," and the classified Oh, it's just one big conspiracy! Thanks for having me over for dinner, Bronda.
Of course.
With Brodney off running the Aye-Aye Kingdom, it's nice to have a man around.
Sorry.
His musk glands are just developing.
I'll show you development.
Little girl ate all the rhinestones off her costume.
Practice your jokes for Mama, baby.
Yes, Mother.
Hey, what's the deal with trampolines, am I right? It's like, I keep jumping and jumping, but I don't get anywhere.
- Hmm? - Oh, they hate us.
Todd's probably caressing the Feet right now.
Oh! Ask Mr.
Butterfish for one of his chimichangas.
Don't you hate it when all of the voices in your head keep yelling at each other, and you can't hear yourself think? Yeah, that's funny, man.
Fleek, fleek, fleek, fleek.
Ha! Best booty contest! Buck, Buck, Buck, Buck, Buck, Buck He doesn't even have a booty.
I'd be more upset if I wasn't so zonked.
Gonna lay on this rock for a second and party on the down low.
Hey, blue-eyes, switch spots with her.
You like nature, eye broccoli? Then how's about takin' a hike? Much better.
Why, hello, there.
Buck, give us another laugh.
A crocodile, a rat, and an aye-aye walked into a club.
I know 'cause I was holding the club.
Kapow! - Ooh! - Hmm? Hi, Mother.
Forgot my toothbrush.
I got this, Mommy.
You made your bed, loser.
And I'm laying in it.
Todd! Shushies, shushies, Mama.
I'm your Todd now.
I'm all the Todd you'll ever need.
Tammy pay for this.
I can't believe what I'm about to say, but I need a break from all this partying.
I don't know how Buck does it.
That guy is crazy.
Your Highness, I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but Buck has surpassed your fleeks on Facewall.
No! Buck, Buck, Buck, Buck, Buck! After all of that? You have got to be kidding me.
I do not kid, Your Highness.
A puppet! I have sacrificed.
And for what? I let Willie into my entourage.
What the heck, man? And I miss my real friends, the ones that were less popular, but not annoying.
Most of the time.
Might I suggest you take some time to rest? Go off the radar for a couple of weeks.
And then when you're feeling refreshed, we can do a big re-launch.
Hmm.
A re-launch.
Oh, like a KJ missile.
Buck is merely the new guy, and if you leave for a bit, when you return, your fleeks will be as high as the sky.
Sky-high.
Like a sky god.
And in the meantime, I will keep your crown safe so that no one will be able to recognize you.
Lou, I don't know what I'd do without ya.
If you need anything, I'll be at Xixi's timeshare.
There has got to be something I have missed.
There is no way I'm crazy.
Am I crazy? I'm not crazy.
I'm a little bit crazy.
No, I'm not.
Yes, I am.
You're crazy! I'm crazy.
No, you are! Yeah, yeah, I'll just roll over there.
See where she lives, check it all out.
Make sure everything's on the up-and-up.
You know, I'm not gonna break in or anything, no.
That is a lot of makeup.
Talk about layering it on thick.
Whoa! Data! Let's see what Eloise has been up to.
Well, I'll be a hairless parson's monkey.
I've got to tell the others.
Clover.
Does King Julien need me? Do I have to go back to work? Maurice, Eloise is a fraud.
I knew something about her was off.
We have to go and find King Julien.
Don't ask.
Xixi, I said, "No, thank you.
" Hmm.
This is awkward.
Uh, it's Clo-Clo! And Mo-Mo! Clo-Clo! Mo-Mo! Mo-Mo! Clo-Clo! Guys, ah, I missed you.
And we missed you, Your Majesty.
Wait, where's your crown? Weezy is keeping it safe for me while I get some R&R before the big re-launch.
King Julien, Eloise's focus testing is completely fraudulent! Ooh! Fraudulent-le.
Even the allegations against her are fancy.
Did you ever actually look at the data? Well, I'm not really a numbers guy.
You're not gonna need numbers for this, Your Majesty.
Oh This is Eloise's so-called "focus testing," Your Majesty.
Raise your hand if you dislike schoolwork and think King Julien's entourage needs a younger member.
- Mama.
- Yes, yes, yes, yes, and yes.
Take a lolly if you think Clover is unlikable and Maurice is not funny.
Don't you children think Buck should have a wife? Unanimously yes.
Every major decision was based on this type of data? Not cool! Buck, the people have spoken.
They want you to be king.
My first order as king, shut up the people.
Bang.
Zip.
Pow.
Kaplooie.
This is a major opportunity for you, Buck.
The first puppet king.
That is major.
Silence, Pancho.
I'm talking to Buck.
Uh, king, eh? Just try this on for size.
Oh! You will make a great king.
It's just a shame I won't be around to see it.
Unless we could come to some sort of arrangement.
Perhaps ruling the kingdom could be left to me and the partying left to you.
Hey! Now we're talkin', I tell ya that.
OMSG! I leave for, like, five minutes, and Buck's got my crown and is marrying Eloise? That dude is on fire.
Your Majesty, this wedding is happening at the waterfall right now! And we are so gonna stop it.
Hoo-ah.
Pancho! Ay-yi-yi.
Perimeter secured.
Aww.
Todd.
Shushies, Mama.
Mm huh? Flower girl, go.
Ooh! Give me back my crown, puppet.
Baked Alaska, coming in hot.
So sorry I'm late.
I wanted to make sure the meringue was the perfect golden brow Oh! Oh, my! I killed the groom.
Thought you could take my place? Well, I'm gonna take your face.
Come at me, bro.
Tammy.
You are home wrecker.
Oh, them's fightin' words.
Todd! Mort! We're all gonna die! Clover, go.
It's only a little charred.
Pam? I beat up Pam! Ha! Technically you beat up Eloise.
You can have your kingdom back, Julien.
I don't even want it anymore.
They were, after all, willing to let a puppet be their king.
Manned by Pancho.
He was a really cool puppet.
RIP, fallen homey.
Weddings, am I right? Hmm? Hey, guys.
I don't post this stuff very often, but I just want to say that trying to be something you're not isn't cool.
You know what's cool? Being yourself.
Fleek if you agree.
Bunch of dingdongs.
So you're a felon, eh? With a capital P-H.
Hoo-ah! Straight outta Madagascar