'Allo 'Allo! (1982) s08e03 Episode Script

( theme music playing )
( coughing )
( mumbling )
YOU'LL FIND ME BEING
EXAMINED BY OUR LOCAL
G.P., DR. LECONTE,
BECAUSE MY NERVES ARE
ALL SHOT TO PIECES
FOLLOWING THE RECENT
COCK-UP IN OUR FIGHT
AGAINST THE GERMANS.
WHOO, THAT IS COLD!
I CAN SPEAK IN FRONT
OF DR. LECONTE
BECAUSE HE IS A LONG-SERVING
MEMBER OF THE RESISTANCE--
( coughing )
BUT FOR HOW MUCH LONGER,
I DO NOT KNOW.
YES, NEEDLESS TO SAY,
THE MOST RECENT PLAN
TO SET UP A SECRET
MOBILE RESISTANCE
RADIO STATION
IN A COFFIN
ON THE BACK OF MONSIEUR
ALFONSE'S HEARSE WENT WRONG.
THE HORSE BOLTED
AND THE RADIO STATION
WAS LAST SEEN DISAPPEARING
DUE SOUTH
AT A HUGE CANTER.
SO THIS COULD
BE MY LAST BIRTHDAY.
YOU HAVE THE LUNGS
OF A MAN OF 30,
BUT THE BODY,
- IT IS KNACKERED.
- ( sighs )
SURELY YOU CAN
DO SOMETHING.
YOU ARE VERY RUNDOWN.
BUT I WILL GIVE YOU THESE
PILLS TO PEP YOU UP.
( coughing )
YOU KEEP THEM, DOCTOR.
YOU NEED THEM MORE THAN I DO.
OH, RENE,
IT IS NOT BAD NEWS,
IS IT?
NO, THE DOCTOR SAID
I AM JUST RUNDOWN.
YOU SHOULD TRY
TO RELAX A BIT MORE.
RELAX? HOW CAN I RELAX
WHEN A MESSAGE TO ME
FROM GENERAL DE GAULLE
HAS BEEN TRANSMITTED
THROUGHOUT
ALL OF THE DISTRICT
FROM AN HEARSE?
- I AM A NERVOUS WRECK.
- OH, DO NOT WORRY, RENE.
MICHELLE OF THE RESISTANCE
WILL FIND THE HEARSE.
MONSIEUR ALFONSE
NEEDS IT TODAY.
AND I WILL BE NEEDING IT
TOMORROW IF THE GERMANS
HAVE HEARD THAT BROADCAST.
AND I NEED TO GET BACK
TO MY PRACTICE.
OH, DR. LECONTE,
WHILE YOU ARE HERE,
COULD YOU GIVE MAMA
A QUICK CHECKUP?
- I WILL SHOW YOU UPSTAIRS.
- OF COURSE.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY, RENE.
Rene: OH, MIMI.
I HAVE BROUGHT YOU
A PRESENT.
THANK YOU, MIMI.
I WONDER WHAT IT IS.
OH
IT IS A HOT-WATER
BOTTLE.
( chuckles )
OH, LOOK AT THIS.
I KNITTED
THE COVER MYSELF.
THINK OF ME EVERY TIME
YOU FILL IT UP
AND SCREW
IN THE STOPPER.
I PROMISE.
OH, RENE!
- I HAVE FOUND YOU
ALONE AT LAST.
- YES.
HOLD ME.
WHAT IS IT THAT
I FEEL BETWEEN US?
IT IS MY BIRTHDAY
PRESENT TO YOU.
IT IS TO HELP YOU FIND
YOUR WAY TO THE BROOM
CUPBOARD
IN THE MIDDLE
OF THE NIGHT.
AS SOON AS YOU
START FLASHING,
I WILL FIND YOU.
YOU THINK OF EVERYTHING.
- OH, RENE
- YES.
I MUST TALK TO YOU.
IT IS ABOUT OUR BABY.
I DO NOT WANT IT
TO BE BORN FATHERLESS.
WHEN ARE WE
GOING TO BE MARRIED?
KEEP YOUR VOICE DOWN.
WE CANNOT HURRY THESE
THINGS, YVETTE.
WE COULD BE MARRIED
IN SECRET.
OH, LET US GO
TO THE PRIEST LATER
AND ASK HIM.
NO, I WILL TAKE A LOT
OF PERSUADING TO GO
TO SEE A PRIEST.
RENE, IF YOU DO
NOT COME I WILL TELL
THE WHOLE VILLAGE
YOU ARE THE FATHER
OF MY CHILD.
- I AM PERSUADED.
- OH, RENE,
I KNEW YOU WOULD.
RENE!
WHAT ARE YOU DOING
WITH THAT SERVANT GIRL
IN YOUR ARMS?
YOU STUPID WOMAN,
CAN YOU NOT SEE
THIS POOR CHILD
IS UNWELL
BECAUSE OF HER PREGNANCY
AND THE IMPOSSIBLE STRAIN
OF NOT KNOWING
- WHO THE FATHER IS?
- ( crying )
YES YES, YOU GO
AND LIE DOWN, YVETTE.
WE WILL ASK DR. LECONTE
TO GIVE YOU SOMETHING
WHEN HE COMES DOWN.
OH, THANK YOU, RENE.
OH, I AM SORRY, RENE.
I DID NOT REALIZE
YVETTE WAS ILL.
WE ARE ALL A BIT
UNDER THE WEATHER
AT THE MOMENT.
WELL, NEVER MIND, RENE.
YOU WILL PERK UP LATER.
I HAVE A SPECIAL
BIRTHDAY SURPRISE
FOR YOU.
YOU ARE NOT PREGNANT
AS WELL, ARE YOU?
NO, BUT I HAVE SOMETHING
WHICH WILL TAKE YOU BACK
TO YOUR YOUTH.
YOU HAVE NOT BOUGHT ME
A TOUPEE, I HOPE.
NO, BUT I HAVE SOMETHING
THAT WILL HELP US
RECAPTURE THE JOYS
OF OUR COURTING DAYS.
OH, IT IS HARD
TO REMEMBER
THAT ONCE YOU WERE
A STRAPPING LAD OF 20
AND I WAS A GIRLISH
SWEET 16 IN FULL BLOOM.
AND NOW WE ARE
BOTH OVERGROWN
WITH THE WEEDS OF TIME.
HOLD ME.
KISS ME
LIKE YOU USED TO.
LET US TURN BACK
THE CLOCK.
I WILL HAVE TO DO A LOT
OF WINDING UP FIRST.
- RENE! RENE!
- YES.
FOR ONCE, YOU WILL
BE GLAD TO SEE ME.
YOU DO NOT KNOW
HOW RIGHT YOU ARE,
MICHELLE.
WE HAVE FOUND MONSIEUR
ALFONSE'S HEARSE
AND THE RADIO
TRANSMITTER IN THE COFFIN.
EVERYTHING IS ALL RIGHT.
BUT IT HAS BEEN BROADCASTING
A MESSAGE TO ME
FROM GENERAL DE GAULLE.
IF THE GERMANS HEAR THAT,
I WILL BE SHOT.
THEY HEARD NOTHING.
MY GIRLS HAVE BEEN
MONITORING THE AIRWAVES.
WE WILL HAVE TO MAKE
A MORE POWERFUL BATTERY.
THE ONE IN THE COFFIN
WAS TOO WEAK TO TRANSMIT
THE RECORDING.
OH, THANK GOD FOR THAT.
OH, RENE,
YOU ARE IN THE CLEAR.
I THINK PERHAPS YOU
SPOKE TOO SOON, EDITH.
GOOD MOANING.
WHAT SHALL WE DE
WITH THE KIFFIN?
YOU CANNOT BRING
THAT IN HERE.
RENE, WE HAVE TO HIDE
THE RADIO TRANSMITTER.
WE THOUGHT WE COULD PUT IT
IN YOUR CELLAR.
NO, IT'S OUT
OF THE QUESTION.
THE GERMANS SOMETIMES
GO IN MY CELLAR
LOOKING FOR WINE.
WELL, WHAT ABOUT THE ATTIC?
THEY DO NOT GO THERE.
OH, VERY WELL.
BUT GET IT UP
THERE QUICKLY.
I CANNOT HAVE
A COFFIN IN MY CAFE.
PEOPLE WILL THINK
THE FOOD HAS GONE OFF.
A FINE BIRTHDAY THIS
IS TURNING OUT TO BE.
- OH, RENE, IS IT
YOUR BIRTHDAY?
- YEAH.
HOW OLD ARE YOU?
I LOSE TRACK.
EVERY TIME YOU
COME AROUND
I AGE 10 YEARS.
IS THERE ANYTHING
THE MATTER WITH ME?
OH, YOU ARE DOING
REMARKABLY WELL
FOR A LADY OF 94,
MADAME FANNY.
I AM ONLY 87.
YOU ARE STILL
DOING WELL.
LET US HOPE
YOU CAN KEEP IT UP.
DID SOMEONE CALL?
GO BACK TO SLEEP,
ERNEST.
( coughs )
WELL,
WHATEVER THE RESULTS,
I DO WISH TO KNOW
AS SOON AS POSSIBLE.
NATURALLY.
BYE.
( coughing )
( screams )
I DEMAND A SECOND OPINION.
GET OUT, GET OUT!
SHUT UP, YOU OLD BAT.
WHAT IS THE MATTER,
FANNY?
OH, LOOK,
THEY ARE GOING TO
PUT ME IN A BOX.
SAY SOMETHING, ERNEST.
WHAT SORT OF FLOWERS
WOULD YOU LIKE?
MAMA, CALM YOURSELF.
THE COFFIN IS NOT
FOR YOU.
NOT YET ANYWAY.
WE WILL COME BACK
AND RETRIEVE IT
WHEN WE HAVE MADE A MORE
POWERFUL BATTERY.
THE SECRET RADIO STATION
WILL BE BACK ON THE AIR
WITHIN A VERY
SHORT TIME WITH LUCK
AND GOOD MANAGEMENT.
BUT MOSTLY LUCK.
MONSIEUR ALFONSE,
HAVE YOU GOT RENE'S
BIRTHDAY PRESENT YET?
OH, I WILL DELIVER
IT THIS AFTERNOON,
MADAME EDITH.
- YOU STILL WANT IT?
- OH, YES.
WE HAVE ALWAYS
WANTED A CAR.
MAMA SAID SHE WOULD USE
HER SAVINGS TO GET US
ONE YEARS AGO,
BUT HAS ONLY NOW
GOT AROUND TO IT.
SHE THINKS IT IS
JUST FOR ME,
BUT RENE WILL BE
SO THRILLED.
WHAT IS GOING ON?
MONSIEUR ALFONSE AND I
WERE PREPARING A SURPRISE
FOR RENE.
OH, RENE, SPLENDID.
AND MAKE SURE
YOU BURY HIM
GOOD AND DEEP.
- HEIL HITLER.
- HEIL HITLER.
COLONEL, THERE'S BEEN
A MAJOR LAPSE OF SECURITY.
THE GARRISON PAY TRUCK
HAS BEEN ROBBED BY NONE
OTHER THAN THE GESTAPO.
NO!
CAN WE TRUST NO ONE?
FORTUNATELY, I APPREHENDED
THE MISCREANTS AT THE SCENE
OF THE CRIME.
THEY ARE CURRENTLY
IN THE CHATEAU DUNGEONS.
WILL THEY BE PUT
ON TRIAL?
NO, THEY WILL BE SHOT.
I WANT SECURITY MEASURES
TIGHTENED THROUGHOUT
THE DISTRICT.
IT'S PARTICULARLY
IMPORTANT TODAY,
AS THE FUHRER
AND FIELD MARSHAL GOERING
ARE VISITING
OUR COASTAL DEFENSES
TO BOOST THE MORALE
OF THE TROOPS.
THEY WILL BE
ARRIVING HERE SHORTLY.
THE FUHRER
AND FIELD MARSHAL GOERING
ARRIVING HERE SHORTLY.
IS THERE AN ECHO
IN THIS ROOM?
ACTUALLY,
BETWEEN OURSELVES,
IT'S NOT REALLY
HITLER AND GOERING.
THEY ARE DOUBLES,
BUT THEY JUST LOOK
LIKE THEM.
THE REAL HITLER
AND GOERING WOULD
NOT DARE TO COME HERE.
IN CASE THEY WERE ASSASSINATED
BY THE RESISTANCE?
IN CASE THEY
WERE ASSASSINATED
BY THE GERMANS.
I'M ENTERTAINING THEM
TO LUNCH IN MY QUARTERS.
YOU AND GRUBER
ARE INVITED, COLONEL.
1:00 ON THE DOT.
( clicks heels )
YOUR LAST REQUEST
IS HERE.
DID I MAKE
A LAST REQUEST?
IT IS I, HELGA.
WHAT ARE YOU
DOING HERE?
TO GAIN ENTRY I SAID
YOU ASKED FOR A WOMAN
OF EASY VIRTUE
TO SHARE
YOUR LAST HOURS.
DID I ASK FOR A WOMAN
OF EASY VIRTUE TOO?
- SILENCE, VON SMALLHAUSEN.
- PERHAPS I COULD SHARE HELGA.
TAKE YOUR BALL AND STAND
IN YOUR CORNER.
I HAD TO SEE YOU
ONE LAST TIME,
HERR FLICK.
TO HAVE A FINAL KISS
BEFORE YOU ARE SHOT.
I AM THE GODSON
OF HEINRICH HIMMLER.
THEY CANNOT SHOOT ME.
- ( gunfire )
- WHAT WAS THAT?
THE FIRING SQUAD ARE
DOING TARGET PRACTICE,
HERR FLICK.
HELGA, I KNOW ALL
ABOUT THE ROBBERY
OF THE GARRISON PAY TRUCK.
IF YOU DO NOT GET US OUT
OF HERE, I WILL TELL
THE GENERAL
THAT IT WAS THE COLONEL
AND LIEUTENANT GRUBER
WHO REALLY STOLE
THE MONEY.
- AND YOU WILL BE
IMPLICATED TOO.
- YOU WOULDN'T.
HE WOULD.
VERY WELL,
YOU LEAVE ME NO CHOICE.
BUT MAY
I KISS YOU ANYWAY?
OF COURSE.
AVERT YOUR EYES,
VON SMALLHAUSEN.
YOUR KISS GIVES ME
STRENGTH, HERR FLICK.
I WILL SPEAK TO
THE COLONEL ABOUT BREAKING
YOU OUT OF HERE.
- GOOD.
- ( gunfire )
MAKE IT QUICK, HELGA.
THE FIRING SQUAD ARE
GETTING BETTER.
THEY HIT THE WALL
THAT TIME.
OH, RENE, I THOUGHT
YOU WERE NOT COMING.
I CANNOT STAY LONG,
YVETTE.
LET US GET THIS
OVER WITH.
QUICKLY BEFORE
ANYONE SEES US.
WHAT CAN I DO FOR YOU?
FATHER, WE HAVE COME
TO CONFESS THAT WE
WISH TO BE MARRIED.
BUT THAT IS NOT
A SIN, MY CHILD.
YOU HAVE NOT HEARD
THE REST OF IT.
Priest:
THERE IS MORE?
I AM WITH CHILD.
OH YES, THAT DOES
MAKE A DIFFERENCE.
IT WILL NOT PREVENT
US MARRYING, WILL IT?
I SHOULD THINK
IT MAKES IT IMPERATIVE.
DID YOU LEAD THIS
MAN ON IN ANY WAY?
PERHAPS A LITTLE BIT.
A LITTLE BIT?
YOU WERE VERY ENCOURAGING.
BUT YOU SHOULD NOT
HAVE SUCCUMBED, MY SON.
YOU SHOULD HAVE TOLD
THE DEMON LUST TO GET
BEHIND YOU.
THERE WAS NO ROOM.
WE WERE
IN THE BROOM CUPBOARD.
WHAT IS YOUR NAME,
CHILD?
Yvette: I CANNOT SAY.
WE WISH THIS TO BE
A SECRET MARRIAGE.
- AND YOU, MY SON?
- I WISH TO REMAIN
ANONYMOUS TOO.
I AM OFFICIALLY DEAD.
IT WILL BE VERY DIFFICULT
MARRYING AN UNKNOWN WOMAN
TO A MAN
WHO IS OFFICIALLY DEAD.
COULD YOU NOT PUT
ME DOWN AS MISS X
AND HIM AS MR. X?
AND WE WILL KEEP
THE NAME OF THE CHILD
ALSO A SECRET.
WHY?
I AM NOT GOING TO CALL
MY CHILD "WHY."
NO NO, I MEAN
WHY SHOULD THERE BE
ALL THIS MYSTERY?
IT HAS TO BE
A SECRET, FATHER.
YOU SEE, WE ARE BOTH
HEAVILY INVOLVED
IN THE RESISTANCE.
AH, THE RESISTANCE.
THAT IS A DIFFERENT MATTER.
I MAY BE ABLE
TO HELP YOU.
ARE YOU SURE
YOU TRULY LOVE EACH OTHER?
OH YES, FATHER.
HAVE YOU KNOWN OTHER MEN?
FOUR OR FIVE.
- IN YOUR LIFE?
- NO, A WEEK.
BUT I DO IT TO SUPPORT
MY POOR MOTHER.
VERY WELL. I WILL TRY
TO ARRANGE A SECRET MARRIAGE.
BUT IT IS VERY UNUSUAL,
SO I MUST CONSULT WITH
THE BISHOP FIRST.
- OH, THANK YOU, FATHER.
- COME BACK AND SEE ME
IN A WEEK.
IN THE MEANTIME,
YOU MUST BOTH SAY
50 HAIL MARYS
AS A PENANCE
FOR YOUR SINS.
- YES, FATHER.
- COME ON.
OH, RENE,
ONLY 50 HAIL MARYS
AND SOON WE ARE
GOING TO BE MARRIED.
DO YOU NOT THINK
WE GOT OFF LIGHTLY?
I THINK THAT DEPENDS
ON HOW YOU LOOK
AT IT, YVETTE.
GOOD MOANING.
NOT YOU AGAIN.
WHAT DO YOU WANT NOW?
I HAVE A MASSAGE
FROM MICHELLE.
LUSTEN VERY CAREFULLY.
I SHALL SOO THIS
ONLY WENCE.
MICHELLE HAS DISCOVERED
THAT HOTLER AND GEERING
ARE COMING THIS AFTERNOON
TO THE CHITEAU.
WHAT IS THIS LUNATIC
ON ABOUT?
HE SAYS HITLER AND GOERING
ARE COMING TO THE CHATEAU.
- NO!
- YES.
MICHELLE HAS A PLIN
TO ASSAUSINATE THEM.
I HAVE A CLOCKWORK BUM
IN MY TROUSERS.
YOUR PERSONAL PROBLEMS
ARE NO CONCERN OF OURS.
HE MEANS
A CLOCKWORK BOMB.
WHAT?
( whimpers )
DO NOT WEARY.
IT IS QUITE SOFE.
WE WILL ATTICH IT
TO HOTLER'S CAR
AND BLEE HIM
TO SMOTHEROONS.
GET THAT THING OUT OF HERE.
ARE YOU MAD?
WE ARE LICKING
FOR VILUNTOURS.
HINDS UP IF YOU WANT
TO HAVE A GOO.
WE DO NOT WANT
TO HAVE A GOO.
IT IS A SUICIDAL PLAN,
OFFICER CRABTREE.
YOU WILL NEVER FIND
ANYONE STUPID ENOUGH
TO CARRY IT OUT.
I WILL DO IT.
THERE IS ALWAYS ONE.
I WILL SACRIFICE MYSELF
TO STRIKE A DARING BLOW
FOR THE RESISTANCE.
I AM A TRUE DAUGHTER
OF FRANCE--
BRAVE AS A LIONESS,
BOLD AS A WOLF.
DAFT AS A BRUSH.
NOW YOU KNOW WHAT
TO DO, HELGA?
YES, COLONEL.
I GO TO THE CHATEAU
DUNGEONS ON THE PRETEXT
OF HEARING HERR FLICK'S
CONFESSION AND GIVING
HIM THIS FOOD.
I THEN GIVE HIM
THIS STICK OF DYNAMITE,
DISGUISED
AS A KNOCKWURST SAUSAGE
TO ENABLE HIM TO BLOW
THE BARS OFF HIS CELL
AND ESCAPE.
I MUST SAY
IT PAINS ME DEEPLY
TO HELP THAT MAN
IN THIS WAY.
NOW WE MUST GO.
THE FUHRER IS EXPECTING
US TO LUNCH.
MY LITTLE TANK
IS OUTSIDE.
ANY CHANCE
OF A LIFT?
I'M AFRAID NOT, HELGA.
IT IS AGAINST
REGULATIONS
TO GIVE LIFTS
TO HITCHHIKING NUNS.
MALE CHAUVINIST PIG.
OOPS.
I'M SORRY
WE'RE LATE, GENERAL.
THE SECURITY AROUND
THE CHATEAU IS UNBELIEVABLE.
'TIS NECESSARY
TO PROTECT OUR VISITORS.
EVEN THOUGH THEY ARE
ONLY DOUBLES,
EVERYONE MUST BELIEVE
THEY'RE THE REAL THING.
WHO EXACTLY ARE THEY,
GENERAL?
OH
HITLER IS A CORPORAL
IN THE CATERING CORPS.
GOERING IS A CLERK
IN THE MINISTRY OF DEFENSE.
THEY ARE HAVING A WASH
AFTER THEIR JOURNEY.
THE FUHRER
AND FIELD MARSHAL GOERING.
HEIL HITLER.
All: HEIL HITLER.
THESE ARE MY TWO SENIOR
OFFICERS-- COLONEL VON STROHM
- AND LIEUTENANT GRUBER.
- MEIN FUHRER.
- PARDON.
- YOU WILL ADDRESS ME
AT ALL TIMES AS MEIN FUHRER.
- AND DO NOT FORGET IT.
- BUT SURELY--
WE WILL ASK THE QUESTIONS.
WE ARE EMPOWERED
BY THE FUHRER HIMSELF
TO GIVE ORDERS
TO OFFICERS OF ANY RANK.
OTHERWISE, WE WOULD NOT
BE BELIEVABLE AS DOUBLES.
I'M SORRY, MEIN FUHRER.
ALREADY, I AM FAR
FROM IMPRESSED WITH
YOUR GARRISON, GENERAL.
THESE TWO OFFICERS
LOOK DISTINCTLY
SLOPPY TO ME.
AND YOU ARE NOT
MUCH BETTER!
YOU HAD ALL BETTER
PULL YOURSELVES TOGETHER
OR BERLIN WILL HEAR
ABOUT IT!
- YES, MEIN FUHRER.
- YES, MEIN FUHRER.
CHAMPAGNE, HERMANN?
LEAD ME TO IT, ADOLF.
WHO DOES THAT JUMPED-UP
LITTLE CORPORAL THINK
HE IS? HITLER?
GOOD DAY, SISTER.
I HAVE BROUGHT SOME FOOD
FOR THE TWO CONDEMNED
PRISONERS
IN THE DUNGEONS.
I WILL HAVE TO
SEARCH YOUR BASKET.
- MARIA.
- NOT NOW, HANSEL.
I CAN'T STAY.
COOK WILL KILL ME
IF I DON'T GET
THESE PROVISIONS
TO THE KITCHEN.
OH, JUST A QUICK KISS.
LATER.
I'M OFF AT 6:00.
I'LL MEET YOU
IN THE SQUARE.
- YOU PROMISE?
- ( kisses )
ALL THAT SEEMS
TO BE IN ORDER, SISTER.
DO YOU KNOW YOUR WAY
TO THE DUNGEONS?
I HAVE VISITED PRISONERS
HERE BEFORE.
DOWN THE STEPS,
TURN LEFT AT THE BOTTOM
AND JUST FOLLOW THE RATS.
I THOUGHT WE WOULD INSPECT
THE TROOPS AT 3:00,
MEIN FUHRER.
WE WILL INSPECT THEM
WHEN WE ARE READY,
AND NOT BEFORE.
OF COURSE,
MEIN FUHRER.
I WANT LUNCH FIRST.
HAVE SOME FOOD SENT UP.
IMMEDIATELY, GENERAL.
GRUBER, PHONE THE KITCHENS
FOR SOME FOOD
FOR MEIN FIELD MARSHAL.
THIS IS THE GENERAL'S
QUARTERS.
COULD YOU SEND UP LUNCH
FOR FIVE AT ONCE?
YES, IS THERE ANYTHING
YOU PARTICULARLY FANCY,
MEIN FUHRER?
YES, KNOCKWURST SAUSAGES.
- AND PLENTY OF THEM.
- GOOD IDEA, ADOLF.
I FANCY A GOOD BLOWOUT.
I WILL GIVE THE PRISONERS
THIS FOOD AND THEN TAKE
THEIR CONFESSIONS.
THE LAST WOMAN WAS
A WOMAN OF EASY VIRTUE.
THEY PROBABLY HAVE
A LOT TO CONFESS.
I'VE COME TO GET YOU OUT,
HERR FLICK.
THIS KNOCKWURST SAUSAGE
IS REALLY A STICK
OF DYNAMITE.
TIE IT TO THE BARS,
LIGHT THE STRING
AT ONE END
AND IT WILL
BLOW OUT THE WALL.
YOU HAVE DONE WELL, HELGA.
I WILL REWARD YOU FOR THIS.
WILL YOU ALLOW ME
TO KISS YOU AGAIN,
HERR FLICK?
I DO NOT HAVE TIME.
I DO.
SILENCE,
VON SMALLHAUSEN.
BUT WHEN WE HAVE ESCAPED,
HELGA, COME TO MY DUNGEON
- AND WE WILL SEE.
- YES, HERR FLICK.
ONLY DO NOT COME DRESSED
AS A NUN.
I MUCH PREFER YOU AS
A WOMAN OF EASY VIRTUE.
THAT'S WHAT THEY
ALL SAY, HERR FLICK.
HERE ARE SOME MATCHES
FOR THE DYNAMITE.
- ROPE.
- YOU ARE FULL OF SURPRISES.
THIS ONE SURPRISED ME
THE MOST.
WE WILL LEAVE YOU ALONE
FOR A TIME NOW.
WE MUST GO AND ORGANIZE
THE MARCH PAST OF TROOPS,
MEIN FUHRER.
I FANCY A LITTLE PIECE
OF CHEESE.
GENERAL,
OUR SPARE UNIFORMS
ARE IN THAT CASE.
SEE THEY ARE PRESSED
BEFORE WE LEAVE.
YES, MEIN FUHRER.
HEIL HITLER.
HEIL HITLER.
DISMISSED.
THE NERVE OF THE MAN.
- I CAN'T WAIT TO SEE
THE BACK OF THOSE TWO.
- ( explosion )
I THINK YOUR WISH
HAS COME TRUE, GENERAL.
OH MY GOD.
IT MUST BE THE RESISTANCE.
NO ONE MUST KNOW
ABOUT THIS.
WELL, IT WILL NOT BE EASY
TO KEEP SECRET, GENERAL.
BUT IF THE REAL FUHRER
FINDS OUT
HE WILL THINK WE WERE
INVOLVED IN SOME PLOT
TO BLOW HIM UP.
BUT WHAT CAN WE DO,
GENERAL?
YOU'VE GOT TWO BODIES
IN YOUR QUARTERS.
WE WILL DISPOSE
OF THEM LATER.
MORE IMPORTANTLY FOR NOW,
HITLER AND GOERING
MUST BE SEEN
TO LEAVE THE CHATEAU
AND THE TOWN.
WE MUST NOT BE IMPLICATED
IN THESE DEATHS.
BUT HOW CAN THEY BE
SEEN TO LEAVE THE TOWN
IF THEY ARE DEAD?
THERE IS ONLY ONE SOLUTION.
I THINK THE UNIFORMS WILL FIT.
MIMI, DID YOU MANAGE
TO PUT THE BOMB
UNDER HITLER'S CAR?
THE CHATEAU WAS
TOO HEAVILY GUARDED.
I COULD NOT GET NEAR IT.
DAMN, WHERE IS
THE BOMB NOW?
IT IS STRAPPED
TO MY LEG.
- BE CAREFUL, MIMI.
- I AM WALKING
VERY GINGERLY.
( car horn honks )
IT IS THEM--
HITLER AND GOERING.
- THEY HAVE COME
TO INSPECT THEIR TROOPS.
- LET ME SEE.
THERE ARE TOO MANY SOLDIERS.
LET US GO OUTSIDE
AND WATCH.
BACK INSIDE, PEASANT.
NO ONE'S ALLOWED
IN THE SQUARE.
NOW IS YOUR CHANCE,
MIMI.
I WILL GO DOWN
THE DRAIN IN
THE BACK GARDEN,
CRAWL ALONG THE SEWER,
COME UP UNDERNEATH
HITLER'S CAR
AND PLANT THE BOMB.
YOU ARE A TRUE HEROINE
OF THE RESISTANCE, MIMI.
GOOD LUCK.
HOW BRAVE MIMI IS.
SHE WILL HAVE TO MOVE
FASTER THAN THAT
OR THEY WILL HAVE
GONE BY THE TIME
SHE GETS THERE.
WE WILL TAKE
THE SALUTE NOW.
( marching )
IF ONLY I HAD A RIFLE,
I COULD END THE WAR
HERE AND NOW.
DO NOT HAVE ANY IDEAS,
MICHELLE.
- IT IS ALL UP
TO MIMI NOW.
- YEAH.
OH LOOK, THERE'S RENE
LOOKING OUT OF THE WINDOW.
I'LL GIVE HIM
A LITTLE TREAT.
MY GOD,
DID YOU SEE THAT?
HITLER JUST GAVE ME
A LITTLE WAVE.
THAT IS ALL I NEED,
TO BE FANCIED
BY HITLER.
DRIVE ON!
I THOUGHT A BOMB
WAS SUPPOSED TO BLOW HIM UP.
MIMI MIGHT STILL
HAVE GOT THROUGH.
THE BOMB IS ON A TIMER.
- YVETTE, GO AND SEE
IF YOU CAN FIND HER.
- ALL RIGHT.
OH, MONSIEUR ALFONSE.
WHAT WERE YOU DOING
IN OUR BACK PASSAGE?
I HAD TO RUN THROUGH
THE BACK STREETS
TO GET HERE.
I HAVE THE CAR, MADAME.
AND HERE ARE THE KEYS.
OH, THANK YOU,
MONSIEUR ALFONSE.
I DO IT OUT OF LOVE
FOR YOU.
I'LL HAVE THE MONEY NOW.
WHERE IS THE CAR?
I'VE LEFT IT IN THE SQUARE
BEFORE THE SOLDIERS THERE
CORDONED IT OFF.
OH, RENE,
- MAMA AND I BOUGHT A SPECIAL
SURPRISE FOR YOU.
- HUH?
WE HAVE BOUGHT
MONSIEUR ALFONSE'S CAR
FOR YOUR BIRTHDAY.
A CAR!
OH, EDITH!
I DO NOT KNOW
WHAT TO SAY!
IT WILL HELP US REMEMBER
OUR COURTING DAYS.
WE COULD GO FOR A SPIN
IN THE COUNTRY LIKE
WE USED TO.
WE ONLY HAD A HORSE
AND CART THEN.
THIS WILL BE MUCH BETTER.
COME OUTSIDE AND SEE.
- OH-OH!
- CLOSE YOUR EYES.
NOW OPEN YOUR EYES.
IS IT NOT
A MAGNIFICENT MOTOR?
FOR ME? OH, EDITH.
I SHALL CALL
FOR THE CASH LATER.
- MADAME.
- YOU CAN DRIVE.
EDITH.
MIMI, ARE YOU ALL RIGHT?
WHAT HAPPENED?
I DID IT.
I PLANTED THE BOMB.
THE CAR WAS DIRECTLY
OVER THE DRAIN.
WELL DONE.
LET US HAVE A DRINK
TO CELEBRATE.
WHERE SHALL WE GO?
DOWN BY THE RIVER.
DO YOU REMEMBER THAT
TIME WE WENT THERE
AND LAY ON THE GRASS
UNDER THE WILLOW TREE?
OH, LET US TRY
AND RECAPTURE THE MEMORY
OF WHAT HAPPENED THAT DAY.
( explosion )
( coughs )
HAVE YOU ANYTHING
TO SAY, EDITH?
HAPPY BIRTHDAY, RENE.
( theme music playing )