Alpha Males (2022) s02e05 Episode Script

Don't Go Falling in Love

[classical music playing]
[door opens]
- [door closes]
- Where the hell were you?
- I just got home.
- Obviously.
Hello, Stefan.
You couldn't send me a message?
Stefan and I were
so worried about you. Right, Stefan?
[clicks tongue]
Come on, spill it.
How'd it go with Ángela?
Because you slept together, right?
I was with Daniela.
So you ditched your boss?
This reconciliation thing is awesome.
Life is starting
to give back everything it took from me.
Oh. You're back together?
After what she did?
Pedro, deconstructing yourself
is one thing, but don't be an idiot.
You wanna get back with Luz.
She sold your restaurant for one euro.
It's in very bad taste to bring up
Luz when I'm talking about you two.
Raúl, you're ruining
the basic rule of friendship.
A friend never behaves
like a girlfriend, man.
That really hurt.
Comparing me to a girlfriend is
the worst thing you've ever done to me.
I'm gonna be late, so I'm gonna go shower.
Stefan, we've got a problem.
You'll be late
for school if you don't hurry.
I thought we were supposed to eat slow.
You have to sign my report card.
[Esther] You're just telling me now?
Well, it's so you don't have
the time to tell him off.
Let's see. [exhales]
This damn report card.
If you failed English again,
you're gonna get a tutor.
[Ulises] No, I scraped by in English.
[keys clacking]
"BDSM, big tits."
[exhales] What the hell?
Yeah, yeah. It's so bad.
Esther's been watching porn
on the computer at home.
[Pedro] And she doesn't erase the history?
What an idiot.
[Raúl] So, chicks watch porn?
I guess my wife does.
With big tits and BDSM.
I've stopped. Uh
The porn industry is extremely sexist.
Yeah, okay, but it's just that
Esther has masculine toxicity.
Why is Esther searching "big tits"?
[gasps] She lesbian?
So your marriage has been a lie, Luis.
Uh, no, no. I don't know.
I don't know. Maybe she needs some love.
I'm gonna plan something romantic.
Netflix and chill.
- Then you fuck her.
- That's it. So go for it.
Okay, sure. Jesus, the pressure.
[man on police radio]
We're heading back now. Over.
And we'll install special sinks
in the bathrooms
to help facilitate the washing
and the rinsing of, uh, menstrual cups.
Oh, and show her the female urinals.
Yes, here they are.
They're longer, okay?
And they have a raised back
to help preserve your privacy, of course.
You're the first architect
I've met that takes gender differences
into account in his projects.
He did a course
on demolishing his masculinity. Hmm?
Deconstructing, uh, yes.
I have my diploma. On my desk.
This kid is the office gem.
It cost us a ton to steal him
from Norman Foster. [chuckles]
Your project was a total hit.
Although she was trying
really hard not to show it. [laughs]
- I can't do coffee. It makes me jittery.
- [Román] Santiago, you're a pro.
But I'm not giving you a raise.
At least not yet.
But I want you to have dinner at my home.
Oh. Well, I'd be honored.
- [Román] Mm.
- [both chuckle]
[Paula] Congratulations,
Mr. Female-Friendly.
- Shh! Hey, stop, please.
- [laughs]
- What are you doing?
- The boss likes you.
And I do as well.
- You can't talk about that stuff here.
- Why? What's wrong?
I don't want people
to think I'm a womanizer.
Oh, right, right, right. Oh, of course.
- We can focus on work. Hmm?
- That's right.
We wouldn't want anyone to think
something's going on when it's not.
Uh, well, look, there is, you know,
uh, something, but not here, not now.
Mm. No, don't worry. We won't talk.
No, no, no, no, no. Hold on.
If we avoid each other,
people will get suspicious.
So what should we do?
- Jesus, it's not like I fucked you.
- Shh! Please, Paula!
We have to act normally, which is
exactly what you're not doing right now.
So, I'll see you tonight?
Uh, no, no, I can't.
I'm going to the movies with my daughter.
You're taking your 18-year-old
to the movies? She has no friends?
Well, we are really close, I mean Hey!
- Hey, so
- Excuse me.
Yeah, we were just talking
about structures and positions and so on.
- Hmm, that's good. Good.
- [Paula] Mm-hmm.
[Santi exhales]
- Whoa!
- [Santi] Shh!
A lot of people have been asking me
about this organic deodorant cream,
promoted by several influencers.
Let's see. Uh, "No chemical ingredients,
no aluminum, vegan, cruelty-free."
"Protection for 72 hours."
I've used it. I've used it.
I've only been using it 24 hours.
Patri, how do I smell after yoga?
[Patricia] A little stinky, ma'am!
To the people at DeoVegan,
do not say "protection for 72 hours."
First, because lying is wrong, you know?
And second, because people believe it
and go three days without a shower.
- "Regener"
- [cell phone ringing]
[line rings]
- [Daniela] Tax office, how can I help you?
- [chuckles] So, are we meeting later?
- Are you insane? Two days in a row?
- What does it matter if people find out?
I thought honesty
was your whole new thing.
Yes, but I gained a lot of new followers.
Now I'm an influ-hater.
You're a what?
Now brands pay me not to talk about them.
I've reinvented myself. I'm a pioneer.
Okay, that's amazing.
But what's gonna happen with us?
- Slow down, buddy. Don't smother me.
- [door opens]
- [Ángela] Can we talk?
- Ángela.
I'm so sorry about last night. Truly.
So, how's your vertigo?
Because what you said
yesterday sounded like an excuse.
No, I swear. It comes on all of a sudden,
and it incapacitates me,
makes me dizzy, and I have to rest.
Yeah, that is vertigo.
Look, I don't like it
when people cancel our meetings.
It's a pet peeve I have, okay?
But this time I'll let you off.
Because we sold the series!
- What? Are you serious?
- Yes! [laughs]
- We're gonna film Alpha Males! Yeah!
- Yes. Yes. Holy shit. I'm gonna hug you.
- Yes, yes! [laughs]
- Oh!
- [clears throat] This is great.
- [laughs]
- Yes.
- Congratulations.
Oh, thank you.
Let's go tell the scriptwriters.
[exhales] Oh, shit.
Is this a joke?
They seriously bought that?
Didn't you wanna destroy the patriarchy?
It's your series.
They're four idiots looking like assholes.
[chuckles] Well, not assholes.
What I don't really understand is
why the influencer, who is so successful,
is even with that idiot.
Pablo's not an idiot.
He's a multifaceted character.
He's complex.
Oh, come on.
What about that garbage
with the divorced guy and the ten bodies?
Isn't that objectification?
And the pathetic womanizer
who owns the restaurant?
She opens the relationship. He's thrilled.
Hey, no! I'm telling you,
it's not like that.
Okay, the important thing is
we've sold it.
- It's not that bad.
- Don't worry about them.
- We have to film the pilot.
- Okay.
Start typing today. Good luck, girls.
[footsteps fading]
- [exhales]
- [Olga] Are you together?
- [Pedro] What?
- Mm, nothing.
Just by the way she touched you.
She doesn't do that to you?
To be honest,
that would explain a lot of things.
Listen, I get that it's difficult
to have a sexist pig as a boss.
But if you think I'm here
for any other reason
than my abilities
and my talent, I'm offended.
Get to work!
I'm not just some piece of meat.
[quietly] Well.
Come and live in my house.
There's no pool, because it's urban.
You would be closer to the restaurant.
No, no, thank you.
But there's no need to move.
Look, Raúl, from what you've told me,
it reeks of reconciliation and a move.
Women are very territorial.
I have faith in Pedro.
He'll mess it up, for sure.
Do you have any plans tonight?
It's my fuck buddy's birthday,
and we're celebrating at my house.
Come and see it.
No, I don't think I can tonight,
because I'm having dinner with my parents.
They're getting old,
and my mom made some special beef.
- There'll be women there. Hmm.
- Yeah. Yeah, I'll come. Hmm. Mm-hmm.
Okay. Indicator on
and take the third exit.
- We're not following anyone?
- [Esther] No.
Today, we're going to
the supermarket parking lot.
- To practice parking the car?
- To buy some toilet paper.
- I only have two rolls.
- [ringtone plays]
- What's up?
- [Luis] Hi, my little slut.
Wanna go for a romantic dinner tonight?
Just the two of us.
Luis, I'm in the middle of teaching.
- Hi. [laughs]
- Why did you take my call?
And what do we do with the kids?
You know your mom won't do it.
I can do it. 20 euros an hour.
- Fifteen.
- Deal.
- Reserve it. Álex will do it. Watch out!
- [tires screech]
- [horns honk]
- She was about to cross.
Oh, wow. The mom's sporty.
Why are you here? You like kitesurfing?
- I like the mojitos from that beach bar.
- Mm.
You're here alone?
[Álvaro] From my dad, right?
Enjoy your mojito, Álvaro.
You want one?
Hey, hey, yo. Want a drink?
What's up? You get stood up by Daniela?
She wanted to see me, but I told her
to calm down. We're taking it slow.
Well, sorry, but I can't tonight.
I have plans. Kind of busy.
Another chick from Tinder?
No, smart-ass.
A birthday party with some friends.
What friends?
You don't have other friends.
Yes, I do have other friends.
You stick with Daniela.
- Maybe I'll call her.
- Have a great time, then.
- I'll be back late.
- Me too.
- Don't wait up for me.
- I might not even make it home.
[Pedro scoffs]
Flowers for you, sir.
- Which one of us?
- Raúl, they're clearly for me.
- Come on.
- [Raúl] Oh, there's a card.
Hey, stop being nosy.
"I always knew
you'd be an excellent choice."
"Congratulations, Alpha." Huh.
- Do women send men flowers?
- And after ditching her?
Screw her, and she'll buy you a house.
Oh, no shit.
Yeah, see you later, Alpha.
[doorbell rings]
- Santiago, hello.
- Román.
- [Santi chuckles]
- Mmm.
[dog growls]
- Come on in.
- Hello, little guy.
- [dog growls]
- Huh. Hmm.
That's not it.
I love how you organized the place.
And what great natural lighting.
You know, it's dark out,
but you can really tell this is
Don't talk about architecture, damn it.
Let's just relax tonight.
Sorry, yeah. Okay.
- The appetizers.
- Oh.
- Let me introduce Osvaldo.
- Oh, hello.
- Nice to meet you.
- [Santi] Mm.
Actually, I have a friend
who also hired a guy as a maid.
And, well, I think
it's very inclusive. Right?
Osvaldo is my husband.
[Santi] Hmm.
Well, that's even more inclusive.
[chuckles] That's really inclusive.
[clears throat] Hey.
- Woof, woof, woof.
- [dog growls]
- Sit down.
- [clears throat] Yes.
This feels kinda weird.
We need to spend
more quality time together.
We're not just friends. We're married.
Hey, this pasta with truffles is amazing.
I'll order some champagne.
No, no. Don't go crazy.
We're still saving for Iris's braces.
Okay, maybe just one shot, then.
No. Limoncello.
Hey, do do you have any fantasies? Hmm?
Well, it'd be nice
to take the kids to Disney one time
before they get too old
to hang out with us.
- Sexual, Luis. Hmm?
- Oh.
I don't know. For example,
would would you like it
if my tits were bigger or?
You wanna get surgery?
You want me to?
Well, if you want to. But it's not cheap.
Oh, it's not?
Why do you suddenly care
about your tits, Esther?
- Why do you?
- I thought this was about you.
Ulises, what are you doing?
[door closes]
[muffled dance music playing]
Dude, I'm glad you're here. Come in.
Oh, whoa.
You can pay for all of this
and fund my restaurant?
I work mainly with investments.
Plates to Devour is an indulgence.
- Ah.
- Come on. I'll introduce you.
Guys, this is Raúl, my straight friend.
- [cheering]
- [laughing]
[man] So, how did you find out
you were straight?
Watching an aerobics video
with Jane Fonda.
How can you eat a pussy when dicks
are so aesthetically beautiful?
- You're a transphobe.
- Yeah?
Well, I don't know.
It's just what you do, yeah?
- [chuckles]
- Are you heteroflexible?
- Do we have a chance with you?
- [laughing]
[Diego] Don't even try.
He's hung up on his ex.
Oh, for God's sake, you're boring.
[men laughing]
Actually, that's true.
I'm not over her.
[voice breaks] Because Luz
is a beautiful woman.
- [man 2] Oh.
- [sobbing] And she's smart and fun.
And I'm an idiot
who deconstructed himself too late.
- Oh, poor thing. Come here, hold on. Aww.
- He already said no to you.
- I know that. I'm just being supportive.
- [Raúl sobbing] Thank you.
[man 2] Luismi, come here quick!
A straight guy's crying. Hurry!
Come. I'll introduce you to Eva.
Who's this Eva?
Engineer, researcher, and anthropologist.
And she's written three books.
Is she sexy?
- Hey, Eva. This is Raúl.
- Hey.
Oh, damn. [chuckles]
- Good evening!
- Shh! Quiet.
- The kids are asleep.
- [Esther chuckles] I didn't think.
- How was it?
- How'd it go?
- [Álex] Yeah, sure.
- Hey, but wait. Your money.
- Let's see. My gosh. So, so fast.
- Okay.
- [Álex sniffles]
- Let's see, 20
[Luis] Oh.
[exhales] Look at those guys.
- [both chuckle]
- They actually look like nice little kids.
- Let's go have some fun, hmm?
- Oh.
- Now?
- Mm-hmm.
But the I'm sleepy from the limoncello.
Well, at least I tried.
I'm gonna go brush my teeth.
Well, let's go make out.
We're not just friends. [chuckles]
[door opens]
Álex. Álex. Oh, no.
My fifth body.
- Weren't you on three?
- I've had a really good week.
Álex, my boss is gay.
I confused his husband,
who's Cuban, for his maid,
and I wanted to die.
But you know, I was thinking that maybe
he's not as traditional
as I assumed and might not care
You know, your bald
friend's son is a sexual offender.
[doorbell ringing]
[grunts] What's wrong?
- [exhales]
- Kill that asshole.
- [Luis groans]
- I'm getting the gun. [grunts]
Open this door right now.
- Open it!
- [beeps]
Come on, he's just a kid.
You know he doesn't understand.
- Understand what? He squeezed my breast!
- This is a big deal, a very big deal!
[Luis] Shh! Hey, listen.
I know Ulises has been acting out
for attention, and that's all.
Oh, that's all? Nothing happened here?
- We'll talk.
- I'll report him.
- [Santi] Yeah.
- No, don't. It'll go on his record.
Leave your kids with their grandparents.
But she offered it to us.
Fifteen an hour and wants to report us?
Your little baby boy
is a pervert shithead!
- He's 11 years old! Luis!
- I get it.
I mean, Álex is showing
a lot of cleavage today.
- Come again?
- This is stupid. Unbelievable!
- Come on. She could be in her bra, Luis!
- [Luis] Shh!
[Santi] Did you take that course?
- Give me your diploma back now.
- This is what they mean by rape culture.
- You're educating a sex offender.
- Well said.
Get out of my house. Screw you.
What nonsense! This is shit. Out!
- Wait. Don't argue in the hallway.
- We're leaving. This is ridiculous!
- Come on.
- [Santi] No, please. We're going.
- Reflect on this, Luis. Reflect on this.
- [Luis] Tomorrow.
- Unbelievable!
- Shh!
Look, I don't think it would be bad
to tell the boy not to touch
people's breasts without permission.
- [exhales]
- You know, to avoid this.
[exhales, groans]
Go, go.
Tied, game point.
My serve to Luis.
All right, go!
- Holy shit!
- [grunts]
- Mine, mine, mine, mine!
- Mine, leave it. I've got it! Ugh!
[grunts] Damn!
- Got you!
- [Raúl] What was that, dude?
He's all worked up, fucking bastard!
- My daughter is not a whore!
- You called my son a sex offender!
- 'Cause he is!
- He's 11 years old!
Look, you ought to talk
about this stuff before the game, yeah?
I'm not comfortable with this
much aggression. Sorry, you guys.
It's too much.
What the hell was that?
Raúl. Hey, stop this crap, you guys.
You're causing more problems.
Is there anything more serious than
his horny son sexually assaulting Álex?
He didn't know what he was doing.
Oh, my. Hey, Raúl has
another group of friends.
Wait, hang on. Another group of friends?
I don't have other friends.
Do you have other friends?
I don't. There's no way.
He probably went out whoring
and used fake friends as an excuse.
How though? He's got no money.
- Who are they though?
- I don't know.
Well, find out, damn it.
He lives with you.
All right.
When you're entering the roundabout,
you must drive in the right lane.
This one, the right one. Period.
Well, once, I was in the right lane.
This guy in the left lane took the exit.
And I got hit. He blamed me though.
[Esther] That man is an idiot,
and one day,
he'll be in one
of these chairs like all of you.
Who the hell even invented roundabouts?
[Esther] Complain
to the Department of Transportation.
I want you all to practice until 12,
when a one-armed guy is coming to explain
why you don't drive
with your arm out the window.
I thought you were in Tarifa.
- Yes, but I ran into Héctor's son.
- [gasps] The asshole?
[gasps] He fucks really well.
- Girl, girl, girl!
- Yeah.
What are you gonna do?
I don't know. That's why I'm here.
You already fucked him.
What am I supposed to say?
Stupid mojitos.
What about Héctor? Do I tell him or not?
I mean, I would probably
and tell him before his kid does.
"Papa, I fucked your girlfriend."
- [laughs]
- Come on, would he do that?
Well, maybe it'll give him a heart attack,
and then he'll get the inheritance.
Esther, I've never cheated
before in my life. I don't do that.
What a cool life you have.
And you know why?
Because you don't have children.
If you did,
you wouldn't be able to go to Tarifa
and screw someone's son. [laughs]
Thank you. You've been so helpful.
Let me know, yeah?
You're like my Turkish soap opera.
[laughs] Oh.
[man] Welcome. Garage number 207.
Thank you.
What is this place, a drive-through?
Oh, hi. Where the hell are we?
Somewhere discreet.
Recommended by Luis.
I ordered champagne.
Roses and balloons seemed
to be a little tacky.
But this is disgusting.
It's all, "Come here,
do what you gotta do, and see ya."
But you wanted to be on the down-low.
Yes, but somewhere more romantic.
I don't know, a cabin in the Alps
or a floating suite in the Maldives.
Or in my mansion
that you used to love, remember?
No, thank you. Way too risky.
- I could hide you in my trunk if you want.
- Hmm.
Find a place better than this.
I'll see you at your house.
Hey, come and get in the jacuzzi.
It's all paid.
Yeah, right.
Like I'd ever get in there. Ha!
[Patrick] The same way
straight isn't synonymous
with being traditional, being gay
isn't synonymous with being liberal.
So, what do I do? Huh?
Because a deconstructed man
should not have to hide or deceive people.
- Don't you agree, Pat?
- No, stop that.
I'm not gonna be responsible
for you getting fired.
Come on, if my boss finds out
I'm sleeping with Paula, am I done for?
I can't use the video as protection?
What video?
The active consent video.
I recorded her.
My lawyer advised me to do that.
Dear God. Well, go and ask her.
Okay, thank you, Patrick.
I'll let you know, okay?
- Uh, Santi. Santi.
- What?
Stop calling me.
Relax, the Employment Act
recognizes intimacy between employees,
and worst case,
that video proves it was consensual sex.
And so now what do I do?
Do I tell him or not?
What for?
Keep it a secret. That's more fun.
[teacher] In molecules
- Dad, I'm in class.
- [Santi] Yeah, just a quick question.
Should I tell my boss
I'm in a relationship with Paula?
What relationship? Wasn't it just sex?
Dad, don't tell me you're falling in love.
No, I'm not falling in love with her.
[teacher] Alejandra Peralta!
- Damn.
- No, wait. What do I do? Álex, wait!
You know, I got the balls to say it.
No, I do not. No.
[Luis] Hi, honey.
[both moan]
[Esther] Bed, now.
What, now? At four o'clock?
I have a surprise. [laughs]
Are you good? My nose itches. [exhales]
- [grunts]
- You like it?
- [chuckling] Yeah, sure.
- [Esther] Mm!
- Can you breathe?
- Just be quiet!
Damn, that fucking hurt.
- [gasps] Now, open wide.
- Hey, no, no
- Open your mouth nice and wide.
- [muffled] Fuck.
Just hold on. You're gonna love it.
I promise. Help me out!
Esther, please.
You're gonna like it.
Come on, this fucking
- Got it. There, there! [exhales]
- [groans]
Oh, the whip.
- Stay here.
- [grunting]
[coughing, gagging]
- Uh, are you okay, Luis? Luis!
- No, I'm choking.
- I'm choking!
- Oh, please. For fuck's sake, man, really?
[both grunt]
- Hold on. [exhales]
- [gasps]
- What was that about?
- Well, I was trying this BDS stuff.
It's your thing.
It's your thing. You searched it online.
- Not me.
- When you watch porn, delete the history.
I don't watch porn. At least, not online.
[exhales] Oh, no?
If it wasn't you and it wasn't me,
who was it? Your mother?
Ulises has shown pornographic videos
to all the boys and girls in his class.
We caught him
with his tablet during recess.
I've made a note
of the content they accessed.
Well, listen, he's an innocent child.
He's just curious.
Uh, well, sex is natural, no?
- Natural?
- [both] Hmm.
"My friend comes home drunk
and gets fucked in her butt."
"Horny bitch swallows three dicks."
"My stepsister does double penetration."
"I suck my landlord's dick
once a month to pay the rent."
[sighs] Luis, we're raising a monster.
I mean, going from Paw Patrol
to double penetration,
wouldn't you say that's a pretty big jump?
It's your fault for leaving that vibrator
in the bathroom. That's how it started.
He thought it was a rocket.
Oh, does he masturbate?
It's both our fault, because we
haven't talked about sex with the kid.
When are you supposed to talk about sex?
Well, before they start watching porn.
I knew it. I did.
We should have just had girls. [exhales]
- [Héctor] Hi, honey.
- Hi.
Mm. How was your trip? Did you disconnect?
Well, two days
isn't really enough time to.
So, I got us appointments
at the best two fertility clinics
so they can give us all the info.
No pressure, huh?
Dad already told me
that you were thinking about it.
Oh, you're visiting.
Yes, Álvaro was on vacation
for a couple of days too. [chuckles]
- Oh, yeah?
- Yes, in Mallorca.
- [Luz] Great. How was it?
- Oof, lovely.
Why don't the three of us
go out for dinner right now?
Uh, no, no, no, just came here
to give you a little smooch. Mm!
Are you okay?
Yes. It's it's just that
I have court tomorrow, and, uh,
and I'd rather sleep at home by myself.
My mind's on other things.
When you said you had your mind
on other things, did you mean me?
- What are you doing?
- What's wrong? What did I say?
Tarifa never happened, okay?
I love your father.
You sure? Because it's six months,
and you're already like this.
What kind of son fucks his stepmother?
And what kind of stepmother
fucks her stepson?
Honestly, I did it for my father.
You're not right for him.
- Oh, really?
- No.
- Mm.
- My father doesn't deserve a cheater.
However, I do.
I'm a disgusting human. I deserve you.
Álvaro, I'm not
leaving your father for you.
Okay. Just think about it.
Stay out of my life.
[Álvaro groans]
Hey. I feel really bad about this.
[engine turns over]
Uh, Ulises, honey.
Your teacher Erika told us today that,
uh that you showed some videos
uh, that are dirty,
to your friends at school.
- A tattletale.
- No, no, no, no, no. Honey, honey.
It it's normal
to be curious about your body.
- And other people's as well.
- Hmm. Hmm?
But sex is not what you see
in those videos on the internet.
- What is then?
- [Esther] Uh
Well, sex is a beautiful thing
that moms and dads do
when they love each other very much. Hmm.
Mom and you do that together?
- Well, uh, yeah. Yeah.
- Uh, well, uh, sometimes.
Uh, well, no, not everything.
And and with love involved.
- That's gross!
- No, no, sex isn't gross.
What is gross is porn.
Yeah, the people you see there,
they don't love each other.
- No.
- It's all a lie.
And then it creates these expectations,
but it's not like that in real life.
- [Ulises] What's it like?
- Well, honey, a lot more dull.
- More boring, kind of predictable.
- Esther.
Well, right. You have time
to find out for yourself. There's no rush.
And if you stop watching those videos,
I'll buy you Call of Duty.
- Huh? [laughs]
- Okay.
Well done, Luis.
You traded sex videos for violence.
Well, it's not as bad though.
[clears throat, exhales]
[clears throat] Román. Hey.
Come in, Santiago, come in.
- Uh, any news on the project?
- Relax, it'll happen.
But assume she's going
to request a lot of changes.
You have to keep your mind flexible.
Oh, yeah. Exactly.
Talking about that,
having a mind that's flexible.
See, um, there's something
I want to tell you,
uh, because you put a lot of trust in me.
- And well, I feel
- You're gay. That's what I told Osvaldo.
- [chuckles]
- No, I'm not. No.
I mean, if I was, then no problem.
Uh, no, I have a lot of gay friends.
My boss is gay, see? [chuckles]
All right. No, no.
But but I'm the thing
- Uh, I'm trying
- [Paula] Documents from city hall.
Thank you, honey.
[Paula grunts]
- Honey?
- [Paula] Uh, Papa.
- [Román] Sorry, sorry.
- Papa?
She doesn't want people to find out
that she's my daughter. Isn't that crazy?
Don't tell anyone. Hmm?
Okay, what was so important
that you wanted to tell me?
I'm giving up coffee.
Mm-hmm. The one you gave me yesterday,
down the sink. I poured it out.
And are you going to a rehab center
or group therapy or?
Nope. I'm done.
I'm good. Mm-hmm.
And, well, if you see me
acting a bit strange and so on,
it's just symptoms of withdrawal.
I saw you acting strange
and thought you were just like that.
Nope. No, it was the coffee.
The coffee. Mm-hmm. Oh! [grunts]
- Whoa!
- Why didn't you tell me?
I don't want people
to associate me with my father.
But you work for his company.
I changed my last name. Otherwise,
people don't treat you the same way.
Would you have gone out with me?
See what I mean?
Was gonna say yes
if you gave me the chance.
Why are you freaking out?
Because you have to tell me this stuff.
Are we in a relationship or not?
I don't know. That's up to you.
[exhales] Oh, Lord.
What are you doing?
Studying. I have a date
with an engineer and an anthropologist.
Wow, what a combination.
Did you know the Neolithic period started
when people discovered agriculture?
Don't study something
she knows about, dude.
You gotta go for something different.
Damn, you're right.
Philosophy and literature,
that'll show her.
- [keys clacking]
- She's hot, right?
[scoffs] Super hot. I can't ruin it.
Does she look like Luz? Just saying.
You might unconsciously
be looking for someone like her.
- Not looking for anything. I was set up.
- By who?
- These new friends of yours?
- Would you let me study?
- [scoffs]
- [doorbell rings]
[Pedro exhales]
[gasps] Uh hi.
- Uh, is Pedro here?
- Yes.
- [Pedro] Come in.
- [chuckles] Oh. Hello.
[Pedro exhales]
- Who's that?
- The maid.
Oh. I don't think anyone saw me.
"Immanuel Kant, principle of causation."
"Nietzsche, great man. God. God's dead."
He's got a date
with a chick who's really smart.
- Nope, she's not smart.
- [chuckles]
Raúl, come on, man.
You're gonna be late. Come on. Let's go.
- [Raúl exhales]
- [Pedro hums]
[sighs] Oh, these flowers are lovely.
He got them
from his boss 'cause he's an alpha.
Mm, get out. What are you doing, dude?
- Beverage?
- [gasps] No.
No, thank you. Uh, I can get one.
I used to live in this house last year.
What do we do?
[clicks tongue] What's up
with you and your boss?
- Uh, nothing.
- Hmm.
Hey, it turns out women also send flowers.
Uh, yeah.
Sweetie, if this is the typical,
"I'll get back with her out of revenge."
- "Then get rid of her"
- No. I want to be with you.
But like a real couple that live together.
[Daniela] Mm.
[kisses] You're the woman of my dreams.
And I want us to have a project together.
- And grow old together.
- [laughing]
- [Pedro exhales]
- Sorry.
Sorry. It's just you sound so weird
when you get all romantic like that.
No, I'm being serious. [exhales]
Uh, Pedro, I don't know.
It's just you let me down.
I'm worried I'm making a mistake again.
And my sister thinks so too.
Well, Patricia really likes me.
Patri comes from a culture
that's so sexist. She's not objective.
Hey, I got deconstructed, okay?
I have a diploma. I'll get it. Stefan!
- Oh, boy, he's bringing it.
- [Pedro] Stefan, where's my diploma?
[Stefan] Diploma?
Well, yes, yes. I'm very Aristotelian.
[Eva] Mm-hmm.
I mean, his metaphysics was more
more critical than Plato's.
But at the same time, it was constructive.
Well, actually, the terminology
of metaphysics was coined
by Andronicus of Rhodes.
He edited his works.
Oh, so you know about philosophy?
Not much.
As much as anyone who's curious
about the basics of life, you know?
And literature? What about that?
What century?
19th century.
Oh. My favorite.
Jane Austen, Lord Byron,
Dickens, Victor Hugo,
Gertrudis Gómez de Avellaneda.
People talk about Rosalía de Castro,
but for me, Emilia Pardo Bazán
was the intellectual of her era.
Look, she wrote novels,
critiques, essays, poetry, theater.
She was a translator
and even an advocate for women's rights.
You got any ibuprofen?
Do you feel bad?
If you want, we can hang another day.
No, no, I've got this far.
Oh, just wait. I'll get you
a naproxen with esomeprazole.
- It absorbs much faster.
- Hmm.
Have you read all these books?
[Eva] I don't sleep much,
and I don't have a TV.
It's crazy, but it's true
that a black hole emits radiation.
Yes, because according
to uncertainty principle by Heisenberg,
when a quantum fluctuation occurs
and a particle-antiparticle pair
is created,
the possibility that one of them
is created behind the event horizon
is not zero.
No, no. And that radiation
causes the singularity to lose mass.
- [chuckles]
- This isn't working out.
What isn't?
Us two. It's great
when we don't speak, but then
I mean, if you don't want
a serious relationship, that's fine.
- You can say that.
- No, no, I do want it.
But you're overqualified for the position.
Hello. I'm Pedro Aguilar,
and I wanted to take advantage
of this beautiful day to tell you all
that I made a mistake.
And there's nothing wrong with doing that.
By embracing my vulnerability, I realized
that my attitude was just a front,
because masculinity in society
also oppresses men as well.
We shouldn't try to legitimize patriarchy,
but convert ourselves into feminist men.
- Like I did. [laughs]
- And we're back together!
- [Daniela laughs]
- [Pedro] Oh, darling!
[clears throat] Uh,
what about the weight of your balls?
[Santi] You posted it
because she asked you to, right?
No shit. Why else
would I make a fool of myself like that?
Uh, Santi, dude, you, uh
I think you were right.
Ulises is a pervert.
We caught him watching porn.
No way.
But how old is your son?
- Eleven.
- And a half.
Imagine if we had access
to all the porn in the world at his age.
[laughs] We wouldn't have survived
our adolescence.
The new generations are totally screwed.
Hey, and you're a policeman.
Haven't you heard of controls for parents?
Who you calling?
Patrick. Uh, what's up?
Uh, look. It's me, Santi.
Uh, no, no, no, it's quick.
I'll be quick here, uh
Do you teach deconstructing
masculinity courses for boys?
You mean prevention of masculinity?
You'd really strike gold. Yeah, yeah.
Because, come on, it's like vaccinating
them against being sexist.
Okay, but think about it.
Think about it, Pat.
Okay. Well, let's see if he does it.
Then you can take him.
- [Luis] Hmm.
- Shh! Hey, he's coming. He's coming.
- Shh!
- [Santi, Luis] Hey!
- Hey.
- What's up, fellas? A beer for me.
- How was your date?
- [Raúl] Not good.
Going out with a smart girl,
it's mentally draining.
Look, Raúl, they can't be taller than you.
They can't be smarter than you.
You're limiting the market a lot now.
- [Luis chuckles]
- Well, it's time, my dudes.
The three of us have been talking,
and as your friends,
your friends for life, actually,
we think we have a right to know who
else you're hanging out with besides us.
You're ruining a basic rule of friendship.
Friends shouldn't behave
like your girlfriend.
- Who's the idiot that told you that?
- He did.
Uh, dude, it's been a long time,
so it kind of hurts.
It feels like you're cheating on us.
Okay. I've been hanging out
with Diego and his friends.
Yes. So what? I'm the straight one.
And I mean,
they give me stuff that you guys don't.
Oh. Give you what?
Well, for example, they ask me how I feel,
which you guys never do.
Come on, if something happens,
you'll tell us, no?
And they notice if I get my hair cut.
You got a haircut?
See? And with you guys,
I never feel comfortable enough to cry.
- They saw you crying?
- What?
[Raúl] So, I'm sorry,
but I want our friendship to be open.
Can we think about it for a while?
[classical music playing]
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